When I came out as a trans man to my boyfriend (he's a cis man), I told him that he has a boyfriend now. To which he replied, "I've always had a boyfriend". Since that day, he's always proud to tell people about his boyfriend, even if he lives in the rural south lol
8 місяців тому+21
I'm so glad to read this ! Stories are always about wife supporting their transitioning spouses but this is the first time I hear about a cis man supporting a ftm transition. i was really in need of reading this.
I’m a cis guy and I dated a trans guy a little while back, and it was one of the best relationships of my life. Even though things didn’t work out, I still think of him sometimes. He set a relationship gold standard for me
As someone who's trans and has a hard time not falling into the "I will never find someone" rabbit hole, stories and stuff like these makes me so happy that other trans people get to experience it and it gives me hope, I hope both you and him are doing well even if you aren't together anymore
@@nauuuurrrrri hope u find someone soon!!! but you're a stay, so ig it will be ezr ppl tend to fall in love easier with someone with such a good and refined taste
When I came out to my dad as transfemme, he told me of how he used to date a trans woman. Apparently, she was his favorite girlfriend over the years because she "felt more real than any of (his) other girlfriends." They ended the relationship on good terms because she was moving away. I wish I could've met Alyx. She seems like a good person. And yes, she chose her name because of Half Life.
Of course you will! True love is hard to find, but you being trans won't be a deterrent for the right person. I'm cis, but I'm saying this as a disabled woman who is still having issues accepting her disability and its implications... but has never had any problems when it comes to dating, and is happy in a long term relationship. You got this! The most important thing is that you love yourself
Me during the pandemic: oh gosh, I think I might be gay, how will I tell my husband?? My wife with the most impeccable timing ever: I'm a woman Me: oh...well that's solves that We've never been happier
That's so beautiful! I'd like to believe that sometimes people can subconsciously see others for who they are, and a part of you were both waiting for the right time to be true to yourselves and each other ❤️
To those who do sometimes feel like they can't be loved because they're trans, please know that that's not true! My husband helped me crack my egg after picking up on my dysphoria and chatting to me about it. He still loves me, but now I'm actually happier and feel safer in our own home. I can now communicate more clearly about how I'm feeling. And he makes sure every day to make sure I know he loves me. You are worthy of love, my friend. 💜 And if you see any hateful comments on this video, try to just scroll by and not let them ruin your day, because you are beautiful, loved, and worth so much more than transphobia. God bless!
I dated a transguy in my teens, he came out to me as trans a few months in and I bought him his first binder and paid for him to change his name on his 16th birthday (unsupportive family so had to wait until 16 so didn't need their permission). Nothing about the relationship changed other than I had a boyfriend and not a girlfriend
Sorry, how do you pay for someone to change their name? And how much does it cost? I'm a closeted trans guy so I feel like this might help me in the future.
@boss-fh6oz well in the UK you can change name via deedpoll, at the time it cost £12.50, so we went on the website he put in his chosen name as well as his dead name and I paid the bill at the end, I also had my mums friend officiate it because only certain people can do that and my mums friend was the mayor. I have no idea how it works in other countries, though
My wife and I are both trans. T4T is such an amazing situation for us. While we are an AMAB-AFAB, husband and wife with a whole bunch of kids, we appear to be a cookie-cutter middle class American family and we mostly are. Its amazing to have a partner who understands dysphoria on the same level and understands how to help you through that. That level of "i get it because ive experienced it" has been so wonderfully healing for both of us after coming outnand transitioning before meeting each other, we both experienced very painful ends to long that relationships that ended because we came out.
So I’m non-binary my wife and our girlfriend are both trans and we are very happy. We all support and encourage each other to express ourselves as well as comfort each other when one of us is not ready for something.
As someone whose relationship went up in flames (to put it very, very lightly) the literal moment I realized I am trans, this was a bittersweet video to watch I'm incredibly envious of those who didn't lose their entire lives when their egg cracked. That being said, it warms my heart that there are compassionate and understanding people out there supporting my trans siblings Here's hoping as time goes on and trans people become more culturally accepted stories like this become more and more common If you have a partner that accepts and supports you, give them a hug for me ❤
I am so unsure and scared of the steps that may be ahead of me. Watching your videos shows many facettes, normalized perviously 'weird' thoughts -I put thouse aside as 'wrong' in the past- and helped me to find a way to myself. I am not there yet, but it is becoming more clear to me. Thank you for taking away so much fear and guilt for just being different.
On Tuesdays, I get to be the husband. At some early point in our relationship, I mentioned that I was sad because I'll never get to be someone's husband. Ever since then, on Tuesdays, I am the husband and he is the wife. This affectionate little inside joke morphed into a loving affirmation from my spouse when I came out as non-binary three years ago. It's a small but tender thing for me - we even swap out wedding wine glasses that say "Mr." And "Mrs." - because it's a safe space he made before it ever came up. So, I actually DO get to be someone's husband, and I have the most amazing husband AND wife.
With the one where the wife started hormones when she was asked to wit a bit, PPD is postpartum depression. Pregnancy and birth can cause a lot of hormone issues with the person, so having the wife also start having hormone changes can be stressful.
This video was so freaking adorable omg! My amazing girlfriend and I are both trans girls and I am seriously so happy to be with her, I am so lucky that she ended up liking me back and I love her so much c:. Us both being trans hasn’t affected the relationship too much, it’s something that we were both very aware of for a long time before we started dating so there wasn’t really any shock or anything there lol, but I think one good way that it’s affected me at least is that I feel like she can understand a lot of what I often go through because she’s also trans, and because of that, she is so amazing whenever she’s comforting me about something, especially when it’s trans related, she can just instantly understand what I’m going through and is just always so amazing!!! Honestly I don’t really know why I’m rambling on so much about this lol, I guess I just wanted to share how amazing my gf is lol, anyway, if anyone read all of this, thank you and I hope you have a good day lmao c:
It's nice to hear stories of love with fellow trans people!!! Sometimes, I feel like me being trans is a hindrance to finding love and it's something that'll never happen. I want to find love one day but idk if that's ever possible. People used to ask me out as a joke, I never felt like I was "handsome" enough to draw attention. At this point in my life, whatever happens will happen. All I can really do is be more open towards other people. I used to shut myself out from other people because of the crap I've gone through. It would be nice to have someone in my life, it might not happen now or even later but I hope it happens one day, all I can do is just work on who I am for now.
If you are reading this, please, do believe, you will meet someone one day, because you are worthy, every human being is worthy. Greetings from Austria. I am a sic, married woman, but I do have a very close friend, who is ftm. He never came out to me, I just understood it and on a very hot summer day noticed the scars after the top surgery. I met him as a guy, so I accepted that without any problems. I never, never asked the questions or brought up the topic, but immediately started watching more trans related content,in order to understand my friend better. In any case, I am already happily married to my cis husband, so the case of my close ftm friend is just a pure friendship and my business is just love him as a person, support as a friend. I read your comment here and got a moment of empathy for you. Perhaps, because I had relatively similar feelings and thoughts about myself till I was 24...
@@svitlanasalo1179 Hey there, thank you for your comment, it was very kind of you!!!! I guess I'm just not used to being treated kindly, is all. If it'll happen, it'll happen, is all I can figure for now lol
PPD stands for postpartum depression. Someone who is at a very high risk of PPD can also be at risk for PPP (post-partum psychosis) which can get really dangerous for everyone involved. IMO it was really shitty that the partner to not wait to start HRT until that risk had passed to ensure that one person in the house had a stable hormonal state. It would have only been another two months. And I get that it's hard to wait, I'm trans too, but this is literally about the safety of the baby and the gestational parent.
This is making me cry.... I'm so scared that I can never support my partner (mtf) properly...... We live in a red state and I'm afraid I can never figure out how to help them reach where they want to be....
im curious how many people relate here, so im going to put this out there: im demiromantic (or was? i think hrt has changed that) and before that, i had only had 3 crushes, one of which was openly trans at the time, and two others who later came out as nonbinary. the trend continues, with nonbinary people being the most attractive to me, but it feels like my internal processes put two and two together before either one of us knew
I mean it's a well known fact that being nonbinary makes you 100 times hotter but idk In all seriousness though I have heard trans people who say that they thought they were just gay for dudes pre medical transitioning but then once their body started matching their brain they realized it was just their own dysphoria and actually liked women too. That's just one easy example but anything to be of help
You sound a lot like my girlfriend (I believe she's still comfy with the demiromantic label for herself), although the process of realizing our transness was the other way around for us. She came out two or three years before I did, and had a much more solid view of her identity than I did until I was about 21. Being with her made me look back on my relationships and realize that I'd spent my whole life dating men and hating it in an attempt to "fix" my trans and queer self. Being with her, getting to support her and be supported in the same breath, has been so eye opening and validating (not to mention fun). It took me a long time to realize, but I finally discovered that I'm a nonbinary demisexual lesbian... But I just shorten it to queer cause that label makes me feel extra comfy lol. Sometimes our brains and bodies can express internal desires in looking for specific partners, sometimes it's the opposite. Human nature is an incredibly nuanced and nonlinear thing, but I think that's what makes it fun.
My last day at work before top surgery, I brought in a tray of cookies with little chocolate dimples in the middle; coworkers not in the know said "Oh, how sweet"- coworkers in the know immediately started chanting "TITTY COOKIES" and pumping their fists in glee. 😂
PPD = PostPartum Depression. Where the hormone levels of the person who gave birth are a little wonky and they get depressed for a period of time after having a baby. It can last anywhere from a few weeks to up to years, I believe. (Not a medical professional and this is just me simplifying it.)
I'm trans and my husband is cis. I began my transition in 2004 and had a disastrous end to my first relationship with a cis man in 2011, so disastrous that I didn't even attempt to date again for eight years after that. I met my now husband in 2017 as a friend and we began officially dating in 2019. He loves me for the woman I am, before I met him I had never been close with a man who didn't see me as "one of the boys". But he was different. As I got to know him better I learned about his own struggles growing up in a very religious household and their idea of manhood, discovering his pansexuality and gender nonconformity as a young man and finding solace in the LGBT community. As someone who also struggled with being pushed into a certain idea of maleness as a young kid, I gained a deep understanding of why he never had any reservations with my trans identity. We got married earlier this year; he is my rock, my anchor, my everything.
Thank you so much for acknowledging the grief process as a normal stage for loved ones even when they still accept and love the trans person. I see a lot of people just rip into loved ones for being anti trans for having any negative emotions at all. It's lovely to see compassion for the loved ones as they support transitioning people.
When Jamie mentioned seeing someone blossoming after accepting themselves and being in an environment where they feel safe to do so, it made me think of how my son (11)(ftm) has changed so much since coming out almost 2 years ago. He's still a minor so he's only socially transitioned so far, but he is so much happier and more confident than he ever was before coming out.
I want to thank you for creating content like this. I've been an ally for most of my life, but my exposure to trans experiences has been limited, and it's very helpful to get perspective from inside authentic sources. I only wish more people would be more eager to learn from others. Found you from OT and Click. Y'all are adorbs!
they're macarons cuz macaroons are the shitty coconut shaving cookies that I hate. French macarons are made of almond flour and are so hard to make but they're way more delicious
I had watched some of this channel because I have been following OT for a while, but I became a regular here after I had met a trans man who I fell in love with. I'm happy that I have discovered more about what he's gone through and how to support him. In the process I've discovered a lot about myself also. Thank you from one Jamie to another!
@@chilirriessame!! I’m realising she may have been blocked- I mean, 1k+ comments on the channel, all of them reported, maybe this is the end of jammis biggest hater? Hope it is lol
This would be a great one to go over with Shaaba. Someone who has a trans partner. =D I often feel unloveable. I live on a tiny ignorant island, the person who runs the pride events here is a transmedicalist... So... Not great. They don't believe in non binary. And while I tick all their boxes, a lot of my friends don't. So I've burned my bridge there by not throwing them under the bus. D= But it does me happy to hear that other people are doing well. I'm glad that there are places out there where people have a chance.
Not a romantic relationsip, but my friend and I are both on T and he's been transitioning for longer than me, so for his two years on T, some friends and I are holding basically a party to celebrate two years of him slowly getting closer to what he wants. He usually passes pretty well, and sometimes I'm jealous of how well he passes, but I'm excited for him since he gets to sign the papers for top surgery in 2024.
I'm t4t married to my partner, we both have grown beside each other the past 7 years :) we're so alike and talk in unison so often we get asked if we grew up together. Trans joy exists, and it exists with one another
I loved hearing the stories of trans people blossoming once they come out!! It makes me so happy and hopeful. I feel trapped in my own life right now, so it's so nice to feel like there's light to find!! I love queer joy!!💜🏳⚧✨🏳🌈🥰
I met my cis, pansexual boyfriend earlier this year when I was still identifying as nonbinary. I have since come out to him as trans, and he's just been so supportive and I'm so happy. He's coming with me to my HRT appointment and I'm just so so glad to have him through this journey. It took me a very long time to get to this point and I'm so lucky to have him.
My grandfather has dementia. He's not super trans-supportive - it makes him uncomfortable I think and he doesn't understand it. We have a long-time family friend who is a trans man. My granddad knew him when he was (presenting as) a little girl. He knew him all through his transition, but I guess he's forgotten all that, because he refuses to believe that he was ever anything other than the man he is today. He won't believe he's trans. When we tell him he's trans he's like "But he's clearly a man, is he trying to say he's a woman now?" We point out that he still has obvious breasts, and my granddad says awkwardly "Well you know, some men have that problem." So I guess he just thinks our family friend is a cis guy who suffers from gynecomastia.
Both my partner and I are trans men and its the absolute best relationship ive ever and will be in. We really clicked when we met and are looking forward to being parents in thw future ❤
While I find your little slip ups as you read very relatable, don’t feel bad - you’re a real person and we all stumble over words occasionally. I really enjoy your videos, and this one is beautiful.
I adore my trans girlfriend 💗 shes been the vest partner I've had,we're so connected and with her it feels like having your best girl friend AND girlfriend?! Combo babyyyy! The only issue i have is when other people are bitchy or sticking their nose in our relationship by being straight up transphobic or rude to us simply because were a wlw relationship and my gf is trans.
Literally couldn't stop crying during this video. I'm a trans woman and I met my girlfriend online about 6 months ago and we've been dating for about 4 months. She is also a trans woman and I've never met anyone more lovely in my life. She inspires me to be a better version of myself everyday. She's the smartest, funniest kindest and most beautiful woman. Reading these stories of these couples had me looking to the future with excitement. We live in different countries but I'm hoping one day we'll be able to spend our time together in person. She is actually the one to introduce me to your videos, so honey if you're reading this, I LOVE YOU ❤❤❤
These videos give me hope that I’ll be able to see the love of my life flourish beside me. We’re stuck dealing with the reality of trans life being difficult and sometimes dangerous in our home country, but we’ll be able to to make wonderful things happen if we just keep working together. 💚 The future will be so bright Edit: I suppose “renew my hope” is more accurate, but c’est la vie.
about the whole growing into yourself after coming out: it's so true. personally, I have become way more confident after I did start accepting myself. I stand up for myself more, in general. I am way more aware of my boundaries with certain stuff and way more sure in sharing them. People don't realise often how much one can change in that sense after accepting themselves and coming out as themselves. I am generally very uncomfortable on the phone. And I am also very much uncomfortable talking to my mom after sundown because of certain mental issues she has that lead her to get into these depressive states that make her go on rants that make me uncomfortable. Before I came out, if she called me during those times, I'd answer shyly and just suffer through arguing with one of the people I care about the most because she just won't stop ranting about pointless arguments, feeling deeply uncomfortable. Because I was already uncomfortable 95% of the time anyway. Now, I choose my self and 3/4 times I won't answer. I finally learned to choose my own mental health and my own sanity and inner peace instead of other's at times. And I stopped seeing doing so as selfish. I am simply not uncomfortable being myself anymore.
Its so interesting to hear these sides, I'm poly and trans and only have one cis partner, my trabs fem partner is new in her journey but making progress but sometimes I feel my transness is erased in my home because of my non-bianary identity. The women in my house don't spend nearly as much time celebrating my identity as they do in theirs as women even as an AFAB NB I don't feel as seen. I hope to figure out how to make some progress on that but we do celebrate my wife's trans identity often and well.
The PPD thing was probably Post-Partum Depression. PPD can cause very sudden & drastic mood changes, so delaying HRT was probably the best decision for that situation. For the couple who live in the rural area and scared for their partner's safety, it really does depend on the area itself. I live in a rural area and most people prefer to look the other way, but there's also been some people that blindsided me with their acceptance. The area I live is heavily Christian and there are some really mean ones out there (ironically but unsurprisingly, the closer you get to the religious xtians, the less love & acceptance you find 🙄). Sometimes I'll catch myself daydreaming of living in the much bigger cities in the state I live in, but I also don't want to leave my home. I sympathize with this story heavily and I so wish there was an easy answer for it.
i’m non-binary and my partner is transmasc, and i LOVE being t4t. having somebody who just understands when i’m talking about my experience gender has been such a big change in a relationship for me, and it’s great to be able to relate to them!
I remember my cousin came out as a trans man I remember being quite shocked as it was quite unexpected but it wasn’t in a bad way I fully support him and iam so happy for him he deserves the world 🌎 He seems Mitch happier since coming out to us it’s nice to see
years of dating cis people as a trans man, none of them were successful for longer than the honeymoon period, now after almost two years with my NB partner (Christmas is our anniversary! >w
Me and my partner first dated when we were cis and now we're t4t :) We've changed so much together, I couldn't imagine a life without her. Also slightly related but I want to see more trans relationships in stories. Especially t4t ones. And I want to see antihero trans characters with dynamic character arcs or something idk I want all kinds of trans characters.
In nonbinary and considering T. Cost and career are still issues, but my bf has been supportive. We don't know if my hormones changing will affect his physical attraction to me and obviously he can't control that. Though he does say I look cute in a (costume) beard. I think the thing that matters most to me is that he'll love me either way, even if that love is expressed in different ways.
i really like this reddit you could bring it about more often, im kind of in the beginning of my transition so im desperate for any crumble of hope to be fair
Honestly, you and your spouse are so lovely. You'd make amazing parents. You should look into adopting or fostering 🥰🥰 there are other ways too of course.
As a trans woman i tried Cis girls and Cis men and just to be clear all of them were wonderful loving good humans. But i always felt something was missing , now my gf is a trans woman and everything seems to be so easy now .
8:30 Jamie here completely overlooking the (very, extremely real) possibility that the trans girlfriend is just terrified of social transition, and that she might really benefit from finding a safe space to begin socially transitionning to a few people at once. I understand that it's OK to not want to do e.g. hair removal, make-up, etc. But the fact of the matter is : a majority of trans women want to do at least some amount of social transition, and they want to present as (stereotypically) feminine in at least some way. It's far more likely that the trans girlfriend here is afraid to begin social transition outside of her home. I see this type of stuff in the MtF community all the time. People start taking hormones but they hope that that'll be enough to get them to "male-fail" and they just wait around for the hormones to magically turn them into girls, but most times it just doesn't really happen, and they end up getting stared at. You need a safe space, a community where you can experiment and gain confidence. Social transition proceeds like a snowball : you start small, and gradually build it outwards, using the confidence from the previous round of comings-out to bolster you and push you on to the next one. It's a scary process but you have to start it at some point. From what the post says, I don't think the trans girlfriend is just fully comfortable in her transition. I don't think it's that she doesn't /want/ any of that stuff. But she needs to find the courage to start, and the community that'll support her with that.
My trans gf and i fell in love accidentally when we started spending a lot of time together as friends. She started out very nervous about herself, even though she'd been on hormones for a couple years. 4 months in, being loved and validated by a partner has given her a new confidence, helped her actually like herself in a way she didn't know she could, and watching her blossom has been an incredible privilege. I cant wait to see how much more she'll grow into herself over the years, because im already so impressed by her progress ❤
Omg I really feel the thing of feeling like you'll never find someone who loves you in the same way you love them. I'm thinking about the posibility of getting top surgery in the future and, since I probably won't be on hormones, I feel like I'm going to exist as an in between form that most people won't be attracted to, even though it's what I think would make me the happiest
These stories were so lovely that I, although quite content with my very single life, noticed I was thinking about how fun it would be to go on a date with my wife. 😂
I am non-binary and I have dated Trans Women before who do not pass. The safety concerns are real. Honestly I would talk to my partner about my worries. You two may need to relocate to a more urban area.
I love happy Jamie. Often I do not watch a video because I am having to shield myself from the anti trans* stuff you are reacting to, so I really enjoy when you make videos that have some good news in there. Hope many US folks pre-order your book! Looking forward to it's availability in Europe :D 💙💓🤍
I’m a cis guy but my girlfriend is trans, I wouldn’t have it any other way. To me, I sometimes even forget she’s trans, cis, whatever, cause it doesn’t matter to me. I love her and nothing will change that.
this is so pure and wholesome i love it. I have no way of knowing, but i think my partner is the same way and trust me, that feeling makes us so happy. she's lucky to have you
Married 18 years. I identified as a lesbian and my spouse transitioned after we got married - it was a bit hard at times but we walked together and are stronger than ever. We are partners in every way - each of us taking on tasks that we are good at. He is great at the laundry while I excel at fixing things. We say f*ck gender roles and his motto is "Masculinity is what you make it". (Although it took him a long time to get there). Meanwhile he has a full beard that makes his cis brothers jealous, and I have a husband that is empathetic and understanding for female issues :) support, patience, and lots and lots of talking
That sounds incredibly wholesome, I'm happy for you both! Please let me know if I'm overstepping, but how did you cope with this at the time, considering you identified as a lesbian? Were you attracted to him after his transition?
@luchirimoya it was a conscious choice to stay. In any relationship your partner will change as they age and grow. It wasn't easy, I won't lie, and we almost didn't make it for a while. But in any marriage you wake up and choose every day to love your partner. Mine changed a bit more than expected, but over the years I have changed too. I still see the eyes of the person I fell in love with all those years ago, behind wrinkles/ grey hairs / and an unexpected beard.
I will be forever grateful for my family who, when my partner came out as trans, said they love her like a daughter(she's mtf) and that she treats me better than any of my ex's have. We're getting married next year ❤ ☺️
Your family cares that you are happy. Having the experience of a truly loving family, makes it easier for people to recognize healthy relationships, and to find a truly loving partner. I’m happy for you!
My partner came out to me as trans after we'd been dating for about a year, and about half a year later I came out to them as being nonbinary - helping her express her true self helped me feel comfortable expressing mine. We both had our genders changed on our birth certificates, and when name changes happened we both changed our last names to the same name.
I’ve just recently started dating a trans woman, and so far, the only adjustment I’ve had to make is that as a cis lesbian in my late 30s who’s never had to worry about birth control before, I had to figure it all out later in life compared to other cis women. Luckily, I have a very supportive family doctor who helped me navigate the whole thing, even reaching out to a compassionate care charity for my birth control of choice when my insurance didn’t cover it. My girlfriend is so lovely, and I’m so happy to have her in my life!
@@chrisbfreelanceAre all men who like pegging bisexual? No. Are lesbians who enjoy sex with strap-ons all bisexual? No. If she's a lesbian, she only likes women. Girl dick is still *girl.* Some people discover they are bisexual later in life, but that doesn't seem to be the case here. If she says she's a lesbian, she's a lesbian.
@@chrisbfreelance or a trans woman apparently. can't you read? it's said quite explicitly in the original comment. i don't understand why you're confused.
@chrisbfreelance Because I'm not. I'm a lesbian, and am only attracted to women. This includes trans women. I'm not attracted to men, including trans men. In fact, I've had the opportunity to sleep with men who I've found aesthetically attractive, but my libido very clearly went "nope, that's a dude". When I'm with my girlfriend, my libido goes "Pretty lady! 😍" Hope that helps.
Hello, person reading the comments! Did you know you are amazing? I am so proud of you! Whatever is going on in your life, remember, you've got this! You are so much stronger than you think! 🦕🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🦖
My bf has been here for me when I was a girl and continued to be here for me through my gender confusion and realising I'm nb. He called me handsome and his bf recently, it feels so nice.
8 місяців тому+6
I'm so glad to read this ! Stories are always about wife supporting their transitioning spouses but never about a man supporting a ftm transition. i was really in need of reading this.
The day of my 1 year anniversary of coming out trans, my partner and I had gone to the zoo with friends of ours. I'd still been nervous about passing back then, especially since I hadn't been on HRT for very long. We ran into some coworkers of my partner and every time they would, without hesitation, introduce me as their girlfriend. Absolutely one of the best feelings of my life, and I can't wait till girlfriend, becomes wife.
@rcdune7132 that's never happening, thank you for your concern. I waited 33 years to be who I was always supposed to be, I'm not about to go back to that unhappy creature
I don't know if you'll see this Jamie, but I used to show your videos to my dad over 5 years ago to help him become more accepting. It slowly but surely worked and now YEARS later hes a fully fledged ally! On a much sweeter side note your videos opened up a whole world for me, helped me realize being a trans man was an option and even led to my mom asking if I was trans a week after I came out to some friends (dw it was a nice story). I have so many great memories of sitting in our living room and watching your videos with my mom. She sadly passed away this year but she loved your content and was the best mom any queer kid could've asked for (though I am a grown adult now and have been for awhile). Thank you for just being you and making all of the wonderful, and positive content you make! You have surely changed many lives for the better!
So sorry for your loss. May her love follow you everywhere you go. I’m so glad she got to truly see you before she passed :’’’) Also awesome to hear your dad’s come around and that you have good friends and all. Much love to you!
I'm an amab person and two years ago I started doubting my gender and identifying as non binary using all pronouns but in fact i never had the confidence to use different pronouns than he/him even if when my partner occasionally used she/her i would melt in joy. This summer i realised i am in fact a girl and, even if we broke up (we are still good friends), i felt the necessity to text them to say thanks for being supportive and helping me in my self discovery when even I wasn't able
As a trans boy, I can say that I actually find that T4T relationships are what's best for me, because my partner understands what I'm going through and we can help each other. Anyone can relate?
Personally, I relate. I've been with alot of cisgender people and when I started dating trans/nonbinary people like myself, I felt alot more comfortable
My fiancé and I met believing we were a pair of cis lesbian girls. Took us about four years before I realized I wasn’t and spent years questioning and figuring out my gender (non-binary, potentially some gender fluidity), and he took some time to think on himself after I came out, and came to realize he’s a very lovely trans man! 7 years into our relationship and we’re happier than ever.
When I came out as a trans man to my boyfriend (he's a cis man), I told him that he has a boyfriend now. To which he replied, "I've always had a boyfriend". Since that day, he's always proud to tell people about his boyfriend, even if he lives in the rural south lol
I'm so glad to read this ! Stories are always about wife supporting their transitioning spouses but this is the first time I hear about a cis man supporting a ftm transition. i was really in need of reading this.
Awe! That's so sweet!
I'm so happy for you! Congratulations to you both!
I’m a cis guy and I dated a trans guy a little while back, and it was one of the best relationships of my life. Even though things didn’t work out, I still think of him sometimes. He set a relationship gold standard for me
dont claim youre gay
King shit fr fr
Absolutely love that.
As someone who's trans and has a hard time not falling into the "I will never find someone" rabbit hole, stories and stuff like these makes me so happy that other trans people get to experience it and it gives me hope, I hope both you and him are doing well even if you aren't together anymore
@@nauuuurrrrri hope u find someone soon!!! but you're a stay, so ig it will be ezr
ppl tend to fall in love easier with someone with such a good and refined taste
My spouse of 10 years came out to me as trans . So we re-did our marriage with the correct clothes
That's amazing 😭
@@Murphy-er9bg we even actually worn the same clothing. We are very close in size so they could where my clothes and Vis versa
Omg that's adorable!
@@bestaqua23that is so adorable
aww cute
When I came out to my dad as transfemme, he told me of how he used to date a trans woman. Apparently, she was his favorite girlfriend over the years because she "felt more real than any of (his) other girlfriends." They ended the relationship on good terms because she was moving away. I wish I could've met Alyx. She seems like a good person. And yes, she chose her name because of Half Life.
I still don't know if I'll ever find love as a trans guy but damn this makes me hopeful sometimes
dw you'll find someone ❤
Love is so hard to find
and even harder to define
Anyone who wouldn't date you because youre trans isn't worth your time ❤❤
Of course you will! True love is hard to find, but you being trans won't be a deterrent for the right person. I'm cis, but I'm saying this as a disabled woman who is still having issues accepting her disability and its implications... but has never had any problems when it comes to dating, and is happy in a long term relationship. You got this! The most important thing is that you love yourself
You absolutely will!!!
Me during the pandemic: oh gosh, I think I might be gay, how will I tell my husband??
My wife with the most impeccable timing ever: I'm a woman
Me: oh...well that's solves that
We've never been happier
That's so beautiful! I'd like to believe that sometimes people can subconsciously see others for who they are, and a part of you were both waiting for the right time to be true to yourselves and each other ❤️
Thats actually really funny, what a coincidence LOL
Luck: 100
"Honey I might have some bad new"
"Me too, I think I might be gay"
"... honey I have some great news"
@@jondw"Honey, I think I'm a lesbian."
"Oh my god - me too!"
To those who do sometimes feel like they can't be loved because they're trans, please know that that's not true! My husband helped me crack my egg after picking up on my dysphoria and chatting to me about it. He still loves me, but now I'm actually happier and feel safer in our own home. I can now communicate more clearly about how I'm feeling. And he makes sure every day to make sure I know he loves me.
You are worthy of love, my friend. 💜 And if you see any hateful comments on this video, try to just scroll by and not let them ruin your day, because you are beautiful, loved, and worth so much more than transphobia.
God bless!
I dated a transguy in my teens, he came out to me as trans a few months in and I bought him his first binder and paid for him to change his name on his 16th birthday (unsupportive family so had to wait until 16 so didn't need their permission). Nothing about the relationship changed other than I had a boyfriend and not a girlfriend
Sorry, how do you pay for someone to change their name? And how much does it cost? I'm a closeted trans guy so I feel like this might help me in the future.
@boss-fh6oz well in the UK you can change name via deedpoll, at the time it cost £12.50, so we went on the website he put in his chosen name as well as his dead name and I paid the bill at the end, I also had my mums friend officiate it because only certain people can do that and my mums friend was the mayor. I have no idea how it works in other countries, though
🤨 Sounds like a supportive family to me.
@@British_Rogue how?
@@bambino05 How does it not? She was a little girl. A child.
My wife and I are both trans. T4T is such an amazing situation for us. While we are an AMAB-AFAB, husband and wife with a whole bunch of kids, we appear to be a cookie-cutter middle class American family and we mostly are. Its amazing to have a partner who understands dysphoria on the same level and understands how to help you through that. That level of "i get it because ive experienced it" has been so wonderfully healing for both of us after coming outnand transitioning before meeting each other, we both experienced very painful ends to long that relationships that ended because we came out.
So I’m non-binary my wife and our girlfriend are both trans and we are very happy. We all support and encourage each other to express ourselves as well as comfort each other when one of us is not ready for something.
Y'all sound like a lovely family!
You sound like a cuck, but hey if that works for you that's completely fine
>my wife and our girlfriend
Why do I keep running into polyamorous people online?
@@BlooMonkiManignore bloomonk. Dude defends homophobes all over the comment section. Really likes making crap up.
@@wacawaka1802 How?
As someone whose relationship went up in flames (to put it very, very lightly) the literal moment I realized I am trans, this was a bittersweet video to watch
I'm incredibly envious of those who didn't lose their entire lives when their egg cracked. That being said, it warms my heart that there are compassionate and understanding people out there supporting my trans siblings
Here's hoping as time goes on and trans people become more culturally accepted stories like this become more and more common
If you have a partner that accepts and supports you, give them a hug for me ❤
I am so unsure and scared of the steps that may be ahead of me. Watching your videos shows many facettes, normalized perviously 'weird' thoughts -I put thouse aside as 'wrong' in the past- and helped me to find a way to myself. I am not there yet, but it is becoming more clear to me. Thank you for taking away so much fear and guilt for just being different.
nice ❤
On Tuesdays, I get to be the husband. At some early point in our relationship, I mentioned that I was sad because I'll never get to be someone's husband. Ever since then, on Tuesdays, I am the husband and he is the wife. This affectionate little inside joke morphed into a loving affirmation from my spouse when I came out as non-binary three years ago. It's a small but tender thing for me - we even swap out wedding wine glasses that say "Mr." And "Mrs." - because it's a safe space he made before it ever came up. So, I actually DO get to be someone's husband, and I have the most amazing husband AND wife.
This is so beautiful ❤️❤️❤️❤️
With the one where the wife started hormones when she was asked to wit a bit, PPD is postpartum depression. Pregnancy and birth can cause a lot of hormone issues with the person, so having the wife also start having hormone changes can be stressful.
Regular reminder that you're all awesome, beautiful and valid little spuds, just the way you are ❤🧡💛💚💙💜 Love you all ❤🧡💛💚💙💜
This video was so freaking adorable omg! My amazing girlfriend and I are both trans girls and I am seriously so happy to be with her, I am so lucky that she ended up liking me back and I love her so much c:. Us both being trans hasn’t affected the relationship too much, it’s something that we were both very aware of for a long time before we started dating so there wasn’t really any shock or anything there lol, but I think one good way that it’s affected me at least is that I feel like she can understand a lot of what I often go through because she’s also trans, and because of that, she is so amazing whenever she’s comforting me about something, especially when it’s trans related, she can just instantly understand what I’m going through and is just always so amazing!!! Honestly I don’t really know why I’m rambling on so much about this lol, I guess I just wanted to share how amazing my gf is lol, anyway, if anyone read all of this, thank you and I hope you have a good day lmao c:
It's nice to hear stories of love with fellow trans people!!! Sometimes, I feel like me being trans is a hindrance to finding love and it's something that'll never happen. I want to find love one day but idk if that's ever possible. People used to ask me out as a joke, I never felt like I was "handsome" enough to draw attention. At this point in my life, whatever happens will happen. All I can really do is be more open towards other people. I used to shut myself out from other people because of the crap I've gone through. It would be nice to have someone in my life, it might not happen now or even later but I hope it happens one day, all I can do is just work on who I am for now.
If you are reading this, please, do believe, you will meet someone one day, because you are worthy, every human being is worthy.
Greetings from Austria.
I am a sic, married woman, but I do have a very close friend, who is ftm. He never came out to me, I just understood it and on a very hot summer day noticed the scars after the top surgery. I met him as a guy, so I accepted that without any problems. I never, never asked the questions or brought up the topic, but immediately started watching more trans related content,in order to understand my friend better.
In any case, I am already happily married to my cis husband, so the case of my close ftm friend is just a pure friendship and my business is just love him as a person, support as a friend.
I read your comment here and got a moment of empathy for you. Perhaps, because I had relatively similar feelings and thoughts about myself till I was 24...
@@svitlanasalo1179 Hey there, thank you for your comment, it was very kind of you!!!! I guess I'm just not used to being treated kindly, is all. If it'll happen, it'll happen, is all I can figure for now lol
PPD stands for postpartum depression. Someone who is at a very high risk of PPD can also be at risk for PPP (post-partum psychosis) which can get really dangerous for everyone involved.
IMO it was really shitty that the partner to not wait to start HRT until that risk had passed to ensure that one person in the house had a stable hormonal state. It would have only been another two months. And I get that it's hard to wait, I'm trans too, but this is literally about the safety of the baby and the gestational parent.
This is making me cry.... I'm so scared that I can never support my partner (mtf) properly...... We live in a red state and I'm afraid I can never figure out how to help them reach where they want to be....
Well, here's something to bear in mind: you _want_ to support her, and that counts for a lot.
Just do your best. The problem isn't you its the government. As long as she knows she has your love and support hopefully you two will be ok.
Thank you for this you’re right about the hate out there. Very much needed some love.
im curious how many people relate here, so im going to put this out there: im demiromantic (or was? i think hrt has changed that) and before that, i had only had 3 crushes, one of which was openly trans at the time, and two others who later came out as nonbinary. the trend continues, with nonbinary people being the most attractive to me, but it feels like my internal processes put two and two together before either one of us knew
I mean it's a well known fact that being nonbinary makes you 100 times hotter but idk
In all seriousness though I have heard trans people who say that they thought they were just gay for dudes pre medical transitioning but then once their body started matching their brain they realized it was just their own dysphoria and actually liked women too. That's just one easy example but anything to be of help
You sound a lot like my girlfriend (I believe she's still comfy with the demiromantic label for herself), although the process of realizing our transness was the other way around for us. She came out two or three years before I did, and had a much more solid view of her identity than I did until I was about 21. Being with her made me look back on my relationships and realize that I'd spent my whole life dating men and hating it in an attempt to "fix" my trans and queer self. Being with her, getting to support her and be supported in the same breath, has been so eye opening and validating (not to mention fun).
It took me a long time to realize, but I finally discovered that I'm a nonbinary demisexual lesbian... But I just shorten it to queer cause that label makes me feel extra comfy lol. Sometimes our brains and bodies can express internal desires in looking for specific partners, sometimes it's the opposite. Human nature is an incredibly nuanced and nonlinear thing, but I think that's what makes it fun.
My last day at work before top surgery, I brought in a tray of cookies with little chocolate dimples in the middle; coworkers not in the know said "Oh, how sweet"- coworkers in the know immediately started chanting "TITTY COOKIES" and pumping their fists in glee. 😂
PPD = PostPartum Depression. Where the hormone levels of the person who gave birth are a little wonky and they get depressed for a period of time after having a baby. It can last anywhere from a few weeks to up to years, I believe. (Not a medical professional and this is just me simplifying it.)
I'm trans and my husband is cis. I began my transition in 2004 and had a disastrous end to my first relationship with a cis man in 2011, so disastrous that I didn't even attempt to date again for eight years after that. I met my now husband in 2017 as a friend and we began officially dating in 2019. He loves me for the woman I am, before I met him I had never been close with a man who didn't see me as "one of the boys". But he was different. As I got to know him better I learned about his own struggles growing up in a very religious household and their idea of manhood, discovering his pansexuality and gender nonconformity as a young man and finding solace in the LGBT community. As someone who also struggled with being pushed into a certain idea of maleness as a young kid, I gained a deep understanding of why he never had any reservations with my trans identity. We got married earlier this year; he is my rock, my anchor, my everything.
I really loved these posts!!! So good to hear other peoples views on transitioning. Thanks Jamie!!
Thank you so much for acknowledging the grief process as a normal stage for loved ones even when they still accept and love the trans person. I see a lot of people just rip into loved ones for being anti trans for having any negative emotions at all. It's lovely to see compassion for the loved ones as they support transitioning people.
When Jamie mentioned seeing someone blossoming after accepting themselves and being in an environment where they feel safe to do so, it made me think of how my son (11)(ftm) has changed so much since coming out almost 2 years ago. He's still a minor so he's only socially transitioned so far, but he is so much happier and more confident than he ever was before coming out.
i love stories like this
Goddamn Jamie coming out with the Dad joke on the first post immediately. Made me giggle a lot 😂
One of my favorite things about being bi is knowing that if either of my partners were to transition, I'd still love them the same!
I want to thank you for creating content like this. I've been an ally for most of my life, but my exposure to trans experiences has been limited, and it's very helpful to get perspective from inside authentic sources. I only wish more people would be more eager to learn from others. Found you from OT and Click. Y'all are adorbs!
I think it's really important to engage a therapist in these kinds of situations because that can be so helpful.
Macarons are the French sandwich type cookie. Macaroons are a coconut cookie (which I think are usually eaten for Passover)
they're macarons cuz macaroons are the shitty coconut shaving cookies that I hate. French macarons are made of almond flour and are so hard to make but they're way more delicious
macaroons are delicious and macarons are nasty, perish you fiend >:-(((((
my first gf was a trans girl, she was basically how i realized i'm a lesbian
I pre-ordered your book ahead of my sibling's birthday!
This gives me hope.
The last one made me absolutely SOB!
I had watched some of this channel because I have been following OT for a while, but I became a regular here after I had met a trans man who I fell in love with. I'm happy that I have discovered more about what he's gone through and how to support him. In the process I've discovered a lot about myself also. Thank you from one Jamie to another!
You make me crying for a lot of reasons with that video 🥺♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️😩
Has anyone noticed that Kate wick hasn’t commented at all recently?
Ps: you are valid!
my favorite katewick moment is when they don't
@@chilirriessame!! I’m realising she may have been blocked- I mean, 1k+ comments on the channel, all of them reported, maybe this is the end of jammis biggest hater?
Hope it is lol
@@CrowExistingggggdon’t forget Ville and that thomaschester or whatever his name is
@@LemonAid82yeah, I think it’s horrid people want to hate comment, like.. they’re attention seekers. I wish we could knock some sense into them. :/
@@CrowExistingggggJeremy Lee too
This would be a great one to go over with Shaaba. Someone who has a trans partner. =D
I often feel unloveable. I live on a tiny ignorant island, the person who runs the pride events here is a transmedicalist... So... Not great. They don't believe in non binary. And while I tick all their boxes, a lot of my friends don't. So I've burned my bridge there by not throwing them under the bus. D=
But it does me happy to hear that other people are doing well. I'm glad that there are places out there where people have a chance.
I'm sorry that you're in that environment. :/ Praying that they'll realise that ALL queer identities are valid.
God bless!
loveeee your videosss
Not a romantic relationsip, but my friend and I are both on T and he's been transitioning for longer than me, so for his two years on T, some friends and I are holding basically a party to celebrate two years of him slowly getting closer to what he wants. He usually passes pretty well, and sometimes I'm jealous of how well he passes, but I'm excited for him since he gets to sign the papers for top surgery in 2024.
Having a trans partner is awesome! 😁🏳️⚧️
Absolutely it is! My girlfriend is trans and I love her to bits.
@@anomalyfox5186so you're dating a man... So your boyfriend then...
@@anomalyfox5186 Ignore the transphobes, I'm glad you're happy.
Hell yeah, now if only I had a partner at all!!
@@Lord-Griffgo make your eyes turn to X’s, bigot
I'm t4t married to my partner, we both have grown beside each other the past 7 years :) we're so alike and talk in unison so often we get asked if we grew up together. Trans joy exists, and it exists with one another
I loved hearing the stories of trans people blossoming once they come out!! It makes me so happy and hopeful. I feel trapped in my own life right now, so it's so nice to feel like there's light to find!! I love queer joy!!💜🏳⚧✨🏳🌈🥰
My girfriend is trans, doesn’t matter to me, no different to dating a cis woman, we still argue over the same shit lol 😂 love her loads xxx
I met my cis, pansexual boyfriend earlier this year when I was still identifying as nonbinary. I have since come out to him as trans, and he's just been so supportive and I'm so happy. He's coming with me to my HRT appointment and I'm just so so glad to have him through this journey. It took me a very long time to get to this point and I'm so lucky to have him.
I couldn't finish your last video but this ❤️ love is indeed love is love 💕
My grandfather has dementia. He's not super trans-supportive - it makes him uncomfortable I think and he doesn't understand it. We have a long-time family friend who is a trans man. My granddad knew him when he was (presenting as) a little girl. He knew him all through his transition, but I guess he's forgotten all that, because he refuses to believe that he was ever anything other than the man he is today. He won't believe he's trans. When we tell him he's trans he's like "But he's clearly a man, is he trying to say he's a woman now?" We point out that he still has obvious breasts, and my granddad says awkwardly "Well you know, some men have that problem." So I guess he just thinks our family friend is a cis guy who suffers from gynecomastia.
Both my partner and I are trans men and its the absolute best relationship ive ever and will be in. We really clicked when we met and are looking forward to being parents in thw future ❤
While I find your little slip ups as you read very relatable, don’t feel bad - you’re a real person and we all stumble over words occasionally.
I really enjoy your videos, and this one is beautiful.
I adore my trans girlfriend 💗 shes been the vest partner I've had,we're so connected and with her it feels like having your best girl friend AND girlfriend?! Combo babyyyy! The only issue i have is when other people are bitchy or sticking their nose in our relationship by being straight up transphobic or rude to us simply because were a wlw relationship and my gf is trans.
PPD is postpartum depression. I don’t see how someone else’s hormones would impact your own mental health, especially given how slow acting HRT is.
Literally couldn't stop crying during this video. I'm a trans woman and I met my girlfriend online about 6 months ago and we've been dating for about 4 months. She is also a trans woman and I've never met anyone more lovely in my life. She inspires me to be a better version of myself everyday. She's the smartest, funniest kindest and most beautiful woman.
Reading these stories of these couples had me looking to the future with excitement. We live in different countries but I'm hoping one day we'll be able to spend our time together in person.
She is actually the one to introduce me to your videos, so honey if you're reading this, I LOVE YOU ❤❤❤
oh my god im holding back tears in school rn this is so sweet and makes me so happy 😭♥
These videos give me hope that I’ll be able to see the love of my life flourish beside me. We’re stuck dealing with the reality of trans life being difficult and sometimes dangerous in our home country, but we’ll be able to to make wonderful things happen if we just keep working together. 💚 The future will be so bright
Edit: I suppose “renew my hope” is more accurate, but c’est la vie.
I am loving this video - so freaki. Wholesome
about the whole growing into yourself after coming out: it's so true. personally, I have become way more confident after I did start accepting myself. I stand up for myself more, in general. I am way more aware of my boundaries with certain stuff and way more sure in sharing them. People don't realise often how much one can change in that sense after accepting themselves and coming out as themselves. I am generally very uncomfortable on the phone. And I am also very much uncomfortable talking to my mom after sundown because of certain mental issues she has that lead her to get into these depressive states that make her go on rants that make me uncomfortable. Before I came out, if she called me during those times, I'd answer shyly and just suffer through arguing with one of the people I care about the most because she just won't stop ranting about pointless arguments, feeling deeply uncomfortable. Because I was already uncomfortable 95% of the time anyway.
Now, I choose my self and 3/4 times I won't answer. I finally learned to choose my own mental health and my own sanity and inner peace instead of other's at times. And I stopped seeing doing so as selfish. I am simply not uncomfortable being myself anymore.
Its so interesting to hear these sides, I'm poly and trans and only have one cis partner, my trabs fem partner is new in her journey but making progress but sometimes I feel my transness is erased in my home because of my non-bianary identity. The women in my house don't spend nearly as much time celebrating my identity as they do in theirs as women even as an AFAB NB I don't feel as seen. I hope to figure out how to make some progress on that but we do celebrate my wife's trans identity often and well.
I'm the trans partner, and when she texts me I'm the trans responder 😂 (it's even funnier because a transponder is a communication device)
This is one of those comments that made me groan, but I had to like it because that was a damn good pun. 🤣
The PPD thing was probably Post-Partum Depression. PPD can cause very sudden & drastic mood changes, so delaying HRT was probably the best decision for that situation.
For the couple who live in the rural area and scared for their partner's safety, it really does depend on the area itself. I live in a rural area and most people prefer to look the other way, but there's also been some people that blindsided me with their acceptance. The area I live is heavily Christian and there are some really mean ones out there (ironically but unsurprisingly, the closer you get to the religious xtians, the less love & acceptance you find 🙄). Sometimes I'll catch myself daydreaming of living in the much bigger cities in the state I live in, but I also don't want to leave my home. I sympathize with this story heavily and I so wish there was an easy answer for it.
once i noticed the top of Jamie's beard looks like a tiny bow tie, I couldnt unsee it lol Looking extra dapper today Jamie lol
My girlfriend has found ur videos great as I'm a trans guy ! Thank you 😊
i’m non-binary and my partner is transmasc, and i LOVE being t4t. having somebody who just understands when i’m talking about my experience gender has been such a big change in a relationship for me, and it’s great to be able to relate to them!
Aww I'm just watching this video because I'm planning to write a romance novel just like this!
I remember my cousin came out as a trans man
I remember being quite shocked as it was quite unexpected but it wasn’t in a bad way I fully support him and iam so happy for him he deserves the world 🌎
He seems Mitch happier since coming out to us it’s nice to see
years of dating cis people as a trans man, none of them were successful for longer than the honeymoon period, now after almost two years with my NB partner (Christmas is our anniversary! >w
Me and my partner first dated when we were cis and now we're t4t :) We've changed so much together, I couldn't imagine a life without her.
Also slightly related but I want to see more trans relationships in stories. Especially t4t ones. And I want to see antihero trans characters with dynamic character arcs or something idk I want all kinds of trans characters.
In nonbinary and considering T. Cost and career are still issues, but my bf has been supportive. We don't know if my hormones changing will affect his physical attraction to me and obviously he can't control that. Though he does say I look cute in a (costume) beard. I think the thing that matters most to me is that he'll love me either way, even if that love is expressed in different ways.
i really like this reddit you could bring it about more often, im kind of in the beginning of my transition so im desperate for any crumble of hope to be fair
Honestly, you and your spouse are so lovely. You'd make amazing parents. You should look into adopting or fostering 🥰🥰 there are other ways too of course.
for context with the pregnancy one PPD=Post Partum Depression, PPA = Post Partum Anxiety, 2 super common things with new moms :3
Maca-RON is the French cookie sandwich thing; maca-ROON is the coconut mound thing.
This video is so wholesome and heartwarming ❤
As a trans woman i tried Cis
girls and Cis men
and just to be clear all of them were wonderful loving good humans.
But i always felt something was missing , now my gf is a trans woman and everything seems to be so easy now .
My partner and I are both genderfluid and we do pronoun check ins almost every morning
8:30
Jamie here completely overlooking the (very, extremely real) possibility that the trans girlfriend is just terrified of social transition, and that she might really benefit from finding a safe space to begin socially transitionning to a few people at once.
I understand that it's OK to not want to do e.g. hair removal, make-up, etc. But the fact of the matter is : a majority of trans women want to do at least some amount of social transition, and they want to present as (stereotypically) feminine in at least some way. It's far more likely that the trans girlfriend here is afraid to begin social transition outside of her home. I see this type of stuff in the MtF community all the time. People start taking hormones but they hope that that'll be enough to get them to "male-fail" and they just wait around for the hormones to magically turn them into girls, but most times it just doesn't really happen, and they end up getting stared at.
You need a safe space, a community where you can experiment and gain confidence. Social transition proceeds like a snowball : you start small, and gradually build it outwards, using the confidence from the previous round of comings-out to bolster you and push you on to the next one. It's a scary process but you have to start it at some point. From what the post says, I don't think the trans girlfriend is just fully comfortable in her transition. I don't think it's that she doesn't /want/ any of that stuff. But she needs to find the courage to start, and the community that'll support her with that.
My trans gf and i fell in love accidentally when we started spending a lot of time together as friends. She started out very nervous about herself, even though she'd been on hormones for a couple years. 4 months in, being loved and validated by a partner has given her a new confidence, helped her actually like herself in a way she didn't know she could, and watching her blossom has been an incredible privilege. I cant wait to see how much more she'll grow into herself over the years, because im already so impressed by her progress ❤
Omg I really feel the thing of feeling like you'll never find someone who loves you in the same way you love them. I'm thinking about the posibility of getting top surgery in the future and, since I probably won't be on hormones, I feel like I'm going to exist as an in between form that most people won't be attracted to, even though it's what I think would make me the happiest
normalize not passing.
Agreeeeeeed
Heck yeah!
These stories were so lovely that I, although quite content with my very single life, noticed I was thinking about how fun it would be to go on a date with my wife. 😂
We need more videos with such cute stories, please 😭😭
I am non-binary and I have dated Trans Women before who do not pass. The safety concerns are real. Honestly I would talk to my partner about my worries. You two may need to relocate to a more urban area.
my polycule is entirely trans and it’s amazing
I love happy Jamie.
Often I do not watch a video because I am having to shield myself from the anti trans* stuff you are reacting to, so I really enjoy when you make videos that have some good news in there.
Hope many US folks pre-order your book!
Looking forward to it's availability in Europe :D
💙💓🤍
PPD is postpartum depression. Horrible and sad thing for people after they give birth
I was looking for this comment, boosting this so more people see this
Also boosting
It's tragic
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I’m a cis guy but my girlfriend is trans, I wouldn’t have it any other way. To me, I sometimes even forget she’s trans, cis, whatever, cause it doesn’t matter to me. I love her and nothing will change that.
this is so pure and wholesome i love it. I have no way of knowing, but i think my partner is the same way and trust me, that feeling makes us so happy. she's lucky to have you
You are an amazing human, sir
Aw thanks guys :)
This is so nice ❤❤❤❤
@@Lord-Griff No, he have a girlfriend who happens to be trans. So his partner is a woman 😊
Married 18 years. I identified as a lesbian and my spouse transitioned after we got married - it was a bit hard at times but we walked together and are stronger than ever. We are partners in every way - each of us taking on tasks that we are good at. He is great at the laundry while I excel at fixing things. We say f*ck gender roles and his motto is "Masculinity is what you make it". (Although it took him a long time to get there). Meanwhile he has a full beard that makes his cis brothers jealous, and I have a husband that is empathetic and understanding for female issues :) support, patience, and lots and lots of talking
That sounds incredibly wholesome, I'm happy for you both! Please let me know if I'm overstepping, but how did you cope with this at the time, considering you identified as a lesbian? Were you attracted to him after his transition?
@luchirimoya it was a conscious choice to stay. In any relationship your partner will change as they age and grow. It wasn't easy, I won't lie, and we almost didn't make it for a while. But in any marriage you wake up and choose every day to love your partner. Mine changed a bit more than expected, but over the years I have changed too. I still see the eyes of the person I fell in love with all those years ago, behind wrinkles/ grey hairs / and an unexpected beard.
Best possible outcome.
Respect. Love takes work, but it's pretty darn great.
@@alexisjean6191 "Wrinkles, grey hairs and an unexpected beard" 😂
I will be forever grateful for my family who, when my partner came out as trans, said they love her like a daughter(she's mtf) and that she treats me better than any of my ex's have. We're getting married next year ❤ ☺️
Congrats!
aww ❤
Your family cares that you are happy. Having the experience of a truly loving family, makes it easier for people to recognize healthy relationships, and to find a truly loving partner. I’m happy for you!
Your family sounds amazing
congrats!💗
My partner came out to me as trans after we'd been dating for about a year, and about half a year later I came out to them as being nonbinary - helping her express her true self helped me feel comfortable expressing mine. We both had our genders changed on our birth certificates, and when name changes happened we both changed our last names to the same name.
aww
Married via 'inspect element'
@@gone_mad-tryagainlater that’s hilarious I love it
Lmao so weak and pathetic.
Omg congratulations to you both, what a beautiful fkn chain of events 🥺✨
I’ve just recently started dating a trans woman, and so far, the only adjustment I’ve had to make is that as a cis lesbian in my late 30s who’s never had to worry about birth control before, I had to figure it all out later in life compared to other cis women. Luckily, I have a very supportive family doctor who helped me navigate the whole thing, even reaching out to a compassionate care charity for my birth control of choice when my insurance didn’t cover it.
My girlfriend is so lovely, and I’m so happy to have her in my life!
@@chrisbfreelanceAre all men who like pegging bisexual? No.
Are lesbians who enjoy sex with strap-ons all bisexual? No.
If she's a lesbian, she only likes women. Girl dick is still *girl.*
Some people discover they are bisexual later in life, but that doesn't seem to be the case here. If she says she's a lesbian, she's a lesbian.
@@chrisbfreelance because she's not? she's a lesbian.
@@chrisbfreelance or a trans woman apparently. can't you read? it's said quite explicitly in the original comment. i don't understand why you're confused.
@@ldekker97 I don't think their confused pretty sure they just don't consider trans women "real women" sadly
@chrisbfreelance Because I'm not. I'm a lesbian, and am only attracted to women. This includes trans women.
I'm not attracted to men, including trans men. In fact, I've had the opportunity to sleep with men who I've found aesthetically attractive, but my libido very clearly went "nope, that's a dude".
When I'm with my girlfriend, my libido goes "Pretty lady! 😍"
Hope that helps.
Hello, person reading the comments! Did you know you are amazing? I am so proud of you! Whatever is going on in your life, remember, you've got this! You are so much stronger than you think! 🦕🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🦖
Thanks, I needed to read that. You as well, friend
The Dinosaurs make this comment special
As a trans dinosaur nerd i love the emojis here, thank you very much! You must be an amazing person as well ^^
You too friend
U too ❤
My bf has been here for me when I was a girl and continued to be here for me through my gender confusion and realising I'm nb. He called me handsome and his bf recently, it feels so nice.
I'm so glad to read this ! Stories are always about wife supporting their transitioning spouses but never about a man supporting a ftm transition. i was really in need of reading this.
The day of my 1 year anniversary of coming out trans, my partner and I had gone to the zoo with friends of ours. I'd still been nervous about passing back then, especially since I hadn't been on HRT for very long. We ran into some coworkers of my partner and every time they would, without hesitation, introduce me as their girlfriend. Absolutely one of the best feelings of my life, and I can't wait till girlfriend, becomes wife.
aww ❤
Hopefully you won't decide to Detransition one day because that's really gonna suck for ya
@rcdune7132 that's never happening, thank you for your concern. I waited 33 years to be who I was always supposed to be, I'm not about to go back to that unhappy creature
I don't know if you'll see this Jamie, but I used to show your videos to my dad over 5 years ago to help him become more accepting. It slowly but surely worked and now YEARS later hes a fully fledged ally! On a much sweeter side note your videos opened up a whole world for me, helped me realize being a trans man was an option and even led to my mom asking if I was trans a week after I came out to some friends (dw it was a nice story). I have so many great memories of sitting in our living room and watching your videos with my mom. She sadly passed away this year but she loved your content and was the best mom any queer kid could've asked for (though I am a grown adult now and have been for awhile). Thank you for just being you and making all of the wonderful, and positive content you make! You have surely changed many lives for the better!
So sorry for your loss 💜
❤
Congratulations for you and your dad,
But my condolences for your mother.
Upvoting, so he'll read it! It's such a happy story! Apart from your mom passing. Sorry for your loss!
So sorry for your loss. May her love follow you everywhere you go. I’m so glad she got to truly see you before she passed :’’’)
Also awesome to hear your dad’s come around and that you have good friends and all. Much love to you!
I'm an amab person and two years ago I started doubting my gender and identifying as non binary using all pronouns but in fact i never had the confidence to use different pronouns than he/him even if when my partner occasionally used she/her i would melt in joy. This summer i realised i am in fact a girl and, even if we broke up (we are still good friends), i felt the necessity to text them to say thanks for being supportive and helping me in my self discovery when even I wasn't able
uh
this is so sweet to hear. im so glad that you found yourself and that you have such a wonderful friend in your life ♡
@@ArbitraryCodeExecution what a great contribution to this conversation you have made
@@nameofthename sorry i just happen to relate so much to some parts of OP's comment, was kinda shocking
@@ArbitraryCodeExecution I send you a virtual hug
As a trans boy, I can say that I actually find that T4T relationships are what's best for me, because my partner understands what I'm going through and we can help each other. Anyone can relate?
Personally, I relate. I've been with alot of cisgender people and when I started dating trans/nonbinary people like myself, I felt alot more comfortable
@@rcdune7132why are you asking? Lol
I agree. I can't say I'm never going to date a cis person, but I'm not seeking them out at all.
@@cranberrycracker6847 Yeah, me too ^^
@@ItsAllNunya Feel that
My fiancé and I met believing we were a pair of cis lesbian girls. Took us about four years before I realized I wasn’t and spent years questioning and figuring out my gender (non-binary, potentially some gender fluidity), and he took some time to think on himself after I came out, and came to realize he’s a very lovely trans man! 7 years into our relationship and we’re happier than ever.
That is so sweet. Best wishes to you both.
:)