Join my Coaches Monthly Q&A call here: bit.ly/MonthlyQAsforCoaches My treat! Each Month we will discuss a Coaching Topic that will support your growth. Get access to the past recordings as well and get your free 1 Resource Development CCE for each month! Woot! 💝 You can also access the UA-cam Recordings with and without the Markers here: bit.ly/youtube-mcc-demos
Dear Lyssa, thank you for making such resourceful videos! I want to celebrate your fierce vulnerability as a coach: next to the great moments, there were segments where your questions didn’t come out as concise/powerful as you hoped for. You turned these moments into opportunities for collective growth and learning. This is courageous leadership and mentorship. Thank you!
Thank you @giuliotamacoldi8130 I don't believe in perfect coaching; it's all opportunities for growth, mine included :) I appreciate your words greatly!
Sorcery! I LOVE the markers. It really helped to organize the techniques you used in my brain. One of my biggest take-aways is how you threaded Carole's words lightness & weight with HER definitions throughout the whole conversation. That kind of evidence of deep listening is so important for making the other person feel your engagement. I also appreciated your critique as far as where you felt you could have done better with examples of what better could look like. There is much to learn here from Lyssa as the coach AND Carole as the coachee; especially when you realize Carole is also a pro-coach.
You're so welcome! I think that is part of the learning, one question is not equal to one competency. You can meet multiple competencies depending on the way you ask a question. :) Glad they are supporting your coaching.
Hi. Watched this demo now. Learnt a lot. Wondering how we could shift the "need to"/"should" that the client keeps expressing even at the end to something they choose to do.
Thank you for the question @aditiradhakrishnan7073 it's an interesting one. It depends on a few things. First, I agree that "should'ing" on ourselves isn't useful. On the other hand, the client was moving forward. I could have asked something like, "I am hearing some "shoulds" and I wonder how those are serving you to move forward?" Or, "What is the difference between "should" do and "get to"? I haven't listened to the call in a while, so I can't remember exactly what my thinking was. But I love that you are looking at other choice points!
Thank you. Such an awesome session. I learnt a lot. The closing about 'is there any thing she would like to name?'🤗I noticed that through the session you used this method so she could come up with her own insights captured in her own words. Interesting. 👍🏽
That is part of what makes it coaching, our curiosity is informed by our expertise. So instead of sharing my expertise, I ask open questions that invite the client to name their own insights. That way their brain lights up and they "own" the knowledge. :) Thank you so much for noticing that!
Thank you for being so human, authentic, and acknowledging what is not right from your side. Made it so much relatable, that every question may not land perfectly always, and THAT's OK!
Hi Satyam, @satyamarora5927 Thank you so much for your kind words and for watching. I'm delighted you found them useful! I have a lot of free resources available on my academy page, please stop by and take a look. lyssadehart.podia.com/ Cheers and happy coaching!
I like these coaching demos but wonder if you’d be willing to load one with the breaks and one without? It is distracting, at least to me, to have the coaching stop and start.
That's a great idea Amy. I may put the ones without on my website. I am working on putting the transcripts up on the website as well, with the videos. Is that something you might like? Then all the videos would be together, one with the breaks and one without, and you would see the transcripts with notes and all that jazz. Let me know your thoughts :)
Hi @Sanjaysrivastava, I actually don't do any acting, that is sort of the person that I am and how I tend to show up with people. I am silly and maybe a bit theatrical, but this is really who I am. I don't recommend my style to anyone, as it doesn't fit with who other people are. Part of becoming a partnering coach is to show up authentically. You may not be drawn to my style, but it is in fact my style. :) I hope this helps.
@@LyssadeHart Great! I thought this is an important aspect to interact and have the conversation so that coaching remains live and interesting. But this is a great learning as to express with gestures and probably client may see the non verbal of a coach too
@@sanjaysrivastava9872 absolutely, it is a partnership, with the client leading, but not that the coach must be a wooden automaton. :) Thank you for these comments and Happy coaching!
Interesting that was your experience. I just went back to the RaeNotes and can see on the transcript that I spoke 10 minutes and the client spoke 27 minutes. I am also curious what you mean by listening? Part of listening from an ICF perspective is: Listens Actively: Focuses on what the client is and is not saying to fully understand what is being communicated in the context of the client systems and to support client self-expression. When I look at questions that I asked in this conversation, what I notice are things like: "So I'm really hearing the weight around your neck and sort of this, I'm almost seeing this person with this burden they are carrying on (yeah) their back, like a yoke." "So the lightness is really aligned with motivation, is that what you're saying?" "So if we're, if the idea then is to explore between this weightiness towards this motivated lightness, where would you like to begin the exploration?" "Did you notice the shift in you when your even realizing that?" Listening, in my estimation, is being demonstrated with questions that use the clients language and noticing what is not being said as well. I would love to hear more of your thoughts. :)
@@LyssadeHart I'm new to professional coaching but I follow your coaching as it gives a clear markers on each competencies. yet I feel, client should be given more time and silence should be practiced more. Regards Lyssa
Hi@@LyssadeHart isn't it kind of putting our words and thoughts to client's mind? Yet again I do carefully watch all your demos and learn a lot. But the same time do the critical analysis as an observer too. Also, client herself is a Professional coach and before engaging with you she must have done self-coaching whch was quite evident. as she was never interested to the technical stuff like shooting and editing of her videos or whatsoever, she, at the end remained in the same zone. she had to carry on with the business she got into but with the same heavy weight. The desire of running and self involvement was still missing at the end. My question to you for my learning. should we take up any coaching assignment when the client itself is not to keen with the problem to be discussed. It looked like she brought this topic as she agreed for the demo.
@sanjaysrivastava9872 Maybe so, I think that is part of my journey, to give more silence, if you look at more recent recordings, you may see that I am working on that :) Leaving more space is always useful.
@@sanjaysrivastava9872 I would say, no, since they were her words. I didn't add those words to the conversation, but rather demonstrated listening by hearing that the client said them. Client: I think it's um I guess it is to work out how I feel about and maybe what I can do about a project that I'm working on. I've been working on this project for two years it's sort of grown um grown bigger than I was expecting, hoping, anticipating and it's become something that that... It started as something else that I thought could be a possibility of something good and it's become, it feels like a weight around my neck and dragging me down and I sort of go between do I just throw the whole thing in and you know, forget all the time and effort I've put into it or how do I somehow go forward and make this work? Coach: So I'm really hearing the weight around your neck and sort of this, I'm almost seeing this person with this burden they are carrying on (yeah) their back, like a yoke. What would be different if we explore this fully by the end of the conversation today, maybe a movement from this, this weight towards what? This maybe could have been more concise, but the weight around the client's neck, is coming from what the client shared. That demonstrates listening. :) At least to me. You can go to my website to get the transcripts and look at all my questions, I tend to use the clients' language and metaphors throughout. I look forward to your thoughts.
Join my Coaches Monthly Q&A call here: bit.ly/MonthlyQAsforCoaches
My treat! Each Month we will discuss a Coaching Topic that will support your growth. Get access to the past recordings as well and get your free 1 Resource Development CCE for each month! Woot! 💝
You can also access the UA-cam Recordings with and without the Markers here: bit.ly/youtube-mcc-demos
Dear Lyssa, thank you for making such resourceful videos! I want to celebrate your fierce vulnerability as a coach: next to the great moments, there were segments where your questions didn’t come out as concise/powerful as you hoped for. You turned these moments into opportunities for collective growth and learning. This is courageous leadership and mentorship. Thank you!
Thank you @giuliotamacoldi8130 I don't believe in perfect coaching; it's all opportunities for growth, mine included :) I appreciate your words greatly!
Sorcery! I LOVE the markers. It really helped to organize the techniques you used in my brain. One of my biggest take-aways is how you threaded Carole's words lightness & weight with HER definitions throughout the whole conversation. That kind of evidence of deep listening is so important for making the other person feel your engagement. I also appreciated your critique as far as where you felt you could have done better with examples of what better could look like. There is much to learn here from Lyssa as the coach AND Carole as the coachee; especially when you realize Carole is also a pro-coach.
LOL, Sorcery! You made me giggle and I am super glad it was useful for your learning. 😄
Just watched this now. I like this coaching demonstration because a lot of unpacking was done here. And as usual the markers are helpful
:) Yay, I am glad it was useful!
These videos are profoundly helpful, Lyssa- thank you for the markers and transcribing those moments.
You're so welcome! I think that is part of the learning, one question is not equal to one competency. You can meet multiple competencies depending on the way you ask a question. :) Glad they are supporting your coaching.
Watching this video the second time, and taking away so much again!! Thank you!!
It's funny, we do shift our ears as we listen a few times. I am glad it is serving you :) Thank you for the comment!!
Hi. Watched this demo now. Learnt a lot. Wondering how we could shift the "need to"/"should" that the client keeps expressing even at the end to something they choose to do.
Thank you for the question @aditiradhakrishnan7073 it's an interesting one. It depends on a few things. First, I agree that "should'ing" on ourselves isn't useful. On the other hand, the client was moving forward. I could have asked something like, "I am hearing some "shoulds" and I wonder how those are serving you to move forward?" Or, "What is the difference between "should" do and "get to"? I haven't listened to the call in a while, so I can't remember exactly what my thinking was. But I love that you are looking at other choice points!
Thank you. Such an awesome session. I learnt a lot. The closing about 'is there any thing she would like to name?'🤗I noticed that through the session you used this method so she could come up with her own insights captured in her own words. Interesting. 👍🏽
That is part of what makes it coaching, our curiosity is informed by our expertise. So instead of sharing my expertise, I ask open questions that invite the client to name their own insights. That way their brain lights up and they "own" the knowledge. :) Thank you so much for noticing that!
thank you! lyssa - from
philippines
@EricsonDelCastillo thank you for watching and the note! Please reach out if I can answer any questions. Happy Coaching!
Thank you for being so human, authentic, and acknowledging what is not right from your side. Made it so much relatable, that every question may not land perfectly always, and THAT's OK!
Hi Satyam, @satyamarora5927 Thank you so much for your kind words and for watching. I'm delighted you found them useful! I have a lot of free resources available on my academy page, please stop by and take a look. lyssadehart.podia.com/ Cheers and happy coaching!
I like these coaching demos but wonder if you’d be willing to load one with the breaks and one without? It is distracting, at least to me, to have the coaching stop and start.
That's a great idea Amy. I may put the ones without on my website. I am working on putting the transcripts up on the website as well, with the videos. Is that something you might like? Then all the videos would be together, one with the breaks and one without, and you would see the transcripts with notes and all that jazz. Let me know your thoughts :)
Lisa you do lot of acting. is this necessary during Coaching. you do lot of hands and body movement
Hi @Sanjaysrivastava, I actually don't do any acting, that is sort of the person that I am and how I tend to show up with people. I am silly and maybe a bit theatrical, but this is really who I am. I don't recommend my style to anyone, as it doesn't fit with who other people are. Part of becoming a partnering coach is to show up authentically. You may not be drawn to my style, but it is in fact my style. :) I hope this helps.
@@LyssadeHart Great! I thought this is an important aspect to interact and have the conversation so that coaching remains live and interesting. But this is a great learning as to express with gestures and probably client may see the non verbal of a coach too
@@sanjaysrivastava9872 absolutely, it is a partnership, with the client leading, but not that the coach must be a wooden automaton. :) Thank you for these comments and Happy coaching!
I could see you dint allow client most of talking. instead you spoke more. listening was missing. pls teach how listening to demostrate
Interesting that was your experience. I just went back to the RaeNotes and can see on the transcript that I spoke 10 minutes and the client spoke 27 minutes. I am also curious what you mean by listening? Part of listening from an ICF perspective is: Listens Actively: Focuses on what the client is and is not saying to fully understand what is being communicated in the context of the client systems and to support client self-expression.
When I look at questions that I asked in this conversation, what I notice are things like:
"So I'm really hearing the weight around your neck and sort of this, I'm almost seeing this person with this burden they are carrying on (yeah) their back, like a yoke."
"So the lightness is really aligned with motivation, is that what you're saying?"
"So if we're, if the idea then is to explore between this weightiness towards this motivated lightness, where would you like to begin the exploration?"
"Did you notice the shift in you when your even realizing that?"
Listening, in my estimation, is being demonstrated with questions that use the clients language and noticing what is not being said as well. I would love to hear more of your thoughts. :)
@@LyssadeHart I'm new to professional coaching but I follow your coaching as it gives a clear markers on each competencies. yet I feel, client should be given more time and silence should be practiced more. Regards Lyssa
Hi@@LyssadeHart isn't it kind of putting our words and thoughts to client's mind? Yet again I do carefully watch all your demos and learn a lot. But the same time do the critical analysis as an observer too.
Also, client herself is a Professional coach and before engaging with you she must have done self-coaching whch was quite evident. as she was never interested to the technical stuff like shooting and editing of her videos or whatsoever, she, at the end remained in the same zone. she had to carry on with the business she got into but with the same heavy weight. The desire of running and self involvement was still missing at the end. My question to you for my learning. should we take up any coaching assignment when the client itself is not to keen with the problem to be discussed. It looked like she brought this topic as she agreed for the demo.
@sanjaysrivastava9872 Maybe so, I think that is part of my journey, to give more silence, if you look at more recent recordings, you may see that I am working on that :) Leaving more space is always useful.
@@sanjaysrivastava9872 I would say, no, since they were her words. I didn't add those words to the conversation, but rather demonstrated listening by hearing that the client said them.
Client: I think it's um I guess it is to work out how I feel about and maybe what I can do about a project that I'm working on. I've been working on this project for two years it's sort of grown um grown bigger than I was expecting, hoping, anticipating and it's become something that that... It started as something else that I thought could be a possibility of something good and it's become, it feels like a weight around my neck and dragging me down and I sort of go between do I just throw the whole thing in and you know, forget all the time and effort I've put into it or how do I somehow go forward and make this work?
Coach: So I'm really hearing the weight around your neck and sort of this, I'm almost seeing this person with this burden they are carrying on (yeah) their back, like a yoke. What would be different if we explore this fully by the end of the conversation today, maybe a movement from this, this weight towards what?
This maybe could have been more concise, but the weight around the client's neck, is coming from what the client shared. That demonstrates listening. :) At least to me. You can go to my website to get the transcripts and look at all my questions, I tend to use the clients' language and metaphors throughout. I look forward to your thoughts.