I had almost 7 years clean, went out and bought a bundle, and at first I thought they were beat bags(they were only $3, it was pure white powder, smelled and tasted a little different than what I was used to, etc.) I get home, decide to cook up a bag, and shoot like 1/6th of the bag just to be safe(meaning in case whatever whatever powder they put in the beat bags would hurt me, but also in case it had fentanyl in it.) Within like 5-10 seconds I started getting high, realized it was real, and shot another 1/5 or so of the bag. Bad idea. I was _out._ And mind you, I'm still on 40mg of methadone A day, so it's not like I had no tolerance. A couple times I barely regained consciousness, and the last time I did I felt like my body, especially my heart and respiratory system, was shutting down. It was like I couldn't get enough oxygen. So luckily I had a couple of those Narcan nasal sprays at my house, and decided to open up the box and put it on my desk where I was shooting up. And thank God I did, because I honestly believe that if I hadn't done that, I would not have been able to get to the Narcan, or possibly even open the box, despite it literally being in my desk drawer right to the right of me. Anyways, I hit myself with the Narcan in one nostril, and I wanted to call the police, but I couldn't manage it, and ended up unconscious/nodding again, still struggling to breath(I was afraid if I went to sleep I would die, as I have central and obstructive sleep apnea, and my doctors say it's from the methadone/opiates.) A few minutes later, I woke up sweating my ass off, and felt fucking horrible. I was a little dope sick, but it wasn't even that. It was horrible physical, and almost panicky feeling from the Narcan itself(I always assumed if I got Narcanned that I would just wake up dope sick. Nuh-uh. It fucking sucks.) However, at this point I'm still barely conscious, and I still couldn't figure out(nor stay awake long enough) to call 911, and I felt like my breathing was getting worse, but I did manage to hit my other nostril with the Narcan. So back to nodding out, but this time, after maybe 5 minutes, I was more conscious/alert(despite still feeling horrible), and was just barely able to call 911. I still couldn't answer simple, basic questions, even questions that I would normally be able to answer without even thinking about it(such as my age, address, etc.) Sorry, I'm rambling. Anyways, it was of course fentanyl(though it did also test positive for heroin when the police tested it.) Shit is just so fucking different out here now compared to when I was using. I can't even imagine what it must be like to have to shoot up several times a day just live, but know that every time you shoot up could be your last. Fucking crazy.
Caddy one of the Illest to do it and such a dope battle MC! Rest easy Caddy
RIP CADDY 😢
WOOOOOO
Gonna OD to this shit some day
This will def support that sick one
I had almost 7 years clean, went out and bought a bundle, and at first I thought they were beat bags(they were only $3, it was pure white powder, smelled and tasted a little different than what I was used to, etc.)
I get home, decide to cook up a bag, and shoot like 1/6th of the bag just to be safe(meaning in case whatever whatever powder they put in the beat bags would hurt me, but also in case it had fentanyl in it.)
Within like 5-10 seconds I started getting high, realized it was real, and shot another 1/5 or so of the bag. Bad idea. I was _out._ And mind you, I'm still on 40mg of methadone A day, so it's not like I had no tolerance.
A couple times I barely regained consciousness, and the last time I did I felt like my body, especially my heart and respiratory system, was shutting down. It was like I couldn't get enough oxygen.
So luckily I had a couple of those Narcan nasal sprays at my house, and decided to open up the box and put it on my desk where I was shooting up. And thank God I did, because I honestly believe that if I hadn't done that, I would not have been able to get to the Narcan, or possibly even open the box, despite it literally being in my desk drawer right to the right of me.
Anyways, I hit myself with the Narcan in one nostril, and I wanted to call the police, but I couldn't manage it, and ended up unconscious/nodding again, still struggling to breath(I was afraid if I went to sleep I would die, as I have central and obstructive sleep apnea, and my doctors say it's from the methadone/opiates.)
A few minutes later, I woke up sweating my ass off, and felt fucking horrible. I was a little dope sick, but it wasn't even that. It was horrible physical, and almost panicky feeling from the Narcan itself(I always assumed if I got Narcanned that I would just wake up dope sick. Nuh-uh. It fucking sucks.)
However, at this point I'm still barely conscious, and I still couldn't figure out(nor stay awake long enough) to call 911, and I felt like my breathing was getting worse, but I did manage to hit my other nostril with the Narcan.
So back to nodding out, but this time, after maybe 5 minutes, I was more conscious/alert(despite still feeling horrible), and was just barely able to call 911. I still couldn't answer simple, basic questions, even questions that I would normally be able to answer without even thinking about it(such as my age, address, etc.)
Sorry, I'm rambling. Anyways, it was of course fentanyl(though it did also test positive for heroin when the police tested it.) Shit is just so fucking different out here now compared to when I was using. I can't even imagine what it must be like to have to shoot up several times a day just live, but know that every time you shoot up could be your last. Fucking crazy.