Victorian Etiquette Between Husbands and Wives

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  • Опубліковано 26 кві 2020
  • Victorian experts Gabriel and Sarah Chrisman read some tips on etiquette between husbands and wives from a 19th-century advice manual. If you love the Victorian era, be sure to look for Sarah's books on Amazon! www.amazon.com/Sarah%20A.%20C...

КОМЕНТАРІ • 70

  • @authoremileeharris1645
    @authoremileeharris1645 4 роки тому +153

    It's a shame etiquette books and guides have gone out of fashion, we so often see them in a negative light these days, but I think many marriages and relationships can be improved by these bits of advice. Thank you for sharing! PS: I've been a fan of yours for years since your corset book (I corset as well), but didn't realize you had this channel, so glad I found you!

    • @sofiabravo1994
      @sofiabravo1994 4 роки тому +15

      Author Emilee Harris because anything before 1960 is considered sexist 😒😒😒

    • @Black_pearl_adrift
      @Black_pearl_adrift 3 роки тому +6

      Oh I absolutely hope they make a comeback. While there is a robust discussion to be had on which values are the right ones to promote I think the concept of formal etiquette and proper manners would be a nice addition to our modern era

  • @pheart2381
    @pheart2381 4 роки тому +78

    I think films and sitcoms have trained us to view relationships as a continual Battle of the Sexes!! One always seems to be trying to dominate the other,rather than trying to be equal.

    • @maybelater2160
      @maybelater2160 4 роки тому +14

      Honestly, it's not the sitcom's fault people have always been cruel to the opposite sex and there have always been people like the author of this book who knew that a relationship shouldn't be like that. If we look at history, human mentality really doesn't change much. That's sad sometimes.

    • @AliciaB.
      @AliciaB. 4 роки тому +15

      I think the toxic dynamic is to aim for equality, in the sense of sameness, rather than equity, which allows for understanding and celebration of difference

    • @maybelater2160
      @maybelater2160 4 роки тому +8

      @@AliciaB. This is what equality means. Many people misrepresent it, but equality does not mean and has never meant being the same, just equal.

    • @sofiabravo1994
      @sofiabravo1994 4 роки тому +3

      OliwiaTheAutodestructive equal in value but we have different needs and speak a different language.

    • @Hugin-N-Munin
      @Hugin-N-Munin 3 роки тому +1

      I think it's a conflict of accuracy vs drama. Drama always wins in media

  • @cecilyerker
    @cecilyerker 4 роки тому +67

    I feel like this advice is useful in any era and I also like that it emphasises the joint responsibility of both the husband and wife and reminds them that they're on the same team, it's definitely better than the baby boomer "I hate my wife" jokes. It's not like Victorian people didn't have the same marriage problems we do today, but I feel like the advice then was better and more supportive of the young couple.

    • @sofiabravo1994
      @sofiabravo1994 4 роки тому +9

      Cecily Erker society treats people as disposable...the second said boyfriend shows a flaw “oH heS tOxiC mUsT bReAk Up” And men and women wonder why they can’t ever find that person

  • @laurenloertscher1319
    @laurenloertscher1319 4 роки тому +107

    I like how it shows men and women as different, and how that is a strength in developing goodness in one another. Patience and kindness people, patience and kindness and balance :)

  • @WackyWitchTV
    @WackyWitchTV Рік тому +2

    God, I miss this time!

  • @belladrewstarkey4369
    @belladrewstarkey4369 3 роки тому +6

    1:58 is my favorite! No matter what century you are in always have a lovely good bye!!

    • @mabel8179
      @mabel8179 2 роки тому

      Wasn't that just so adorable! It is something to think about.

  • @maham2206
    @maham2206 4 роки тому +51

    They are so cute 😭❤ I Just love them!

  • @cordiscoscorner
    @cordiscoscorner 4 роки тому +34

    You're going to get some grief but TOO BAD. As a divorced man I think if I took to heart some of what you said I'd still be married. The short version of marriage etiquette...GROW UP !!!!!! Hope you guys are well. The first three books in your series is coming in two days. Be well.

  • @MrsBee-uo2lc
    @MrsBee-uo2lc 4 роки тому +26

    perfect timing as I'm sure many husbands and wives should be working on their etiquette with one another being that we have to be together 24/7 now 😂😂👍

  • @mabel8179
    @mabel8179 2 роки тому +2

    I couldn't fault any of that advice- it was lovely and based on kindness and respect.

  • @SkylarGold
    @SkylarGold Рік тому +1

    I remember watching this video a year or two ago and I couldn't find it for the life of me until today. Such a lovely presentation and sentiment.

  • @mastersadvocate
    @mastersadvocate 4 роки тому +10

    A very enjoyable video, indeed! Gabriel and Sarah Chrisman are a lovely couple! The Victorian Etiquette between husbands and wives should be revived for today's married couples! It might help both newly weds, and older married couples. Couldn't hurt, eh? ~Janet in Canada

  • @karen4you
    @karen4you 4 роки тому +23

    This was such sound advice even in this day. It seems civil behavior has been lost by some. I saved up and bought one of your kindle books, very much enjoying it.

    • @ESCAPINGTHEMATRIXFORGOOD
      @ESCAPINGTHEMATRIXFORGOOD 4 роки тому +1

      hello Karen i see you love this channel as well, great channel, i love the past ! hope all is well at your end, stay safe and take good care

  • @SnowBall-hz6pu
    @SnowBall-hz6pu 3 роки тому +7

    Hi Sarah, I'm curious, how did you guys meet? I would love to see a video and have you explain how you two came to be together especially since you both love the Victorian era and love living in a historical way of life...it's like you were meant to be. ❤

  • @DansonforJoy
    @DansonforJoy 4 роки тому +20

    This video was absolutely delightful! It made me almost teary-eyed, grateful to recognize so many of the guidelines for husbands are performed habitually by my own husband. 💗 I recognized a couple points I can brush up on, myself. 😉 Books like this are priceless! I just added it to my Amazon cart, and look forward to reading more. 😁 -Jesse Danson (Skagit Valley)

  • @monnicamarie
    @monnicamarie 4 роки тому +6

    Absolutely beautiful. This needs to be followed. Women of course work now days, but the simple principles of respect work. A marriage of two=one love.

    • @sofiabravo1994
      @sofiabravo1994 4 роки тому +3

      monnicamarie a marriage= one flesh 🥰

    • @AFatherToTheFatherless
      @AFatherToTheFatherless 2 роки тому +1

      A woman that wants to become a wife shouldn't focus on a career. If she wants to remain single though then she must focus on a career

    • @tymanung6382
      @tymanung6382 Рік тому

      Victorian era professional, landowner,
      and capitalist classes women generally
      did not work. but majority of workers of various sorts had no choice but factory,
      domestic, farm etc. both women & men.

  • @1minigrem
    @1minigrem 4 роки тому +15

    That was simply lovely, we could do with re introducing this wisdom into our lives.

  • @jameswarrick778
    @jameswarrick778 4 роки тому +15

    This actually pretty wonderful, I shared this video with my girlfriend. 😁

  • @grumbeard
    @grumbeard 3 роки тому +2

    I really love these two. Sarah looks really cute and Gabriel often looks quite dapper. You do what you do and please keep sharing, we enjoy it a lot.

  • @teppizini
    @teppizini 4 роки тому +9

    Beautiful advice. I wish more people would heed it.

  • @jrpacer6355
    @jrpacer6355 3 роки тому +4

    This would be a great wedding gift

  • @asiyaheibhlin
    @asiyaheibhlin 3 роки тому +2

    I have read a great deal of the sample of this on kindle, but I just purchased the actual book. I love how the duties stated in the book are almost *completely* in keeping with Islamic duties between spouses.
    It makes me feel great that I can merge my life-long passion for Victorian ettiquette with my new religion and its decrees.
    The best of both worlds in my opinion. Acting upon them is something that would take a lot of practice, but I am sure they make things more smooth than what they would otherwise be without such guidance.
    You guys are amazing.

  • @eiryamorlais4978
    @eiryamorlais4978 Рік тому

    This was lovely. Elevating to hear. I would wish all of this for all humans - 9f every socioeconomic 'class.' As Sarah did not find a corset dehumanizing, neither do I find these precepts for both (shall just say 'both'!) sexes to be so. I am certain, as a 63 y/o woman, that I am not the only one to feel that I missed out on formerly sanctioned aspects of womanhood. Further, I recognize/acknowledge that I would have been a better woman/person, had such volumes/teachings been readily available during more recent eras. The two of you share so much of worth - thank you.

  • @carrie.m
    @carrie.m 4 роки тому +8

    You guys are so lovely! I am obsessed with etiquette books but I've never read one focused on married couples, its so interesting how small details are highlighted so much!

  • @natalieatkinson8602
    @natalieatkinson8602 3 роки тому +1

    Those are such wonderful pieces of advice! I'm a wife myself and a couple of those pieces of advice I thought "Oops I do that . . . gotta stop". I agree with the lady below. I think that marriages would definitely improve with these types of advice. I didn't find any of it sexist, quite the contrary. It puts a wife and husband into roles not gender inequalities that can be follow amicably. Thankyou for sharing!

  • @lucienneferbona4567
    @lucienneferbona4567 4 роки тому +2

    My copy of "A bouquet of Victorian roses" just arrived today in Edinburgh. I am very excited!

  • @williamjones1602
    @williamjones1602 4 роки тому +8

    recently bought your book: Words for Parting; can't wait to read it!

  • @kyrak.4143
    @kyrak.4143 Рік тому +4

    Girl how did you bag that hot chap?

  • @ruthgoebel723
    @ruthgoebel723 4 роки тому +18

    I wish etiquette of all types was more emphasized in our society today. We have become so casual, there is little respect left. Men and women are different, for each have different roles and responsibilities. Thank you for this!

  • @curedollyyy
    @curedollyyy 4 роки тому +4

    ❤️❤️❤️Lots of advice applies to this day :) thanks for this! I love that you are uploading more videos right now. Would love to see more baking videos, I just love your channel! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @tiburcio43
    @tiburcio43 2 роки тому

    Much better than I expected.

  • @ronaldgundrum2174
    @ronaldgundrum2174 Рік тому +1

    A wonderful couple. 👫

  • @bluefox7678
    @bluefox7678 3 роки тому +2

    Woah. I thought that It would be a bunch of rediculous rules but that...
    was beautiful! I am just a kid but I'll hang onto that advice, I may need it. Haha

  • @REMNANTRising2005
    @REMNANTRising2005 Рік тому

    I absolutely love the Victoria era

  • @ARCHEROO78
    @ARCHEROO78 4 роки тому +3

    Lovely ! Thank you

  • @t.j.johnsonthewriter
    @t.j.johnsonthewriter 2 роки тому

    Great! I've always loved dressing victorian to early 1900's. In the past three years I've turned my whole life into one victorian paradise. I live in endglad so getting hold of a victorian terrace house is quite easy. I also love engineering and trains, so I've started working in the past year as an engineer and driver at a heritage railway near me originally built in 1859. It's in the middle of nowhere so its just us all dressed as victorian workers sitting in a small village pub as steam trains roll by as well as traction engines and hansom carriages. Hope you're loving life too.

  • @gillianpetrie9771
    @gillianpetrie9771 3 роки тому +2

    Love these Biblical values. Ephesians 5: 22-25. ; 33

  • @woollyprimate
    @woollyprimate 2 роки тому +1

    I'll admit it : I was fully prepared to be offended at the advice. Boy was I pleasantly surprised. There was absolutely NOTHING untoward about any of it. It was marvelous advice and surprisingly modern.

  • @slouallen3832
    @slouallen3832 4 роки тому +3

    so cool! thank y’all!

  • @Happyday0974
    @Happyday0974 4 роки тому +2

    Awesome guys..love u😍

  • @albertomaldonado1015
    @albertomaldonado1015 4 роки тому +4

    Great

  • @godblessamerica3247
    @godblessamerica3247 2 роки тому

    All good advice.

  • @roselinenganga5625
    @roselinenganga5625 3 роки тому +1

    Amazing

  • @MelissaBaker.
    @MelissaBaker. 4 роки тому +3

    Wisdom words! It was really interesting to see you both help each other load the ice box, I've always wanted to see what format was the ice you had available since I've read your book a victorian life!

  • @196Jonesy
    @196Jonesy 2 роки тому +1

    omaword ya'll are so cute!

  • @muayadalhariri4933
    @muayadalhariri4933 4 роки тому +3

    Hey Mrs.Sarah may I please ask to give us a tour of your beautiful house please?

  • @booklover2404
    @booklover2404 3 роки тому +2

    OMG. If every married couple read this book there would be no divorces.

  • @Jennifer.villezcas
    @Jennifer.villezcas 4 роки тому +3

    How beautiful 😍

  • @jf2388
    @jf2388 4 роки тому +2

    Can someone writte down whats the name of the book of ettiquetes? English is not my mother language, I didnt understand
    Btw loved the video

    • @Rosepaku
      @Rosepaku 4 роки тому +3

      J F true ladies and proper gentlemen by Sarah chrisman 😊

  • @toniivanova4706
    @toniivanova4706 4 роки тому

    From where do you buy your clothes ?

  • @themonkman
    @themonkman 3 роки тому +1

    Hi there, you might like to know that part of your video features in this Goodrow Productions non-commercial film of A Christmas Carol (ua-cam.com/video/Trr37Okat08/v-deo.html). Thanks so much. Your film features at 4min 19seconds.

  • @REMNANTRising2005
    @REMNANTRising2005 Рік тому

    She looks older than her husband 😅