thank you Finn. You always manage to put things in perspective! I moved to the UK over 15 years ago and I'm truly grateful for the NHS. In my home country, Greece, trans people "do not exist", are not covered in any way, whether through legislation or medically and it's a daily strife to just exist. I'm a bit over 42 but started off quite late, at 41, to finally flesh out my true self and dealt with waiting times exactly as you did Exercise and adjustments in nutrition and a focus on becoming a better human being above all. Time flew by and all the hard work has paid off so far. Again, I wouldn't be able to do this without the NHS, so, no matter how long it takes, I'm happy to wait. Currently waiting for top surgery appointment after receiving referral. Working out plenty, doing martial arts and having a part time job is keeping me busy! Rock on Finn!
+Sidd Danis Love your attitude! I also love to work on being a better human, I was a pretty poor one not so long ago! We have so very much power to change ourselves but sometimes it takes us a while to realise it! Great to meet another "late starter" I think that makes us even more grateful for it! Awful to hear about Greece, I did not realise this! Much love and light to you my friend.
This video has really helped me today. I'm still in pain but i can use this waiting time to make things better for myself in other ways. Really great advice Finn thank you. 💙
+Cole I am so sorry you are struggling . I really feel for you. Small goals really help to breakdown the time. Surround yourself with people who get it and can remind you who you are. Much love to you
Hi Finn, you look great and conduct yourself very confidently and happily. This information was very very helpful! I will subscribe shortly - at the moment I am in the process of changing (I'm right at the beginning - only my wife and gay brother know). Keep up the good work!
Yes, being thankful for the NHS has to be the only reason to hold on. It's insane how long this process is now. Up here in Scotland, two years just to get in the GIC door. Thank you.
Hi my friend, yes, its awful how long the wait is, and for people in Scotland and Ireland I know its so much worse. I am hoping the government will make this a priority asap. There is much research at the moment, proving how trans peoples mental health is in dire straits because of the wait.
This video is exactly what I needed to see today. I'm so depressed because I need to wait for 1 year and 7 months to get phalloplasty because there's only one doctor who does this kind of surgery in my country. I keep thinking about how I wouldn't have to wait that long if only I lived in another country. And about how much older I will be when I'm actually finished with all stages of surgery. And I'm worried about the date being postponed. But this video really helped me because it reminds me that no matter how long the waiting time is now, I will eventually get there.
I’m in Canada and it’s a very similar situation... 6-12 months just for the first appointment and then an unknown amount of time after that before you can start hormones. I’m at a point where I’m so desperate to start T... I would do anything. Absolutely anything. I’m suffering so badly. Of course I’m also desperate for top surgery but that’s even further away (3-4 YEARS... ugh) so I’m not even allowing myself to think about it. Videos like this help me so much. It really helps to see how many others have gone through this and made it out okay eventually. I have my days when I sob in my bed at night because I feel so powerless and desperate. Being able to relate to others is so so helpful. I really love your advice in this video about small manageable goals. It’s so easy for me to focus on the future maybe 3-4 years from now when I know I will be so much more happy in my life, and it feels so close yet so far away at the same time. There are so many things I want to do, but it’s not the right time yet. I like the idea of starting a new exercise routine, I should do that. Thank you for this video.
+Guppy bless you my friend. This journey takes a ton of patience, persistence and resilience. I know that Canada's system is particularly troublesome. The only way to do This journey and maintain good mental health is to take everything one day at a time. Little achievements, large goals broken down, otherwise we can get lost in wanting thst completion date right now which causes so much pain. You will get there my friend, I've day at a time and you will look back on all this as a time you really gained strength and inner knowledge that few humans ever come close to. Sending a ton of love
I've been waiting on the NHS for 3 years and it hasn't been fun but its given my family time to adjust. i know getting T isn't going to be something thats going to make me happy and content with my body, I've got to do that, so I've made the change to start working out and eating right. when i start T(should be in a few months when i get the letter) i will be more confident but waiting this long has made me stronger and more determined to live a better life.
+Finn Elijah bless you mate, it is so good that you have managed to turn something negative into something positive, that is what this is all about! It doesnt make these waiting times right, a three year wait is unexcusable, however, with the right attitude we can not only survive these unfair obstacles, but we can also flourish, as you clearly have! I am sending positive vibes your way that the long awaited letter arrives for you soon!
Yes to all this. I can confirm that even going the private route is even quite long. I'm in and out of that spiral you speak of. Great positive post Finn 🙌🏽😊
+Ethan James Thank you so much my friend. I think whatever way we transition, we all experiences some kind of wait or having to deal with something we cant have, its a common experience in our journey. All the very best to you.
this really can apply to anything, I love your outlook on everything and I really hope some changes are made here in the USA for transgender people who need help becoming who they feel they are inside.
+NinaBeener West I agree my friend, this is the formula that I apply yo my whole life now and it works, it doesnt mean life is easy, but it gives me control over my feelings and actions in life, in that is empowerment and better feeling! We have issues all over the world, I mentioned America but there are many other countries where trans people are denied access to medical care or have to fight for years to get help. I too hope that its sooner rather than later, thanks my friend.
Thank you for including thoughts for us in the US. Though I have griped about the waiting time, I will have to say the beginning for me was relatively a short time. I'm 8 months "out" and 5 months on T. Trying desperately to save for top surgery but not easy with a low income and dependent son. I just started private health ins. but discovered it won't cover ANYTHING!!! AAAAARRRGGGHHH! So, I'm taking your advice and trying to do positive things. I'm taking care of my health(because I'm old and don't want to croak before I get surgery! Ha!) and working two extra jobs. I tell myself every day..do what you can today, it's just one day..you can do anything for one day and before I know it a week has past! Love you, Finn and send some to Drew.
+Charlie Strickland Bless you mate, your message was one of the prompts to do this vlog. Its so frustrating that some insurers cover and some dont, my heart goes out to you with the challenges you have. It is exactly as you say, one day at a time, doing all you can and those one days suddenly add up and you find you have both managed and achieved! I really hope that the universe presents an answer for you soon. Much love to you my dear friend.
I've just watched so many of your videos and love them. After all of the waiting, I finally got my first T shot today. Just wanted to share some good news. Waiting is frustrating and shouldn't be as long as it is, but when the time finally comes, its amazing as I'm sure you know!
GREAT VIDEO Finn! Thank you so much for taking the time to make this video. I truly does apply to anything in life. I was never in AA but I know the prayer and say it often ( at work a lot actually)...that alone is a useful tool in my opinion. Anyway, thank you. Oh...and happy early birthday as well!!! Mine was last week (turned 33) and I asked for money to go towards my name change. ;)
+Parker Shot Thank you my friend, this was one of those videos that I worried about putting out there as I know this stuff can be hard to hear for some. Its the only approach that makes sense, waiting times are already a torture, why add to it by then torturing ourselves even more, it is what it is unfortunately! The serenity prayer is quite literally a God send! I am so grateful to AA, the programme has helped me with every aspect of my life in the tools it has given me. Happy birthday to you too! Great idea for a birthday present!! One you will carry with you forever!
Thank you so much for this video, this is exactly what I needed. After over half a year later I just got my diagnose yesterday. I didn't feel joy at all. I've known I'm trans for years and it pains me to have my life in other people's hands. Now my next appointment will be in the summer, when they'll check if hormone treatment is ok for me. It might take another appointment to get a prescription. And the effects of testosterone take their own time, the waiting really is agonising. with this video you really gave me hope and reminded me to focus on the good things, spend my time meaningfully and accept the inevitable. I'll try to go to the next trans support group meeting to listen to and talk with some peers.
+canis familiaris Hi my friend. It is so very hard to have our lives in other peoples hands, this is why it is important to reclaim the power that we do have, in choosing our response to these frustrations. It is so important to connect with the community, I have been held up so many times by kind people who held the faith for me when I couldnt, we need each other so connect where you can. All the very best to you :)
+PoeBoi Kramere It is frustrating, and rightly so! BUT....we do at least have some power in how we choose to respond. Hoping for good things for you soon buddy :)
I'm currently pre-T and waiting. I came out about eight months ago, but I've known my gender identity for about a year. My parents aren't supportive of who I am, so I'm forced to do the whole process alone. I've been working with a therapist for over a year to try go get somewhere with transitioning, but so far I have little luck. The closest clinic that works with transgender patients is two hours from where I live, and in order to get an appointment, you need a referral from a medical doctor. My GP retired a couple of years ago, and I haven't reestablished a new doctor since. So, I called to set an appointment up with a new doctor to get a referral, and they told me they have no idea how to help me. I live in a small town, and they have no knowledge on how to help trans patients. I'm still waiting on a call back from them to see if they'll even consider seeing me to talk about referring me to the clinic two hours from me. But even if I get that referral, there's no guarantee that my insurance will cover the cost of it, seeing as my insurance doesn't cover trans health care. It's a mess of hoops I'm trying to jump through, and it's really, really difficult waiting. I look and sound extremely feminine no matter how hard I try, and I genuinely think that hormones will bring me to a much happier state. Right now, knowing I'm not passing well increases my social anxiety by 1000. It's so hard waiting for things to work out for me. I know that I can't do anything to make the situation better and that I should accept it, but it's hard knowing I'm waiting for answers I'm not even sure I'll get. I'm trying my best to cope with waiting, but it is beyond difficult. I often find myself saying "I wish cisgender people knew how lucky they are to not have to fight for the basic right to become who they actually are." :/
+youngblossom I agree with you, one of the most bittersweet gifts of transition is never taking anything for granted ever again. It is so very tough buddy, however, I have seen many guys in tough situations eventually win through. In the meantime, remember there is so much more to you than just transition, nurture your beautiful self, surround yourself with people who do see the real you, even if that mean just plugging into an online community to make freinds and share the load. Wishing you a break in the clouds my friend
I deal with wait times much the same way you mentioned. I've been blessed. Insurance is very very slowly starting to cover trans related care here in the US and for those like myself who are on disability and on the governments assistance program Medicare, the restriction for surgery was lifted not that long ago and in a few states the state rare assistance programs are starting to include trans care. But very few surgeons accept the governments insurance. Still, it was because if thus that I was able to get my too surgery this January when before we had no idea when we'd ever be able to save the money for it. I had a hard enough time saving for my name change. So I do feel very blessed that my insurance finally covers it. Definitely worth the wait. Now it's going to be a wait to see which surgeon will be willing to take the insurance for bottom surgery. In the mean time I need to loose weight. XD
+Nicolas Burton (Mint Fox Talks) I am so pleased to hear there is some forward movement. It is a tough journey, to not only have to cope with the challenges of being trans, but also to fight an inadequate system, a double blow. I am glad things are getting better for you my friend, heres to a bright future!!!
It's so very difficult. Another resource here that many people don't know about is the Jim Collins Foundation grant. Once a year they choose one or two applicants to receive grants towards their surgery(s) that they need. I applied 2 years my second year I'd made it to their finalist list once, but didn't get chosen for that year. I didn't apply again because I'd already gotten an appointment for a consult with my insurance. They get a huge number of applicants even though not many people in the US, that I've come across anyway, know about it. So they pick applicants who are in the most financial need and who are the most prepared by having the therapist letters and things they need. And for me anyway, it put my focus on a possible solution to my problem by applying for the grant each year. I was at least working towards it somehow if I couldn't any other way. It's great that our government us finally getting a clue and I hope and pray that we can elect a progressive president instead of going backwards this election. As you said, here's to a brighter future!!! :)
I'm very late to this video but thank you so much for this. I've been having a rough patch recently and this has really helped. I'm not chirtian but the serenity prayer really resonated with me so thank you for sharing that also.
It sounds like you wasnt late at all but in fact perfectly well timed! The serenity prayer is such an incredible little tool to have in your pocket. Im a spiritual chap, not religious, but I dont think it matters wih this prayer. Its the meaning which is importnant. I hope things settle down for you soon.
Transitioning on nhs since 2014 March 2018 Gic/ hospital lost my referral for grs taken a year to sort out, still have not had initial appointment with surgeon then going to fight not to be put at the bottom of waiting list for surgery as I’m already year behind due to negligence which is no fault of my own.
Thank you so much for this video! I am currently waiting for my 3rd appointment which is March 9th. Do you know how long you have to wait after your 3rd appointment to get hormones? This video has helped me alot and i think your great support to the trans community :)
+Thomas-Jay Baillie Thank you my friend. It really all depends on which clinic you are at. I was at the laurels so after my third therapist appointment I was then referred to the clinic doctor who has the final say on prescribing T. It was a 3 month wait when I was there. Once I saw the doctor and got the go ahead, it was then just a couple of weeks whilst I waited for them to send a letter to my doctor, and then to see my doctor for a prescription, and then a nurse appointment to stick it in my bum :) It certainly doesnt sound very long away for you my friend :)
+FinnTheInfinncible yeah I'm at Nottingham but I'm sure it's the same procedure. shouldn't be too long now just got to use time effectively like you said
I waited five years to get on T, I got through it by getting obsessed with TV series . I've been on T for about ten months now and now I'm waiting to get top surgery. It's April 16th. I'm finding that waiting for that is ten times more difficult then anything I've experienced. It's so terrible. It's like the closer my date gets the worse my dsyphoria becomes? Yikes
There is a gender clinic in Ontario the province I live in Canada, but it is an hour away from me. I am on the waiting list right now for top surgery. I have to wait a year for an appointment there. I am thankful they have this in Ontario Canada. I didn't go there for my hormones though I went to a doctor closer to where I live and they got funding for the hormones, so I don't have to pay for that either.
+Casey Dietz I have a friend in Canada who has had to fight for years for all his medical treatment. His determination has finally paid off and he is now having first stage lower surgery. I hope that things continue to improve for everyone no matter where they live. I hope you hear soon my friend. Keep the faith!
+FinnTheInfinncible maybe that's why I keep going! like you, I take each day at a time. Good days, bad... we all get them no matter situation/circumstance.
I don't know how old this video is(UA-cam no longer shows when videos were uploaded) but as a non binary MTF person I got at least another 4 years to wait, already been waiting more than a year. The waiting times are so bad I have resorted to self medicating which is costing me a small fortune in having to import my meds from the other side of the world. No way am I waiting that long. By the time I am seen in my early to mid 50s I could be bald as a coot by then. I could be nearly 60 by the time I get GCS and that is on the optimist side.
I am so sorry my friend, the waiting lists at the moment are hellish. In my experience, there were a few things that helped me to manage the frustration of my wait and look after my mental health, I will share a blog with you that I wrote about this , perhaps it may be helpful. Thinking of you finlaygames.com/5-tips-coping-with-waiting-times-gender-transition/
+friendoftherese1 Bless you! thank you! I dont have a PO box, lots of people are asking me this...maybe i should. I am happy to give you my address... Ive had enough interaction with you to know you dont want to kill me ;)
LOL! You can rest easy---I certainly DON'T want to kill you! If you want to friend me on facebook, you can message me with your address. My facebook page is under Sparrow Rose, and I live in Indianapolis,Indiana, U.S.A. (if there are several Sparrow Roses)
Getting hrt and surgeries are not going to complete or give one a life. It helps with body and mind agree ment but take the time to build self worth, build relationships, take up hobbies, learn another language, travel, read large book series. Sometimes the only cure impatience to be patient.
+Nelianne90 haha!! Yes I get that a lot! It is one of the bonuses of being a trans man and going through puberty late! Thanks so much for the compliment!
thank you Finn. You always manage to put things in perspective! I moved to the UK over 15 years ago and I'm truly grateful for the NHS. In my home country, Greece, trans people "do not exist", are not covered in any way, whether through legislation or medically and it's a daily strife to just exist. I'm a bit over 42 but started off quite late, at 41, to finally flesh out my true self and dealt with waiting times exactly as you did
Exercise and adjustments in nutrition and a focus on becoming a better human being above all. Time flew by and all the hard work has paid off so far. Again, I wouldn't be able to do this without the NHS, so, no matter how long it takes, I'm happy to wait. Currently waiting for top surgery appointment after receiving referral. Working out plenty, doing martial arts and having a part time job is keeping me busy!
Rock on Finn!
+Sidd Danis Love your attitude! I also love to work on being a better human, I was a pretty poor one not so long ago! We have so very much power to change ourselves but sometimes it takes us a while to realise it! Great to meet another "late starter" I think that makes us even more grateful for it! Awful to hear about Greece, I did not realise this! Much love and light to you my friend.
This video has really helped me today. I'm still in pain but i can use this waiting time to make things better for myself in other ways. Really great advice Finn thank you. 💙
+Cole I am so sorry you are struggling . I really feel for you. Small goals really help to breakdown the time. Surround yourself with people who get it and can remind you who you are. Much love to you
Hi Finn, you look great and conduct yourself very confidently and happily. This information was very very helpful! I will subscribe shortly - at the moment I am in the process of changing (I'm right at the beginning - only my wife and gay brother know). Keep up the good work!
Ah! Thank you my friend. Congrats on taking your first steps into a most wonderful journey....it can be treacherous....but all good journeys are!
Thanks for the vlog Finn… It is obvious that you have done massive amounts of inner work , your serenity is palatable . An inspiration ~ many thanks!
+Mar Runsslow thats is a huge compliment, thank you so much my friend
Yes, being thankful for the NHS has to be the only reason to hold on. It's insane how long this process is now. Up here in Scotland, two years just to get in the GIC door. Thank you.
Hi my friend, yes, its awful how long the wait is, and for people in Scotland and Ireland I know its so much worse. I am hoping the government will make this a priority asap. There is much research at the moment, proving how trans peoples mental health is in dire straits because of the wait.
This video is exactly what I needed to see today.
I'm so depressed because I need to wait for 1 year and 7 months to get phalloplasty because there's only one doctor who does this kind of surgery in my country.
I keep thinking about how I wouldn't have to wait that long if only I lived in another country.
And about how much older I will be when I'm actually finished with all stages of surgery.
And I'm worried about the date being postponed.
But this video really helped me because it reminds me that no matter how long the waiting time is now, I will eventually get there.
I’m in Canada and it’s a very similar situation... 6-12 months just for the first appointment and then an unknown amount of time after that before you can start hormones. I’m at a point where I’m so desperate to start T... I would do anything. Absolutely anything. I’m suffering so badly. Of course I’m also desperate for top surgery but that’s even further away (3-4 YEARS... ugh) so I’m not even allowing myself to think about it.
Videos like this help me so much. It really helps to see how many others have gone through this and made it out okay eventually. I have my days when I sob in my bed at night because I feel so powerless and desperate. Being able to relate to others is so so helpful. I really love your advice in this video about small manageable goals. It’s so easy for me to focus on the future maybe 3-4 years from now when I know I will be so much more happy in my life, and it feels so close yet so far away at the same time. There are so many things I want to do, but it’s not the right time yet. I like the idea of starting a new exercise routine, I should do that. Thank you for this video.
+Guppy bless you my friend. This journey takes a ton of patience, persistence and resilience. I know that Canada's system is particularly troublesome.
The only way to do This journey and maintain good mental health is to take everything one day at a time. Little achievements, large goals broken down, otherwise we can get lost in wanting thst completion date right now which causes so much pain.
You will get there my friend, I've day at a time and you will look back on all this as a time you really gained strength and inner knowledge that few humans ever come close to.
Sending a ton of love
I've been waiting on the NHS for 3 years and it hasn't been fun but its given my family time to adjust. i know getting T isn't going to be something thats going to make me happy and content with my body, I've got to do that, so I've made the change to start working out and eating right. when i start T(should be in a few months when i get the letter) i will be more confident but waiting this long has made me stronger and more determined to live a better life.
+Finn Elijah bless you mate, it is so good that you have managed to turn something negative into something positive, that is what this is all about! It doesnt make these waiting times right, a three year wait is unexcusable, however, with the right attitude we can not only survive these unfair obstacles, but we can also flourish, as you clearly have! I am sending positive vibes your way that the long awaited letter arrives for you soon!
Yes to all this. I can confirm that even going the private route is even quite long. I'm in and out of that spiral you speak of. Great positive post Finn 🙌🏽😊
+Ethan James Thank you so much my friend. I think whatever way we transition, we all experiences some kind of wait or having to deal with something we cant have, its a common experience in our journey. All the very best to you.
Finn, you're going to be such a great therapist!
thanks so much my friend that means the world! I sincerely hope so!!!
this really can apply to anything, I love your outlook on everything and I really hope some changes are made here in the USA for transgender people who need help becoming who they feel they are inside.
+NinaBeener West I agree my friend, this is the formula that I apply yo my whole life now and it works, it doesnt mean life is easy, but it gives me control over my feelings and actions in life, in that is empowerment and better feeling! We have issues all over the world, I mentioned America but there are many other countries where trans people are denied access to medical care or have to fight for years to get help. I too hope that its sooner rather than later, thanks my friend.
Thank you for including thoughts for us in the US. Though I have griped about the waiting time, I will have to say the beginning for me was relatively a short time. I'm 8 months "out" and 5 months on T. Trying desperately to save for top surgery but not easy with a low income and dependent son. I just started private health ins. but discovered it won't cover ANYTHING!!! AAAAARRRGGGHHH! So, I'm taking your advice and trying to do positive things. I'm taking care of my health(because I'm old and don't want to croak before I get surgery! Ha!) and working two extra jobs. I tell myself every day..do what you can today, it's just one day..you can do anything for one day and before I know it a week has past! Love you, Finn and send some to Drew.
+Charlie Strickland Bless you mate, your message was one of the prompts to do this vlog. Its so frustrating that some insurers cover and some dont, my heart goes out to you with the challenges you have. It is exactly as you say, one day at a time, doing all you can and those one days suddenly add up and you find you have both managed and achieved! I really hope that the universe presents an answer for you soon. Much love to you my dear friend.
Thank you, Finn. Much love to you as always.
I've just watched so many of your videos and love them. After all of the waiting, I finally got my first T shot today. Just wanted to share some good news. Waiting is frustrating and shouldn't be as long as it is, but when the time finally comes, its amazing as I'm sure you know!
+Grayson Z ahhhh yeeessss! fantastic my friend! So pleased for you! isnt it a wonderful feeling, suddenly all the waiting and frustration melts away!
So very well said. Waiting for health benefits is the most difficult part of my transition. Happily I'm out at my job and the hard part is over.
+Sam Anderson Ah well done mate! Come out is tough....but liberating! And so the journey begins!
Wheee!!! Lol
+Sam Anderson haha!
GREAT VIDEO Finn! Thank you so much for taking the time to make this video. I truly does apply to anything in life. I was never in AA but I know the prayer and say it often ( at work a lot actually)...that alone is a useful tool in my opinion. Anyway, thank you. Oh...and happy early birthday as well!!! Mine was last week (turned 33) and I asked for money to go towards my name change. ;)
+Parker Shot Thank you my friend, this was one of those videos that I worried about putting out there as I know this stuff can be hard to hear for some. Its the only approach that makes sense, waiting times are already a torture, why add to it by then torturing ourselves even more, it is what it is unfortunately! The serenity prayer is quite literally a God send! I am so grateful to AA, the programme has helped me with every aspect of my life in the tools it has given me. Happy birthday to you too! Great idea for a birthday present!! One you will carry with you forever!
Thank you so much for this video, this is exactly what I needed.
After over half a year later I just got my diagnose yesterday. I didn't feel joy at all. I've known I'm trans for years and it pains me to have my life in other people's hands.
Now my next appointment will be in the summer, when they'll check if hormone treatment is ok for me. It might take another appointment to get a prescription. And the effects of testosterone take their own time, the waiting really is agonising.
with this video you really gave me hope and reminded me to focus on the good things, spend my time meaningfully and accept the inevitable.
I'll try to go to the next trans support group meeting to listen to and talk with some peers.
+canis familiaris Hi my friend. It is so very hard to have our lives in other peoples hands, this is why it is important to reclaim the power that we do have, in choosing our response to these frustrations. It is so important to connect with the community, I have been held up so many times by kind people who held the faith for me when I couldnt, we need each other so connect where you can. All the very best to you :)
Thanks Finn I am nearly 42 myself & haven't got any therapy yet. It's so frustrating for me so thank you.
+PoeBoi Kramere It is frustrating, and rightly so! BUT....we do at least have some power in how we choose to respond. Hoping for good things for you soon buddy :)
Thanks mate appreciate it
I'm currently pre-T and waiting. I came out about eight months ago, but I've known my gender identity for about a year. My parents aren't supportive of who I am, so I'm forced to do the whole process alone. I've been working with a therapist for over a year to try go get somewhere with transitioning, but so far I have little luck. The closest clinic that works with transgender patients is two hours from where I live, and in order to get an appointment, you need a referral from a medical doctor. My GP retired a couple of years ago, and I haven't reestablished a new doctor since. So, I called to set an appointment up with a new doctor to get a referral, and they told me they have no idea how to help me. I live in a small town, and they have no knowledge on how to help trans patients. I'm still waiting on a call back from them to see if they'll even consider seeing me to talk about referring me to the clinic two hours from me. But even if I get that referral, there's no guarantee that my insurance will cover the cost of it, seeing as my insurance doesn't cover trans health care. It's a mess of hoops I'm trying to jump through, and it's really, really difficult waiting. I look and sound extremely feminine no matter how hard I try, and I genuinely think that hormones will bring me to a much happier state. Right now, knowing I'm not passing well increases my social anxiety by 1000. It's so hard waiting for things to work out for me. I know that I can't do anything to make the situation better and that I should accept it, but it's hard knowing I'm waiting for answers I'm not even sure I'll get. I'm trying my best to cope with waiting, but it is beyond difficult. I often find myself saying "I wish cisgender people knew how lucky they are to not have to fight for the basic right to become who they actually are." :/
+youngblossom I agree with you, one of the most bittersweet gifts of transition is never taking anything for granted ever again. It is so very tough buddy, however, I have seen many guys in tough situations eventually win through. In the meantime, remember there is so much more to you than just transition, nurture your beautiful self, surround yourself with people who do see the real you, even if that mean just plugging into an online community to make freinds and share the load. Wishing you a break in the clouds my friend
I deal with wait times much the same way you mentioned. I've been blessed. Insurance is very very slowly starting to cover trans related care here in the US and for those like myself who are on disability and on the governments assistance program Medicare, the restriction for surgery was lifted not that long ago and in a few states the state rare assistance programs are starting to include trans care. But very few surgeons accept the governments insurance. Still, it was because if thus that I was able to get my too surgery this January when before we had no idea when we'd ever be able to save the money for it. I had a hard enough time saving for my name change. So I do feel very blessed that my insurance finally covers it. Definitely worth the wait. Now it's going to be a wait to see which surgeon will be willing to take the insurance for bottom surgery. In the mean time I need to loose weight. XD
+Nicolas Burton (Mint Fox Talks) I am so pleased to hear there is some forward movement. It is a tough journey, to not only have to cope with the challenges of being trans, but also to fight an inadequate system, a double blow. I am glad things are getting better for you my friend, heres to a bright future!!!
It's so very difficult. Another resource here that many people don't know about is the Jim Collins Foundation grant. Once a year they choose one or two applicants to receive grants towards their surgery(s) that they need. I applied 2 years my second year I'd made it to their finalist list once, but didn't get chosen for that year. I didn't apply again because I'd already gotten an appointment for a consult with my insurance. They get a huge number of applicants even though not many people in the US, that I've come across anyway, know about it. So they pick applicants who are in the most financial need and who are the most prepared by having the therapist letters and things they need. And for me anyway, it put my focus on a possible solution to my problem by applying for the grant each year. I was at least working towards it somehow if I couldn't any other way.
It's great that our government us finally getting a clue and I hope and pray that we can elect a progressive president instead of going backwards this election. As you said, here's to a brighter future!!! :)
For anyone interested that URL for the Jim Collins Foundation is: jimcollinsfoundation.org
+Nicolas Burton (Mint Fox Talks) thats fantastic! Thank you for posting that here!
I'm very late to this video but thank you so much for this. I've been having a rough patch recently and this has really helped. I'm not chirtian but the serenity prayer really resonated with me so thank you for sharing that also.
It sounds like you wasnt late at all but in fact perfectly well timed! The serenity prayer is such an incredible little tool to have in your pocket. Im a spiritual chap, not religious, but I dont think it matters wih this prayer. Its the meaning which is importnant. I hope things settle down for you soon.
Transitioning on nhs since 2014 March 2018 Gic/ hospital lost my referral for grs taken a year to sort out, still have not had initial appointment with surgeon then going to fight not to be put at the bottom of waiting list for surgery as I’m already year behind due to negligence which is no fault of my own.
Thank you so much for this video! I am currently waiting for my 3rd appointment which is March 9th. Do you know how long you have to wait after your 3rd appointment to get hormones? This video has helped me alot and i think your great support to the trans community :)
+Thomas-Jay Baillie Thank you my friend. It really all depends on which clinic you are at. I was at the laurels so after my third therapist appointment I was then referred to the clinic doctor who has the final say on prescribing T. It was a 3 month wait when I was there. Once I saw the doctor and got the go ahead, it was then just a couple of weeks whilst I waited for them to send a letter to my doctor, and then to see my doctor for a prescription, and then a nurse appointment to stick it in my bum :) It certainly doesnt sound very long away for you my friend :)
+FinnTheInfinncible yeah I'm at Nottingham but I'm sure it's the same procedure. shouldn't be too long now just got to use time effectively like you said
+Thomas-Jay Baillie brilliant, lots of prep before hand helps the adjustment to puberty much easier!
I waited five years to get on T, I got through it by getting obsessed with TV series . I've been on T for about ten months now and now I'm waiting to get top surgery. It's April 16th.
I'm finding that waiting for that is ten times more difficult then anything I've experienced. It's so terrible. It's like the closer my date gets the worse my dsyphoria becomes? Yikes
There is a gender clinic in Ontario the province I live in Canada, but it is an hour away from me. I am on the waiting list right now for top surgery. I have to wait a year for an appointment there. I am thankful they have this in Ontario Canada. I didn't go there for my hormones though I went to a doctor closer to where I live and they got funding for the hormones, so I don't have to pay for that either.
+Casey Dietz I have a friend in Canada who has had to fight for years for all his medical treatment. His determination has finally paid off and he is now having first stage lower surgery. I hope that things continue to improve for everyone no matter where they live. I hope you hear soon my friend. Keep the faith!
I'm incredibly frustrated however, equally grateful and fortunate.
it's good to be both! if you can find gratitude then the frustration is much more bearable!
+FinnTheInfinncible maybe that's why I keep going! like you, I take each day at a time. Good days, bad... we all get them no matter situation/circumstance.
+Mark McAvoy absolutely my friend. best way to be!!!
I don't know how old this video is(UA-cam no longer shows when videos were uploaded) but as a non binary MTF person I got at least another 4 years to wait, already been waiting more than a year. The waiting times are so bad I have resorted to self medicating which is costing me a small fortune in having to import my meds from the other side of the world. No way am I waiting that long. By the time I am seen in my early to mid 50s I could be bald as a coot by then. I could be nearly 60 by the time I get GCS and that is on the optimist side.
To hear u say 6 months to a year is amazing, then I realized this was 5 years ago
Yes, things have got so incredibly long now and covid has just made it worse. I hope you are looking after yourself in the wait?
@@FinnTheInfinncible I haven't gotten on a list yet, I only asked my medical practise what options there are today
Well that's an amazing first step! If you ever need any help, pop me a message over on my website. finlaygames.com/contact-me/
my next appointment is not for 2 years :(( !!
I am so sorry my friend, the waiting lists at the moment are hellish. In my experience, there were a few things that helped me to manage the frustration of my wait and look after my mental health, I will share a blog with you that I wrote about this , perhaps it may be helpful. Thinking of you finlaygames.com/5-tips-coping-with-waiting-times-gender-transition/
You will make a fabulous therapist. Happy (almost) birthday. Do you have a P.O. Box?
+friendoftherese1 Bless you! thank you! I dont have a PO box, lots of people are asking me this...maybe i should. I am happy to give you my address... Ive had enough interaction with you to know you dont want to kill me ;)
LOL! You can rest easy---I certainly DON'T want to kill you! If you want to friend me on facebook, you can message me with your address. My facebook page is under Sparrow Rose, and I live in Indianapolis,Indiana, U.S.A. (if there are several Sparrow Roses)
Oh, and the picture on my homepage is of me and my granddaughter.
+friendoftherese1 found you 😊
Did you friend me? I have no friend requests yet.
Getting hrt and surgeries are not going to complete or give one a life. It helps with body and mind agree ment but take the time to build self worth, build relationships, take up hobbies, learn another language, travel, read large book series.
Sometimes the only cure impatience to be patient.
Pay for it yourself... What a waste of public taxes.. Disgusting.
Whooooooaaaattt??? You're 42?!?! No way! I thought you where much younger. You look very good for a (almost) 42 year old.
+Nelianne90 haha!! Yes I get that a lot! It is one of the bonuses of being a trans man and going through puberty late! Thanks so much for the compliment!