I was just focusing so hard on this because I just started community college. I see my friends post about having fun, going out at night, enjoying their lives together at college everyday, where they no longer text me anymore, and even my closest friends stopped too. I feel so alone, and the environment of community college where people just go to class and go home doesn't help whatsoever no matter how hard I try to become close. I've always been extremely social, but this sudden hit of no longer having anyone to lean on and it being a cycle of going to school then coming home every single day has me feeling no hope. Seeing this video just pop up feels like destiny :,)
I'm so sorry for what you have been through. Hopefully you get some support and find friends to lean on and hope you have a nice day and have the strength for the next ❤️❤️❤️
I had the same problem, I worked hard to get into university and was even at the top of my class, but I had to go to cc. I also wish I had friends. But you aren't alone, we are together in this :)
Damn. I was lucky enough to still have friends (living in same neighborhood) to hang out when I went to community college (and my friends also went to different community colleges). It is lonely now but you might find a nice friend in the future. You just haven't met them yet. Keep focusing on yourself and your studies. Try to see if there are any clubs in your community college. Just remember: You have your own life. It may not be glamorous right now but things might change in the future. I only made like one meaningful friend in community college. I made a few more good friends when I transfered to uni.
I feel like I’ve still never found my soulmate friend, watching shows with large friend groups makes me depressed. I’m 25 and everyone has left me and the ones I have come and go. So please don’t feel alone, there’s so many of us ❤️
Me too.....watching people hangout with so many friends make me feel so terrible.......i have NO friends at all....idek how or when i lost them all but i did....and it's probably totally my fault.....
Please don't feel that way, for what it is worth let me that I had a group of friend for the last 5 6 years, I put in so much effort in our friendships, but in the end, they started forming sub groups within it, and as time went one that made me feel more and more isolated and marginalised, even though I for sure was the one that gave more in our friendships than the 4 of them combined. These past couple of years i started to realise that I didn't want to stay friends with them anymore, I gave them enough excuses, but a few months ago, I decided that enough was enough, I respect myself enough to walk away from what doesn't serve me in any way, shape or form, and to be honest, I felt better alone than I did in their company! I have a few friends that i reconnected with, even though one lives abroad, one in another city, and one in my city but a bit far away,, yet just knowing that they love and value me for what I am, without me even feeling the need to do whatsoever is just amazing, we cannot see each other often and that is okay. Also I have learned that for me, I prefer to connect one on one with people, I crave depth in connection, and more often than not, that aspect is lost when there are many people talking at the same time, some even talking over others and not respecting each other in that way, which just irritates me as I have always listened to what everyone has to say, but when It is my turn to speak, they barely listen. That is to say, do not feel pressured to be a part of a large group, that is overrated, and bring in more stress than anything else. It is okay if you want to have a group to hang out with, but if you too, are like me and looking for a soulmate friend, one on one friendships is the way to go. And ultimately remember that no matter what, people can come and go no matter how close you are, I had a friend i used to consider my soulmate (platonically) yet she is one of the people in the group that ended up disappointing me the most, so what i learned from all these years, is that you should be your own best friend first, look out for yourself and learn to appreciate your own company, the rest will follow later on!
You're only 25! You've got 75 years left to meet your people 💖 you'll find them don't worry! Just live your life and have fun meeting them along the way!
your still young :) what are your hobbies? try joining clubs, reaching out to old friends,, going to the gym, yoga classes and invite them for a coffee and build a friendship you never know what you can have a year from now !
I'm also 25 and no friends. I had 2 friends and our friendship just faded away after they found their life partners. To me It's not easy to make new friends because I'm an introvert.
“I didn’t think I was worthy of being loved” this was like a punch in my face cause it’s exactly what I have been feeling and just don’t know how to scape from being like this
Just be your best possible self and the right people who value you as who you are will come. Your happiness should not depend on other people and what they think of you.
Please understand that people will come to you from time to time. You shouldn’t destroy yourself and rely other people to make you happy. Your happiness comes from yourself. Don’t let others put yourself down.
This hit so close to home that it even made me tear up. I'm currently in my 3rd year at uni and it's nothing like what I expected(obviously). I'm introverted and a bit shy but I told myself I'd put myself out there when I got to uni but it feels like life isn't allowing me to make those genuine friendships. I see people all around me having those close friend groups and posts of my high school friends seeming to have made these new amazing friendships. But for me every friendship I make seems to just end. I had managed have two close friends on my 1st year but this year I realised I wasn't even part of their friend groups, I was just that girl they hungout with sometimes. It feels so lonely at times. I can go an entire week without speaking to anyone. I get to the point where I'll stare at my phone hoping someone will remember I exist and try to reach out to me. I've tried so many times to work on friendships but it always feels like I'm a second thought to people. I would have anxiety attacks and not have a single person pop in my mind I could call to help calm me down. I don't know how many times I've cried myself to sleep thinking why I'm so worthless I can't even make one genuine friend. Is it sad that I think the only genuine friend I have is my mom? Anyway thank you for this video. It is said your 20s are filled with growing pains.
I totally feel you. I had one semester of Uni before covid hit and everything went online, now I have almost finished my bachelors. I’m having a job and I would really like to connect with my coworker because we seem to get along very well, but she seems to never have time outside of work. I genuinely don’t know how to make friends outside of school, where you seemed to just automatically become friends with someone because you saw them everyday. I’m working in a large city, there should be many people I would get along well, but how do I meet and connect with them? Anyways, it’s sweet that you are such good friends with your mom. I feel like my boyfriend is my best friend, we love each other a lot, but there still is a desire for friendship that he can’t fulfill for me. Sorry, I’ve been talking about myself because I relate to your comment. I truly hope that you will find someone who appreciates you because you deserve that. I’m just a stranger on the internet but I care ❤
Thank you soo much for this comment. I couldn't relate more, I hope you find true contentment in your own beauty and individuality and know that you are enough. Sometimes trusting in God's plan for you is worth the wait
oh wow! i have been going through the exact same thing. I what you're understand in the deepest way, the amount of times ive felt like screaming and thought that no one would notice even if i did, it makes the rest of life so difficult to get through. I will be be your comment friend (at least its something) ik small things like that can mean allot- were in this lonliness together and i reminding myself everyday that i just havent found the right people and if i never find them i will have grown to love myself more and will be okay either way. sending you love.
I can go atleast 10 days without talking because of my elementary , Middle and high school experience..... I'm really sorry to hear that.... Ik how it feels don't feel hopeless, you have your whole life, I genuinely wish you get some of the most amazing friends... Rn at least you have your mother, I didn't even have my parents to listen.... But still going so please don't lose your hope..... And once you start enjoying your company, believe me everything will make sense..... And tbh I wouldn't change what happened to me cuz because of that I'm a really strong and kind hearted, because I don't want to let people go through what I went through.... So please stay strong.... And don't lose hope..... 🙇♀️
I’m actually so glad you uploaded this, I’ve struggled with loneliness my entire life and I recently lost the only 2 friends I had. The loneliness is really getting to me and I often feel like a failure because of it. So this video is really great for me (as weird as that sounds) ❤ Edit: Also I do online school so it’s really difficult to meet people :(
i've not had any friends since 2020 and i think being autistic and isolated for two years during covid has changed the way i interact with people. I can't wait for the day I make a friend again
I'm 27, self diagnosed and have selective mutism. I also have no friends 😔 My social anxiety is getting worse.. I'm not good at communicating with others. It feels like no one understands me
I think it's the combo of misconceptions as to what friendships supposed to look like (we're bombarded by sitcoms with main characters in their 30s but spend their lives 24/7 with their friends) and social media boosting this fomo culture. To me friendship is even more complicated than romantic relationships. There's no breaking up or anything, if you drift apart it just happens. Add that to constantly seeing friendship posts online and how people are hanging out and having the best times of their lives. It really screws your mind
This has been one of the most relatable episodes yet.. this is what I’ve learned just recently friendships like any other relationship take time and effort from both sides, understanding each other, having fun with each other, etc. if they aren’t caring about you but you are about them, it’s not worth it! Or if they aren’t bad talk to them about it and it they don’t understand your wishes then they really aren’t worth it to be friends with them. Communication is key
The thing is, most people always view friendships are lesser than romantic relationships, when in reality it is just as important! This is one of the reasons I had to let go of some friends. They never put in effort while giving their all to whoever they are dating at that time, which imo is not only illogical but also very disrespectful!
Honestly the thought that they're billions of people in the world yet so many people feel lonely and unable to connect with others is really so bizarre to me
This made me remember my old days when I used to be really goofy and outgoing. I had a pretty big friend circle that time but now that I am quite introverted, quiet and shy, I rarely have any friends. However, being the top student of the class some people still are "friends" with me. Currently, I have only two friends with whom I am not super close as I don't open up a lot to people but they still matter a lot to me. Crazy how everything changes without us even realising it, until we look back.
Depression and anxiety made me completely isolate myself from everyone when I was 15, I stopped going to school and naturally over time I lost contact to most of my friends. And as a result of that I fell into even deeper depression and it stayed like that for 5 years until pretty much this year. Not having anyone to talk to my age for such a long time has made me forget who I am as a friend, if that makes sense. I'm currently learning how to be myself around people my age again. It was never like I pretended to be someone else or anything like that, I just didn't know what kind of person I was anymore aside from the me that sits in her room and watches youtube and tv shows. I didn't know what to talk about, what to do, how to behave, how to have fun. I still don't have that emotional deep connection that I so long for with anyone right now. But I at least have found a friend that I'm meeting very frequently and I think with effort, it has the potential to develop into something beautiful. I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one going through this, cause it surely does feel like it sometimes.
hey, do if you got nobody to talk.. I will offer you to be my friend. if you respond to this I'll give you my snapchat if you have that! ;) my myself is friendless.. I have like 1 online friend, and the rest are family.. so it hurst
I have almost the same exact experience as you. I distanced myself from all of my friends because of anxiety depression caused by a disorder i still face today. I was around 13 when I started losing all of my friends and the ones i still had/made were unhealthy ones, started from my insecurities. I wasn’t aware of what I was doing to myself at the time. All I was focusing on was self preservation and surviving. After all these years I still mourn those friends and relationships i’ve lost due to my mental state. How I miss those friends and having friends. I’m also experiencing what you are. Forgetting how to be a friend and act after locking yourself up in your room for years. I’m slowly learning day by day and hope that one day i’ll be at the place I want to be!
This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my UA-cam channel 10 months ago about self development. Now I have 1,934 subs and > 2k hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I could haven’t learned without getting started in the 1st place.
Girl I ain’t got no genuine friends either! When I get friends over time I realize we just don’t click like I want us to. But i believe one day we all will find the right person or people 🤍 your alone season is about YOU. In my case I have had people traumatize me & stab me in the back so I think taking time to yourself to heal & become happier will bring the right people
I appreciate so much how open, honest, and vulnerable you are in this series. You're raising ideas and questions I had never thought of, and encouraging some of my owl self-reflection and growth
Zoe, I can't believe that someone as wholesome as you has had this experience too. Thanks for talking abt it. I previously thought maybe there's something wrong with me for feeling so lonely at times. 😅
I actually needed this video so much!I have friends i should be grateful for but none of them feel real, I don‘t feel safe, I feel jugded…I just want to have friends that feel real not just temporary!I want them to actually like me for being myself.I dont want to always listen to what they experienced or what plans they have I also want them to listen to my stuff…I dont want them to be jealous but feel proud and happy for me.But also when I find someone like that Im always the person who has to keep the frienship going.I dont feel like they actually want to be friends with me…
23 and have no friends. Between covid, going to school at a community college, deeply valuing my individuality and alone time, and working jobs where my coworkers are almost exclusively middle aged to elderly ladies, I have nobody in my life my own age. I’ve made friends in the past and I know I’ll make them again, it’s just kinda embarrassing to not have any friends right now and I don’t even know where to start looking for new ones in my 20s
Wow I didn’t know so many ppl could relate to this! I totally feel you btw! Everything that Zoe has sheared on this channel is unbelievablely close to my one life!
I already relate to this so much even though I haven't even watched the video yet. I'm almost in high school, and I'm surrounded by many friends. I get scared when I think of the future. The older you are, the harder it is to keep friendships I heard. Knowing that in the future, I may be lonely sometimes makes me sad. However, I'm glad to know that I have meaningful friends with me. I really hope we stay in touch throughout high school and beyond. I'm going to try to make as many good friends as I can, ones that will be there for me when I'm at my loneliest.
You won't hangout as much as you do during highschool. But true friendship can withstand time. It's surprising how some groups can pick up where they left off, so i think that's what makes me think of a strong friendship
I suppose I'm not in a bad position, since I have a circle of uni friends and one of old high school friends that I cherish a lot. It's just that the old friends seem closer to their new ones, and my new ones seem to be closer with their old ones, and I feel stuck in this weird adaptation cycle in which I can't fully figure out my place. At the end of the day I'm surrounded by great people that I can talk to transparently about everything, so I shouldn't complain. It's just that it would be nice to have the soulmate friend that everyone seems to have found already I guess
I never leave comments but I have to. I want to thank you for this video…I opened it to just watch another girl cry to I guess live through her sadness to forget about mine, but I got the opposite..I got help I needed..as I’ve been struggling with the same exact thing…you helped me immediately appreciate new friendships I made recently and I learned that it’s ok to let go when you dont click with the people you wanted to click so badly. It just means they are not for me, and maybe it’s not because I’m not able to give them enough attention but maybe it’s because they are not able to give me the energy I need from them. And it’s a very important lesson to learn.
I just lost my friendgroup… it is good cause they were hella toxic, still i am completely alone in my city, school and in my head. I do have a best friend, but she is still friends with the group and everything is weird for weeks. I don‘t know how to deal with all of this and want to start over but didn‘t know how. Your video helped. I thank you a thousand times. I believe with you sharing this i (and a lot of other people) can get over this feeling of complete loneliness. Thank you ❤
This video hits so hard. I was really struggling with loneliness but didn't rlly know how to fix it and I also felt ashamed that I was struggling with this when there were so many other people who have more severe problems in their life. I am currently in my "experiment" stage where I am figuring out ways to feel less lonely by catching up with old friends and initiating the hang outs with old and new friends. Thanks so much for this video Zoe
I needed to hear this. I'm a freshman in college and I have this long-distance bestfriend ever since elementary. I was always a one-call away friend to her, but now after watching the third part of the video I realized that I was holding on to her as I'm scared that without her, I will not have anyone else. I would always be left on seen and sometimes my messages won't be even opened but I see her actively posting on other social media platforms. Now instead of worrying what I might've done to upset her or what I can do to further connect with her, I just focus that energy into bettering myself. I also felt like I had no one to lean on to but I realize I often see the pattern of having friends through movies and books that are all fictional.
omg I know exactly how you feel. I also have a long-distance best friend that I’ve had since elementary school, and I’ve always relied on our friendship too. like, “I may be lonely but at least I have her.” but I know she doesn’t need me as much as I need her (she has lots of other irl and online friends). hopefully that’ll change soon. I wish you all the best in your life, especially your future friendships!
This was a great video! I'm 25 now and I feel like I just made my first friend ever just two weeks ago. I always felt alone and lonely even when ppl were around like you said to the point I just wanted someone to love me so I would take any type of friendship or form of relationship but it wasn't until 2020 that I had to sit down and realize, I don't have friends. I never felt I matter to anybody that much and after my bestfriend ghosted me in last year 3 days before my birthday, I felt even more alone. 10 years gone but it felt like a relief because part of me felt she didn't want to be my friend anyways. So I had to really think about what is a friend? How to be it? etc and I realize I have no clue how to be one for myself so I am still doing that myself. I finally put myself back out there last month and met this wonderful human who I feel like we been friends forever but its only been 3 weeks. I hope to run into a few more ppl like that but until then, I am still going to learn how to be my own friend.....truly this time.
Since I’ve been alone most my life, I’m comfy with myself I’m trying to not turn people away because of my fears! I know good friends are out there, it gives me hope
This video is obviously relatable, I'm in high school and people get uninterested to me. I was left alone in one room, with four corners and everybody is having fun. While I'm here, left alone. I also saw my other friends having fun and going outside. I felt trap, jealous and alone.
It is okay to not have friends bc I have seen this world some friends are like colors bc they always changes their color you have to be strong and you have to find the strongest one you are cause no one in this world will come to save you It will always be you so be strong
I recently just moved to the U.S and I am about to get into college full-time (in January), and watching this....I haven't been able to admit to anyone how lonely and confused and disoriented I feel. I feel out of order and no matter how I try to convince myself that I am enough, I still can't see past the act that I am an outsider, a thorn in the side. Seeing you talk about this however, and sitting through it is my first step towards admitting it, which I would like to believe is a step towards healing. Thank you Zoe. You're amazing❤
This made me really miss having friends 😭 I don’t know how to meet people. I tried Bumble-friends and no one else wanted to keep up a conversation. I don’t see many people my age… I want to go back home where all my friends are
I swear losing friends is like going through the 7 stages of grief. It's absolutely painful, especially if you were somewhat the cause of the falling out. Anyways, great video! I really did enjoy it
This is so beautiful and sad in a good. Positive way I am experiencing loneliness and how to love myself by having no friend sometimes feel worthless or less attractive to have friends but I trust time .your story is so similar to mine but different
I'm going through what you're talking about now, it's been almost a year since this loneliness phase has started, I worked on myself a lot but I definitely sometimes feel like I would love to have a close friend that shares interests with me and we can hangout together, although it can get really hard for me in some days but I know that the best thing to do is just focusing on learning and discovering and that friend will come. thank you for putting such a content out there, I enjoy watching your videos.
thank you so much for this video. for the transparency. you two have a beautiful relationship and seeing how you light up around each other makes me warm inside. i hope to find that kind of platonic love soon!!🥺❤🩹
Thank you for sharing this Zoe I've been struggling with loneliness ever since I graduated highschool 5 years ago. I'm a transfer student currently in my junior year at university and it's so hard to make friends here. Everyone has their own friend group and I just haven't found anyone compatible with me. The loneliness hurts so much 😢
you know what I know that I deserve better, and that's why I let go of my old friends cause they were taking my energy. I love myself more than anyone that I can't stay with someone who does not respect me. but still thought with no friends, I couldn't deny that I had this one friend but having a female friend hit differently, it just feels warm and more like home.
I recently lost both of my only two best friends. I believe the friendship ended because I started my own business. It was difficult for me at first to let go and heal but now I realized they are not mature and weren’t really my friends to begin with.
This video was edited sooo well so beautifully!!!! Also this whole message and journey is understandable for me personally as there are all kinds of people going through different journeys and we do get to come across similar ones from across the world thanks to the internet. Thank you so much for being raw and genuine and for sharing this topic and for your awesome creativity with it.
I've no real life friends since high school,now I've completed my school two years ago , I feel so bad when I see other girls laughing , eating and going together and I'm returning home alone 💔 it breaks my heart and daily makes me feel so so so low 💔 I've never found the ones I deserve.
Thank you for uploading this!! I was currently scrolling videos here at UA-cam sadly after seeing my friends from my old school hanging out including my bff.. i saw it at her instagram story...I was really sad because i feel left out..I constantly keep on reminding myself that it's okay but the fact that my bff 'left out' me, she hanged out with other people by going to the mall, shopping (we never got to do that) still makes me sad and lonely... her friends are pretty which also made me feel insecure.. my parents are there to give me emotional support so I'm thankful for them... now that I have onsite classes at my new school, it saddens me more to see my new classmates laughing and hanging out, being close to each other...it made me jealous... but this video will surely help me to heal me... so, again, thank you very much
Im 19 years old and i feel like something is missing in my life. It seems that everybody have fun, meet new people, go to the parties and there is me, completely lost and lonely. I've lost my only one friend last autumn and now i feel extremely alone and my social anxiety is getting worse. Thank you so much for your video, i hope that things will get better as well and i'll find my soulmate
I have been in college for four years and been "friends" with different groups but it makes me really sad that those i called friends have never taken a single photo of me or never said lets go get a coffee, now it's hitting hard and I felt lonely
Girl, I don’t know how I found this only now. I totally get it. It usually comes from childhood trauma that makes us punish ourselves and our inner child.
This is such a beautiful video. A year ago, I went through a terrible friendship breakup. Still to do this day it makes me said. I am in therapy now, so I am trying to heal and get better. We didn’t breakup because of this, but she never put time and effort into our friendship. It was simply one-sided, and my therapist helped me see that!! This video brings me a great amount of comfort. You have no idea!!
This really hit. The loneliness really drive me insane someday. I was an introvert but I'm more of an ambivert now as I'm trying soo hard to make more friends and form better connection with ppl but it never go my way. I really envy those ppl that have someone to be there for them, who they can talk to, who they can call whenever they want or whenever something comes up, who they can hangout with, who they can share without feeling judged and so on. I really envy them. It's not like I don't have any friends, I'd be lying if I say so. But the thing is I have no one to turn to when I have any issues. Everyone is busy, no one understand, I try to text or call someone, even my "close friend" and all I got was "i'm busy now, let me call u later" and never hear again. All of the friends I have are the ppl I talk to when we meet or in class. After class, there's not even a single word. I have no one to turn to, I have no one to share my feelings with and damn, that feel like sht. srsly, I even quit socials cuz I can't stand seeing everyone hanging out, having fun, sharing the text sc with their friends, my friends hanging out without me or with their other friends and I'm just sitting in my room doing nth. Yeah, I'm jealous and I feel shit for feeling jealous. Ughhh. btw, if u reach here 'cuz u can relate, please cheer up, it'll past and eventho ppl aren't there for me, I try to be there for everyone so you can reach me through the contact i leave on my video. Cheer Up y'all. and sorry for the negativity as well.
hi,i don't usually leave comments, but i felt like i had to. so thank you i recently started my healing journey. thank you for inspiring me and making me change my mindset. i was feeling lonely, but watching this video made me realise that i should learn to be friend with myself first. thank you Zoe. and to anyone reading this, take care of you and let's heal together! lvy
Im in a new high school now (I’m a sophomore) and it’s been really hard for me I can relate to you so much that I’m getting emotional. When I was in middle school I had a really good situation where I always felt like I could start a conversation or call someone whenever and just text people randomly. Now I feel very alone. I went from calling my best friend to calling my mom whenever something happens. It’s a boarding school too so I’m constantly around these people who I just don’t know how to get close to. I’m so socially conscious and beat myself up when I’m not contributing to the conversation. I’m usually very extroverted so this has been very rough for me. I’m just glad to know that people in this same situation got past this. I’m actually very touched that you shared this thank you so much.
I seek hope anywhere i can find it.However momentary things giving me hope seem to be in vain.I know how it feels when u feel empty,bored and alone all day.Emotionally opening up to people,who were a mistake to trust nd then being called desperate..Being nice and supportive to everyone but the moment u expect the same from them,only to be disappointed..Making friends in the few limited opportunities u get,only for those to end up hurting you..At this point it feels like even an alien would make a better friend,or family....
i relate so much to this video. i finally had a few friends only towards the end of high school, and then the pandemic hit which prevented me from meeting and spending time with them in person - a few of them also were dealing with their mental health and so we drifted away while they took time for that and couldn't work on their friendships. when i went to college during the pandemic, i didn't like partying or drinking or any of those things so i struggled to meet people i liked and took really until the end of my first year to find even 1 or 2 people i could hang out with and talk to. recently though, all my friendships have been feeling so surface level. my old friends from home are either dealing with issues or living amazing lives with their new friends where they're so busy we hardly talk anymore. the friends around me feel surface level, as if we just hang out when i ask them to and people keep ignoring me or not responding. it gets so tiring to be lonely for so long in your life and you wonder if you just don't deserve close friendship at all. thank you so much for making this video, i feel a little less alone now for just wanting a close friend/friends. :(
i am still trying to get there because i struggle with vulnerability and communication but as i grow older i realize how human connections are so important. i never trusted my "friends" when i had them because i didn't like any of them at all. i was always the mom or caring friend so i ended up simply being a caring figure for them, i slowly walked into a depression and isolated myself completely through highschool. i started to think i didn't need no one because everyone ignored me when i needed help and no one ever cared about me, those were my friends so i started to think friendship could not exist. now i am in my second first year of college after a lot of hardships and still struggling so much but you realize you have no one to tell something to. i nearly lost myself a few months ago and i changed a lot of things and i achieved things and everything but i can't share it with no one because i have no one. that's the worst. no one cares about you at all. it is so important to try and try and keep trying
Zoe’s newest videos are everything, I love being able to see and understand everything she’s been through, it honestly feels like therapy!!! Besides, the topics discussed by her are all things that I’ve personally experienced so I just connect in a magical way with this videos 💗💗💗 xx zoe!
I have friends who always take and never give. Same with my family. And recently my girlfriend broke up with me and I feel i will never be enough for anyone, only when someone needs something. I'm at a moment where I try to find a way to be happy without anyone, but it's really hard
Finding friends or a friend takes time even if it feels like it takes forever. That doesn’t make you less valuable of a person, unless, you get to learn how to value your own self, to whom you will always be with for the rest of your life
Omg Alivia and you both are friends❤❤❤🥂 I actually have no friends. I mean friends who belong to our soul. Anyway its okay atleast i have my husband for now and for the rest of my life if he can handle me that long 🥂
My best friend commited suicide. I miss her so much. I don’t want to replace her in any way but I’m having trouble finding friends. No one can understand me like her and I can’t trust anyone enough. All my darkest secrets died with her. She was the only person besides my bf to know everything about me. We had a special bond where we could argue and go back to normal, where she could offend and me not getting butthurt back, the only person in school I didn’t feel uncomfortable with. I hate that I didn’t pick her up that night. She deserved the world.
My closest friends are literally states apart from me and I only will get to see 2 of them in a few months for only a day. I don't rarely feel the distance but it's there and I'll say it especially affects me when I see others being able to just crash at each other's places and just hang out whenever. I wish I had that "pintrest board life" but then again I'm pretty young and my dad tells me this all the time "patience is key, you'll get it when you least expect it"
I love you so much for this. ❤️ Thank you thank you thank you for existing ❤️ your videos give me life ❤️ PS: I literally always get the feeling that I have no friends and have struggled with this for a long time I RELATE TO THE CALLING SOMEONE TO SHARE THE MOST TRIVIAL THINGS AND ASKING FOR HELP WITHOUT FEELING LIKE YOU OWE THEM
My best friend ditched me yesterday and now I'm all alone 🙂 i have no one to hang out with I'm also single so I basically have no one to talk with 🙂 idk what to do and how to normalise it.
My best friend not only ditched me she even spread rumours about me and all my other frnds left and even she convinced my bf to brkup with me and now i have no frnds and I’m all alone depressed as hell
Every year my high school friends and I have a Christmas chat over Skype or FaceTime. We all live in different time zones. We only talk once a year. I look forward to it every year and I thought they did too. This year, like all of the past years I set an alarm and a reminder in my calendar for the online chat. No one showed up. No one even texted. Sitting there alone with my party hat on I felt truly truly alone. These were kids I knew for 10+ years. These were kids I trick or treated with. I’m shattered. I feel like they moved on and I was left alone.
I texted each of them individually wishing them a merry Christmas hoping I’d get an explanation but no, none of them responded. They all left me on read. There was no dramatic falling out or nothing, just one day, I meant nothing to any of them. I couldn’t make any close new friends after high school, so losing them meant I lost all of my friends.
I’m in this pit right now, and I feel worthless and I’ve gained weight in uni and my grades are awful so my sense of confidence has plummeted as well. But I think this video helped, or, I think it put my mind set in the right direction. Helps knowing others feel this way too.
This video is so beautiful to me because sisterhood and community it general is so important to me and I honestly believe everyone should has and should have their person/people. Genuinely happy you found your person ❤
We need to stop romanticizing college, most people in my class were miserable, I was miserable, and now that I'm done with it, I can't even get a job! So we need to stop this bs
I always answer Instagram stories in diferent ways or send memes to people because it is a simple way to start or maintain a friendship. It's possible to make friends anywhere (one of my friends I met because our bus broke and we have to wait for the next one) the biggest point is: be open and look around to start conversations (like " I love your bag"). I really hope that the people who struggle without friendship find your friends mate. (English isn't my first language, please don't judge my poor grammar skills 😂)
I feel the same with ‘having no friends’. Going through high school I’ve had the same friends since going through different grades and we do school activities and events together, buy each other food but when we graduated from high school and months later I would message people and check in on them (something I NEVER go in return) not even like a random ‘Hi!’ After a few months. Also no one else would make outside plans to meet up and go out have a nice day together. And recently I had found a collectors item that I knew a friend would like because I remembered she’d liked that specific thing for years and bought it for her for Christmas but I never get and I have never gotten that type of long lasting, deep, nurturing & mutual friendship. I am definitely finding myself wanting certain people in my life now as friends and building my path to loving myself and appreciating myself. Even when I started and finished college, I felt horrible. I couldn’t make friends even when I at least attempted but everyone either had an ego, was just taking advantage of me, or I didn’t feel an authentic connection to & I was so physically and emotionally drained I didn’t want to be bothered and on top of that I disliked myself so much.
My understanding of friendships has changed a lot in recent years. I am now with literally 0 friendships. There is no one to talk to even superficially, but I accepted it. I became a friend of myself, occupying my time with self-development and sometimes playing online to reduce my loneliness. But I have hope that in the future I might get friends and why not my soul mate
I clicked on this because I thought I was the only one who seem to be lonely. As a U.S. military member sent to Japan, I’m completely alone. I don’t relate to my fellow teammates who are wild and into partying, and it’s very difficult for me to make friends with any Japanese people or even go on a date since I’m a foreigner. So I’m completely alone.
Icl we need to stop looking into social media to show us what true friendship is. Social media, film etc are just short depictions of moments. We should define friendship on our own terms.
you look great btw!! I feel like I thought I was really lonely but I was forgetting about the friends I already have. I just had to be the one to put effort. Thank you for your insight:)
I wish I had friends who would invest in me, because I do to my friends. I do beyond what I could bear, just so I could be loved. I guess I am pulling back, and maybe chill alone for awhile.. maybe distract myself with getting a new job. I get tired of being just alone, but I have no control in making people loving me.
I’ve not had what you would consider a best friend since sixth grade (1993). You can survive but it’s a seriously lonely existence. Feelings of worthlessness get so intense that it impacts patience to learn skills and new habits that would build confidence. Eventually you just have to hear new external sources that argue with your inner perception. For me it was martial arts and extreme music.
Wow, to me it's so crazy how close of friends you guys actually are. To imagine that I found both of you separately like almost 2 years ago- and now come to find out y'all are actually friends! Blows my mind!!! How did you guys become friends??
Hey Zoe, I really liked this video because I like on how you are trying to be a human being when the world gets tough or hard or when you don't have friends. I have autism with a learning disability and I have always struggled with friendships due to people, some friends, and peers of them and other adults that know me get judgmental about me being different or how they believe that having a disability is bad. It's painful to deal the the harshness, however the only thing that I can do is be a human being who is trying my best, be compassionate for people who have struggles in life, volunteer to help the homeless, and think of good thoughts for people when they have struggles or who I care about. I want to let you know that you are very inspirational to me when i deal with hard days and that I'm always thinking of good thoughts for you to do well.
i actually never have any close friends, if i did i don't know how to maintain the relationship. In 2020 i made some online friends which i wish they were my friends in real life as i rarely met people of same interest, but later on we all lost touch with each other. this is my college time but as i can't afford it due to financial issues, I'm totally alone. I'm in depression for a year now and having none to talk with is worst sometime. i don't know to whom rent my feels. everyday i tell myself I'm here for myself and everything will be fine soon. I think i need to be my own friend first. This video is really helpful! thank you so much zoe and i really hope i would meet some people whom i could call my close friends and enjoy those moments which i never able to enjoy in the past. ( sorry for my bad English. I'm still working on it.)
I was just focusing so hard on this because I just started community college. I see my friends post about having fun, going out at night, enjoying their lives together at college everyday, where they no longer text me anymore, and even my closest friends stopped too. I feel so alone, and the environment of community college where people just go to class and go home doesn't help whatsoever no matter how hard I try to become close. I've always been extremely social, but this sudden hit of no longer having anyone to lean on and it being a cycle of going to school then coming home every single day has me feeling no hope. Seeing this video just pop up feels like destiny :,)
Same!! I can go further than small talk
I'm so sorry for what you have been through. Hopefully you get some support and find friends to lean on and hope you have a nice day and have the strength for the next ❤️❤️❤️
I had the same problem, I worked hard to get into university and was even at the top of my class, but I had to go to cc.
I also wish I had friends. But you aren't alone, we are together in this :)
Damn. I was lucky enough to still have friends (living in same neighborhood) to hang out when I went to community college (and my friends also went to different community colleges). It is lonely now but you might find a nice friend in the future. You just haven't met them yet. Keep focusing on yourself and your studies. Try to see if there are any clubs in your community college. Just remember: You have your own life. It may not be glamorous right now but things might change in the future. I only made like one meaningful friend in community college. I made a few more good friends when I transfered to uni.
hits home for me :
I feel like I’ve still never found my soulmate friend, watching shows with large friend groups makes me depressed. I’m 25 and everyone has left me and the ones I have come and go. So please don’t feel alone, there’s so many of us ❤️
Me too.....watching people hangout with so many friends make me feel so terrible.......i have NO friends at all....idek how or when i lost them all but i did....and it's probably totally my fault.....
Please don't feel that way, for what it is worth let me that I had a group of friend for the last 5 6 years, I put in so much effort in our friendships, but in the end, they started forming sub groups within it, and as time went one that made me feel more and more isolated and marginalised, even though I for sure was the one that gave more in our friendships than the 4 of them combined.
These past couple of years i started to realise that I didn't want to stay friends with them anymore, I gave them enough excuses, but a few months ago, I decided that enough was enough, I respect myself enough to walk away from what doesn't serve me in any way, shape or form, and to be honest, I felt better alone than I did in their company! I have a few friends that i reconnected with, even though one lives abroad, one in another city, and one in my city but a bit far away,, yet just knowing that they love and value me for what I am, without me even feeling the need to do whatsoever is just amazing, we cannot see each other often and that is okay.
Also I have learned that for me, I prefer to connect one on one with people, I crave depth in connection, and more often than not, that aspect is lost when there are many people talking at the same time, some even talking over others and not respecting each other in that way, which just irritates me as I have always listened to what everyone has to say, but when It is my turn to speak, they barely listen.
That is to say, do not feel pressured to be a part of a large group, that is overrated, and bring in more stress than anything else. It is okay if you want to have a group to hang out with, but if you too, are like me and looking for a soulmate friend, one on one friendships is the way to go.
And ultimately remember that no matter what, people can come and go no matter how close you are, I had a friend i used to consider my soulmate (platonically) yet she is one of the people in the group that ended up disappointing me the most, so what i learned from all these years, is that you should be your own best friend first, look out for yourself and learn to appreciate your own company, the rest will follow later on!
You're only 25! You've got 75 years left to meet your people 💖 you'll find them don't worry! Just live your life and have fun meeting them along the way!
your still young :) what are your hobbies? try joining clubs, reaching out to old friends,, going to the gym, yoga classes and invite them for a coffee and build a friendship you never know what you can have a year from now !
I'm also 25 and no friends. I had 2 friends and our friendship just faded away after they found their life partners. To me It's not easy to make new friends because I'm an introvert.
“I didn’t think I was worthy of being loved” this was like a punch in my face cause it’s exactly what I have been feeling and just don’t know how to scape from being like this
Just be your best possible self and the right people who value you as who you are will come. Your happiness should not depend on other people and what they think of you.
Please understand that people will come to you from time to time. You shouldn’t destroy yourself and rely other people to make you happy. Your happiness comes from yourself. Don’t let others put yourself down.
me af
This hit so close to home that it even made me tear up. I'm currently in my 3rd year at uni and it's nothing like what I expected(obviously). I'm introverted and a bit shy but I told myself I'd put myself out there when I got to uni but it feels like life isn't allowing me to make those genuine friendships. I see people all around me having those close friend groups and posts of my high school friends seeming to have made these new amazing friendships. But for me every friendship I make seems to just end. I had managed have two close friends on my 1st year but this year I realised I wasn't even part of their friend groups, I was just that girl they hungout with sometimes. It feels so lonely at times. I can go an entire week without speaking to anyone. I get to the point where I'll stare at my phone hoping someone will remember I exist and try to reach out to me. I've tried so many times to work on friendships but it always feels like I'm a second thought to people. I would have anxiety attacks and not have a single person pop in my mind I could call to help calm me down. I don't know how many times I've cried myself to sleep thinking why I'm so worthless I can't even make one genuine friend. Is it sad that I think the only genuine friend I have is my mom? Anyway thank you for this video. It is said your 20s are filled with growing pains.
And thank God, at least you have your mom :) i really hope you can friend truthful friends in the future
I totally feel you. I had one semester of Uni before covid hit and everything went online, now I have almost finished my bachelors. I’m having a job and I would really like to connect with my coworker because we seem to get along very well, but she seems to never have time outside of work. I genuinely don’t know how to make friends outside of school, where you seemed to just automatically become friends with someone because you saw them everyday. I’m working in a large city, there should be many people I would get along well, but how do I meet and connect with them?
Anyways, it’s sweet that you are such good friends with your mom. I feel like my boyfriend is my best friend, we love each other a lot, but there still is a desire for friendship that he can’t fulfill for me.
Sorry, I’ve been talking about myself because I relate to your comment. I truly hope that you will find someone who appreciates you because you deserve that. I’m just a stranger on the internet but I care ❤
Thank you soo much for this comment. I couldn't relate more, I hope you find true contentment in your own beauty and individuality and know that you are enough. Sometimes trusting in God's plan for you is worth the wait
oh wow! i have been going through the exact same thing. I what you're understand in the deepest way, the amount of times ive felt like screaming and thought that no one would notice even if i did, it makes the rest of life so difficult to get through. I will be be your comment friend (at least its something) ik small things like that can mean allot- were in this lonliness together and i reminding myself everyday that i just havent found the right people and if i never find them i will have grown to love myself more and will be okay either way. sending you love.
I can go atleast 10 days without talking because of my elementary , Middle and high school experience..... I'm really sorry to hear that.... Ik how it feels don't feel hopeless, you have your whole life, I genuinely wish you get some of the most amazing friends... Rn at least you have your mother, I didn't even have my parents to listen.... But still going so please don't lose your hope..... And once you start enjoying your company, believe me everything will make sense..... And tbh I wouldn't change what happened to me cuz because of that I'm a really strong and kind hearted, because I don't want to let people go through what I went through.... So please stay strong.... And don't lose hope..... 🙇♀️
I’m actually so glad you uploaded this, I’ve struggled with loneliness my entire life and I recently lost the only 2 friends I had. The loneliness is really getting to me and I often feel like a failure because of it. So this video is really great for me (as weird as that sounds) ❤
Edit: Also I do online school so it’s really difficult to meet people :(
It must be hard...
Can totally relate to you!!
💕💕💕
When you get older you have less friends, and it gets harder to find / keep friends.
I am going thru literally the same you described, is hard specially if you have depression too, feel you
i've not had any friends since 2020 and i think being autistic and isolated for two years during covid has changed the way i interact with people. I can't wait for the day I make a friend again
I’ll be your friend!!
Let's be friends ☀️
I'm 27, self diagnosed and have selective mutism. I also have no friends 😔 My social anxiety is getting worse.. I'm not good at communicating with others. It feels like no one understands me
@princesstutusweet Same :/
@@zoe_dawg wtf you're making her feel worse (?)
I think it's the combo of misconceptions as to what friendships supposed to look like (we're bombarded by sitcoms with main characters in their 30s but spend their lives 24/7 with their friends) and social media boosting this fomo culture.
To me friendship is even more complicated than romantic relationships. There's no breaking up or anything, if you drift apart it just happens. Add that to constantly seeing friendship posts online and how people are hanging out and having the best times of their lives. It really screws your mind
This has been one of the most relatable episodes yet.. this is what I’ve learned just recently friendships like any other relationship take time and effort from both sides, understanding each other, having fun with each other, etc. if they aren’t caring about you but you are about them, it’s not worth it! Or if they aren’t bad talk to them about it and it they don’t understand your wishes then they really aren’t worth it to be friends with them. Communication is key
The thing is, most people always view friendships are lesser than romantic relationships, when in reality it is just as important! This is one of the reasons I had to let go of some friends. They never put in effort while giving their all to whoever they are dating at that time, which imo is not only illogical but also very disrespectful!
communication!! honestly theres so much truth in this
Honestly the thought that they're billions of people in the world yet so many people feel lonely and unable to connect with others is really so bizarre to me
This made me remember my old days when I used to be really goofy and outgoing. I had a pretty big friend circle that time but now that I am quite introverted, quiet and shy, I rarely have any friends. However, being the top student of the class some people still are "friends" with me. Currently, I have only two friends with whom I am not super close as I don't open up a lot to people but they still matter a lot to me.
Crazy how everything changes without us even realising it, until we look back.
I’m still trying to find a friend which I can feel comfortable around and feel like I deserve to be friends with them and you give me hope💕
Hey. What anime is your profile pic from? It looks nice.
@@matthewconnor6561 Its not from a anime is from a game:) Also the character name is Klee :)
Depression and anxiety made me completely isolate myself from everyone when I was 15, I stopped going to school and naturally over time I lost contact to most of my friends. And as a result of that I fell into even deeper depression and it stayed like that for 5 years until pretty much this year. Not having anyone to talk to my age for such a long time has made me forget who I am as a friend, if that makes sense. I'm currently learning how to be myself around people my age again. It was never like I pretended to be someone else or anything like that, I just didn't know what kind of person I was anymore aside from the me that sits in her room and watches youtube and tv shows. I didn't know what to talk about, what to do, how to behave, how to have fun.
I still don't have that emotional deep connection that I so long for with anyone right now. But I at least have found a friend that I'm meeting very frequently and I think with effort, it has the potential to develop into something beautiful.
I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one going through this, cause it surely does feel like it sometimes.
Hugs and support for u 💕💕
@@b.curupira4683 thank you 💖
I’m in this exact situation at the moment. Any advice?
hey, do if you got nobody to talk.. I will offer you to be my friend. if you respond to this I'll give you my snapchat if you have that! ;) my myself is friendless.. I have like 1 online friend, and the rest are family.. so it hurst
I have almost the same exact experience as you. I distanced myself from all of my friends because of anxiety depression caused by a disorder i still face today. I was around 13 when I started losing all of my friends and the ones i still had/made were unhealthy ones, started from my insecurities. I wasn’t aware of what I was doing to myself at the time. All I was focusing on was self preservation and surviving. After all these years I still mourn those friends and relationships i’ve lost due to my mental state. How I miss those friends and having friends. I’m also experiencing what you are. Forgetting how to be a friend and act after locking yourself up in your room for years. I’m slowly learning day by day and hope that one day i’ll be at the place I want to be!
This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my UA-cam channel 10 months ago about self development. Now I have 1,934 subs and > 2k hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I could haven’t learned without getting started in the 1st place.
Girl I ain’t got no genuine friends either! When I get friends over time I realize we just don’t click like I want us to. But i believe one day we all will find the right person or people 🤍 your alone season is about YOU. In my case I have had people traumatize me & stab me in the back so I think taking time to yourself to heal & become happier will bring the right people
I appreciate so much how open, honest, and vulnerable you are in this series. You're raising ideas and questions I had never thought of, and encouraging some of my owl self-reflection and growth
Zoe, I can't believe that someone as wholesome as you has had this experience too. Thanks for talking abt it. I previously thought maybe there's something wrong with me for feeling so lonely at times. 😅
I actually needed this video so much!I have friends i should be grateful for but none of them feel real, I don‘t feel safe, I feel jugded…I just want to have friends that feel real not just temporary!I want them to actually like me for being myself.I dont want to always listen to what they experienced or what plans they have I also want them to listen to my stuff…I dont want them to be jealous but feel proud and happy for me.But also when I find someone like that Im always the person who has to keep the frienship going.I dont feel like they actually want to be friends with me…
I hope you get genuine friends along the way😊
I think husbands are good at that. Once you find the one, you will realize he’s all you need, at least I’m like that with my man.
23 and have no friends. Between covid, going to school at a community college, deeply valuing my individuality and alone time, and working jobs where my coworkers are almost exclusively middle aged to elderly ladies, I have nobody in my life my own age. I’ve made friends in the past and I know I’ll make them again, it’s just kinda embarrassing to not have any friends right now and I don’t even know where to start looking for new ones in my 20s
Wow I didn’t know so many ppl could relate to this! I totally feel you btw! Everything that Zoe has sheared on this channel is unbelievablely close to my one life!
I used to cry for a good friend. At 39 years old, I don't seek it out. I rather be alone. Too many annoying people.
I also don't have any real friends
I already relate to this so much even though I haven't even watched the video yet. I'm almost in high school, and I'm surrounded by many friends. I get scared when I think of the future. The older you are, the harder it is to keep friendships I heard. Knowing that in the future, I may be lonely sometimes makes me sad. However, I'm glad to know that I have meaningful friends with me. I really hope we stay in touch throughout high school and beyond. I'm going to try to make as many good friends as I can, ones that will be there for me when I'm at my loneliest.
You won't hangout as much as you do during highschool. But true friendship can withstand time. It's surprising how some groups can pick up where they left off, so i think that's what makes me think of a strong friendship
I suppose I'm not in a bad position, since I have a circle of uni friends and one of old high school friends that I cherish a lot. It's just that the old friends seem closer to their new ones, and my new ones seem to be closer with their old ones, and I feel stuck in this weird adaptation cycle in which I can't fully figure out my place. At the end of the day I'm surrounded by great people that I can talk to transparently about everything, so I shouldn't complain. It's just that it would be nice to have the soulmate friend that everyone seems to have found already I guess
I just hope I find friends like you described some day. I usually feel unsafe with people, like I'm walking on thin ice and it's exhausting.
I never leave comments but I have to. I want to thank you for this video…I opened it to just watch another girl cry to I guess live through her sadness to forget about mine, but I got the opposite..I got help I needed..as I’ve been struggling with the same exact thing…you helped me immediately appreciate new friendships I made recently and I learned that it’s ok to let go when you dont click with the people you wanted to click so badly. It just means they are not for me, and maybe it’s not because I’m not able to give them enough attention but maybe it’s because they are not able to give me the energy I need from them. And it’s a very important lesson to learn.
I just lost my friendgroup… it is good cause they were hella toxic, still i am completely alone in my city, school and in my head. I do have a best friend, but she is still friends with the group and everything is weird for weeks. I don‘t know how to deal with all of this and want to start over but didn‘t know how. Your video helped. I thank you a thousand times. I believe with you sharing this i (and a lot of other people) can get over this feeling of complete loneliness. Thank you ❤
This video hits so hard. I was really struggling with loneliness but didn't rlly know how to fix it and I also felt ashamed that I was struggling with this when there were so many other people who have more severe problems in their life. I am currently in my "experiment" stage where I am figuring out ways to feel less lonely by catching up with old friends and initiating the hang outs with old and new friends. Thanks so much for this video Zoe
Your problems are just as severe as anyone elses. Emotional needs are important.
I needed to hear this. I'm a freshman in college and I have this long-distance bestfriend ever since elementary. I was always a one-call away friend to her, but now after watching the third part of the video I realized that I was holding on to her as I'm scared that without her, I will not have anyone else.
I would always be left on seen and sometimes my messages won't be even opened but I see her actively posting on other social media platforms.
Now instead of worrying what I might've done to upset her or what I can do to further connect with her, I just focus that energy into bettering myself.
I also felt like I had no one to lean on to but I realize I often see the pattern of having friends through movies and books that are all fictional.
omg I know exactly how you feel. I also have a long-distance best friend that I’ve had since elementary school, and I’ve always relied on our friendship too. like, “I may be lonely but at least I have her.” but I know she doesn’t need me as much as I need her (she has lots of other irl and online friends). hopefully that’ll change soon. I wish you all the best in your life, especially your future friendships!
This was a great video! I'm 25 now and I feel like I just made my first friend ever just two weeks ago. I always felt alone and lonely even when ppl were around like you said to the point I just wanted someone to love me so I would take any type of friendship or form of relationship but it wasn't until 2020 that I had to sit down and realize, I don't have friends. I never felt I matter to anybody that much and after my bestfriend ghosted me in last year 3 days before my birthday, I felt even more alone. 10 years gone but it felt like a relief because part of me felt she didn't want to be my friend anyways. So I had to really think about what is a friend? How to be it? etc and I realize I have no clue how to be one for myself so I am still doing that myself. I finally put myself back out there last month and met this wonderful human who I feel like we been friends forever but its only been 3 weeks. I hope to run into a few more ppl like that but until then, I am still going to learn how to be my own friend.....truly this time.
Since I’ve been alone most my life, I’m comfy with myself I’m trying to not turn people away because of my fears! I know good friends are out there, it gives me hope
the timing couldn’t be more perfect, i’ve been feeling like this deeply these days
This video is obviously relatable, I'm in high school and people get uninterested to me. I was left alone in one room, with four corners and everybody is having fun. While I'm here, left alone.
I also saw my other friends having fun and going outside. I felt trap, jealous and alone.
It is okay to not have friends bc I have seen this world some friends are like colors bc they always changes their color you have to be strong and you have to find the strongest one you are cause no one in this world will come to save you It will always be you so be strong
Wow... I just lost a friend today this popped up, this is so meaningful. I also feel lonely too, it's okay❤️
I recently just moved to the U.S and I am about to get into college full-time (in January), and watching this....I haven't been able to admit to anyone how lonely and confused and disoriented I feel. I feel out of order and no matter how I try to convince myself that I am enough, I still can't see past the act that I am an outsider, a thorn in the side. Seeing you talk about this however, and sitting through it is my first step towards admitting it, which I would like to believe is a step towards healing. Thank you Zoe. You're amazing❤
Yeah, it's really easy to become friendless post college. Especially if everyone, including yourself, moves to different cities and work from home.
This made me really miss having friends 😭 I don’t know how to meet people. I tried Bumble-friends and no one else wanted to keep up a conversation. I don’t see many people my age… I want to go back home where all my friends are
I swear losing friends is like going through the 7 stages of grief. It's absolutely painful, especially if you were somewhat the cause of the falling out. Anyways, great video! I really did enjoy it
This is so beautiful and sad in a good. Positive way I am experiencing loneliness and how to love myself by having no friend sometimes feel worthless or less attractive to have friends but I trust time .your story is so similar to mine but different
I can give my Pinterest if you want so we can be friends 💜
I'm going through what you're talking about now, it's been almost a year since this loneliness phase has started, I worked on myself a lot but I definitely sometimes feel like I would love to have a close friend that shares interests with me and we can hangout together, although it can get really hard for me in some days but I know that the best thing to do is just focusing on learning and discovering and that friend will come.
thank you for putting such a content out there, I enjoy watching your videos.
thank you so much for this video. for the transparency. you two have a beautiful relationship and seeing how you light up around each other makes me warm inside. i hope to find that kind of platonic love soon!!🥺❤🩹
Thank you for sharing this Zoe I've been struggling with loneliness ever since I graduated highschool 5 years ago. I'm a transfer student currently in my junior year at university and it's so hard to make friends here. Everyone has their own friend group and I just haven't found anyone compatible with me. The loneliness hurts so much 😢
you know what I know that I deserve better, and that's why I let go of my old friends cause they were taking my energy. I love myself more than anyone that I can't stay with someone who does not respect me. but still thought with no friends, I couldn't deny that I had this one friend but having a female friend hit differently, it just feels warm and more like home.
I recently lost both of my only two best friends. I believe the friendship ended because I started my own business. It was difficult for me at first to let go and heal but now I realized they are not mature and weren’t really my friends to begin with.
This video was edited sooo well so beautifully!!!!
Also this whole message and journey is understandable for me personally as there are all kinds of people going through different journeys and we do get to come across similar ones from across the world thanks to the internet.
Thank you so much for being raw and genuine and for sharing this topic and for your awesome creativity with it.
I've no real life friends since high school,now I've completed my school two years ago , I feel so bad when I see other girls laughing , eating and going together and I'm returning home alone 💔 it breaks my heart and daily makes me feel so so so low 💔 I've never found the ones I deserve.
Thank you for uploading this!! I was currently scrolling videos here at UA-cam sadly after seeing my friends from my old school hanging out including my bff.. i saw it at her instagram story...I was really sad because i feel left out..I constantly keep on reminding myself that it's okay but the fact that my bff 'left out' me, she hanged out with other people by going to the mall, shopping (we never got to do that) still makes me sad and lonely... her friends are pretty which also made me feel insecure.. my parents are there to give me emotional support so I'm thankful for them... now that I have onsite classes at my new school, it saddens me more to see my new classmates laughing and hanging out, being close to each other...it made me jealous... but this video will surely help me to heal me... so, again, thank you very much
Im 19 years old and i feel like something is missing in my life. It seems that everybody have fun, meet new people, go to the parties and there is me, completely lost and lonely. I've lost my only one friend last autumn and now i feel extremely alone and my social anxiety is getting worse. Thank you so much for your video, i hope that things will get better as well and i'll find my soulmate
Same...but i dont worry too much
We can be friends if you want i can give my Pinterest to you girls if you want 💜
@@Vintageshour45 do u have ig
@@begooddontactgood796 No but i have watsapp
@@begooddontactgood796 actually i downloaded instagram what is your username?
i love the raw emotions as well as thoughts in this. i once felt lonely, too. i don’t as much now. may we both heal & get better
I have been in college for four years and been "friends" with different groups but it makes me really sad that those i called friends have never taken a single photo of me or never said lets go get a coffee, now it's hitting hard and I felt lonely
Girl, I don’t know how I found this only now. I totally get it. It usually comes from childhood trauma that makes us punish ourselves and our inner child.
No one really tells you how lonely community college is until you get there 😔
This is such a beautiful video. A year ago, I went through a terrible friendship breakup. Still to do this day it makes me said. I am in therapy now, so I am trying to heal and get better. We didn’t breakup because of this, but she never put time and effort into our friendship. It was simply one-sided, and my therapist helped me see that!! This video brings me a great amount of comfort. You have no idea!!
This really hit. The loneliness really drive me insane someday. I was an introvert but I'm more of an ambivert now as I'm trying soo hard to make more friends and form better connection with ppl but it never go my way. I really envy those ppl that have someone to be there for them, who they can talk to, who they can call whenever they want or whenever something comes up, who they can hangout with, who they can share without feeling judged and so on. I really envy them. It's not like I don't have any friends, I'd be lying if I say so. But the thing is I have no one to turn to when I have any issues. Everyone is busy, no one understand, I try to text or call someone, even my "close friend" and all I got was "i'm busy now, let me call u later" and never hear again. All of the friends I have are the ppl I talk to when we meet or in class. After class, there's not even a single word. I have no one to turn to, I have no one to share my feelings with and damn, that feel like sht. srsly, I even quit socials cuz I can't stand seeing everyone hanging out, having fun, sharing the text sc with their friends, my friends hanging out without me or with their other friends and I'm just sitting in my room doing nth. Yeah, I'm jealous and I feel shit for feeling jealous. Ughhh. btw, if u reach here 'cuz u can relate, please cheer up, it'll past and eventho ppl aren't there for me, I try to be there for everyone so you can reach me through the contact i leave on my video. Cheer Up y'all. and sorry for the negativity as well.
We can be friends if you want i can my Pinterest with you 💖
I’m so thankful for this video. Sometimes my chest hurts because I so badly want a friend. Idk how it ever works out for anyone else.
hi,i don't usually leave comments, but i felt like i had to. so thank you i recently started my healing journey. thank you for inspiring me and making me change my mindset. i was feeling lonely, but watching this video made me realise that i should learn to be friend with myself first. thank you Zoe. and to anyone reading this, take care of you and let's heal together! lvy
"how much you put into any relationship is how much you get out" wow
Im in a new high school now (I’m a sophomore) and it’s been really hard for me I can relate to you so much that I’m getting emotional. When I was in middle school I had a really good situation where I always felt like I could start a conversation or call someone whenever and just text people randomly. Now I feel very alone. I went from calling my best friend to calling my mom whenever something happens. It’s a boarding school too so I’m constantly around these people who I just don’t know how to get close to. I’m so socially conscious and beat myself up when I’m not contributing to the conversation. I’m usually very extroverted so this has been very rough for me. I’m just glad to know that people in this same situation got past this. I’m actually very touched that you shared this thank you so much.
I seek hope anywhere i can find it.However momentary things giving me hope seem to be in vain.I know how it feels when u feel empty,bored and alone all day.Emotionally opening up to people,who were a mistake to trust nd then being called desperate..Being nice and supportive to everyone but the moment u expect the same from them,only to be disappointed..Making friends in the few limited opportunities u get,only for those to end up hurting you..At this point it feels like even an alien would make a better friend,or family....
I can relate 😢
i relate so much to this video. i finally had a few friends only towards the end of high school, and then the pandemic hit which prevented me from meeting and spending time with them in person - a few of them also were dealing with their mental health and so we drifted away while they took time for that and couldn't work on their friendships. when i went to college during the pandemic, i didn't like partying or drinking or any of those things so i struggled to meet people i liked and took really until the end of my first year to find even 1 or 2 people i could hang out with and talk to. recently though, all my friendships have been feeling so surface level. my old friends from home are either dealing with issues or living amazing lives with their new friends where they're so busy we hardly talk anymore. the friends around me feel surface level, as if we just hang out when i ask them to and people keep ignoring me or not responding. it gets so tiring to be lonely for so long in your life and you wonder if you just don't deserve close friendship at all. thank you so much for making this video, i feel a little less alone now for just wanting a close friend/friends. :(
i am still trying to get there because i struggle with vulnerability and communication but as i grow older i realize how human connections are so important. i never trusted my "friends" when i had them because i didn't like any of them at all. i was always the mom or caring friend so i ended up simply being a caring figure for them, i slowly walked into a depression and isolated myself completely through highschool. i started to think i didn't need no one because everyone ignored me when i needed help and no one ever cared about me, those were my friends so i started to think friendship could not exist. now i am in my second first year of college after a lot of hardships and still struggling so much but you realize you have no one to tell something to. i nearly lost myself a few months ago and i changed a lot of things and i achieved things and everything but i can't share it with no one because i have no one. that's the worst. no one cares about you at all. it is so important to try and try and keep trying
We can be friends i can give my Pinterest 💜
Zoe’s newest videos are everything, I love being able to see and understand everything she’s been through, it honestly feels like therapy!!! Besides, the topics discussed by her are all things that I’ve personally experienced so I just connect in a magical way with this videos 💗💗💗 xx zoe!
Wasn’t alivia called out for spreading misinformation on weightloss and exercise??? Not all the girly pops should be given a platform so easily…
yeah i thought about this too plus i wonder if they bonded over weight loss and if that’s a healthy way to start a friendship
I have friends who always take and never give. Same with my family. And recently my girlfriend broke up with me and I feel i will never be enough for anyone, only when someone needs something. I'm at a moment where I try to find a way to be happy without anyone, but it's really hard
Not sure what to say but this video felt comforting. I'm happy for you two for finding friends and each other
Idk. I feel like this day and age, it’s harder to make new friends and relationships if you haven’t already had them for years
This made me tear up from joy! I'm so grateful form my two best friends, they are like sisters to me!
thank you so much for this video
Finding friends or a friend takes time even if it feels like it takes forever. That doesn’t make you less valuable of a person, unless, you get to learn how to value your own self, to whom you will always be with for the rest of your life
I needed this so bad. So glad I found this.
Omg Alivia and you both are friends❤❤❤🥂
I actually have no friends. I mean friends who belong to our soul.
Anyway its okay atleast i have my husband for now and for the rest of my life if he can handle me that long 🥂
My best friend commited suicide. I miss her so much. I don’t want to replace her in any way but I’m having trouble finding friends. No one can understand me like her and I can’t trust anyone enough. All my darkest secrets died with her. She was the only person besides my bf to know everything about me. We had a special bond where we could argue and go back to normal, where she could offend and me not getting butthurt back, the only person in school I didn’t feel uncomfortable with. I hate that I didn’t pick her up that night. She deserved the world.
you are so strong 💔 may she rest in peace
My closest friends are literally states apart from me and I only will get to see 2 of them in a few months for only a day. I don't rarely feel the distance but it's there and I'll say it especially affects me when I see others being able to just crash at each other's places and just hang out whenever. I wish I had that "pintrest board life" but then again I'm pretty young and my dad tells me this all the time "patience is key, you'll get it when you least expect it"
It hurts. A hollow feeling on your chest. You feel like a burden. You are afraid of begin alone.
I understand u sis. I'd be ur friend honestly. I feel ppl dont cherish friendship enough. It's a a two way street.
Right
I wish from my heart for you to feel cherised and loved 💜
first! YOU HAVE US MY BABY!!! ❤
I love you so much for this. ❤️ Thank you thank you thank you for existing ❤️ your videos give me life ❤️ PS: I literally always get the feeling that I have no friends and have struggled with this for a long time
I RELATE TO THE CALLING SOMEONE TO SHARE THE MOST TRIVIAL THINGS AND ASKING FOR HELP WITHOUT FEELING LIKE YOU OWE THEM
My best friend ditched me yesterday and now I'm all alone 🙂 i have no one to hang out with I'm also single so I basically have no one to talk with 🙂 idk what to do and how to normalise it.
My best friend not only ditched me she even spread rumours about me and all my other frnds left and even she convinced my bf to brkup with me and now i have no frnds and I’m all alone depressed as hell
Every year my high school friends and I have a Christmas chat over Skype or FaceTime. We all live in different time zones. We only talk once a year. I look forward to it every year and I thought they did too. This year, like all of the past years I set an alarm and a reminder in my calendar for the online chat. No one showed up. No one even texted. Sitting there alone with my party hat on I felt truly truly alone. These were kids I knew for 10+ years. These were kids I trick or treated with. I’m shattered. I feel like they moved on and I was left alone.
I texted each of them individually wishing them a merry Christmas hoping I’d get an explanation but no, none of them responded. They all left me on read. There was no dramatic falling out or nothing, just one day, I meant nothing to any of them. I couldn’t make any close new friends after high school, so losing them meant I lost all of my friends.
I’m in this pit right now, and I feel worthless and I’ve gained weight in uni and my grades are awful so my sense of confidence has plummeted as well. But I think this video helped, or, I think it put my mind set in the right direction. Helps knowing others feel this way too.
This video is so beautiful to me because sisterhood and community it general is so important to me and I honestly believe everyone should has and should have their person/people. Genuinely happy you found your person ❤
This series is beautiful and is so healing. Thank you for speaking the truths we are all afraid to!
We need to stop romanticizing college, most people in my class were miserable, I was miserable, and now that I'm done with it, I can't even get a job! So we need to stop this bs
I always answer Instagram stories in diferent ways or send memes to people because it is a simple way to start or maintain a friendship. It's possible to make friends anywhere (one of my friends I met because our bus broke and we have to wait for the next one) the biggest point is: be open and look around to start conversations (like " I love your bag"). I really hope that the people who struggle without friendship find your friends mate. (English isn't my first language, please don't judge my poor grammar skills 😂)
I feel the same with ‘having no friends’. Going through high school I’ve had the same friends since going through different grades and we do school activities and events together, buy each other food but when we graduated from high school and months later I would message people and check in on them (something I NEVER go in return) not even like a random ‘Hi!’ After a few months. Also no one else would make outside plans to meet up and go out have a nice day together. And recently I had found a collectors item that I knew a friend would like because I remembered she’d liked that specific thing for years and bought it for her for Christmas but I never get and I have never gotten that type of long lasting, deep, nurturing & mutual friendship. I am definitely finding myself wanting certain people in my life now as friends and building my path to loving myself and appreciating myself.
Even when I started and finished college, I felt horrible. I couldn’t make friends even when I at least attempted but everyone either had an ego, was just taking advantage of me, or I didn’t feel an authentic connection to & I was so physically and emotionally drained I didn’t want to be bothered and on top of that I disliked myself so much.
My understanding of friendships has changed a lot in recent years. I am now with literally 0 friendships. There is no one to talk to even superficially, but I accepted it. I became a friend of myself, occupying my time with self-development and sometimes playing online to reduce my loneliness. But I have hope that in the future I might get friends and why not my soul mate
2:01 - what a beautiful shot. Great video, as always. Thank you for being so open with us!!!
Right now in that place of no friends and I am struggling. But if I manage to pass my exams and go to college in a few months I hope I will start over
Early card ✨
I clicked on this because I thought I was the only one who seem to be lonely. As a U.S. military member sent to Japan, I’m completely alone. I don’t relate to my fellow teammates who are wild and into partying, and it’s very difficult for me to make friends with any Japanese people or even go on a date since I’m a foreigner. So I’m completely alone.
Icl we need to stop looking into social media to show us what true friendship is. Social media, film etc are just short depictions of moments. We should define friendship on our own terms.
First😭💕💕
you look great btw!! I feel like I thought I was really lonely but I was forgetting about the friends I already have. I just had to be the one to put effort. Thank you for your insight:)
I wish I had friends who would invest in me, because I do to my friends. I do beyond what I could bear, just so I could be loved. I guess I am pulling back, and maybe chill alone for awhile.. maybe distract myself with getting a new job.
I get tired of being just alone, but I have no control in making people loving me.
I would love to be your friend we can talk through Pinterest if you want
Maybe they dont consider u as a friend..be happy.remember u r not alone🤗
I’ve not had what you would consider a best friend since sixth grade (1993). You can survive but it’s a seriously lonely existence. Feelings of worthlessness get so intense that it impacts patience to learn skills and new habits that would build confidence. Eventually you just have to hear new external sources that argue with your inner perception. For me it was martial arts and extreme music.
Yea sucks but I learned to go out and have fun alone. Would be better with a friend but life goes on, and I won’t miss out just because I’m alone
I want to be your friend. I can you my Pinterest if you want
Wow, to me it's so crazy how close of friends you guys actually are. To imagine that I found both of you separately like almost 2 years ago- and now come to find out y'all are actually friends! Blows my mind!!! How did you guys become friends??
Hey Zoe, I really liked this video because I like on how you are trying to be a human being when the world gets tough or hard or when you don't have friends. I have autism with a learning disability and I have always struggled with friendships due to people, some friends, and peers of them and other adults that know me get judgmental about me being different or how they believe that having a disability is bad. It's painful to deal the the harshness, however the only thing that I can do is be a human being who is trying my best, be compassionate for people who have struggles in life, volunteer to help the homeless, and think of good thoughts for people when they have struggles or who I care about. I want to let you know that you are very inspirational to me when i deal with hard days and that I'm always thinking of good thoughts for you to do well.
Havent watched it yet, but i know this will hit hard
The crossover episode i was never expecting but needed
i actually never have any close friends, if i did i don't know how to maintain the relationship. In 2020 i made some online friends which i wish they were my friends in real life as i rarely met people of same interest, but later on we all lost touch with each other. this is my college time but as i can't afford it due to financial issues, I'm totally alone. I'm in depression for a year now and having none to talk with is worst sometime. i don't know to whom rent my feels. everyday i tell myself I'm here for myself and everything will be fine soon. I think i need to be my own friend first. This video is really helpful! thank you so much zoe and i really hope i would meet some people whom i could call my close friends and enjoy those moments which i never able to enjoy in the past.
( sorry for my bad English. I'm still working on it.)