Industrial logging | Farming Simulator 22 survival
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- Опубліковано 10 вер 2024
- A recap.
I had a chainsaw and a bike. I used the bike once in the intro, and while it gets mentioned occasionally it's never been used after the first minute of this series. Perhaps the bike was superfluous to the adventure. I felt otherwise.
I used the chainsaw to chop some trees. I sold those trees by hauling logs by hand to the wood people. I used that money to buy an ATV. This allowed me to haul the logs more quickly. Life was good.
I sold the ATV and bought a grabby lift truck thing thinking it would speed the process up. It didn't.
I sold the grabby lift truck thing, losing money hand over fist in the process, and bought a tractor, grabby arm, Senor Fatty and a trailer. I couldn't get the trailer to work so I sold it, then bought it again when I realised it was the right trailer. I also sold the tractor and bought a slightly bigger one. Later on I sold that tractor and bought a slightly bigger one but I didn't show you that on video because it wasn't very exciting.
I then did some mowing, because the endless logging was making me wonder where I'd gone wrong with my life.
Then I bought a sawmill, because that would stop the wood people ripping me off all the time... and that brings us up to now. Okay? You clear? No need to watch the rest of the series but you probably should anyway.
*****
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After seeing Colonel failure and the success with the EGV65 AHK SG it's enough to make you want one in your garden...I mean why not, I can't imagine any of my neighbors have one.
Think of the practical applications! Bins need putting out? No, problem. Cat stuck in a tree? Come on down! Dropped your wedding ring down a drain? EZ PZ.
I was looking for a mothers day gift, but thanks to Colonel Failure, my search has ended! My mum will absolutely love her EGV 65 AHK SG, it is the thing that has really been missing as the centerpiece of her living room.
Just 140 easy payments of 69.99!
@@colonelfailure You could even round the kids up with it
@@colonelfailure Eee Zed, Pee Zed? Or are you coming around to the correct way to pronounce Z? 😁
Mother's Day gifting! Thank you! I was at a loss this year. But, of course.
It's the gift that says "Here, Mom! I bought you something."
Congratulations on your new role as Tajfun Brand Ambassador! The Hoiking Kits are sure to truly fly off the shelves. And not just because some buffoon has driven his tractor into aforementioned shelves...
Love the electronic music tracks. When I try to look them up with Shazam it tells me a different artist for the same track every time - you broke it!
Tree farming is still farming.
Also tractors are kinda amazing. Just casually driving up a relatively steep hill dragging an entire tree trunk, or two, along like it's nothing.
Great so funny and blahza the how not to move wood pallets around, however a lot more quicker and fairly efficient way of doing it, oh how we love the strange "realistic physics" of farming simulator games lol
That advert tune really kicks it into high gear when the sleighbells start. I'm getting my Special Groovy today!
The sleighbells almost guarantee some seat jiggling, I felt.
Getting major IT crowd vibes from your ad for the Awesome Hoiking Kit Special Groovy. Just perfect.
Another great video. It has brought me back to this channel. I started watching with Transport Fever in 2016!
Terribly exciting business
Hilarious😂 well done, very entertaining
Good choice of adding the Furniture Factory - Chairs have the highest $ ratio (Wood > Chair > Sell $$$) of any wood based production.
There's also a pallet factory which could make for some we are now making our own pallets story fakery. Thinking of doing a wood based series myself if I ever get round to it with the saga of Woody Turner and everything you can do with wood from Maple syrup making to Christmas tree cutting and cashing in to forest floor farming but me getting round to stuff is like a tree growing- s.l.o.w. plus there are so many other equally valuable things to do with ones time :)
'Loggering' - that's a new one. Just as well the Colonel is capturing logs rather than bugs...
So basically you got a little bulldozer now, I approve :)
This guy is the Jeremy Clarkson of Farming Simulator!
5 Stars! The Tajfun made all my daily tasks easy! The simple payment plan means you can have a high quality professional tool for only a few dollars a month!
In reality, the "interesting" (and not in a good way) aspect of dragging out timber with something like the EGV 65 AHK SG is that the trees have an uncanny knack of getting themselves stuck on the stumps which are left behind. Once that happens, the tractor is likely to set off across the landscape in an unfortunate direction or the cable will break and become an impromptu whip. I can't help but feel that the developers have missed a trick there.
That would be rather exciting. Instead there is a slight bungee quality to the winch cable whereby you p'twoingg back after getting snagged.
Mum really likes her Tajfun Extra Great Value 65 AHK SG. Gave it to her this Mothers day.
The thrills, the high drama, the laughs, the wanting for more. That's why!
good episode, time went by really quick so looking forward to next one!
You're just so much better when talking about vehicles with wheels.
Colonel Failure; Work smart not hard! Who needs anything else than the EGV65 AHK SG, the only tool you'll ever need!
Love this series!
Best. Commercial. Ever. OMG, the moo. LOL
The only reason preventing me from going to the woods and start chopping down some trees and hauling them to the nearest saw mill after seeing your Tajfun advertisement is because its raining at the moment. And it might actually be illegal. Not sure what the current punishment for log thievery is here in Germany. Might have to walk the plank for that.
And i don't have access to a tractor. And i don't know if there is a saw mill nearby.
Btw. Tajfun should consider hiring you for some advertisements. Or at least be a sponsor of your channel.
Colonel, why don't we fully breathe in further the magic and labor involed and slow down the footage to really appriciate each step of the way
Also colonel , its buschels, wich is a wierd farming unit
Definitely “cubic velocity”
It's scientific.
Keep doing your thing 😂
Awesome :D
You say the Tajfun comes without batteries, but does it include the tractor?
and here I am watching this again
Sound decision.
What did you call us? Log Wobblers?!
I see you.
@@colonelfailure I am seen
Hoikingkit should be a brand of equipment by now.
Know what could probably be better than the TAJFUN EGV 65 AHK SG at plowing pallets around? A snowplow maybe?
Does it have a winch? No. It does not. It is, therefore, inferior.
Almost surprised you didnt park the rig in the selling zone and then winch like 42 of those pallets in all at once
If only one could winch pallets. Sadly, one cannot despite what the advertising may imply.
@@colonelfailure This is pure blasphemy.....what is this world we are living in.....
@@colonelfailure the important part is that you did indeed try. I've recently purchased FS22 & you've inspired me to begin my own foray into tree and log! 200+ hours of mowing and bale wrapping in FS19 I feel I've reached the end of that particular caper
Farm and logging kit manufacturers need you for their marketing with your brilliant sales pitching skills. I'm buying seven even though I don't need one. You did miss one pitch though- dealing with household clutter? Just shove it into another room. Ok you may have to shove it through a wall to fit the tractor in but hey. Or just bag it up and winch it out, however cluttered up your space is the Webslinger Wonder Winch 2023-5000 TM will do the job smashingly well. Buy seven and get a free Senor Fatty TM for when being weighed down leaves you a little unbalanced.
To be fair, over-shoving into the next room will, eventually, collapse the exteriot wall, thereby emptying the room again.
Who would consider buying a forky forkfork forklift when you have a tractor?
Stop spoilerising the next episode.
First to watch 😀
The Amish come to mind this episode, maybe you could do a barn raising with even more wood next episode colonel
Just chop them bloody trees down.
Not so much talk!
Just kidding 😁
@13:59 Is that like the last suit you'll ever put on from Men in Black?
logs are normally measured in tons or in board feet , im not sure what the game measures, probably just ...logs
It is most certainly the cubic velocity
Did i hear you say it HOIKs??
SOLD!!!
Hi Colonel. Can you or someone in the comments please let me know where I can get that winch mod you were using? I really could use it, just can't seemed to find it. Thx. Great series mate
Despite the snazzy name the good Colonel gave it, I think it’s one of the 2 winches added with the platinum expansion.
Yup. Platinum expansion - not a mod, DLC.
@@colonelfailure Thanks so much👍
So where do I get my own Special Groovy?
Keep your eyes peeled for the opening of the new Colonel Failure Store
There better be a t-shirt featuring this piece of equipment. 😂
Am I the only one disappointed the Massey stayed upright this entire episode?
If it doesn't fall over of its own volition there's not much I can do. I have standards to uphold whereby all traffic incidents are legitimate.
There may be a correlation between the Massey Ferguson falling over and the spreadsheet being displayed in the episode
Blackbeard?