I think its kind of like if youre an old soul, it also implies youve seen it all before a million times. That, in turn, is cause for comedic mischief cause its like "Ah this again, lets spice things up a little cause Ive seen it a 1000 times already and its getting boring".
They seem to be one in the same to me. Keeping a sense of youthful wonder about the world, and finding inspiration in the world's beauty, is a wise and mature thing to do. It seems like a fulfilling way to go about life. Or rather, to view life.
as an ENFP sometimes I say something weird to get a rise out of people to see how they react because judging a person by the way they react is more accurate than judging a person based on how they act
Very true, for comparison, when we want to find out how someone should snowboard, we push them and see what foot they put out first! In this case you give them the psychological push, and see which cognitive function arises first ;p
you can feel like fiting everywhere and no where at the same time and, it has been this way for me my entire life, almost as if infinity was as big as an atom, always traveling just to find that i never left
The fucked up thing what gets me is being so open to everyone's perspective and accepting who they are that it's almost like introspective schizophrenia and you struggle to understand yourself.
Happy Espinosa Will look you up later ... Maybe in 2021 ... Or 2022 ... Or when I'm done thinking about stuff and making plans and rethinking everything over and over again. LOL!
As an enfp I found everything you said here Nathan is spot on! Especially this line: "the world can fluctuate from seeming like an infinite playground on one day to feeling extremely restrictive and disappointing the next." Which is fucking tiring. Any advice on this?
Yeah, I agree!! And that one resonated a lot too.. Well, what I try to do lately is to remind myself that it's most of all a feeling and thus will pass, my ideals and their potential is still there even on days when I feel utterly disappointed and grim. Anyway, it's so cool to see other ENFPs talk about their nature, it feels much less lonely, having this "condition" lol. Cheers!
I do wonder whether it's something that can be overcome, one of the things personality type tends to illuminate is that there are inevitable highs and lows each type will experience. In some ways, by trying to balance those things out you lose a lot of the highs, so it's a tricky thing to ponder - whether you should even try to change it!? ~ Nathan
Same with me. It's kinda sad tbh. But let's just keep going, as we grow older and learn more, I believe we will find ways to handle these stuff better.
The best coping mechanism I've found for this is believing in yourself, that you yourself are the playground of possibilities, then when you wake up and reality has hit in the world around you the permanence is your confidence in your own ability and your positive effect on the world around you even in dark times - hope this helps x
Why do we always have a million tabs open you guys 😆😆?!?! Also I love strangers too hahaha!!! My ESTP brother does not like that fact hahaha. ESTP: “Did you just give those random a** people your real email address?!” ENFP: “Yup!!😄” ESTP: “they might ACTUALLY email you...” ENFP: “I hope so!!!” ESTP: “🙄😪what if they’re sickos and harass you?” ENFP: “.....😶😦” ESTP: “don’t call me when they start asking you for money or something...”
I’m an ENFP and recently my boyfriend said, “I think I get it. You don’t experience people inside Starbucks as any different than people inside a psychiatric ward”. I felt very understood then, and loved it.
@@youreworthyourweightinavoc7189 My clan, i love that! hahah, yes i guess that's true but like you said we cannot know if all the enfps know the limits and boundaries of the people they know as we cannot know and therefore say every enfp is clingy
A walking paradox indeed. Whenever someone does something upsetting to me, the intial reaction of getting angry takes over me but after a few moments i would instantly see it from his or her perspective why they did that to me. Because ENFPs let others be themselves and we try to look at it from their point of view. I will understand where they are coming from at the same time i question whether i am gaslighting myself to think i am overreacting or something. Idk if it makes sense but there are always these internal eternal contradictions happening constantly, and it's debilitating sometimes.
Oh wow this is something I’m really struggling with at the moment. Do you have any advice? I want to still acknowledge my feelings but I also don’t want to push back on anyone without understanding their point of view, because maybe there’s something I don’t quite understand. And recently I’ve been finding that this has been causing me to not really share it at all, and then I feel like I’m being dishonest or not myself for not saying anything. But also I want to understand their point of view and I feel like that’s also a part of who I am and so just how to I harmonise those two parts of myself which are both so real? Sorry I went of on a tangent 😅 have you learnt any techniques yourself in this yet?
@@gracebrown3074 when i commented on this i was really in a dark place. I was an in denial people pleaser and that implies not drawing clear boundaries between the people i care for. one thing i have learn is to be comfortable with the discomfort of not pleasing other people. I think the reason why we struggle, is that we don't like the discomfort that upset people makes us feel. I am still struggling with this but i am better now at accepting that i can't make everyone happy at the expense of my own happiness. And i think having clear boundaries helped a lot with my journey. It was very difficult for me to stop pleasing my dad but he was causing me too much pain. When i pulled away from him, and as painful as it is watching him cry, i stood my ground and became my own person. I am happier now and i think our relationship is more matured than before. haha now i went off tangent. I hope you're doing well :)
I agree with that whole dark side thing. I'm an ENFP and as positive and idealistic as I am, I can't help but have those bouts of passionless unrest where I just want everything to burn. Sometimes life is just exhausting
Yes I feel exactly the same too! I can get soooo pushing, controlling and obsessed about something because I fucking know that I want it and I also know that I am the creator of my reality. Sooooo stressfull. And then I get depressed because I don't already have what I want and this ends in me looking at my phone to distract me from the pain I feel.
Me walking up to a group of very scary biker gang looking guys at a bar: “Hi! I like yalls motorcycles! How exactly does one join a biker club? Is it fun?”
There’s definitely a high that we get from crossing “social” boundaries... I love meeting people from different walks of life than my own, and there’s special satisfaction in it when they’re people who the greater population has deemed as “undesirable”. I think one of the driving forces of the ENFP is revealing the humanity in every human being.
The “Eternal youth yet old souls” hit me so hard I’m an Enfp and I’ve never been able to quite put my finger on how to explain my mental age because I feel so young and so old at the same time, I’ve always felt more morally wiser than my peers yet I feel like I look at different things from a younger perspective, idk if it sounds weird but that really hit close to home
That’s strange duality between feeling old and young simultaneously is definitely something I’ve noticed from ENFPs. It’s always cool to see people resonating with the descriptions from the videos! ~ Nathan
Had the privilege of being raised by an ENFP and then had the further privilege of marrying one. Something I've noticed with my mom, my husband and other ENFP friends is that they are incredibly socially resilient. When people correct them they take it in stride (and boy is that ever hard to do when the other person doing the correcting is actually in the wrong). Who knows how many wars the world has avoided due to the graciousness of ENFPs! Thank you ENFPs for being wonderful, weird and wise. Also, I know you ENFPs try to hide your tears, but a dear INFJ friend once told me that tears are an important part of us because tears show what matter to us. And seeing how much something matters to you, isn't that something worth seeing? If tears show the real you, aren't you someone worth seeing? Let the tears flow, they don't flow unless something is wrong, much like our bodies don't bleed unless something is wrong. Tears are the blood of our emotions. Be sure to make friends who will see you bleeding and care. Lots of love. ❤
I just being attacked by a close friend for a mistake I didn't make and your writing makes me cry here. Thank you so much 🙏🏼. She apologized to me again after his bf scolded her for treating me like that when everything was just a misunderstanding, saying that if it was someone else getting attacked instead of me, the friendship would've gone for good. I'm trying to brush it off right now because it hurts so much, all the words she said to me in the spit of the emotions. I just hope nothing like this would ever happen again in my life. Because I'm losing hope with friendship right now.
I feel that the dark side is a wondering for why the hell we are here, what the hell we are doing, and why are so many people destroying the planet and hating each other and making life terribly difficult.
I’m (ISFP) lucky to be married to an ENFP. She’s an incredible human with the most weird stories and interactions you could ever ask for. That Ne/Fi combo is just spectacular when it comes to the creation of storytelling, wit, and recollection of memories. You are right about the darkness, btw. For someone so happy on the outside, there’s a sadness within that they can’t keep up or meet the ideals they hold in their head and heart. If you don’t know an ENFP, find one!!!
As an ENFP I agree so much with the term"Walking Paradox". It applies to many aspects and layers of our personality. Aside your example, there's the thing with us constantly contradicting and doubting ourselves along every step of our way, despite the amount of effort we might put in to encourage other people showing their true personalities. Strangely, a lot of stuff we do for others often doesn't apply to us in our heads. Another one is one of our biggest fears being loneliness, yet, we still often isolate ourselves when our "dark side" comes to surface (this thing is also paradoxical, ofc). To mention a somewhat silly example of the contradictory nature of ENFPs regarding my life: I like to send short video messages to the people around me, and when I rewatch them, I often observe myself insantly contradicting and doubting every statement that leaves my mouth, sometimes multiple times just in one sentence (which makes me sound so ridiculous). I'm sorry if this writing wasn't very clear, I have a messy train of thought and English is not my first lang :P
My sister is an ENFP and she is definitely disillusioned with the world. Her mantra is pretty much 'people suck' and as an INFP, I largely agree with her.
Always nice to have a little representation from some non-ENFPs. As an ENFP, I genuinely appreciate being *seen* , you know? Great videos as always, man!
Thank you very much, it's really nice to do videos on different types (ones that don't always get big views) and have people of that type enjoy it! ~ Nathan
Possible ENFP-type quote: "See, you don't have to think about doing the right thing. If you're for the right thing, then you do it without thinking." - Maya Angelou (who may or may not have been ENFP) Love the ENFP's instincts for good will!
I'm really in awe of an ENFP friend of mine and the way he not only moves with ease through chaos but uses it to fuel his creativity. I mean, I love an intellectual problem to solve, but what most would consider unbearable, unreasonable situations are his breakfast, lunch and dinner! Though, too, there is certainly that sadness you pointed out... but he's still so much BETTER at handling it and using it to churn out still more art and prose. It's enough to make a person jealous of that kind of mental poise.
The first sentence of this comment brilliantly describes both ENFPs and ENTPs and equally describes my shock and awe at how well they can navigate through and ride the wave of chaos ~ Nathan
@@lovewho thank you, enfp here. Great video Nathan. How we process so fast at once is pure chaos. It's natural code for us. Doesn't stress us, we're usually 5-10 steps ahead of everyone and have already evaluated the outcome. Namaste ❤️, and again, thank you
In chaos is truly where we thrive most... but the flip-side of that is that whenever we need to do anything practical or that requires patience we are at such a loss haha. Everyone has their own virtues!
Damn when you said it like that, i seem to notice when everyone else is panicking im the only dude thats like relaxed lmao, i work surprisingly well under pressure
This fluctuation between light and darkness in relation to the ongoing tension between reality vs. fantasy/idealism sums up my brain perfectly! You got ENFPs right!
You're SO lucky to have an ENFP mum, as will be my children inchalah ahahah, but i keep wondering what are the predefined shortcomings I will have as an ENFP mum..
Out of all the descriptions of ENFPs I've heard, this one describes me the most accurately. I'm basically a Care Bear with a horrifying sense of humor.
I'm 41, and have been exploring my ENFPness for years now. Idealism and being constantly open to everything because everything is interesting and amazing also lets in the not so wonderful. Suffering of others is something that brings me to the dark, as well as destruction of nature. I can't help but feel as though I am connected to everything and mourn with some, celebrate with others.
Yes to feeling connected. And also cultivating that feeling in ourselves and wishing others felt more connected (because then maybe there would be more motivation to be kind to others and invested in the well-being of other people and our planet).
Hey, I'm also a 41-year old ENFP and can very, very much relate to what you wrote - to the extent where I could have written it myself. I've become somewhat of a climate activists in the past two years, but constantly have had to find ways to deal with the destruction happening on this planet, so the knowledge doesn't absolutely destroy me. It's an almost overwhelming grief I feel sometimes. Sending warm hugs from Berlin!
@@DerKommendePark Hey I can feel that so much!! I'm also an ENFP (and even though I'm 17) I totally agree. I've become vegan half a year ago and since then I've been diving deeper and deeper into climate-justice-activism-stuff. Seems like us ENFPs are pretty concerned with the harm being caused to people, animals and the whole environment. As you're from Germany, too, you've probably heard about the deforestation of the "Dannenröder Forst"😓🌲. I'm very close to join the rebellion there during the Christmas holidays... Lots of love🥰💚
@@June-hd8xv Oh wow, yes I made a poster to support the activists in Danni! A lot of people I know have been there or are going this week - everyone's really shocked about the police violence, please take care if you do go. I also made a calendar for 2021 that I'm giving to activists in Danni to say thank you, please let me know if you want one, and I'll send it to you in the post - you can contact me via pm on instagram, if you like! This is me: instagram.com/illustration_by_emily/ What a coincidence to meet you in the comments of a random youtube video!!
As an infp, I love enfp because I can be myself and not feel drained by being around them. They believe in you and your dreams. Most of my friends are enfp because they don't mind my disappearing act ... they are very understanding... My sis is enfp too but we fight alot (which is weird because I never fight with my enfp friends)
@@mefloquine lol it's minor stuff.. sibling stuff... like she ignores me while I'm busy pouring my feelings or telling her stores.. she thinks I'm boring. I hate being ignored. My intp brother tells me when his stop listening to me which I prefer. She doesn't. She doesn't like doing chores. I end up doing most of it.. at least she cooks so we don't fight about this as much... And she used to think I was dad's favorite, while I thought she was moms... We fight and five min later we laughing and talking.. my brother is the mediator most of the time... It's better now.. now that we are all on our 20s
“Bridge between people or groups that would otherwise never interact.” “They can always find a part of themselves that relates to, or resonates with, a person.” Really moved by those observation in particular!! I relate to feeling like I can talk with/connect with most people and hope that, that skill can develop into building bridges as I develop!! Especially in this day and age. Also, I liked the point about lightness and darkness. I think, like you said, the darkness is born when, as we’re growing up, we encounter the harshness and darkness of the real world and our idealistic view of things is ruined. But then we can accept the truth of the darkness and marvel at the little kindnesses and moments of light and joy that exist despite the harsh realities. We realize that a lot of people are selfish and unkind (and that we, ourselves, are capable of meanness and selfishness)-so when someone takes the time to say a kind word to others, or hold the door as we’re running into work, or smile at a stranger, it feels even more meaningful. It’s like, well things are awful...but at least there are people out there trying to be good and trying to have a positive presence in the world, and I want to be one of the good ones.
Yeah this is so true. Even though I'm deeply idealistic, I'm very aware of reality which confuses a lot of people because they will usually have an idea which gets crushed by reality, whereas I will always try to see how to adapt things better. It's not always easy but there's always a possibility where things work out for the better. Thanks for the video!
ENFP here! I really appreciate you acknowledging our dark side ... I would put it exactly as you described it: our idealism is fatalistically disappointing in light of reality and it's very painful to constantly have that bubble burst and have to pick yourself up again, only to get your bubble burst and have to do the whole thing over again.
As an enfp it's very real... where I always want to turn sad moments into fun ones, you could even say that in all situations I'm more tolerant because I don't want to ruin the atmosphere or even make the relationship awkward. Even the branding I get is a person with all the fun, I can make jokes about everything and try to support people who are not good. if they don't know me well, they will be jealous because they think I don't have any problems in life and ask me for tips. There are also some of them who think serious conversations are not suitable to talk to me about. but when I want to become closer and truly be friends with that person, I will immediately provoke him to trust and be more open so that at that point I show that this is me who can actually be friends with in any condition, be it casual, joking or even serious.
This video was great. The dark side of the ENFP can definitely be interesting, and it happens like a switch, honestly. Everything is great one minute and within a second, it starts to seem awful. It can go on for hours, but usually abates. I've had it, and it sucks. For those in which it doesn't abate, though, and persists for days, weeks, years, it can get very interesting. Probably the best example of a restless ENFP with a cause is Che Guevara, as he took his personal view of injustice and fought for it in relentless ways. That's definitely an outlier, though, and so hard to imagine 99.9999999% of ENFPs from ever doing that, due to our love for people.
ENFP’s see the simultaneous beauty and sadness in everything. They also feel it. There’s a cycle of hope and despair for humanity and really all life on earth. We are deep and passionate to the point which it can be overwhelming. 🌎💔
Honestly as an ENFP this was very refreshing to watch. Enfps get stereotyped with so often (which we’re fine with because it entertains people) but we have very introspective and philosophical thoughts too. It’s super true what was described in this video: seeing the world as a playground one day, and seeing it as restricting and hopeless the next. I also liked what you said about enjoying being the bridge between people who would normally never connect. And the spontaneous fun way of life!! This was so great thank you :,)
As an ENFP, I find myself having goosebumps after watching your video. It's just really heartwarming but in a weird way that I can't even put my finger on. Especially the part when you said "The genius of an ENFP, is to give people permission to be themselves," it's just somehow so true even I don't know what to say anymore.
I do feel that duality in my self. Its like one day I feel happy and gretful for pepole and nature, the other day I feel disgust at how horrible we are towards her and each other.
What you said about an ENFP being the most paradoxical type I relate to a bunch. I had a friend who saw me as innocent and child-like. Then, one day I cracked a dark, perverted joke, and she just couldn't comprehend how someone could be so light and playful one second, then crude and dark the next.
I'm 45 seconds into watching this and I think I'm gonna cry. I just recently found out my personality type and feeling understood and understanding myself has been so liberating.
i'm an infp and my best friend of 10 years is an enfp. there's never a dull moment around her; she loves telling stories, which i appreciate because i can just listen and let her lead the conversation. she's super bubbly most of the time, but there are also times where our conversations take a deep or dark turn and it surprises me.
I’m an enfp and honestly he got almost everything right, we’re very in the middle people, not in the sense that we can’t make up our minds, or we’re very natural, enfps are very positive people and mainly want the best for the people around them, what I’m saying is we are the true ambivert, always on the cusp of mental breakdown and laughing, normally we let the positive side win. Most of the time humor is our main coping mechanism and when things seem like their crumbling to pieces that’s what we jump for. We’re empathetic and good natured, even though we’re pretty chaotic. In the end enfps will almost always find the good in people and sympathize with their emotions and struggles. We put others before ourselves, because we just in general love people.
Exactly. The biggest pain is not from what went wrong, as that could still be somehow forgiven and turned to good, but for what could have happened and never did. Missed and wasted potential. Acceptance of gloomy reality. When the world of possibilities turns into a reality of restrictions, rountines, powerlessness and repeatedness of poor choices of massed...when ability to bring change seems too far away. That's a dark place to be in ones ❤️....never ending fight for hope to stand up and continue believing in the impossible...and giving all you have to make it happen...or at least more real to others.
Same here, also an ENTP but this relates to me a LOT. I'm always trying to relate with everyone, purely because it makes socialising more fun. I think that might be our tertiary Fe function at work there.
@@ZacharyT94 you’re probably right! I also feel like it’s more my Ne at work though, easily finding connections between interests/viewpoints/etc that makes it easy to finding smth to relate to anyone. And when I can’t, the insatiable desire to add one more way to see the world to my mind web of interconnected ideas compels me to get to know them anyway
That makes a lot of sense, ENFPs and ENTPs overlap in many ways so many of the points in the ENFP videos on here will resonate with ENTPs as well ~ Nathan
Oh my gosh this is so me!! I am an ENFP. My major in college is international studies. I am learning 3 languages right now. All of my best friends have been outsiders who I have talked to. I have struggled so much with depression, as well as other mental disorders, especially when I feel disappointed in life. I even tried to commit suicide.
Totally agree with this! Us ENFPs can often be seen as naive too due to our playful and lively attitude. In reality, we know much more than people can imagine!
As an ENTP, I can also relate to a lot of this, and definitely think that what you said about the dark side and childish humour is an Ne think predominantly
we are so wise and from all our hardships that we know the only way to stay true to ourselves is to never let go of that child spark its where all of our creativity and empathy come from we are very emotionally mature but only after have a moment of emotional immaturity
So much I could say... Walking paradox for sure! Except that I'm often sitting... watching UA-cam to explore the world of ideas and feed my Ne. Quirky humor? Check. The bad puns and random connections for comedic sake just happen to me! It's not like I make the stuff up. Those just pop into my brain and I have to let them out. The world IS a playground some days and others I struggle... mainly because I still haven't followed through on all the things that I dream about. Weird how endless possibilities can be limiting in the sense that in order to succeed in this life you have to narrow your focus and stay in that lane over time. The struggle is real! Still, I manage to make unfocused work somehow. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself. Something ENFPs are... I know I am. Self critical is a thing while also being supremely confident at times. I can give pretty much everyone a pass and see things from their perspective which brings understanding and compassion. But. I can be pretty hard on myself for the smallest blunders. (and the big ones too) Also, I use too many exclamation points! and the three dot thing... so there's that :-) Back to bouncing off the walls and hopefully making people laugh! Maybe I'll write another parody song today. Maybe. Thanx for your insightfulness!
Very true, as an ENFP I need to experience and embrace the darker lessons in life, in order to grow towards a greater light. There is no color without light and no light without darkness, there is only dull grey.
My friend from middle school, who I believe to be an ESFP, and who I reunited with in-person recently, said that about me - that I'm unconditionally accepting and always giving the people that nobody else bothers with, chances. It was nice to hear, because that's what I want to do, I don't want anyone to feel rejected and excluded like me. And also... I see nothing wrong with them. "Weird" individual differences aren't bad. Of course, I need to learn to be more careful sometimes... but I wouldn't give it up ever. I guess it also naturally comes with high/dom Ne, seeing different angles of a situation easily and not letting anything be understood one-dimensionally.
An ENFP friend of mine is dedicated to humor and writing, and she is brilliant and underappreciated. She is a "brainiac" who embraced all kinds of oddballs and eventually achieved her biggest dream, which was to get remarried, this time to a man who truly loved her.
Thank you! That video was amazing! I find that a strenght ENFPs have is being able to understand people below the surface. Insted of just taking information as it is presented, we ask « why », « what do you mean by(...) » or « how does that affect you ». What i like to discover is what the person is not saying, because, sometimes, what someone really wants to express is what they are not saying. I find that it’s a usefull skill to help others to understand themeselves and help them put words on thoughts they could not clarify. I simply love to hear people talking about themeselves 😊
That quote definitely resonates with people on many levels but nonetheless it did feel right for this video. I agree that having ENFPs in your inner circle is excellent, they inject a lot of fun into your life whilst being able to keep up with pretty much anyone in a crazy variety of topics ~ Nathan
this really made me feel better about myself!! people around me always tell me that i’m embarrassing or weird which was very confusing, still is! i don’t understand what’s bothering them, i’m really glad that i found people out there that i can actually relate to! thank you for your kind words sir :D -enfp
I get the 'you're weird' thing...a lot. But only from people who don't know me well enough. My thought process is so different from that of the majority of people I know, I have had to learn that originality is not welcomed by everyone....
Namaste ❤️ everyone! I am humbled by everyone's extremely moving and inspiring comments. I'm 62yo 13yo at heart enfp 425 equally empath. We do give freely without expecting anything back. We will move mountains for strangers. When we hear such kindness, compassion, love back. It replenishes our humble spirit. Namaste ❤️
It’s weird bc I’m incredibly talkative and social around people but I am definitely geeky, I feel like I come off as someone who doesn’t really like school or “nerdy stuff” but Ill find my self getting excited about geeky things and school. The line that said that enfos come off as youthful and energetic but have an old soul really speaks to me
Wow, I'm not an ENFP, but this is definitely one of my favourite videos from your channel. I loved your perspective about them, and your analysis is very... accurate, yet it is something that you don't hear very often about this personality Thanks for sharing your thoughts:) Love the fact that they're original and make sense
This is great to hear, I often wonder which people of which type watch the videos other than the type in the title of the video. Also getting praise from ENTJs is always a rare treat ~ Nathan
As an ENFP, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing all the way through this! Because this is the most spot-ON description ever said about our internal and external world. There’s often a stereotype of us being impulsive, airheaded, irresponsible relentlessly optimistic cheerleaders, which couldn’t be further from the truth. We indulge that dark side-a LOT, lol. We are Hallmark and macabre murder documentaries in the same breath. Idealistic yet bitter. Extroverted yet loners. Want affection but not too much. We live in the land of multi-tiered paradox but it makes perfect sense to us. Anything less complex is far too dull. 🤣
I agree about the bipolar outlook effect - I think it can also have something to do with out intimate relationships, though, not just seeing the big picture potential/reality of the world. When we accept people as they are, we open ourselves up to enjoying the good things about them, but also their dark and hurtful sides. It's like I don't fight their darkness by default - I have to absorb it first. That can be really sad and heartbreaking, even if the person is not aiming their darkness at me. A solution or path of growth may or may not come later.
As an ENFP, I do agree with us letting others be themselves and sometimes ending up with the "weird" ppl. I mean, I can surely chat with just anyone very easily, but what I love the most is getting to know ppl for what they really are -- all they like, do, don't like and all their dreams and even traumas, I love to know every person as if they were the closest person to me [although, of course, to a lot of people that also looks like intrusive or too intense or strange, haha], but it's true. And when I look at the past and my present, I see it. I've always made friends with the "weird" guys or ppl who talked less or had less friends in a class or anywhere, and I'd do my best to make them feel at home when they talk to me or spend time with me. I know ppl who are afraid or tired of trying to make new friends, of traying to meet just anyone, but I do really love them -- every person /is/ a whole world and a whole galaxy, and that always amazes me. I'm currently working at a small store, and I get to have brief chats with random or regular clients every now and then, and I love when they tell me what they like or feel or think or just anything about their lives, it's just amazing.
1:03 Me an enfp who made a “weirdos club” that anyone could join but mostly for the outcasts and those who didnt have many friends back in 7th grade- 👀
this is so true!!!! the darkness balances the light and vice versa--i am so grateful for my sense of humor--it has added sweetness to tragedy, it has built bridges where none seemed possible, it has spoken boundaries with tenderness and strength. and i don't think i would have it so strongly, or use it so boldly, if it were not for the darkness--for seeing it, feeling it, and being passionately agaisnt the "wrongdoing". thank you for speaking to this.
As an ENFP I totally agree with these, including the paradox between that playful positive side (youthful spirit) vs the dark side (old soul). I’ve been actually called out on both of these in my life.
My ENFP boyfriend is amazing! We discuss our dreams at night. He says he always has weird dreams. I say I never remember. He replies that I dont dream at night because I daydream too much.
I think you described the dark and the upbeat contradictory sides perfectly! For me, I know reality is broad and in the middle. But dramatized emotions might just feel like the colors of life that keep my momentum going. Also there just feels to be something boring about in the middle. :) idk
“A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world” As an ENFP with big dreams… chills.
Oh I loved this video!! So correct!! I'm an ENFP and well yeah I always want to make people happy and simply enjoy looking at others smiling and laughing And also about being lost...that's true as well... I mostly don't try to duel on it but it's the sheer truth and it sometimes just gets to you so bad... Also having a dark side... yeah... It's as if there are these two sides one is kind of tired of everything and everyone including myself and just the whole world and life itself!! the dark side... and the other is as bright, cheerful and carefree as a kid... and the kid mostly has the control... but of course the dark old friend is ALWAYS there... and can show up out of nowhere sometimes....like you suddenly feel so sad and out of energy, see no reason or whatsoever in life and the whole world crumbles under your feet.... You see so many possibilities a second and the next you're like "no...none of them are going to happen" and feel pretty disappointed and down Oh and about being very accepting... well yes I think everyone has the right to be understood by someone and be heard...not from others and whatever they think or/and say about that person but by the person herself/himself.... and well honestly I never thought I ACTUALLY understood many of my friends...I did to some levels but if they were after being understood, I don't think I could give it to them 100% (yeah the paradox side... confident but at the same time not really) but yeah I can relate to many things others may say.... Oh and I totally like getting close to those whom others may call weirdos and may not want to be friends with them...I totally feel like getting to know these kind of people and who they are... I mean... mostly people don't *see* these 'weirdos'... they misunderstand them without even trying to understand them...and I don't think that's fair... Oh...I feel like it got too long!! I might've not read it if I were you!! Hahaha And of course a true paradox ALL THE TIME!! (It may even be seen in what I typed just now!!)
Blending tragedy and comedy is definitely true. However as an ENFP I would argue against the "we're all doomed" thing, depending on the type. ENFPs can be sorted between spiritual and unspiritual. Spiritual ENFPs (like myself) will joke about dark humor but not assume all of us are without hope. "Unspiritual" ENFPs, I've found, are far more cynical and driven by an angry energy than an upbeat one.
As an ENFP, what resonated with me the most was the bridges between people that we make, at school I talk to so many different groups and I've got so many different friends from so many different walks of life. I don't know about other ENFP's but I love the quote from dickens "It was the best of times, It was the worst of times" and feel like I live like that a lot!
As an ENFP, I can definitely resonate with the aspect of having a dark side. Most people see me as a bright, upbeat creative dude who is always happy and making people laugh. However, while I do consider myself a happy person, I have a very dark side that only the people closest to me know about. Few would ever know that I am extremely hard on myself, and have a deep, brooding, philosophical side. I am very critical of my creative work (i.e. my music, art, design, creative writing, etc). Many people see my work and are amazed, but most don't realize how often I look at my work and tell myself it's not good enough. I think it's normal for most artists to be very self-critical, so I know I'm not saying anything out of the ordinary. I just don't think most 'normal' people see the dark side of us so called 'happy' artists. Many view Bob Ross as a 'happy' artist, while others see Van Gogh as a 'tortured soul,' yet I believe both of them had a dark side. Some artists just know how to hide it better than others.
I cried when you said that. we are individuals that see a len with many glasses. Not a lot of people understand this. In addition, I love it when my managers said to me "sam, you radiate a warmth and kind personality which impact everyone" I think that's why I am a successful teacher, I am flexible and although not perfect. I have the ability to inspire others to make themselves to be the best version of themselves.
Yes I'm a living paradox 😩 it's not easy all the time but at the same time I'm used to it and don't mind it at all. You described me perfectly in this whole video.
"youthful yet old souls" TRUE, it doesn't make sense and it makes sense. hard to explain to others
I think its kind of like if youre an old soul, it also implies youve seen it all before a million times. That, in turn, is cause for comedic mischief cause its like "Ah this again, lets spice things up a little cause Ive seen it a 1000 times already and its getting boring".
@@Stoffendous YES
Broooo for real
They seem to be one in the same to me. Keeping a sense of youthful wonder about the world, and finding inspiration in the world's beauty, is a wise and mature thing to do. It seems like a fulfilling way to go about life. Or rather, to view life.
I've described myself as someone with a young heart, an old soul, and the body of someone my age.
as an ENFP sometimes I say something weird to get a rise out of people to see how they react because judging a person by the way they react is more accurate than judging a person based on how they act
Interesting... (from an INTP)
Very very very relatable I do this on a daily basis
Very true, for comparison, when we want to find out how someone should snowboard, we push them and see what foot they put out first! In this case you give them the psychological push, and see which cognitive function arises first ;p
Agreed. I’m always looking to find the real person, not the projection.
@@colin7406 exactly!
Here to get a confidence boost XD
Lmfaooo yess
Well, I did "The Darkside of the ENFP" a while back so I figured it was time to do this video too! Hope you enjoyed it ~ Nathan
@@lovewho it was entertaining. Thanks.
We know that self affirmation cravings too well hahah
LMAO...same
“A walking paradox”, so accurate. You can feel like you fit in everywhere and nowhere simultaneously.
Hey there, ho there. ENFP here.
Same. Always part of the gang, never true member.
@@saramedic9609same
you can feel like fiting everywhere and no where at the same time and, it has been this way for me my entire life, almost as if infinity was as big as an atom, always traveling just to find that i never left
The fucked up thing what gets me is being so open to everyone's perspective and accepting who they are that it's almost like introspective schizophrenia and you struggle to understand yourself.
I get called 'crazy '
I used to be offended now I embrace it now I know the ENFP
ENFPs of the Internet, please adopt me. I'm a weird but wonderful INTJ.
my facebook is Kass Michaelis, i post about hunter x hunter in spanish but i speak english too HAHAHAHAHA
Happy Espinosa Will look you up later ... Maybe in 2021 ... Or 2022 ... Or when I'm done thinking about stuff and making plans and rethinking everything over and over again. LOL!
@@krdiaz8026 no problem ;))))
Weird is our favorite lbs
In the name of god i adopt you as my guardian. Congrats.
As an enfp I found everything you said here Nathan is spot on! Especially this line: "the world can fluctuate from seeming like an infinite playground on one day to feeling extremely restrictive and disappointing the next." Which is fucking tiring. Any advice on this?
Yeah, I agree!! And that one resonated a lot too.. Well, what I try to do lately is to remind myself that it's most of all a feeling and thus will pass, my ideals and their potential is still there even on days when I feel utterly disappointed and grim. Anyway, it's so cool to see other ENFPs talk about their nature, it feels much less lonely, having this "condition" lol. Cheers!
@@barostakuk1058 ENFP here to second Uk Ulele
I do wonder whether it's something that can be overcome, one of the things personality type tends to illuminate is that there are inevitable highs and lows each type will experience. In some ways, by trying to balance those things out you lose a lot of the highs, so it's a tricky thing to ponder - whether you should even try to change it!? ~ Nathan
Same with me. It's kinda sad tbh. But let's just keep going, as we grow older and learn more, I believe we will find ways to handle these stuff better.
The best coping mechanism I've found for this is believing in yourself, that you yourself are the playground of possibilities, then when you wake up and reality has hit in the world around you the permanence is your confidence in your own ability and your positive effect on the world around you even in dark times - hope this helps x
As an intp, I love enfps, they allow me to be myself, which I thought wasn't possible.
Hard agree. My little sister is one and she’s my favourite person in the world.
I love u 2 Mr. INTP ❤️keep working that big 'ol brain of yours
@@tessy4018 It must be great to have such a person in your family.
@@isleifurarnorsson2847 ❤️
Love you back😌👅
Me, an ENFP-T: A million tabs open, making friends with strangers and just overall chaotic in every aspect of life
My ENTJ boyfriend: *Eye twitch*
Perfection ~ Nathan
Why do we always have a million tabs open you guys 😆😆?!?!
Also I love strangers too hahaha!!! My ESTP brother does not like that fact hahaha. ESTP: “Did you just give those random a** people your real email address?!” ENFP: “Yup!!😄” ESTP: “they might ACTUALLY email you...” ENFP: “I hope so!!!” ESTP: “🙄😪what if they’re sickos and harass you?” ENFP: “.....😶😦” ESTP: “don’t call me when they start asking you for money or something...”
@@Luminous.A.Glory_VitaNostra talk about a mood killer... Lol!
Do you find your entj boyfriend to be controlling or dominating or possesive
Just curious, enfp here
My husband is an ISTJ. We are basically eachother's nightmares... the tab-thing drives him CRAZY!
I’m an ENFP and recently my boyfriend said, “I think I get it. You don’t experience people inside Starbucks as any different than people inside a psychiatric ward”.
I felt very understood then, and loved it.
Omg that's just the most beautiful thing ever. 😍
Just gave me chills. This is beautiful
Wait, do other people / types experience people at Starbucks differently than people in a psych ward? (ENFP here) I never considered that before…
As an ENFP that has been to the psych ward, I shall make it my mission to get to the nearest Starbucks as soon as possible to verify this statement 💪
I love ENFPs because they're very compassionate and loving without being clingy. And they just radiate a warmth and kind personality 💙
-INFJ
wha? They are soooo clingy. Soooooooooo cliiiiiinnnngy
@@youreworthyourweightinavoc7189 as an ENFP i stand with this hahah buut we do know the limits each person has and when to stop ;p
@@alexgamicor7309 I'm glad to hear that You do Alex, but I don't know that I can say the same for the entirety of your ENFP clan
@@youreworthyourweightinavoc7189 My clan, i love that! hahah, yes i guess that's true but like you said we cannot know if all the enfps know the limits and boundaries of the people they know as we cannot know and therefore say every enfp is clingy
@@alexgamicor7309 :)
A walking paradox indeed. Whenever someone does something upsetting to me, the intial reaction of getting angry takes over me but after a few moments i would instantly see it from his or her perspective why they did that to me. Because ENFPs let others be themselves and we try to look at it from their point of view. I will understand where they are coming from at the same time i question whether i am gaslighting myself to think i am overreacting or something. Idk if it makes sense but there are always these internal eternal contradictions happening constantly, and it's debilitating sometimes.
Oh wow this is something I’m really struggling with at the moment. Do you have any advice?
I want to still acknowledge my feelings but I also don’t want to push back on anyone without understanding their point of view, because maybe there’s something I don’t quite understand. And recently I’ve been finding that this has been causing me to not really share it at all, and then I feel like I’m being dishonest or not myself for not saying anything. But also I want to understand their point of view and I feel like that’s also a part of who I am and so just how to I harmonise those two parts of myself which are both so real? Sorry I went of on a tangent 😅 have you learnt any techniques yourself in this yet?
I swear our minds have it's own senate
@@gracebrown3074 when i commented on this i was really in a dark place. I was an in denial people pleaser and that implies not drawing clear boundaries between the people i care for. one thing i have learn is to be comfortable with the discomfort of not pleasing other people. I think the reason why we struggle, is that we don't like the discomfort that upset people makes us feel. I am still struggling with this but i am better now at accepting that i can't make everyone happy at the expense of my own happiness. And i think having clear boundaries helped a lot with my journey. It was very difficult for me to stop pleasing my dad but he was causing me too much pain. When i pulled away from him, and as painful as it is watching him cry, i stood my ground and became my own person. I am happier now and i think our relationship is more matured than before. haha now i went off tangent. I hope you're doing well :)
It makes perfect sense. I’m the exact same way. Happy to mow that I am not alone
woah this is so true
Hey Enfp's! You make the world a better place. Much love to you!
Amen ~ Nathan
U just made my day. Actually made my morning. Who knows what comes next.
wow, mah heart. 🥺✨
Awnn 🥺
Thankuuuu
I agree with that whole dark side thing. I'm an ENFP and as positive and idealistic as I am, I can't help but have those bouts of passionless unrest where I just want everything to burn. Sometimes life is just exhausting
Exactly
And that is okay. We just have to remember to reach out or hide back for a bit to find our way back into the beauty of this world. We can make it work
When you're at your highest, you fall the hardest
Yes I feel exactly the same too!
I can get soooo pushing, controlling and obsessed about something because I fucking know that I want it and I also know that I am the creator of my reality.
Sooooo stressfull. And then I get depressed because I don't already have what I want and this ends in me looking at my phone to distract me from the pain I feel.
@@fensynency me rn!
Me walking up to a group of very scary biker gang looking guys at a bar: “Hi! I like yalls motorcycles! How exactly does one join a biker club? Is it fun?”
Haha! This should be a scene in a movie ~ Nathan
Yees ! Like sometimes i'm surprised by how easy it can be to start a conversation with a total stranger ! At least on my high energy days
There’s definitely a high that we get from crossing “social” boundaries... I love meeting people from different walks of life than my own, and there’s special satisfaction in it when they’re people who the greater population has deemed as “undesirable”. I think one of the driving forces of the ENFP is revealing the humanity in every human being.
That is indeed beautiful
@@eckey03 fuck yeah i agree
The “Eternal youth yet old souls” hit me so hard
I’m an Enfp and I’ve never been able to quite put my finger on how to explain my mental age because I feel so young and so old at the same time, I’ve always felt more morally wiser than my peers yet I feel like I look at different things from a younger perspective, idk if it sounds weird but that really hit close to home
That’s strange duality between feeling old and young simultaneously is definitely something I’ve noticed from ENFPs. It’s always cool to see people resonating with the descriptions from the videos! ~ Nathan
ENFP here, and yup this checks out. It's very very rare for me to have nothing in common with someone 😅
Then you gotta find more infp :)
SAME 😅
Had the privilege of being raised by an ENFP and then had the further privilege of marrying one. Something I've noticed with my mom, my husband and other ENFP friends is that they are incredibly socially resilient. When people correct them they take it in stride (and boy is that ever hard to do when the other person doing the correcting is actually in the wrong). Who knows how many wars the world has avoided due to the graciousness of ENFPs!
Thank you ENFPs for being wonderful, weird and wise.
Also, I know you ENFPs try to hide your tears, but a dear INFJ friend once told me that tears are an important part of us because tears show what matter to us. And seeing how much something matters to you, isn't that something worth seeing? If tears show the real you, aren't you someone worth seeing? Let the tears flow, they don't flow unless something is wrong, much like our bodies don't bleed unless something is wrong. Tears are the blood of our emotions. Be sure to make friends who will see you bleeding and care.
Lots of love. ❤
Thank you for writing this. ❤🤗🤗🤗
This was beautiful. Thank you.
I just being attacked by a close friend for a mistake I didn't make and your writing makes me cry here. Thank you so much 🙏🏼. She apologized to me again after his bf scolded her for treating me like that when everything was just a misunderstanding, saying that if it was someone else getting attacked instead of me, the friendship would've gone for good. I'm trying to brush it off right now because it hurts so much, all the words she said to me in the spit of the emotions. I just hope nothing like this would ever happen again in my life. Because I'm losing hope with friendship right now.
Excuse me, this is an insanely beautiful comment. I teared up reading this. Wow thank you so much 🥲
I will never stop saying this. I worship the ground ENFPs walk on and adore them with all my heart.
-INFJ
I am ENFP and my bestie are INFJ, and yes i love her so much! ❤️
You are a bit too generous, my dear.
I feel that the dark side is a wondering for why the hell we are here, what the hell we are doing, and why are so many people destroying the planet and hating each other and making life terribly difficult.
The ENFP love in the comments is making me so happy
I’m (ISFP) lucky to be married to an ENFP. She’s an incredible human with the most weird stories and interactions you could ever ask for. That Ne/Fi combo is just spectacular when it comes to the creation of storytelling, wit, and recollection of memories. You are right about the darkness, btw. For someone so happy on the outside, there’s a sadness within that they can’t keep up or meet the ideals they hold in their head and heart.
If you don’t know an ENFP, find one!!!
Amazing comment, 'storytelling and wit' is totally something they're masters at, well said ~ Nathan
isfp-enfp couple omgg the cutest..
@@trapqueen976 truly... my relationships with ISFPs are some of the most deep and loving... and we are coooonstantly in stitches. Master combo IMO lol
Same here! Been a year with my isfp boyfie and we are soo lovely dovey and clingyyy 🥰🥰🥰
@@ris4430 my ISFP partner and I are are so lovey dovey as well haha >:}}
As an ENFP I agree so much with the term"Walking Paradox". It applies to many aspects and layers of our personality. Aside your example, there's the thing with us constantly contradicting and doubting ourselves along every step of our way, despite the amount of effort we might put in to encourage other people showing their true personalities. Strangely, a lot of stuff we do for others often doesn't apply to us in our heads. Another one is one of our biggest fears being loneliness, yet, we still often isolate ourselves when our "dark side" comes to surface (this thing is also paradoxical, ofc).
To mention a somewhat silly example of the contradictory nature of ENFPs regarding my life: I like to send short video messages to the people around me, and when I rewatch them, I often observe myself insantly contradicting and doubting every statement that leaves my mouth, sometimes multiple times just in one sentence (which makes me sound so ridiculous).
I'm sorry if this writing wasn't very clear, I have a messy train of thought and English is not my first lang :P
I'm a walking contradiction like the Green Day Song
Apart from me being a goofball, I think that you explain yourself very well (From an Enfp to another Enfp)
Same here 🖐🏻 you did great
I love it when someone speaks English better than you and then finishes with... "English is not my first language." Great comment ~ Nathan
Isolation when the dark side comes to the surface is so true! I try isolating myself, but I end up overdoing it and feel worse.
My sister is an ENFP and she is definitely disillusioned with the world. Her mantra is pretty much 'people suck' and as an INFP, I largely agree with her.
Hey wait that's my mantra lol
What a dream! INFP/ENFP sisters!! 😍🥺 -ENFP
Always nice to have a little representation from some non-ENFPs. As an ENFP, I genuinely appreciate being *seen* , you know? Great videos as always, man!
Thank you very much, it's really nice to do videos on different types (ones that don't always get big views) and have people of that type enjoy it! ~ Nathan
I’m an INFJ and my mom is an ENFP. This is how I know God loves me. ^_^
Possible ENFP-type quote: "See, you don't have to think about doing the right thing. If you're for the right thing, then you do it without thinking." - Maya Angelou (who may or may not have been ENFP)
Love the ENFP's instincts for good will!
Great comment and quote ~ Nathan
🙂
Greek ENFP gang🖐
@@xodroraccoon (well technically she was American but hey)
@@obscurellepriscillatopin7506 yeah true😅
I'm really in awe of an ENFP friend of mine and the way he not only moves with ease through chaos but uses it to fuel his creativity. I mean, I love an intellectual problem to solve, but what most would consider unbearable, unreasonable situations are his breakfast, lunch and dinner! Though, too, there is certainly that sadness you pointed out... but he's still so much BETTER at handling it and using it to churn out still more art and prose. It's enough to make a person jealous of that kind of mental poise.
The first sentence of this comment brilliantly describes both ENFPs and ENTPs and equally describes my shock and awe at how well they can navigate through and ride the wave of chaos ~ Nathan
@@lovewho thank you, enfp here. Great video Nathan. How we process so fast at once is pure chaos. It's natural code for us. Doesn't stress us, we're usually 5-10 steps ahead of everyone and have already evaluated the outcome. Namaste ❤️, and again, thank you
You're making me happy to know that... Sometimes i doubt that capacity to overcome things and so a lot 👉👈
Thank you!
- enfp-t
In chaos is truly where we thrive most... but the flip-side of that is that whenever we need to do anything practical or that requires patience we are at such a loss haha. Everyone has their own virtues!
Damn when you said it like that, i seem to notice when everyone else is panicking im the only dude thats like relaxed lmao, i work surprisingly well under pressure
This fluctuation between light and darkness in relation to the ongoing tension between reality vs. fantasy/idealism sums up my brain perfectly! You got ENFPs right!
This is really great to hear, I always wonder whether my ramblings make any sense ~ Nathan
My mom and one of my close friends are ENFPs, they’re AMAZING.
-INFP
That's a lot of NFP vibes... ~ Nathan
You're SO lucky to have an ENFP mum, as will be my children inchalah ahahah, but i keep wondering what are the predefined shortcomings I will have as an ENFP mum..
damn thanks for the ego trip 😎
Any time! ~ Nathan
Out of all the descriptions of ENFPs I've heard, this one describes me the most accurately. I'm basically a Care Bear with a horrifying sense of humor.
I'm 41, and have been exploring my ENFPness for years now. Idealism and being constantly open to everything because everything is interesting and amazing also lets in the not so wonderful. Suffering of others is something that brings me to the dark, as well as destruction of nature. I can't help but feel as though I am connected to everything and mourn with some, celebrate with others.
This is a very ENFP comment! ~ Nathan
Yes to feeling connected. And also cultivating that feeling in ourselves and wishing others felt more connected (because then maybe there would be more motivation to be kind to others and invested in the well-being of other people and our planet).
Hey, I'm also a 41-year old ENFP and can very, very much relate to what you wrote - to the extent where I could have written it myself. I've become somewhat of a climate activists in the past two years, but constantly have had to find ways to deal with the destruction happening on this planet, so the knowledge doesn't absolutely destroy me. It's an almost overwhelming grief I feel sometimes. Sending warm hugs from Berlin!
@@DerKommendePark Hey I can feel that so much!! I'm also an ENFP (and even though I'm 17) I totally agree. I've become vegan half a year ago and since then I've been diving deeper and deeper into climate-justice-activism-stuff. Seems like us ENFPs are pretty concerned with the harm being caused to people, animals and the whole environment. As you're from Germany, too, you've probably heard about the deforestation of the "Dannenröder Forst"😓🌲. I'm very close to join the rebellion there during the Christmas holidays...
Lots of love🥰💚
@@June-hd8xv Oh wow, yes I made a poster to support the activists in Danni! A lot of people I know have been there or are going this week - everyone's really shocked about the police violence, please take care if you do go. I also made a calendar for 2021 that I'm giving to activists in Danni to say thank you, please let me know if you want one, and I'll send it to you in the post - you can contact me via pm on instagram, if you like! This is me: instagram.com/illustration_by_emily/
What a coincidence to meet you in the comments of a random youtube video!!
As an infp, I love enfp because I can be myself and not feel drained by being around them. They believe in you and your dreams. Most of my friends are enfp because they don't mind my disappearing act ... they are very understanding...
My sis is enfp too but we fight alot (which is weird because I never fight with my enfp friends)
What makes you fight?
@@mefloquine lol it's minor stuff.. sibling stuff... like she ignores me while I'm busy pouring my feelings or telling her stores.. she thinks I'm boring. I hate being ignored.
My intp brother tells me when his stop listening to me which I prefer. She doesn't.
She doesn't like doing chores. I end up doing most of it.. at least she cooks so we don't fight about this as much...
And she used to think I was dad's favorite, while I thought she was moms...
We fight and five min later we laughing and talking.. my brother is the mediator most of the time...
It's better now.. now that we are all on our 20s
@@NkosiCebile Girl, i hate beeing ignored too, i feel you. 😔 I hope you will be able to fix the misunderstandings
Infp stand up!
Sibling conflict always manages to rise above lol! ~ Nathan
“Bridge between people or groups that would otherwise never interact.” “They can always find a part of themselves that relates to, or resonates with, a person.” Really moved by those observation in particular!! I relate to feeling like I can talk with/connect with most people and hope that, that skill can develop into building bridges as I develop!! Especially in this day and age.
Also, I liked the point about lightness and darkness. I think, like you said, the darkness is born when, as we’re growing up, we encounter the harshness and darkness of the real world and our idealistic view of things is ruined. But then we can accept the truth of the darkness and marvel at the little kindnesses and moments of light and joy that exist despite the harsh realities. We realize that a lot of people are selfish and unkind (and that we, ourselves, are capable of meanness and selfishness)-so when someone takes the time to say a kind word to others, or hold the door as we’re running into work, or smile at a stranger, it feels even more meaningful. It’s like, well things are awful...but at least there are people out there trying to be good and trying to have a positive presence in the world, and I want to be one of the good ones.
You perfectly summed it up
@@emna7797 ☺️👍🏻
I resonate with everything :( ❤️
- enfp-t
Wow, you sound so much like me! Hahaha You just said everything that I have thought about before!!! ❤️
@@giselealves4645
Yeah this is so true. Even though I'm deeply idealistic, I'm very aware of reality which confuses a lot of people because they will usually have an idea which gets crushed by reality, whereas I will always try to see how to adapt things better. It's not always easy but there's always a possibility where things work out for the better. Thanks for the video!
Thank you for the comment and I'm glad you enjoyed it! ~ Nathan
yes. there where is a will there is a way. always.
Yep, my ENFP friends like weirdos like me - INTJ.
INTJ/ENFP duos/friendships/relationships are weird but brilliant combinations ~ Nathan
I think the mbti has made the people more accepting. I'm glad i know stuff.
-enfp
ENFP here! I really appreciate you acknowledging our dark side ... I would put it exactly as you described it: our idealism is fatalistically disappointing in light of reality and it's very painful to constantly have that bubble burst and have to pick yourself up again, only to get your bubble burst and have to do the whole thing over again.
As an enfp it's very real... where I always want to turn sad moments into fun ones, you could even say that in all situations I'm more tolerant because I don't want to ruin the atmosphere or even make the relationship awkward.
Even the branding I get is a person with all the fun, I can make jokes about everything and try to support people who are not good. if they don't know me well, they will be jealous because they think I don't have any problems in life and ask me for tips.
There are also some of them who think serious conversations are not suitable to talk to me about. but when I want to become closer and truly be friends with that person, I will immediately provoke him to trust and be more open so that at that point I show that this is me who can actually be friends with in any condition, be it casual, joking or even serious.
This video was great. The dark side of the ENFP can definitely be interesting, and it happens like a switch, honestly. Everything is great one minute and within a second, it starts to seem awful. It can go on for hours, but usually abates. I've had it, and it sucks. For those in which it doesn't abate, though, and persists for days, weeks, years, it can get very interesting. Probably the best example of a restless ENFP with a cause is Che Guevara, as he took his personal view of injustice and fought for it in relentless ways. That's definitely an outlier, though, and so hard to imagine 99.9999999% of ENFPs from ever doing that, due to our love for people.
If you haven't already seen it, feel free to watch 'The Darkside of the ENFP' video too! ~ Nathan
ENFP’s see the simultaneous beauty and sadness in everything. They also feel it. There’s a cycle of hope and despair for humanity and really all life on earth. We are deep and passionate to the point which it can be overwhelming. 🌎💔
Honestly as an ENFP this was very refreshing to watch. Enfps get stereotyped with so often (which we’re fine with because it entertains people) but we have very introspective and philosophical thoughts too. It’s super true what was described in this video: seeing the world as a playground one day, and seeing it as restricting and hopeless the next. I also liked what you said about enjoying being the bridge between people who would normally never connect. And the spontaneous fun way of life!! This was so great thank you :,)
My friend is an ENFP and I'm an INFJ.
Oh gosh, I miss him already ;-;
As an ENFP, I find myself having goosebumps after watching your video. It's just really heartwarming but in a weird way that I can't even put my finger on. Especially the part when you said "The genius of an ENFP, is to give people permission to be themselves," it's just somehow so true even I don't know what to say anymore.
amen! i liked that too..ps ..you are a cool god.. look !! it's the goodrich blimp...wink
ENFP here🤗 Loved the video💫❤ The walking paradox and the dark side are absolutely true!
Glad to heat that you agreed with it! ~ Nathan
Hiiii🤩🤩🤩🙌🙌🙌
I do feel that duality in my self. Its like one day I feel happy and gretful for pepole and nature, the other day I feel disgust at how horrible we are towards her and each other.
What you said about an ENFP being the most paradoxical type I relate to a bunch. I had a friend who saw me as innocent and child-like. Then, one day I cracked a dark, perverted joke, and she just couldn't comprehend how someone could be so light and playful one second, then crude and dark the next.
I'm in this video and I kinda like it
👏
as an enfp, i always fall in love with the words you use to describe us. thanks for this immaculate content
"have a radar for the peculiar" I have never heard a more accurate description
I'm 45 seconds into watching this and I think I'm gonna cry. I just recently found out my personality type and feeling understood and understanding myself has been so liberating.
i'm an infp and my best friend of 10 years is an enfp. there's never a dull moment around her; she loves telling stories, which i appreciate because i can just listen and let her lead the conversation. she's super bubbly most of the time, but there are also times where our conversations take a deep or dark turn and it surprises me.
I’m an enfp and honestly he got almost everything right, we’re very in the middle people, not in the sense that we can’t make up our minds, or we’re very natural, enfps are very positive people and mainly want the best for the people around them, what I’m saying is we are the true ambivert, always on the cusp of mental breakdown and laughing, normally we let the positive side win. Most of the time humor is our main coping mechanism and when things seem like their crumbling to pieces that’s what we jump for. We’re empathetic and good natured, even though we’re pretty chaotic. In the end enfps will almost always find the good in people and sympathize with their emotions and struggles. We put others before ourselves, because we just in general love people.
Spot on, I love my ENFP.
Sincerely, INTJ.
Really? I thought intj accept us cuz they got no option.glad to hear.
Awww I thought INTJs would think we're too annoying :') thank you for this
Exactly. The biggest pain is not from what went wrong, as that could still be somehow forgiven and turned to good, but for what could have happened and never did. Missed and wasted potential. Acceptance of gloomy reality. When the world of possibilities turns into a reality of restrictions, rountines, powerlessness and repeatedness of poor choices of massed...when ability to bring change seems too far away. That's a dark place to be in ones ❤️....never ending fight for hope to stand up and continue believing in the impossible...and giving all you have to make it happen...or at least more real to others.
ENTP but reaaaally relate to this, esp. the bridge between ppl thing. Or find smth to relate with everyone.
Same here, also an ENTP but this relates to me a LOT. I'm always trying to relate with everyone, purely because it makes socialising more fun. I think that might be our tertiary Fe function at work there.
@@ZacharyT94 you’re probably right! I also feel like it’s more my Ne at work though, easily finding connections between interests/viewpoints/etc that makes it easy to finding smth to relate to anyone. And when I can’t, the insatiable desire to add one more way to see the world to my mind web of interconnected ideas compels me to get to know them anyway
@@tessy4018 To be honest it's probably both Ne and Fe at work, Fe being a driving factor to trigger Ne to find connections
That makes a lot of sense, ENFPs and ENTPs overlap in many ways so many of the points in the ENFP videos on here will resonate with ENTPs as well ~ Nathan
100%, amazing how accurate these types are to people. Being an ENFP, I related to all of this.
Oh my gosh this is so me!! I am an ENFP. My major in college is international studies. I am learning 3 languages right now. All of my best friends have been outsiders who I have talked to. I have struggled so much with depression, as well as other mental disorders, especially when I feel disappointed in life. I even tried to commit suicide.
Well, what should I say. Life can only make you dizzy. Peace of mind is the highest form of existing.
Totally agree with this! Us ENFPs can often be seen as naive too due to our playful and lively attitude. In reality, we know much more than people can imagine!
As an ENTP, I can also relate to a lot of this, and definitely think that what you said about the dark side and childish humour is an Ne think predominantly
we are so wise and from all our hardships that we know the only way to stay true to ourselves is to never let go of that child spark its where all of our creativity and empathy come from we are very emotionally mature but only after have a moment of emotional immaturity
So much I could say... Walking paradox for sure! Except that I'm often sitting... watching UA-cam to explore the world of ideas and feed my Ne. Quirky humor? Check. The bad puns and random connections for comedic sake just happen to me! It's not like I make the stuff up. Those just pop into my brain and I have to let them out. The world IS a playground some days and others I struggle... mainly because I still haven't followed through on all the things that I dream about. Weird how endless possibilities can be limiting in the sense that in order to succeed in this life you have to narrow your focus and stay in that lane over time. The struggle is real! Still, I manage to make unfocused work somehow. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself. Something ENFPs are... I know I am. Self critical is a thing while also being supremely confident at times. I can give pretty much everyone a pass and see things from their perspective which brings understanding and compassion. But. I can be pretty hard on myself for the smallest blunders. (and the big ones too) Also, I use too many exclamation points! and the three dot thing... so there's that :-) Back to bouncing off the walls and hopefully making people laugh! Maybe I'll write another parody song today. Maybe. Thanx for your insightfulness!
I relate to that too many exclamation points and three dot thing, haha ! .... the rest, too, but that really hit me !!
@@meredith3588 Thanx! Oh, and spelling Thanx with an x :-)
it just adds something to the text...!!
lol
So relatable
Excellent comment ~ Nathan
Very true, as an ENFP I need to experience and embrace the darker lessons in life, in order to grow towards a greater light. There is no color without light and no light without darkness, there is only dull grey.
i feel honored to be an enfp now
“ it’s like one side(dark/bright) can’t live without the other “ as an ENFP I can tell this is true af
My friend from middle school, who I believe to be an ESFP, and who I reunited with in-person recently, said that about me - that I'm unconditionally accepting and always giving the people that nobody else bothers with, chances. It was nice to hear, because that's what I want to do, I don't want anyone to feel rejected and excluded like me. And also... I see nothing wrong with them. "Weird" individual differences aren't bad. Of course, I need to learn to be more careful sometimes... but I wouldn't give it up ever. I guess it also naturally comes with high/dom Ne, seeing different angles of a situation easily and not letting anything be understood one-dimensionally.
An ENFP friend of mine is dedicated to humor and writing, and she is brilliant and underappreciated. She is a "brainiac" who embraced all kinds of oddballs and eventually achieved her biggest dream, which was to get remarried, this time to a man who truly loved her.
Thank you! That video was amazing! I find that a strenght ENFPs have is being able to understand people below the surface. Insted of just taking information as it is presented, we ask « why », « what do you mean by(...) » or « how does that affect you ». What i like to discover is what the person is not saying, because, sometimes, what someone really wants to express is what they are not saying. I find that it’s a usefull skill to help others to understand themeselves and help them put words on thoughts they could not clarify. I simply love to hear people talking about themeselves 😊
The last line in your comment is a big part of what makes ENFP so charismatic, they genuinely love and are curious about people ~ Nathan
I would so love to have an ENFP in my inner circle.
I've also shared that quote from Oscar Wilde before, as it resonated!
- INFJ
That quote definitely resonates with people on many levels but nonetheless it did feel right for this video. I agree that having ENFPs in your inner circle is excellent, they inject a lot of fun into your life whilst being able to keep up with pretty much anyone in a crazy variety of topics ~ Nathan
@@lovewho very fitting quote! I'd say they are more optimistic than I 🙂
I'll send one of my clone to you. Don't worry my friend.
@@inyshel7018 Haha, thanks my friend. I no longer will have to go without all the wonderment and magic 😎
@@jessenceq3250 did it reach there yet? I think i mistakenly sent it to Beyonce. ☁😊☁
OMG that idealism/fantasy land vs the reality thing has cconstantly got me wanting to cry. So true! loved this
this really made me feel better about myself!! people around me always tell me that i’m embarrassing or weird which was very confusing, still is! i don’t understand what’s bothering them, i’m really glad that i found people out there that i can actually relate to! thank you for your kind words sir :D
-enfp
I get the 'you're weird' thing...a lot.
But only from people who don't know me well enough.
My thought process is so different from that of the majority of people I know, I have had to learn that originality is not welcomed by everyone....
Namaste ❤️ everyone! I am humbled by everyone's extremely moving and inspiring comments. I'm 62yo 13yo at heart enfp 425 equally empath. We do give freely without expecting anything back. We will move mountains for strangers. When we hear such kindness, compassion, love back. It replenishes our humble spirit. Namaste ❤️
It’s weird bc I’m incredibly talkative and social around people but I am definitely geeky, I feel like I come off as someone who doesn’t really like school or “nerdy stuff” but Ill find my self getting excited about geeky things and school. The line that said that enfos come off as youthful and energetic but have an old soul really speaks to me
Wow, I'm not an ENFP, but this is definitely one of my favourite videos from your channel.
I loved your perspective about them, and your analysis is very... accurate, yet it is something that you don't hear very often about this personality
Thanks for sharing your thoughts:) Love the fact that they're original and make sense
What type are you Diana?
lemme guess: it's either Infj or infp
@@kiokuart ...Well, ENTJ actually😅
@@dianahidalgo8446 aww !!
This is great to hear, I often wonder which people of which type watch the videos other than the type in the title of the video. Also getting praise from ENTJs is always a rare treat ~ Nathan
As an ENFP, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing all the way through this! Because this is the most spot-ON description ever said about our internal and external world. There’s often a stereotype of us being impulsive, airheaded, irresponsible relentlessly optimistic cheerleaders, which couldn’t be further from the truth. We indulge that dark side-a LOT, lol. We are Hallmark and macabre murder documentaries in the same breath. Idealistic yet bitter. Extroverted yet loners. Want affection but not too much. We live in the land of multi-tiered paradox but it makes perfect sense to us. Anything less complex is far too dull. 🤣
I agree about the bipolar outlook effect - I think it can also have something to do with out intimate relationships, though, not just seeing the big picture potential/reality of the world. When we accept people as they are, we open ourselves up to enjoying the good things about them, but also their dark and hurtful sides. It's like I don't fight their darkness by default - I have to absorb it first. That can be really sad and heartbreaking, even if the person is not aiming their darkness at me. A solution or path of growth may or may not come later.
As an ENFP, I do agree with us letting others be themselves and sometimes ending up with the "weird" ppl. I mean, I can surely chat with just anyone very easily, but what I love the most is getting to know ppl for what they really are -- all they like, do, don't like and all their dreams and even traumas, I love to know every person as if they were the closest person to me [although, of course, to a lot of people that also looks like intrusive or too intense or strange, haha], but it's true. And when I look at the past and my present, I see it. I've always made friends with the "weird" guys or ppl who talked less or had less friends in a class or anywhere, and I'd do my best to make them feel at home when they talk to me or spend time with me.
I know ppl who are afraid or tired of trying to make new friends, of traying to meet just anyone, but I do really love them -- every person /is/ a whole world and a whole galaxy, and that always amazes me.
I'm currently working at a small store, and I get to have brief chats with random or regular clients every now and then, and I love when they tell me what they like or feel or think or just anything about their lives, it's just amazing.
1:03
Me an enfp who made a “weirdos club” that anyone could join but mostly for the outcasts and those who didnt have many friends back in 7th grade- 👀
this is so true!!!! the darkness balances the light and vice versa--i am so grateful for my sense of humor--it has added sweetness to tragedy, it has built bridges where none seemed possible, it has spoken boundaries with tenderness and strength. and i don't think i would have it so strongly, or use it so boldly, if it were not for the darkness--for seeing it, feeling it, and being passionately agaisnt the "wrongdoing". thank you for speaking to this.
As an ENFP I totally agree with these, including the paradox between that playful positive side (youthful spirit) vs the dark side (old soul). I’ve been actually called out on both of these in my life.
So spot on 💖 Proud ENFP right here! Embracing the duality!
My ENFP boyfriend is amazing! We discuss our dreams at night. He says he always has weird dreams. I say I never remember. He replies that I dont dream at night because I daydream too much.
I love that reply!! ~ Nathan
@@lovewho btw - Im INFP :)
Ownn!
The dark side of my ENFP comes out if I have to miss breakfast....I love breakfast!👁️
I think you described the dark and the upbeat contradictory sides perfectly! For me, I know reality is broad and in the middle. But dramatized emotions might just feel like the colors of life that keep my momentum going. Also there just feels to be something boring about in the middle. :) idk
“A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world”
As an ENFP with big dreams… chills.
Thanks for seeing us so clearly! I have always been drawn to paradoxes. I forget who said it, but "if it isn't paradoxical, it isn't true"
Oh I loved this video!! So correct!!
I'm an ENFP and well yeah I always want to make people happy and simply enjoy looking at others smiling and laughing
And also about being lost...that's true as well... I mostly don't try to duel on it but it's the sheer truth and it sometimes just gets to you so bad...
Also having a dark side... yeah... It's as if there are these two sides one is kind of tired of everything and everyone including myself and just the whole world and life itself!! the dark side... and the other is as bright, cheerful and carefree as a kid... and the kid mostly has the control... but of course the dark old friend is ALWAYS there... and can show up out of nowhere sometimes....like you suddenly feel so sad and out of energy, see no reason or whatsoever in life and the whole world crumbles under your feet....
You see so many possibilities a second and the next you're like "no...none of them are going to happen" and feel pretty disappointed and down
Oh and about being very accepting... well yes I think everyone has the right to be understood by someone and be heard...not from others and whatever they think or/and say about that person but by the person herself/himself.... and well honestly I never thought I ACTUALLY understood many of my friends...I did to some levels but if they were after being understood, I don't think I could give it to them 100% (yeah the paradox side... confident but at the same time not really)
but yeah I can relate to many things others may say....
Oh and I totally like getting close to those whom others may call weirdos and may not want to be friends with them...I totally feel like getting to know these kind of people and who they are... I mean... mostly people don't *see* these 'weirdos'... they misunderstand them without even trying to understand them...and I don't think that's fair...
Oh...I feel like it got too long!! I might've not read it if I were you!! Hahaha
And of course a true paradox ALL THE TIME!! (It may even be seen in what I typed just now!!)
Now I need an ENFP....🥺🥺🥺
i'm! ... but in another country, maybe do you know Polish xd? i send a lot of warm and love to you !
@@iskra5561 Lol don't know Polish
Thanks for the love, I just received them🥺🥺🥺❤❤❤
@@iskra5561 Piąteczka! ❤️⚡️
@@Dziewczynanamedycynie polka tutaj!
Hii
Blending tragedy and comedy is definitely true. However as an ENFP I would argue against the "we're all doomed" thing, depending on the type. ENFPs can be sorted between spiritual and unspiritual. Spiritual ENFPs (like myself) will joke about dark humor but not assume all of us are without hope. "Unspiritual" ENFPs, I've found, are far more cynical and driven by an angry energy than an upbeat one.
as an enfp i am constantly drawn to other enfp's and infp's
3:00 that perfectly describes the Ne/Si swings, whoa
Glad to hear it! ~ Nathan
As an ENFP, what resonated with me the most was the bridges between people that we make, at school I talk to so many different groups and I've got so many different friends from so many different walks of life. I don't know about other ENFP's but I love the quote from dickens "It was the best of times, It was the worst of times" and feel like I live like that a lot!
You've just described me better than anyone talking about enfp ever
I love being an ENFP! We are awesome (so long as you are not looking for stability). :)
As an ENFP, I can definitely resonate with the aspect of having a dark side. Most people see me as a bright, upbeat creative dude who is always happy and making people laugh. However, while I do consider myself a happy person, I have a very dark side that only the people closest to me know about. Few would ever know that I am extremely hard on myself, and have a deep, brooding, philosophical side. I am very critical of my creative work (i.e. my music, art, design, creative writing, etc). Many people see my work and are amazed, but most don't realize how often I look at my work and tell myself it's not good enough. I think it's normal for most artists to be very self-critical, so I know I'm not saying anything out of the ordinary. I just don't think most 'normal' people see the dark side of us so called 'happy' artists. Many view Bob Ross as a 'happy' artist, while others see Van Gogh as a 'tortured soul,' yet I believe both of them had a dark side. Some artists just know how to hide it better than others.
As an ENFP , from a very early age I have been drawn to the unconventional, unique, and different from myself.
I cried when you said that. we are individuals that see a len with many glasses. Not a lot of people understand this. In addition, I love it when my managers said to me "sam, you radiate a warmth and kind personality which impact everyone" I think that's why I am a successful teacher, I am flexible and although not perfect. I have the ability to inspire others to make themselves to be the best version of themselves.
I'm an INTP in a relationship with an ENFP and this is like 100% accurate.
As an ENFP I feel like I’m either elated or depressed lol, there’s no in-between
"They never seem to quite make sense" i feel attacked. Lol.
Yes I'm a living paradox 😩 it's not easy all the time but at the same time I'm used to it and don't mind it at all. You described me perfectly in this whole video.