My brother idolised Hemingway etc and became a heavy drinker due to their romantic view of boozing (Orwell's "Down and Out in Paris and London was a favourite of his) whilst also trying to cope with early life trauma (we didn't have the best childhood).. He's currently in his 6th week in intensive care (one week in an induced coma) and had two life saving operations. He's 36. There's no glamour in alcoholism. It's only a downward spiral. *Edit. He died in the small hours of this morning (2 days before my birthday) by being administered with morpheme as his liver couldn't be stabilised. Such a waste of potential. It's been devastating for my Mum - there's just me and her left of our family in the UK, and only a few left in Sweden/her country of birth. I also lost my Aunt 4 days after my brother followed by my other aunt and a cousin a few weeks later. My father died 99 days after my brother, the day after Burns Night (he was Scottish).
I know how empty the words are, but my sincerest sympathies and condolences to you and your family. For me, quitting cocaine was easy by comparison (not to say it was "easy") drinking has a grip that is incredibly hard to get free of. May he find peace
Thanks for the condolences. Not what I wished to happen, but let it serve as a lesson and I hope it helps you or others you know and love that there is an alternative to drinking. It just needs to be found.
I never realized why people drink until the mess that was 2020. I only drank for entertainment before but recently I see the massive reduction in stress it temporarily brings. From paralyzed with anxiety to "functioning". I'm laying off the bottle but I have more sympathy for alcoholics now
It's a crutch. It can help you get there, but doesn't mean anything is healthy or fine. ( I had to give it up too, but yeah. It definitely gave me a different perspective about addiction)
I did the Meetings and all, but they were face to face for me years ago and a lot of it now is, ugh, Zoom. Still gave me such a foundation in 06 that march 2020-present didn't make me do opioids or drink. Its prob cause I know Im certainly a dead man if I do, I wont stop, I cant, and I really like my life now. Back in 05 death didn't scare me. Waking up did.
I guess I learned that thru 2003-05 with all the relapsing and shit. "One more night get it out of my system" becomes a year unable to stop at ALL. Lather, rinse, repeat. AS many times as it took to be in a place worse then death. THEN wisdom and doing whatever the meeting people said to do.
@@VeganSemihCyprus33 addiction is caused by the intake of a substance repeatedly, and then the brain getting used to the drug and starting to expect it to maintain homeostasis
Yeah same here. Just went out rather heavily drinking last night due to being frustrated by life in general, but also for admittedly masochistic reasons. I think after how dumb I feel today and this video I’m definitely going to at the very least heavily regulate my drinking from now on.
I feel like a lot of the perception of Hemmingway doesn't come from his books because in at least the ones I've read the main character always has a deep sadness that is constantly hovering over their shoulder. I was attracted to Hemmingway because of how I could relate to the characters that were suffering through things and would only allow their feelings to escape in short bursts where they might go crazy until they could once again control it. It's hard to say that those characters have any hope for the future they just continue on because they don't really have much else to do. I kinda thought that Hemmingway was just like those characters, hopeless and suppressing his real emotions. I also can't recall any of his books that I've read having a happy ending. Either most haven't read his books or my interpretation was just different than most.
It always amazed me how all his characters felt like real people. They all felt like people I know / knew. The problems they faced always seems to relatable. I get tough bouts of depression that can be maddening. It was relatable and enjoyable to read his work as I think he poured his soul into it. And I really appreciate that. I think thats what makes me enjoy his writing so much. Thanks for sharing. Great comment
Most if not all of his stories are based on real adventures he went on, and it shows. The thing I love about his books are the realistic human elements that come with real life grand adventures; the dramatic messiness that arises in an attempt to live out a romantic vision. It keeps the story simultaneously relatable and unpredictable. Definitely one of my favorite authors.
Hemingway is a rare ISTP author the type is known for problems with melancholy and addiction there are many examples in movies generally playing the anti hero role 50 or so examples are contained within 👉ua-cam.com/video/gOHuk_MKluA/v-deo.html👈
I’m a combat veteran. Specifically, a former Infantryman. Soldier’s Home had a profound impact upon me when I read it. You live life afterwards numb. If something, anything, makes you feel something, you keep doing it. I don’t know what he was carrying around, maybe it was his WWI experience. Hemmingway didn’t care about anyone. Just like Krebs didn’t care about his mother. But you can only stay ahead of that for so long. Either you deal with it, or it ends you. I think that played a large part in what ended him.
My brother drank himself to death. He was only 56. He had alcohol problems from a young age. He was never at peace. His last days where lonely and sad. It was 5 months ago now. I cry as i write this. I am sorry Phil. I hope you are at peace.
@@chriscoralAloha Yes, Christmas is an especially sad time for those who have lost a family member, especially as this is your first Christmas without your brother. I would love to think that Phil is, indeed, at peace. You may like to call Friendline 1800 4 CHATS. I hope that you can find some calmness over Christmas and that the New Year goes well for you.
This video really helped me better understand how I view the relationship that people around me (and myself) have with mental well-being and substance abuse. It has this strange mixture of emotional response and better understanding that I can't say I usually get watching youtube videos. there are so many great points to take away from this, even re-watching it a few times really reinforced ideas I had missed watching it the first time. I really love the direction you are taking with this channel and I really excited for more of it.
As one who has quit and relapsed countless times - before getting sober nine years ago - I can say that quitting drink invariably involves a prolonged period of pretty severe depression at the outset. It is this depression which drives many to relapse, thinking: "If this is sobriety, it's not worth trouble; I'd rather keep dealing with jails, institutions, and likely death." Getting through this initial depressed phase (from 6 months to several years) is a major key to reaching long-term sobriety. Twelve-step programs helped me, and ultimately, it was reaching a point where the alcohol had physiologically stopped working (couldn't get any euphoria from it; only stupefaction and havoc upon the innards) which prompted the final renunciation. Hemingway couldn't stick it out through this period, which makes sense given his diminished powers of mentation - which killed his ability to write. Having goals helps immeasurably in early sobriety; he knew he'd lost all power to reach his goals.
This hits home for me man. Living with depression, it feels like you have a hangover whether you drink or not, so why not drink? You're the same mess of a human each morning after 0 drinks or 10. It takes a while to realize that it's worth it to quit, it feels too good forgetting about everything all day. But it does come crashing down eventually. I had acute pancreatitis finally stop my drinking thankfully, without much permanent damage to my body, but if I could've drank myself to death painlessly I might have. Still in the darkness, but I know it's a lot darker at the bottom of the bottle.
This hits terrifyingly deep to me. I've been a self destructive alcoholic since I was 15, struggling with severe mental illness for years, BPD, Bipolar, etc. Mood swings, feelings of inadequacy, unstable relationships, feeling like your living a nightmare. (I also occasionally write, though not even slightly as well as Hemingway.) Every day is a struggle, and I drowned myself in alcohol to cope. I would be so desperate as to make my own in my closet wine I was younger. Alcohol does nothing but amplifies the misery, but you feel so numb as to no longer care if you live or die. It takes away the filter, the restraint, and you unleash all your pain and frustration. This makes it so alluring, and yet so dangerous. Only this year have I attempted to get sober, in August I was in serious danger of dying from combined drinking and self harm. I've failed 3 times now, but I'm still trying. It's so tempting, but will only seal my fate.
What you need to do is stop the drinking and spend your time doing other shit, and build routines around doing those things sort of like you do with drinking. I started at 14 and stopped at 27 (I will drink a now barely enjoyable beer with a meal maybe once a month). Make sure you have multiple new hobbies to be doing so you don’t become unhealthily obsessed with one (I was becoming too obsessed with the gym). Plenty of things to get into, even technical stuff lol .. buy an old computer online for $50 and look up videos on how to tinker around .. stuff like that. Just started making these changes around the new year and I feel like a new person entirely, not even in a manic way. My overall happier energy and diminishing beer gut/puffy beer face is also getting me more attention from women. It’s very tough in the beginning, and a lot of realizations to your numbness will arise, but you take it in stride and soon enough each day starts to feel better, falling together like dominos. Good luck to you
I feel the same my answers for now are : Work out, take boxing classes or some other intense sport , travel, go hiking, fuck more, ride your car.. Bascis activities that we all forget about but are kinda quintessential to feeling alive. If this stuff doesn't work man you gotta try harder in finding enjoyable stuff..
Most addicts are also in a depression. The depression is caused often by unressolved trauma. The addiction creates a short term illusjon that it « helps» against anxiety/depression/pain, but reality is that it makes them grow and also creates it. See a therapist asap, and focus on having regular sleep, eat healthy, exercise, and DON’T isolate your self!. You are gonna be ok!
it takes practice. you'll get there, keep goin. they say look at the positives. what they dont say is you gotta look at the positives every day on purpose for like a year or two before your brain is trained to do it naturally, or before it really even helps much. but once you get there, it's a lot easier. we're normally sensitive to the negatives, we have to force ourselves to see the good stuff, and practice it.
Wow, great video. I’m only 37 but have been drinking daily for at least the last 7 years. Never had anything life altering in a negative way happen due to alcohol and as far as I know I’m still in good health, but I feel like it’s time to stop or at least significantly cut back. Just becoming more & more dependent and my tolerance is thru the roof. Supposed to see a psych next week, optimistic for what the future may hold.
As a major Hemingway and Sysiphus fan for years, well done. There is much contained in Ernest's writing and protagonists that exude precisely your thoughts; the core revolving around responsibility being the counterpoint to a daily escape from it. Keep up the absolutely excellent work. I would absolutely love to see a similar jaunt into Kurt Vonnegut's life, writing, and philosophy from you.
Jesus, nobody gets how important it was for the work. Funny how everyone compared their drinking to the drinking of a genius and the part it plays in the process…
I'm not addicted to alcohol, but after watching this video I've made the decision to pour out the rest of what I have in the house. It's horrifying the power alcohol could have over me, and I'm watching this after a night of binge drinking. My grocery list of mental health issues aside, I don't want to put my parents or any of my loved ones through having to deal with my addiction. Hell, I'd be disappointed in myself if I went down that road. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for making this video.
MUCH RESPECT, sir... from someone whose father did just what you are doing and became the greatest family man ever after his recovery. Stay the course... you cannot imagine yet how difference and good life can be on the other side, in the light...
If you're thinking about alcohol and pouring it out. You're probably an Alcoholic. Just my opinion, with years of addiction/recovery, under my belt. Good luck, hope you choose a good path.
I recently quit drinking. I come from a culture of alcoholics and a family of particularly serious alcoholics. the absolute ruthlessness of my anxieties and depression and trauma are literally crashing down on me at all times. I want nothing more than to have a drink and crawl back into platos cave. thanks for making this video and getting me through one more day.
I have sat for hours trying to figure out how to answer this. Better isn't an accurate word. So let's go back to the cave analogy. Lets imagine the entrance to the cave is behind a huge crashing waterfall of depression and trauma and all that shit. Every day when you have to leave the cave the waterfall beats you the fuck down and you barely make it out. But you have to leave. Can't just starve in the cave. And so you get beat the fuck up day after day and barely make it out. Then one day you bend your knees a certain way and time it out just right and you pop out the other side and only take half the beating. I haven't bent my knee right yet, but I think it's possible. So better? No. The waterfall doesn't change. It doesn't get better. But after all the beatings I think i can figure it out. I hope some of that makes sense lol
For the longest time I was a genuine substance abuser. My drug of choice is marijuana, for so long I told myself I would quit and never did it. Now I’m fully sober even quitting nicotine. It’s still incredibly hard tho, so many people around me still use it. And so many relationships were built upon it. I love the metaphor of the people in the cave, it fully encapsulates the feelings I have. It’s hard tho because I want the people around me to quit as well, but it’s impossible to show them the truth so I no longer try. Some people may say that marijuana is not a drug, and if that’s what you think then you obviously don’t understand it’s implications. Just like anything else it allows you to avoid your problems, it allows you to hide them behind a wall of smoke. It draws you in with its intense feelings of euphoria and keeps you there with the social anxiety it brings you. In my case it made me isolate, for the longest time I searched for why my personality had seemingly changed. I was in denial of the truth, I still don’t feel “normal” yet. But it takes time. Thank you for this wonderful video
Hello my friend. I quit 20 years of tobacco in 2008 and weed and alcohol on July 9, 2013. I am 56 years old now and clean abd sober 9 years. I am in great shape and a better person. I recently started a new relationship with a beautiful woman my age who is also clean and sober (25 yeara) and very fit. I am now living in the moment and grateful for all of the gifts given to me. Peace, my friend.
Cannabis can be an awful thing if it becomes your life, but you must count yourself lucky to have a choice of drug so relatively easy to get off of. I had a period of doing too much THC, and the problem with it is demotivation and simply, it stops working. What if you were using something that actually did deeply change your feelings, that really could have the power to make everything feel perfect and lovely, in a way that weed could never do, chemically? You may say "Oh, weed did that for me!" but no, I'm talking about units of dopamine. I think cannabis can increase dopamine units to about "50" (unsure of their measurements, but getting this from scientific papers) whereas heroin was "600" and meth was "1100". Now, personal preference still shows here, as lots of people have preference to, say, opioids over meth, due to the nature of the high, even though meth is supposedly giving you a higher level of dopamine. So, to a small extent, if you are the perfect person to become addicted to cannabis, you could bump that number up to "100". Still, count yourself lucky.
Not into weed. When I was a kid my dad said quitting THC wasn't easy, because of the emotional dependence. He also said that it took about 12 months, then his brain somehow changed, changed back to normal healthy thinking. I heard this experience and knew I didn't need it in my life, powerful stuff to tell a kid, and damn it was effective.
I had a similar rekindling of my appreciation for Hemingway. When I first had to read "Old Man and the Sea" in high school, I didn't enjoy it and thought it was boring. I picked up "Farewell to Arms" later on and loved the tragedy of it. My ideas around masculinity changed and I saw a lot of the ideals shown in that book as counterproductive because, really, they are. Hemingway changed for me again when I read his biography and other works on his life. His books changed again for me too and he became this deeply tragic figure, obviously trying to create a hyperbolized version of himself in his books where he always comes away emotionally unscathed and resilient, because in real life, he couldn't do that. It makes all of his works better not because of the ideas they espouse but because of the truth and the fear that is behind them. His books still find a new way to break my heart after all this time. Edit: I know it's unlikely people will read this full comment, but I feel like I'm on a roll, so this is really just for me to get my thoughts out. As brilliant as I think Hemingway is, I can't help but imagine what his works could've been if he was able to be honest with himself and with his readership. To put those fears of rejection, inadequacy, and annihilation into words could've helped so many people suffering in the same silent way. Makes it all the more tragic, in my opinion.
I really enjoy the overall tragedy of most of his work. The bittersweet nature of it all. Bittersweet is a word used over and over to describe his work but it really hits home. In many ways he was deeply in tune with the tragedies of life, including his own. Thank you for the thought provoking comment.
excellent comment, but I respectfully disagree. Hemingway's mental illness was one of the main "enablers" of his genius. Without this mental trauma, he would likely have never attained the great heights that he did. It is not a coincidence that many of the greatest writers have had serious mental issues.
All people hold this duality. He’s not good or bad, truth or liar, masculine or damaged, just a person. When we learn how to move beyond labels they lose there meaning, that’s a true virtue. Psychology and science are a stepping stone not the reality.
Videos such as these are greatly needed on UA-cam: those that deal with serious problems of people in a properly sensitive, practical, simple, and caring way. Keep up the good work.
Addiction is the worst and most tiresome $hit that's ever happened to me. And the crazy part is that even though I've been heavily addicted to amphetamine, opiods and benzodiazepines for about 25 years I just find something else to abuse. All the time. Now I'm 50 and don't touch anything heavy but I live in Thailand since 8-9 years and now I'm addicted to something I didn't even know existed 10 years ago. Kratom. It's not like heroin or speed in any way, but still an addiction. What baffles me the most is the fact that when I have been clean for a, relatively speaking, long time, I'm at it again. Just another substance. So tired of me, myself and my life as an idiot
You are certainly not alone - I think there are deep issues that can cause addictive behavior, and it can be all but impossible to really solve the deeper issues, but I think it's worth trying.
As a long recovering alkie I found that the addiction will always be with me. I have utilized it to find a healthy or productive addiction that replaces my destructive affliction. Helping others with their problems get me out of myself, biking, fishing, woodworking, whatever it is, if it’s positive that is the direction to pursue. I also know that change will only come from within. There is no one or event that has the power to compel an alcoholic mind to stop other than themselves. Although the compulsion for alcohol has left me I must remain mindful of where my addictive personality will lead me. Good luck to all seeking answers
@@Jaegov That resonates with me - if I get into something, I usually really get into it. When I got into chess, I became pretty darn good at chess, because I was borderline-obsessive. But the same character traits that can help a person excel can also help a person destroy himself.
Honestly you never think you’re an alcoholic or an addict until clinically deemed one. After I got sent to rehab for alcoholism I saw so many red flags and indicators. I’m glad I watched this video again. It just makes me realize I’m not alone. It crazy that not everyone goes through this as well. I’m glad this brings substance abuse to light.
Recently watched that Ken Burns documentary on Hemingway with my dad & this video adds some really valuable colour. Alcoholism runs in my family. I also struggled with it since I moved out at 16... Hemingway makes me want to get better and live long enough to find peace.
Hope that you find some peace and that you also find interest in the non-peaceful times as you try to be honest with yourself and also caring towards yourself and others.
Seeing someone struggling with alcoholism is extremely painful. Recently, I almost ruined myself trying to be there for someone, who I loved very much, who couldn't even be there for himself because of his drinking. To see the very essence of who someone is, slowly deteriorate before your eyes and no matter how hard you try to help them in the end, there's no way you can pull them out of that hell unless they are willing to do something to help themselves. He was the one who broke things off with me, once he realized that it was a journey that he would have to embark on on his own. He realized how badly his drinking was hurting me before even I did. Many sleepless nights of hospital visits where the nurses would warn him that he had the possibility of dying from withdrawl. I probably would have ended up ruining my own mental health trying to stay with him and help him through his demons before I would have decided to cut things off to save myself. Ultimately, he did me a great kindness by insisting that he try to work through it on his own, so that he wouldn't end up dragging me down with him. It just hurts so much when you know that they are an amazing person, with a cruel cruel addiction sucking the life out of them like a parasite. Needless to say, I hate alcohol and I hate how it is capable of completely ruining the life of someone you care about so deeply. The nights are still sleepless, because I've spent the past several months since our relationship ended, praying to the universe that he doesn't end up drinking so much that he won't be able to recover. The thought haunts me, and it's even more painful still that there is just nothing that I can do for him, even as his friend. It's just not fair.
If he joins a recovery program with other alcoholics he stands a better chance of recovery than on his own. The beginning can be tough but he can get there if he wants it. Take care.
There is no reason to hate alcohol. He would have found another addiction escape with. He would have had the same problem with someone else. He probably had some form of abandonment or neglect in his life.
I have a friend who keeps failing to get their act together and I find myself getting tossed back and forth between the exhaustion of trying to carry them and the guilt of not doing enough. But we can't change the way that others act. We can only change the way we react. Strength and patience to you, friend.
My alcoholism destroyed everything I loved. I don't believe alcohol is evil it's just evil for me. I'm alcohol intolerant, like lactose intolerant, except instead of having bowel trouble , I shit on everything I care about, loose jobs and end up homeless. Needless to say after 20yrs I finally figured it out. However, I'm positive I hurt good friends that only wanted to help and genuinely cared. There is nothing you can do , the individual has to do it themselves. I'm so sorry you had to watch your friend basically dissolve in front of you. I cried out to a Jesus Christ on my last 7day liquor bender. I'm sober now. Still coming to terms with the wreckage and broken relationships I destroyed. It makes me physically sick to think of all I did.. I pray I never forget.
Strafe, there is absolutely every need to abhor, detest and hate alcohol. You do not know anything about addiction - you're either very green and young or in denial because you, yourself, like it. It is among the most harmful substances for people to imbibe. It is the greatest eraser of all time. It erases your money, your friends, your possessions, your house, your self respect and finally, your sanity. I know, I am a recovering alcoholic.
One of my shrinks told me that I was going to wind up like Hemingway. I kinda look forward to it. Your video is giving me a headache, but I'll give you a thumbs up on the way out.
I just wanna point out that while genes do have a factor in mental illness, they are not by any means the only/most important one. I just don’t want people out there to feel like their fate is already written and that they don’t have any power to manage symptoms and live with wellness
I don't totally agree.. I do believe that genes have a strong impact on our behaviors, in fact my genes are telling me to ask for your IG, if this isn't fate I don't know what it is..
@@killexpert5095 haha I totally feel the same way. It's like those games where u can tweak the difficulty in specific ways (like enemy damage, your own HP, item drops, eg). Some got it easy, some got it tough as fudge
Well yeah no but still you can't say that your point is right. The brain is insanely complex and to argue that you know what exactly cause certain changes in how the brain functions is stupid. Your genes might be the reason and what of it? Why does it matter since you are not made by what you're given but what you make of it.
I would love to see a similar examination of Hunter S. Thompson. Hemingway was a symbol of true, reckless masculinity for me ever since I read The Old Man and the Sea in my tween years, but his space within my consciousness was basically entirely supplanted by Thompson once I became I teen. He seems to me in many ways the things that Hemingway purported to be: a force of nature utterly unconcerned with social convention while retaining a certain guiding self-consciousness. I’m particularly fascinated with the Thompson of Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail of ‘72, as in many ways it feels to me like his most “honest” work, as much as one can hope to glean honesty from an author whose entire career and style is built around the willful blurring of lines between reality and fantasy.
There's this Hunter S. Thompson bit with a late show host, I think Conan. Hunter takes the host shooting guns. They use Hunter's picture, his books, and a full size cardboard cutout of Hunter as the targets. Hunter sawing a cardboard caricature of himself in half with an M60... I don't know why, but I always felt like that kind of summed up who Hunter was.
I admire the courage of men who volunteer to help in bushfires and floods. They are wonderful. However, I also want them to look after themselves and not damage their livers with heavy drinking. We need them to be alive, not dead. Thank you, brave men.
Very well-produced video, accurate, well-researched, and the writing is straightforward, the presentation refreshingly lacking in sensationalism. I took my first drink at 14. It felt like a miracle. A kind of temporary, subjectively perfect freedom; from pain, from the terrible weight of being oneself. Bliss. It was only a couple of years before I was hiding alcohol around the house and even the neighbourhood. As an adult, I lost everything. Right down to my teeth. Zizek is absolutely right on Thankfully, I got so ill, so desperate and bored by drink and drugs, it became clear that I had to quit or die. Haven't taken a drink in twenty years. It's not over tho, I know I'm always a bad day away from a rapid return to self-destruction. I think the drink and drugs quit me, not the other way around. Let's hope they don't regain an interest in my life...
Recovery is Recovery. Like a person who may never walk agian, so is our addiction. But I draw inspiration from people in physical therapy, pushing and pulling through pain, its amazing to me, and they have people cheering them on, and its this type of love that most addicts need to get and stay clean, in our addiction somthing is crippled, like wings, but if we work our recovery we get better.
I believe the emptiness and the helpless feeling this unfeeling world can often make people feel . Meditation and self awareness a great help.i wish love and strength to all🤗
My father is alcoholic and also had BED, and has shown signs of possible bipolar for years. His eating disorder led to him becoming obese and then doing the by-ass surgery to lose weight, and then his smoking and drinking got worse. He kicked smoking and then primarily drank, putting everyone's lives at risk. His father was also an alcoholic. My mother has ADHD, which I inherited along with autism. All of that plus the fact both parents were abusive to me growing up, made me develop pretty much all shapes of addiction for different reasons. Chemical given my brain does not produce enough dopamine on its own and substances pose as a low hanging fruit to satiate such absence, and because of a need to create an illusion of regulation. Restraint and abandon back and forth.
The stigma on addiction is very strong. Addicts are perceived as weak and lazy without knowing the cause of addiction or knowing about the person better. I was one of the people who thinks the same way before, but when I became an addict myself, it gave me a very different view. At first, I thought I was just enjoying it, and that I just became weak and dropped my guard. But my therapist helped me find the root cause of my addiction and we did steps to overcome it. Surprizingly, the steps we did was not directly about the substance and it's negative effects on the body. It's rarely even discussed, and when it is part of the topic, my therapist would just go through it with a rushed and nonchalant tone. What we concentrated more would be on what I feel during those moments when I was under the influence, why I hang on it too much, and what are the other activities that would give me the same feeling. This actually helped me better than what my friends would do by stating all the scary effects of the substance to my body. I was almost on the stage of self destruction, so those scary stuff won't really affect me. I'm a lot better now but still with my therapist, and when I see a fellow addict (with whatever substance or activity), I now see them as a fellow beings, who are troubled and who needs help. I don't think we have enough effort on educating people about addiction here in my country, and I believe that's one of the best step to actually overcome it.
Very true, and not only are addicts perceived as weak and lazy, but they are perceived that way by other addicts. I once saw a guy smack a glass pipe out of his nephew's mouth while the guy was drunk, because marijuana bad, m'kay? Apparently getting drunk and committing assault on one's nephew is totally OK, but smoking weed is horrible. In my opinion, the nephew had a serious alcohol problem, and the uncle was drinking with him. Then you have the anti-depressant crowd, pretending like the drugs they take aren't addictive, when they most certainly are. Anyway, I agree 100% that the root causes of addiction are deep, and I also believe that almost everyone in America is an addict in one way or the next, even though people love to throw stones from their glass houses.
I used the title of his unfinished trilogy, the sea book, for a group of sketchbooks I've stuffed with poetry because I felt a deep connection to the pain of his characters and his struggle with alcoholism. I'm terrified of alcohol because I'm surrounded by addicts who try to numb pain just like he did, and genetically I'm doomed if I ever start drinking. Part of the reason I stay sober is him, and that sounds kind of goofy, but it works
I admire your commitment to avoiding alcohol. It is literally a poison! I hope you keep on choosing good health, and that you keep on writing poetry and being creative and healthy.
As someone who smokes weed and is in a lull of getting therapy. I started because during that time my mom was in a toxic relationship after being in one and I did it to keep myself stable. I remember my first time trying a dab pen and being on VRChat tripping and it was awesome. But as someone who works min wage I would have to wait until I had a good check and would get some weed. But I remember one time I was sober and I had a mental break on a stream after a rough day at work and I felt myself in a dark hole I could only do was cry out... I went back to smoking. It was the easiest thing to do especially if your co workers are smoking in the car. I'm out of weed and I smoke nicotine as it keeps me stable enough to work. But watching this makes me reflect on how I would smoke weed to get a more elevated experience out of life as I type this, life feels... Normal, like I'm doing a side quest waiting to get back on the main quest... I'm going back to therapy, and Im going to talk to my therapist to help me slowly get of cannabis. Maybe one day, I can hang with Mary Jane and we can be best friends again
I fell into drinking pretty early. I was always the primary coping mechanism (aside from drugs) my family and friend’s families used. I started out drinking with friends for fun, as most do, but is slowly became me drinking alone every day just to do it. It took a couple years and therapy for me to realize it was stemming from my depression, but mostly my general boredom with life. I’m over it now, I drink every now and again still, but it’s usually with friends again, hardly ever solo, and if it is, it’s not nearly as much and is pretty rare
I got clean after a while in rehab, then right after I got back my dad died and my mom kicked me out, and then I relapsed. It felt so good being sober, I've actually never felt better, but it's like I'm afraid of being in that better state again.
I hear you. When I was sober it was the sharpest and best I had felt in a long time. I started again around the breakdown of my relationship and afterwards I got deep again. The fear of doing better is real. The fear of doing the work and abstaining only for life to happen and things to turn sour is hard to overcome. Some might think it’s ridiculous to be afraid of having that stability and self-control, but for those of us who feel we can see the bad two steps ahead of the good at all times it’s just not so. Keep on pushing, man, because with all this being said, you have the power to remain and to find peace again. We can’t control what happens to us but we can control where we go from there, and despite what you might think about yourself through all of this, I think you deserve to go towards the path of stability and love for yourself. This might have sounded stupid, but I feel like I just know that feeling too. All the best to you
For the first time in my life I was jogging when sober. It felt good I felt good but went back. I dont know why we do it last night I drank 10 hard ciders and spent today vomiting. I wish I could capture that feeling of sobriety and want it instead of the brief buzz of alcohol.
I often think for long periods of time about my own addictions, especially to weed and alcohol. Alcohol and drugs are a way to escape myself. Its also an excuse to do thing one normally wouldnt. Addiction and drug abuse is a scary thing. Great video man. Really appreciate it. I love Hemingway. He is by far my favorite author. What is your favorite book? Mine changes a lot depending on my mood. Top 3 for me are: The Sun Also Rises, A Moveable Feast, and For Whom The Bell Tolls.
Bipolar Disorder and BPD are actually sometimes misdiagnosed for each other which is a HELLISH meme tbh, bc bipolar needs meds by default and BPD needs VERY different therapy LUL but it deffo makes sense bc of the similarity in plenty of symptoms.
@@nicoles3166 its hilarious, after i commented i was thinking the exact same thing, but i didnt feel like editing my comment bc sometimes it feels extra yanno XD he had a lot of trauma, and with a genetic disposition for Bipolar, a neurological condition, combined with trauma enough to wiggle his way into a BPD diagnosis which is The Suck, is just. wow. i kinda respect him for living so long with such suffering internally. same with the book, it sounds like a good read.
At 51, I can finally see the greatness in Hemingway's work, especially the short stories. Amazing! Fitzgerald might have been an even heavier drinker. There's a fine book titled "Alcohol and the Writer."
Right now I am reading "For whom the bell tolls" and in it, there is a constant underlying motif about how alcohol is objectively bad and is the reason for many deeds of evil in the world, and in many cases, it is what defines a person as bad, even though they are good apart from it. Yet the main character, who is on a secret mission arguably (or maybe even obviously) is a borderline alcoholic. I just think it is interesting how he embraces the fact that he is an alcoholic, yet he is still "good" or at least trying to be. I don't know if it will play some major parts in the rest of the book as I am only about halfway through, but nevertheless, there's that.
Perfect timing. During the lockdown of 2020 through early 2021 a phenomenal amount of people whom on returning after long hiatus to their jobs in the workforce had come back with an Alcohol or\& Drug addiction. Ironically a vast majority of these people before Lockdown had no history of substance abuse. Love your channel Sisyphus !
It makes me doubt sometimes, is it essential for an adult to drink alcohol in order to live a non-depressed life? Not addiction obviously, but is it impossible for a person to live an adult life without having alcohol at all? I am not an adult yet and am currently at least slightly depressed and was confused about it, I know it only hides the pain and doesn't make it actually go away but from the way it's represented in media and from how almost everybody around me drinks, it makes me think that I would HAVE to drink by the time I leave college in order to be a functional member of society
@@kuroki2986 No, you don't have to drink. Shoot for happiness without the crutch that is alcohol. Any fool can turn to the bottle for temporary relief and then wind up dependent on it. It takes a real man to learn how to weather the ups and downs of life without alcohol. That said, don't be afraid to have a couple occasionally, in social settings. There were a couple alcoholics in my family, but fortunately for me, the stuff just tastes terrible, even lower % alcohol stuff like beer and wine, and I find the couple hours of mild euphoria to be totally not worth it. After that effect wears off, you'll be lower than you've ever been. That's the nature of any drug that boosts the feel-good neurotransmitters. And alcohol is toxic so physically you won't feel quite right even if you only had one drink. Drink a significant amount and you're gonna be pretty much useless for the next few hours. Anyway, I'm sure there are plenty of successful people who never touch the stuff. Seems logical to me as successful people have less reason to use it.
I definitely understand the destructive nature of alcoholism and the importance of either responsibly regulating your habit or being completely sober, but I must say I do find it frustrating just how hard it is to find a proper substitute for the looseness and freedom of thought and action that comes with being drunk in a positive mindset. I just can’t get that way properly within a sober mindset no matter how much I try.
Hope that you have found Alcoholics Anonymous or another support group so that you can walk away from your drinking problem and towards a healthier life.
My grandfather was a functional alcoholic for most of his life and my family has always taked it quite humourosly, so I was never very empathetic towards alcoholics, and I personally always preferred weed and LSD but damn alcohol has a way of getting to you. I'm about to turn 28 and I never had the habit of drinking, I only did it every once in a while because I've never been a party person neither, but after the pandemic I'm in dire straits and going through a heartbreak and alcohol does have a way to numb the pain, it has a way to soothe you and confort you and make you feel energized and good and confident, specially when you're as alone as I am, with no emotional support from nobody alcohol can make it easier to go through all that stuff. I'm nohwere near Hemingway's alcoholism but I do see now that the drink has a sneaky way to make you feel that you need it, it's definitely some dangerous stuff.
I read a book of short stories by Hemingway a few years ago and wow does his writing create imagery in your mind! Great writer and great drinker. When you're a creative person, the world is very different from others and usually more dark than most people can see. I can attest to that statement being a life long and career musician. Sometimes us creatives need a bigger bandage than most to cover our wounds.
We are so traumatized, so wounded...no one can judge how someone else chooses to medicate themselves. I see people who are morbidly obese, pointing a finger at an alcoholic, weed smoker, or junkie, while turning a blind eye to their own addiction. We need to be compassionate. We're all hurt. If you're not wounded, consider yourself blessed. Incredibly blessed.
I didn't knew a lot about Hemingway's life, but the way you showed his story with a background focused on mental health, addiction and how art portrays the artist's struggle but also their hope reminded me of Mac Miller
@@NirtieDigger i think it’s really important for younger generations to make connections between classics and the artists of their generation. it helps them a) understand the connection between life and art and b) explore meaning deeper than plot points. there’s no need to be hateful, and i’m glad this guys taking the time to learn and make connections.
@@toadsmoss I think it's offensive to Hemingway to compare him to mac miller, it's like comparing a Ferrari to a kids tricycle. And secondly literally none of macs songs are about struggling with alcohol or addiction. Yeah he had addictions but NONE of his songs portray that, not to mention hes one of the worst rappers of our generation.
@@NirtieDigger i’m not a mac fan, so no input on his music but i am a lit teacher ! the best way to get kids interested is by letting them make connections to what they know, like artists they like, even if that connection isn’t something we see. the great thing about mental connections is that they’re based on experience and experience is something that’s unique to one person and one person alone. this goes for literature and music. it’s interpreted differently by everyone. so while you can think his connection is out of place, i don’t think it constitutes being rude. i hope you have a great day and learn something new ❤️
@@NirtieDigger You should hear Self Care. One of the saddest songs in recent history I think. He's completely aware he's dying but is powerless to stop it.
Just as a note, I decided to quit smoking a while back by finishing a session, realizing I really wanted to quit, threw away any nicotine items I owned and have been nicotine free since. Everytime I've wanted to smoke or had the opportunity, given a few minutes to think about it, I told myself "Quit, quit, quit, quit, etc." And was able to remember that I wanted to quit before I was hopelessly pulled into purchasing more. It sounds dumb, but it worked for me. For quite a while, I was also an alcoholic (about 5 years, drinking several times a day) and massively cut back almost accidentally. Accepting that I had a problem years ago, but finally cut back by... just not buying and drinking it... Maybe I just don't have a very addictive personality, but I find the description to be lacking. I am still depressed, and life is hard, but it is better without the constant inebriation .
If you quit and your life improves, you're not an addict. If you quit and your life gets worse, you're an addict. Worse of course is a subjective term, but addiction is a coping mechanism. Kind of like whether or not a person can walk if you take away their crutches. I can't speak to your personal experience except to say I'm really happy you were able to quit the way you described.
@@scottyc5116 first off, thanks a ton, I appreciate it, it wasn't the first time I tried and perhaps not the last, but it feels good to be sober. And also, I think your quality of life definitely plays into the addiction, but I do think that addicts can see the objective effects of their addiction on their life and choose to find other coping mechanisms over their addiction. Speaking for myself alone, singing and trivia nights have been great help with coping.
Everyone talking about their experiences with alcohol and here I am addicted to coffee. I have taken alcohol but I can wait for months for my next alcoholic drink. But If I miss one day of coffee the anxiety and headache is horrible. I want out of this.
I find Zizek's analysis interesting. After I became an atheist, I withdrew from almost all my family and friends, and drinking was one of the few things left in my life that I enjoyed, and I seriously wondered if I was an alcoholic. The more I thought about it, the more I realized the main reason I drank was because drinking and partying were the first things I fell in love with doing after loosing my religion. Even worse, it's one of the few things I genuinely enjoy that I could at least occasionally do with other people (99.99% of the people I know are religious) without them looking at me funny. Then it it hit me; the real reason I drink is because it's safer if everyone around me thinks I am the way I am because of drink. If they knew it was really a religious issue, I could be dead right now.
Its strange when you think about the core reason for one’s drinking. To me its an ego boost. I feel sexy and masculine. So its my lack of self confidence that often pushes me to drink. Also I really enjoy the taste of most beer, wine, and cocktails. I wish I didnt have a taste for such things. Good luck with you. Thanks for sharing
Sucks that you have to mask it like that and feel like the people around you aren't capable of rational conversation, what country are you in may I ask?
Move. It will change your life to be around people who are more like you. Just stay away from cunty people. Atheists who only care about atheism suck. Find some people who like things you do, philosophy, video games, biking, whatever it is, find cool people. I don't get why ppl just dont move if u feel alone, what do you got to lose man! Much love, and I hope you find what you are looking for!!! Stay beautiful my friend!
this is also a pretty good break down of how bipolar disorder might have been perceived before we had a proper way to process how we function. its very sad, but like. Damn. what a relatable story. i never knew this stuff about him and im just sitting here nodding along like "oh my god he went through the same emotional stuff i do but had NO support" among many other tragic things. like wow. wow. this is amazing.
"An addict is like a successful person in reverse." I can't for the life of me remember where this was from , I seem to recall it was from a TED talk but not sure at all, but I think about it any time I think about addictions
The old school mindset of what a man was kept US from ever rising to the level we aspired to. The simple act of NOT PICKING UP THE BOTTLE lifts me BEYOND that level every day....to the level of a HUMAN, just BEING.
Ernest Hemingway didn't fight in the Spanish Civil War. He was an ambulance driver in WWI, which inspired him to write A Farewell to Arms. He was a war correspondent in the Spanish Civil War. It was his inspiration for For Whom the Bell Tolls.
A true alcoholic can never moderate successfully for long only complete abstinence will work to stay stopped it is easier to stay sober than it is to get sober I feel for this man thank you for the video it was good 👍🏻
Even before I knew anything about Hemingway's drinking, he always sounded like a barfly to me. A 'barfly' spends many hours every day hanging around bars, they tell stories to other barflies and the other barflies reply with their own stories, the barfly goes to another bar and repeats the stories he heard from other barflies as though they are his own stories. Over the years a barfly develops a rich repertoire of stories to make himself sound like a man with wide experience of life when all he has actually done is hang around bars. To me, Hemingway's writing sounds like the musings of a barfly.
So before you even knew he drank a lot his musing sounded like those of a barfly. How is this possible? Are you saying that you can tell, from the stories he relates to you, whether or not a man is a barfly? What type of stories then, are required to raise your suspicions concerning his honesty and integrity, giving you the impression that you're in the presence of a barfly, and you're just hearing the stories he heard in a bar? Time isn't something I like to waste, so if I'm hearing a story about alligator hunting in the Louisiana bayou from a man I know nothing about, I don't want to come off as a pretentious and pompous asshole, instantly dismissing his claims with some "insight" I pulled out of my ass, I want to know for sure, like you, that he's just a barfly, saving me a lot of time, so any information on how to judge people in this manner would be greatly appreciated.
@@SwagMuffin567 --- SURE . . . SURE . . . TOURISTS FIGHT IN WARS. SURE. . . .| but Hemingway did not do those things, he created his own legend, by loitering about THE REAL THING, real fishermen, real bullfighters, real soldiers, like a tourist; he drove an ambulance in a war zone, he DID NOT FIGHT in a war, because he was not a soldier in an army. Hemingway was a guy of many costumes, sorta kinda like the Murican militiamen. If you want the real thing, read T.E. Lawrence who QUIETLY walked the walk.
His granddaughter or great grand daughter wrote a good book called Out Came The Sun. It gives a lot of insight into how their family is still being affected.
He was sensitive enough to notice a lot. It's in his writing. And I guess a lot of what he noticed he didn't like, couldn't change, and was inside himself, and, well, nothing like a manly, fairly socially acceptable, readily available, antianxiety medicine'. It does change things temporarily. A little vacation. Something for the end of the day, or earlier. He and his books' characters were my heroes growing up. Thanks, Earnest.
For anyone trying to quit, here are the three steps that have allowed me to kick any addictions I've had. 1. Know why you are quitting. For me, it was because I wanted to be proud of myself. 2. Understand that when you relapse, you are not relieving yourself from stress in life but increasing it. 3. Withraval pains may last couple days, but then you are free.
I have all the signs and am aware that it is the single biggest problem in my life. If I try, I stay sober a couple days, then think basically "whatever, who cares, I can do what I want", and then drink for several days. Slowly starting to accept that it´s going to kill me.
I’ve always thought addiction was such a strange thing, and when you quite it’s even worse. It feels like you’re running in a way that you almost trip and fall but you have to keep catching yourself, you’re stuck balancing while sprinting full pace ahead. Art is like the inverse personally, once you start you have to keep going or else it might disappear, that cool idea you had might not be done. It’s hard to do though when you can’t find the motivation to start.
Outstanding work by Sisyphus 55 here like always 🔥✊✨ BTW, take it from a person who has seen first hand substance abuse problems and the downfalls. You must fight your bad addictions sooner than later, because your life may very actually depend on it no matter how small or big the addiction. Don't give up that fight, you can halt these bad habits. ❤️
I smoke weed on and of since I was 15 (10years now) through all up's and down's in my life this habbit never left me..I had times where I smoked once a week and other times I smoked every evening a few joints. I think this video helped me to understand addiction better since I'm struggling lately to keep my fingers of
Just my 2 cents. I’m not a psychologist, I’m not a research scientist either. But I have close family members, my cousin who struggles with alcoholism and smoking, my brother who struggles from even stronger alcoholism, my childhood life growing up around drug addicts, and now in my college life where during pandemic one of my room mates became addicted to meth. So, I have a lot of experience around addiction and in that way I live through them. I myself never struggled with addiction. But I have goals, motivation. I used to smoke, but I got into the hobby of weight lifting. Excessive drinking and smoking got in the way of that. So I stopped and it was easy. What I wanted was stronger than my need to smoke. My cousin and brother including my room mate had no hobbies. They worked dead end jobs with no goal or attempts to better their lives. I think this somehow plays into addiction. I have no credibility but I don’t think I’m wrong.
Brother, you are onto something. Having a "thing" that is. That you can see the predisposition is gold. Knowing you grew up with inconsistency in emotion, hots and colds I'm guessing. Just look at Trump as a teetotaller and his brother dying from alcoholism. Growing up with addiction is a real test on one's resilience. Good luck staying on the right path. All strength to you.
@@Daveyboy10053 Then they may still be motivated and positive. Instead of depressed and filled with despair. Punishing yourself, however, with alcohol, is not a good sign. Socialising with alcohol, can be uplifting, but drowning sorrows alone is another kettle of fish.
I swear the algorithm knows me. Yesterday I said I would stop drinking and then this video show up in my feed. It always does this, the algorithm is reinforcing my efforts with knowledge that will eventually be created. 🤣
Where you pointed out his poor interpersonal relationships were a potential catalyst for his drinking, I agree, however, I think it may be slightly different in nature than one would assume. It is not the lack of interpersonal relationships alone that cause one to fall into despair and turn to the bottle, it's not having them for long enough to look upon them externally with a critical eye, and see just how shallow and meaningless relationships really are. You reach a point where you realise that even if you found a lover/companion, it really amounts to nothing more than wasted time and potentially creating a new human with all the same shit to deal with that you had in your life. If you are too much of a coward to end your life, or perhaps you can't because there are still those in the world who love you, and you don't want to hurt them. What else can you do, but drink? Drinking is a great way to speed up time while also numbing the effects of existing.
Ive been a daily to semi drinker since about 19 and never really took it out of hand , Since covid and going back to school at 25 hit me at the same time I have noticed because of the stress of school ive been more attached to drinking than normal .
Hola Sisyphus, espero que hayas tenido un hermoso fin de semana. Me encantan tus videos!! Me han ayudado tanto durante esta pandemia de mierda, muchas gracias por lo que haces!
Watching this while tipsy. Tried being sober but failed after the long boredom eight months in. I'm an addict plan and simplem. I can't wait to stop and I am always postpoinng when that will be. I don't drink as much as some other people who manage better but I know that doesn't actually make it okay deep down indside. Cheers!
Alcoholism is weird I joined a fraternity and would drink every day then after a few weeks I noticed I was drinking to drink not for fun so that made me stop after a few weeks and that was the worst week ever
I feel I need to watch this through again several times, I've never been drawn to alcohol or drugs as a substance to lean on, but I have other addictive non healthy behaviours, and that bit about hope keeping us in the addiction really rang true with me, as I often think to myself at some point in the future I will get healthy and refrain from these distructive coping mechanisms, but then decades so by...no change, but the intention to change ever present. I'd like to know; how do people cope with difficult feelings once their crutch of choice is removed? If knew that then giving up wouldn't be so difficult! I keep meaning to read Gabour Maté's book on addiction as I've seen interesting videos of him talking about how all addictions are harmful eg. workaholism and things like shopping addiction, gambling, body picking/ plucking, self harm, food addiction etc. All the things people do to numb out from their/our pain. I just thought I'd mention it in case it helps anyone. I also think Johann Hari has done a good book on addiction too, as well as his bk on depression. All the best everyone battling on in the daily struggle.
I got to addicted status cuz of the toxic "worry" my family had. Bunch of hypocrites. I wanted to prove they didn't actually care but were projecting their anger about our alcoholic father onto me. I kept drinking which in a way proved both of us right in hindsight, but I'll leave with this... They would ask me almost daily if I had a drink or would treat as if I had regardless. Been sober over two months now and they never ask or talk about it anymore and sometimes I struggle to keep the train going. Just funny how they were more involved before and not after when that's when involvement should really be focused on
So glad to think that you have walked away from stupid alcohol. What a waste of time and money it is! It's a shame that you feel your family care for you less now. You may find that it helps to ask them questions about their lives and how they are going. Also I hope that you can find other ways to connect with other people e.g. by going bushwalking or playing table tennis or joining a book club.
Thanks to post this and atrract attention into addiction and mental health overall. In order to be an alcoholic or addicted to anything else (be it work, a person, drugs, etc) one need to be first a neurotic (in the wide, often disused term) which comprises many neuroses or disorders like narcissism, etc. It's basically a sick ego. The AA self help program works by reducing the ego of the sick person after he has accepted that he's sick and needs treatment. I am almost 5 years sober thank God. Cheers y'all.
I used to care about self improvement in my 20's. Now I am 30 and feel totally content with my mundane existence. Someone turns a light out in us after the 20's end. Edit: I am two weeks sober and wow this comment of mine from only 9 months ago is depressing.
My brother idolised Hemingway etc and became a heavy drinker due to their romantic view of boozing (Orwell's "Down and Out in Paris and London was a favourite of his) whilst also trying to cope with early life trauma (we didn't have the best childhood).. He's currently in his 6th week in intensive care (one week in an induced coma) and had two life saving operations. He's 36. There's no glamour in alcoholism. It's only a downward spiral.
*Edit. He died in the small hours of this morning (2 days before my birthday) by being administered with morpheme as his liver couldn't be stabilised. Such a waste of potential. It's been devastating for my Mum - there's just me and her left of our family in the UK, and only a few left in Sweden/her country of birth.
I also lost my Aunt 4 days after my brother followed by my other aunt and a cousin a few weeks later. My father died 99 days after my brother, the day after Burns Night (he was Scottish).
:( rest in peace
May his memory be a blessing.
I know how empty the words are, but my sincerest sympathies and condolences to you and your family. For me, quitting cocaine was easy by comparison (not to say it was "easy") drinking has a grip that is incredibly hard to get free of. May he find peace
Fuck, man. I'm so sorry.
Thanks for the condolences. Not what I wished to happen, but let it serve as a lesson and I hope it helps you or others you know and love that there is an alternative to drinking. It just needs to be found.
I never realized why people drink until the mess that was 2020. I only drank for entertainment before but recently I see the massive reduction in stress it temporarily brings. From paralyzed with anxiety to "functioning". I'm laying off the bottle but I have more sympathy for alcoholics now
It's a crutch. It can help you get there, but doesn't mean anything is healthy or fine. ( I had to give it up too, but yeah. It definitely gave me a different perspective about addiction)
I'm struggling alot with drinking at the moment....and I really gotta freaking stop..ugh
I did the Meetings and all, but they were face to face for me years ago and a lot of it now is, ugh, Zoom. Still gave me such a foundation in 06 that march 2020-present didn't make me do opioids or drink. Its prob cause I know Im certainly a dead man if I do, I wont stop, I cant, and I really like my life now. Back in 05 death didn't scare me. Waking up did.
I guess I learned that thru 2003-05 with all the relapsing and shit. "One more night get it out of my system" becomes a year unable to stop at ALL. Lather, rinse, repeat. AS many times as it took to be in a place worse then death. THEN wisdom and doing whatever the meeting people said to do.
i play splat2 and do drugs and drink too
It makes me happy seeing more and more people bring addiction a little more I to the light. Right on man, right on.
You sound like Jesse pinkman
@@VeganSemihCyprus33 addiction is caused by the intake of a substance repeatedly, and then the brain getting used to the drug and starting to expect it to maintain homeostasis
@@jaydeep-p hahahah
@@liminality8791 that's dependence which is separate from addiction.
Yeah so dumb how it's sweept under the rug. Plus mental health.
I couldn’t even begin to tell you how well-timed this video was for me. Thank you, sincerely.
Well, just by saying that then you Did begin to tell. So, yes, what timing it was.
Yeah same here. Just went out rather heavily drinking last night due to being frustrated by life in general, but also for admittedly masochistic reasons. I think after how dumb I feel today and this video I’m definitely going to at the very least heavily regulate my drinking from now on.
I feel like a lot of the perception of Hemmingway doesn't come from his books because in at least the ones I've read the main character always has a deep sadness that is constantly hovering over their shoulder. I was attracted to Hemmingway because of how I could relate to the characters that were suffering through things and would only allow their feelings to escape in short bursts where they might go crazy until they could once again control it. It's hard to say that those characters have any hope for the future they just continue on because they don't really have much else to do. I kinda thought that Hemmingway was just like those characters, hopeless and suppressing his real emotions. I also can't recall any of his books that I've read having a happy ending. Either most haven't read his books or my interpretation was just different than most.
It always amazed me how all his characters felt like real people. They all felt like people I know / knew. The problems they faced always seems to relatable.
I get tough bouts of depression that can be maddening. It was relatable and enjoyable to read his work as I think he poured his soul into it. And I really appreciate that. I think thats what makes me enjoy his writing so much. Thanks for sharing. Great comment
Most if not all of his stories are based on real adventures he went on, and it shows. The thing I love about his books are the realistic human elements that come with real life grand adventures; the dramatic messiness that arises in an attempt to live out a romantic vision. It keeps the story simultaneously relatable and unpredictable. Definitely one of my favorite authors.
I really want to read those books now, since this is one of the first times I've seen someone describe a piece of media that I legitimately relate to
Hemingway is a rare ISTP author the type is known for problems with melancholy and addiction there are many examples in movies generally playing the anti hero role 50 or so examples are contained within 👉ua-cam.com/video/gOHuk_MKluA/v-deo.html👈
Well said brother
83 days sober today 💪 thanks for sharing man
How many days now?
Fantastic! Hope you keep going and if you fall down, just get right back up again and reclaim that good health and happiness that is rightfully yours.
I just hit two years. It gets easier. Keep it up
@@jonathanennis111 Awesome man congrats! I have 1 year 2 months and my life has never been better
@@leticiacardenas745 423
I’m a combat veteran. Specifically, a former Infantryman.
Soldier’s Home had a profound impact upon me when I read it.
You live life afterwards numb. If something, anything, makes you feel something, you keep doing it.
I don’t know what he was carrying around, maybe it was his WWI experience.
Hemmingway didn’t care about anyone. Just like Krebs didn’t care about his mother.
But you can only stay ahead of that for so long. Either you deal with it, or it ends you.
I think that played a large part in what ended him.
Well said, at some point you have to deal with it. Either beat it or let it beat you.
Well that, and the shotgun.
Finally an explanation as to why I was an alcoholic
My brother drank himself to death. He was only 56. He had alcohol problems from a young age. He was never at peace. His last days where lonely and sad. It was 5 months ago now. I cry as i write this. I am sorry Phil. I hope you are at peace.
sorry chris, watching someone you love self destruct is just awful.
What a sad memory for you, Chris! Sending you love and courage!
@@tracesprite6078 Thank you. sad around xmass
@@chriscoralAloha Yes, Christmas is an especially sad time for those who have lost a family member, especially as this is your first Christmas without your brother. I would love to think that Phil is, indeed, at peace. You may like to call Friendline 1800 4 CHATS. I hope that you can find some calmness over Christmas and that the New Year goes well for you.
@@tracesprite6078 Thank you for your kindness and understanding. Wishing you a happy new year.
as somebody with an addiction, this really helps a lot.
thanks Sisyphus!
This video really helped me better understand how I view the relationship that people around me (and myself) have with mental well-being and substance abuse. It has this strange mixture of emotional response and better understanding that I can't say I usually get watching youtube videos. there are so many great points to take away from this, even re-watching it a few times really reinforced ideas I had missed watching it the first time.
I really love the direction you are taking with this channel and I really excited for more of it.
Like a lot of entertainment it’s an escape from worry.
As one who has quit and relapsed countless times - before getting sober nine years ago - I can say that quitting drink invariably involves a prolonged period of pretty severe depression at the outset. It is this depression which drives many to relapse, thinking: "If this is sobriety, it's not worth trouble; I'd rather keep dealing with jails, institutions, and likely death." Getting through this initial depressed phase (from 6 months to several years) is a major key to reaching long-term sobriety. Twelve-step programs helped me, and ultimately, it was reaching a point where the alcohol had physiologically stopped working (couldn't get any euphoria from it; only stupefaction and havoc upon the innards) which prompted the final renunciation. Hemingway couldn't stick it out through this period, which makes sense given his diminished powers of mentation - which killed his ability to write. Having goals helps immeasurably in early sobriety; he knew he'd lost all power to reach his goals.
This hits home for me man. Living with depression, it feels like you have a hangover whether you drink or not, so why not drink? You're the same mess of a human each morning after 0 drinks or 10. It takes a while to realize that it's worth it to quit, it feels too good forgetting about everything all day. But it does come crashing down eventually. I had acute pancreatitis finally stop my drinking thankfully, without much permanent damage to my body, but if I could've drank myself to death painlessly I might have. Still in the darkness, but I know it's a lot darker at the bottom of the bottle.
This hits terrifyingly deep to me. I've been a self destructive alcoholic since I was 15, struggling with severe mental illness for years, BPD, Bipolar, etc. Mood swings, feelings of inadequacy, unstable relationships, feeling like your living a nightmare. (I also occasionally write, though not even slightly as well as Hemingway.) Every day is a struggle, and I drowned myself in alcohol to cope. I would be so desperate as to make my own in my closet wine I was younger. Alcohol does nothing but amplifies the misery, but you feel so numb as to no longer care if you live or die. It takes away the filter, the restraint, and you unleash all your pain and frustration. This makes it so alluring, and yet so dangerous. Only this year have I attempted to get sober, in August I was in serious danger of dying from combined drinking and self harm. I've failed 3 times now, but I'm still trying. It's so tempting, but will only seal my fate.
"You're not alone and if you don't quit it will kill you."
This is what was said to me recently.
I heard it.
So can you.
What you need to do is stop the drinking and spend your time doing other shit, and build routines around doing those things sort of like you do with drinking. I started at 14 and stopped at 27 (I will drink a now barely enjoyable beer with a meal maybe once a month). Make sure you have multiple new hobbies to be doing so you don’t become unhealthily obsessed with one (I was becoming too obsessed with the gym). Plenty of things to get into, even technical stuff lol .. buy an old computer online for $50 and look up videos on how to tinker around .. stuff like that. Just started making these changes around the new year and I feel like a new person entirely, not even in a manic way. My overall happier energy and diminishing beer gut/puffy beer face is also getting me more attention from women.
It’s very tough in the beginning, and a lot of realizations to your numbness will arise, but you take it in stride and soon enough each day starts to feel better, falling together like dominos. Good luck to you
The hardest part for me is I have nothing to look forward to anymore, life seems dull and empty without my poisons
It gets better!!
I feel the same my answers for now are : Work out, take boxing classes or some other intense sport , travel, go hiking, fuck more, ride your car.. Bascis activities that we all forget about but are kinda quintessential to feeling alive. If this stuff doesn't work man you gotta try harder in finding enjoyable stuff..
Try sky-diving. You can always change your mind.
Most addicts are also in a depression. The depression is caused often by unressolved trauma. The addiction creates a short term illusjon that it « helps» against anxiety/depression/pain, but reality is that it makes them grow and also creates it.
See a therapist asap, and focus on having regular sleep, eat healthy, exercise, and DON’T isolate your self!. You are gonna be ok!
it takes practice. you'll get there, keep goin. they say look at the positives. what they dont say is you gotta look at the positives every day on purpose for like a year or two before your brain is trained to do it naturally, or before it really even helps much. but once you get there, it's a lot easier. we're normally sensitive to the negatives, we have to force ourselves to see the good stuff, and practice it.
Wow, great video. I’m only 37 but have been drinking daily for at least the last 7 years. Never had anything life altering in a negative way happen due to alcohol and as far as I know I’m still in good health, but I feel like it’s time to stop or at least significantly cut back. Just becoming more & more dependent and my tolerance is thru the roof. Supposed to see a psych next week, optimistic for what the future may hold.
Hope that you are going from strength to strength, Mike.
You'll be better without it, trust your gut. Liver cirrhosis is an issue you don't want to deal with also. Best of luck
alcohol just can’t be your and my best friend… really. Coming from my own experience. Best of luck
@@g.l.4707 It sounds like a bitter experience but at least you know what you know now. Good luck and good management for the future.
As a major Hemingway and Sysiphus fan for years, well done. There is much contained in Ernest's writing and protagonists that exude precisely your thoughts; the core revolving around responsibility being the counterpoint to a daily escape from it. Keep up the absolutely excellent work.
I would absolutely love to see a similar jaunt into Kurt Vonnegut's life, writing, and philosophy from you.
Jesus, nobody gets how important it was for the work. Funny how everyone compared their drinking to the drinking of a genius and the part it plays in the process…
Yeah Gg y🦾
T
I'm not addicted to alcohol, but after watching this video I've made the decision to pour out the rest of what I have in the house. It's horrifying the power alcohol could have over me, and I'm watching this after a night of binge drinking. My grocery list of mental health issues aside, I don't want to put my parents or any of my loved ones through having to deal with my addiction. Hell, I'd be disappointed in myself if I went down that road.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for making this video.
If you have additive personality you probably not gonna avoid a drink problem
MUCH RESPECT, sir... from someone whose father did just what you are doing and became the greatest family man ever after his recovery. Stay the course... you cannot imagine yet how difference and good life can be on the other side, in the light...
bingo
I hope that you have been able to keep that resolution over the past year. Sending you good wishes and hope for good health and happiness.
If you're thinking about alcohol and pouring it out. You're probably an Alcoholic. Just my opinion, with years of addiction/recovery, under my belt. Good luck, hope you choose a good path.
I recently quit drinking. I come from a culture of alcoholics and a family of particularly serious alcoholics. the absolute ruthlessness of my anxieties and depression and trauma are literally crashing down on me at all times. I want nothing more than to have a drink and crawl back into platos cave. thanks for making this video and getting me through one more day.
Hey. Did it get better?
I have sat for hours trying to figure out how to answer this. Better isn't an accurate word.
So let's go back to the cave analogy. Lets imagine the entrance to the cave is behind a huge crashing waterfall of depression and trauma and all that shit. Every day when you have to leave the cave the waterfall beats you the fuck down and you barely make it out. But you have to leave. Can't just starve in the cave. And so you get beat the fuck up day after day and barely make it out. Then one day you bend your knees a certain way and time it out just right and you pop out the other side and only take half the beating.
I haven't bent my knee right yet, but I think it's possible. So better? No. The waterfall doesn't change. It doesn't get better. But after all the beatings I think i can figure it out.
I hope some of that makes sense lol
For the longest time I was a genuine substance abuser. My drug of choice is marijuana, for so long I told myself I would quit and never did it. Now I’m fully sober even quitting nicotine. It’s still incredibly hard tho, so many people around me still use it. And so many relationships were built upon it. I love the metaphor of the people in the cave, it fully encapsulates the feelings I have. It’s hard tho because I want the people around me to quit as well, but it’s impossible to show them the truth so I no longer try. Some people may say that marijuana is not a drug, and if that’s what you think then you obviously don’t understand it’s implications. Just like anything else it allows you to avoid your problems, it allows you to hide them behind a wall of smoke. It draws you in with its intense feelings of euphoria and keeps you there with the social anxiety it brings you. In my case it made me isolate, for the longest time I searched for why my personality had seemingly changed. I was in denial of the truth, I still don’t feel “normal” yet. But it takes time. Thank you for this wonderful video
Hello my friend. I quit 20 years of tobacco in 2008 and weed and alcohol on July 9, 2013. I am 56 years old now and clean abd sober 9 years. I am in great shape and a better person. I recently started a new relationship with a beautiful woman my age who is also clean and sober (25 yeara) and very fit.
I am now living in the moment and grateful for all of the gifts given to me.
Peace, my friend.
@@alaskahudson good for you, friend, good for you 👍
Cannabis can be an awful thing if it becomes your life, but you must count yourself lucky to have a choice of drug so relatively easy to get off of. I had a period of doing too much THC, and the problem with it is demotivation and simply, it stops working.
What if you were using something that actually did deeply change your feelings, that really could have the power to make everything feel perfect and lovely, in a way that weed could never do, chemically? You may say "Oh, weed did that for me!" but no, I'm talking about units of dopamine. I think cannabis can increase dopamine units to about "50" (unsure of their measurements, but getting this from scientific papers) whereas heroin was "600" and meth was "1100". Now, personal preference still shows here, as lots of people have preference to, say, opioids over meth, due to the nature of the high, even though meth is supposedly giving you a higher level of dopamine. So, to a small extent, if you are the perfect person to become addicted to cannabis, you could bump that number up to "100". Still, count yourself lucky.
Weed throws my life off the rails about 10x quicker than alcohol.
Not into weed. When I was a kid my dad said quitting THC wasn't easy, because of the emotional dependence. He also said that it took about 12 months, then his brain somehow changed, changed back to normal healthy thinking. I heard this experience and knew I didn't need it in my life, powerful stuff to tell a kid, and damn it was effective.
I had a similar rekindling of my appreciation for Hemingway. When I first had to read "Old Man and the Sea" in high school, I didn't enjoy it and thought it was boring. I picked up "Farewell to Arms" later on and loved the tragedy of it. My ideas around masculinity changed and I saw a lot of the ideals shown in that book as counterproductive because, really, they are. Hemingway changed for me again when I read his biography and other works on his life. His books changed again for me too and he became this deeply tragic figure, obviously trying to create a hyperbolized version of himself in his books where he always comes away emotionally unscathed and resilient, because in real life, he couldn't do that. It makes all of his works better not because of the ideas they espouse but because of the truth and the fear that is behind them. His books still find a new way to break my heart after all this time.
Edit: I know it's unlikely people will read this full comment, but I feel like I'm on a roll, so this is really just for me to get my thoughts out.
As brilliant as I think Hemingway is, I can't help but imagine what his works could've been if he was able to be honest with himself and with his readership. To put those fears of rejection, inadequacy, and annihilation into words could've helped so many people suffering in the same silent way. Makes it all the more tragic, in my opinion.
I really enjoy the overall tragedy of most of his work. The bittersweet nature of it all. Bittersweet is a word used over and over to describe his work but it really hits home. In many ways he was deeply in tune with the tragedies of life, including his own. Thank you for the thought provoking comment.
He used alcohol to drown his sorrows... no reason to display those fears if he didn't want to.
This is the whole struggle of human nature.
excellent comment, but I respectfully disagree. Hemingway's mental illness was one of the main "enablers" of his genius. Without this mental trauma, he would likely have never attained the great heights that he did. It is not a coincidence that many of the greatest writers have had serious mental issues.
Soldier"s Home!
All people hold this duality. He’s not good or bad, truth or liar, masculine or damaged, just a person. When we learn how to move beyond labels they lose there meaning, that’s a true virtue. Psychology and science are a stepping stone not the reality.
Videos such as these are greatly needed on UA-cam: those that deal with serious problems of people in a properly sensitive, practical, simple, and caring way. Keep up the good work.
Addiction is the worst and most tiresome $hit that's ever happened to me. And the crazy part is that even though I've been heavily addicted to amphetamine, opiods and benzodiazepines for about 25 years I just find something else to abuse. All the time. Now I'm 50 and don't touch anything heavy but I live in Thailand since 8-9 years and now I'm addicted to something I didn't even know existed 10 years ago. Kratom. It's not like heroin or speed in any way, but still an addiction. What baffles me the most is the fact that when I have been clean for a, relatively speaking, long time, I'm at it again. Just another substance. So tired of me, myself and my life as an idiot
Cheer up old chap you will be dead in 20 yrs
Wherever you go
There you are
You are certainly not alone - I think there are deep issues that can cause addictive behavior, and it can be all but impossible to really solve the deeper issues, but I think it's worth trying.
As a long recovering alkie I found that the addiction will always be with me. I have utilized it to find a healthy or productive addiction that replaces my destructive affliction. Helping others with their problems get me out of myself, biking, fishing, woodworking, whatever it is, if it’s positive that is the direction to pursue. I also know that change will only come from within. There is no one or event that has the power to compel an alcoholic mind to stop other than themselves. Although the compulsion for alcohol has left me I must remain mindful of where my addictive personality will lead me. Good luck to all seeking answers
@@Jaegov That resonates with me - if I get into something, I usually really get into it.
When I got into chess, I became pretty darn good at chess, because I was borderline-obsessive.
But the same character traits that can help a person excel can also help a person destroy himself.
This video was honestly just incredible and something I really needed right now. Thank you for this, and keep it up!
awesome profile pic
Clicked for the profile pic. They're opening for chili peppers in Seattle in August 🤯
Sean Brogan what is his pfp
@@olsaaan album art for one of the best garage rock albums ever Is This It by The Strokes
@@Bewmbshakalaka Thanks
Honestly you never think you’re an alcoholic or an addict until clinically deemed one. After I got sent to rehab for alcoholism I saw so many red flags and indicators. I’m glad I watched this video again. It just makes me realize I’m not alone. It crazy that not everyone goes through this as well. I’m glad this brings substance abuse to light.
Honestly? Nope. People know they want to stop but can't. People go to AA and watch vids like this without a dr prescription
Hope that you are going from strength to strength and finding good health and calm and enjoyment in a non-addicted life.
this page brings light to my darkness, with deeply thought-provoking insight, each time.
Recently watched that Ken Burns documentary on Hemingway with my dad & this video adds some really valuable colour. Alcoholism runs in my family. I also struggled with it since I moved out at 16... Hemingway makes me want to get better and live long enough to find peace.
MUCH RESPECT to you... stay the course ...
Hope that you find some peace and that you also find interest in the non-peaceful times as you try to be honest with yourself and also caring towards yourself and others.
it is a demonic spirit
Seeing someone struggling with alcoholism is extremely painful. Recently, I almost ruined myself trying to be there for someone, who I loved very much, who couldn't even be there for himself because of his drinking. To see the very essence of who someone is, slowly deteriorate before your eyes and no matter how hard you try to help them in the end, there's no way you can pull them out of that hell unless they are willing to do something to help themselves.
He was the one who broke things off with me, once he realized that it was a journey that he would have to embark on on his own. He realized how badly his drinking was hurting me before even I did. Many sleepless nights of hospital visits where the nurses would warn him that he had the possibility of dying from withdrawl. I probably would have ended up ruining my own mental health trying to stay with him and help him through his demons before I would have decided to cut things off to save myself. Ultimately, he did me a great kindness by insisting that he try to work through it on his own, so that he wouldn't end up dragging me down with him.
It just hurts so much when you know that they are an amazing person, with a cruel cruel addiction sucking the life out of them like a parasite.
Needless to say, I hate alcohol and I hate how it is capable of completely ruining the life of someone you care about so deeply. The nights are still sleepless, because I've spent the past several months since our relationship ended, praying to the universe that he doesn't end up drinking so much that he won't be able to recover. The thought haunts me, and it's even more painful still that there is just nothing that I can do for him, even as his friend. It's just not fair.
If he joins a recovery program with other alcoholics he stands a better chance of recovery than on his own. The beginning can be tough but he can get there if he wants it. Take care.
There is no reason to hate alcohol. He would have found another addiction escape with. He would have had the same problem with someone else. He probably had some form of abandonment or neglect in his life.
I have a friend who keeps failing to get their act together and I find myself getting tossed back and forth between the exhaustion of trying to carry them and the guilt of not doing enough. But we can't change the way that others act. We can only change the way we react. Strength and patience to you, friend.
My alcoholism destroyed everything I loved. I don't believe alcohol is evil it's just evil for me. I'm alcohol intolerant, like lactose intolerant, except instead of having bowel trouble , I shit on everything I care about, loose jobs and end up homeless. Needless to say after 20yrs I finally figured it out. However, I'm positive I hurt good friends that only wanted to help and genuinely cared. There is nothing you can do , the individual has to do it themselves. I'm so sorry you had to watch your friend basically dissolve in front of you. I cried out to a Jesus Christ on my last 7day liquor bender. I'm sober now. Still coming to terms with the wreckage and broken relationships I destroyed. It makes me physically sick to think of all I did.. I pray I never forget.
Strafe, there is absolutely every need to abhor, detest and hate alcohol. You do not know anything about addiction - you're either very green and young or in denial because you, yourself, like it. It is among the most harmful substances for people to imbibe. It is the greatest eraser of all time. It erases your money, your friends, your possessions, your house, your self respect and finally, your sanity. I know, I am a recovering alcoholic.
One of my shrinks told me that I was going to wind up like Hemingway. I kinda look forward to it. Your video is giving me a headache, but I'll give you a thumbs up on the way out.
I just wanna point out that while genes do have a factor in mental illness, they are not by any means the only/most important one. I just don’t want people out there to feel like their fate is already written and that they don’t have any power to manage symptoms and live with wellness
It's just living life with a higher difficulty where it matters: being content
I don't totally agree.. I do believe that genes have a strong impact on our behaviors, in fact my genes are telling me to ask for your IG, if this isn't fate I don't know what it is..
@@killexpert5095 haha I totally feel the same way. It's like those games where u can tweak the difficulty in specific ways (like enemy damage, your own HP, item drops, eg). Some got it easy, some got it tough as fudge
@@albred5051 She said mental illness, genes aren't the only factor there.
Well yeah no but still you can't say that your point is right. The brain is insanely complex and to argue that you know what exactly cause certain changes in how the brain functions is stupid. Your genes might be the reason and what of it? Why does it matter since you are not made by what you're given but what you make of it.
I would love to see a similar examination of Hunter S. Thompson. Hemingway was a symbol of true, reckless masculinity for me ever since I read The Old Man and the Sea in my tween years, but his space within my consciousness was basically entirely supplanted by Thompson once I became I teen. He seems to me in many ways the things that Hemingway purported to be: a force of nature utterly unconcerned with social convention while retaining a certain guiding self-consciousness. I’m particularly fascinated with the Thompson of Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail of ‘72, as in many ways it feels to me like his most “honest” work, as much as one can hope to glean honesty from an author whose entire career and style is built around the willful blurring of lines between reality and fantasy.
This!
There's this Hunter S. Thompson bit with a late show host, I think Conan. Hunter takes the host shooting guns. They use Hunter's picture, his books, and a full size cardboard cutout of Hunter as the targets. Hunter sawing a cardboard caricature of himself in half with an M60... I don't know why, but I always felt like that kind of summed up who Hunter was.
@@raskolnikovsghost2701 --- CORRECT. | H.S. Thomspon despised the bullshit that is the U.S.
I admire the courage of men who volunteer to help in bushfires and floods. They are wonderful. However, I also want them to look after themselves and not damage their livers with heavy drinking. We need them to be alive, not dead. Thank you, brave men.
Everything seems painfully hopeless so why go forward. That’s why God sent his son, to give life and peace.
Very well-produced video, accurate, well-researched, and the writing is straightforward, the presentation refreshingly lacking in sensationalism.
I took my first drink at 14. It felt like a miracle. A kind of temporary, subjectively perfect freedom; from pain, from the terrible weight of being oneself.
Bliss.
It was only a couple of years before I was hiding alcohol around the house and even the neighbourhood.
As an adult, I lost everything. Right down to my teeth.
Zizek is absolutely right on
Thankfully, I got so ill, so desperate and bored by drink and drugs, it became clear that I had to quit or die. Haven't taken a drink in twenty years. It's not over tho, I know I'm always a bad day away from a rapid return to self-destruction.
I think the drink and drugs quit me, not the other way around.
Let's hope they don't regain an interest in my life...
Recovery is Recovery. Like a person who may never walk agian, so is our addiction. But I draw inspiration from people in physical therapy, pushing and pulling through pain, its amazing to me, and they have people cheering them on, and its this type of love that most addicts need to get and stay clean, in our addiction somthing is crippled, like wings, but if we work our recovery we get better.
Unironically one of the best videos ive seen in a long time
Why would that be an ironic statement
@@gyromaster4174 uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, im stupid gimme a break
@@rtxon6031 it’s okay you can always learn 👍
@@rtxon6031 “No, No, he’s got a point”
@@gyromaster4174 We are under so many layers of irony in society, that it is difficult to enjoy things earnestly. I blame post modernism
I believe the emptiness and the helpless feeling this unfeeling world can often make people feel . Meditation and self awareness a great help.i wish love and strength to all🤗
Thank you for inspiring me to read Hemmingway. I've read The Old Man and the Sea, absolute beauty.
I like your channel
Try A Farewell to Arms. 😎
Great video. It actually helped me quit, ive been sober for almost 8 months now.
My father is alcoholic and also had BED, and has shown signs of possible bipolar for years. His eating disorder led to him becoming obese and then doing the by-ass surgery to lose weight, and then his smoking and drinking got worse. He kicked smoking and then primarily drank, putting everyone's lives at risk. His father was also an alcoholic.
My mother has ADHD, which I inherited along with autism. All of that plus the fact both parents were abusive to me growing up, made me develop pretty much all shapes of addiction for different reasons. Chemical given my brain does not produce enough dopamine on its own and substances pose as a low hanging fruit to satiate such absence, and because of a need to create an illusion of regulation. Restraint and abandon back and forth.
The stigma on addiction is very strong. Addicts are perceived as weak and lazy without knowing the cause of addiction or knowing about the person better. I was one of the people who thinks the same way before, but when I became an addict myself, it gave me a very different view. At first, I thought I was just enjoying it, and that I just became weak and dropped my guard. But my therapist helped me find the root cause of my addiction and we did steps to overcome it. Surprizingly, the steps we did was not directly about the substance and it's negative effects on the body. It's rarely even discussed, and when it is part of the topic, my therapist would just go through it with a rushed and nonchalant tone. What we concentrated more would be on what I feel during those moments when I was under the influence, why I hang on it too much, and what are the other activities that would give me the same feeling. This actually helped me better than what my friends would do by stating all the scary effects of the substance to my body. I was almost on the stage of self destruction, so those scary stuff won't really affect me. I'm a lot better now but still with my therapist, and when I see a fellow addict (with whatever substance or activity), I now see them as a fellow beings, who are troubled and who needs help. I don't think we have enough effort on educating people about addiction here in my country, and I believe that's one of the best step to actually overcome it.
Addicts should just identify as trans...no more stigma!
You know that real causes are fake right?
Very true, and not only are addicts perceived as weak and lazy, but they are perceived that way by other addicts.
I once saw a guy smack a glass pipe out of his nephew's mouth while the guy was drunk, because marijuana bad, m'kay? Apparently getting drunk and committing assault on one's nephew is totally OK, but smoking weed is horrible. In my opinion, the nephew had a serious alcohol problem, and the uncle was drinking with him.
Then you have the anti-depressant crowd, pretending like the drugs they take aren't addictive, when they most certainly are.
Anyway, I agree 100% that the root causes of addiction are deep, and I also believe that almost everyone in America is an addict in one way or the next, even though people love to throw stones from their glass houses.
I used the title of his unfinished trilogy, the sea book, for a group of sketchbooks I've stuffed with poetry because I felt a deep connection to the pain of his characters and his struggle with alcoholism. I'm terrified of alcohol because I'm surrounded by addicts who try to numb pain just like he did, and genetically I'm doomed if I ever start drinking. Part of the reason I stay sober is him, and that sounds kind of goofy, but it works
I admire your commitment to avoiding alcohol. It is literally a poison! I hope you keep on choosing good health, and that you keep on writing poetry and being creative and healthy.
As someone who smokes weed and is in a lull of getting therapy. I started because during that time my mom was in a toxic relationship after being in one and I did it to keep myself stable. I remember my first time trying a dab pen and being on VRChat tripping and it was awesome.
But as someone who works min wage I would have to wait until I had a good check and would get some weed.
But I remember one time I was sober and I had a mental break on a stream after a rough day at work and I felt myself in a dark hole I could only do was cry out... I went back to smoking. It was the easiest thing to do especially if your co workers are smoking in the car.
I'm out of weed and I smoke nicotine as it keeps me stable enough to work. But watching this makes me reflect on how I would smoke weed to get a more elevated experience out of life as I type this, life feels... Normal, like I'm doing a side quest waiting to get back on the main quest... I'm going back to therapy, and Im going to talk to my therapist to help me slowly get of cannabis.
Maybe one day, I can hang with Mary Jane and we can be best friends again
I have the "this is the last blunt syndrome " but I'm trying to stop completely till I'm stable.
I fell into drinking pretty early. I was always the primary coping mechanism (aside from drugs) my family and friend’s families used. I started out drinking with friends for fun, as most do, but is slowly became me drinking alone every day just to do it. It took a couple years and therapy for me to realize it was stemming from my depression, but mostly my general boredom with life. I’m over it now, I drink every now and again still, but it’s usually with friends again, hardly ever solo, and if it is, it’s not nearly as much and is pretty rare
You are so smart. I hope your good choices are steadily strengthening you and giving you good health.
I got clean after a while in rehab, then right after I got back my dad died and my mom kicked me out, and then I relapsed.
It felt so good being sober, I've actually never felt better, but it's like I'm afraid of being in that better state again.
I hear you. When I was sober it was the sharpest and best I had felt in a long time. I started again around the breakdown of my relationship and afterwards I got deep again. The fear of doing better is real. The fear of doing the work and abstaining only for life to happen and things to turn sour is hard to overcome. Some might think it’s ridiculous to be afraid of having that stability and self-control, but for those of us who feel we can see the bad two steps ahead of the good at all times it’s just not so. Keep on pushing, man, because with all this being said, you have the power to remain and to find peace again. We can’t control what happens to us but we can control where we go from there, and despite what you might think about yourself through all of this, I think you deserve to go towards the path of stability and love for yourself.
This might have sounded stupid, but I feel like I just know that feeling too. All the best to you
For the first time in my life I was jogging when sober. It felt good I felt good but went back. I dont know why we do it last night I drank 10 hard ciders and spent today vomiting. I wish I could capture that feeling of sobriety and want it instead of the brief buzz of alcohol.
I often think for long periods of time about my own addictions, especially to weed and alcohol. Alcohol and drugs are a way to escape myself. Its also an excuse to do thing one normally wouldnt. Addiction and drug abuse is a scary thing.
Great video man. Really appreciate it. I love Hemingway. He is by far my favorite author. What is your favorite book? Mine changes a lot depending on my mood. Top 3 for me are: The Sun Also Rises, A Moveable Feast, and For Whom The Bell Tolls.
the hero vs villain also mirrors some aspects of borderline personality disorder/or just splitting in general very interesting!
Bipolar Disorder and BPD are actually sometimes misdiagnosed for each other which is a HELLISH meme tbh, bc bipolar needs meds by default and BPD needs VERY different therapy LUL but it deffo makes sense bc of the similarity in plenty of symptoms.
@@nicoles3166 its hilarious, after i commented i was thinking the exact same thing, but i didnt feel like editing my comment bc sometimes it feels extra yanno XD he had a lot of trauma, and with a genetic disposition for Bipolar, a neurological condition, combined with trauma enough to wiggle his way into a BPD diagnosis which is The Suck, is just. wow. i kinda respect him for living so long with such suffering internally. same with the book, it sounds like a good read.
At 51, I can finally see the greatness in Hemingway's work, especially the short stories. Amazing! Fitzgerald might have been an even heavier drinker. There's a fine book titled "Alcohol and the Writer."
Right now I am reading "For whom the bell tolls" and in it, there is a constant underlying motif about how alcohol is objectively bad and is the reason for many deeds of evil in the world, and in many cases, it is what defines a person as bad, even though they are good apart from it. Yet the main character, who is on a secret mission arguably (or maybe even obviously) is a borderline alcoholic. I just think it is interesting how he embraces the fact that he is an alcoholic, yet he is still "good" or at least trying to be.
I don't know if it will play some major parts in the rest of the book as I am only about halfway through, but nevertheless, there's that.
Yes. What a wonderful and colorful life yet marked by emptiness. I have read two of his books and was moved by his terse simplicity and depth.
My great grandfather was actually Ernest Hemingway's fishing buddy. I have lots of stories that were passed down through my grandfather about him.
Was hoping you might share.
Perfect timing. During the lockdown of 2020 through early 2021 a phenomenal amount of people whom on returning after long hiatus to their jobs in the workforce had come back with an Alcohol or\& Drug addiction.
Ironically a vast majority of these people before Lockdown had no history of substance abuse.
Love your channel Sisyphus !
It makes me doubt sometimes, is it essential for an adult to drink alcohol in order to live a non-depressed life? Not addiction obviously, but is it impossible for a person to live an adult life without having alcohol at all? I am not an adult yet and am currently at least slightly depressed and was confused about it, I know it only hides the pain and doesn't make it actually go away but from the way it's represented in media and from how almost everybody around me drinks, it makes me think that I would HAVE to drink by the time I leave college in order to be a functional member of society
@@kuroki2986 No, you don't have to drink. Shoot for happiness without the crutch that is alcohol. Any fool can turn to the bottle for temporary relief and then wind up dependent on it. It takes a real man to learn how to weather the ups and downs of life without alcohol. That said, don't be afraid to have a couple occasionally, in social settings. There were a couple alcoholics in my family, but fortunately for me, the stuff just tastes terrible, even lower % alcohol stuff like beer and wine, and I find the couple hours of mild euphoria to be totally not worth it. After that effect wears off, you'll be lower than you've ever been. That's the nature of any drug that boosts the feel-good neurotransmitters. And alcohol is toxic so physically you won't feel quite right even if you only had one drink. Drink a significant amount and you're gonna be pretty much useless for the next few hours. Anyway, I'm sure there are plenty of successful people who never touch the stuff. Seems logical to me as successful people have less reason to use it.
I definitely understand the destructive nature of alcoholism and the importance of either responsibly regulating your habit or being completely sober, but I must say I do find it frustrating just how hard it is to find a proper substitute for the looseness and freedom of thought and action that comes with being drunk in a positive mindset. I just can’t get that way properly within a sober mindset no matter how much I try.
I didn't realise I had a drinking problem until only recently, so this video is pretty timely.
Thanks Sisyphus
Hope that you have found Alcoholics Anonymous or another support group so that you can walk away from your drinking problem and towards a healthier life.
My grandfather was a functional alcoholic for most of his life and my family has always taked it quite humourosly, so I was never very empathetic towards alcoholics, and I personally always preferred weed and LSD but damn alcohol has a way of getting to you. I'm about to turn 28 and I never had the habit of drinking, I only did it every once in a while because I've never been a party person neither, but after the pandemic I'm in dire straits and going through a heartbreak and alcohol does have a way to numb the pain, it has a way to soothe you and confort you and make you feel energized and good and confident, specially when you're as alone as I am, with no emotional support from nobody alcohol can make it easier to go through all that stuff. I'm nohwere near Hemingway's alcoholism but I do see now that the drink has a sneaky way to make you feel that you need it, it's definitely some dangerous stuff.
Call it what ya like. It's you who has to remember the pain. Nobody does the work but yourself.
I read a book of short stories by Hemingway a few years ago and wow does his writing create imagery in your mind! Great writer and great drinker. When you're a creative person, the world is very different from others and usually more dark than most people can see. I can attest to that statement being a life long and career musician. Sometimes us creatives need a bigger bandage than most to cover our wounds.
Hemingway was a great short story writer. Indian Camp!
We are so traumatized, so wounded...no one can judge how someone else chooses to medicate themselves. I see people who are morbidly obese, pointing a finger at an alcoholic, weed smoker, or junkie, while turning a blind eye to their own addiction. We need to be compassionate. We're all hurt. If you're not wounded, consider yourself blessed. Incredibly blessed.
I agree.
I didn't knew a lot about Hemingway's life, but the way you showed his story with a background focused on mental health, addiction and how art portrays the artist's struggle but also their hope reminded me of Mac Miller
😂 just no.
@@NirtieDigger i think it’s really important for younger generations to make connections between classics and the artists of their generation. it helps them a) understand the connection between life and art and b) explore meaning deeper than plot points.
there’s no need to be hateful, and i’m glad this guys taking the time to learn and make connections.
@@toadsmoss I think it's offensive to Hemingway to compare him to mac miller, it's like comparing a Ferrari to a kids tricycle. And secondly literally none of macs songs are about struggling with alcohol or addiction. Yeah he had addictions but NONE of his songs portray that, not to mention hes one of the worst rappers of our generation.
@@NirtieDigger i’m not a mac fan, so no input on his music but i am a lit teacher ! the best way to get kids interested is by letting them make connections to what they know, like artists they like, even if that connection isn’t something we see. the great thing about mental connections is that they’re based on experience and experience is something that’s unique to one person and one person alone. this goes for literature and music. it’s interpreted differently by everyone. so while you can think his connection is out of place, i don’t think it constitutes being rude. i hope you have a great day and learn something new ❤️
@@NirtieDigger You should hear Self Care. One of the saddest songs in recent history I think. He's completely aware he's dying but is powerless to stop it.
Came for info. on Hemingway, but stayed for the insightful discussion of addiction. Very thoughtful and wise presentation. Thank you.
Just as a note, I decided to quit smoking a while back by finishing a session, realizing I really wanted to quit, threw away any nicotine items I owned and have been nicotine free since. Everytime I've wanted to smoke or had the opportunity, given a few minutes to think about it, I told myself "Quit, quit, quit, quit, etc." And was able to remember that I wanted to quit before I was hopelessly pulled into purchasing more. It sounds dumb, but it worked for me. For quite a while, I was also an alcoholic (about 5 years, drinking several times a day) and massively cut back almost accidentally. Accepting that I had a problem years ago, but finally cut back by... just not buying and drinking it... Maybe I just don't have a very addictive personality, but I find the description to be lacking. I am still depressed, and life is hard, but it is better without the constant inebriation .
If you quit and your life improves, you're not an addict. If you quit and your life gets worse, you're an addict.
Worse of course is a subjective term, but addiction is a coping mechanism. Kind of like whether or not a person can walk if you take away their crutches.
I can't speak to your personal experience except to say I'm really happy you were able to quit the way you described.
@@scottyc5116 first off, thanks a ton, I appreciate it, it wasn't the first time I tried and perhaps not the last, but it feels good to be sober.
And also, I think your quality of life definitely plays into the addiction, but I do think that addicts can see the objective effects of their addiction on their life and choose to find other coping mechanisms over their addiction. Speaking for myself alone, singing and trivia nights have been great help with coping.
Everyone talking about their experiences with alcohol and here I am addicted to coffee. I have taken alcohol but I can wait for months for my next alcoholic drink. But If I miss one day of coffee the anxiety and headache is horrible. I want out of this.
I find Zizek's analysis interesting. After I became an atheist, I withdrew from almost all my family and friends, and drinking was one of the few things left in my life that I enjoyed, and I seriously wondered if I was an alcoholic. The more I thought about it, the more I realized the main reason I drank was because drinking and partying were the first things I fell in love with doing after loosing my religion. Even worse, it's one of the few things I genuinely enjoy that I could at least occasionally do with other people (99.99% of the people I know are religious) without them looking at me funny. Then it it hit me; the real reason I drink is because it's safer if everyone around me thinks I am the way I am because of drink. If they knew it was really a religious issue, I could be dead right now.
Its strange when you think about the core reason for one’s drinking. To me its an ego boost. I feel sexy and masculine. So its my lack of self confidence that often pushes me to drink.
Also I really enjoy the taste of most beer, wine, and cocktails. I wish I didnt have a taste for such things.
Good luck with you. Thanks for sharing
Sucks that you have to mask it like that and feel like the people around you aren't capable of rational conversation, what country are you in may I ask?
Move. It will change your life to be around people who are more like you. Just stay away from cunty people. Atheists who only care about atheism suck. Find some people who like things you do, philosophy, video games, biking, whatever it is, find cool people. I don't get why ppl just dont move if u feel alone, what do you got to lose man! Much love, and I hope you find what you are looking for!!! Stay beautiful my friend!
You gotta do what we used to call "grow a pair" bud
@@gabrielpalma1687
that's a random thing to say here and sounds like projection from you
I got sober back in November from alcohol, weed, and tobacco, and I can say. It’s not been easy, but it’s a lot better now
Alcohol I can take it or leave it, weed the same. But cigarettes, man that's tough.
I would absolutely love a video on the life and philosophy of Charles Bukowski
this is also a pretty good break down of how bipolar disorder might have been perceived before we had a proper way to process how we function. its very sad, but like. Damn. what a relatable story. i never knew this stuff about him and im just sitting here nodding along like "oh my god he went through the same emotional stuff i do but had NO support" among many other tragic things. like wow. wow. this is amazing.
"An addict is like a successful person in reverse."
I can't for the life of me remember where this was from , I seem to recall it was from a TED talk but not sure at all, but I think about it any time I think about addictions
The old school mindset of what a man was kept US from ever rising to the level we aspired to. The simple act of NOT PICKING UP THE BOTTLE lifts me BEYOND that level every day....to the level of a HUMAN, just BEING.
Ernest Hemingway didn't fight in the Spanish Civil War. He was an ambulance driver in WWI, which inspired him to write A Farewell to Arms. He was a war correspondent in the Spanish Civil War. It was his inspiration for For Whom the Bell Tolls.
FACTS!
Meaning he might not have been *in* the trenches - but he was close enough to get the reek of death in his nose.
He also worked for the U.S. government as some sort of spy, whatever the USA had before the CIA, during the Spanish Civil war.
@@quentinle4892 Hemingway had a unique fate… volumes to understand from his life and work, exceptionally brave.. May he rest peacefully ever🙏
The whole music score to this video is amazing
Thanks for making this. My father was an alcoholic and I think this video helped me to understand his demons a little better.
This is so beautiful and well put together. Thank you.
I just started "The Old Man and the Sea"
Nice video. I am glad I stopped drinking. Best decision I ever made. I still have ups and downs, but now I know where I stand.
I feel very connected to Hemmingway in a lot of ways. This was definitely a great dive into him and his alcoholism. Good job
A true alcoholic can never moderate successfully for long only complete abstinence will work to stay stopped it is easier to stay sober than it is to get sober
I feel for this man thank you for the video it was good 👍🏻
Even before I knew anything about Hemingway's drinking, he always sounded like a barfly to me. A 'barfly' spends many hours every day hanging around bars, they tell stories to other barflies and the other barflies reply with their own stories, the barfly goes to another bar and repeats the stories he heard from other barflies as though they are his own stories. Over the years a barfly develops a rich repertoire of stories to make himself sound like a man with wide experience of life when all he has actually done is hang around bars. To me, Hemingway's writing sounds like the musings of a barfly.
So before you even knew he drank a lot his musing sounded like those of a barfly. How is this possible? Are you saying that you can tell, from the stories he relates to you, whether or not a man is a barfly? What type of stories then, are required to raise your suspicions concerning his honesty and integrity, giving you the impression that you're in the presence of a barfly, and you're just hearing the stories he heard in a bar? Time isn't something I like to waste, so if I'm hearing a story about alligator hunting in the Louisiana bayou from a man I know nothing about, I don't want to come off as a pretentious and pompous asshole, instantly dismissing his claims with some "insight" I pulled out of my ass, I want to know for sure, like you, that he's just a barfly, saving me a lot of time, so any information on how to judge people in this manner would be greatly appreciated.
Too bad he traveled hella bullfighted skiid hunted flew planes all dat
@@SwagMuffin567 --- SURE . . . SURE . . . TOURISTS FIGHT IN WARS. SURE. . . .| but Hemingway did not do those things, he created his own legend, by loitering about THE REAL THING, real fishermen, real bullfighters, real soldiers, like a tourist; he drove an ambulance in a war zone, he DID NOT FIGHT in a war, because he was not a soldier in an army. Hemingway was a guy of many costumes, sorta kinda like the Murican militiamen. If you want the real thing, read T.E. Lawrence who QUIETLY walked the walk.
@@marianotorrespico2975 Lawrence is still read by smart military officers... And Hemingway is still read by boring alcoholics ☝️
@@kxkxkxkx --- Correct.
His granddaughter or great grand daughter wrote a good book called Out Came The Sun. It gives a lot of insight into how their family is still being affected.
He was sensitive enough to notice a lot. It's in his writing. And I guess a lot of what he noticed he didn't like, couldn't change, and was inside himself, and, well, nothing like a manly, fairly socially acceptable, readily available, antianxiety medicine'. It does change things temporarily. A little vacation. Something for the end of the day, or earlier. He and his books' characters were my heroes growing up. Thanks, Earnest.
.i needed to hear this, looked at the date and this video literally came out 2 hours ago
For anyone trying to quit, here are the three steps that have allowed me to kick any addictions I've had.
1. Know why you are quitting. For me, it was because I wanted to be proud of myself.
2. Understand that when you relapse, you are not relieving yourself from stress in life but increasing it.
3. Withraval pains may last couple days, but then you are free.
Sounds like the damage is done
point one is good.
@@cruiser6260 grow up
The old man and the sea will forever be my favorite book
I have all the signs and am aware that it is the single biggest problem in my life. If I try, I stay sober a couple days, then think basically "whatever, who cares, I can do what I want", and then drink for several days. Slowly starting to accept that it´s going to kill me.
Try AA
I’m an 8.5 year meth addict 5.5 months clean. A lot of what you said in this clip rang very true for me
I’ve always thought addiction was such a strange thing, and when you quite it’s even worse. It feels like you’re running in a way that you almost trip and fall but you have to keep catching yourself, you’re stuck balancing while sprinting full pace ahead. Art is like the inverse personally, once you start you have to keep going or else it might disappear, that cool idea you had might not be done. It’s hard to do though when you can’t find the motivation to start.
Hi nNoodl, you may find this interesting. ua-cam.com/video/ZqlTSCvP-Z0/v-deo.html
quit
I know I'm being greedy, but I desperately need you to talk more about addiction. Thank you for this.
Speaking as an addict: this is pretty spot on
This could be the greatest video ever uploaded to UA-cam. For so many reasons I have not yet realised.
Outstanding work by Sisyphus 55 here like always 🔥✊✨
BTW, take it from a person who has seen first hand substance abuse problems and the downfalls. You must fight your bad addictions sooner than later, because your life may very actually depend on it no matter how small or big the addiction. Don't give up that fight, you can halt these bad habits. ❤️
I smoke weed on and of since I was 15 (10years now) through all up's and down's in my life this habbit never left me..I had times where I smoked once a week and other times I smoked every evening a few joints.
I think this video helped me to understand addiction better since I'm struggling lately to keep my fingers of
Just my 2 cents. I’m not a psychologist, I’m not a research scientist either. But I have close family members, my cousin who struggles with alcoholism and smoking, my brother who struggles from even stronger alcoholism, my childhood life growing up around drug addicts, and now in my college life where during pandemic one of my room mates became addicted to meth. So, I have a lot of experience around addiction and in that way I live through them.
I myself never struggled with addiction. But I have goals, motivation. I used to smoke, but I got into the hobby of weight lifting. Excessive drinking and smoking got in the way of that. So I stopped and it was easy. What I wanted was stronger than my need to smoke.
My cousin and brother including my room mate had no hobbies. They worked dead end jobs with no goal or attempts to better their lives. I think this somehow plays into addiction. I have no credibility but I don’t think I’m wrong.
You're probably not wrong in that probably contributes to unhealthy choices
Brother, you are onto something. Having a "thing" that is. That you can see the predisposition is gold. Knowing you grew up with inconsistency in emotion, hots and colds I'm guessing. Just look at Trump as a teetotaller and his brother dying from alcoholism.
Growing up with addiction is a real test on one's resilience. Good luck staying on the right path. All strength to you.
Yup! Gotta have a purpose!! But I know people with good lives and a purpose who still hit the bottle.
@@Daveyboy10053 Then they may still be motivated and positive. Instead of depressed and filled with despair.
Punishing yourself, however, with alcohol, is not a good sign. Socialising with alcohol, can be uplifting, but drowning sorrows alone is another kettle of fish.
I swear the algorithm knows me. Yesterday I said I would stop drinking and then this video show up in my feed. It always does this, the algorithm is reinforcing my efforts with knowledge that will eventually be created. 🤣
Where you pointed out his poor interpersonal relationships were a potential catalyst for his drinking, I agree, however, I think it may be slightly different in nature than one would assume. It is not the lack of interpersonal relationships alone that cause one to fall into despair and turn to the bottle, it's not having them for long enough to look upon them externally with a critical eye, and see just how shallow and meaningless relationships really are. You reach a point where you realise that even if you found a lover/companion, it really amounts to nothing more than wasted time and potentially creating a new human with all the same shit to deal with that you had in your life.
If you are too much of a coward to end your life, or perhaps you can't because there are still those in the world who love you, and you don't want to hurt them. What else can you do, but drink? Drinking is a great way to speed up time while also numbing the effects of existing.
Ive been a daily to semi drinker since about 19 and never really took it out of hand , Since covid and going back to school at 25 hit me at the same time I have noticed because of the stress of school ive been more attached to drinking than normal .
Hola Sisyphus, espero que hayas tenido un hermoso fin de semana. Me encantan tus videos!! Me han ayudado tanto durante esta pandemia de mierda, muchas gracias por lo que haces!
Watching this while tipsy. Tried being sober but failed after the long boredom eight months in. I'm an addict plan and simplem. I can't wait to stop and I am always postpoinng when that will be. I don't drink as much as some other people who manage better but I know that doesn't actually make it okay deep down indside. Cheers!
Alcoholism is weird I joined a fraternity and would drink every day then after a few weeks I noticed I was drinking to drink not for fun so that made me stop after a few weeks and that was the worst week ever
Good on ya. Alcohol is hella tough as it's both psychologically and physiologically addictive. Hope you're good
I feel I need to watch this through again several times, I've never been drawn to alcohol or drugs as a substance to lean on, but I have other addictive non healthy behaviours, and that bit about hope keeping us in the addiction really rang true with me, as I often think to myself at some point in the future I will get healthy and refrain from these distructive coping mechanisms, but then decades so by...no change, but the intention to change ever present.
I'd like to know; how do people cope with difficult feelings once their crutch of choice is removed? If knew that then giving up wouldn't be so difficult! I keep meaning to read Gabour Maté's book on addiction as I've seen interesting videos of him talking about how all addictions are harmful eg. workaholism and things like shopping addiction, gambling, body picking/ plucking, self harm, food addiction etc. All the things people do to numb out from their/our pain. I just thought I'd mention it in case it helps anyone. I also think Johann Hari has done a good book on addiction too, as well as his bk on depression. All the best everyone battling on in the daily struggle.
I got to addicted status cuz of the toxic "worry" my family had. Bunch of hypocrites. I wanted to prove they didn't actually care but were projecting their anger about our alcoholic father onto me. I kept drinking which in a way proved both of us right in hindsight, but I'll leave with this...
They would ask me almost daily if I had a drink or would treat as if I had regardless. Been sober over two months now and they never ask or talk about it anymore and sometimes I struggle to keep the train going. Just funny how they were more involved before and not after when that's when involvement should really be focused on
So glad to think that you have walked away from stupid alcohol. What a waste of time and money it is! It's a shame that you feel your family care for you less now. You may find that it helps to ask them questions about their lives and how they are going. Also I hope that you can find other ways to connect with other people e.g. by going bushwalking or playing table tennis or joining a book club.
the production quality improving every video is literally so insane !! love all your content
“soon this itself becomes the addiction and you’ve found a way to ‘keep smoking’ in good conscience”
the tragedy of addiction
Thanks to post this and atrract attention into addiction and mental health overall. In order to be an alcoholic or addicted to anything else (be it work, a person, drugs, etc) one need to be first a neurotic (in the wide, often disused term) which comprises many neuroses or disorders like narcissism, etc. It's basically a sick ego. The AA self help program works by reducing the ego of the sick person after he has accepted that he's sick and needs treatment. I am almost 5 years sober thank God. Cheers y'all.
I used to care about self improvement in my 20's. Now I am 30 and feel totally content with my mundane existence. Someone turns a light out in us after the 20's end.
Edit: I am two weeks sober and wow this comment of mine from only 9 months ago is depressing.
My interest in philosophy and self improvement only seems to get stronger as I age and realise my time is wasting away
30s is young. Seriously 30 years old is so young
More like lights on. Self improvement masturbation makes me sick.
My light was turned off somewhere between the ages of 19 and 20