I am English, my wife is Russian and we live in the French-speaking part of Switzerland. Our daughter is now 15. She is absolutely native in Russian, English and French. By "native" I mean better than merely fluent - she has no detectable accent to native speakers of any of the 3 languages. So I feel a bit "qualified" to comment. Your approach seems the right one to me. This worked for us: Reading books to our daughter at every opportunity (and at bedtime without fail very night) - me speaking ONLY in English, my speaking wife ONLY in Russian - i.e. Each parent only in the language they are 100% comfortable with. Then, from the age of 2 she attended a French-only creche/kindergarden and then local schools. She moves fluently and fluidly between all 3 languages. She has been learning a 4th language - German - at school for several years and seemed to pick it up much quicker than most children. Our daughter does not do this but we know of children who do the "you can speak to me in your language but I will reply to you in the community language" but just stick to the "rules" which in your case is "mummy and daddy speak to you ONLY in English"! My strong advice is that you continue on your path: speak English at home and your son WILL speak German in the community. Do not worry about whether or not he will do this - he will amaze you at how quickly he does this once he is mingling with German-speaking children. And speaking 2 languages will help him to pick up a 3rd or 4th language with ease. Then just wait for that knife-to-the-heart moment when he says to you "I know the word in German but I do not know what it is in English"!!!
my wife was raised similiar. Greece at home, german in community. she is so talented in learning languages, that she learned spanish, italian, french with ease. Now she tries to learn japanese and korean. I think the sooner a child learns diffrent languages, the easier she learns new languages as an adult.
My children have a Dutch father and an English mother. They grew up in the Netherlands. By today’s standards we did everything wrong when it comes to bilingual education. Sometimes we spoke Dutch, at other times we spoke English. I sometimes spoke English with the children and my wife spoke Dutch with them, or vice versa. It didn’t matter. They are fully bilingual. At 4 years old the eldest could do more or less simultaneous translation between her two great-grandmothers one of whom didn’t speak English and the other didn’t speak Dutch. Children are so versatile.
Have heard similar from friends. I tie some of this to fun songs or stories to help the kids when they don't hear a language outside the home. They enjoyed learning some Dutch from a song about flavors of ice cream.
Raising your (so cute) little one bilingual or building your new home.... you put so much effort, deep research and at least fully comprehension for every little detail into each "project". I love that approach, admire your energy that goes into it and most of all... thank you so much for sharing all of your thoughts, concerns and experiences.
MY children were brought up tri-lingual they learned Portuguese from their mother, English from me and Dutch at school - if you start early it is quite simple
I am American, my husband is German so he spoke German to our children. I spoke English only with my now 15 and 17 year olds because my German was so new to me when they were little. However, they heard me speak poor German from the start in day to day life as I had to speak German to Erzieher, shops keepers, neighbors, doctors and everything else in life. But I read to them in English, my husband in German and by the time they started Grundschule, they could already read basic stories in English and German as well as switch languages like a switch and they knew exactly which language to speak to which person. Example, we boarded a flight to the US, as the Lufthansa plane landed, my then 4 year old stood up and though he spoke German the entire flight, loudly stated in English, “Ok, now we must speak English!” I had another passenger say to me in German, if only if were that easy. Lucky child. Since we also spent 6 weeks at a time in the US, my children also used their English speaking with family and cousins. When strangers suddenly heard my boys switch to a German when talking to my husband, they always did a double take. Their English was fluent and accentless. They could not believe their English was their lesser used language. Growing up in the US, my parents were Italian immigrants so we spoke only Italian at home and with the relatives. The older cousins, some born in Italy including my brother all spoke fluent Italian. Being part of the youngest cousin group, I understood all Italian but mostly answered in English ( Shame on me, I can say now.) But I had no other use for Italian growing up. All my relatives were already in the US and there was no other opportunity to speak Italian. Also no UA-cam, Netflix and even getting Italian story books and such was costly and difficult. I think having English as a second(ary) language is also easier now with UA-cam, Netflix, original language films shown in the theaters. I just look at my boys’ friends and how fluent they are in English even with no English speaking family. They have so much more exposure to English than I had with my Italian growing up. Now that my kids are older, they prefer all movies in the original language, whatever that may be. They read in whichever language an item is in. We discuss things in the language that fits that subject. If we discuss US politics, it is in English. We discuss the newest BMW model that just came out, in German. And myself, I’m trying to get that Italian back.
Woah, I wrote a book. Sorry. I just wanted to add all teachers strongly encouraged bi or trilingualism. Not one ever said, you should focus only on German.
Wow that is super interesting! Neither of us grew up exposed to foreign languages this is all new territory for us. But you're right, the environment in which little ones grow up now and the exposure with technology really offers wonderful opportunities for language learning. On a funny note - before I moved to Germany and was living in the US (but I knew I was coming) I tried to watch Disney movies on Disney+ so that I could try to see how well I could understand it. Interestingly, their app doesn't automatically make all languages available. So for most movies, German wasn't an option (even for subtitles) but now that we live in Germany, Disney+ shows us both languages.
@@TypeAshton Maybe it is also a good thing not to overly theoreticize. Lets say there are many approaches and they all might work. In my opinion the idea having both parents do their respective native language seems best. But that does not work in your case. You just need to make sure that your speaking time in German is high enough to advance. Might well be that you cannot hold up speaking English to Jack all the time... I guess you/we 'll all have to wait and see
@@swabia1554 I agree. I did basic research, was aware of the various approaches and also how a bilingual child’s speech develops (language mixing is common) and just went with it. Also every child is so different. My older son spoke in full, long sentences in both languages from the start. My younger son took forever to put multi word sentences together but then a switch flipped and he preferred German ( like I English over Italian) but at 15 and 17 they are just fine. And their differences had nothing to do with bilingualism but rather their different personalities. My older son will still talk your ear off (like his mom ☺️)and my younger still quiet. Enjoy and have fun with Jack’s development.
I've been raised in French speaking countries (for 7 years) by German parents. The most interesting part was that my German differed from the other Kids German because it was "older". My parents didn't speak a lot of German when living abroad with anyone that lived in Germany so there German "froze in time" as opposed to the German spoken in Germany which always changes. To this day I actively use the Futur II and Plusquamperfekt, because my parents did. Those two timeforms somewhat died out in day to day German conversations at the beginning of the Millenium which is why most of the my friends my age don't really use that at all. I first noticed that in school, when all the kids were struggeling to form sentences in those forms and I wasn't. A few days ago a friend said: "Wir waren gewesen kann man nicht sagen, das heißt wir sind gewesen". So he uses those time forms so little that they even sound wrong to him even though they are technically correct. I highly doubt that that will happen to you though. Unlike my parents who were living in smaller African countries and had pretty much no contact to modern German you'll always be connected to modern English due to communicating with your family via Internet and English speaking media. It might happen with social trends though. Maybe everyone will always start petting the table before they start eating in America and everyone will look at you weirdly once you visit and don't do that because you didn't learn it in Germany. I actually don't see that difference as a negative point though. Working in the academic world means that I'm facing weird wordings on a daily basis so being used to that is actually an advantage. Generally speaking being billingual is pretty cool. I think it's even cooler if it's two languages other than English (no offense) because one will learn English anyway making those people that grew up with Turkish and German e.g. trilingual which is even cooler. My only advice is to look out for Jacks German in case you move back to America. It is uncreadibly easy to forget a language if you don't use it on a daily basis. My french was pretty much lost after a year of living in Germany after speaking it with all of my friends for 7 years as my first language. Don't make that mistake and always keep him in touch with German media.
I agree, languages evolve over time. I really learned English dub ing my stay abroad as an exchange student. The next four years I did not use it at all. During my study I read a lot and some of the documents were English, but I had hardly any usage of my speaking skills. Now in the times of YT I did have to learn lots of idioms to be able to talk and understand. And yes, I still use Plusquamperfekt
The German that will be spoken in our family is "froze in time" too, for we all have successfully completed a grammar school and afterwards we have realized our degree course. So our German will have little to do with this one spoken actually in this country.
As a Brit married to a German and living in Belgium, with two grown-up, bilingual (German/English) children, I can confidently say that you are on the right track! I am sure that the heritage language at home approach will work very well. We adopted the one parent, one language approach and were consistent about it and just let our children do their thing. We have the advantage that your mentioned of both speaking each other's language, so no-one was ever excluded from the conversation. I always spoke English to the children and their mother always spoke German. They understood both of us perfectly from the start, but at first spoke mainly German (Muttersprache!), with a bit of English (and French!) thrown in for good measure. I never insisted that they reply to me in English, but over time they began to speak more and more English until it began to seem strange to them to speak to me in German. It was a fascinating process. Don't worry if Jack speaks an alarming mishmash of English and German at first. It will sort itself out and will be a huge advantage for him later.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us! I really think this journey is going to be so fun and we are excited to see his language skills develop further. I think it is also super interesting for us to see how he begins to differentiate between the two. There are SO many words between English and German that sound extremely similar.
@@TypeAshton That is very true. It will be great fun. Do keep a notebook to jot down interesting (or funny) things that Jack says. It is a great way of keeping track of a bilingual child's linguistic development, and every parent should do it anyway so as not to forget the wonderful things their children say. I am very glad I did it now and my kids love to re-read it from time to time and have a good laugh!
Just wondering. Did you ever have the issue that the kids did not realize which language the was speaking outside of home? Personally I encountered the situation with Friends of mine whom have two bi/trilingual boys. Their kids sometimes have the issue that their kids reply or ask questions in Dutch or English to their Local teachers. Whom don’t speak Dutch or even are fluent in English. The boys did not realize that they where not speaking the correct language. Creating the situation that the kids sometimes get (very) frustrated. Was that not a issue? (Personally, I am kinda lucky just dealing with 14yr old… whom is determined to make me speak Spanish. He only speaks English to avoid his grandparents 😬)
@@huubjoanfranssen8980 We live in Brussels and our children both went to a French-speaking kindergarten (école maternelle) between the age of 3 and 6, as we wanted them to have some exposure to one of the host country's languages as well as their parents' native languages. (Adding Dutch as well would simply have been too much.) So they were faced with two languages at home and another outside the home. I don't think they had any difficulty accepting that there were (at least) three different ways of speaking (i.e. languages). For them it was simply how things were. Children are all different of course and our son found coping with three languages simultaneously rather more difficult than our daughter, partly because he was at the time suffering from undiagnosed hearing problems. Fortunately their kindergarten was used to dealing with children of many different nationalities and language backgrounds, and the teachers were not too fazed by the children's initial struggles with French. For a while our children's (or at least our daughter's) French was better than their English, although German was still dominant. At 6 they moved on to the German-language section of one of Brussels' international schools, where some subjects were taught in English, and French was taught as a foreign language. They ended up bilingual in German and English, with fluent but non-native-level French. It wasn't without its problems, but it was worth it in the end. The early stages of multilingualism seem chaotic but it does sort itself out over time!
@@TypeAshton This made me think of 'false friends'. When I was learning English I learned that "to allow" means "erlauben". Next thing I was asking somebody for an allowance, assuming that meant "Erlaubnis". We needed some time to sort that out ...
Thanks for the overview! Me and my siblings were raised by the second method. My parents enforced only speaking English at home, while speaking German outside of our home. Even though both my parents could speak both languages. I am so thankful that they made the effort, because Englisch comes natural to us, while living in Germany.
Dear BFF, you cannot imagine how much I envy your little one - for his gift to be raised bilingual ! This is such a big opportunity, it's truly amazing. I once was in Thailand, up in the northwest, where we stayed at a little resort which has been run by a thai-german family with two nice beautiful girls who came up to us when we had breakfast, starting a conversation in fluent perfect english, but as soon as they noiticed we spoke german with each other they switched immediateley to german as well, just instantly. As they both went to a thai school I'm sure they could also speak thai without any problem. And all this at an age of about maybe 10 years (the older one of the sisters), I was truly blown away by them... I guess your approach is the best for your son, to speak english with him at home while leaving him talking german up to his environment. It'll be so cool to accompany him on his journey, so please keep on posting your interesting videos !!!
That's so incredible! We are also thrilled to give Jack the opportunity to grow up bilingual. This is something we wish we could have done. Learning a foreign language as an adult is a very long and daunting endeavor.
Living in the USA, where languages are not valued at all, I brought up my daughter bilingually. Since my husband never learned German and the rest of his family was wondering why I even bothered, this was extremely difficult. I finally had some support when a German Saturday school opened and brought us into contact with likeminded people. Today, she speaks German fluently with an occasional grammatical error. My German nephew is totally bilingual because his parents spoke German exclusively at home after being transferred to the US. I taught at that Saturday school and experienced that children had no problem developing skills in two or three languages. Sometimes development was a bit delayed, but generally sorted before school age.
Hi, We have been having the same approach with our daughter (4,5yr) for the past 1,5 yr and so far results are very satisfying. We have moved from Poland to Austria in 2020, my daughter spoke basic polish at that time. She has been attending to bilingual KG (german+english) since the move and now she switches between polish, german and english depending on the person she speaks to. Recently we bought 10 sessions of speach therapy (one session every 1-2 weeks) to help her construct longer sentences in german and funny enough it has not only actually helped with german but also has imprved her polish. For me it is very interesting to see how it is all connect for her, and how things just have multiple names. Thank you for another great video. Best!
I'm dutch and my late husband was too. We moved to Miami Fl. When my daughters were nearly 5 and nearly 4. This was in May 1985. Immediately working on their English skills I enrolled then into summerschool and while driving them overthere I had those read a long books with a cassette tape...look at the pictures, turn the page when the bell sounds...and me translating simultaneously. Of course also a lot of sesame street and the electric company and Mr. Rogers ....by the time the schoolyear started they could function in English (Sept 1985). By first grade the were able to make the gifted programme. After 4 years back to the Netherlands...English was kept very active because dutch TV has all films and series in the original version with subtitles. And we provided them with English books series like "Black beauty" or "sweet Valley twins" Because we never ceased to talk to them in Dutch they were able to adapt seamlessly to dutch school. Now...my oldest...in the meantime 42 and living in Madrid is married to a guy from Iran and my grandson, turned 4 this week, is speaking 4 languages...no problem at all. FARSI with his dad and the Persian family, dutch with his mom and me, Spanish in school partially, street etc. and English...because of all the UA-cam videos like baby shark etc. Don't be afraid...it works out fine.
My best friend and his wife, both Germans, moved to Spain when their first daughter was one year old. Their second daughter was born in Spain. They only speak German at home and the girls went to Spanish schools and had Spanish and English friends. So the girls now speak all three languages fluently and switch without any effort. It just happened completely naturally. So my advice would be: don't overthink this. You basically would need to actively keep your child from learning a language it is exposed to.
I have met several people who grew up multilingual, several of whose only source of their native language was one of their parents, and they all ended up speaking both languages fluently. I think it's a great thing you're doing, and I'm absolutely certain that you don't need to worry about the outcome. Children are little learning machines, and he will easily achieve fluency in both languages if you provide him the opportunity.
As growing up being the child of a Flemish father and German mother, living in French speaking part of my country, I grew up being able to think in 3 different languages. This is for me the main point: the ability to think in any language, allows you to understand, speak and write in any language.
@@CrownRider from TV at first, and off course school, work. But once you got the hang of thinking in multiple languages, you do exact that with new languages you learn
@@bartleekens3026 I understand. I'm Dutch and I have attended trade shows, where I was asked to translate German into English and vice versa. At the end of the day you are thinking in both languages, but not your own. It takes a few days before you're back to normal, whatever that is.
While watching, I started to write several lenghty paragraphs about what I learnt about language acquisition while studying linguistics. And, yeah, you don't "learn" your native language, you *acquire* it... However, this was a well researched video and almost all objections I would have raised were mentioned. Very well done! Only some minor additions: Regarding the first approach you mentioned: the crucial point is that parents with different native languages are always consistent, i.e., they need to speak to *each other* in their respective native languages as well, at least while the child is within hearing distance. "Learning" any language (don't matter if native or foreign) via TV is generally a bad idea because it lacks interactivity. I also wouldn't recommend the third approach, at least not for L1: When linguists talk about the acquisition of language, they actually mean "determining the grammar of that language", i.e. gainig the capability to differenciate subtle judgements on grammaticality and semantics. For instance, native speakers know intuitively that "I know what Mary did" is okay, but "*I know that Mary did" is not, or why "Bob knows which picture of himself Charles posted after the conference" is ambiguous in a way that "Bob knows how proud of himself Charles was after the conference" is not. If the parents are not fluent in a language, they may not be able to use that language to a depth that would be necessary for the child to develop the ability to recognize those kind of subtleties. However, as an approach to learn a foreign language (i.e., a language learnt after a speaker's native langauge(s) is/are fully developed), this may work way better.
i am one of the kids growing up in a family that moved to other countries like you are now. ... as a small boy i picked up the local language easely playing with the local kids around the neighborhood , so after a year i was always taken by my mom to the market as a translator to the locals. this was before school so i could not read the language but spoke it as well as the children my age. we left this country after four years into another and after a few years another that my parents called home and i understood why. i met my grandparents and aunts and uncles. but what i am trying to say is i lost my first foreign language totally because i did not have a chance to use it. you are doing the right thing in speaking english at home. your child will pick up german at kindergarten and school so fast that you wont believe it, and he will be at home in both countries and maybe others to come lol
In our house (in Germany) it went like this with all of our kids, but most prominently with our 1st daughter because at the time at home only English could be heard: with around 3 and a half she started Kindergarten purely speaking English. 3 months later her German was better than her English and she started to request movies to be shown in German on TV. Hence my recommendation from my own experience: you can absolutely relax, in the end it will work out, no matter what you do. Just be yourself and don't make a science project out of it, your son will do it his way, no matter what empiric scientific findings say. He'll speak English and German naturally and intuitively. If you interfere to much you can only jinx it. All 3 of my kids speak perfect German and perfect English, despite never having lived longer in the US and despite basically zero effort of us lazy bones to worry about the issue in general. Just expect the typical phenomenons with real bilingual children. He will have grammatical, semantical and ethymological Germanisms in his English and Anglizisms in his German - meaning here and there native English only or German only speakers will hear some cute little glitches (like a persistent english subject, verb, object word order in a german subordinate clause). That's how it is. Not a lot you can do about it. I don't see it as a flaw, rather an asset: my kids have their own unique accent when they speak German and when they speak English.
I totally agree. Actually I love your point of view about it. German and English? Piece of cake (not the other way around, ie, being German parents in an English-speaking country). I strongly recommend your kids learning Spanish and French in the future. To me, anybody who speaks those 4 languages fluently (English, German, Spanish, French) deserves all my admiration.
@@enowilson Well once Jack enters secondary school he most likely is required to learn another foreign language (on top of English) anyways in order to be able to graduate from high school. In my case, which is the most common one nowadays I suspect, that was French (with many schools still offering Latin as another option) which was introduced in sixth grade (at about 11 years old). Often schools offer older students to pick up another foreign language in grade 10 (around age 15) which in my case was Spanish (but also can be Italian or even Greek or Hebrew sometimes). In that sense the German school system makes it easy to at least get a good foundation in all those languages. I was by no means fluent in Spanish when I finished high school but definitely so in English and French and refined my Spanish skills through stays abroad.
i think it‘s so great that Jack will grow up bilingual! in school I‘ve learned English (since the age of 8) and French (since the age of 12) but unfortunately I already start forgetting French grammar and structure… however, being bilingual offers so many possibilities not only in one‘s individual development but also when it comes to jobs. Great vid as always, keep going :)
Thanks so much! The gift of gab with multiple languages is SUCH a wonderful life skill. We are so excited for the opportunities that it will provide him.
I studied language, and I think the decision to mostly speak the language you are most proficient in with your child (if they are still very young and have enough exposure to the language it will need to understand in day to day life in a specific country) is a good one. Young childrens' brains are so much more flexible than we often give them credit for. And who knows, nothing is set in stone - my class in Grundschule had kids from many different nationalities, which meant a plethora of different languages when the parents came together, and by a certain age, the children were able to correct their parents' German. They knew the mother tongue of their parents well because it was what the parents used at home with them, and they knew German from pretty much every other aspect of everyday life, andmost of them were not confused by the differences, but enjoyed explaining them to others. There are perhaps as many different approaches to this as there are families. And may I just say, your "Was ist das?" was accent-free :)
Usually when parents speak the foreign language with their kids, the kids pick up a very heavy accent. I think that speaking the mother tonque at home is absolutely the right approach as the chances are high that the kids can then speak both languages free of any accent. Jack will learn german in school and from friends while learning english at home.
Again, another awesome, informative, and instructional video! While I commented on the last two videos in German I thought it might be better to write in English today as more of your followers will be able to read it. It came to me the last time that while I was writing my comment primarily for you there is a whole community out there that also reads comments, at least occasionally. So, I'm writing in English today! I found your research into the various methods of raising a bilingual child very interesting and it brought up many memories for me. First, a bit about my own background: I was born in Hamburg, Germany. When I was two years old my family moved to Italy where I would spend by childhood (1963-1971). I went to one of the six European Schools (each member country of the "European Common Market" back then - Germany, France, Italy, Belgium, Netherlands, and Luxembourg - had one European School). I went to Pre-K, Kindergarten, and 1-4th Grade there. Then, when I was 11 years old we moved back to Germany. That's where I spent my teenage years and my early twenties. Then I moved to the United States, got married and had kids. As you can see from this life journey, I can relate in various different ways to your research: My own experience in Italy and returning to Germany: Since we were a fully German family living in Italy we only spoke German in the house. My parents were themselves in the process of learning Italian. My early expose was mostly to German at home but to Italian when I went with my mom to the market or other stores. When it was time for me to enter Pre-K at the European School I was enrolled in the German group. So I continued to have German as my predominant language at home and in school. The following year, in Kindergarten, I was placed in the French group. Now I was exposed to German at home, French in school, and Italian in the school yard and in town. When I got to first grade I was in my German homeroom for the core subjects (Reading, Writing, Math, etc), we had French as our second language (taught by a teacher from Paris), and subject such as Sports, Music, or Art the kids from the various language groups were mixed up together with the subject taught in the mother tongue of the teacher. So, besides having kids speaking all various mother languages I had Sports in Italian, Music in French, and Art in Dutch. In the school yard everything was Italian, of course. And I spoke Italian with the kids in our neighborhood when we played together outside the home. This continued through my fourth grade when we moved back to Germany. What did that do to my language learning? Overall, I was exposed to multiple languages all at once when children absorb languages the best. I learned German with no problem (except for some vocabulary that our family adopted in Italian, and which I didn't learn in German until we moved back when I was eleven). I learned both Italian and French quite well for speaking and normal conversation. I only started learning reading and writing in Italian and French in third grade. The philosophy of the school was to raise us kids as European citizens who would be comfortable in all the main language of Europe (at the time, the U.K. and English was not part of that). I suppose, if we had stayed in Italy and I had continued at the European School through 12th grade I would have become fully fluent in all three languages. But moving back to Hamburg, Germany, when I was eleven left me stuck on the level of an 11-year-old in Italian and French. Back in Germany I actually felt a bit out of place because I was used to speaking German only at home and in school. It was strange to speak German even in the street or at the store. And I had to catch up with some German vocabulary that I had known only in Italian. I actually never learned any curse words in German. I only knew curse words in Italian. In school in Germany, starting in fifth grade, I had Latin as foreign language. Knowing Italian was great as it was easy to learn Latin vocabulary. In 7th grade I finally got English too, which I hated and didn't want to learn... famous last words! But I started to loose my Italian a bit. French got a boost when it was added as a subject in school in 9th grade. So, today, I am fully fluent in German, and I feel competent enough in Italian and French to get around in Italian and French speaking environments. I don't feel fully competent writing in Italian or French but it only takes me a few days to get back into it when I'm in those environments. When I hear or speak Italian I feel home! Raising my children in the United States: Today, I wish I had insisted more on speaking German to them when they were little. My wife was American who didn't speak German. Even though I was still in the process of fully learning English when I first came to the United States (1985) I quickly caught on. With my wife we spoke English exclusively. When the kids were born we only spoke English. I would only occasionally speak German with them when I put them to bed. I would sing German night-time songs to them until they fell asleep. And I would sometimes read German children's books to them. But pretty soon, in daily living, when I did speak German with them, they would say, "Papi, speak English!" When family came to visit from Germany I would, of course, speak German with them (which gave the kids some idea of what a German conversation could sound like) but everyone in my family also knew how to speak English so no one here in the U.S. had to try and speak German. My daughter really doesn't speak any German these days. She got enamored with Japan and now lives there as an English teacher learning Japanese. I'm trying to catch up with learning a bit of Japanese. My son did try to learn German on a few occasions. He is actually trying to speak sometime but is still quite rudimentary. He could probably pick up on it fairly quickly if he had a chance to live in Germany. In retrospect, I wish I had asserted myself a bit more to speak German more often with the children. But it was hard when everything else surrounding was only English. I think, that a number of the methods you mentioned in the video came through in my story, except that there wasn't really any method to any of my or my children's exposure. I would say that there was definitely a method employed by the European School in Italy, which would have been great if I had stayed at that school all the way to 12th grade. Some of my friends from that time are absolutely versatile in German, Italian, French, English, and Spanish. Again, thank you for your great video. I hope my story was interesting and might have shed some light on the topic.
Wow what a wonderfully cultured experience you and your family has had in life! Your education sounds a lot like the French-German school which is here in Freiburg. We tried to look and see if there were any German-English schools in our area, but all we found was a private boarding school in the high Black Forest. From where we are today, I think it will probably work best if Jack is in a normal public school or a music school (depending on his interests). We hope that he picks up French as well since we love so close to the Alsace region. ❤️ Again, thank you for sharing your story with us!
@@TypeAshton Thank you for taking the time to read my long post. Yes, I agree that living in Freiburg you probably don’t want to go too far out of your way for Jack’s schooling. Sounds like a regular local German school would be the best choice. If I had gone to an Italian school I would definitely have learned Italian more deeply than I have. I seemed to remember that there is a European School in Karlsruhe, but while that’s not too far from you it would definitely be too far for send a young child to school. If you are more interested in the concept of the European School here’s a pretty good write-up about them on Wikipedia: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/European_School . I wish you the best in finding the best situation for Jack!
My wife and I have lived in Germany for over 30 years.My wife speaks French and English is my native language.When our children were small we never spoke German to our kids,we both spoke our seperate languages to them.They had no problems learning English, French and German.We worked in a Occupation where our colleagues came from all over the planet.It was noticeable that parents who were not native German speakers passed their imperfect German onto the kids.Up to about the age of 9 or 10 the 2 older children would only communicate with my wife in French and with me in English. German was something they just did without even thinking. As they got older they start talking to us in German, which I would say is their first language.Our youngest daughter however somehow picked that up from them would only converse with us in German when she was small.All of our kids speak and write all 3 language and it is quite normal that our conversations could jump threw all of these lauguages at the dinner table.I think you guys heading in the right direction. Jack's German skills will outpace yours in a remarkable short time.
Yes! We are noticing this too. We were really concerned that our "bad habits" with speaking German would negatively affect Jack. Of course, we are still continuing to improve our German - but we don't want to set up him from an early age with imperfect grammar. I think the best way forward for us to to keep speaking English and his school/community will help foster his German language skills.
@Afri- dancer "parents who were not native German speakers passed their imperfect German onto the kids" Yes, so it can happen that the (especially young) children have more difficulties in the local language, just BECAUSE the parents, try (!) to talk to them in the local language. Hopefully this is not (anymore) recommended.
@@rrbth-handball-rules I think it was done with good intentions, people were less informed and desperate to integrate their families into German life.It still worked out for those kids though.Just like their parents they all moved on to have great lives.
While I can see your concerns I think at the beginning it is totally recommendable not to try an imperfect language on the kids. First because they learn something wrong and have to correct it. And as a second concern you as parents will develop your skills of the foreign language over time. So the later you start to also communicate in the foreign language the less errors you make and the less the kids get wrong examples. But, and I think that goes along with the two languages method, once the basics are in and a social environment of native speakers has formed the kids will learn to differentiate between parent's German and German's German. Just as they know the languages apart. And that will help them to learn that there is not one German with one sound. Even if not the correct one. That is an early exposure to the fact that nothing is perfect. I noticed that when I learned French in 10th grade at Gymansium (the German one). It was my third foreign language. First year we had one teacher. I got used to her pronunciaton. Next year another teacher. Took me some time to get used to his pronunciation. I think it was a good thing because we learned the variations. It was then easier to adopt to other speakers.
Hi Black Forest Family, I am a foreigner, my wife is a German. I already spoke about four or five languages before I moved to Germany more than a decade ago(without a German word at age around 25). Once I moved here, I went to a Volkhochschule and learned German for three straight months, 5 hours a day. I enrolled in a University and took German language full-time. A year after, I spoke in German fluently and about a year and a half, I could write in German grammars, went on to do postgraduates and find work before my studies officially completed. My two kids are fluent in both German and English, as I continued to speak with them in English all throughout the years since their birth. They are in Gymnasiums and taking up a third language in school. The point I wanted to contribute is, you do not have to care so much about Jack's German language skills. He will, either way, have both English and German his native language. The challenge is on both of you, and Jonathan. You continue to support Jack in his English skills, while do as much as you could to better your German language. Jack will be happy about this later when he will realize that you are learning the language he internally fully mastered as provisioned for by his interaction with the German environment since early age - he will perhaps correct your German skills at some stage lol..! (°_*). His brain is naturally evolving and adapting to German language and language's environment. This is my own experience with my kids (10 and 15 years respectively). Learning languages is fun ;-)
Both my parents spoke English to each other (and that was for them their 3rd language) and the only one they had in common, and I grew up with a rather funny English at home in a Spanish speaking environment. Mum found a bilingual school for me. I heard her speaking German with the dogs and on CB radio. I also learned a few rhymes and songs in German without really knowing what they meant. Emigrated to USA at 13. Then emigrated to Austria at 24, and when our child arrived, we decided to follow my parents example and speak English at home. Her first multi- word sentence at 14 mo. was mixed: "aber, I want some" 🙂. Eventually there was a lot less mixing. I also bought books, music cassettes and videos that were in English (expensive way back then) and found an English play group for one afternoon a week. Funny enough the children all spoke German to each other in the play group but when they spoke to us parents, it was in English. It was very important for me to emphasize English in every day activities so that she could speak to our family with no hesitation. We couldn't afford the private bi-lingual school at that time, but if we could, I would have sent her there. Some of my friends said their children stopped speaking to them in English as soon as they realized mom or dad could soeak German anyway, so why bother... But for some, at school, their English came back and they began to use it at home again. Now our daughter tutors children and adults in English.
Ok, here we go. I'm an American Ex-Pat, now Swiss citizen. My wife is a born and raised Swiss from the city of Bern. As you know, each town/regio has it's own sub-dialect of Swiss German. We met, married and started our family in the Basel area. And since she doesn't like English, we only speak Hochdeutsch with each other. Our boss at the time at the Musik-Akademie der Stadt Basel is married to an American and she had just finished her PhD dissertation at the Univeristy of Basel as a linguist. Her dissertation was on bilingual families and how to raise bilingual kids. She said, the we should only speak our native tongue with the kids and not in our adopted language. That meant, that the kids would grow up hearing and then speaking Basel dialect with friends, speaking and hearing Bern dialect with my wife and English with me. My wife and I only speak Hochdeutsch with each other. You could make a case, that the kids were growing upquadrlingually = English, Hochdeutsch, Berndeutsch, Baseldeutsch. All went well strictly following her advice, and it helped that I was a 50% stay-at-home Dad and my wife "only" worked 50% also. It was also clear, that the kids were not thrilled with speaking English with Dad, but we perservered and they had to stick it out. Then came the first trip to visit my mom in San Francisco. And there it happened: "David, get out of the street, a car's coming". DAVID, GET OUT of the STREET, a CAR'S coming!!!" David, raus aus der Strasse, es kommt ein Auto!!" That was when the kids "learned" that Dad could and would speak German with them if they toughed it out. Fast forward ... My son graduated from University in Lausanne. So he did his undergraduate and then later graduate degree in French. He met and married his now wife, who is Iranian from Teheran and they live in Geneva. They speak English with each other, although she can now speak French. My daughter, after graduating from Gymnasium, where she'd done an English Immersion course of study, did a 6 month stay in New Zealand where she met (her first) love of her life, a young man from Japan and they only spoke English with each other. But alas, that didn't work out. She's now an MD, married to a Chemist who is bilingual French/Spanish inasmuch as his parents are from Spain. They're bringing up their kids bilingually Baseldeutsch/Spanish. Both kids hear Hochdeutsch, as is usual in school, even if that school is Kita and Kinski. My wife and I only speak Berndeutsch/Hochdeutsch with them when we babysit them. We sometimes ask them what something is in Spanish. They speak Spanish with their Dad and with their grandparents from Fribourg when they visit with each other. French is, for now, a "Geheimsprache" (secret language) between my daughter and her husband. That'll work until they start French in elementary school as is customary here in Baselland. So the linguist was only partly right. It turns out with us, with our kids and our grandkids, the kids can hear all sorts of languages and they'll sort it out themselves. Both our kids profited from the time I took speaking only English as both speak and understand decent English. Not quite bilingually. About as bilingual as I am after 46 years in Switzerland. Meaning: fluently, but not quite perfectly. I bet your kids will have a better grip on English because you both are English native speakers - different than in our case.
BTW - both kids ran into trouble in public schools, inasmuch as only British English was taught there at the time and they got stuff marked "wrong" when it was American English. "Do you have a pencil?" was marked wrong. "Have you got a pencil?" was what was expected. This changed for my daughter, when she did her English Immersion at Gymnasium.
I was born in 1961. Both my parents were Dutch and yet I'm almost fluent in English and I also speak German and some French. The reason why so many (over 90 percent) of Dutch people are able to speak English is because of our tv broadcasting system. All series, documentaries and movies are broadcast in the original language with Dutch subtitles. Because the vast majority of foreign tv programs in the Netherlands come from English speaking countries, Dutch children are confrontend with the English language from a very early age. Speaking English isn't a problem. The only thing is I don't do that very often in everyday life. As a result it sometimes takes me longer to form my phrases correctly or to find a specific word from memory. A typical case of 'use it or loose it'. That's why I watch and react to English spoken youtube videos. In the Dutch highschool curriculum English is mandatory. Our Dutch highschool system consists of several levels. In the middle and high level, besides English, a second foreign language is also mandatory. This has to be German or French. Of course outside the curriculum there's the opportunity to learn more languages voluntariliy.
I am English but have lived in the Netherlands for 35 years and so I speak Dutch during this time I have worked in Germany for 15 years while still living in the Netherlands and so speak German also, my partner is Dutch (Fries) she speaks Dutch Fries and German, her son speaks Dutch, and English most of which he has learned from the internet so it is more American, but not German; his girl friend is German and does not speak Dutch but does speak a different form of English to him. I can speak German but have not done so in this century colloquially. Christmas when the family came together was somewhat eventful as some of us lost the ability to think in the language which we were either listening to or speaking at that point before switching to the next - alcohol does not help
i wish this also were the fact in germany. My passive english is quite good, but my active english (writing..speaking) is another thing. Ok..an addon point is, that i am born as a guy who isn't good in languages..even in my own language. But the TV thing would be a good thing in germany too. I once was in nepal, meet an old guy. He spoke a very good german. He sold postcards and learned it through the contact with tourists..unbelievable. Another guy (also nepal ) told me, he learned his english as he watched tv cartoons :) But the most impressed thing was a chinese math prof. He had his job in china and learned german in 3 month in the evening. Imagine..beeing a math prof ...and learning german in the evening after a hard day. He spoke a very..very good german. But i think he was an alien. He was so ingredible intelligent.
I am always amazed how well the dutch speak english. However, I think it is very important as well to safeguard and preserve the dutch language and culture. Doesn't need to be as extreme as the french do it, but when it's aout identity and all that it's really important.
That’s the way I learned Dutch. 😉 Growing up near Cologne we were able to get Dutch TV. While watching US TV shows in English I learned Dutch via the subtitles. and
Sehr gutes Video über dieses interessante Thema! Ich glaube, ihr habt die richtige Methode gewählt, weil sie am besten auf eure Situation passt. Leider kann ich keine eigenen Erfahrungen beitragen, da wir England bzw. Frankreich verlassen haben, als unser Sohn gerade anfing zu sprechen, aber in den ersten zwei Jahren haben wir zuhause auch nur deutsch gesprochen, weil wir wussten, dass unser französisch zu schlecht war, um dies als Grundlage für die Sprachentwicklung unseres Sohnes nehmen zu können. Ich wünsche euch viele gute Erfahrungen in dieser Hinsicht und bin gespannt, wie Jack reagiert, wenn er mal keine Lust hat, englisch zu sprechen, weil er weiß, dass ihr auch deutsch versteht.
Such a gift to be raised bilingual! It's incredible how much our thoughts are formed, restricted, and directed by the words available to us through our language. Jack's lucky to have great parents giving him such a wonderful start!
Hi Ashton, I absolutely loved your video - it was super informative! 😊 Since the video is all about language, I thought I’d point out something I noticed: you say "for Jonathan and I" a few times, but the correct phrase is actually "for Jonathan and me." That’s because "me" is the object form of the pronoun, which you need after a preposition like "for." A good way to check is to drop "Jonathan" and see what sounds natural - you’d say "for me," not "for I." Hope that’s helpful! 😊 Keep up the amazing work, your content is fantastic! 🙌
I was raised trilingual- in Australia, English at school, and Kroatien and German at home. It was never exclusive, at home both languages were spoken „ Kreuz und quer“. You can imagine that it was sometimes hard and weird…🙈
In the Netherlands most schools offer multiple language classes besides our native language (German French and English) but also more and more schools are starting English at a younger age (basisschool I believe). Being bilingual is a great asset and passing that on to our children is a great gift. Thank you for making this video full of great information
There is also a French-German school in Freiburg (and I believe a private boarding school somewhere near by that focuses on English). We are looking forward to Jack being exposed to so many different languages and cultures from such a young age. Thanks for watching the video! We are so glad you enjoyed it.
@Black Forest Family to be fair, you make great videos on so many great subjects and for some reason getting a real "outsider" view of countries (I.e. not from a native) is so much more informative. The only "negative" I can find with your channel is that you selected the wrong country to move to, but then again the Netherlands and Germany are nearly indistinguishable on a world map 😉 Looking forward to your next video.
Funny enough, we actually travel to the Netherlands often for Jonathan's work (typically Enschede or Amalo). It is so wonderful living in Europe and having so many different countries just a (relatively) short drive away!
Great video, thanks a lot, it was fun t watch. As a German, living in the bilingual city of Brussels with a partner who is originally Hungarian our future kids will have to deal with 5 languages (and it certainly doesn't help to shorten that list that we speak English at home, as her Dutch and my French are not that great yet).What helps us is that we have a lot of other couples where the kids are exposed to a greater number of languages around us, so hopefully we can pick up tricks where needed here and there. To be fair, living in a place where language isn't as much a monlithical thing as Germany or the US we might have an advantage as well, there should be less cases of bullying or people thinking it is weird (and I happened to have friends my age who grew up in similair situations in Brussels 20 years ago, so we might even be able to draw on their experiences as well).
Hey to you three. First - thank you for all of your well-researched Videos including sources and opinions stated clearly out. Myself was raised trilingual - Greek, Italian and German. Back in the Days around the 90s the approach was that at home also the parents need to talk German. Hearing what you said I am happy that My parents didn’t follow it fully. My mum spoke Italian with me - my dad spoke Greek with me so I was able to communicate fluently with all the people around. But I can also say that it made a lot of things easier once my mum learned Greek besides her Italian mother tongue. She was able to communicate also in Greek within the family nucleus. Long story short the ability to get new language it somehow become type of my DNA. But still today I need everytime some days of getting all my language skills back when I am for example in Greece or Italy but our brain is a powerful piece of evolutionary engineering. It will not forget a language but bring everything back in the “daily-use” part of our brain so we can access easier. Same thing when I started my job back in the days for a sole English speaking company. It took me a while to get everything I learned in school back in my brain but once my brain accepted this fact it was easy to improve everything. So yes apparently I can confirm all the scientific research that you did and I also can tell you that your effort is amazing and that finally you don’t need to be scared for what might come. It is very helpful to know different languages and it makes it easier to adapt to new cultures. But there is one caveat on that point which I see in myself. Depending which language I speak to some extend my own character on views on things may slightly vary. Example - Mediterranean slow life vs. German high productivity. Here you may see big variations when I think about a problem or solution in German or in Italian/Greek. Anyway thanks again for this good content. Keep doing what you doing
That is SO cool. Our good friends are raising their daughter to speak Lithuanian, Dutch and German and it is SO amazing to see little ones take on languages so easily. It will undoubtably be a wonderful skill to have in the future. It sounds like your language environment was so enriching.
My experience is that you should talk with your child in your mother tongue, as you would not teach mistakes you are prone to in foreign languages. I am German, but my wife comes from Vietnam. We talk to the children in our mother tongue only, but my wife and me communicate in english. As the school language is also english, my children grew up with 3 languages, which they all master. Difficulties arose only, when the vocabulary in one language did not yet include a representation in the other languages. I discovered, that German language does contain many more words then English or Vietnamese. Always interesting to work this out :-)
Hi Ashton, as always, a very well researched and well presented video. After a minute or so, I thought (not for the first time) you really should teach at university, and what a loss it would be if you didn't. Well, given how hard the German system makes it for people to enter that career, it's sad that it probably won't happen. But still... On another note, at the end, when you showed the books, I wondered if you aren't overdoing it a bit. When I see a book about child development that has the word "optimizing" in it, the alarm bell starts ringing. Such a title implies a very American thinking, and it raises images in my head of prenatal music courses, a rigorous schedule of preschooling, a full calendar of courses here and courses there, and helicopter parents that drown their children in pressure. Now, I'm generalizing unduely, of course, and you are surely quite self-reflecting and probably won't fall into that trap so easily. But what I actually want to say is this. You can't plan everything, and though it is typical for first time parents to try ;-), it will all just work out quite naturally. Jack will learn both languages natively, whether you follow any of theses guides or not. With the second child, you will be much more relaxed, and they'll turn out perfectly fine. That's an experience parents have made from the beginning of time. :-) Take care!
Thank you for this very interesting, informative, and well researched video. The only advice I can offer you, is to not put too much pressure on yourself. It will work out in the end. I myself am bilingual, my mom is German and my dad is American and I grew up on both continents, however my son is growing up in Germany and my husband is German. So when our son was small, we practiced method one: Me & my dad spoke exclusively English with him and my husband & his family spoke German and the Kita spoke German as well. Every book we read or tv show we watched however was only in English, even my husband read him books in English. Our kiddo understood both languages without any trouble, but he spoke only German. At around age 1 1/2 his language skills kicked in and he had a best friend at Kita. Turns out, the other little boy had the same bilingual learning experience growing up, his mom is a Brit, and he also only spoke German. However they quickly caught on that they could use English as a secret language when at Kita. For instance when they saw an opening at the Playmobil Burg, they would whisper “castle” to each other and race there to get the free spot, before any of the other kids caught on. When he started German school, I started to speak in both languages with him. For me, family life is just easier if you speak the language of the land you live in (in other words,I got lazy). Fast forward, he is 17 now and my son is fluent in both languages. English is not as dominant because he learned reading and writing in English at German school starting in 5th grade, but he has no trouble switching between languages and adapting easily when in situations with people who only speak one of both languages. He is also a fairly decent translater between the two. It also helps that his complete media intake (UA-cam ,TikTok, Animes, playing video games online with people all over the world, and whatever else he does) is all in English. With such caring and thoughtful parents, your son will grow up learning the languages of both worlds in no time. It is an invaluable gift, at least in my experience as it has been, that you are giving your son and I applaud you for putting in the extra effort to do so.
so glad you enjoyed the video! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! We totally agree, the exposure to so many languages is such a wonderful gift. We are so excited for him.
We mowed from Germany to Norway when my kids were 5 and 7 a long time ago. In the beginning we where speaking German at home and Norwegian outside the home. eventually one teacher said "let the kids always speak the language they are most comfortable with.". We used that approach from then on. Each of them came home one day and spoke Norwegian to oss. They did it ever since. Today we speak Norwegian each other and to our kids and German when German people are around. And English if necessary. Another question. Why do you Americans keep calling your selv expats? you are immigrants to Germany.
Very nice video. We went through the first and second strategy with our children (especially with the older one). My wife is Czech, I am Slovak, the languages are quite simillar but not the same. Kids were born in Czechia, so we started with the first strategy, me speaking exclusively Slovak to them, my wife exclusively Czech, and by the age of 2 the older one was able to speak both languages and even switching them seamlessly according to whom he was speaking to. Then, when boys were not yet 4 and 2, we moved to the German speaking part of Switzerland (actually quite close to you, just next to Basel), and as the older one was about to start to go to kindergarten, we got the advice to use the second (the Heritage language) strategy. And it worked very well (eventually, there were some hiccups of course), they are now (after almost 10 years here in Switzerland) fluent in Czech, Slovak, High German and Swiss German, as well as very good at French (taught in school) and English (taught in school, too, but exposed to it at home, as we have been watching English TV channels at home from the beginning, because my wife wasn't speaking any German when we moved here). So I strongly believe rising your kids bilingual can help them to become multilingual eventually, as I know some other bilingual families, and for their kids learning a new language is usually quite easy.
Wow that is AMAZING. That is so impressive. One of the things we love so much about living in Germany is the exposure to languages that Jack will experience. It is so different from the environment in which we were raised.
Thank you so much Ashton for discussing this topic. I will be sharing this one with my Aussie daughter who moved to Germany just over a year ago to be with her British boyfriend living in Germany . She is in what I call a modern family situation. Her boyfriend has a daughter that is German born and is bilingual in English and German . I wonder which method was used in her early years prior to school. Thank you for the references as well, this is definitely worth giving some serious thought to. I’d better brush up on my German phrases too in readiness for my bilingual grandchildren ha! ha! danke und eine schöne woche. so schön, den kleinen Jack wiederzusehen ( I cheated lol 😂) not that clever……yet!
Hi Ashton, I assume that because of your scientific background, you approach the topic of bilingualism very rationally. You have informed yourself about the different methods and weighed up the respective pros and cons. What more could you want? I have a good feeling that you found the optimal method for Jack.
I was a stay at home English speaking mother to our now 22 year old son (my husband is German). We used approach 1. When he started Kita with 3, he would tell me about his day in German. New experiences that maybe he didn't have an English vocabulary for?? At pre-teen he stopped talking English with me. I still spoke only English to him (still do) and he usually answers in German. But somewhere late teens it became "cool" to speak English and he uses it with his German friends as well. Now as a young adult, he reads English books most of the time, and speaks fluently. My Canadian relatives say they can hear a slight German accent/tone fall when he speaks but I think that is quite understandable. I think your biggest challenge will be the balance with your German.
Wow this was SUPER interesting to read! Thank you so much for sharing your story. We also wondered how Jack's view of speaking English over time will change (whether it is 'cool' or not). We are also interested to see whether or not he will develop an accent (I kind of think he will). I read once that kids learn dialect from their friends, not their family. Which kind of makes sense because my cousin grew up in New York and has a thick NYC accent, even though his mom does not. It will be interesting to se how his language skills progress!
@@TypeAshton 😄My son speaks perfect Hochdeutsch and only switches to Badisch when he wants to bug me since he knows I have problems - still - understanding Dialekt.
I am always impressed. You pick up a topic in get into it so deep, structured and in a scientific way. It seems to be your habbit, to learn and understand each topic to the max possible way. And yes, kids learn foreign language very fast in Kita, school, with other kids,... in a natural way. It's quite natural for them and no "work".
I‘m also thrilled for Jack. These days, even if you would move back to America, he (and you) can keep the language fresh by watching films. That’s what I do with Italian. And absolutely, perfect English spoken at home and perfect German in his out of home environment is … well perfect 👍 I‘ve often wondered if my husband should speak German or English if we had a child, and I think German so that the language absorbed is correct. This has been my favourite video apart from when you said you finished your PhD!
Great video, and some great thoughts and tips! Before we moved over here to Germany, we decided to use the "Heritage" language approach. Our four kids are learning German in the schools and in our city, but we wanted to make sure that they maintain and use their English skills as well. I feel the hardest thing for me is that I don't know how good my kids' German skills really are! I know they are doing well because of their schooling (and the older ones can get around in the city and shop and all of that), but it's strange not hearing them speak German. And I agree that it's hard not being able to practice our own German in our house - I have to make sure I continue to make opportunities to speak with my German friends in German to get that extra practice!
We are also SUPER curious what it's going to be like once Jack starts reading/writing in German. One of our good friends from the US posted a funny picture of their son's journaling (funny because there are some cute misspellings due to phonetics) - it is going to be a whole different deciphering puzzle for us to understand his German. 😂
@@TypeAshton add to that the fact that (at least here in Leipzig) they make the kids write in cursive, reading some of the homework has been an adventure!
My sister (German) has married a Spanish man and moved to Norway for good when their son turned two. My Sister spoke German to him, my brother-in-law Spanish, and his friends obviously Norwegian. My sister and her husband arbitrarily switched between Spanish and German. So little Axel grew up with three languages, actually with four, since English is a major school subject in Norway - and he struggled. He started late to speak at all, and he always had problems to express himself. He is now in his twenties and a successful IT-programmer in Norway, but up to this day he has problems expressing himself in German, Spanish or English, his language of choice obviously is Norwegian, and since I can't speak Norwegian I can't assess his eloquence in that language. If you want to raise your son bi-lingual, I definitely would support the heritage approach. Don't bother about reading and writing, he will learn that in school very well. The disadvantage of this approach is, that you yourself will not really master German ever. To achieve this, you need to make German your first language, and with the heritage approach you won't do that. As soon as you start speaking German at home, Jack will not learn English on a native basis. The question is, if that is really a missed chance. He still will grow up with some English around him and most likely always be better in English classes in school than his class mates. He will be very good in English as his second language, but not really bi-lingual in the sense, that he will speak English truly as well as German. The question is - is being able to speak English as a second language really good not enough?
As a German/Dutch family, living in Germany. We speak Dutch, my mother tongue, at home since my husband speaks a pretty good Dutch. It is our family language, only when German speaking people are with us, we do speak German. Our children learned German from opa and oma, school etc. When they were still little, we went to the US for nearly one year. They went to school and kindergarten and learned english. In this year we didn't speak German, but when we came back they picked it up right away. Our daughter of 7 even changed her German handwriting to American and coming back she used the German again. Since this time in the US english was a third language in our family and I have to be honest, we do mix up the languages sometimes. Later we moved, we lived close to the Dutch border and our children all studied in english at the Dutch universities. Our youngest went after 4 year Grundschule to the 5th class of a Dutch primary school which is six years. It is true, they could speak Dutch, could read it, but writing was more difficult. Now they are adults they can write Dutch, but I still need to correct them sometimes, but it is no problem. They are so thankful that we raised them tri-langual. It is one of the best gifts you can give your child. ☺.My advice: just relax, sometimes the language our child speaks looks a little 'messy', and maybe it looks like Jack is 'behind' in its language development but at the end it will work out well. Children are so flexible!
I'm speechless. what an effort to read and learn all those things. i am an elementary school teacher in a poor part of town. you can find people who are living here for 30 y and more, but they can't speak or understand german very well. my students are from everywhere, only two are germans. some of them can't comunicate at all. they all live in germany for a few hours a day, they don't need the language and some will never learn. your very intellectual approach is rarely to be found, I only have one set of parents in my class with a university level of education. they do so much for their son, visiting sites and museums and zoos. others rarely do that. with a heavy heart I wish you could adopt them all and show them the way to live a better life. your son is a lucky guy.
-flawlessly, without any hiccups or problems. Now we use as a form of therapy and he is reading the newspapers in both languages and books. He has improved verbally, reading and his writing is normal in his native language and have spelling issues in the other but his english spelling issues are words that sounds the same but spelled differently (example:meet & meat ) that kind of thing. Knowing more than one language could delay deterioration in dementia and Alzheimer's disease. I think the reason why is you are using your brain more, by more I mean differently, like an old fashioned switch with a string you pull on. When you are speaking your native language there's no effort because it's natural reflex for you but you switch to another language, it's like yanking on the string light. It takes effort and forces you to use your brain in a different way and switching often ( every other paragraph of a conversation), keeps not only working more but keeping it sharp. That is our family's hope anyway. So far so good. Who knows?it might be a key that leads somewhere or just delaying it. At this point we take what we can get. I love being trilingual and my hope to learn another.
So we're also an English speaking family with a different community language, and we also speak just English at home, with most of the kids' second language exposure being from school and the community. My kids are older, though (primary school age), so we've relaxed some aspects. We definitely take part in conversations in the local language together when there are locals who don't speak English present. Eg neighbouring kids, at the doctor - although many of these do speak English - etc. We also started reading to the kids in both languages, not just English, for vocabulary and to promote both as fun to read. The vocab was particularly relevant relatively early. We realised that our kids were missing a lot of "home" vocab in the local language, (and honestly so were we) so we particularly looked out for kids vocab books locally on everything from kitchen appliances to body parts. It's important for a child to be able to describe their body accurately to the doctor if they have a pain, or hopefully never in the case of assault, thus a bilingual child needs to know how to say "waist", "ribs", "ankles", private parts etc in both languages.
Wow. What an efford. What a lot of background work, scientific research. I somehow felt like listening to a well structured scientific lecture at a university. Chapeau, Ashton. Let me tell you for sure: Jack will be fluently in both languages, German and English, and he will distinguish between how to address people more or less "without thinking" - see his first sentence. He just noticed instinctively that he had to address his nanny in German because she only speaks German with him. Let me tell you a good example: Some friends of us have the following situation: He is German, she is a late patriate from Russia who came to Germany at an age of 12. Her parents, however, can't speak German very well and therefore stick to Russian. Their 3 children speak only Russian with their grandparents, they switch between Russian and German speaking with their mother and speak only German with their father. Outside their family they of course use German with the side effect that this is now their mother tongue and they can speak Russian pretty well but not write it due to the Cyrillic alphabet. Speaking only English at home will manifest the awareness in Jack that you are American and the rest of the world is different. And he soon might trick you using German if he doesn't know the English word for something. So, to sum it up, I guess something like the "Everyone participates" method is the right one to help Jack being bilingual and you as parents as well to improve your command of German. Anyway, I know you will do the right thing. I love your channel.
My English teachers wife is French. They have two kids. They have come up with a "Language rule" - two days a week they speak English, two days French, two days German. And on Sunday everyone has his own choice of language. :)
That is super interesting! I bet that is a really fun and interactive way to practice language skills. Perhaps when Jack is older and English is well established we can switch to something like this so Jonathan and I can work on our German skills.
@@TypeAshton But as the language of the school will gradually predominate, you may need to compensate more in your maternal language. I've personally experiment that, my kids avoiding to reply in English to their father and choose to speak to me instead in french. He impose a new rule, only speaking English at home when it's only us. They even had to speak to me in English, but I replied in french ( never spoke English with my husband and with them and my husband spoke only french to me). We had a motorized satellite dish, so we could watch British TV, they watch very few french kids TV. They still have the habit to choose to watch films in original version. Very practical this satellite dish ! When they grow up and learn German at school, I even choose sometimes the Kika channel ! 😆
I was born in Germany. In 1952 my father took a job in Argentina. The family, my father my mother, myself (age 8), my brother (age 6) and my baby brother (age 3) spoke no Spanish. Arriving in Argentina, we had several weeks of basic language training to be able to get by. My father was working with some other Germans so at least he had the opportunity to communicate outside the family. My mother and we children did not have that opportunity. My mother was teaching herself Spanish with the help of our Spanish speaking maid and we two eldest children went to public school. Initially we spoke no Spanish and they spoke no German. We had some fights due to misunderstandings. At home we spoke German so as not to forget. Books were a great help. I was told that four years later, we children spoke essentially accent free Spanish. In 1956, my father's contract ended. Work was still hard to find in Germany so we moved to the USA. Again, no one in the family spoke English. The situation was similar. My father was able to speak German at work and the rest of us were left to fend for ourselves. We spoke German at home but English at other times. In my opinion, based on my experience, the best way to learn a language is through deep immersion. I took two years of French in high school but basically could survive. My father was never fluent in English, he tended to slip in Spanish and German words. The rest of us were often asked where we came from because they could not place our accents. My middle brother had the opportunity to work with a German company and travelled often to Germany while I had the opportunity to work with some Spanish speaking individuals. Other than a limited technical vocabulary, I was able to communicate easily. The three of us boys spoke German with our parents but after their passing spoke primary English among ourselves
I believe its gonna be alright. My sister and me are both raised in German and English language. Having a foreigner Mother helped alot. Its sometimes hard for me to remember a specific word in German or English. Which sometimes mess up my speech. Living in Germany also has its benefit living near all kinds of foreigner languages and it shows in our school too. I had a really diverse school class, from Turkish to Russian People. My best Friends have Polish Origin and it shows in my life. I cannot speak Polish but there are words that influenced my speech. So don't get confused if your son learns some specific words in a complete different language later in school :D
Hi great video again!! Use your natural one at home. English it is. Rest is up to the child and believe me he will asthonish you both. Please don't compare him to yourself If you're not raised mulii languaged.But I saw already in the comments that each child is different in this as you may find out some day :-) My parents only spoke Dutch, but school system in the Netherlands forces you to learn other ones. As mentioned English is mandatory. I speak and write English and German (also worked there). Understand and speak French, speak Thai (talking about hard language to learn....) badly but can understand it. Studied some years Latin in school, understanding Italian and Spanish isn't that hard if people don't speak to fast. Am I a language guy, no I'm not. It was and still is hard work but I enjoy it! but I had and took the time, for math and other things we're easy for me. My kids are born and raised in the Netherlands with a Thai mother ( speaking Thai to them in the kids younger years) strangely my daughter has big issues with Dutch grammar, speaking ok and speaks fluent Thai (without any lessons and see can't read it) The family and friends there are always amazed if we're there or on an Internet call. I've had her tested and the outcome wasn't a shock: Thai is her "motherlanguage" and yes Dutch language and grammar is hard to learn. Now she's almost a flight attendent, with proper English C1 level and yes German too. She didn't have German before in school, but I helped her by reading German books together and listen to German music. My younger son is quite different. Hardly speaks and understands Thai but also has problems with Dutch grammar. Also tested and his mother language is English ?! Age 13 already C1 level and C2 won't be an issue. With him I'm reading English books but his world is English. Gaming with other children around the world, speaking English. All programming computers, English. Loking movies and listen music, English. First year French in school was horrible, but with some help now second year he's doing quite ok and now first year German also no problems. My advice, be aware on the (German) grammar part. Ask teachers to monitor that and may be in time extra lessons. Speaking won't be an issue growing up in a German setting. Speaking German and English will be normal for him.It's his world. Second advice is playing music at home works great! Or youtube with different subtitles! I listen to English and later on to German music (my choice and started with it under age of 10) I hardly ever hear my children listen to Dutch music, English it is and I'm stimulating German and French music, youtube rules. So don't worry too much and also not on which system to use. Be yourselves and speak your native language and good luck learning German !
Hi Ashton I think your totally on the right way. I think your son won't have any Problems to become bilingual when you speak English to hin at Home. He will learn German automatically when he comes to kita or Kindergarten. Remembering when I was a Young boy both of my parents were German. So I learned English in school I am grown up in a small City with a big Group of US military forces nearby to the former border of East Germany. Additionaly I was a short wave listener and I am following many English Broadcasting Services from all over the World, Voice of America, BBC, Voice of South Africa. It was an absolute Highlight when you had been able to receive Broadcasting services from Australia or New Zealand. It was so exciting to get World News from all these Broadcasting services. So I think my unterstanding of the English language is quiet good. My wrting I don't know, you can judge in it 😄😄😄😄😄😄 Unfortunately in my estimation my knowledge of speaking could be better.In my job I had to speak English but Not frequently.. But I am convinced I am able tol become absolute fluency when I get a Daily exposure to the English language and I am forced to speak on a Daily Basis. So long Story short you needn't to be afraid your so'n will learn both languages automatically. And I am going on to follow your Videos in oder to keep my English state of the art 😄😄😄🤩🤩🤩🤩👍👍👍👍 good luck to you.
Im German, living in Canada. My kids (8/11) only speak German at home since they were born. They are fluent in English and German. Its a gift. And you don't need a strategy, don't overthink it, just do whatever you feel is best.
Hi, I stumbled on to your UA-cam channel and after seeing this video thought I would share my own personal experience. I am the oldest of 5 boys. In 1980 my family moved to Metzingen, Germany which is located about 45 minutes south of Stuttgart. We planned on staying for 3 years during which time my dad worked for a German company. At the time the ages of myself and my brothers was 16, 15, 14, 10 and 8. We were NOT associated with the military, so the only option my parents had was to send us to German schools. I attended the Technisches Gymnasium, two of my brothers attended the Real Schule, one brother attended the standard Gymnasium, and my youngest brother attended the Grund Schule. I will be honest, the first year was TOUGH. Although we did take some German language lessons at the German American Institute in Tübingen, we were basically dropped off at school on the first day and told "good luck" by our parents. It was akin to being thrown into the deep end of the pool when you never learned how to swim. We all struggled that first year, HOWEVER at about the 6 month mark something happened. We all started to learn enough German that we understood our classwork. We started to make friends, and we all started to settle in. We had a lot of good experiences in the second half of the first year, which changed our attitudes for the remainder of our 3 year stay. We did, however, have some setbacks. Only one of us was able to make it through our stay without the need to repeat a grade. If you haven't encountered this yet, it was NOT uncommon for kids in Germany to repeat a school year, especially in the upper grades. When we lived there, if you failed one class you repeated the whole year. We also attended school on 2 Saturday's in the month. I am not sure if that is still common. Our German skills progressed quite quickly after the first 6 months even though we spoke only English at home. The decision to speak only English was partly practical and partly choice. My parents had a much tougher time learning German and they were never comfortable speaking German with their children. Also, remember this was before the internet. We were in a village where NO ONE spoke English, and we had no other outlet. Once we left the door, we only spoke German. Home was our American oasis. Lastly, in spite of the fact that we were fluent in German, we never felt comfortable speaking German with one another. We knew each other in English, not German. It was an issue of comfort. By the time we finished our stay my youngest brother spoke fluent Schwäbisch, not Hoch Deutsch. The rest of us spoke Hoch Deutsch with a thick Schwäbisch accent. Also, my youngest brother, who was 11 years old by this time, spoke a mixture of German and English. It was analogous to Spanglish (if you get my drift). The funny thing is that none of us realized this. We could switch between English and German effortlessly, so we understood everything he said. It was only when we returned to the US and people would ask us what my brother was saying that we realized he was speaking a a mixture of German and English. This was nearly 40 years ago, and yet 4 of us still speak German (albeit a bit rusty and dated). My youngest brother, unfortunately, was too young to retain the German. Ironically, though, if he reads some German text he still speaks with a Schwäbisch accent. We made great friends and had a wonderful, memorable time. It was the most defining time in our lives. I wouldn't trade if for anything. I applaud your decision to raise your son bilingual. Let's be clear your son will probably learn at least one other EU language in school and will be quite proficient by the time he finishes school, so he might even be trilingual. My only advice is that you start teaching your son English grammar and spelling on your own. I say this from another experience. Later in life I married a woman from Mexico. Our two children speak Spanish quite well, but they didn't learn about Spanish grammar and spelling until they learned it in High School. That is a bit late in my opinion. The earlier you learn the more natural it will feel later in life. Best of luck on your adventure.
Extremely research-based - a good expression to describe your videos! (In case it‘s not clear, that‘s a compliment!) A good friend of mine (herself with a German mother/English father; grew up in England with frequent visits to Germany) married a German and has always lived in Germany from her early 20s. They raised their 2 children with the „each parent speaks his/her native language only“ method, and she‘s doing that with her grandchildren now. Her 2 sons are of course fluent in both languages, but I am very aware that their English is „less refined“ because they did not go through the educational process with that language. Many funny stories while they were growing up, but this one is especially good. I was visiting one day and the younger son asked me to read a story to him (he loved being read to). It happened to be a German book, and I ended up reading several of them to him (he kept saying, „More!“). When we stopped, he went to his mother and asked quizzically: „Does Michael speak German?“ She laughed and asked him what language I had been reading to him for the last hour!
That is soooo interesting! I am also curious at what age Jack will fully understand that "mommy and daddy speak English". Although the other day, we were told by our Kita that two delivery men came and were speaking English to each other. Jack immediately jumped up and ran to the door and started babbling at them. They said it really looked like he wanted to talk to them and it was as if he understood that their words sound like mommy and daddy's words.
I was an exchange student as a teen where I truly learned my second language, Dutch. Prior to that I'd had classes in Spanish, Latin, and American Sign Language (ASL), but I only knew some basic grammar and a range phrases. As I met students or adults from abroad in my home town, I'd pick up a little from time to time. Once immersed as an exchange student, I had siblings around my age and a younger sibling. My host parents and the older children could speak a range of English with me as I was stumbling through learning theirs. One etiquette adults use at parties with young children is to speak in English to have a more private conversation since English is taught formally in middle and high school (post elementary grades or approximately ages 12-18). Since my little host sister was learning "too much" English from hearing conversations with me, I was encouraged to speak Dutch at home as soon as possible. This started with a hour at supper time followed by an hour of my choice and an additional hour the next month. I played many board and card games with my siblings. When we visited younger cousins, all the children played Animal Barnyard where each person makes the animal sound in the dark. I quickly learned new common sounds for a dog, bird, chicken, and so on that I wouldn't be so easy to identify. I bought discarded children's books from the library for my family in the U.S. but I found several challenges to share this language with them as I couldn't transport the immersion experience. With one of my siblings, I attended a high school where nearly all of the classes were in Dutch. Some of the teachers encouraged me to use English but I found it too confusing, like grinding gears in a car. My English class was British English and literature where I became aware of vocabulary I had overlooked and the many similarities of Dutch and American English. I also learned a little Dutch sign language which is based on ASL. My host family enjoyed traveling on holidays and hosting people during my stay. Once heard a church service in Dutch and German. As a college student in the U.S. I took immersive German classes. One of the fluent German speaking American students commented that I had a Dutch accent when I spoke German. I'm a mom now and share my experiences and challenges with my kids. There isn't a perfect way to learn except that consistent good exposure makes it far easier than lessons for a class as one's sole exposure. Today we can access movies at home if there are subtitles or other languages on the dvd and UA-cam channels of topics which interest us and our children.
Young children learn languages so easy - its really fascinating. I remember the times when I was a student. There was a pizzaria at the campus. The Owner was italian, his wife was from the US and his 4 year old daughter grew up here in germany. Every time we sat at the bar for an espresso and his daughter came around and spoke to everyone, she swtiched permanently between english (speaking with her mother), to italian (speaking with her dad) and to germany (speaking with me and my friends) - she did this without even thinking about it. Everything fluent of course :)
Oh, boy, Ashton, this could be a long post. My wife and I had been living in Germany for 5 (7) years when the boys came along. She never learned accent-free English; I never learned overly grammatical German. We didn't have any language-learning theories or strategies, and at home we switched from E to D and back again depending on topic, mood, time of day, whatever. In the Kita and at school, they learned German, natch. And then, there were annual vacations in the States. The older boy, more "European" in temperament (he refused my offer of a junior year in the U.S. because Americans are "superficial") now teaches high-school math in California. The "American" boy not only took me up on the junior year, but went back to attend a U.S. military university. But he then spent years doing development / humanitarian relief work all over the world and now runs a Dresden-based NGO. Hooda thot? So just do everything you can to open / keep open every possible option, and they'll find their own way. Sooner or later. But it can be pure hell watching them try. Now, Ashton, I have a bone to pick with you. Before worrying about Jack's language development, please try to square away your own English. I mean the pronouns. I mean the "I". All of your vids offer examples, but in this one, it starts at 0:56: "...challenging for Johnathan and I...". That's just wrong! You wouldn't say "...challenging for I...", would you? No, it's ME: challenging for me, and challenging for Johnathan and me. And sad to say, you are a serial offender: three times in the intro alone, and your other vids are rife with similar mistakes. Oh, you're in good company: Myth-Buster Adam Savage loves to do this, and Obama was was very gratified when, after the election, "W" invited "Michelle and I to the White House for coffee". But it was wrong for them, it's wrong for you, and please don't pass this habit along to Jack! -- So now, I've said my piece. Still friends?
Hi there. You are absolutely right... grammatically there are instances where it would have been correct to say "Jonathan and ME". However, like the examples you provided... this is an extremely common grammatical "error" that I would not be surprised if the majority of Americans do it. It is just one of those things that when hearing the "correct" sentence, it sounds "icky" - if that makes sense?
Wie immer ein sehr interessantes Video! Was mich an meine Kindheit erinnert hat, warum weil ich Spanier bin und in Deutschland geboren wurde. Meine Eltern haben die Methode gewählt das jeder eine Sprache spricht . Mein Vater Deutsch, weil er es besser sprach, meine Mutter spanisch. Was dann, laut meiner Mutter, zu einer interessanten Situation führte. Wurde ich von meinem Vater gefragt auf Deutsch, antwortete ich auf Spanisch und bei meiner Mutter dann genau anders. Dazu muss ich aber auch anführen das ich zwei Schulen besucht habe morgens die Deutsche Schule und 2 mal die Woche Nachmittags Spanischen Unterricht. Mit 55 Jahren bin ich mittlerweile in 4 Sprachen Fit genug um als " Native Speaker" zu gelten. Macht weiter so und informiert uns über die Unterschiede in den Kulturkreisen.
My husband is Austrian and I'm Danish, our common language is English, so our children grew up trilingual. Since we live in Denmark all three children learned Danish in the school from Kindergarten class. From 4th grade they learned English and from 7th grade they also had German classes. So visiting my in-Laws in Vienna they learned the 3rd language is very usefull.
Hats off to all the work and effort you put into your videos...the academic background clearly shows;) Maybe a second PhD down the road? Check out the videos from My Merry Messy Life of the McFalls family, they moved to Germany with four kids.
It can't be wrong to give children the opportunity to learn something with fun at an early age and to challenge it in an age-appropriate way, which of course always depends a bit on the individual child. Especially when it comes to languages, it is actually good to use different possibilities, if a child shows serious interest in it, then definitely support it. Any language that I speak more can only be an advantage. The works by Reinhard Lakomy and Monika Ehrhardt, "The Magic Tree of Dreams"( Der Traumzauberbaum), or "Story songs: the raindrop Paule Platsch" (Geschichtenlieder: der Regentropfen Paule Platsch) wonderful stories and songs are written very simply and understandably and are very well done and suitable for children as well as adults, highly recommended. Hihi, what a sweet little man, he is so adorable, like his parents.
I'm sure you'll have many more experiences like the one at 22:00 during the first 3-4 years of child hood :-D (At least we had, and I don't think that neither us nor our kids are out of the ordinary in any way) As to your question at 22:33 - maybe the same way I learned/improved my english: (1) Started listening to english radio stations (BFBS first, later AFN as we moved down south) at a young age (they just had the better music on rotation :-) (2) Watched movies or shows in english with german (or other) subtitles (3) Read books in english if possible. As a result of (2) I also picked up a good amount of swedish on the way. My dad was living in Sweden for >30y and especially when I was younger I was with him touring Sweden during the summer holidays. Since I liked to watch movies un-dubbed and the scandinavian countries regularlys do *not* dub and just slam subtitles on, I indirectly learned swedish since I could follow the english audio and matched that against the swedish subtitles. Add to that the fact almost every Scandinavian knows at least basic english, so that helps too. That and being from the northern part of germany :-)
Great video explaining the different methods of foreign language learning and immersion. I am a German living in the USA, and we used the one parent, one language method to raise my daughter bilingually. I found that reading children’s books to her solely in German, exposing her to German children’s songs and nursery rhymes and German children’s shows/movies was extremely helpful. Also, communicating with German family members and friends in Germany by Skype/FaceTime helped enforce her German language skills. You will be pleasantly surprised how quickly Jack will be able to switch between German and English as his language skills develop. I have also found that bilingual children have an easier time picking up an additional language in school. At the time my daughter went to preschool, her German language skills were stronger than her English skills. However, that quickly changed because of the constant exposure to the English language all around her, and now her English skills are much better than her German skills, but she has a strong foundation in the German language and can carry on conversations with German family members. I would consider her mostly fluent in German. My daughter and I continue to speak German to each other, although I have to admit that some English words get mixed in by her when she cannot think of a German word. Much success to you guys in your endeavor to raise Jack bilingually.
I also wanted to mention that learning both languages and cultures helped my daughter embrace her two different heritages and backgrounds and she feels comfortable and at home in both countries.
Wow thank you so much for sharing your experience! This is exactly what we hope to do with Jack (although, admittedly in reverse with English at home and German at school). I am so happy that your daughter has successfully embraced both languages. Kids are just amazing little sponges.
Grew up monolingual as is rather common after all; I guess your motivation has to be profound to pierce that language and cultural barrier especially if you weren't born with it. Mine, it is! I just crave what I didn't have throughout my development years and beyond. I started implementing English the better part of almost 13 years ago on my own but then it has been 6 years since I greatly increased my scrutiny adding books, newspapers to my already established routine of daily hearing hours of spoken English itself. I will say, I came to British English later as I started my journey overseas with American English, the NBA being my very first point of contact with the matter of picking up the language. The idea of tackling German came later as events aligned with one another towards that specific region of the world. I'm quite new to it, it has been 4 years now that I've tried to confront it and I intend to keep on poking into it, consistency being the key to whatever result you might hope to achieve one day. So I guess I will stick around this channel some more if you don't mind 😄😊 On the whole if Jack loves the people speaking the language, that he will come to absorb and relish for the rest of his life 🌝 Un saluto dall'Italia, bella e saporita 🇮🇹🌞
My daughter ( german) and her husband ( english) speak only in their languages to the children. But both parents speak only english with each other. My daughter speaks it fluently. Living in Germany they found a bilingual Kita. One Erzieher was german the other from an english speaking country. The 6 years old son now speaks fluently in both languages, the 2,5 years old one understands both. It helps that they meet the english family 4-5 times a year. Now the older one stayed for one week with his english grandma and all were fascinated how good his english is. Now going to school in his first year he will learn english there. And he will learn reading and writing english in Grundschule.
I am sure you are on a better path raising your son bilingual than I was when my children grew up in Denmark. I am their German father. But I didn't speak much German with them. So they didn't learn it as well as I would have hoped.
I love this topic, as someone who studied English literature and linguistics, as a mother of a 5-year-old trying to become bilingual and as someone who has learned 9 languages so far (though most far far from fluent). Your approach with Jack sounds perfect to me in your situation. Also for another reason you haven't mentioned. You talked about grammar mistakes you might make. But it is also better in terms of accent if he learns from native speakers. You talked about it being important to learn the language in multiple ways. I actually wrote a seminar paper on developing language skills and something that was stressed again and again is that true bilingualism needs the child to develop both languages equally, meaning he either has to also learn to read and write English when he learns this in school for German. Next to teaching it yourself or through language courses another option are international schools where subjects are taught in multiple languages. My son's situation is a bit complicated. My mother tongue is Swiss German and I'm a single mum. His daddy speaks English but lives in London, so other than zoom calls he can't really help. Because my son was very late with learning to talk and had difficulties, I focussed on Swiss German first. But I will eventually have to teach him English as well. He already has quite some vocabulary and loves his TipToi books as well as audio books, and music. But the plan to really get him to talk is to swap to English as main language at home. Certainly not ideal but in my situation the only feasible option. Something I found really good as a source to read stories to him are books intended for children who start to read English. They use very simple language with lots of repetition which makes it a lot easier to understand. We love the ladybird edition for example. Now to tell him stories and later he can start to read them himself.
Ah wonderful thank you so much for the recommendations and the advice! We also found while researching for this video that we are going to have to put in some good work teaching him how to read and write in English while he is also learning the same skills in German. Interestingly, there is a French-German school in Freiburg but the only English school is a private boarding school that is quite some distance away.
@@TypeAshton sometimes embassies have resources or addresses that can be helpful. In Switzerland it's the same. Most multilingual schools are private and cost a fortune. Public schools do offer early English and French but the quality is mediocre at best. In the lower grades it's mostly singing songs and such and the subject is taught by their regular teacher so the quality of pronunciation varies wildly.
In Switzerland it is self-evident that parents living near the border of the language will educate the children in both languages. I have observed this one in a ship near Murten/Morat: These children are able to change from German to French and in reverse order from one sentence to the next.
Most people in the Netherlands are bilingual and a good portion is trilingual, especially those who live in the east. We grew up with both English and German language through school and TV. Mixed language parents have even more possibilities to raise multilingual children. It gives kids a headstart in life in general.
That was all extremely interesting for me, especially since i never had to think about that. I guess your approach makes sense from what you presented but i also saw the "problem" of your last point. I guess it might be a option to switch to a different strategy once Jack gets exposed to English via different sources than both of you. So it might make sense to switch to different strategy which exposes both of you more to German once has a solid German foundation and starts English in school. And yes, it would be a total waste not to raise Jack bilingual especially since what you said about the sponge is completely true. It is much easier to learn multiple language at a young age.
I think your method is the best in your case. I think the parents should talk to the children in a language they really master. I'm German, my wife is French, so we chose the one parent one language approach, with the extension I usually spoke French with my wife. Additionally to that they went to french pre k group one afternoon a week. Result: They are all fluent in speaking, but not perfect in writing, they learned reading and writing french at school.
My parents are from Poland and I was even born there, but we left Poland when I was around 3 and I grew up in Germany. My Mom only spoke only Polish with us and we still do, but I went to a German school and had mostly German friends, of course. Now I am 36 and German is my first language. I am quite fluent in Polish but it is not the same as my German. In fact… I feel that my english is better than my Polish, because I am more exposed to that language now. In my opinion you should speak the language you are best at with your child. Other languages come with exposure around them. If you are not fluent in a language, you could end up teaching your kids a faulty way of speaking. And speaking of „teaching“, you do not teach young children in a school like setting. Just talk to them and interact. Play, do things. They learn along the way
Hello Ashton, great movie. But be prepared that Jack will lear 3 "languages". Besides English and high-german in school he will also adopt the local Slang that ist spoken in the Freiburg Region. To pick up Jacks first sentence WAS IST DAS? In the local Dialekt it would more sound like WAS ISCH DES? so his pronounciation will also include this Dialekt, because all his Friends will speak that way and AS you said belonging and being accepted in a group specific language knowledge is important. But believe mehr he will handle that with ease. AS In die moving from Baden to Württemberg. Nobody understood what In said, so I had to reskill my Badische Dialekt to swabian in order to be accepted and make friends. Took me about 6 monthly to Master that. Today this would take mehr forever. Jack will handle that with ease. Wish you guys all the best.
Dear Forest Family, Being at least bilingual not only helps you and children but I find that being bilingual or my case trilingual is helping immensely with my senior family member,who has dementia. You see at his home, with the exception of my senior family member,it's only one language (English). It's the only language they know. He wasn't speaking that much. His wife was afraid that he might be deteriorating verbally but I when my mother and I started speaking with him in English and would switch to another language in the middle of a sentence, he not only perked up but was happily conversing in dual languages
In linguistics there was a field called second language acquisition where it is discussed that children acquire the language through being exposed to it. So in 20:00 following you are right the young ones will pick it up easily. Just provide structure to everyday life so it is clear when is what. In teaching the older children people actually tended to teach those older one's similarly. Since the brain seems to be able with the little ones to pick up the new language why not using the same approach in classic lessons so expose to language but not talk about rules that much. You do not explain he she it -s rules to Jack. He just gets it.
I was born in Switzerland to German parents, who could not speak Swiss German (which you might think is similar to German, but really is not as every German will tell you that has been to/moved to Switzerland thinking it was just like moving to a different Bundesland). Hence, proper German was th only language spoken at home, but I picked up Swiss German on the street and while playing with friends (it was a time before the wonderful day care facilities of today existed). When I was 5 years old my father had the opportunity to work in Michigan (USA) for two years and our whole family moved. We still spoke exclusively German at home, as my mother did not speak English very well at all, but me and my bothers all picked up English organically on the street, in kindergarden, and school. Our parents did support our English language developing by sending us to some additional tutoring (especailly me), so that I could keep up more easily in school. After two years living in the US we moved back to Switzerland and I started primary school. Some schooling challenges did start occurring for me at this point. As I had completed Year 1 and half of 2 in the US, I was well ahead of my Swiss class mates in maths, but as you know speaking out numbers in English in German (especially those 21 and above) is very different. Hence, I struggled quite a bit in my first couple of years in Swiss schools due making what seemed like errors in my spoken (but not written) maths in class and the challenges of having to learn writting German (Swiss German is only spoken, not a written language). I completed all my schooling and went to university in Switzerland and the English I picked-up as a 5-7 year old coupled with the English I took throughout secondary school in Switzerland has served me very well during my studies. In fact, it made me confident enough to apply to US PhD programmes, recieving 3 offers. Fast forward, I graduated with a US PhD, worked 2 years as a Postdoc at a US Ivy-League university, and now live and work in the Northeast of England with my wife and two kids. As her parents and relatives do not speak English at all, it was imperative that our kids learn to speak Swiss-German and after some research we settled on the same method as you guys. My kids are not 7 and 5 and are completely fluent in both languages and are doing very well in primary school, including their ability to speak the regional Gordie accent (...just google it...). The key to makng that method work, I think is having some regular daycare arrangements. Both our kids went to nursury for at least 3 days a week during school time, which is where they learned most/all of their English. We still only speak Swiss German in the House and it is completely natural for them (in fact, they switch seemlessly between Swiss-German and Engish when friends of theirs are over to play, just like I switch from Swiss-German to German when speaking to my parents or brothers in the presence of our wives/girl friends). In fact, because we also exclusively read bedtime stories in German, my 7 year old has started to pick-up how to read in German and is now reading German at the appropriate level he would if he were going to primary school in Switzerland. Given my experience, both as a child and parent, I think I can vouch for the method you guys have chosen and personally recommend it to colleagues asking me about it. It is of course significantly easier if both parents speak the same but different language from the country they live in. Friends that are themselves bilingual couples in a foreign context have it much harder and find it much more challenging for their child to pickup the different languages.
Very interesting story! Thanks for sharing your language journeys. We totally feel you on the number learning from 21 on, it's one of the early struggles for people starting the language.
My German immigrant mother raised me with both German and English, which means I had British English in my nursery school in Chicago. The one she did not want to send me to, but I insisted on because the other children on our block were in school. Of course my English thrived there. I went to Germany each summer and that is where my German developed. Later on I had it in school with monolingual children. When my German immigrant husband and I had our daughter, we created a Heritage language after school program at her school which she was in as long as she was at that school. In school she took Mandarin and Spanish. In a different school for high school, she has taken German as a foreign language with classmates because that was our best alternative until this year, her senior year, where she is taking an extra Saturday German school class to develop her vocabulary and learn more complex grammar forms. They offered her the C1 test for German university, where she plans to go next year. This class is through the DANK Haus Kinderschule in Chicago. Most of my daughter's classmates are no longer taking any language in their senior year. They only needed two years, and those who did not continue take electives. Mostly those who went on exchange to a German speaking country in their junior year are still taking German. My daughter had her Austrian exchange partner come and stay with us from Wien in the fall of 11th grade, and then she went in January and spent most of the rest of the school year there. She also went back in the summer in time for the end of their school year celebrations and ball, and then to hang out. So, German comes easily to her, and her German is close to native like. She also knows a lot of Austrian words and expressions. We live in a University neighborhood and most of our good friends are from other countries, and are multilingual, so that is the milieu in which our daughter is growing up. One family is Finnish and Egyptian/German and the daughters speak Finnish, German and English, and are taking French in school . The older one has been learning Arabic in a course, which is the language she is least fluent in. Other friends are Austrian and Turkish and their children speak English, German and Turkish and are taking French in school. Another couple are Polish and German, so their children speak both languages, and are taking Spanish in school. Another family speaks Hebrew and the children are bilingual in Hebrew and English and take German in school, which their parents speak fluently. Most of the parents I have mentioned speak multiple languages like my husband, who has German, English and then to a lessor degree Greek, Latin, Italian, French and Russian. Right now he is learning Ukrainian on Duolingo, and my daughter is trying to teach herself French. She will be using it this summer in a class trip as well as the Spanish on trips to Costa Rica and Spain. We feel that people should know many languages because it helps us be global citizens. Also, being in a mommy group when my daughter was young with parents from several countries lent itself to my learning about other parenting methods. That is, another piece of linguistic plurality is learning culture and customs going along with languages. I have enjoyed looking a the series Generation Helikopter Eltern to look at how our parenting values fit with the German ideas of parenting being expressed in the show. www.zdf.de/dokumentation/generation-helikopter-eltern I am enjoying your series as well because being from Illinois, and having our families in Niedersachsen as well as a home in Northern Germany, I can relate to your German-Midwest USA connections.
From my perspective, if I were in your position I would like you now choose #2 English as home language, but it obv. cannot stay like this forever. This has to be carried on until you and Jonathan are really "naturally fluent" in German - until then frankly, there is basically no other approach possible - from around Vorschule one should (at home) switch daily #4 and execute that meticulously. For ex. starting a sentence at 23:59 => in German ending it at 0:01 in English with a blink of an eye, that does mean it does not matter if one is drunk, sleepy, trying to settle conflicts etc. Very hard to achieve, once it is up and running it works. It helps to learn and understand colloquial words and daily used words in a home setting, something like "Gibst Du mir den Sparschäler!" etc. The advantage is that everyone learns from each other, it has to be achieved that the switch is natural, not kind of artificial, but one needs a certain level of language skills to succeed. As soon as everyone is speaking those languages perfectly one can switch to #3 - I do think in contrast what was said in the vid, in order to make #3 work everyone has to be able to express oneself effortlessly in the non-native language, think about conflict discussions etc. Thanks for summoning up those solutions, from my point of view I think it is not an either-or it is more a decision of which method is superior at which time/situation in life. I have lived during my 20's in a flat in the UK with 5 nationalities :) - We used approach #3 at home for French, German, Spanish, and English and #4 for Italian. It was BABYLON! The most irritating thing was that we had exchange semesters abroad in Spain, Germany, and France, therefore we always planned to stay together in one apartment. In Spain that did not work out we had a Japanese girl with us in the flat - it was fun. When we have returned from a club night it was 5 languages in one sentence, the basic structure was always English, all in all, it was quite mad, and it obv. was dependent on the language skills of those persons we have brought home with us. Mayhem! P.S.: ❤️ the cute ending!
yes I think as Jack gets older we will probably end up switching methods once his English is well established. ❤️❤️❤️ All in all, we are thrilled that Jack will have such a varied exposure to languages growing up here.
your child will learn german no problem even if you only speak english at home i am from australia came to the netherlands when i was 4 we would speak english at home till i was 8 and watched mostly english tv i had no problem learning dutch it did help my dad is dutch and raised here in the netherlands
From what I recall of my (few) psychology lectures, bilingualism actually delays the onset of dementia + gives a theory of mind advantage! So he is very lucky to be able to grow up bilingual :)
I see lots of comments for people saying talk your native language and not your nonnative language as “you dont want to teach him mistakes” Im a bit biased as Im part of a whole community of parents raising their kids on their non native language. Im raising my kid in both spanish and italian. My italian is basic at most but we read so much to make up for my lack of knowledge. We also watch alot of italian shows to hear and repeat the spoken language. Anyways people can do it but it takes alot of work 💪and outside resources. So far we are a yr and a half and I see wonderful results so far but as adam beck says its a marathon not a sprint. Best of luck!!
Is a gift that you give your children when you speak another language. We speak, High German! Spanish, English and Swiss, because we live in Switzerland. The children started talking later, but they have a larger vocabulary
You've made a solid choice regarding language and your kid(s). He'll grow up perfectly bilingual. My only additional advice: as time goes by, the kids will ask you what different words mean. When that happens, never just tell them the German equivalent -- define the word in English and give them examples in English.
Both my husband and I were raised bilingual using the heritage language method. We have picked 2 other languages along the way and our daughter is being raised trilingual. We are using a version of heritage language because we do used to using our first 2 languages interchangeable and German is reserved for Kita. She will say one word in all 3 languages.
7:20 former neighbours have brought up their children with 4 (!) languages. She is Asian, he is French living in Germany and the majority of relatives understand English..... When the children were young they kind of mixed languages together, but actually who is not? Now as grown ups, they easily switch between languages. Moreover it is hard to tell if they are native speakers or not, as they have learned the necessary mouth movements from an early age. When learning a language later in life it takes years of training to get the necessary interaction of muscles of the jaw, the mouth, tongue etc at the right point together to utter each sound correctly.
That is AMAZING! It sounds like our good friends who are raising their daughter (she is 3.5) to speak Lithuanian, Dutch, German and English! Just amazing.
Hi, you are on a very good track, no worries. And gosh, he is so cute! One word of advice from the experience of friends of mine (bilingual kiddos, German/ French, in northern Germany, in the 80ies before easy access to French literature, movies, radio etc. online): All three boys are perfect native speakers in German and French. However, in writing and everything that reaches an academic level, they are hesitant (and even think I have an advantage over them after having lived, studied and worked in Belgium and France for two years each, I am C2 level and teach it but am nowhere near accent free, on the phone folks think I am Belgian or Senegalese :-)) - which puzzled me a little bit. It's just the reduced practice in writing and reading that limits their self confidence at the highest level. And all kids are very bright and accomplished in a very nurturing household. The cure? Well, you are a researcher, you'll figure it out :-). (but for starters, lots of reading in English as well will help Jack to mitigate that last level threshold of perfect command of his parents' native language). It's a challenge for much later, but if he has passion for literature in both languages, you can probably circumvent that minor trap.
Our now 15-year-old son grew up in the UK until he was twelve. At that point we decided to move to Germany because of Brexit. My husband and I are both German so in the UK we decided to speak only German at home and English everywhere else, unless we were with people who spoke German too, or English at home with visitors, so I guess we did the people based version you described. We regularly visited German relatives too, for several weeks every year. When my son was about to join nursery I noticed that he pretty much understood everything in English that suited his age and to make his transition into a purely English speaking environment easier, I started speaking in English with him at home during play sessions. This worked well and he felt at home in the nursery right away at 2 years and 9 months. After that it was again mostly German at home but it didn’t help that we as his parents are more or less bilingual too (after many years outside of Germany at that point) and it was way too easy to slip into English just repeating something someone said or talking about what happened during the day. We were on a slippery slope. 😅 When our son started school at the age of four this got more and more as he learned new vocabulary there that he didn’t know in German. So I got into a habit of talking to him mostly in German and then instantly translate his English replies back to him so that he would at least have a passive knowledge of those expressions. Nevertheless by the age of 12 his German was nowhere as strong as his English which we really noticed every time we went to visit Germany: he was shy about answering questions as his language reaction was in English and he wasn’t able to be as quick witted in German. In the UK I never took the time to teach him how to read or write in German. I would have liked to send him to some Saturday school thing for that but it was too far away and would have eaten up the whole day. When it became clear that we would move to Germany with him, some months beforehand I started to teach him a little about reading German with the help of some books for primary school children. He picked up quickly how easy German spelling and pronunciation can be. We registered him with a German Gymnasium and were hoping for the best. 😅Amazingly three years later his German is almost as good as his English, even without much intervention. At the beginning he spelt almost all German words with English sounds - a nightmare for the teachers but they were lenient, he’s not the only child ever in Germany with another language being stronger. Initially it was a struggle, I had to translate some of his homework for him, especially history. They put him into a DAZ course at school (German for foreigners) but that wasn’t what he needed as he still had German grammar naturally in his head. So after six months they let him simply get on with things. I could already tell after three months that he had got more used to everything when he came home after school saying, that school was boring. He had internalised the new lingo and procedures and everything became more normal. He still struggles with some German expressions these days but he’s on a good way and doing well at school. We still speak a mixture of both languages at home and our son uses spoken English at lot while gaming with friends from various countries. My husband uses English while speaking with colleagues and his company’s customers. But I can feel that I get a bit rusty when speaking, I don’t have enough exposure. So, looking at our experience I would recommend to you to be a bit more active about your son’s English when he gets old enough to read and write and spends more time outside your English speaking home bubble. English lessons in school will bore him to death by the way 😆 but if you keep the ball rolling he should at least get a good grade in that subject easily.
2 роки тому
What I forgot to say is that many moons ago I studied linguistics so I found this whole language development thing naturally extremely interesting to watch. At no point ever in the UK was our son slowed down by growing up with two languages, only when we moved to Germany it took him a while to catch up. Funnily enough he‘s not keen at all at learning another language, French in his case, but he is actually quite good at getting the grammar.
Wow this is really an interesting story, thank you for sharing it. It's incredible how quickly kids can pick up foreign languages. Especially looking in on it as adults who constantly struggle to learn and understand the grammar. 😂 As for him learning English in school... you're absolutely right. Maybe we can enroll him in French classes instead. In his spare time, he can help his friends with his English fluency.
2 роки тому
@@TypeAshton our experience is that German schools are not really good at allowing your child do a different course instead. I don’t think there are primary schools that do French anyway but it could be different at a secondary school where they usually have French language teachers. My son wasn’t doing very well in French in his Gymnasium at first as French in the UK is taught in a slower speed, so they gave him some tasks to do while being in his English class. A good English teacher should use your son as an excellent free language resource! 😅 I told my son before joining the Gymnasium never ever to correct the English teacher in front of the class, it undermines their authority. Their English is not always perfect but you just need to let it go - unless they wrongly correct your written tests. Some of his class mates commented that his English sounded weird as they were not used to a British accent. It will be easier for your son in that respect as most people here are more familiar with American English. Funny thing is they learn British spellings (e.g. favour) but often try to speak the American way. 🤷🏼♀️
Hi. I want to tell you that I love your scientific approach to each topic. Since I have studied brain development for programming neural networks I will give my opinion and knowledge. For learning at any age, it is important to have fun learning, because the amygdala will block learning otherwise or make it really hard, short explanation. I think your approach is very suitable for now. On the other hand, don't worry be happy is a very good approach too 🙂. I would recommend that you speak more German at home when Jack is speaking German fluently. And adding another language as soon as possible, when the education system offers it for free and the other kids can do it too, would help to get Jack x-multilingual 🙂. He will outrace you at learning German anyhow. As humans we are lazy and I missed the opportunity to learn French in Realschule because I had been lazy and did not want to go to school longer than the bare minimum. But I regretted it only a year later, when we had an exchange with our french partner city. Now another scientific aspect, which you may be able to get your friends wondering. German kids learn German by laying in the stroller and adults saying: " dutsy dutsy du". And with all this they learn to say Mama and Papa and more, before they go to Kita and hear a lot more real German. And a couple of years ago, there has been no Kita and the kids learned German, like myself, though I have no clue about grammar, but I get it right. Imagine how impressive the brain capacity of a toddler must be, to fulfill this task. An adult would never stay the chance to make this happen. I could be that it takes longer that he starts actually speaking, but when he finally does, then most probably bilingual. The plasticity of the brain has then be programmed to learn more languages easily. And kids learn much more easy anyhow. But this process makes the difference between bilingual und monolingual. You could do this with music and art too, but don't forget, learning has to be fun. And actually the bilingual process of forming the brain to learn languages more easily will help him to learn other things, like music or art more easily too. So you I think and hope you can relax and enjoy and take it more the Australian way: "no wucking forries mate" 🙂. Greetings from Freiburg
Well her scientific take doesn't surprise me in the least. For me its a direct result of the type of education she received along the way to her PhD. That type of education trains one's mind in a *very* specific way and drastically changes one's thought process along the way. At least that's what I've observed / experienced. And yes "fun" or better put "absence of forcing to learn" is one of the key elements. Males are known to (generally) start speaking later than females. But also many tend to go from "no talk at all" to "firehose mode" at an instant... Our 1stborn (8f) was *very* vocal by reaching the 1.5y mark. The progression from single words to 3 word "sentences" and then to thoughts/arguments spanning multiple sentences was... aehm... "fast" (and tedious/exhausting but in a good way:-)
A friend of mine is from Finland and married to a Russian. Both talk in English and live in Germany. Their kids speak all 4 languages fluently, and mix them sometimes to funny sentences when then talk to each other. Mainly when they feel a certain word e.g. in English, might describe something better. It's stunning to see them switching the languages when they discuss with the parents. About 20 years ago I saw a similar family at Tokyo Airport (he was German and she Japanese). The kids were about 4 or 5 years in age. Everyone at the launge was stunned watching and listening them. If it works with 4 resp. 3 languages, it works for sure with 2.
My tip would be that start watching, well everything, in german with english subtitles (or the other way around). Thats how i (mostly) learned english. it helps with understanding and teaches the written form of the language as well.
You are doing the right thing already. You always want to speak the language that comes natural to you, you want to be able to use a nursery rhyme or song or saying or all the Mom things we tend to do...and all these things would not be available to you in German, and Jack will outgrow nursery rhymes quicker than you can culturally integrate into the German culture to such an extent. What you are doing will work fine for him, it is a great choice and is the best choice in your language situation. There will come a point in time, maybe not on your next trip to the US, but some later one, where all of a sudden he will notice that 'nobody speaks German around here' or he will come to the point in time, where he recognizes that his friends do not speak English like he does, and it will actually confuse him, and there will be many other milestones like that. Enjoy them, it is fun to see them grow up bilingual and confident in both cultures. Also, do not worry about a few words that get mixed up at times, especially in the first 2-3 years. That is completely normal, the brain sorts such stuff out, as time goes on. It is no different than a child in the US, when you ask him or her whether they drank their milk, and they respond: 'I drinked it already'. A half year later that problem is gone, independent of whether you chose to correct the child or not. It just works itself out. If you later on choose to move back to the States, keeping up his German will be the bigger challenge. Especially, as he needs to learn the age appropriate new vocabulary, and needs to learn how to read and write. In the end, we adults do not talk like 5 year olds, and if his German would happen to freeze at that level, this is all he would have. His pronunciation would always be completely natural, but he would regress in knowledge, and he would never develop all the new skills that 6-18 year olds happen to learn. And yes, that does include reading and writing, as you say. And I mean not only basic letters, but also writing an essay at age 14 that is at the level of his peers. Keeping his German up in the US is much harder than doing the same in Germany, as culture tends to work against your interests. But with a lot of determination and the right kind of German classes you can manage that too. All the best, you are off to a great start.
what i ofund interesting in the first years is how forming the pronunciationworks if you got time note down how your son develops with certain words: so that nanne became nonne and eventually German nochmal in our case. It is so fun to watch.
I am English, my wife is Russian and we live in the French-speaking part of Switzerland. Our daughter is now 15. She is absolutely native in Russian, English and French. By "native" I mean better than merely fluent - she has no detectable accent to native speakers of any of the 3 languages. So I feel a bit "qualified" to comment. Your approach seems the right one to me. This worked for us:
Reading books to our daughter at every opportunity (and at bedtime without fail very night) - me speaking ONLY in English, my speaking wife ONLY in Russian - i.e. Each parent only in the language they are 100% comfortable with. Then, from the age of 2 she attended a French-only creche/kindergarden and then local schools. She moves fluently and fluidly between all 3 languages. She has been learning a 4th language - German - at school for several years and seemed to pick it up much quicker than most children.
Our daughter does not do this but we know of children who do the "you can speak to me in your language but I will reply to you in the community language" but just stick to the "rules" which in your case is "mummy and daddy speak to you ONLY in English"!
My strong advice is that you continue on your path: speak English at home and your son WILL speak German in the community. Do not worry about whether or not he will do this - he will amaze you at how quickly he does this once he is mingling with German-speaking children. And speaking 2 languages will help him to pick up a 3rd or 4th language with ease.
Then just wait for that knife-to-the-heart moment when he says to you "I know the word in German but I do not know what it is in English"!!!
my wife was raised similiar. Greece at home, german in community. she is so talented in learning languages, that she learned spanish, italian, french with ease. Now she tries to learn japanese and korean. I think the sooner a child learns diffrent languages, the easier she learns new languages as an adult.
My children have a Dutch father and an English mother. They grew up in the Netherlands. By today’s standards we did everything wrong when it comes to bilingual education. Sometimes we spoke Dutch, at other times we spoke English. I sometimes spoke English with the children and my wife spoke Dutch with them, or vice versa. It didn’t matter. They are fully bilingual. At 4 years old the eldest could do more or less simultaneous translation between her two great-grandmothers one of whom didn’t speak English and the other didn’t speak Dutch. Children are so versatile.
Have heard similar from friends. I tie some of this to fun songs or stories to help the kids when they don't hear a language outside the home. They enjoyed learning some Dutch from a song about flavors of ice cream.
Growing up bilingual is one of the greatest gifts you can ever give a child, in my opinion.
AMEN!
Raising your (so cute) little one bilingual or building your new home.... you put so much effort, deep research and at least fully comprehension for every little detail into each "project". I love that approach, admire your energy that goes into it and most of all... thank you so much for sharing all of your thoughts, concerns and experiences.
Awe thank you so much. Making this video really was a wonderful learning experience for me. I'm really glad you enjoyed it.
MY children were brought up tri-lingual they learned Portuguese from their mother, English from me and Dutch at school - if you start early it is quite simple
I am American, my husband is German so he spoke German to our children. I spoke English only with my now 15 and 17 year olds because my German was so new to me when they were little. However, they heard me speak poor German from the start in day to day life as I had to speak German to Erzieher, shops keepers, neighbors, doctors and everything else in life. But I read to them in English, my husband in German and by the time they started Grundschule, they could already read basic stories in English and German as well as switch languages like a switch and they knew exactly which language to speak to which person. Example, we boarded a flight to the US, as the Lufthansa plane landed, my then 4 year old stood up and though he spoke German the entire flight, loudly stated in English, “Ok, now we must speak English!” I had another passenger say to me in German, if only if were that easy. Lucky child. Since we also spent 6 weeks at a time in the US, my children also used their English speaking with family and cousins. When strangers suddenly heard my boys switch to a German when talking to my husband, they always did a double take. Their English was fluent and accentless. They could not believe their English was their lesser used language.
Growing up in the US, my parents were Italian immigrants so we spoke only Italian at home and with the relatives. The older cousins, some born in Italy including my brother all spoke fluent Italian. Being part of the youngest cousin group, I understood all Italian but mostly answered in English ( Shame on me, I can say now.) But I had no other use for Italian growing up. All my relatives were already in the US and there was no other opportunity to speak Italian. Also no UA-cam, Netflix and even getting Italian story books and such was costly and difficult.
I think having English as a second(ary) language is also easier now with UA-cam, Netflix, original language films shown in the theaters. I just look at my boys’ friends and how fluent they are in English even with no English speaking family. They have so much more exposure to English than I had with my Italian growing up.
Now that my kids are older, they prefer all movies in the original language, whatever that may be. They read in whichever language an item is in. We discuss things in the language that fits that subject. If we discuss US politics, it is in English. We discuss the newest BMW model that just came out, in German. And myself, I’m trying to get that Italian back.
Woah, I wrote a book. Sorry. I just wanted to add all teachers strongly encouraged bi or trilingualism. Not one ever said, you should focus only on German.
Wow that is super interesting! Neither of us grew up exposed to foreign languages this is all new territory for us. But you're right, the environment in which little ones grow up now and the exposure with technology really offers wonderful opportunities for language learning.
On a funny note - before I moved to Germany and was living in the US (but I knew I was coming) I tried to watch Disney movies on Disney+ so that I could try to see how well I could understand it. Interestingly, their app doesn't automatically make all languages available. So for most movies, German wasn't an option (even for subtitles) but now that we live in Germany, Disney+ shows us both languages.
@@TypeAshton Maybe it is also a good thing not to overly theoreticize. Lets say there are many approaches and they all might work. In my opinion the idea having both parents do their respective native language seems best. But that does not work in your case. You just need to make sure that your speaking time in German is high enough to advance. Might well be that you cannot hold up speaking English to Jack all the time... I guess you/we 'll all have to wait and see
@@swabia1554 I agree. I did basic research, was aware of the various approaches and also how a bilingual child’s speech develops (language mixing is common) and just went with it. Also every child is so different. My older son spoke in full, long sentences in both languages from the start.
My younger son took forever to put multi word sentences together but then a switch flipped and he preferred German ( like I English over Italian) but at 15 and 17 they are just fine. And their differences had nothing to do with bilingualism but rather their different personalities. My older son will still talk your ear off (like his mom ☺️)and my younger still quiet.
Enjoy and have fun with Jack’s development.
I've been raised in French speaking countries (for 7 years) by German parents. The most interesting part was that my German differed from the other Kids German because it was "older". My parents didn't speak a lot of German when living abroad with anyone that lived in Germany so there German "froze in time" as opposed to the German spoken in Germany which always changes. To this day I actively use the Futur II and Plusquamperfekt, because my parents did. Those two timeforms somewhat died out in day to day German conversations at the beginning of the Millenium which is why most of the my friends my age don't really use that at all. I first noticed that in school, when all the kids were struggeling to form sentences in those forms and I wasn't. A few days ago a friend said: "Wir waren gewesen kann man nicht sagen, das heißt wir sind gewesen". So he uses those time forms so little that they even sound wrong to him even though they are technically correct.
I highly doubt that that will happen to you though. Unlike my parents who were living in smaller African countries and had pretty much no contact to modern German you'll always be connected to modern English due to communicating with your family via Internet and English speaking media. It might happen with social trends though. Maybe everyone will always start petting the table before they start eating in America and everyone will look at you weirdly once you visit and don't do that because you didn't learn it in Germany.
I actually don't see that difference as a negative point though. Working in the academic world means that I'm facing weird wordings on a daily basis so being used to that is actually an advantage.
Generally speaking being billingual is pretty cool. I think it's even cooler if it's two languages other than English (no offense) because one will learn English anyway making those people that grew up with Turkish and German e.g. trilingual which is even cooler.
My only advice is to look out for Jacks German in case you move back to America. It is uncreadibly easy to forget a language if you don't use it on a daily basis. My french was pretty much lost after a year of living in Germany after speaking it with all of my friends for 7 years as my first language. Don't make that mistake and always keep him in touch with German media.
I agree, languages evolve over time. I really learned English dub ing my stay abroad as an exchange student. The next four years I did not use it at all. During my study I read a lot and some of the documents were English, but I had hardly any usage of my speaking skills. Now in the times of YT I did have to learn lots of idioms to be able to talk and understand. And yes, I still use Plusquamperfekt
The German that will be spoken in our family is "froze in time" too, for we all have successfully completed a grammar school and afterwards we have realized our degree course. So our German will have little to do with this one spoken actually in this country.
As a Brit married to a German and living in Belgium, with two grown-up, bilingual (German/English) children, I can confidently say that you are on the right track! I am sure that the heritage language at home approach will work very well. We adopted the one parent, one language approach and were consistent about it and just let our children do their thing. We have the advantage that your mentioned of both speaking each other's language, so no-one was ever excluded from the conversation. I always spoke English to the children and their mother always spoke German. They understood both of us perfectly from the start, but at first spoke mainly German (Muttersprache!), with a bit of English (and French!) thrown in for good measure. I never insisted that they reply to me in English, but over time they began to speak more and more English until it began to seem strange to them to speak to me in German. It was a fascinating process. Don't worry if Jack speaks an alarming mishmash of English and German at first. It will sort itself out and will be a huge advantage for him later.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us! I really think this journey is going to be so fun and we are excited to see his language skills develop further. I think it is also super interesting for us to see how he begins to differentiate between the two. There are SO many words between English and German that sound extremely similar.
@@TypeAshton That is very true. It will be great fun. Do keep a notebook to jot down interesting (or funny) things that Jack says. It is a great way of keeping track of a bilingual child's linguistic development, and every parent should do it anyway so as not to forget the wonderful things their children say. I am very glad I did it now and my kids love to re-read it from time to time and have a good laugh!
Just wondering. Did you ever have the issue that the kids did not realize which language the was speaking outside of home?
Personally I encountered the situation with Friends of mine whom have two bi/trilingual boys.
Their kids sometimes have the issue that their kids reply or ask questions in Dutch or English to their Local teachers. Whom don’t speak Dutch or even are fluent in English.
The boys did not realize that they where not speaking the correct language. Creating the situation that the kids sometimes get (very) frustrated.
Was that not a issue?
(Personally, I am kinda lucky just dealing with 14yr old… whom is determined to make me speak Spanish. He only speaks English to avoid his grandparents 😬)
@@huubjoanfranssen8980 We live in Brussels and our children both went to a French-speaking kindergarten (école maternelle) between the age of 3 and 6, as we wanted them to have some exposure to one of the host country's languages as well as their parents' native languages. (Adding Dutch as well would simply have been too much.) So they were faced with two languages at home and another outside the home. I don't think they had any difficulty accepting that there were (at least) three different ways of speaking (i.e. languages). For them it was simply how things were. Children are all different of course and our son found coping with three languages simultaneously rather more difficult than our daughter, partly because he was at the time suffering from undiagnosed hearing problems. Fortunately their kindergarten was used to dealing with children of many different nationalities and language backgrounds, and the teachers were not too fazed by the children's initial struggles with French. For a while our children's (or at least our daughter's) French was better than their English, although German was still dominant. At 6 they moved on to the German-language section of one of Brussels' international schools, where some subjects were taught in English, and French was taught as a foreign language. They ended up bilingual in German and English, with fluent but non-native-level French. It wasn't without its problems, but it was worth it in the end. The early stages of multilingualism seem chaotic but it does sort itself out over time!
@@TypeAshton This made me think of 'false friends'. When I was learning English I learned that "to allow" means "erlauben". Next thing I was asking somebody for an allowance, assuming that meant "Erlaubnis". We needed some time to sort that out ...
Thanks for the overview! Me and my siblings were raised by the second method. My parents enforced only speaking English at home, while speaking German outside of our home. Even though both my parents could speak both languages. I am so thankful that they made the effort, because Englisch comes natural to us, while living in Germany.
Awe that is so great to hear that the method we would like to use with Jack was also successful for you growing up! Thanks for sharing your story.
Dear BFF, you cannot imagine how much I envy your little one - for his gift to be raised bilingual ! This is such a big opportunity, it's truly amazing.
I once was in Thailand, up in the northwest, where we stayed at a little resort which has been run by a thai-german family with two nice beautiful girls who came up to us when we had breakfast, starting a conversation in fluent perfect english, but as soon as they noiticed we spoke german with each other they switched immediateley to german as well, just instantly. As they both went to a thai school I'm sure they could also speak thai without any problem. And all this at an age of about maybe 10 years (the older one of the sisters), I was truly blown away by them...
I guess your approach is the best for your son, to speak english with him at home while leaving him talking german up to his environment. It'll be so cool to accompany him on his journey, so please keep on posting your interesting videos !!!
That's so incredible!
We are also thrilled to give Jack the opportunity to grow up bilingual. This is something we wish we could have done. Learning a foreign language as an adult is a very long and daunting endeavor.
Living in the USA, where languages are not valued at all, I brought up my daughter bilingually. Since my husband never learned German and the rest of his family was wondering why I even bothered, this was extremely difficult. I finally had some support when a German Saturday school opened and brought us into contact with likeminded people. Today, she speaks German fluently with an occasional grammatical error. My German nephew is totally bilingual because his parents spoke German exclusively at home after being transferred to the US. I taught at that Saturday school and experienced that children had no problem developing skills in two or three languages. Sometimes development was a bit delayed, but generally sorted before school age.
Hi,
We have been having the same approach with our daughter (4,5yr) for the past 1,5 yr and so far results are very satisfying. We have moved from Poland to Austria in 2020, my daughter spoke basic polish at that time. She has been attending to bilingual KG (german+english) since the move and now she switches between polish, german and english depending on the person she speaks to. Recently we bought 10 sessions of speach therapy (one session every 1-2 weeks) to help her construct longer sentences in german and funny enough it has not only actually helped with german but also has imprved her polish. For me it is very interesting to see how it is all connect for her, and how things just have multiple names.
Thank you for another great video. Best!
Wow, that's awesome! She is so lucky to be growing up with 3 languages.
I'm dutch and my late husband was too. We moved to Miami Fl. When my daughters were nearly 5 and nearly 4. This was in May 1985. Immediately working on their English skills I enrolled then into summerschool and while driving them overthere I had those read a long books with a cassette tape...look at the pictures, turn the page when the bell sounds...and me translating simultaneously.
Of course also a lot of sesame street and the electric company and Mr. Rogers ....by the time the schoolyear started they could function in English (Sept 1985). By first grade the were able to make the gifted programme.
After 4 years back to the Netherlands...English was kept very active because dutch TV has all films and series in the original version with subtitles. And we provided them with English books series like "Black beauty" or "sweet Valley twins"
Because we never ceased to talk to them in Dutch they were able to adapt seamlessly to dutch school.
Now...my oldest...in the meantime 42 and living in Madrid is married to a guy from Iran and my grandson, turned 4 this week, is speaking 4 languages...no problem at all. FARSI with his dad and the Persian family, dutch with his mom and me, Spanish in school partially, street etc. and English...because of all the UA-cam videos like baby shark etc.
Don't be afraid...it works out fine.
My best friend and his wife, both Germans, moved to Spain when their first daughter was one year old. Their second daughter was born in Spain. They only speak German at home and the girls went to Spanish schools and had Spanish and English friends. So the girls now speak all three languages fluently and switch without any effort. It just happened completely naturally. So my advice would be: don't overthink this. You basically would need to actively keep your child from learning a language it is exposed to.
I have met several people who grew up multilingual, several of whose only source of their native language was one of their parents, and they all ended up speaking both languages fluently. I think it's a great thing you're doing, and I'm absolutely certain that you don't need to worry about the outcome. Children are little learning machines, and he will easily achieve fluency in both languages if you provide him the opportunity.
As growing up being the child of a Flemish father and German mother, living in French speaking part of my country, I grew up being able to think in 3 different languages. This is for me the main point: the ability to think in any language, allows you to understand, speak and write in any language.
So three languages: Flemish, German and French. But you are writing in English. Doesn't that make four?
@@CrownRider English probably came later , in school; so not a language he grew up with, speaking or thinking in
@@AlexM-WI Got it.
@@CrownRider from TV at first, and off course school, work. But once you got the hang of thinking in multiple languages, you do exact that with new languages you learn
@@bartleekens3026 I understand. I'm Dutch and I have attended trade shows, where I was asked to translate German into English and vice versa. At the end of the day you are thinking in both languages, but not your own. It takes a few days before you're back to normal, whatever that is.
While watching, I started to write several lenghty paragraphs about what I learnt about language acquisition while studying linguistics. And, yeah, you don't "learn" your native language, you *acquire* it... However, this was a well researched video and almost all objections I would have raised were mentioned. Very well done! Only some minor additions:
Regarding the first approach you mentioned: the crucial point is that parents with different native languages are always consistent, i.e., they need to speak to *each other* in their respective native languages as well, at least while the child is within hearing distance.
"Learning" any language (don't matter if native or foreign) via TV is generally a bad idea because it lacks interactivity.
I also wouldn't recommend the third approach, at least not for L1: When linguists talk about the acquisition of language, they actually mean "determining the grammar of that language", i.e. gainig the capability to differenciate subtle judgements on grammaticality and semantics. For instance, native speakers know intuitively that "I know what Mary did" is okay, but "*I know that Mary did" is not, or why "Bob knows which picture of himself Charles posted after the conference" is ambiguous in a way that "Bob knows how proud of himself Charles was after the conference" is not. If the parents are not fluent in a language, they may not be able to use that language to a depth that would be necessary for the child to develop the ability to recognize those kind of subtleties. However, as an approach to learn a foreign language (i.e., a language learnt after a speaker's native langauge(s) is/are fully developed), this may work way better.
i am one of the kids growing up in a family that moved to other countries like you are now. ... as a small boy
i picked up the local language easely playing with the local kids around the neighborhood , so after a year i
was always taken by my mom to the market as a translator to the locals. this was before school so i could
not read the language but spoke it as well as the children my age. we left this country after four years into
another and after a few years another that my parents called home and i understood why. i met my grandparents and aunts and uncles. but what i am trying to say is i lost my first foreign language totally because i did not have a chance to use it.
you are doing the right thing in speaking english at home. your child will pick up german at kindergarten and
school so fast that you wont believe it, and he will be at home in both countries and maybe others to come lol
In our house (in Germany) it went like this with all of our kids, but most prominently with our 1st daughter because at the time at home only English could be heard:
with around 3 and a half she started Kindergarten purely speaking English. 3 months later her German was better than her English and she started to request movies to be shown in German on TV.
Hence my recommendation from my own experience:
you can absolutely relax, in the end it will work out, no matter what you do. Just be yourself and don't make a science project out of it, your son will do it his way, no matter what empiric scientific findings say. He'll speak English and German naturally and intuitively. If you interfere to much you can only jinx it.
All 3 of my kids speak perfect German and perfect English, despite never having lived longer in the US and despite basically zero effort of us lazy bones to worry about the issue in general.
Just expect the typical phenomenons with real bilingual children. He will have grammatical, semantical and ethymological Germanisms in his English and Anglizisms in his German - meaning here and there native English only or German only speakers will hear some cute little glitches (like a persistent english subject, verb, object word order in a german subordinate clause).
That's how it is. Not a lot you can do about it. I don't see it as a flaw, rather an asset: my kids have their own unique accent when they speak German and when they speak English.
I totally agree. Actually I love your point of view about it. German and English? Piece of cake (not the other way around, ie, being German parents in an English-speaking country). I strongly recommend your kids learning Spanish and French in the future. To me, anybody who speaks those 4 languages fluently (English, German, Spanish, French) deserves all my admiration.
@@enowilson Well once Jack enters secondary school he most likely is required to learn another foreign language (on top of English) anyways in order to be able to graduate from high school. In my case, which is the most common one nowadays I suspect, that was French (with many schools still offering Latin as another option) which was introduced in sixth grade (at about 11 years old). Often schools offer older students to pick up another foreign language in grade 10 (around age 15) which in my case was Spanish (but also can be Italian or even Greek or Hebrew sometimes). In that sense the German school system makes it easy to at least get a good foundation in all those languages. I was by no means fluent in Spanish when I finished high school but definitely so in English and French and refined my Spanish skills through stays abroad.
i think it‘s so great that Jack will grow up bilingual! in school I‘ve learned English (since the age of 8) and French (since the age of 12) but unfortunately I already start forgetting French grammar and structure… however, being bilingual offers so many possibilities not only in one‘s individual development but also when it comes to jobs.
Great vid as always, keep going :)
Thanks so much! The gift of gab with multiple languages is SUCH a wonderful life skill. We are so excited for the opportunities that it will provide him.
I studied language, and I think the decision to mostly speak the language you are most proficient in with your child (if they are still very young and have enough exposure to the language it will need to understand in day to day life in a specific country) is a good one. Young childrens' brains are so much more flexible than we often give them credit for.
And who knows, nothing is set in stone - my class in Grundschule had kids from many different nationalities, which meant a plethora of different languages when the parents came together, and by a certain age, the children were able to correct their parents' German. They knew the mother tongue of their parents well because it was what the parents used at home with them, and they knew German from pretty much every other aspect of everyday life, andmost of them were not confused by the differences, but enjoyed explaining them to others.
There are perhaps as many different approaches to this as there are families.
And may I just say, your "Was ist das?" was accent-free :)
Usually when parents speak the foreign language with their kids, the kids pick up a very heavy accent. I think that speaking the mother tonque at home is absolutely the right approach as the chances are high that the kids can then speak both languages free of any accent. Jack will learn german in school and from friends while learning english at home.
Again, another awesome, informative, and instructional video! While I commented on the last two videos in German I thought it might be better to write in English today as more of your followers will be able to read it. It came to me the last time that while I was writing my comment primarily for you there is a whole community out there that also reads comments, at least occasionally. So, I'm writing in English today!
I found your research into the various methods of raising a bilingual child very interesting and it brought up many memories for me. First, a bit about my own background: I was born in Hamburg, Germany. When I was two years old my family moved to Italy where I would spend by childhood (1963-1971). I went to one of the six European Schools (each member country of the "European Common Market" back then - Germany, France, Italy, Belgium, Netherlands, and Luxembourg - had one European School). I went to Pre-K, Kindergarten, and 1-4th Grade there. Then, when I was 11 years old we moved back to Germany. That's where I spent my teenage years and my early twenties. Then I moved to the United States, got married and had kids. As you can see from this life journey, I can relate in various different ways to your research:
My own experience in Italy and returning to Germany:
Since we were a fully German family living in Italy we only spoke German in the house. My parents were themselves in the process of learning Italian. My early expose was mostly to German at home but to Italian when I went with my mom to the market or other stores. When it was time for me to enter Pre-K at the European School I was enrolled in the German group. So I continued to have German as my predominant language at home and in school. The following year, in Kindergarten, I was placed in the French group. Now I was exposed to German at home, French in school, and Italian in the school yard and in town. When I got to first grade I was in my German homeroom for the core subjects (Reading, Writing, Math, etc), we had French as our second language (taught by a teacher from Paris), and subject such as Sports, Music, or Art the kids from the various language groups were mixed up together with the subject taught in the mother tongue of the teacher. So, besides having kids speaking all various mother languages I had Sports in Italian, Music in French, and Art in Dutch. In the school yard everything was Italian, of course. And I spoke Italian with the kids in our neighborhood when we played together outside the home. This continued through my fourth grade when we moved back to Germany.
What did that do to my language learning? Overall, I was exposed to multiple languages all at once when children absorb languages the best. I learned German with no problem (except for some vocabulary that our family adopted in Italian, and which I didn't learn in German until we moved back when I was eleven). I learned both Italian and French quite well for speaking and normal conversation. I only started learning reading and writing in Italian and French in third grade. The philosophy of the school was to raise us kids as European citizens who would be comfortable in all the main language of Europe (at the time, the U.K. and English was not part of that). I suppose, if we had stayed in Italy and I had continued at the European School through 12th grade I would have become fully fluent in all three languages. But moving back to Hamburg, Germany, when I was eleven left me stuck on the level of an 11-year-old in Italian and French. Back in Germany I actually felt a bit out of place because I was used to speaking German only at home and in school. It was strange to speak German even in the street or at the store. And I had to catch up with some German vocabulary that I had known only in Italian. I actually never learned any curse words in German. I only knew curse words in Italian.
In school in Germany, starting in fifth grade, I had Latin as foreign language. Knowing Italian was great as it was easy to learn Latin vocabulary. In 7th grade I finally got English too, which I hated and didn't want to learn... famous last words! But I started to loose my Italian a bit. French got a boost when it was added as a subject in school in 9th grade.
So, today, I am fully fluent in German, and I feel competent enough in Italian and French to get around in Italian and French speaking environments. I don't feel fully competent writing in Italian or French but it only takes me a few days to get back into it when I'm in those environments. When I hear or speak Italian I feel home!
Raising my children in the United States:
Today, I wish I had insisted more on speaking German to them when they were little. My wife was American who didn't speak German. Even though I was still in the process of fully learning English when I first came to the United States (1985) I quickly caught on. With my wife we spoke English exclusively. When the kids were born we only spoke English. I would only occasionally speak German with them when I put them to bed. I would sing German night-time songs to them until they fell asleep. And I would sometimes read German children's books to them. But pretty soon, in daily living, when I did speak German with them, they would say, "Papi, speak English!" When family came to visit from Germany I would, of course, speak German with them (which gave the kids some idea of what a German conversation could sound like) but everyone in my family also knew how to speak English so no one here in the U.S. had to try and speak German. My daughter really doesn't speak any German these days. She got enamored with Japan and now lives there as an English teacher learning Japanese. I'm trying to catch up with learning a bit of Japanese. My son did try to learn German on a few occasions. He is actually trying to speak sometime but is still quite rudimentary. He could probably pick up on it fairly quickly if he had a chance to live in Germany.
In retrospect, I wish I had asserted myself a bit more to speak German more often with the children. But it was hard when everything else surrounding was only English.
I think, that a number of the methods you mentioned in the video came through in my story, except that there wasn't really any method to any of my or my children's exposure. I would say that there was definitely a method employed by the European School in Italy, which would have been great if I had stayed at that school all the way to 12th grade. Some of my friends from that time are absolutely versatile in German, Italian, French, English, and Spanish.
Again, thank you for your great video. I hope my story was interesting and might have shed some light on the topic.
Wow what a wonderfully cultured experience you and your family has had in life! Your education sounds a lot like the French-German school which is here in Freiburg. We tried to look and see if there were any German-English schools in our area, but all we found was a private boarding school in the high Black Forest. From where we are today, I think it will probably work best if Jack is in a normal public school or a music school (depending on his interests). We hope that he picks up French as well since we love so close to the Alsace region. ❤️ Again, thank you for sharing your story with us!
@@TypeAshton Thank you for taking the time to read my long post. Yes, I agree that living in Freiburg you probably don’t want to go too far out of your way for Jack’s schooling. Sounds like a regular local German school would be the best choice. If I had gone to an Italian school I would definitely have learned Italian more deeply than I have. I seemed to remember that there is a European School in Karlsruhe, but while that’s not too far from you it would definitely be too far for send a young child to school. If you are more interested in the concept of the European School here’s a pretty good write-up about them on Wikipedia: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/European_School . I wish you the best in finding the best situation for Jack!
My wife and I have lived in Germany for over 30 years.My wife speaks French and English is my native language.When our children were small we never spoke German to our kids,we both spoke our seperate languages to them.They had no problems learning English, French and German.We worked in a Occupation where our colleagues came from all over the planet.It was noticeable that parents who were not native German speakers passed their imperfect German onto the kids.Up to about the age of 9 or 10 the 2 older children would only communicate with my wife in French and with me in English. German was something they just did without even thinking. As they got older they start talking to us in German, which I would say is their first language.Our youngest daughter however somehow picked that up from them would only converse with us in German when she was small.All of our kids speak and write all 3 language and it is quite normal that our conversations could jump threw all of these lauguages at the dinner table.I think you guys heading in the right direction. Jack's German skills will outpace yours in a remarkable short time.
Yes! We are noticing this too. We were really concerned that our "bad habits" with speaking German would negatively affect Jack. Of course, we are still continuing to improve our German - but we don't want to set up him from an early age with imperfect grammar. I think the best way forward for us to to keep speaking English and his school/community will help foster his German language skills.
@Afri- dancer "parents who were not native German speakers passed their imperfect German onto the kids"
Yes, so it can happen that the (especially young) children have more difficulties in the local language, just BECAUSE the parents, try (!) to talk to them in the local language. Hopefully this is not (anymore) recommended.
@@rrbth-handball-rules I think it was done with good intentions, people were less informed and desperate to integrate their families into German life.It still worked out for those kids though.Just like their parents they all moved on to have great lives.
If English is your native language then you would know that the word is through and not threw - sorry to be pedantic
While I can see your concerns I think at the beginning it is totally recommendable not to try an imperfect language on the kids. First because they learn something wrong and have to correct it. And as a second concern you as parents will develop your skills of the foreign language over time. So the later you start to also communicate in the foreign language the less errors you make and the less the kids get wrong examples.
But, and I think that goes along with the two languages method, once the basics are in and a social environment of native speakers has formed the kids will learn to differentiate between parent's German and German's German. Just as they know the languages apart. And that will help them to learn that there is not one German with one sound. Even if not the correct one. That is an early exposure to the fact that nothing is perfect.
I noticed that when I learned French in 10th grade at Gymansium (the German one). It was my third foreign language. First year we had one teacher. I got used to her pronunciaton. Next year another teacher. Took me some time to get used to his pronunciation. I think it was a good thing because we learned the variations. It was then easier to adopt to other speakers.
Hi Black Forest Family, I am a foreigner, my wife is a German. I already spoke about four or five languages before I moved to Germany more than a decade ago(without a German word at age around 25). Once I moved here, I went to a Volkhochschule and learned German for three straight months, 5 hours a day. I enrolled in a University and took German language full-time. A year after, I spoke in German fluently and about a year and a half, I could write in German grammars, went on to do postgraduates and find work before my studies officially completed. My two kids are fluent in both German and English, as I continued to speak with them in English all throughout the years since their birth. They are in Gymnasiums and taking up a third language in school. The point I wanted to contribute is, you do not have to care so much about Jack's German language skills. He will, either way, have both English and German his native language. The challenge is on both of you, and Jonathan. You continue to support Jack in his English skills, while do as much as you could to better your German language. Jack will be happy about this later when he will realize that you are learning the language he internally fully mastered as provisioned for by his interaction with the German environment since early age - he will perhaps correct your German skills at some stage lol..! (°_*). His brain is naturally evolving and adapting to German language and language's environment. This is my own experience with my kids (10 and 15 years respectively). Learning languages is fun ;-)
Both my parents spoke English to each other (and that was for them their 3rd language) and the only one they had in common, and I grew up with a rather funny English at home in a Spanish speaking environment. Mum found a bilingual school for me. I heard her speaking German with the dogs and on CB radio. I also learned a few rhymes and songs in German without really knowing what they meant. Emigrated to USA at 13. Then emigrated to Austria at 24, and when our child arrived, we decided to follow my parents example and speak English at home. Her first multi- word sentence at 14 mo. was mixed: "aber, I want some" 🙂. Eventually there was a lot less mixing.
I also bought books, music cassettes and videos that were in English (expensive way back then) and found an English play group for one afternoon a week. Funny enough the children all spoke German to each other in the play group but when they spoke to us parents, it was in English. It was very important for me to emphasize English in every day activities so that she could speak to our family with no hesitation. We couldn't afford the private bi-lingual school at that time, but if we could, I would have sent her there. Some of my friends said their children stopped speaking to them in English as soon as they realized mom or dad could soeak German anyway, so why bother... But for some, at school, their English came back and they began to use it at home again.
Now our daughter tutors children and adults in English.
Ok, here we go. I'm an American Ex-Pat, now Swiss citizen. My wife is a born and raised Swiss from the city of Bern. As you know, each town/regio has it's own sub-dialect of Swiss German. We met, married and started our family in the Basel area. And since she doesn't like English, we only speak Hochdeutsch with each other.
Our boss at the time at the Musik-Akademie der Stadt Basel is married to an American and she had just finished her PhD dissertation at the Univeristy of Basel as a linguist. Her dissertation was on bilingual families and how to raise bilingual kids. She said, the we should only speak our native tongue with the kids and not in our adopted language. That meant, that the kids would grow up hearing and then speaking Basel dialect with friends, speaking and hearing Bern dialect with my wife and English with me. My wife and I only speak Hochdeutsch with each other. You could make a case, that the kids were growing upquadrlingually = English, Hochdeutsch, Berndeutsch, Baseldeutsch.
All went well strictly following her advice, and it helped that I was a 50% stay-at-home Dad and my wife "only" worked 50% also. It was also clear, that the kids were not thrilled with speaking English with Dad, but we perservered and they had to stick it out. Then came the first trip to visit my mom in San Francisco. And there it happened:
"David, get out of the street, a car's coming".
DAVID, GET OUT of the STREET, a CAR'S coming!!!"
David, raus aus der Strasse, es kommt ein Auto!!"
That was when the kids "learned" that Dad could and would speak German with them if they toughed it out.
Fast forward ... My son graduated from University in Lausanne. So he did his undergraduate and then later graduate degree in French. He met and married his now wife, who is Iranian from Teheran and they live in Geneva. They speak English with each other, although she can now speak French.
My daughter, after graduating from Gymnasium, where she'd done an English Immersion course of study, did a 6 month stay in New Zealand where she met (her first) love of her life, a young man from Japan and they only spoke English with each other. But alas, that didn't work out. She's now an MD, married to a Chemist who is bilingual French/Spanish inasmuch as his parents are from Spain. They're bringing up their kids bilingually Baseldeutsch/Spanish. Both kids hear Hochdeutsch, as is usual in school, even if that school is Kita and Kinski. My wife and I only speak Berndeutsch/Hochdeutsch with them when we babysit them. We sometimes ask them what something is in Spanish. They speak Spanish with their Dad and with their grandparents from Fribourg when they visit with each other. French is, for now, a "Geheimsprache" (secret language) between my daughter and her husband. That'll work until they start French in elementary school as is customary here in Baselland.
So the linguist was only partly right. It turns out with us, with our kids and our grandkids, the kids can hear all sorts of languages and they'll sort it out themselves. Both our kids profited from the time I took speaking only English as both speak and understand decent English. Not quite bilingually. About as bilingual as I am after 46 years in Switzerland. Meaning: fluently, but not quite perfectly. I bet your kids will have a better grip on English because you both are English native speakers - different than in our case.
BTW - both kids ran into trouble in public schools, inasmuch as only British English was taught there at the time and they got stuff marked "wrong" when it was American English. "Do you have a pencil?" was marked wrong. "Have you got a pencil?" was what was expected. This changed for my daughter, when she did her English Immersion at Gymnasium.
I was born in 1961. Both my parents were Dutch and yet I'm almost fluent in English and I also speak German and some French. The reason why so many (over 90 percent) of Dutch people are able to speak English is because of our tv broadcasting system. All series, documentaries and movies are broadcast in the original language with Dutch subtitles. Because the vast majority of foreign tv programs in the Netherlands come from English speaking countries, Dutch children are confrontend with the English language from a very early age. Speaking English isn't a problem. The only thing is I don't do that very often in everyday life. As a result it sometimes takes me longer to form my phrases correctly or to find a specific word from memory. A typical case of 'use it or loose it'. That's why I watch and react to English spoken youtube videos. In the Dutch highschool curriculum English is mandatory. Our Dutch highschool system consists of several levels. In the middle and high level, besides English, a second foreign language is also mandatory. This has to be German or French. Of course outside the curriculum there's the opportunity to learn more languages voluntariliy.
I am English but have lived in the Netherlands for 35 years and so I speak Dutch during this time I have worked in Germany for 15 years while still living in the Netherlands and so speak German also, my partner is Dutch (Fries) she speaks Dutch Fries and German, her son speaks Dutch, and English most of which he has learned from the internet so it is more American, but not German; his girl friend is German and does not speak Dutch but does speak a different form of English to him. I can speak German but have not done so in this century colloquially.
Christmas when the family came together was somewhat eventful as some of us lost the ability to think in the language which we were either listening to or speaking at that point before switching to the next - alcohol does not help
i wish this also were the fact in germany. My passive english is quite good, but my active english (writing..speaking) is another thing. Ok..an addon point is, that i am born as a guy who isn't good in languages..even in my own language. But the TV thing would be a good thing in germany too. I once was in nepal, meet an old guy.
He spoke a very good german. He sold postcards and learned it through the contact with tourists..unbelievable. Another guy (also nepal ) told me, he learned his english as he watched tv cartoons :)
But the most impressed thing was a chinese math prof. He had his job in china and learned german in 3 month in the evening. Imagine..beeing a math prof ...and learning german in the evening after a hard day. He spoke a very..very good german. But i think he was an alien. He was so ingredible intelligent.
I am always amazed how well the dutch speak english. However, I think it is very important as well to safeguard and preserve the dutch language and culture. Doesn't need to be as extreme as the french do it, but when it's aout identity and all that it's really important.
That’s the way I learned Dutch. 😉 Growing up near Cologne we were able to get Dutch TV. While watching US TV shows in English I learned Dutch via the subtitles. and
Sehr gutes Video über dieses interessante Thema! Ich glaube, ihr habt die richtige Methode gewählt, weil sie am besten auf eure Situation passt.
Leider kann ich keine eigenen Erfahrungen beitragen, da wir England bzw. Frankreich verlassen haben, als unser Sohn gerade anfing zu sprechen, aber in den ersten zwei Jahren haben wir zuhause auch nur deutsch gesprochen, weil wir wussten, dass unser französisch zu schlecht war, um dies als Grundlage für die Sprachentwicklung unseres Sohnes nehmen zu können.
Ich wünsche euch viele gute Erfahrungen in dieser Hinsicht und bin gespannt, wie Jack reagiert, wenn er mal keine Lust hat, englisch zu sprechen, weil er weiß, dass ihr auch deutsch versteht.
Such a gift to be raised bilingual! It's incredible how much our thoughts are formed, restricted, and directed by the words available to us through our language. Jack's lucky to have great parents giving him such a wonderful start!
Thank you Gerad! Your little ones have also been REALLY taking to the German language as well. It is so neat to watch!
Hi Ashton,
I absolutely loved your video - it was super informative! 😊 Since the video is all about language, I thought I’d point out something I noticed: you say "for Jonathan and I" a few times, but the correct phrase is actually "for Jonathan and me." That’s because "me" is the object form of the pronoun, which you need after a preposition like "for." A good way to check is to drop "Jonathan" and see what sounds natural - you’d say "for me," not "for I." Hope that’s helpful! 😊
Keep up the amazing work, your content is fantastic! 🙌
This is by far the most positive comments Section in the whole UA-cam and I love it. :)
We really love this platform. ❤️❤️❤️
I was raised trilingual- in Australia, English at school, and Kroatien and German at home. It was never exclusive, at home both languages were spoken „ Kreuz und quer“. You can imagine that it was sometimes hard and weird…🙈
In the Netherlands most schools offer multiple language classes besides our native language (German French and English) but also more and more schools are starting English at a younger age (basisschool I believe). Being bilingual is a great asset and passing that on to our children is a great gift.
Thank you for making this video full of great information
There is also a French-German school in Freiburg (and I believe a private boarding school somewhere near by that focuses on English). We are looking forward to Jack being exposed to so many different languages and cultures from such a young age. Thanks for watching the video! We are so glad you enjoyed it.
@Black Forest Family to be fair, you make great videos on so many great subjects and for some reason getting a real "outsider" view of countries (I.e. not from a native) is so much more informative.
The only "negative" I can find with your channel is that you selected the wrong country to move to, but then again the Netherlands and Germany are nearly indistinguishable on a world map 😉
Looking forward to your next video.
Funny enough, we actually travel to the Netherlands often for Jonathan's work (typically Enschede or Amalo). It is so wonderful living in Europe and having so many different countries just a (relatively) short drive away!
@@awijntje14 She wanted to got to Dutchland, and then found herself in a country with an extra "e" and "s" ;)
Great video, thanks a lot, it was fun t watch. As a German, living in the bilingual city of Brussels with a partner who is originally Hungarian our future kids will have to deal with 5 languages (and it certainly doesn't help to shorten that list that we speak English at home, as her Dutch and my French are not that great yet).What helps us is that we have a lot of other couples where the kids are exposed to a greater number of languages around us, so hopefully we can pick up tricks where needed here and there.
To be fair, living in a place where language isn't as much a monlithical thing as Germany or the US we might have an advantage as well, there should be less cases of bullying or people thinking it is weird (and I happened to have friends my age who grew up in similair situations in Brussels 20 years ago, so we might even be able to draw on their experiences as well).
Hey to you three.
First - thank you for all of your well-researched Videos including sources and opinions stated clearly out.
Myself was raised trilingual - Greek, Italian and German. Back in the Days around the 90s the approach was that at home also the parents need to talk German. Hearing what you said I am happy that My parents didn’t follow it fully.
My mum spoke Italian with me - my dad spoke Greek with me so I was able to communicate fluently with all the people around.
But I can also say that it made a lot of things easier once my mum learned Greek besides her Italian mother tongue.
She was able to communicate also in Greek within the family nucleus.
Long story short the ability to get new language it somehow become type of my DNA.
But still today I need everytime some days of getting all my language skills back when I am for example in Greece or Italy but our brain is a powerful piece of evolutionary engineering. It will not forget a language but bring everything back in the “daily-use” part of our brain so we can access easier.
Same thing when I started my job back in the days for a sole English speaking company. It took me a while to get everything I learned in school back in my brain but once my brain accepted this fact it was easy to improve everything.
So yes apparently I can confirm all the scientific research that you did and I also can tell you that your effort is amazing and that finally you don’t need to be scared for what might come.
It is very helpful to know different languages and it makes it easier to adapt to new cultures.
But there is one caveat on that point which I see in myself. Depending which language I speak to some extend my own character on views on things may slightly vary.
Example - Mediterranean slow life vs. German high productivity. Here you may see big variations when I think about a problem or solution in German or in Italian/Greek.
Anyway thanks again for this good content.
Keep doing what you doing
That is SO cool. Our good friends are raising their daughter to speak Lithuanian, Dutch and German and it is SO amazing to see little ones take on languages so easily. It will undoubtably be a wonderful skill to have in the future. It sounds like your language environment was so enriching.
My experience is that you should talk with your child in your mother tongue, as you would not teach mistakes you are prone to in foreign languages. I am German, but my wife comes from Vietnam. We talk to the children in our mother tongue only, but my wife and me communicate in english. As the school language is also english, my children grew up with 3 languages, which they all master. Difficulties arose only, when the vocabulary in one language did not yet include a representation in the other languages. I discovered, that German language does contain many more words then English or Vietnamese. Always interesting to work this out :-)
Hi Ashton,
as always, a very well researched and well presented video.
After a minute or so, I thought (not for the first time) you really should teach at university, and what a loss it would be if you didn't. Well, given how hard the German system makes it for people to enter that career, it's sad that it probably won't happen. But still...
On another note, at the end, when you showed the books, I wondered if you aren't overdoing it a bit. When I see a book about child development that has the word "optimizing" in it, the alarm bell starts ringing. Such a title implies a very American thinking, and it raises images in my head of prenatal music courses, a rigorous schedule of preschooling, a full calendar of courses here and courses there, and helicopter parents that drown their children in pressure.
Now, I'm generalizing unduely, of course, and you are surely quite self-reflecting and probably won't fall into that trap so easily. But what I actually want to say is this. You can't plan everything, and though it is typical for first time parents to try ;-), it will all just work out quite naturally. Jack will learn both languages natively, whether you follow any of theses guides or not. With the second child, you will be much more relaxed, and they'll turn out perfectly fine. That's an experience parents have made from the beginning of time. :-)
Take care!
Thank you for this very interesting, informative, and well researched video.
The only advice I can offer you, is to not put too much pressure on yourself. It will work out in the end.
I myself am bilingual, my mom is German and my dad is American and I grew up on both continents, however my son is growing up in Germany and my husband is German. So when our son was small, we practiced method one: Me & my dad spoke exclusively English with him and my husband & his family spoke German and the Kita spoke German as well. Every book we read or tv show we watched however was only in English, even my husband read him books in English. Our kiddo understood both languages without any trouble, but he spoke only German. At around age 1 1/2 his language skills kicked in and he had a best friend at Kita. Turns out, the other little boy had the same bilingual learning experience growing up, his mom is a Brit, and he also only spoke German. However they quickly caught on that they could use English as a secret language when at Kita. For instance when they saw an opening at the Playmobil Burg, they would whisper “castle” to each other and race there to get the free spot, before any of the other kids caught on. When he started German school, I started to speak in both languages with him. For me, family life is just easier if you speak the language of the land you live in (in other words,I got lazy). Fast forward, he is 17 now and my son is fluent in both languages. English is not as dominant because he learned reading and writing in English at German school starting in 5th grade, but he has no trouble switching between languages and adapting easily when in situations with people who only speak one of both languages. He is also a fairly decent translater between the two. It also helps that his complete media intake (UA-cam ,TikTok, Animes, playing video games online with people all over the world, and whatever else he does) is all in English.
With such caring and thoughtful parents, your son will grow up learning the languages of both worlds in no time. It is an invaluable gift, at least in my experience as it has been, that you are giving your son and I applaud you for putting in the extra effort to do so.
so glad you enjoyed the video! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences! We totally agree, the exposure to so many languages is such a wonderful gift. We are so excited for him.
We mowed from Germany to Norway when my kids were 5 and 7 a long time ago. In the beginning we where speaking German at home and Norwegian outside the home. eventually one teacher said "let the kids always speak the language they are most comfortable with.".
We used that approach from then on. Each of them came home one day and spoke Norwegian to oss. They did it ever since. Today we speak Norwegian each other and to our kids and German when German people are around. And English if necessary.
Another question. Why do you Americans keep calling your selv expats? you are immigrants to Germany.
Very nice video. We went through the first and second strategy with our children (especially with the older one). My wife is Czech, I am Slovak, the languages are quite simillar but not the same. Kids were born in Czechia, so we started with the first strategy, me speaking exclusively Slovak to them, my wife exclusively Czech, and by the age of 2 the older one was able to speak both languages and even switching them seamlessly according to whom he was speaking to.
Then, when boys were not yet 4 and 2, we moved to the German speaking part of Switzerland (actually quite close to you, just next to Basel), and as the older one was about to start to go to kindergarten, we got the advice to use the second (the Heritage language) strategy. And it worked very well (eventually, there were some hiccups of course), they are now (after almost 10 years here in Switzerland) fluent in Czech, Slovak, High German and Swiss German, as well as very good at French (taught in school) and English (taught in school, too, but exposed to it at home, as we have been watching English TV channels at home from the beginning, because my wife wasn't speaking any German when we moved here).
So I strongly believe rising your kids bilingual can help them to become multilingual eventually, as I know some other bilingual families, and for their kids learning a new language is usually quite easy.
Wow that is AMAZING. That is so impressive. One of the things we love so much about living in Germany is the exposure to languages that Jack will experience. It is so different from the environment in which we were raised.
Thank you so much Ashton for discussing this topic. I will be sharing this one with my Aussie daughter who moved to Germany just over a year ago to be with her British boyfriend living in Germany . She is in what I call a modern family situation. Her boyfriend has a daughter that is German born and is bilingual in English and German . I wonder which method was used in her early years prior to school. Thank you for the references as well, this is definitely worth giving some serious thought to. I’d better brush up on my German phrases too in readiness for my bilingual grandchildren ha! ha!
danke und eine schöne woche. so schön, den kleinen Jack wiederzusehen ( I cheated lol 😂) not that clever……yet!
so glad you enjoyed it! Making this video was a big learning experience for me too and I really enjoyed making it!
Hi Ashton, I assume that because of your scientific background, you approach the topic of bilingualism very rationally. You have informed yourself about the different methods and weighed up the respective pros and cons. What more could you want? I have a good feeling that you found the optimal method for Jack.
I was a stay at home English speaking mother to our now 22 year old son (my husband is German). We used approach 1. When he started Kita with 3, he would tell me about his day in German. New experiences that maybe he didn't have an English vocabulary for?? At pre-teen he stopped talking English with me. I still spoke only English to him (still do) and he usually answers in German. But somewhere late teens it became "cool" to speak English and he uses it with his German friends as well. Now as a young adult, he reads English books most of the time, and speaks fluently. My Canadian relatives say they can hear a slight German accent/tone fall when he speaks but I think that is quite understandable. I think your biggest challenge will be the balance with your German.
Wow this was SUPER interesting to read! Thank you so much for sharing your story. We also wondered how Jack's view of speaking English over time will change (whether it is 'cool' or not). We are also interested to see whether or not he will develop an accent (I kind of think he will). I read once that kids learn dialect from their friends, not their family. Which kind of makes sense because my cousin grew up in New York and has a thick NYC accent, even though his mom does not. It will be interesting to se how his language skills progress!
@@TypeAshton 😄My son speaks perfect Hochdeutsch and only switches to Badisch when he wants to bug me since he knows I have problems - still - understanding Dialekt.
I am always impressed. You pick up a topic in get into it so deep, structured and in a scientific way. It seems to be your habbit, to learn and understand each topic to the max possible way. And yes, kids learn foreign language very fast in Kita, school, with other kids,... in a natural way. It's quite natural for them and no "work".
Thank you so much. We are so glad you enjoy our videos. ❤️
I‘m also thrilled for Jack. These days, even if you would move back to America, he (and you) can keep the language fresh by watching films. That’s what I do with Italian. And absolutely, perfect English spoken at home and perfect German in his out of home environment is … well perfect 👍 I‘ve often wondered if my husband should speak German or English if we had a child, and I think German so that the language absorbed is correct. This has been my favourite video apart from when you said you finished your PhD!
Great video, and some great thoughts and tips!
Before we moved over here to Germany, we decided to use the "Heritage" language approach. Our four kids are learning German in the schools and in our city, but we wanted to make sure that they maintain and use their English skills as well. I feel the hardest thing for me is that I don't know how good my kids' German skills really are! I know they are doing well because of their schooling (and the older ones can get around in the city and shop and all of that), but it's strange not hearing them speak German. And I agree that it's hard not being able to practice our own German in our house - I have to make sure I continue to make opportunities to speak with my German friends in German to get that extra practice!
We are also SUPER curious what it's going to be like once Jack starts reading/writing in German. One of our good friends from the US posted a funny picture of their son's journaling (funny because there are some cute misspellings due to phonetics) - it is going to be a whole different deciphering puzzle for us to understand his German. 😂
@@TypeAshton add to that the fact that (at least here in Leipzig) they make the kids write in cursive, reading some of the homework has been an adventure!
Oh man I can imagine! 🧐
My sister (German) has married a Spanish man and moved to Norway for good when their son turned two. My Sister spoke German to him, my brother-in-law Spanish, and his friends obviously Norwegian. My sister and her husband arbitrarily switched between Spanish and German. So little Axel grew up with three languages, actually with four, since English is a major school subject in Norway - and he struggled. He started late to speak at all, and he always had problems to express himself. He is now in his twenties and a successful IT-programmer in Norway, but up to this day he has problems expressing himself in German, Spanish or English, his language of choice obviously is Norwegian, and since I can't speak Norwegian I can't assess his eloquence in that language.
If you want to raise your son bi-lingual, I definitely would support the heritage approach. Don't bother about reading and writing, he will learn that in school very well. The disadvantage of this approach is, that you yourself will not really master German ever. To achieve this, you need to make German your first language, and with the heritage approach you won't do that. As soon as you start speaking German at home, Jack will not learn English on a native basis. The question is, if that is really a missed chance. He still will grow up with some English around him and most likely always be better in English classes in school than his class mates. He will be very good in English as his second language, but not really bi-lingual in the sense, that he will speak English truly as well as German. The question is - is being able to speak English as a second language really good not enough?
As a German/Dutch family, living in Germany. We speak Dutch, my mother tongue, at home since my husband speaks a pretty good Dutch. It is our family language, only when German speaking people are with us, we do speak German. Our children learned German from opa and oma, school etc. When they were still little, we went to the US for nearly one year. They went to school and kindergarten and learned english. In this year we didn't speak German, but when we came back they picked it up right away. Our daughter of 7 even changed her German handwriting to American and coming back she used the German again. Since this time in the US english was a third language in our family and I have to be honest, we do mix up the languages sometimes. Later we moved, we lived close to the Dutch border and our children all studied in english at the Dutch universities. Our youngest went after 4 year Grundschule to the 5th class of a Dutch primary school which is six years. It is true, they could speak Dutch, could read it, but writing was more difficult. Now they are adults they can write Dutch, but I still need to correct them sometimes, but it is no problem. They are so thankful that we raised them tri-langual. It is one of the best gifts you can give your child. ☺.My advice: just relax, sometimes the language our child speaks looks a little 'messy', and maybe it looks like Jack is 'behind' in its language development but at the end it will work out well. Children are so flexible!
I'm speechless. what an effort to read and learn all those things. i am an elementary school teacher in a poor part of town. you can find people who are living here for 30 y and more, but they can't speak or understand german very well. my students are from everywhere, only two are germans. some of them can't comunicate at all. they all live in germany for a few hours a day, they don't need the language and some will never learn. your very intellectual approach is rarely to be found, I only have one set of parents in my class with a university level of education. they do so much for their son, visiting sites and museums and zoos. others rarely do that. with a heavy heart I wish you could adopt them all and show them the way to live a better life. your son is a lucky guy.
Awe thank you so much. We feel so lucky to live in this part of the world and want to see/do/experience all of it with Jack. ❤️
-flawlessly, without any hiccups or problems. Now we use as a form of therapy and he is reading the newspapers in both languages and books. He has improved verbally, reading and his writing is normal in his native language and have spelling issues in the other but his english spelling issues are words that sounds the same but spelled differently (example:meet & meat ) that kind of thing. Knowing more than one language could delay deterioration in dementia and Alzheimer's disease. I think the reason why is you are using your brain more, by more I mean differently, like an old fashioned switch with a string you pull on. When you are speaking your native language there's no effort because it's natural reflex for you but you switch to another language, it's like yanking on the string light. It takes effort and forces you to use your brain in a different way and switching often ( every other paragraph of a conversation), keeps not only working more but keeping it sharp. That is our family's hope anyway. So far so good. Who knows?it might be a key that leads somewhere or just delaying it. At this point we take what we can get. I love being trilingual and my hope to learn another.
So we're also an English speaking family with a different community language, and we also speak just English at home, with most of the kids' second language exposure being from school and the community. My kids are older, though (primary school age), so we've relaxed some aspects. We definitely take part in conversations in the local language together when there are locals who don't speak English present. Eg neighbouring kids, at the doctor - although many of these do speak English - etc. We also started reading to the kids in both languages, not just English, for vocabulary and to promote both as fun to read. The vocab was particularly relevant relatively early. We realised that our kids were missing a lot of "home" vocab in the local language, (and honestly so were we) so we particularly looked out for kids vocab books locally on everything from kitchen appliances to body parts. It's important for a child to be able to describe their body accurately to the doctor if they have a pain, or hopefully never in the case of assault, thus a bilingual child needs to know how to say "waist", "ribs", "ankles", private parts etc in both languages.
Wow. What an efford. What a lot of background work, scientific research. I somehow felt like listening to a well structured scientific lecture at a university. Chapeau, Ashton.
Let me tell you for sure: Jack will be fluently in both languages, German and English, and he will distinguish between how to address people more or less "without thinking" - see his first sentence. He just noticed instinctively that he had to address his nanny in German because she only speaks German with him.
Let me tell you a good example: Some friends of us have the following situation: He is German, she is a late patriate from Russia who came to Germany at an age of 12. Her parents, however, can't speak German very well and therefore stick to Russian.
Their 3 children speak only Russian with their grandparents, they switch between Russian and German speaking with their mother and speak only German with their father. Outside their family they of course use German with the side effect that this is now their mother tongue and they can speak Russian pretty well but not write it due to the Cyrillic alphabet.
Speaking only English at home will manifest the awareness in Jack that you are American and the rest of the world is different. And he soon might trick you using German if he doesn't know the English word for something. So, to sum it up, I guess something like the "Everyone participates" method is the right one to help Jack being bilingual and you as parents as well to improve your command of German.
Anyway, I know you will do the right thing. I love your channel.
My English teachers wife is French. They have two kids. They have come up with a "Language rule" - two days a week they speak English, two days French, two days German. And on Sunday everyone has his own choice of language. :)
That is super interesting! I bet that is a really fun and interactive way to practice language skills. Perhaps when Jack is older and English is well established we can switch to something like this so Jonathan and I can work on our German skills.
@@TypeAshton But as the language of the school will gradually predominate, you may need to compensate more in your maternal language. I've personally experiment that, my kids avoiding to reply in English to their father and choose to speak to me instead in french. He impose a new rule, only speaking English at home when it's only us. They even had to speak to me in English, but I replied in french ( never spoke English with my husband and with them and my husband spoke only french to me).
We had a motorized satellite dish, so we could watch British TV, they watch very few french kids TV. They still have the habit to choose to watch films in original version.
Very practical this satellite dish ! When they grow up and learn German at school, I even choose sometimes the Kika channel ! 😆
I was born in Germany. In 1952 my father took a job in Argentina. The family, my father my mother, myself (age 8), my brother (age 6) and my baby brother (age 3) spoke no Spanish. Arriving in Argentina, we had several weeks of basic language training to be able to get by. My father was working with some other Germans so at least he had the opportunity to communicate outside the family. My mother and we children did not have that opportunity. My mother was teaching herself Spanish with the help of our Spanish speaking maid and we two eldest children went to public school. Initially we spoke no Spanish and they spoke no German. We had some fights due to misunderstandings. At home we spoke German so as not to forget. Books were a great help. I was told that four years later, we children spoke essentially accent free Spanish.
In 1956, my father's contract ended. Work was still hard to find in Germany so we moved to the USA. Again, no one in the family spoke English. The situation was similar. My father was able to speak German at work and the rest of us were left to fend for ourselves. We spoke German at home but English at other times.
In my opinion, based on my experience, the best way to learn a language is through deep immersion. I took two years of French in high school but basically could survive. My father was never fluent in English, he tended to slip in Spanish and German words. The rest of us were often asked where we came from because they could not place our accents. My middle brother had the opportunity to work with a German company and travelled often to Germany while I had the opportunity to work with some Spanish speaking individuals. Other than a limited technical vocabulary, I was able to communicate easily. The three of us boys spoke German with our parents but after their passing spoke primary English among ourselves
Hola soy un Argentino (y Americano) viviendo en Alemania. Muy interesante la historia de Usted! Saludos desde Alemania! Viele Grüße!
I believe its gonna be alright. My sister and me are both raised in German and English language. Having a foreigner Mother helped alot. Its sometimes hard for me to remember a specific word in German or English. Which sometimes mess up my speech. Living in Germany also has its benefit living near all kinds of foreigner languages and it shows in our school too. I had a really diverse school class, from Turkish to Russian People. My best Friends have Polish Origin and it shows in my life. I cannot speak Polish but there are words that influenced my speech. So don't get confused if your son learns some specific words in a complete different language later in school :D
Hi great video again!! Use your natural one at home. English it is. Rest is up to the child and believe me he will asthonish you both. Please don't compare him to yourself If you're not raised mulii languaged.But I saw already in the comments that each child is different in this as you may find out some day :-) My parents only spoke Dutch, but school system in the Netherlands forces you to learn other ones. As mentioned English is mandatory. I speak and write English and German (also worked there). Understand and speak French, speak Thai (talking about hard language to learn....) badly but can understand it. Studied some years Latin in school, understanding Italian and Spanish isn't that hard if people don't speak to fast. Am I a language guy, no I'm not. It was and still is hard work but I enjoy it! but I had and took the time, for math and other things we're easy for me. My kids are born and raised in the Netherlands with a Thai mother ( speaking Thai to them in the kids younger years) strangely my daughter has big issues with Dutch grammar, speaking ok and speaks fluent Thai (without any lessons and see can't read it) The family and friends there are always amazed if we're there or on an Internet call. I've had her tested and the outcome wasn't a shock: Thai is her "motherlanguage" and yes Dutch language and grammar is hard to learn. Now she's almost a flight attendent, with proper English C1 level and yes German too. She didn't have German before in school, but I helped her by reading German books together and listen to German music. My younger son is quite different. Hardly speaks and understands Thai but also has problems with Dutch grammar. Also tested and his mother language is English ?! Age 13 already C1 level and C2 won't be an issue. With him I'm reading English books but his world is English. Gaming with other children around the world, speaking English. All programming computers, English. Loking movies and listen music, English. First year French in school was horrible, but with some help now second year he's doing quite ok and now first year German also no problems. My advice, be aware on the (German) grammar part. Ask teachers to monitor that and may be in time extra lessons. Speaking won't be an issue growing up in a German setting. Speaking German and English will be normal for him.It's his world. Second advice is playing music at home works great! Or youtube with different subtitles! I listen to English and later on to German music (my choice and started with it under age of 10) I hardly ever hear my children listen to Dutch music, English it is and I'm stimulating German and French music, youtube rules. So don't worry too much and also not on which system to use. Be yourselves and speak your native language and good luck learning German !
Hi Ashton I think your totally on the right way. I think your son won't have any Problems to become bilingual when you speak English to hin at Home. He will learn German automatically when he comes to kita or Kindergarten. Remembering when I was a Young boy both of my parents were German. So I learned English in school I am grown up in a small City with a big Group of US military forces nearby to the former border of East Germany. Additionaly I was a short wave listener and I am following many English Broadcasting Services from all over the World, Voice of America, BBC, Voice of South Africa. It was an absolute Highlight when you had been able to receive Broadcasting services from Australia or New Zealand. It was so exciting to get World News from all these Broadcasting services. So I think my unterstanding of the English language is quiet good. My wrting I don't know, you can judge in it 😄😄😄😄😄😄 Unfortunately in my estimation my knowledge of speaking could be better.In my job I had to speak English but Not frequently.. But I am convinced I am able tol become absolute fluency when I get a Daily exposure to the English language and I am forced to speak on a Daily Basis. So long Story short you needn't to be afraid your so'n will learn both languages automatically. And I am going on to follow your Videos in oder to keep my English state of the art 😄😄😄🤩🤩🤩🤩👍👍👍👍 good luck to you.
We're thrilled you enjoy our videos. Thank you so much for sharing your experience! Your english reads very well. 😉
Im German, living in Canada. My kids (8/11) only speak German at home since they were born. They are fluent in English and German. Its a gift. And you don't need a strategy, don't overthink it, just do whatever you feel is best.
Hi,
I stumbled on to your UA-cam channel and after seeing this video thought I would share my own personal experience.
I am the oldest of 5 boys. In 1980 my family moved to Metzingen, Germany which is located about 45 minutes south of Stuttgart. We planned on staying for 3 years during which time my dad worked for a German company. At the time the ages of myself and my brothers was 16, 15, 14, 10 and 8. We were NOT associated with the military, so the only option my parents had was to send us to German schools. I attended the Technisches Gymnasium, two of my brothers attended the Real Schule, one brother attended the standard Gymnasium, and my youngest brother attended the Grund Schule. I will be honest, the first year was TOUGH. Although we did take some German language lessons at the German American Institute in Tübingen, we were basically dropped off at school on the first day and told "good luck" by our parents. It was akin to being thrown into the deep end of the pool when you never learned how to swim.
We all struggled that first year, HOWEVER at about the 6 month mark something happened. We all started to learn enough German that we understood our classwork. We started to make friends, and we all started to settle in. We had a lot of good experiences in the second half of the first year, which changed our attitudes for the remainder of our 3 year stay. We did, however, have some setbacks. Only one of us was able to make it through our stay without the need to repeat a grade. If you haven't encountered this yet, it was NOT uncommon for kids in Germany to repeat a school year, especially in the upper grades. When we lived there, if you failed one class you repeated the whole year. We also attended school on 2 Saturday's in the month. I am not sure if that is still common.
Our German skills progressed quite quickly after the first 6 months even though we spoke only English at home. The decision to speak only English was partly practical and partly choice. My parents had a much tougher time learning German and they were never comfortable speaking German with their children. Also, remember this was before the internet. We were in a village where NO ONE spoke English, and we had no other outlet. Once we left the door, we only spoke German. Home was our American oasis. Lastly, in spite of the fact that we were fluent in German, we never felt comfortable speaking German with one another. We knew each other in English, not German. It was an issue of comfort.
By the time we finished our stay my youngest brother spoke fluent Schwäbisch, not Hoch Deutsch. The rest of us spoke Hoch Deutsch with a thick Schwäbisch accent. Also, my youngest brother, who was 11 years old by this time, spoke a mixture of German and English. It was analogous to Spanglish (if you get my drift). The funny thing is that none of us realized this. We could switch between English and German effortlessly, so we understood everything he said. It was only when we returned to the US and people would ask us what my brother was saying that we realized he was speaking a a mixture of German and English.
This was nearly 40 years ago, and yet 4 of us still speak German (albeit a bit rusty and dated). My youngest brother, unfortunately, was too young to retain the German. Ironically, though, if he reads some German text he still speaks with a Schwäbisch accent. We made great friends and had a wonderful, memorable time. It was the most defining time in our lives. I wouldn't trade if for anything.
I applaud your decision to raise your son bilingual. Let's be clear your son will probably learn at least one other EU language in school and will be quite proficient by the time he finishes school, so he might even be trilingual. My only advice is that you start teaching your son English grammar and spelling on your own. I say this from another experience. Later in life I married a woman from Mexico. Our two children speak Spanish quite well, but they didn't learn about Spanish grammar and spelling until they learned it in High School. That is a bit late in my opinion. The earlier you learn the more natural it will feel later in life.
Best of luck on your adventure.
Extremely research-based - a good expression to describe your videos! (In case it‘s not clear, that‘s a compliment!)
A good friend of mine (herself with a German mother/English father; grew up in England with frequent visits to Germany) married a German and has always lived in Germany from her early 20s. They raised their 2 children with the „each parent speaks his/her native language only“ method, and she‘s doing that with her grandchildren now. Her 2 sons are of course fluent in both languages, but I am very aware that their English is „less refined“ because they did not go through the educational process with that language.
Many funny stories while they were growing up, but this one is especially good. I was visiting one day and the younger son asked me to read a story to him (he loved being read to). It happened to be a German book, and I ended up reading several of them to him (he kept saying, „More!“). When we stopped, he went to his mother and asked quizzically: „Does Michael speak German?“ She laughed and asked him what language I had been reading to him for the last hour!
That is soooo interesting! I am also curious at what age Jack will fully understand that "mommy and daddy speak English". Although the other day, we were told by our Kita that two delivery men came and were speaking English to each other. Jack immediately jumped up and ran to the door and started babbling at them. They said it really looked like he wanted to talk to them and it was as if he understood that their words sound like mommy and daddy's words.
I was an exchange student as a teen where I truly learned my second language, Dutch. Prior to that I'd had classes in Spanish, Latin, and American Sign Language (ASL), but I only knew some basic grammar and a range phrases. As I met students or adults from abroad in my home town, I'd pick up a little from time to time. Once immersed as an exchange student, I had siblings around my age and a younger sibling. My host parents and the older children could speak a range of English with me as I was stumbling through learning theirs. One etiquette adults use at parties with young children is to speak in English to have a more private conversation since English is taught formally in middle and high school (post elementary grades or approximately ages 12-18). Since my little host sister was learning "too much" English from hearing conversations with me, I was encouraged to speak Dutch at home as soon as possible. This started with a hour at supper time followed by an hour of my choice and an additional hour the next month. I played many board and card games with my siblings. When we visited younger cousins, all the children played Animal Barnyard where each person makes the animal sound in the dark. I quickly learned new common sounds for a dog, bird, chicken, and so on that I wouldn't be so easy to identify. I bought discarded children's books from the library for my family in the U.S. but I found several challenges to share this language with them as I couldn't transport the immersion experience. With one of my siblings, I attended a high school where nearly all of the classes were in Dutch. Some of the teachers encouraged me to use English but I found it too confusing, like grinding gears in a car. My English class was British English and literature where I became aware of vocabulary I had overlooked and the many similarities of Dutch and American English. I also learned a little Dutch sign language which is based on ASL. My host family enjoyed traveling on holidays and hosting people during my stay. Once heard a church service in Dutch and German. As a college student in the U.S. I took immersive German classes. One of the fluent German speaking American students commented that I had a Dutch accent when I spoke German. I'm a mom now and share my experiences and challenges with my kids. There isn't a perfect way to learn except that consistent good exposure makes it far easier than lessons for a class as one's sole exposure. Today we can access movies at home if there are subtitles or other languages on the dvd and UA-cam channels of topics which interest us and our children.
Young children learn languages so easy - its really fascinating. I remember the times when I was a student. There was a pizzaria at the campus. The Owner was italian, his wife was from the US and his 4 year old daughter grew up here in germany. Every time we sat at the bar for an espresso and his daughter came around and spoke to everyone, she swtiched permanently between english (speaking with her mother), to italian (speaking with her dad) and to germany (speaking with me and my friends) - she did this without even thinking about it. Everything fluent of course :)
Oh, boy, Ashton, this could be a long post. My wife and I had been living in Germany for 5 (7) years when the boys came along. She never learned accent-free English; I never learned overly grammatical German. We didn't have any language-learning theories or strategies, and at home we switched from E to D and back again depending on topic, mood, time of day, whatever. In the Kita and at school, they learned German, natch. And then, there were annual vacations in the States. The older boy, more "European" in temperament (he refused my offer of a junior year in the U.S. because Americans are "superficial") now teaches high-school math in California. The "American" boy not only took me up on the junior year, but went back to attend a U.S. military university. But he then spent years doing development / humanitarian relief work all over the world and now runs a Dresden-based NGO. Hooda thot? So just do everything you can to open / keep open every possible option, and they'll find their own way. Sooner or later. But it can be pure hell watching them try.
Now, Ashton, I have a bone to pick with you. Before worrying about Jack's language development, please try to square away your own English. I mean the pronouns. I mean the "I". All of your vids offer examples, but in this one, it starts at 0:56: "...challenging for Johnathan and I...". That's just wrong! You wouldn't say "...challenging for I...", would you? No, it's ME: challenging for me, and challenging for Johnathan and me. And sad to say, you are a serial offender: three times in the intro alone, and your other vids are rife with similar mistakes. Oh, you're in good company: Myth-Buster Adam Savage loves to do this, and Obama was was very gratified when, after the election, "W" invited "Michelle and I to the White House for coffee". But it was wrong for them, it's wrong for you, and please don't pass this habit along to Jack! -- So now, I've said my piece. Still friends?
Hi there. You are absolutely right... grammatically there are instances where it would have been correct to say "Jonathan and ME". However, like the examples you provided... this is an extremely common grammatical "error" that I would not be surprised if the majority of Americans do it. It is just one of those things that when hearing the "correct" sentence, it sounds "icky" - if that makes sense?
I fully agree with your approach.
Wie immer ein sehr interessantes Video! Was mich an meine Kindheit erinnert hat, warum weil ich Spanier bin und in Deutschland geboren wurde.
Meine Eltern haben die Methode gewählt das jeder eine Sprache spricht . Mein Vater Deutsch, weil er es besser sprach, meine Mutter spanisch.
Was dann, laut meiner Mutter, zu einer interessanten Situation führte. Wurde ich von meinem Vater gefragt auf Deutsch, antwortete ich auf Spanisch und bei meiner Mutter dann genau anders.
Dazu muss ich aber auch anführen das ich zwei Schulen besucht habe morgens die Deutsche Schule und 2 mal die Woche Nachmittags Spanischen Unterricht.
Mit 55 Jahren bin ich mittlerweile in 4 Sprachen Fit genug um als " Native Speaker" zu gelten.
Macht weiter so und informiert uns über die Unterschiede in den Kulturkreisen.
My husband is Austrian and I'm Danish, our common language is English, so our children grew up trilingual. Since we live in Denmark all three children learned Danish in the school from Kindergarten class. From 4th grade they learned English and from 7th grade they also had German classes. So visiting my in-Laws in Vienna they learned the 3rd language is very usefull.
Hats off to all the work and effort you put into your videos...the academic background clearly shows;)
Maybe a second PhD down the road?
Check out the videos from My Merry Messy Life of the McFalls family, they moved to Germany with four kids.
Yes! We connect with Sarah often. They have such a great story.
It can't be wrong to give children the opportunity to learn something with fun at an early age and to challenge it in an age-appropriate way, which of course always depends a bit on the individual child. Especially when it comes to languages, it is actually good to use different possibilities, if a child shows serious interest in it, then definitely support it. Any language that I speak more can only be an advantage.
The works by Reinhard Lakomy and Monika Ehrhardt,
"The Magic Tree of Dreams"( Der Traumzauberbaum), or "Story songs: the raindrop Paule Platsch"
(Geschichtenlieder: der Regentropfen Paule Platsch) wonderful stories and songs are written very simply and understandably and are very well done and suitable for children as well as adults, highly recommended.
Hihi, what a sweet little man, he is so adorable, like his parents.
I'm sure you'll have many more experiences like the one at 22:00 during the first 3-4 years of child hood :-D (At least we had, and I don't think that neither us nor our kids are out of the ordinary in any way)
As to your question at 22:33 - maybe the same way I learned/improved my english:
(1) Started listening to english radio stations (BFBS first, later AFN as we moved down south) at a young age (they just had the better music on rotation :-)
(2) Watched movies or shows in english with german (or other) subtitles
(3) Read books in english if possible.
As a result of (2) I also picked up a good amount of swedish on the way. My dad was living in Sweden for >30y and especially when I was younger I was with him touring Sweden during the summer holidays. Since I liked to watch movies un-dubbed and the scandinavian countries regularlys do *not* dub and just slam subtitles on, I indirectly learned swedish since I could follow the english audio and matched that against the swedish subtitles. Add to that the fact almost every Scandinavian knows at least basic english, so that helps too. That and being from the northern part of germany :-)
Great video explaining the different methods of foreign language learning and immersion. I am a German living in the USA, and we used the one parent, one language method to raise my daughter bilingually. I found that reading children’s books to her solely in German, exposing her to German children’s songs and nursery rhymes and German children’s shows/movies was extremely helpful. Also, communicating with German family members and friends in Germany by Skype/FaceTime helped enforce her German language skills. You will be pleasantly surprised how quickly Jack will be able to switch between German and English as his language skills develop. I have also found that bilingual children have an easier time picking up an additional language in school. At the time my daughter went to preschool, her German language skills were stronger than her English skills. However, that quickly changed because of the constant exposure to the English language all around her, and now her English skills are much better than her German skills, but she has a strong foundation in the German language and can carry on conversations with German family members. I would consider her mostly fluent in German. My daughter and I continue to speak German to each other, although I have to admit that some English words get mixed in by her when she cannot think of a German word. Much success to you guys in your endeavor to raise Jack bilingually.
I also wanted to mention that learning both languages and cultures helped my daughter embrace her two different heritages and backgrounds and she feels comfortable and at home in both countries.
Wow thank you so much for sharing your experience! This is exactly what we hope to do with Jack (although, admittedly in reverse with English at home and German at school). I am so happy that your daughter has successfully embraced both languages. Kids are just amazing little sponges.
Grew up monolingual as is rather common after all;
I guess your motivation has to be profound to pierce that language and cultural barrier especially if you weren't born with it.
Mine, it is! I just crave what I didn't have throughout my development years and beyond.
I started implementing English the better part of almost 13 years ago on my own but then it has been 6 years since I greatly increased my scrutiny adding books, newspapers to my already established routine of daily hearing hours of spoken English itself.
I will say, I came to British English later as I started my journey overseas with American English, the NBA being my very first point of contact with the matter of picking up the language.
The idea of tackling German came later as events aligned with one another towards that specific region of the world.
I'm quite new to it, it has been 4 years now that I've tried to confront it and I intend to keep on poking into it, consistency being the key to whatever result you might hope to achieve one day.
So I guess I will stick around this channel some more if you don't mind 😄😊
On the whole if Jack loves the people speaking the language, that he will come to absorb and relish for the rest of his life 🌝
Un saluto dall'Italia, bella e saporita 🇮🇹🌞
My daughter ( german) and her husband ( english) speak only in their languages to the children. But both parents speak only english with each other. My daughter speaks it fluently. Living in Germany they found a bilingual Kita. One Erzieher was german the other from an english speaking country. The 6 years old son now speaks fluently in both languages, the 2,5 years old one understands both. It helps that they meet the english family 4-5 times a year. Now the older one stayed for one week with his english grandma and all were fascinated how good his english is. Now going to school in his first year he will learn english there. And he will learn reading and writing english in Grundschule.
I am sure you are on a better path raising your son bilingual than I was when my children grew up in Denmark. I am their German father. But I didn't speak much German with them. So they didn't learn it as well as I would have hoped.
I love this topic, as someone who studied English literature and linguistics, as a mother of a 5-year-old trying to become bilingual and as someone who has learned 9 languages so far (though most far far from fluent).
Your approach with Jack sounds perfect to me in your situation. Also for another reason you haven't mentioned. You talked about grammar mistakes you might make. But it is also better in terms of accent if he learns from native speakers.
You talked about it being important to learn the language in multiple ways. I actually wrote a seminar paper on developing language skills and something that was stressed again and again is that true bilingualism needs the child to develop both languages equally, meaning he either has to also learn to read and write English when he learns this in school for German. Next to teaching it yourself or through language courses another option are international schools where subjects are taught in multiple languages.
My son's situation is a bit complicated. My mother tongue is Swiss German and I'm a single mum. His daddy speaks English but lives in London, so other than zoom calls he can't really help. Because my son was very late with learning to talk and had difficulties, I focussed on Swiss German first. But I will eventually have to teach him English as well. He already has quite some vocabulary and loves his TipToi books as well as audio books, and music. But the plan to really get him to talk is to swap to English as main language at home. Certainly not ideal but in my situation the only feasible option. Something I found really good as a source to read stories to him are books intended for children who start to read English. They use very simple language with lots of repetition which makes it a lot easier to understand. We love the ladybird edition for example. Now to tell him stories and later he can start to read them himself.
Ah wonderful thank you so much for the recommendations and the advice! We also found while researching for this video that we are going to have to put in some good work teaching him how to read and write in English while he is also learning the same skills in German. Interestingly, there is a French-German school in Freiburg but the only English school is a private boarding school that is quite some distance away.
@@TypeAshton sometimes embassies have resources or addresses that can be helpful. In Switzerland it's the same. Most multilingual schools are private and cost a fortune. Public schools do offer early English and French but the quality is mediocre at best. In the lower grades it's mostly singing songs and such and the subject is taught by their regular teacher so the quality of pronunciation varies wildly.
In Switzerland it is self-evident that parents living near the border of the language will educate the children in both languages. I have observed this one in a ship near Murten/Morat: These children are able to change from German to French and in reverse order from one sentence to the next.
Most people in the Netherlands are bilingual and a good portion is trilingual, especially those who live in the east. We grew up with both English and German language through school and TV. Mixed language parents have even more possibilities to raise multilingual children. It gives kids a headstart in life in general.
That's really cool. We are really excited to see what the future holds for him.
That was all extremely interesting for me, especially since i never had to think about that. I guess your approach makes sense from what you presented but i also saw the "problem" of your last point. I guess it might be a option to switch to a different strategy once Jack gets exposed to English via different sources than both of you. So it might make sense to switch to different strategy which exposes both of you more to German once has a solid German foundation and starts English in school.
And yes, it would be a total waste not to raise Jack bilingual especially since what you said about the sponge is completely true. It is much easier to learn multiple language at a young age.
I think your method is the best in your case. I think the parents should talk to the children in a language they really master. I'm German, my wife is French, so we chose the one parent one language approach, with the extension I usually spoke French with my wife. Additionally to that they went to french pre k group one afternoon a week.
Result: They are all fluent in speaking, but not perfect in writing, they learned reading and writing french at school.
My parents are from Poland and I was even born there, but we left Poland when I was around 3 and I grew up in Germany. My Mom only spoke only Polish with us and we still do, but I went to a German school and had mostly German friends, of course.
Now I am 36 and German is my first language. I am quite fluent in Polish but it is not the same as my German. In fact… I feel that my english is better than my Polish, because I am more exposed to that language now.
In my opinion you should speak the language you are best at with your child. Other languages come with exposure around them. If you are not fluent in a language, you could end up teaching your kids a faulty way of speaking.
And speaking of „teaching“, you do not teach young children in a school like setting. Just talk to them and interact. Play, do things. They learn along the way
Hello Ashton, great movie. But be prepared that Jack will lear 3 "languages". Besides English and high-german in school he will also adopt the local Slang that ist spoken in the Freiburg Region. To pick up Jacks first sentence WAS IST DAS? In the local Dialekt it would more sound like WAS ISCH DES? so his pronounciation will also include this Dialekt, because all his Friends will speak that way and AS you said belonging and being accepted in a group specific language knowledge is important. But believe mehr he will handle that with ease. AS In die moving from Baden to Württemberg. Nobody understood what In said, so I had to reskill my Badische Dialekt to swabian in order to be accepted and make friends. Took me about 6 monthly to Master that. Today this would take mehr forever. Jack will handle that with ease. Wish you guys all the best.
Dear Forest Family,
Being at least bilingual not only helps you and children but I find that being bilingual or my case trilingual is helping immensely with my senior family member,who has dementia. You see at his home, with the exception of my senior family member,it's only one language (English). It's the only language they know. He wasn't speaking that much. His wife was afraid that he might be deteriorating verbally but I when my mother and I started speaking with him in English and would switch to another language in the middle of a sentence, he not only perked up but was happily conversing in dual languages
In linguistics there was a field called second language acquisition where it is discussed that children acquire the language through being exposed to it. So in 20:00 following you are right the young ones will pick it up easily. Just provide structure to everyday life so it is clear when is what. In teaching the older children people actually tended to teach those older one's similarly. Since the brain seems to be able with the little ones to pick up the new language why not using the same approach in classic lessons so expose to language but not talk about rules that much. You do not explain he she it -s rules to Jack. He just gets it.
I was born in Switzerland to German parents, who could not speak Swiss German (which you might think is similar to German, but really is not as every German will tell you that has been to/moved to Switzerland thinking it was just like moving to a different Bundesland). Hence, proper German was th only language spoken at home, but I picked up Swiss German on the street and while playing with friends (it was a time before the wonderful day care facilities of today existed). When I was 5 years old my father had the opportunity to work in Michigan (USA) for two years and our whole family moved. We still spoke exclusively German at home, as my mother did not speak English very well at all, but me and my bothers all picked up English organically on the street, in kindergarden, and school. Our parents did support our English language developing by sending us to some additional tutoring (especailly me), so that I could keep up more easily in school. After two years living in the US we moved back to Switzerland and I started primary school. Some schooling challenges did start occurring for me at this point. As I had completed Year 1 and half of 2 in the US, I was well ahead of my Swiss class mates in maths, but as you know speaking out numbers in English in German (especially those 21 and above) is very different. Hence, I struggled quite a bit in my first couple of years in Swiss schools due making what seemed like errors in my spoken (but not written) maths in class and the challenges of having to learn writting German (Swiss German is only spoken, not a written language). I completed all my schooling and went to university in Switzerland and the English I picked-up as a 5-7 year old coupled with the English I took throughout secondary school in Switzerland has served me very well during my studies. In fact, it made me confident enough to apply to US PhD programmes, recieving 3 offers. Fast forward, I graduated with a US PhD, worked 2 years as a Postdoc at a US Ivy-League university, and now live and work in the Northeast of England with my wife and two kids. As her parents and relatives do not speak English at all, it was imperative that our kids learn to speak Swiss-German and after some research we settled on the same method as you guys. My kids are not 7 and 5 and are completely fluent in both languages and are doing very well in primary school, including their ability to speak the regional Gordie accent (...just google it...). The key to makng that method work, I think is having some regular daycare arrangements. Both our kids went to nursury for at least 3 days a week during school time, which is where they learned most/all of their English. We still only speak Swiss German in the House and it is completely natural for them (in fact, they switch seemlessly between Swiss-German and Engish when friends of theirs are over to play, just like I switch from Swiss-German to German when speaking to my parents or brothers in the presence of our wives/girl friends). In fact, because we also exclusively read bedtime stories in German, my 7 year old has started to pick-up how to read in German and is now reading German at the appropriate level he would if he were going to primary school in Switzerland. Given my experience, both as a child and parent, I think I can vouch for the method you guys have chosen and personally recommend it to colleagues asking me about it. It is of course significantly easier if both parents speak the same but different language from the country they live in. Friends that are themselves bilingual couples in a foreign context have it much harder and find it much more challenging for their child to pickup the different languages.
Very interesting story! Thanks for sharing your language journeys. We totally feel you on the number learning from 21 on, it's one of the early struggles for people starting the language.
My German immigrant mother raised me with both German and English, which means I had British English in my nursery school in Chicago. The one she did not want to send me to, but I insisted on because the other children on our block were in school. Of course my English thrived there. I went to Germany each summer and that is where my German developed. Later on I had it in school with monolingual children. When my German immigrant husband and I had our daughter, we created a Heritage language after school program at her school which she was in as long as she was at that school. In school she took Mandarin and Spanish. In a different school for high school, she has taken German as a foreign language with classmates because that was our best alternative until this year, her senior year, where she is taking an extra Saturday German school class to develop her vocabulary and learn more complex grammar forms. They offered her the C1 test for German university, where she plans to go next year. This class is through the DANK Haus Kinderschule in Chicago.
Most of my daughter's classmates are no longer taking any language in their senior year. They only needed two years, and those who did not continue take electives. Mostly those who went on exchange to a German speaking country in their junior year are still taking German. My daughter had her Austrian exchange partner come and stay with us from Wien in the fall of 11th grade, and then she went in January and spent most of the rest of the school year there. She also went back in the summer in time for the end of their school year celebrations and ball, and then to hang out. So, German comes easily to her, and her German is close to native like. She also knows a lot of Austrian words and expressions.
We live in a University neighborhood and most of our good friends are from other countries, and are multilingual, so that is the milieu in which our daughter is growing up. One family is Finnish and Egyptian/German and the daughters speak Finnish, German and English, and are taking French in school . The older one has been learning Arabic in a course, which is the language she is least fluent in. Other friends are Austrian and Turkish and their children speak English, German and Turkish and are taking French in school. Another couple are Polish and German, so their children speak both languages, and are taking Spanish in school. Another family speaks Hebrew and the children are bilingual in Hebrew and English and take German in school, which their parents speak fluently.
Most of the parents I have mentioned speak multiple languages like my husband, who has German, English and then to a lessor degree Greek, Latin, Italian, French and Russian. Right now he is learning Ukrainian on Duolingo, and my daughter is trying to teach herself French. She will be using it this summer in a class trip as well as the Spanish on trips to Costa Rica and Spain. We feel that people should know many languages because it helps us be global citizens. Also, being in a mommy group when my daughter was young with parents from several countries lent itself to my learning about other parenting methods.
That is, another piece of linguistic plurality is learning culture and customs going along with languages. I have enjoyed looking a the series Generation Helikopter Eltern to look at how our parenting values fit with the German ideas of parenting being expressed in the show. www.zdf.de/dokumentation/generation-helikopter-eltern I am enjoying your series as well because being from Illinois, and having our families in Niedersachsen as well as a home in Northern Germany, I can relate to your German-Midwest USA connections.
From my perspective, if I were in your position I would like you now choose #2 English as home language, but it obv. cannot stay like this forever. This has to be carried on until you and Jonathan are really "naturally fluent" in German - until then frankly, there is basically no other approach possible - from around Vorschule one should (at home) switch daily #4 and execute that meticulously. For ex. starting a sentence at 23:59 => in German ending it at 0:01 in English with a blink of an eye, that does mean it does not matter if one is drunk, sleepy, trying to settle conflicts etc. Very hard to achieve, once it is up and running it works.
It helps to learn and understand colloquial words and daily used words in a home setting, something like "Gibst Du mir den Sparschäler!" etc. The advantage is that everyone learns from each other, it has to be achieved that the switch is natural, not kind of artificial, but one needs a certain level of language skills to succeed. As soon as everyone is speaking those languages perfectly one can switch to #3 - I do think in contrast what was said in the vid, in order to make #3 work everyone has to be able to express oneself effortlessly in the non-native language, think about conflict discussions etc. Thanks for summoning up those solutions, from my point of view I think it is not an either-or it is more a decision of which method is superior at which time/situation in life.
I have lived during my 20's in a flat in the UK with 5 nationalities :) - We used approach #3 at home for French, German, Spanish, and English and #4 for Italian. It was BABYLON! The most irritating thing was that we had exchange semesters abroad in Spain, Germany, and France, therefore we always planned to stay together in one apartment. In Spain that did not work out we had a Japanese girl with us in the flat - it was fun. When we have returned from a club night it was 5 languages in one sentence, the basic structure was always English, all in all, it was quite mad, and it obv. was dependent on the language skills of those persons we have brought home with us. Mayhem!
P.S.: ❤️ the cute ending!
yes I think as Jack gets older we will probably end up switching methods once his English is well established. ❤️❤️❤️ All in all, we are thrilled that Jack will have such a varied exposure to languages growing up here.
your child will learn german no problem even if you only speak english at home i am from australia came to the netherlands when i was 4 we would speak english at home till i was 8 and watched mostly english tv i had no problem learning dutch it did help my dad is dutch and raised here in the netherlands
From what I recall of my (few) psychology lectures, bilingualism actually delays the onset of dementia + gives a theory of mind advantage! So he is very lucky to be able to grow up bilingual :)
That is so awesome! Another viewer also comment that they had read that it also reduces your risk of Alzheimers. The brain is an amazing thing!
And it also helps if you should suffer a stroke. Usually one language remains intact.
I see lots of comments for people saying talk your native language and not your nonnative language as “you dont want to teach him mistakes” Im a bit biased as Im part of a whole community of parents raising their kids on their non native language. Im raising my kid in both spanish and italian. My italian is basic at most but we read so much to make up for my lack of knowledge. We also watch alot of italian shows to hear and repeat the spoken language. Anyways people can do it but it takes alot of work 💪and outside resources. So far we are a yr and a half and I see wonderful results so far but as adam beck says its a marathon not a sprint.
Best of luck!!
Is a gift that you give your children when you speak another language. We speak, High German! Spanish, English and Swiss, because we live in Switzerland. The children started talking later, but they have a larger vocabulary
You've made a solid choice regarding language and your kid(s). He'll grow up perfectly bilingual. My only additional advice: as time goes by, the kids will ask you what different words mean. When that happens, never just tell them the German equivalent -- define the word in English and give them examples in English.
Yes great point!
Both my husband and I were raised bilingual using the heritage language method. We have picked 2 other languages along the way and our daughter is being raised trilingual. We are using a version of heritage language because we do used to using our first 2 languages interchangeable and German is reserved for Kita. She will say one word in all 3 languages.
That is so amazing!
7:20 former neighbours have brought up their children with 4 (!) languages.
She is Asian, he is French living in Germany and the majority of relatives understand English.....
When the children were young they kind of mixed languages together, but actually who is not?
Now as grown ups, they easily switch between languages. Moreover it is hard to tell if they are native speakers or not, as they have learned the necessary mouth movements from an early age. When learning a language later in life it takes years of training to get the necessary interaction of muscles of the jaw, the mouth, tongue etc at the right point together to utter each sound correctly.
That is AMAZING! It sounds like our good friends who are raising their daughter (she is 3.5) to speak Lithuanian, Dutch, German and English! Just amazing.
Hi, you are on a very good track, no worries. And gosh, he is so cute!
One word of advice from the experience of friends of mine (bilingual kiddos, German/ French, in northern Germany, in the 80ies before easy access to French literature, movies, radio etc. online):
All three boys are perfect native speakers in German and French. However, in writing and everything that reaches an academic level, they are hesitant (and even think I have an advantage over them after having lived, studied and worked in Belgium and France for two years each, I am C2 level and teach it but am nowhere near accent free, on the phone folks think I am Belgian or Senegalese :-)) - which puzzled me a little bit. It's just the reduced practice in writing and reading that limits their self confidence at the highest level. And all kids are very bright and accomplished in a very nurturing household.
The cure? Well, you are a researcher, you'll figure it out :-). (but for starters, lots of reading in English as well will help Jack to mitigate that last level threshold of perfect command of his parents' native language).
It's a challenge for much later, but if he has passion for literature in both languages, you can probably circumvent that minor trap.
Thanks for the great advice!
Our now 15-year-old son grew up in the UK until he was twelve. At that point we decided to move to Germany because of Brexit.
My husband and I are both German so in the UK we decided to speak only German at home and English everywhere else, unless we were with people who spoke German too, or English at home with visitors, so I guess we did the people based version you described. We regularly visited German relatives too, for several weeks every year.
When my son was about to join nursery I noticed that he pretty much understood everything in English that suited his age and to make his transition into a purely English speaking environment easier, I started speaking in English with him at home during play sessions. This worked well and he felt at home in the nursery right away at 2 years and 9 months.
After that it was again mostly German at home but it didn’t help that we as his parents are more or less bilingual too (after many years outside of Germany at that point) and it was way too easy to slip into English just repeating something someone said or talking about what happened during the day. We were on a slippery slope. 😅 When our son started school at the age of four this got more and more as he learned new vocabulary there that he didn’t know in German. So I got into a habit of talking to him mostly in German and then instantly translate his English replies back to him so that he would at least have a passive knowledge of those expressions.
Nevertheless by the age of 12 his German was nowhere as strong as his English which we really noticed every time we went to visit Germany: he was shy about answering questions as his language reaction was in English and he wasn’t able to be as quick witted in German.
In the UK I never took the time to teach him how to read or write in German. I would have liked to send him to some Saturday school thing for that but it was too far away and would have eaten up the whole day. When it became clear that we would move to Germany with him, some months beforehand I started to teach him a little about reading German with the help of some books for primary school children. He picked up quickly how easy German spelling and pronunciation can be.
We registered him with a German Gymnasium and were hoping for the best. 😅Amazingly three years later his German is almost as good as his English, even without much intervention. At the beginning he spelt almost all German words with English sounds - a nightmare for the teachers but they were lenient, he’s not the only child ever in Germany with another language being stronger. Initially it was a struggle, I had to translate some of his homework for him, especially history. They put him into a DAZ course at school (German for foreigners) but that wasn’t what he needed as he still had German grammar naturally in his head. So after six months they let him simply get on with things. I could already tell after three months that he had got more used to everything when he came home after school saying, that school was boring. He had internalised the new lingo and procedures and everything became more normal. He still struggles with some German expressions these days but he’s on a good way and doing well at school.
We still speak a mixture of both languages at home and our son uses spoken English at lot while gaming with friends from various countries. My husband uses English while speaking with colleagues and his company’s customers. But I can feel that I get a bit rusty when speaking, I don’t have enough exposure.
So, looking at our experience I would recommend to you to be a bit more active about your son’s English when he gets old enough to read and write and spends more time outside your English speaking home bubble. English lessons in school will bore him to death by the way 😆 but if you keep the ball rolling he should at least get a good grade in that subject easily.
What I forgot to say is that many moons ago I studied linguistics so I found this whole language development thing naturally extremely interesting to watch. At no point ever in the UK was our son slowed down by growing up with two languages, only when we moved to Germany it took him a while to catch up. Funnily enough he‘s not keen at all at learning another language, French in his case, but he is actually quite good at getting the grammar.
Wow this is really an interesting story, thank you for sharing it. It's incredible how quickly kids can pick up foreign languages. Especially looking in on it as adults who constantly struggle to learn and understand the grammar. 😂
As for him learning English in school... you're absolutely right. Maybe we can enroll him in French classes instead. In his spare time, he can help his friends with his English fluency.
@@TypeAshton our experience is that German schools are not really good at allowing your child do a different course instead. I don’t think there are primary schools that do French anyway but it could be different at a secondary school where they usually have French language teachers. My son wasn’t doing very well in French in his Gymnasium at first as French in the UK is taught in a slower speed, so they gave him some tasks to do while being in his English class. A good English teacher should use your son as an excellent free language resource! 😅
I told my son before joining the Gymnasium never ever to correct the English teacher in front of the class, it undermines their authority. Their English is not always perfect but you just need to let it go - unless they wrongly correct your written tests. Some of his class mates commented that his English sounded weird as they were not used to a British accent. It will be easier for your son in that respect as most people here are more familiar with American English. Funny thing is they learn British spellings (e.g. favour) but often try to speak the American way. 🤷🏼♀️
Hi. I want to tell you that I love your scientific approach to each topic.
Since I have studied brain development for programming neural networks I will give my opinion and knowledge. For learning at any age, it is important to have fun learning, because the amygdala will block learning otherwise or make it really hard, short explanation.
I think your approach is very suitable for now.
On the other hand, don't worry be happy is a very good approach too 🙂.
I would recommend that you speak more German at home when Jack is speaking German fluently. And adding another language as soon as possible, when the education system offers it for free and the other kids can do it too, would help to get Jack x-multilingual 🙂. He will outrace you at learning German anyhow.
As humans we are lazy and I missed the opportunity to learn French in Realschule because I had been lazy and did not want to go to school longer than the bare minimum. But I regretted it only a year later, when we had an exchange with our french partner city.
Now another scientific aspect, which you may be able to get your friends wondering.
German kids learn German by laying in the stroller and adults saying: " dutsy dutsy du". And with all this they learn to say Mama and Papa and more, before they go to Kita and hear a lot more real German. And a couple of years ago, there has been no Kita and the kids learned German, like myself, though I have no clue about grammar, but I get it right.
Imagine how impressive the brain capacity of a toddler must be, to fulfill this task. An adult would never stay the chance to make this happen.
I could be that it takes longer that he starts actually speaking, but when he finally does, then most probably bilingual. The plasticity of the brain has then be programmed to learn more languages easily.
And kids learn much more easy anyhow.
But this process makes the difference between bilingual und monolingual. You could do this with music and art too, but don't forget, learning has to be fun. And actually the bilingual process of forming the brain to learn languages more easily will help him to learn other things, like music or art more easily too.
So you I think and hope you can relax and enjoy and take it more the Australian way: "no wucking forries mate" 🙂.
Greetings from Freiburg
Well her scientific take doesn't surprise me in the least. For me its a direct result of the type of education she received along the way to her PhD. That type of education trains one's mind in a *very* specific way and drastically changes one's thought process along the way. At least that's what I've observed / experienced.
And yes "fun" or better put "absence of forcing to learn" is one of the key elements.
Males are known to (generally) start speaking later than females. But also many tend to go from "no talk at all" to "firehose mode" at an instant...
Our 1stborn (8f) was *very* vocal by reaching the 1.5y mark. The progression from single words to 3 word "sentences" and then to thoughts/arguments spanning multiple sentences was... aehm... "fast" (and tedious/exhausting but in a good way:-)
A friend of mine is from Finland and married to a Russian. Both talk in English and live in Germany. Their kids speak all 4 languages fluently, and mix them sometimes to funny sentences when then talk to each other. Mainly when they feel a certain word e.g. in English, might describe something better. It's stunning to see them switching the languages when they discuss with the parents. About 20 years ago I saw a similar family at Tokyo Airport (he was German and she Japanese). The kids were about 4 or 5 years in age. Everyone at the launge was stunned watching and listening them.
If it works with 4 resp. 3 languages, it works for sure with 2.
That's really quite amazing! Children's brains are just sponges when it comes to learning languages, it's really incredible.
My tip would be that start watching, well everything, in german with english subtitles (or the other way around). Thats how i (mostly) learned english. it helps with understanding and teaches the written form of the language as well.
You are doing the right thing already. You always want to speak the language that comes natural to you, you want to be able to use a nursery rhyme or song or saying or all the Mom things we tend to do...and all these things would not be available to you in German, and Jack will outgrow nursery rhymes quicker than you can culturally integrate into the German culture to such an extent.
What you are doing will work fine for him, it is a great choice and is the best choice in your language situation.
There will come a point in time, maybe not on your next trip to the US, but some later one, where all of a sudden he will notice that 'nobody speaks German around here' or he will come to the point in time, where he recognizes that his friends do not speak English like he does, and it will actually confuse him, and there will be many other milestones like that. Enjoy them, it is fun to see them grow up bilingual and confident in both cultures.
Also, do not worry about a few words that get mixed up at times, especially in the first 2-3 years. That is completely normal, the brain sorts such stuff out, as time goes on. It is no different than a child in the US, when you ask him or her whether they drank their milk, and they respond: 'I drinked it already'. A half year later that problem is gone, independent of whether you chose to correct the child or not. It just works itself out.
If you later on choose to move back to the States, keeping up his German will be the bigger challenge. Especially, as he needs to learn the age appropriate new vocabulary, and needs to learn how to read and write. In the end, we adults do not talk like 5 year olds, and if his German would happen to freeze at that level, this is all he would have. His pronunciation would always be completely natural, but he would regress in knowledge, and he would never develop all the new skills that 6-18 year olds happen to learn. And yes, that does include reading and writing, as you say. And I mean not only basic letters, but also writing an essay at age 14 that is at the level of his peers. Keeping his German up in the US is much harder than doing the same in Germany, as culture tends to work against your interests. But with a lot of determination and the right kind of German classes you can manage that too.
All the best, you are off to a great start.
I would appreciate if you would use words father and mother instead of parent A and parent B. Everything else was very nice and informative
Love this family 🥺😍
Awe thank you so much. ❤️❤️❤️
what i ofund interesting in the first years is how forming the pronunciationworks if you got time note down how your son develops with certain words: so that nanne became nonne and eventually German nochmal in our case. It is so fun to watch.
or also "m ma" for Mama in the beginning 'b pa' for Papa