Respecting elders is one of traditional values in Chinese history. Ancient people have strong moral character. Thus, your etiquette and attitude will reflect your inner world.
No Name Thank you for bringing up this topic. I think since we were originally created by the creator (造物主 或 老天爷), so we definitely should respect our creator as priority, then we should respect our ancestors (敬天祭祖). Actually, all humans should be following this golden principle. However, since the communism was imported to China from Russia a century ago, step by step, the CCP used movements after movements, it changed and destroyed traditional Chinese culture in people's heart and new generations nowadays no longer understand what is traditional values, and many important human principles, such as 敬天信神, 善恶有报...many concepts had been lost it's original meaning and purpose. And all these are caused by the CCP through education by brainwashing people in China for decades. Today, people openly against their ancestors and even disrespect our creator. The CCP forced Chinese people carries communism ideology, in order to destroy the soul of Chinese as well as all mankind. As we knew, if a nation’s traditional values and culture are destroyed, then this race can be announced “died”, because they lost their most fundamental root, therefore, this is really a serious issue! We, as Chinese, should put our efforts to bring back our traditional values and culture, we should say ‘No’ to the communism evil party. The communism had brought too many troubles and disasters, and it has harmed so many nations during past century, it is time for everyone to realize this issue. The time all of us against this evil party, the time the CCP will no longer exits in this human world! Thus, Chinese will have real freedom!
@@KaiDiization I'm English. I agree with you completely. It may surprise you that 60 years ago I was brought up with almost exactly the same rules. None of my family had any contact with, or knew anything about Chinese culture. We prepare & serve our food differently. For us it was don't play with cutlery, Banging cutlery on the table was incredibly rude (I wouldn't have dared to do it). Wouldn't dream of eating until everyone had sat down, Mum would say "shall we start?" & it was always the older people & guests who were served & started 1st.Otherwise exactly the same. To amuse you, I needed to ask a young Chinese lady to move from her seat to let me off the train at my station, but didn't know if she spoke English (I usually meet tourists). I have never seen anyone move so fast & with such good grace. To show my appreciation I gave a broad smile, said "thank you" & gave a small bow in my poor attempt to show my respect & admiration for her. She then gave me 2 full Chinese bows (hands together). True I'm quite grey, but I was very surprised, & uplifted to recieve such great respect. I've met many Russian Orthodox Christian people from most countries in the former Soviet Union.(As you know under Bolshevik communism christianity was a criminal offense - long sentences in labour camps = slow death, or execution.) They had preserved their culture despite all. At the buffet meal after the service (2 hours) the children were outstandingly well behaved both at table, & then obviously really enjoyed playing together, "vibrant", but remarkably quietly & unobtrusively. Chinese people, please, please keep your culture, traditions & good moral values. We have completely lost ours in England from a different "cultural revolution" in the late 1960's. It came through the media, movies, TV, "pop music/idols", celebrities, material aquisitions, became the new "gods". I agree with you completely, that when we lose respect & consideration for each other, society dies, & our hearts turn to stone. I think that the English could do with a few lessons from traditional Chinese (& Russian) people.
Etiquette does not reflect on your inner world and moral. It only shows how much you conform to Etiquette, niceties and norms. In Chinese history, there were many nobles, emperors and dowagers that practised good etiquette but their moral were questionable. Try to imagine a rough Chinese warrior without-etiquette which has a strong sense of loyalty and righteous. We are actually living in a world where socially nice people has good character while those otherwise are not good.
@@Yuzhou08 "To maintain the morality of human beings, there are times when enlightened beings or prophets are born in the human world to rectify people’s hearts and lead civilizations to develop and mature. Such sages include Moses and Jesus of the Near East, Lao Tzu in China, Sakyamuni in India, and Socrates in ancient Greece. Human history and culture help people to understand what Buddhas, Taos, and gods are; what it means to believe in God; and how to practice cultivation. The different schools of practice teach what is righteous, what is evil, and how to distinguish truth from falsehood and good from evil. They teach man to await the Creator’s return to Earth before the end of the world, in order that he may be saved and return to Heaven. Once people sever their connection with the divine being that created them, their morality will quickly deteriorate. Moral corruption ultimately leads to the end of civilized life. In the East, especially in the ancient land of China, beliefs are rooted in the hearts of people through traditional culture, handed down through the millennia. Therefore, it is difficult to deceive the Chinese people into accepting atheism with simple lies. In order to uproot China’s five thousand years of beliefs and culture, the communist specter used violence on a mass scale to slaughter the elites who had inherited the traditional culture. The communists then used lies to deceive young people from generation to generation. In the West and other parts of the world, religions and faith are the means of maintaining contact between man and the divine, and are important cornerstones for maintaining moral standards. Although the evil specter failed to establish communist tyranny in these countries, it achieved its goal of destroying orthodox religions and corrupting human beings through deception, deviance, and infiltration." －－[How the Specter of Communism Is Ruling Our World (Chapter Six: The Revolt Against God)]
Here's the ones that I find still more prominent today: Minor: Slouching. You still get called out, but usually a minor reminder. Medium: Playing with chopsticks. Medium: Fidgeting. Shaking your feet is really bad. Medium: Greet all your non-nuclear family elders (aunt, uncles etc). Then if new elders visit that house, stop what you are doing in whatever room and go greet them in the main room. This is more severe for Chinese people, but I don't think anyone cares that foreign person doesn't know to do this. Severe: Picking specific things in a dish. I've once seen a foreigner only pick out the chicken from a mixed dish like Kungpao chicken. It was really weird I didn't even realize that was an option until then. Medium: Eating before your elders when it's not just the nuclear family. The more familiar you are with the extended family elder the less it's a problem. Severe: Eating before a grandparent. Even if your a foreigner, its going to be really awkward for everyone. Other things in the video I've occasionally heard about but is not a big deal among any family members I know.
Ugh helloooo??? Ever heard Chinese people eating?? LOUD!!! Shove food straight from the bowl and loudly. Slurp of noodles and the sound of cows chewing... lip smacking
@@quyenluong3705 majority have horrible eating etiquettes. Even young people. An exclassmate from Chengdu shove food straight from a plate. He literally raised the big plate close to his mouth, and shoved. Then the way they smack their lips 吧唧嘴
I’m British, and grew up in the 70s, we had to ask permission before leaving the dinner table, and it was very bad form not to finish your food (especially understandable since both my parents knew rationing. My father also insisted we never turn our noses up at food without trying it once. In Britain we usually make tea in cups or mugs, it is modern etiquette to always check if anyone else wants tea or coffee before going to make some.
I think it's similar now although things have definitely changed. I was born in 2001 but I do fear there are aspects of our culture that are slowly fading, such as the examples you gave. Cultures do change and develop over time, but not always for the best. A lot of people in my generation don't really care for politeness or etiquette.
Our family, and indeed area of the UK, was similar. I can still hear the lunch supervisor at school calling ""elbows off the table". Being polite costs nothing, it's about treating others in the way you'd want to be treated yourself.
I saw so many flashbacks to my childhood as my family taught me a lot of these etiquette rules. A lot of them were unspoken, like the ones about your demeanor, but there are ones that were definitely taught over and over again, especially the slouching one! (I am horrible and have slouched a lot since moving away from my family)
I just showed this to my son. He’s seven and he thinks your rules are very good. He was under the impression that Chinese people don’t like Americans so I showed him your videos and asked him if he though you were against us. He said “No she seems nice!” I also pointed out how many of your rules are similar to our rules here. Thank you for the random social studies lesson ❤️
I can't speak for the Chinese, howeverr, i think the majority of people who don't like Americans (regardless of nationality) actually don't like the loud American tourists to their country. Tourists (from all countries) should know that they represent the country they come from and their bad behavior paints their country in a very bad light. Personally I'm impressed with how proud Americans seem to be of their country, or of being American. In my country it is rare to see someone proud of being from here.
@Sapphire Camui the majority of people online? Yeah. But as an American who speaks other languages, knows people from outside of my country, I can tell you that it's not the majority of people who hate Americans. It's a very mixed reception, I'll give you that, but that's about it. Whenever someone says what you just said, it's pretty obvious that you don't know much outside of your sphere.
Some of these are ones my Chinese teacher taught me. The crossed leg one is especially funny and difficult to comply with for me because in my families (English/Irish) etiquette is that you gently cross your ankles so that they sort of tuck under your chair. Doing that also stops me from fidgeting so much because it reminds me where my feet are😅☺️ great video!
I agree. But unfortunately there are many people in today’s world who think it is their right to insult other people just because they are older than them. Especially among the western people but not too uncommon in the eastern people either.
I grew up in a southern family in Arizona. We are mixed family but anyway a custom i was raised on was that when you have a guest you are supposed to offer them a drink. If Southeast is usually sweet tea southwest however it's usually water or coffee. This comes from cowboys who traveled great distances so whenever a cowboy approaches the camp of another cowboy then it was polite to offer them something because they traveled a ways and are most likely tired from their travels. There is even a story of the infamous Jesse James who repayed an old ladies kindness by saving her farm from being taken by the bank. The kindness she showed them was offering them food, water and a place to sleep during a terrible storm and although Jesse James was an outlaw he still had a high sense of etiquette when it came to asking for kindness and returning the kindness. Think Robin Hood if that makes it easier to understand.
Regarding respect to elders (and I'm an elder to everyone in my family and in my workplace): An old European custom was such that no one touched his/her food until the lady who prepared the food (it was usually the lady or woman of the house) had taken her first bite. The stereotype is that, after she took her first bite of food, it was a free-for-all to grab and wolf down whatever was on the table. In the USA it is polite custom to offer one's seat (on a bus or other public transportation) to a lady; in Korea one offers one's seat to an elder (pregnant women remain seated, often in a special part of the bus reserved for them).
It's always interesting how the VAST majority of these are applicable to Western etiquette. Generally human beings find the same things unpleasant or pleasant. Etiquette is based in consideration towards others, especially table manners. The simple act of pointing the spout away from someone may be based in not spilling tea directly on someone if the pot gets tipped or just making it easier for the other person to use the handle when they want to pour.
This etiquette is so interesting! I have never actually known that Chinese people still practice etiquette (because of the cultural revolution) but I am very happy that it has survived!
10 common house rules in America today: Always say please and thank you Always be kind Complete homework before playing Put things back where you found them Clean up plates after eating Have dinner together as a family No phones at the dinner table Help carry in the groceries No shouting No going to bed angry 25 basic house rules: 1. We are a family, first and foremost 2. Mom and Dad are in charge. Period 3. You will respect everyone who lives here. Always 4. Rules are rules, they are not general guidelines 5. Life is not always about you, sometimes it is about others 6. You are not expected to be perfect, therefore, you may not expect perfection from others, even Mom and Dad 7. Sometimes grace is extended, but grace is not to be expected 8. If you don’t have something nice to say, just keep it shut 9. You are expected to respond or acknowledge when you are spoken to, ear buds or not 10. If you want to add something to the family calendar, you need to give plenty of notice 11. If you are caught lying about something, you will receive twice the consequences. Being honest is always your best option 12. Man or woman, girl or boy, you are expected to keep your word 13. If your plans have changed, you need to tell Mom or Dad as soon as they change 14. It does not matter to us what happens in the lives of your friends. This is your life - you live here 15. There are plenty of times to have a discussion, you may always speak your mind - as long as you do it in a respectful way 16. When someone is speaking, they have the floor 17. If you would like privileges, you will need to fulfill your responsibilities 18. If you want to borrow something, you will need to ask & not just take it 19. When you borrow something, you will need to return it as you found it and to where you found it 20. There is no maid who lives here 21. If you make a mess, clean it up 22. When you take something out, put it back 23. If you take the last of something, tell the person who needs to know 24. If you break something, you will be involved in the fixing or replacing process 25. Electronics are a privilege, not a right
I love your videos. As a foreigner still learning about Chinese culture, I realise that there are many differences with my own culture (French). And most of the time, I do it wrong only because I didn't know it could be wrong. I didn't realise that some things are so important. I see a comment about being picky with food, but at my house we always do it. If there is a mixed dish, each person will eat what they prefer in it. It is normal here and better than having food that you won't like. Even if we always learned to try a little of everything. I will be more careful of my doings when I visit Chinese friends.
Since Chinese eat dishes from communal platters, it's rude to root around just to find the piece you like. First, it's inconsiderate since somebody else might want to eat that too and second it's gross. However, you can kind of cheat by going straight for the piece, just don't eat all of it, leave some for the other diners 😁 Nuclear families are usually less formal, in my family we'll encourage our loved ones to take the pieces they like and offer it to them :)
I was taught 'no lying' too! truth comes out eventually. I personally value keeping promises. If I ever have a child, I'll teach them these 2 lessons for sure. Not slouching is a good lesson, haha. They tried teaching me this, but they failed. Sleeping without a pillow though helps with improving posture. Regarding the tea ceremony, not filling the cup all the way is practical: fewer chances of spilling the cup when taking it up to drink if it's filled at 70/80% instead of 100%. Not pouring something to the outside also has a practical aspect. Your hanfu is so pretty! this style makes me think of the kimono a lot. I first got familiar with the kimono, and yes, i know that the hanfu inspired/influenced the kimono a lot. I'm so glad i discovered your channel. I hope you'll still upload!
I am Australia. I grew up in the 70's. Our rules were - wait until everyone was at the table before eating; close your mouth when chewing; don't talk with your mouth full of food.Dont chew loudly. Don't fidget at the table. Don't start dessert until Mum returned to the table after serving dessert. Ask permission to leave the table. Eat everything on your plate or no dessert. Clear away your cutlery and crockery after you finish eating. I taught my children to do these things too.
Greetings to all, This video was extremely informative and helpful. I enjoyed watching and learning proper etiquette from another culture. Thank you so much. I must say that the idea of filling a cup only 70% is something I have always believed and highly preferred all my life! It is frustrating to see a cup filled to the brim. I am relieved to know that I'm not alone in this position!
I have always thought the small Chinese gesture of taking the best morsel of food and placing it on the rice of your grandmother, father, son, guest etc is such a beautiful way to show honor, affection and respect. The way my Chinese friends' mothers always want me to eat to the point of blowing up is a reminder of my own Romanian grandmother and mother's way of showing how much they love and appriciate family, friends and guests by sharing favored meals. These things remind me that no matter where your family comes from, or what they look like, we are all very much the same.
Unfortunately the cultural revolution and communism destroyed much of the traditions, so a lot of Mainlanders were simply never taught. It still survives with Chinese communities outside the mainland, and some of it is trickling back to the mainland. Of course some people who grew up in "rough" households were also never taught.
She is giving examples of manners that ppl expecting from the ANCIENT world, till today my family still practicing all the manners that she mentioned and lots more that she didn't mention, and I am Malaysian Chinese whose family left China for at least 400 years. And of course, unfortunately, not all are from that kind of family, even during [Kong Zi] that period of time. you don't expect farmers or fishermen's families to practice all those manners. They do practice some manner but not as detail as the scholar. That's why we take it very seriously. It's called 家教 aka home educated, the manners that your school will not teach you. it also shows what kind of family background you are from with every little detail of manners that you are practicing.
Edwin Voon ? I don’t know where you live in a China but from central places I’ve lived in China, Beijing, Shanghai, etc. You have to learn these things. So I don’t know where you got those facts from but try not to sound biased.
@@jasonhuang6078 Confucius was a very fastidious man. He was very big on how a proper man should appear and behave. Confucius took pains to have his clothes be clean, and would not even sit on his mat unless it was straight. He was very particular about the food he ate, and how it was prepared and presented. Which is why I have a difficult time understanding why many Chinese ignore or are oblivious to his dictates on how to be a proper person. While cleanliness was important to Confucius, this was not a quality that many Europeans found amongst the Chinese during the 19th century, and even into the 20th. The comparison with the Japanese was made often enough. Staying in a Japanese inn for instance was a very different affair from one in China. It really wasn't until the Communist take over that the country began a nationwide campaign to clean itself up, and to curb unhygienic habits like spitting, which the Chinese indulge in.
I’m Indigenous from Canada and the respect your elders is huge I honestly feel bad I haven’t been up to par with my morals! I’m hoping to learn from this
As an Anglo-Australian I was brought up with many of the same values! For instance, when we sit at the table, we mustn't start eating before everybody has sat down and my mother has indicated that it's ok to start eating. We also mustn't leave the table without saying "excuse me" (if brief to get something) or "may I leave the table please?" if finishing dinner. And as far as eating sounds go, we were always taught never to eat with your mouth open, and never talk with your mouth full. If you absolutely MUST say something, cover your mouth with a serviette and keep it as brief as possible. Also, I was always told off for slouching as a child by my dad. And as far as leaving and returning the house goes, it goes without saying to say goodbye and hello to my parents when leaving and entering. When guests come we must greet them too. And of course, no playing with utensils at the dinner table, whether those utensils are chopsticks or a knife and fork! And serving drinks to others before ourselves is also a must. If we want to refill our glass, we must first offer to fill up everyone else's glasses before ours - even if there isn't enough drink left for our own glass afterwards. If there is some food left on the table and we want it, you first have to ask everybody else if they would like it. If they say yes and take it, too bad! But most of the time they will refuse and let you have it out of politeness, even if they want it - the point is just that you have to ask first to show consideration to everybody else, so even if you offer eveyrone else the last piece of food you'll still likely get it. And if we want food from the other side of hte table, we have to ask someone to please pass it to us. No reaching over either. It seems like a lot of these etiquette values very much reach across cultures! However, my family were always strict with manners and etiquette. A lot of other Australian families are a lot slacker. But no matter where you're from, good manners goes a long way and is appreciated by everybody no matter where they're from or how they were brought up.
Hello, i personally love your Chinese Etiquette teaching skills and fully appreciate how you promote this. I am a Royal Etiquette trainer myself in China and admire your passion!, Keep up the great work!
This was so interesting :) I wish more people would bring up their children like this. I have no doubt that unless people from America; (which is where I'm from), and possibly some other countries, were to be taught before they went; we would make many mistakes while visiting China. I would love to hear more of your etiquette rules and thanks again for the interesting video :)
I feel like most of these etiquette (or "savoir-vivre") rules apply to my Québécois family. The most striking example what not pointing the teapot at someone - it's like wishing them ill or causing bad luck for them. Thanks for sharing!
I was taught all these things on my fathers side of the family and its not as different in a Filipino household, respect your elders, speaking softly etc. And i was taught if your not sure of what customs the household has NEVER hesitate to politely ask. Asking is better than guessing. 🥰💕
I always sit with cross legs I never thought that it is a sort of bad manners. thanks for making such a wonderful video it was the first time that I was watching your video. I enjoyed it a lot, Love from chitral
I have only just found this, wonderful. I was brought up in england and my mother was obviously trying to bring up a polite chinese girl not a noisy, busy, clumsy english daughter. She is 97 now!
What you just show is exactly how my whole family is brought up being educate on etiquette behavior, we meet elders who were both pleased and surprise by the way we behave!! Thank you ally wang!!! Keep up the good work!!!! P.S: I enjoy the bad behavior skit from you too!!! 🤣🤣🤣
This is fascinating. I just found out I have Chinese ancestry so this video is quite informative. I want to learn as much about my Chinese heritage as my other ethnic heritages.
I found a lot of the things in this video very similar to was I was taught as a child in America... many years ago, now. I think innate dignity and self respect are commonalities that change little from culture to culture, and can be built on. I was very fortunate to grow up a wanted and loved child, and filial piety has played a very large role in my life. After I was widowed, I moved back in with my parents to care for them as they aged. I moved 800 miles because my mother wanted to after my father died, leaving everything and everyone I ever knew behind. I'm quite proud that even after my mother had to be moved to assisted living when I could no longer care for her on my own, I moved into an apartment building directly next door so that I could continue to see her until the day she died. Both my parents were wonderful people who deserved to be treated as well as I was able. Not everyone is as fortunate as I was.
This is so strange compared to how I grew up! I feel like all children should be taught this because it is the simple things that can make people behave rudely. Most of the points in the video I never really thought of and just kind of do on instinct
It always drove me crazy how my American friends wouldn't inform my family whenever they'd try to leave. I'd try to subtly remind them to say goodbye and avoid having my parents feel offended by pausing and informing my family that a friend is leaving so they'd look over and my friends can say goodbye themselves. Also, I always inform my friend's parents that I'm leaving before I do, I think some of them questioned me why I did that one time haha
Just found this vid and I loved it. Astonishingly, most (almost all) of the good manners you mentioned are values I was taught in an Anglo-Saxon Canadian family! I've been called out for most of these when I was growing up (including respect for elders) and one that you didn't mention, if you're in a room with elders, you should not speak until or unless spoken to. You do not leave the room without asking permission. I guess good manners are kind of universal, nice to know. Thanks for sharing!
The one on the 5:30 reminded me of something. My mom always told me, and she still tells me that, you should never point a knife to someone when putting it down.
We are studying the beautiful Chinese culture this month as part of our homeschool. Thank you for sharing these etiquette pointers and for giving such a great insight into your rich culture.
Growing up as a kid in Jamaica, we had to observe ALL of these rules, and more. For example, no elbows on the dinner table, always opening doors for women and elders, always giving up your seat for women and elders, always wash before dinner (especially hands and face), always address elders as Miss/Mrs/Mr or at the very least as Sir/Ma'am (it's very poor manners to call an older person by his/her first name!). I remember once in Sweden hearing my best friends (Swedish) calling their parents, aunts and uncles by their first name. This was perfectly acceptable behavior and no one felt the least bit offended. I couldn't even begin to imagine the ramifications of calling my aunt or my grandmother by their first names. This would have triggered an international crisis of epic proportions, not to mention thousands of dollars in phone bills!
Well said Miss Ally ⭐️👏🏼 A person with really good manners is a joy and a treasure. Everybody appreciates manners and responds to them, even if politeness seems to be a dying art in today’s unmannerly world. Being polite is actually quite easy, it’s not rocket science, and will bring you esteem, affection and trust in your circle of friends and colleagues.
Wanted to share some basic chinese manners used in my family, which was passed down from my grandparents. (And some of these are thought in our moral classes, yes we do have moral classes in school 道德教育课, normally in primary or kindergarten) DAILY: Severe: Slouching, if youre in other people's home, slouching is not a good idea. 太放肆, if youre in your home, that could be minor-medium? But it doesnt look good when other people is around. Severe: Fidgeting the leg, looks very uneducated. Like a beggar. If you really want to fidget, only do it without anyone else is around. Severe: Greeting or parting other family members, its a must. To show that you respect them. Severe: Letting elderly know that you had gone out or come back home. Severe: Never enter a person's private room, without permission. Its not your home. TABLE MANNERS: Severe: Invite and wait for elderly to eat first only you start. Especially grandparents or elder relatives. A bonus, if you know that the food is nice or elder's favourite, pick the food for them and place it in their plate, (best) with your untouched chopsticks or other utensils. Medium-Severe: Sticking chopsticks or eating utensils upright in the bowl. Like praying to the God. Some people are okay with it, but mostly arent. Severe: Playing with food or utensils, Its a no no, very bad table manners. (Even kids are not allowed to fool around the dinner table, not to mention adults). If adults do this, its perceived as child-like behavior. Severe: Picking specific food from the dish. Its a no no again, if you really want to pick a specific food, do it in a way that is not obvious, like scooping up a part of the dish where the specific food you want is located. Never pickup the food and put it back (like choosing a vegetable in a wet market). Nobody wants to eat your saliva-touched food. Severe: Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly. Its basically disgustingly uneducated, and perceived like an animal. Severe: Sucking your teeth...(why...do it in the toilet or something, theres a mirror for you too) Medium: Clanking and clinking of plates or eating utensils, i know its hard, but try to avoid it. So, eat slowly. Severe: Never gather/take too much food served on the table into your plate, only take a good small portion of food to your plate, when you had finished only get some more.
As far as “Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly”, I’ve noticed quite a large number of Chinese people doing that. I assumed it wasn’t looked down on, because it seems to be so common.
I recently transferred to a school where many of the students are from China! I was really interested in learning about the culture so this really helped!
Your format and presentation are simple, informative, and professional. I'm trying to learn Mandarin. I have been too focused on the language. I need to improve my display and understanding of Chinese culture, customs, and courtesies.
Thank you so much for the great video. I just subscribed. This makes me want more videos of your great tips. We especially need more videos about respecting older siblings and respecting parents to share them with the young people in our family and let them learn some traditions. Thank you!
I’ve learned a lot of this rules from my grandmother. Even close the door quietly. But in modern times people stamp you as shy if you behave like that.
This is a really helpful video! Thank you :) Maybe there are some special etiquette tips for foreigners too? Next year I plan to go visit my best friend and her family in China and I am worried, because I want to make a good impression on her parents!
just follow the ones in the videos, you should be fine, or here some tips I had known. Wanted to share some basic chinese manners used in my family. DAILY: Severe: Slouching, if youre in other people's home, slouching is not a good idea. 太放肆, if youre in your home, that could be minor-medium? But it doesnt look good when other people is around. Severe: Fidgeting the leg, looks very uneducated. Like a beggar. If you really want to fidget, only do it without anyone else is around. Severe: Greeting or parting other family members, its a must. To show that you respect them. Severe: Letting elderly know that you had gone out or come back home. Severe: Never enter a person's private room, without permission. Its not your home. TABLE MANNERS: Severe: Invite and wait for elderly to eat first only you start. Especially grandparents or elder relatives. A bonus, if you know that the food is nice or elder's favourite, pick the food for them and place it in their plate, (best) with your untouched chopsticks or other utensils. Medium-Severe: Sticking chopsticks or eating utensils upright in the bowl. Like praying to the God. Some people are okay with it, but mostly arent. Severe: Playing with food or utensils, Its a no no, very bad table manners. (Even kids are not allowed to fool around the dinner table, not to mention adults). If adults do this, its perceived as child-like behavior. Severe: Picking specific food from the dish. Its a no no again, if you really want to pick a specific food, do it in a way that is not obvious, like scooping up a part of the dish where the specific food you want is located. Never pickup the food and put it back (like choosing a vegetable in a wet market). Nobody wants to eat your saliva-touched food. Severe: Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly. Its basically disgustingly uneducated, and perceived like an animal. Severe: Sucking your teeth...(why...do it in the toilet or something, theres a mirror for you too) Medium: Clanking and clinking of plates or eating utensils, i know its hard, but try to avoid it. So, eat slowly. Severe: Never gather/take too much food served on the table into your plate, only take a good small portion of food to your plate, when you had finished only get some more.
@@Ancestorsss The English and French etiquette say the same things !! Excepting that if you wear a mini-skirt, you have to cross you legs when sitting in a certain way that people do not see your underwear. Also, in a staircase, men always pass before women. When entering a room, a gentleman always let a lady come in first.
@@FiveThousandYears Hihi, I'm Russian and we don't allow shoes inside either :) In fact, your grandma would likely tear your legs away if you even think of entering the house with your outside shoes on.
It's weird because a lot of these are used in my culture (apart from serving tea a certain way and waiting for elders to eat first, I think...), but most don't come naturally to me at all. It's not really a big deal at home and I hardly ever think about it (I might think about ethics but not really etiquette), but now I wonder if many people do when in public or if it's just with them subconsciously. If it's a subconscious thing, that explains my awkwardness, home or abroad. :/
Respecting elders is one of traditional values in Chinese history. Ancient people have strong moral character. Thus, your etiquette and attitude will reflect your inner world.
No Name Thank you for bringing up this topic. I think since we were originally created by the creator (造物主 或 老天爷), so we definitely should respect our creator as priority, then we should respect our ancestors (敬天祭祖). Actually, all humans should be following this golden principle.
However, since the communism was imported to China from Russia a century ago, step by step, the CCP used movements after movements, it changed and destroyed traditional Chinese culture in people's heart and new generations nowadays no longer understand what is traditional values, and many important human principles, such as 敬天信神, 善恶有报...many concepts had been lost it's original meaning and purpose. And all these are caused by the CCP through education by brainwashing people in China for decades. Today, people openly against their ancestors and even disrespect our creator. The CCP forced Chinese people carries communism ideology, in order to destroy the soul of Chinese as well as all mankind.
As we knew, if a nation’s traditional values and culture are destroyed, then this race can be announced “died”, because they lost their most fundamental root, therefore, this is really a serious issue!
We, as Chinese, should put our efforts to bring back our traditional values and culture, we should say ‘No’ to the communism evil party. The communism had brought too many troubles and disasters, and it has harmed so many nations during past century, it is time for everyone to realize this issue. The time all of us against this evil party, the time the CCP will no longer exits in this human world! Thus, Chinese will have real freedom!
@@KaiDiization I'm English. I agree with you completely. It may surprise you that 60 years ago I was brought up with almost exactly the same rules. None of my family had any contact with, or knew anything about Chinese culture. We prepare & serve our food differently. For us it was don't play with cutlery, Banging cutlery on the table was incredibly rude (I wouldn't have dared to do it). Wouldn't dream of eating until everyone had sat down, Mum would say "shall we start?" & it was always the older people & guests who were served & started 1st.Otherwise exactly the same.
To amuse you, I needed to ask a young Chinese lady to move from her seat to let me off the train at my station, but didn't know if she spoke English (I usually meet tourists). I have never seen anyone move so fast & with such good grace. To show my appreciation I gave a broad smile, said "thank you" & gave a small bow in my poor attempt to show my respect & admiration for her. She then gave me 2 full Chinese bows (hands together). True I'm quite grey, but I was very surprised, & uplifted to recieve such great respect.
I've met many Russian Orthodox Christian people from most countries in the former Soviet Union.(As you know under Bolshevik communism christianity was a criminal offense - long sentences in labour camps = slow death, or execution.) They had preserved their culture despite all. At the buffet meal after the service (2 hours) the children were outstandingly well behaved both at table, & then obviously really enjoyed playing together, "vibrant", but remarkably quietly & unobtrusively.
Chinese people, please, please keep your culture, traditions & good moral values.
We have completely lost ours in England from a different "cultural revolution" in the late 1960's. It came through the media, movies, TV, "pop music/idols", celebrities, material aquisitions, became the new "gods".
I agree with you completely, that when we lose respect & consideration for each other, society dies, & our hearts turn to stone.
I think that the English could do with a few lessons from traditional Chinese (& Russian) people.
@@judithafholland This is very encouraging, thank you!
Etiquette does not reflect on your inner world and moral. It only shows how much you conform to Etiquette, niceties and norms. In Chinese history, there were many nobles, emperors and dowagers that practised good etiquette but their moral were questionable. Try to imagine a rough Chinese warrior without-etiquette which has a strong sense of loyalty and righteous. We are actually living in a world where socially nice people has good character while those otherwise are not good.
@@Yuzhou08 "To maintain the morality of human beings, there are times when enlightened beings or prophets are born in the human world to rectify people’s hearts and lead civilizations to develop and mature. Such sages include Moses and Jesus of the Near East, Lao Tzu in China, Sakyamuni in India, and Socrates in ancient Greece.
Human history and culture help people to understand what Buddhas, Taos, and gods are; what it means to believe in God; and how to practice cultivation. The different schools of practice teach what is righteous, what is evil, and how to distinguish truth from falsehood and good from evil. They teach man to await the Creator’s return to Earth before the end of the world, in order that he may be saved and return to Heaven. Once people sever their connection with the divine being that created them, their morality will quickly deteriorate. Moral corruption ultimately leads to the end of civilized life.
In the East, especially in the ancient land of China, beliefs are rooted in the hearts of people through traditional culture, handed down through the millennia. Therefore, it is difficult to deceive the Chinese people into accepting atheism with simple lies. In order to uproot China’s five thousand years of beliefs and culture, the communist specter used violence on a mass scale to slaughter the elites who had inherited the traditional culture. The communists then used lies to deceive young people from generation to generation.
In the West and other parts of the world, religions and faith are the means of maintaining contact between man and the divine, and are important cornerstones for maintaining moral standards. Although the evil specter failed to establish communist tyranny in these countries, it achieved its goal of destroying orthodox religions and corrupting human beings through deception, deviance, and infiltration." －－[How the Specter of Communism Is Ruling Our World (Chapter Six: The Revolt Against God)]
And the prettiest Chinese lady in the world was found to make this presentation.
Here's the ones that I find still more prominent today:
Minor: Slouching. You still get called out, but usually a minor reminder.
Medium: Playing with chopsticks.
Medium: Fidgeting. Shaking your feet is really bad.
Medium: Greet all your non-nuclear family elders (aunt, uncles etc). Then if new elders visit that house, stop what you are doing in whatever room and go greet them in the main room. This is more severe for Chinese people, but I don't think anyone cares that foreign person doesn't know to do this.
Severe: Picking specific things in a dish. I've once seen a foreigner only pick out the chicken from a mixed dish like Kungpao chicken. It was really weird I didn't even realize that was an option until then.
Medium: Eating before your elders when it's not just the nuclear family. The more familiar you are with the extended family elder the less it's a problem.
Severe: Eating before a grandparent. Even if your a foreigner, its going to be really awkward for everyone.
Other things in the video I've occasionally heard about but is not a big deal among any family members I know.
Very solid points :)
Ugh helloooo??? Ever heard Chinese people eating?? LOUD!!! Shove food straight from the bowl and loudly. Slurp of noodles and the sound of cows chewing... lip smacking
chincho rrito not all Chinese are like that. My family has strict rules on table etiquette.
@@quyenluong3705 majority have horrible eating etiquettes. Even young people. An exclassmate from Chengdu shove food straight from a plate. He literally raised the big plate close to his mouth, and shoved. Then the way they smack their lips 吧唧嘴
@@chinchorrito1251 its cos most etiquette was lost during the cultural revolution
When you serve a tea cup to elderly you serve it with two hands. That's what my dad taught me.
And pour or serve the guest/elderly first before yourself
@@dbrzy8989 that sounds appropriate in any culture imo
@@kekt536 should be but probably not
@@Ciana_Baby this is the kind of comment that is bad in ant culture. Even among animals.
I remember getting scolded when I hand things with one hand in general, because its impolite.
I’m British, and grew up in the 70s, we had to ask permission before leaving the dinner table, and it was very bad form not to finish your food (especially understandable since both my parents knew rationing. My father also insisted we never turn our noses up at food without trying it once. In Britain we usually make tea in cups or mugs, it is modern etiquette to always check if anyone else wants tea or coffee before going to make some.
Same, I always cringe when I see people putting elbows on tables or starting to eat before everyone is sat down etc
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I think it's similar now although things have definitely changed. I was born in 2001 but I do fear there are aspects of our culture that are slowly fading, such as the examples you gave. Cultures do change and develop over time, but not always for the best. A lot of people in my generation don't really care for politeness or etiquette.
Our family, and indeed area of the UK, was similar. I can still hear the lunch supervisor at school calling ""elbows off the table". Being polite costs nothing, it's about treating others in the way you'd want to be treated yourself.
Wow I like Chinese etiquette. Very attractive and Honourable
I saw so many flashbacks to my childhood as my family taught me a lot of these etiquette rules. A lot of them were unspoken, like the ones about your demeanor, but there are ones that were definitely taught over and over again, especially the slouching one! (I am horrible and have slouched a lot since moving away from my family)
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
You need enough muscle tissue on your back to hold your spine upright. Without access to food and exercise, you would by necessity slouch.
I just showed this to my son. He’s seven and he thinks your rules are very good. He was under the impression that Chinese people don’t like Americans so I showed him your videos and asked him if he though you were against us. He said “No she seems nice!” I also pointed out how many of your rules are similar to our rules here. Thank you for the random social studies lesson ❤️
I can't speak for the Chinese, howeverr, i think the majority of people who don't like Americans (regardless of nationality) actually don't like the loud American tourists to their country. Tourists (from all countries) should know that they represent the country they come from and their bad behavior paints their country in a very bad light.
Personally I'm impressed with how proud Americans seem to be of their country, or of being American. In my country it is rare to see someone proud of being from here.
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
@@sapphirecamui6447 its taught from a young age to be proud of America so you don't question authority
@Sapphire Camui the majority of people online? Yeah. But as an American who speaks other languages, knows people from outside of my country, I can tell you that it's not the majority of people who hate Americans. It's a very mixed reception, I'll give you that, but that's about it. Whenever someone says what you just said, it's pretty obvious that you don't know much outside of your sphere.
Some of these are ones my Chinese teacher taught me. The crossed leg one is especially funny and difficult to comply with for me because in my families (English/Irish) etiquette is that you gently cross your ankles so that they sort of tuck under your chair. Doing that also stops me from fidgeting so much because it reminds me where my feet are😅☺️ great video!
This video is most appreciated; such manners should become standard universally.
Although it's a good video, I wouldn't say all of them should become standard. Especially universally.
@@jlipcomb1369 Agreed.
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
respect for elders should be something the whole world does
I agree. But unfortunately there are many people in today’s world who think it is their right to insult other people just because they are older than them. Especially among the western people but not too uncommon in the eastern people either.
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@@BlackSakura33 I agree, but some people who are older don't deserve automatic respect just because they're old.
elders are ass
I agree
I grew up in a southern family in Arizona. We are mixed family but anyway a custom i was raised on was that when you have a guest you are supposed to offer them a drink. If Southeast is usually sweet tea southwest however it's usually water or coffee. This comes from cowboys who traveled great distances so whenever a cowboy approaches the camp of another cowboy then it was polite to offer them something because they traveled a ways and are most likely tired from their travels. There is even a story of the infamous Jesse James who repayed an old ladies kindness by saving her farm from being taken by the bank. The kindness she showed them was offering them food, water and a place to sleep during a terrible storm and although Jesse James was an outlaw he still had a high sense of etiquette when it came to asking for kindness and returning the kindness. Think Robin Hood if that makes it easier to understand.
Regarding respect to elders (and I'm an elder to everyone in my family and in my workplace): An old European custom was such that no one touched his/her food until the lady who prepared the food (it was usually the lady or woman of the house) had taken her first bite. The stereotype is that, after she took her first bite of food, it was a free-for-all to grab and wolf down whatever was on the table.
In the USA it is polite custom to offer one's seat (on a bus or other public transportation) to a lady; in Korea one offers one's seat to an elder (pregnant women remain seated, often in a special part of the bus reserved for them).
It's always interesting how the VAST majority of these are applicable to Western etiquette. Generally human beings find the same things unpleasant or pleasant. Etiquette is based in consideration towards others, especially table manners. The simple act of pointing the spout away from someone may be based in not spilling tea directly on someone if the pot gets tipped or just making it easier for the other person to use the handle when they want to pour.
It's common sense but many a times it's not very common
This etiquette is so interesting! I have never actually known that Chinese people still practice etiquette (because of the cultural revolution) but I am very happy that it has survived!
10 common house rules in America today:
Always say please and thank you
Always be kind
Complete homework before playing
Put things back where you found them
Clean up plates after eating
Have dinner together as a family
No phones at the dinner table
Help carry in the groceries
No shouting
No going to bed angry
25 basic house rules:
1. We are a family, first and foremost
2. Mom and Dad are in charge. Period
3. You will respect everyone who lives here. Always
4. Rules are rules, they are not general guidelines
5. Life is not always about you, sometimes it is about others
6. You are not expected to be perfect, therefore, you may not expect perfection from others, even Mom and Dad
7. Sometimes grace is extended, but grace is not to be expected
8. If you don’t have something nice to say, just keep it shut
9. You are expected to respond or acknowledge when you are spoken to, ear buds or not
10. If you want to add something to the family calendar, you need to give plenty of notice
11. If you are caught lying about something, you will receive twice the consequences. Being honest is always your best option
12. Man or woman, girl or boy, you are expected to keep your word
13. If your plans have changed, you need to tell Mom or Dad as soon as they change
14. It does not matter to us what happens in the lives of your friends. This is your life - you live here
15. There are plenty of times to have a discussion, you may always speak your mind - as long as you do it in a respectful way
16. When someone is speaking, they have the floor
17. If you would like privileges, you will need to fulfill your responsibilities
18. If you want to borrow something, you will need to ask & not just take it
19. When you borrow something, you will need to return it as you found it and to where you found it
20. There is no maid who lives here
21. If you make a mess, clean it up
22. When you take something out, put it back
23. If you take the last of something, tell the person who needs to know
24. If you break something, you will be involved in the fixing or replacing process
25. Electronics are a privilege, not a right
I love your videos. As a foreigner still learning about Chinese culture, I realise that there are many differences with my own culture (French). And most of the time, I do it wrong only because I didn't know it could be wrong. I didn't realise that some things are so important. I see a comment about being picky with food, but at my house we always do it. If there is a mixed dish, each person will eat what they prefer in it. It is normal here and better than having food that you won't like. Even if we always learned to try a little of everything.
I will be more careful of my doings when I visit Chinese friends.
Since Chinese eat dishes from communal platters, it's rude to root around just to find the piece you like. First, it's inconsiderate since somebody else might want to eat that too and second it's gross. However, you can kind of cheat by going straight for the piece, just don't eat all of it, leave some for the other diners 😁 Nuclear families are usually less formal, in my family we'll encourage our loved ones to take the pieces they like and offer it to them :)
do you mind sharing the differences? I'm really curious and wanted to know more about other cultures.
Love your videos and your awesome outfits!
Thank you CiCi!
I'm here because my English teacher told us that we make an activity like this video... I'm Happy, I like the Chinese culture
Thank you, I had the habbit sometimes to stick thr Chopsticks into the rice. Know I know it, and shall remember it.
I believe everyone should have these rules. Not only because I grew up with them, society as a whole would probably be a little better
a more considerate and equally respected community
I was taught 'no lying' too! truth comes out eventually. I personally value keeping promises. If I ever have a child, I'll teach them these 2 lessons for sure.
Not slouching is a good lesson, haha. They tried teaching me this, but they failed. Sleeping without a pillow though helps with improving posture.
Regarding the tea ceremony, not filling the cup all the way is practical: fewer chances of spilling the cup when taking it up to drink if it's filled at 70/80% instead of 100%. Not pouring something to the outside also has a practical aspect.
Your hanfu is so pretty! this style makes me think of the kimono a lot. I first got familiar with the kimono, and yes, i know that the hanfu inspired/influenced the kimono a lot. I'm so glad i discovered your channel. I hope you'll still upload!
I am Australia. I grew up in the 70's. Our rules were - wait until everyone was at the table before eating; close your mouth when chewing; don't talk with your mouth full of food.Dont chew loudly. Don't fidget at the table. Don't start dessert until Mum returned to the table after serving dessert. Ask permission to leave the table. Eat everything on your plate or no dessert. Clear away your cutlery and crockery after you finish eating. I taught my children to do these things too.
Respect your civilized traditions.. And our indians traditions are also same to you like 5000 years before...amazing.. 🙏🇮🇳
I'm going to teach my children these because i age with all of these
I need to teach my kids these..... so many of these even I forget..
Thank you . The way you explain things with your calm and soothing voice is awesome. Love it.
Etiquette isn't as emphasized as much anymore so I'm glad there's a video like this 😄😂
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
This is such a wonderful channel. I think the best thing I can do for Ally, and to promote Han Culture, is to share this. ❤️
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
Your videos are so calming and relaxing. I love watching you. Thank you for this.
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
I'm african american and a lot of these rules are basics shared within my family, especially ones related to respecting elders.
I think taking care of other people's things more than your own is what I learned from my mother 💕💜☺️😀
we need to help promote her channel. The good things need to be unveiled.
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
Greetings to all,
This video was extremely informative and helpful. I enjoyed watching and learning proper etiquette from another culture. Thank you so much.
I must say that the idea of filling a cup only 70% is something I have always believed and highly preferred all my life! It is frustrating to see a cup filled to the brim. I am relieved to know that I'm not alone in this position!
You look like a fantasy princess,Chinese style is so gorgeous!
I have always thought the small Chinese gesture of taking the best morsel of food and placing it on the rice of your grandmother, father, son, guest etc is such a beautiful way to show honor, affection and respect. The way my Chinese friends' mothers always want me to eat to the point of blowing up is a reminder of my own Romanian grandmother and mother's way of showing how much they love and appriciate family, friends and guests by sharing favored meals. These things remind me that no matter where your family comes from, or what they look like, we are all very much the same.
Hmm not sure how to deal with "being loud in public places". Maybe some Chinese tourists should watch this video.
Unfortunately the cultural revolution and communism destroyed much of the traditions, so a lot of Mainlanders were simply never taught. It still survives with Chinese communities outside the mainland, and some of it is trickling back to the mainland. Of course some people who grew up in "rough" households were also never taught.
She is giving examples of manners that ppl expecting from the ANCIENT world, till today my family still practicing all the manners that she mentioned and lots more that she didn't mention, and I am Malaysian Chinese whose family left China for at least 400 years.
And of course, unfortunately, not all are from that kind of family, even during [Kong Zi] that period of time. you don't expect farmers or fishermen's families to practice all those manners. They do practice some manner but not as detail as the scholar.
That's why we take it very seriously. It's called 家教 aka home educated, the manners that your school will not teach you. it also shows what kind of family background you are from with every little detail of manners that you are practicing.
Edwin Voon ? I don’t know where you live in a China but from central places I’ve lived in China, Beijing, Shanghai, etc. You have to learn these things. So I don’t know where you got those facts from but try not to sound biased.
This is why Professor Penguin Ling from the Tsinghua University of Chinese Ritual Studies has been launching campaigns to revive Chinese rites.
@@jasonhuang6078 Confucius was a very fastidious man. He was very big on how a proper man should appear and behave. Confucius took pains to have his clothes be clean, and would not even sit on his mat unless it was straight. He was very particular about the food he ate, and how it was prepared and presented. Which is why I have a difficult time understanding why many Chinese ignore or are oblivious to his dictates on how to be a proper person. While cleanliness was important to Confucius, this was not a quality that many Europeans found amongst the Chinese during the 19th century, and even into the 20th. The comparison with the Japanese was made often enough. Staying in a Japanese inn for instance was a very different affair from one in China. It really wasn't until the Communist take over that the country began a nationwide campaign to clean itself up, and to curb unhygienic habits like spitting, which the Chinese indulge in.
I’m Indigenous from Canada and the respect your elders is huge I honestly feel bad I haven’t been up to par with my morals! I’m hoping to learn from this
As an Anglo-Australian I was brought up with many of the same values! For instance, when we sit at the table, we mustn't start eating before everybody has sat down and my mother has indicated that it's ok to start eating. We also mustn't leave the table without saying "excuse me" (if brief to get something) or "may I leave the table please?" if finishing dinner. And as far as eating sounds go, we were always taught never to eat with your mouth open, and never talk with your mouth full. If you absolutely MUST say something, cover your mouth with a serviette and keep it as brief as possible. Also, I was always told off for slouching as a child by my dad. And as far as leaving and returning the house goes, it goes without saying to say goodbye and hello to my parents when leaving and entering. When guests come we must greet them too. And of course, no playing with utensils at the dinner table, whether those utensils are chopsticks or a knife and fork! And serving drinks to others before ourselves is also a must. If we want to refill our glass, we must first offer to fill up everyone else's glasses before ours - even if there isn't enough drink left for our own glass afterwards. If there is some food left on the table and we want it, you first have to ask everybody else if they would like it. If they say yes and take it, too bad! But most of the time they will refuse and let you have it out of politeness, even if they want it - the point is just that you have to ask first to show consideration to everybody else, so even if you offer eveyrone else the last piece of food you'll still likely get it. And if we want food from the other side of hte table, we have to ask someone to please pass it to us. No reaching over either. It seems like a lot of these etiquette values very much reach across cultures!
However, my family were always strict with manners and etiquette. A lot of other Australian families are a lot slacker. But no matter where you're from, good manners goes a long way and is appreciated by everybody no matter where they're from or how they were brought up.
Indeed, those are wonderful family values, and these traditional values will benefit generations by generations.
Exactly the same in my African American family
Hello, i personally love your Chinese Etiquette teaching skills and fully appreciate how you promote this. I am a Royal Etiquette trainer myself in China and admire your passion!, Keep up the great work!
I like table manners of chinese, thanks i learn something new
This was so interesting :) I wish more people would bring up their children like this. I have no doubt that unless people from America; (which is where I'm from), and possibly some other countries, were to be taught before they went; we would make many mistakes while visiting China. I would love to hear more of your etiquette rules and thanks again for the interesting video :)
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
I feel like most of these etiquette (or "savoir-vivre") rules apply to my Québécois family. The most striking example what not pointing the teapot at someone - it's like wishing them ill or causing bad luck for them. Thanks for sharing!
This is what my mom taught me since childhood, so many rules for sitting and eating politely, but now I feel it's all for my benefit 😁😁
It's funny because I was like 90% of those rules in my French -very frenchy- family.
Thank you for sharing this!
I love the tradition and dressing and everything!!! I love your channel
I was taught all these things on my fathers side of the family and its not as different in a Filipino household, respect your elders, speaking softly etc. And i was taught if your not sure of what customs the household has NEVER hesitate to politely ask. Asking is better than guessing. 🥰💕
I really loved the video 😄 I hope you do more Chinese etiquette videos in the future.
I always sit with cross legs I never thought that it is a sort of bad manners. thanks for making such a wonderful video it was the first time that I was watching your video. I enjoyed it a lot, Love from chitral
I have only just found this, wonderful. I was brought up in england and my mother was obviously trying to bring up a polite chinese girl not a noisy, busy, clumsy english daughter. She is 97 now!
Your so pretty and I love watching your videos, they are very helpful and informational!!! Thank you!!!
What a graceful video!
What you just show is exactly how my whole family is brought up being educate on etiquette behavior, we meet elders who were both pleased and surprise by the way we behave!! Thank you ally wang!!! Keep up the good work!!!!
P.S: I enjoy the bad behavior skit from you too!!! 🤣🤣🤣
This is fascinating. I just found out I have Chinese ancestry so this video is quite informative. I want to learn as much about my Chinese heritage as my other ethnic heritages.
Hi👋I have a similar video if you are interested: ua-cam.com/video/GH8eP6UzOGg/v-deo.html
Absolutely love this video! What I learned is "Do not do unto others what you would not want them to do unto you."
I found a lot of the things in this video very similar to was I was taught as a child in America... many years ago, now. I think innate dignity and self respect are commonalities that change little from culture to culture, and can be built on. I was very fortunate to grow up a wanted and loved child, and filial piety has played a very large role in my life. After I was widowed, I moved back in with my parents to care for them as they aged. I moved 800 miles because my mother wanted to after my father died, leaving everything and everyone I ever knew behind. I'm quite proud that even after my mother had to be moved to assisted living when I could no longer care for her on my own, I moved into an apartment building directly next door so that I could continue to see her until the day she died. Both my parents were wonderful people who deserved to be treated as well as I was able. Not everyone is as fortunate as I was.
Thank you for sharing your touching stories.
This is so strange compared to how I grew up! I feel like all children should be taught this because it is the simple things that can make people behave rudely. Most of the points in the video I never really thought of and just kind of do on instinct
It always drove me crazy how my American friends wouldn't inform my family whenever they'd try to leave. I'd try to subtly remind them to say goodbye and avoid having my parents feel offended by pausing and informing my family that a friend is leaving so they'd look over and my friends can say goodbye themselves. Also, I always inform my friend's parents that I'm leaving before I do, I think some of them questioned me why I did that one time haha
Just common sense good manners.Thank you Ally.
Exactly! Just normal good manners. Nothing weird, except those with the eating sticks which we do not have!
@@MyCristinaM True, but I do think you should refrain from calling the chopsticks "weird". It has a negative connotation behind it
respecting elderly is really heart touching
Just found this vid and I loved it. Astonishingly, most (almost all) of the good manners you mentioned are values I was taught in an Anglo-Saxon Canadian family! I've been called out for most of these when I was growing up (including respect for elders) and one that you didn't mention, if you're in a room with elders, you should not speak until or unless spoken to. You do not leave the room without asking permission. I guess good manners are kind of universal, nice to know. Thanks for sharing!
Also common in afro-caribbean households
The one on the 5:30 reminded me of something. My mom always told me, and she still tells me that, you should never point a knife to someone when putting it down.
We are studying the beautiful Chinese culture this month as part of our homeschool. Thank you for sharing these etiquette pointers and for giving such a great insight into your rich culture.
The way you do the things you're not supposed to is somehow quite attractive to me. Especially when you know the right way.
Great video 😁
💐. Xie, xie, Thank you so much for each of your wonderful videos! ♥️ 🙏 🙋
Growing up as a kid in Jamaica, we had to observe ALL of these rules, and more. For example, no elbows on the dinner table, always opening doors for women and elders, always giving up your seat for women and elders, always wash before dinner (especially hands and face), always address elders as Miss/Mrs/Mr or at the very least as Sir/Ma'am (it's very poor manners to call an older person by his/her first name!). I remember once in Sweden hearing my best friends (Swedish) calling their parents, aunts and uncles by their first name. This was perfectly acceptable behavior and no one felt the least bit offended. I couldn't even begin to imagine the ramifications of calling my aunt or my grandmother by their first names. This would have triggered an international crisis of epic proportions, not to mention thousands of dollars in phone bills!
Really helpful for all cultures. These are very important to follow in our daily life.
The information is authentic and presented properly.
excellent tips.
I'm embarrassed to have made some of those errors in the past, so it was fun to see you address them.
I really love Chinese culture and I'm learning a lot about it. # Love from Manipur
Very informative thanks for this ❤️
Thank you! You taught me many things that I didn’t know! You taught me a lot more manners!
Well said Miss Ally ⭐️👏🏼 A person with really good manners is a joy and a treasure. Everybody appreciates manners and responds to them, even if politeness seems to be a dying art in today’s unmannerly world. Being polite is actually quite easy, it’s not rocket science, and will bring you esteem, affection and trust in your circle of friends and colleagues.
I recognise a lot of these traditions from my asian side, from my grandmother. I enjoyed watching the video, thank you.
actually the specific etiquette you've listed is mostly similar in my specific house etiquette in Poland
that's a cool thing to see ^^
Your English is amazing!
Wanted to share some basic chinese manners used in my family, which was passed down from my grandparents.
(And some of these are thought in our moral classes, yes we do have moral classes in school 道德教育课, normally in primary or kindergarten)
DAILY:
Severe: Slouching, if youre in other people's home, slouching is not a good idea. 太放肆, if youre in your home, that could be minor-medium? But it doesnt look good when other people is around.
Severe: Fidgeting the leg, looks very uneducated. Like a beggar. If you really want to fidget, only do it without anyone else is around.
Severe: Greeting or parting other family members, its a must. To show that you respect them.
Severe: Letting elderly know that you had gone out or come back home.
Severe: Never enter a person's private room, without permission. Its not your home.
TABLE MANNERS:
Severe: Invite and wait for elderly to eat first only you start. Especially grandparents or elder relatives. A bonus, if you know that the food is nice or elder's favourite, pick the food for them and place it in their plate, (best) with your untouched chopsticks or other utensils.
Medium-Severe: Sticking chopsticks or eating utensils upright in the bowl. Like praying to the God. Some people are okay with it, but mostly arent.
Severe: Playing with food or utensils, Its a no no, very bad table manners. (Even kids are not allowed to fool around the dinner table, not to mention adults). If adults do this, its perceived as child-like behavior.
Severe: Picking specific food from the dish. Its a no no again, if you really want to pick a specific food, do it in a way that is not obvious, like scooping up a part of the dish where the specific food you want is located. Never pickup the food and put it back (like choosing a vegetable in a wet market). Nobody wants to eat your saliva-touched food.
Severe: Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly. Its basically disgustingly uneducated, and perceived like an animal.
Severe: Sucking your teeth...(why...do it in the toilet or something, theres a mirror for you too)
Medium: Clanking and clinking of plates or eating utensils, i know its hard, but try to avoid it. So, eat slowly.
Severe: Never gather/take too much food served on the table into your plate, only take a good small portion of food to your plate, when you had finished only get some more.
As far as “Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly”, I’ve noticed quite a large number of Chinese people doing that. I assumed it wasn’t looked down on, because it seems to be so common.
I love these rules
Beautifully presented! Your parents must be very proud of you.
I was wrong. No wonder a friend would sometimes glare at me whenever we're eating out. LMAO.
This was so cute and informative! For a second I thought you were gonna do SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS with what not to do with the tea 😂
Hahaha hot teas would hurt so bad!
这是一个非常漂亮的视频。感谢您帮助我们了解中国文化和传统。
I recently transferred to a school where many of the students are from China! I was really interested in learning about the culture so this really helped!
Just be careful with the huge difference between the communist party culture and the traditional Chinese culture.
@@KaiDiization I will thank you very much for your advice!
Your format and presentation are simple, informative, and professional.
I'm trying to learn Mandarin.
I have been too focused on the language.
I need to improve my display and understanding of Chinese culture, customs, and courtesies.
Thank you so much for the great video. I just subscribed. This makes me want more videos of your great tips. We especially need more videos about respecting older siblings and respecting parents to share them with the young people in our family and let them learn some traditions. Thank you!
Shown to our kids, wonderful production and explanation!
Im Indonesian Moslem, i love this Chanel, i can learn more about Chinese culture and history..
Thank u..
One of the most challenging things about learning manners when I was growing was no crunching noises when chewing. Almost impossible.
Very nice traditions! Very similar to ours in North Caucasus. I think this demeanor is to be universal for all mankind.
I’ve learned a lot of this rules from my grandmother. Even close the door quietly. But in modern times people stamp you as shy if you behave like that.
Informative, educational and motivating...
These things are still followed by my family and relatives ( with some alterations) except the tea one I guess
I love your videos! They’re so informative and I find so many resemblances with etiquette growing up in my family
I am an American. My wife is Chinese. When we visit her family, I follow these practices. They are greatly pleased. I am the oldest and respected.
Asian-American here! I am taught by my
white appa about a lot of these customs. I find it so hard to believe, when people lack these basic respects!
So interesting and useful video!!
It's important to teach kids that all people are the same, and all people should be appreciated for the good they bring to others.
This is a really helpful video! Thank you :) Maybe there are some special etiquette tips for foreigners too? Next year I plan to go visit my best friend and her family in China and I am worried, because I want to make a good impression on her parents!
I don't think Chinese people will be judging foreigners with the same standard. That being said, do take off your shoes when entering their homes 😄
just follow the ones in the videos, you should be fine, or here some tips I had known.
Wanted to share some basic chinese manners used in my family.
DAILY:
Severe: Slouching, if youre in other people's home, slouching is not a good idea. 太放肆, if youre in your home, that could be minor-medium? But it doesnt look good when other people is around.
Severe: Fidgeting the leg, looks very uneducated. Like a beggar. If you really want to fidget, only do it without anyone else is around.
Severe: Greeting or parting other family members, its a must. To show that you respect them.
Severe: Letting elderly know that you had gone out or come back home.
Severe: Never enter a person's private room, without permission. Its not your home.
TABLE MANNERS:
Severe: Invite and wait for elderly to eat first only you start. Especially grandparents or elder relatives. A bonus, if you know that the food is nice or elder's favourite, pick the food for them and place it in their plate, (best) with your untouched chopsticks or other utensils.
Medium-Severe: Sticking chopsticks or eating utensils upright in the bowl. Like praying to the God. Some people are okay with it, but mostly arent.
Severe: Playing with food or utensils, Its a no no, very bad table manners. (Even kids are not allowed to fool around the dinner table, not to mention adults). If adults do this, its perceived as child-like behavior.
Severe: Picking specific food from the dish. Its a no no again, if you really want to pick a specific food, do it in a way that is not obvious, like scooping up a part of the dish where the specific food you want is located. Never pickup the food and put it back (like choosing a vegetable in a wet market). Nobody wants to eat your saliva-touched food.
Severe: Chewing loudly, or chewing with your mouth open, slurping loudly. Its basically disgustingly uneducated, and perceived like an animal.
Severe: Sucking your teeth...(why...do it in the toilet or something, theres a mirror for you too)
Medium: Clanking and clinking of plates or eating utensils, i know its hard, but try to avoid it. So, eat slowly.
Severe: Never gather/take too much food served on the table into your plate, only take a good small portion of food to your plate, when you had finished only get some more.
@@Ancestorsss The English and French etiquette say the same things !! Excepting that if you wear a mini-skirt, you have to cross you legs when sitting in a certain way that people do not see your underwear. Also, in a staircase, men always pass before women. When entering a room, a gentleman always let a lady come in first.
@@Ancestorsss Omg, I know I'm a million years late, but thank you very much! The trip didn't work out for obvious reasons :( But I still have hope!
@@FiveThousandYears Hihi, I'm Russian and we don't allow shoes inside either :) In fact, your grandma would likely tear your legs away if you even think of entering the house with your outside shoes on.
Being respectful, knowing the values of thing and being generous.
It's weird because a lot of these are used in my culture (apart from serving tea a certain way and waiting for elders to eat first, I think...), but most don't come naturally to me at all. It's not really a big deal at home and I hardly ever think about it (I might think about ethics but not really etiquette), but now I wonder if many people do when in public or if it's just with them subconsciously. If it's a subconscious thing, that explains my awkwardness, home or abroad. :/