Progressive Christmas Carols
Вставка
- Опубліковано 19 лип 2024
- Listen to this on spotify annoy your parents open.spotify.com/track/5rIQHU...
LYRICS
0:00 God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen
We wish you happy holidays, whoever you may be
So merry Christmas, Kwanzaa, Chanukah, or heck all three
We've modernized these jingles for the massive bourgeoisie
Love, The Updated Christmas Carol Team
0:22 Progressive Santa
You better not judge, you better not hate
Better not bully or discriminate
Progressive Santa's coming to town
He's making a list of gluten free foods
He won't take a peek at J-Law's nudes
Progressive Santa's coming to town
He's 50 different races
And all for tax reform
He'll protect all your children
Well, as long as they've been born
0:59 Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer (reindeer)
Had an advantageous nose (he outlived his friends)
He passed his bright red traits on (traits on)
Darwin said that's how it goes (evolution's not a theory)
1:10 Mary Did You Know
Mary did you know that your baby boy supports the NRA
Mary did you know that your baby boy is white
1:29 Deck the Halls
Deck the halls with kujichagulia
Kwa wa wa wa wa wa wa wanza
Give zawadi, hang benderas
Kwa wa wa wa wa wa wa wanza
Throw your hands up in the air-uh
Kwa wa wa wa wa wa wa wanza
1:42 Grinch
You’re a green one, Mr. Grinch
You're lacking in finesse
That greenish epidermis determines your success
Mr. Grinch
Racist Whos constrain you to the issues they continue to suppress
You’re an outlier, Mr. Grinch
You give the Whos a fright
They say your heart is 3/5ths normal,
You're either wrong or white
Mr. Grinch
Don't walk the streets of Whoville you might fight a cop the Whos will not indict
2:26 White Christmas
I'm dreaming of a racially ambiguous holiday
2:33 Away In A Manger
Away in a manger with Jesus and crew
His schmeckle got cut cause hey Christ was a Jew
2:42 O Holy Night
O holy night, the stars are brightly shining
It is the night Jesus did something holy
Joseph watched golf, his leather chair reclining
As Mary birthed a child, I think a donkey was involved
Three wise men came, with GPS they found him
Christ lied in a barn, as his omniscient baby-daddy looked down
Jesus crawled on his knees
His mom shared it on snapchat
O bright device!
O night, when Christ celebrated Christmas - Розваги
Holy fuck I dont think any of you understood this video. John isn't making fun of Christianity, or any other religion he's making fun of how society and corporations have shaped these holidays to fit what they want it to be.
Dont insult his intelligence, this is a very self aware satire.
Progressive Santa, white Jesus, racism towards the grinch. This is making fun of society not religion.
Exactly!! :)
I'm Christian and completely agree with you...he's making fun if society, not he religion
Yes!!!
jamespooh2 I'm a christian too and I thought I was sad how accurate this was. Especially the Holy Night one. To me that one is the saddest. Peaple need to watch Peanuts Christmas because I think the meaning of Christmas has been forgotten and commercialized. Everyone participates in it but there is a lot of people who dont know what they are celebrating.
*turns november*
youtube: yes it’s time
*Immediately starts recommending Christmas things in November...
YAS UA-cam, you know me well!!
Precisely.
same
This video was uploaded in December, not November.
True
“Mary did you know that your baby boy is white” kills me
Courteney Skye even though he’s Jewish
He is technically middle eastrn.
Yep that’s the joke ענבל 42
ענבל 42 they also say he supports the NRA
Like police kill black people more than white peopel
All jokes aside his voice is angelic
YES!
Beautiful harmonies!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Hey look there is a Jon representing every octave of his range
What??? How awesome, thanks for pointing it out
Then we're missing one tho
The fact that he's able to do this so well is pretty dang impressive, honestly
So do those housey inside eachother dolls , he got that talent too ?
one day were gonna find out that he is actually 4 people, and he has been hiding it all this time.
would this actually count as hiding it?
actually, can u see the reflection in the window, the black sweater, he is the only one
The best hiding place is out in the open.
+Krithi rachel varghese now I can't help but look at the reflection the entire time and it's pretty trippy......
can't be unseen
Everyone is really out here coming back to this video every year because when you listen to actual christmas music his versions get stuck in your head.
I grew up Jewish and never had any context for most of the non-popular songs since I'd never heard them before. So now that I am in a mixed religion household and I hear some of them, this is the only lyrics I've ever known.
Yep
The fact that this is 7 years old and is more real saddens me it makes me sad how accurate this is with time
8 years. Humanity doesn’t progress.
@@TacticalAnt420 it was 7 when I wrote it but unfortunately they just evolve backwards
7 years later, and right-winger Christians *still* don't realize that the entire reason Jesus was originally celebrated, to begin with...was because he was a progressive.
@@davetom8517 he was progressive then but the term has been completely switched unfortunately where now it’s a bad thing where it used to be good
@@boomingbob1579 Nah, progressive is only a bad thing to people who are REgressive. They don't get to us that it's a bad thing. I'm proud to be progressive.
He just wanted to wear all his Christmas sweaters in one video.
Dani Davis I think that topic but I love it anyways
Y'know, coming back to this song 5 years later, it makes so much more sense now that I'm not ten...
•Phoenix flame• I just watched it and I agree strongly
•Phoenix flame• you were ten in 2014?
TRUEEEEE EVERY TIME I COME BACK TO A JON VIDEO, I REALIZE SOMETHING MORE
sameeee
@@CloutKamui around that, I'm too tired to do math right now but I turned 15 a few weeks ago.
The best part of all this is that the right can't tell if it's satire, and the left can't tell if it's serious. Isn't it nice to be able to make fun of everybody, including yourself?
Kelly Delaney it’s definitely satire my guy. It’s not difficult to tell :p
@@daisy9858 some people don't know that
Daisy well the right doesn’t consists of the brightest minds, so they might find it (more) difficult 🤷🏻♂️
Michael Bennink the left doesn’t have the brightest minds either. Both have their good qualities tho. And I can hope we can all come together to hate radicals of any party
JoeyJ Could you specify what are the good qualities of the current GOP (aka the Party of Trump)? I mean? The senate basically doesn’t pick up any legislation, except judge confirmations. It’s the graveyard where good intentions of the House (of Representatives) goes to die (without a debate or vote on the matter).
Trump really doesn’t have a agenda, except the task to determine what is best for meeeeee (Trump) this day and worry about tomorrow’s best thing for meeeeee (Trump) tomorrow. He’s a cruel, children ripping from families (dont forget about that) and put them in cages (while loosing track of their parents) narcissistic piece of shit. And the current GOP consist of spineless enablers (just take Lindsay Grahams U-turn on all matters trump as proof of this) to the toddler in chief.
So again? What are the redeeming features of the current GOP that makes you believe that they have any good qualities? God knows the Democratic Party is far from perfect, but at least they are trying to do their job.... meanwhile: the 99.99% of the GOP is absolutely horrifyingly unqualified for government!!!!
2022 going into 2023 and wow this is still so spot on
ua-cam.com/video/ZkVfSyarJlk/v-deo.html
ua-cam.com/video/YAgoxAvjqA0/v-deo.html
I'm amazed that these songs are even more relevant now than when they came out 😂
2023-2024
*Wakes up on December 1st*
"IT'S TIME."
to nut or to be blessed with jon’s christmas music?
Wakes up August
"Why not"
november 1st
* ITS TIME!!*
Remy NO!-
Hell, its feb and Im here!
HEY, EVERYONE! GUESS WHAT? WE DON'T NEED A 5 PARAGRAPH ESSAY ABOUT YOUR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS! If you like the video, great! If you don't, good for you! Please leave. Have a nice life
xD HAHAHA, right above a 5 paragraph essay about someones religious beliefs.
I liked it it was about pepole of today not Christ pepole should stop freaking out
"Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding it." /Oscar Wilde.
What I mean is...There's no point in arguing with each other just because we ''the blind people'' see different ''animals'' in ''the dark room''. What difference would it make to call others animal in your cat name, anyway? If you believe in something.. well, good for you. A long as you keep it to yourself and tolerate others.
i thaught this was exaderated then i scrolled down.... holy shit!
Well, I'm Christian myself and I thought this was hilarious. John made this video purely for comedy and not for people to start being aggresive to one another. I believe in one thing, some people believe in something else, and I respect that.
I don't see why everyone can't just calm down and enjoy the video instead of bashing on each other.
Have a merry christmas, everyone.
It’s July 2020 and the fact that this is currently so relevant disgusts me
ikr
Can’t ruin perfect 300 likes
I don't think Mary's baby boy being white is ever changing to be fair.
Even in November...
@@bethanykroemer559 make that december-
POV: Your listening to this again because it’s December.
Actually I’m watching this because my family was watching a Grinch movie and it reminded me of this. However, them watching The Grinch directly correlates with it being December so I suppose that you’re right anyway.
Is true
Seeing acronym POV in this side of the internet is.... confusing
Pov you're watching this in March cuz you're a lunatic
POV: your watching this in August because you can't wait for December
Why am I watching this its July
Me too
It's almost Halloween
Christmas is July😂
SACKCLOTHANDASHES i said the same thing
Because it's amazing and you love it. I know. I literally just got up in the middle of the night to look up this specific video. I've done that with most of Jon's videos at some point or another, because they're amazing and I love them.
He's 50 different races 🎅🏻🎅🏼🎅🏽🎅🏾🎅🏿
This made me laugh way to hard 😂
and all for tax reform
pretty little psycho Well as long as they've been born...
+Sanjana Dhabbala too far...? mmmm'ok...
+Sanjana Dhabbala XD
The fact that this was posted 8 years ago and these topics are still relevant both amazes and disturbs me.
I'm amazed that these songs are even more relevant now than when this came out 😂
“He’ll protect all your children. Well as long as they’ve been born” sent me flying to the moon every December
*I work in a Christian primary school, they started singing O Holy Night and I had to sit there trying not to think about this* 😂
I ThiNk A dOnkEy WAs InvOlvEd~
@@airbrush2433 Any help here? God...?
i actually don't know the real lyrics, soooo
@@kailye1017 same
I’m just imagining you sitting there singing under your breath “his mom shared it on Snapchat” 😂😂😂.
I'm dreaming of a racially ambiguous holiday
can this be a shirt? That would be gold
i read your comment as soon as it came out
+Hurricane Alex yes! I need this on a shirt
ok I need it to be a thing now pls god
That’s It, literally 5 years have passed… yet, all the topics are quite relevant. It just scares the shit ou of me.
Not surprising. Read some history. You’ll find that societal issues take decades to resolve at best.
6 years and it’s still relevant
when we’re young five years seems like a long time, but then unfortunately you realize these things take generations to change
I like how this is recommended to everyone every year during Christmas season.
*weather drops 0.27 degrees* IIIIIIIIIMMM DREAMING OF A RACIALLY AMBIGUOUS HOLIDAYYYYYY
Kaylee Whitman SAME THO 😂😂
Meg Griffon LMAO I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT HALLOWEEN.
Kaylee Whitman same
Thank you so much!!!! I've always has issues with that song.
9 years later and im still watching this
I STILL can’t hear white Christmas without singing “I’m… dreaming… of a.. ✨racially ambiguous holiday✨
It’s just so funny I swear
Halloween is over
TIME FOR CHRISTMAS SONGS!!!
Daniela Rodríguez Me!
Daniela Rodríguez no it's only after thanksgiving you start listening lol
Nita Nallabeli Be quite and let me listen to Christmas carols locked up in my
room in peace
Mell What does being American have to do with anything?
Mell yep that's why I don't celebrate Thanksgiving (I'm Peruvian)
“As long as they’ve been born” crying
Maya it’s so true tho
Crying like a baby that wasn't aborted
@Emerald Wolf oh.
also when your watching this in September
@Emerald Wolf I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Three of my siblings died before I was born. Again I am so sorry!!
Me in the middle of summer: "Yep, time to listen to some progressive Christmas carols. "
* proceeds to watch all Christmas videos I could find *
Same
I mean, I guess it would be appropriate for a little Christmas in July.
Me in the southern hemisphere not finding anything wrong with that. :D
This is very good, funny and disturbingly real! If Pentatonix ever need a new member they know where to go 😁
Still one of the greatest videos on youtube and I'm so happy it's officially the time of year where I can listen to this on repeat without the shame of listening to holiday music before Thanksgiving.
+lizatonix :] that's sweet of you. thanks for coming back!
+Paint thanks for being perfect!
Love your username :)
+lizatonix your name :)
+lizatonix seriously one of the best songs i've ever found on youtube
"I'm dreamingggg of aaa....racially ambiguous holiday"
Lol dead 😂😂😂
it's the fact that it's literally just the one phrase that gets me 😂😂😂
I both love and hate that this is socially t r u e
Help
to this day, this is the most beautiful rendition of O Holy Night i’ve ever heard
Dam the lyrics make so much more sense now that I'm older...
RIGHT??
@@bubblybelle555 -wing
It's gotten to the point where I don't know the lyrics to some of these actual songs but know his lyrics
Izzy G same sis
Yep lol
For after ever after I’ve completely forgotten the lyrics tot he originals they have officially left my brain
Same here
Same
Its funny that if you look in the window you see the reflection of him with the dark sweater singing by himself ahahahah
IKR!!!
JoSalvador wtf are you talking about! didn't you know his twins are all vampires.
Illuminati I knew it.
JoSalvador I noticed that as well. Mr. Grinch is the only real one.. the others are Shadow Clones... or... Vampire... clones...Meh... it's 3 am where I am, so I'm not exactly thinking clearly...
JoSalvador
Basic editing fault ;)
Should have made a "empty" backdrop + lighting shot and then make incrustation for all 4 on this one.
Instead he just used the last one as "empty" and add the 3 other layers.
to be honnest, mirror and reflecting surface are pain in the *ss when shooting/cut time comes...
who's here once again after listening to the violent christmas carols?
Me
I'm here for the first time after listening to them
Everyone who watched this when they were 11 coming back and understanding the lyrics : 👁👄👁
I’m back. It’s “racially ambiguous holiday” season!!
@Srithor Damn, you learn something new everyday
Srithor who actually cares
Srithor well I don’t understand why you have to get involved with it when it is just a username
Srithor You remind me of that scene from Monty Python’s Life of Brian
Srithor fact is I do know how to read and I am going to get far in life but you don’t have to act like an ass
"He'll protect all your children"
"Well as long as they've been born. You better watch out... Too far? Ok"
I'm still crying
G
I love that part.
I was like “Omg he went there?”
im still crying 7 years later 🤣
the fetuses sure aren't crying anymore
I'm gonna cry
8 YEARS AGO??
THROW YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR-A
You freakin genius.
True Nathan, true
I'm so glad to see you here.
Heeyyyyy, what are you doing here :O
Favorite youtuber comments positive things on other favorite youtuber's video. Life is complete.
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50th 0 [□ k90lj9mmoobtlw8♡♥□99o20 q61h 96i.98}♡
Never not impressed.
Evan
same.
I love you.
***** OMG we love you too Thank you so much for all your fantastic videos :-D
Fix your grammar and then talk
2022, and this just keeps getting more real
Right? I clicked on it, thinking it was recent, but i saw 7 years ago under the video and was shocked.
It’s scary
7 years, and this is still my favourite Christmas song.
And every year I understand a bit more of the lyrics, the gift that keeps on giving
"O bright device" was delivered so beautifully that I swear I teared up instantly. xD
If you listen to that line, volume loud(ish), headphones, eyes closed, it's like a religious experience or something.
Iris M Oh my god I just did it and you are too right
Iris M when did this happen?
Adam Duong 3:43 ish 😊👌
The whole song actually
Anyone just revisiting this for the holidays?
S.M. Gamble me
S.M. Gamble Yup.
S.M. Gamble I'm revisiting it for the millionth time in the middle of April 😂😂
S.M. Gamble welp it's may now so yup
Daniel Ackerman july now! 😂
This video is just Jon showing the entirety of his amazing range. 😂😂
almost forgot to watch it this christmas
Same hahaha
“Mary, did you know? That your baby boy..... is wHiTe.”
**le gasp**
*Jesus be laughing in Arabic*
It's Apipu
Hebrew
@@longliveplanetawesome3223 By Arab I meant people from the middle east.
Technically he isn’t white though. He’s from the Middle East so he’d be considered an immigrant and welcomed by liberals lol
It's Apipu
You wrote "Arabic", meaning the language. Jesus spoke Hebrew. Also, the term "Arab" refers to people from the Arabian peninsula or people who speak Arabic. Jesus was a Jew from Israel who spoke Hebrew, so you can't really call him an Arab.
am I the only one who didn't know his range was that low?
edit: oh my jesus I was unaware this got that many likes
Ikr
Meowmeowcakes I'm pretty sure he's a bass.
i want him to make a full version of the grinch
He is Bass, Tenor and Alto!!
Actually, if you try to sing along, his range doesn't go that high. It's not his range that makes him amazing, it's his flawless intonation.
Jon's vocal range astonishes every time
I really needed a laugh today that was related to the holidays!
This was beautiful and amazing and so accurate.
It blows my mind that this was made in 2014!
Twist: no cuts, there's actually 4 of him irl
there's a fifth one holding the signs actually
My sister thought there were four of them
omg...four times the hot hahahaa
Xammi Marie bf
Want
it's the start of summer, what am I doing?
Watching progressive Christmas carols
Actually my Christmas is in summer...
mine too, im Brazilian
uggg now I am singing this! god school ill be fun
Same in Britain
I'm gonna throw this in my grandparents' faces
7 years later and my god this is all still relevant
It hurts
i actually would like to hear that entire Grinch arrangement...
tiger.kitten.91 oh yeah
Yes
yeah, it's my favorite part in the song. hearing the whole part would be fun, actually
A NEW PAINT VIDEO! WHAT IS IT, MY BIRTHD- oh wait it is.
Happy birthday :D
Hey, you've got a Tom Baker scarf!!!! Also, fezzes are cool.
HAPPY BIRFDAY
Congratulations ;)
Have fun today, and happy birthday!
Happy B-day :-)
My god it’s all still soo relevant
0:53 My jaw dropped in astonishment he was bold enough to make that joke...
Hes just pointing out the Progressitards who murder innocent children.
Same!
Jon has the widest fucking vocal range like wtf
Geneviève you may also like Brendon Urie then!
Formless Blob I just clicked on this comment to say the exact same thing!😱
Literally he was the first person I thought of too
dimash tho
I know right
"Don't walk the streets of whoville at night you might fight a cop the who's with not indict" damn is all I can say just damn
Whoa i literally was at that part of the song when i saw your comment
@Delaney Lovick he went there. he went there and bought property.
Just. Especially right now. Wow
@Delaney Lovick Why not watching it in June? I don't see a problem there
@Delaney Lovick I'm watching in July is that okay?
Is it even Christmas if I haven't watched this again?
Welcome back folks, It’s the time of year to crack out the paint 🥂
"He'll protect all your children \ well as long as they've been born." XD OMFG LMFAO
I died
My favorite part xD
Favorite part
I don't get it can someone please explain 😐
Tia Gray Pogressive groups in America support abortion. (Not that there's anything wrong with that)
Mary did you know, your baby boyyy
*is white*
*Yes*
awaaay in a manger with Jesus and crew
I think that this would work too:
Mary did you know that your baby boy
Is coming out as a gay
no
@@seakepp yes
I have a love hate relationship with how this is still relevant in 2019 😂
i saw this and burst out laughing.
oh boy, If only you knew. if only you knew....
Who’s gonna tell him
@@boomingbob1579 It hurts coming back to this every year 😭
@@LifeAsFiction it rlly does it’s sad seeing nowdats it’s the same thing
I find it hilarious that this has become a part of my personal collection of winter traditions
I love his harmonies with himself, omg so good!
"you're a green one, mr. grinch"... hmm... GREEN IS NOT A CREATIVE COLOUR!
Gaming Demon don't hug me I'm really really scared mom
Gaming Demon LMAO YAAAASSS😂😂😂👏👏👏👏
oh my god what was that from i cant remember for the life of me O_O
B1u3Soul it's from DHMIS (Don't Hug Me I'm Scared)
Gaming Demon OH YEAH! Thanks XD
9 years ago and it’s still amazing
I love how accurate it is still 8 years later
The Mr.Grinch one was my favorite part
Leilani Zenquiz
Right?! The Melody and the lyrics ❤️
ikr
Catsrule XD :3 the epic chorus though
Catsrule XD :3 And Oh holy night 😂😂
Catsrule XD :3 I just realized it was talking about racism in America. The part where they say your heart is 3/5’s normal, is relating to the 3/5’s compromise, which stated that only 3/5’s of slaves count in the states population and representation in electoral college.
There's tears from laughing and also from how beautiful this is
I know.... :3
Hey Vengelfe!
I know right! This guy is sooo good at singing! Also the lyrics were awesome!
( 0:53 )
ANNIE!
Yup
Anyone come back to these for the holidays or just me?
8 years on and it just got worse, but it looks like we are passed the Pinnacle of this crap and now there is hope and love that are winning ❤
Can we please get part 2 of this for Christmas this year?
YES
Allison Czaja YES PLEASE
Hi! He actually did a collab with ASAPScience and they did one called Secular Christmas Carols. It's really great if you want to check it out! :)
Cheyene Stoddard ahh Tysm I just checked it out and it was amazing
Allison Czaja NO apparently
jon's range goes from higher than my grades to lower than my sanity levels.
KatieBoydxo FJSKHFDKJG
Lower than my self esteem (:
True
KatieBoydxo oh good. It's not just me
1: I can't believe I just now saw this
2: This is incredible
3: In 2020, it's even more amazing
4: Who else came here from the coronavirus?
Relatability: 100%
the fact i havent heard this in years and i still know every lyric, and its all still so relevant is INSANE.
Full version of the Grinch song! Who's with me?
Yas
YESS
Yesss!
YA
DealWithIt me toooooooo
Racially ambiguous holiday made me laugh the hardest hands down
Same. The "Is too far?" got me too xD
I also love the "omniscient baby daddy" line
"Throw your hands up in the air-uh." and then pause! It's priceless XD
I literally saw your comment as soon as he sang it.
Lol same
I wanna just hear him singing oh holy night the actual full song... that would be so goooddd
ah yes it's october, time for christmas
Ah yes, it's April most definitely time for Christmas
It's that time of year again
I feel ya
March!
@David Knapp I am the 400th like
I wanna like ur comment but it has 666 likes and yeah you feel me right?
I got your 700th like
I love the four different personalities expressed in this video haha... especially after the abortion joke. The one on the lower left looks nervous as hell, the one on the lower right is mortified, and the one on the upper left just sort of looks back at the one that told the joke like "really dude?" XD
Toxic Khemicul i never understood the joke until last year 😂
the lower right one looks like did he actually just fucking say that?
Posted 8 years ago. Viewed Almost 14 million times. Still relevant
This is a go-to video every December.
In choir every time we sing these songs I have to remember that I can't use these lyrics. I had a solo this Christmas and almost fucked everything up singing o holy night.
Okay that fucking amazing. Let's be friends
Kylee Dunn Somehow this is just beautiful
Congrats on the solo :)
I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND!!!!! My choir had a performance today and one of the girls sang O Holy Night as a solo and in my mind I was thinking of this version and wondered why she was singing it wrong until I realized she wasn't.....
We had to sing the Little Mermaid for a performance in band, and I started singing Paint's version halfway through the song without realizing. Oops
"They say your heart is 3/5ths normal"
Ouch, I finally understand the reference
+savangel5 Whatd the reference?
+Mark Vadeika Wow okay. Thanks for the history lesson. That was... wow. (Sincerely though.)
Abby Tascone Why should I shush? I said it was very interesting and I thanked Mark.
I'm sorry I didn't read your comment all the way through.
Abby Tascone That's okay.
7 years ago and it still applies
POV: it’s December
Some of those harmony notes make me wish these were the original ones. My gosh, I need him singing the oh holy night
I showed this to my Youth Pastor and he just about died laughing
watching this after 3 years and your english skills have improved is a life changing experience oh my-
Welcome back y'all, everyone knows the true start of the Christmas season is when you start to get recommended random Christmas parodies! Time for "I wanna kill Santa claus" and "Karen Bells", oh what a wondrous time of the year~
Mhm
He uploaded another Christmas video yesterday! It's even darker than this one
@@jenniferliang17 It's amazing haha
I'm really liking this new "more than one video a year" thing.
HAHA, SAME!