Therapist Breaks Down Love is Blind’s Kwame & Chelsea | Is This The Real Thing?
Вставка
- Опубліковано 28 чер 2024
- In today's breakdown of Love Is Blind Season 4, we'll be analyzing Kwame and Chelsea's journey while talking about defense mechanisms, cognitive distortions, communication skills, and internalized racism. What did you learn from this analysis?
Marshall & Jackie: • Therapist Breaks Down ...
Zack & Bliss: • Therapist Breaks Down ...
Paul & Micah: • Therapist Breaks Down ...
Brett & Tiffany: • Therapist Breaks Down ...
TIMESTAMPS//
00:00 - Intro
00:26 - Disclaimer
01:03 - The Pods
06:02 - The Break Up
13:39 - The Second Choice
17:16 - The Real Thing
20:27 - The Proposal
22:30 - The Reveal
23:01 - Mexico
27:26 - Meeting the Family
32:14 - Compromises
34:39 - We're Not Okay
37:41 - The Boudoir Shoot
38:00 - Countdown to Wedding Day
40:44 - The Reunion
COAMFTE-ACCREDITED PROGRAMS//
coamfte.org/COAMFTE/Directory...
FIND A THERAPIST//
www.aamft.org/Directories/Fin...
WEBSITE//
www.whatsanyamind.com
SOCIAL MEDIA//
Instagram: / _steph.anya
Goodreads: Goodreads: / stephanya
Facebook: / steph.anya.fb
EXAM STUDY PREP (that I use)//
American Association for The Behavioral Sciences Study (AATBS) Volume I & II (15% Discount): www.talkable.com/x/0pWfTO
FOR MEDIA & SPONSORSHIP INQUIRIES//
Please email: stephanya@thestation.io
GEAR//
Camera: amzn.to/2xJoybv
Mic: amzn.to/2XPZjin
Flash: amzn.to/3czlgGI
Mic: amzn.to/2ZxBDA4
Audio Recorder: amzn.to/3bUKG0J
Flash: amzn.to/3czlgGI
Lighting: amzn.to/2XnyQaa
Theme Song:
Prod. NDO: / ndovert
Prod. Mari Beats: / @maribeats
#therapistreacts #loveisblindseason4
Steph I need us to campaign for you to be the hired therapist on the show for next season. You are EVERYTHING Queen!
If she was a therapist for them she couldn’t make these videos because they’d have a professional and confidential relationship
Was just about to comment the same thing!!!!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Agreed 💯
That would be cool but the show would probably try to manipulate her and she wouldn't allow that minipulation
💯
Steph, you should have your own dang show. Your insight and camera presence is phenomenal.
Aw thank you so much!
Right? I’m addicted
Yes i agree!!! My husband and I are watching and learning! ❤❤❤
Is this not her own show?
Agree I learn so muchhh
Outside of the two inappropriate conversations with Micah, the hardest thing to watch was Chelsea's affection for him right after the marriage. She was hugging him, facing HIM, "trying" to look in his eyes, but he was facing forward, no eye contact, couldn't even utter the words "you're MY wife." And this wasn't edited either. Just a straight shot at his feelings of being married to her.
Kwame is so awkward and bad at lying. His annoying face betrayed his tiny heart in every moment but none worse than after the wedding
That was pathetic she was holding onto him like a kite about to fly away
Yea, when he said yes at the alter and she nearly flipped over I didn’t like that for her. She was overly excited and didn’t seem like he had the same excitement
He’s just camera awkward,it’s not that deep y’all,the man has been married for a year now lol he can leave if he wants
@@snowwolfieplays9978 what you not gone do is put what other people said onto me. You don’t know if he was camera shy or if he wasn’t all that into her like many people and professional relationships counselors saw. As far as your second part saying they are married for a year, that’s great. I wish them nothing but the best. However, it still doesn’t prove he was just awkward. He could have learned to appreciate her over the course of that year. Just because you see a couple happy now doesn’t mean they was always. I saw the man disrespect his fiancé at her own birthday party and on their engagement trip with another woman. It ain’t that deep because it’s not my relationship but that sure was “awkward” to watch.
I am kinda glad Kwame was not emotionally open with Micah in that moment of her breaking off their communication. We saw how she used his suggestion of proposing to her at some point against him in Mexico, I could only imagine what she would've said if he cried in front of her. I saw it as him not feeling safe in that moment (or with her in general).
And he was right, she's not a "safe" person.
YOU should be the psychiatrist, idk wtf this girl talking about in the video 🧐🤨 shes speaking from her own personal feelings, not the words of a PSYCHIATRIST
@@josephselfmade1 she’s a psychologist. Psychiatrists go through medical school and medically treat. Psychologists are therapists
I’m glad to see someone say this. I thought his reaction was appropriate. I thought to myself that he knew a bit of her character (which she made very clear with how she broke it off) and he matched energy basically.
@@josephselfmade1 sorry, when did she ever relate this to anything in her own story or background? She’s using many many years of schooling, training and experience as a PSYCHOLOGIST to come to these conclusions, so she IS being the “psychiatrist”
My read on Kwame denying his feelings when talking to Micah was that it was a reaction to how cold and matter of fact she was. He’s reflecting that back to her. She didn’t seem to show any emotions or have any empathy for him. Like once she was done with him, she just quickly disposed of him. It was so transactional. Compare to Paul and how much he struggled with hurting Amber. I would be reluctant to open up and be vulnerable with her too.
I agree that Micah was very cold and i would not want to open up to her either. But I think he is the type of person who doesn't want to show any negative emotion at all. This video actualy brings it up more than once, how Kwame is consistently shoving his emotions down so no one can see he's hurting.
I think her cold treatment is one of the things that led Paul to says she’s not motherly or nurturing. She’s not a naturally warm & fuzzy person.
@@bluebutterfly5062 True. I see Chelsea being very controlling and dismissive at times, which would only validate his reluctance to speak up. Seems like the few times he did try to discuss his “negative” feelings she shut him down with “welcome to marriage” or vaguely threatened exposing him somehow. So I wonder if he is the way he is because this is a dynamic that’s familiar and comfortable for him…so much so that it presents in all his relationships and interactions. I almost got the feeling that he said yes at the altar because he caved under pressure, being unable to disappoint Chelsea, the guests, his sister, her family, etc. Seems like a people pleaser and will go to extreme lengths to avoid spreading negative vibes (god forbid).
Im just happy paul left her at the altar🤣🤣 Micah was such a mean girl.
I think this too. Yeah, Kwame was into Micah -- but the ice with which she ended the relationship was beyond jarring. That might cause anyone to question if any of the sentiment was real. It's not just the "what" (a break up) but the "how" (impersonal). That type of coldness could make anyone doubt their own discernment -- or if they had just been played for the cameras. (A whole different level of grief - not just heartbreak but made to look foolish.)
At the pool confrontation, at first I thought Kwame was actually starting to see Micah's true colors -- and see thru the gaslighting. It might have been why he made time to confront her in the first place. Still he lingered WAAAAY to long with her - likely because she seemed to validate that she really may have cared for him... but I think some realities of her nature and behavior may have set in once he stepped away and had time to play it all back.
During the reunion he noted that all interactions with her for the rest of the show were to drive a narrative. I found that statement interesting. To me, I think he finally saw thru Micah's need to be the "desired" one and was deliberate in his interactions with her from that point forward.
my family and i bumped into chelsea and kwame at disneyland the other day!! it was totally random but the two of them were so kind and chatted with us for a few minutes and took some pictures with us. absolutely lovely couple in person also chelsea was much shorter than i thought she was😂
In the lyrics of his "The Real Thing" song, Kwame says "she said that we gonna have to wait a couple days but I just want to show her now". I remember when he and Micah were talking in the beginning in the Pods, he said he wanted to propose to her early and Micah hesitated and didn't seem ready for that. This makes me feel he originally wrote the song for Micah.
oh wow...chelsea/kwame are going to end up like iyanna/jarett in my opinion
I was too distracted by his angelic voice to pay attention to the lyrics.
That guitar was out of tune, his voice is nice but yeah that song 😬
my concern for Chelsea and Kwame's marriage in the long run is that Kwame's decision to uproot and move for the sake of their relationship may lead to resentment if it is not appreciated by Chelsea. This is a significant decision that requires thoughtful consideration and open communication between the partners to ensure a healthy and sustainable relationship
Nah they’ll make it work because they are both delusional
Same. It seems that he is sacrificing A LOT, and she hasn't had to do that. Idk if I see their marriage lasting. I hope the best for them tho!
My thoughts exactly. Chelsea, at least on camera, didn’t show much appreciation and oftentimes dismissed his worries. He was clearly resenting it with that “Seattle is overpriced” speech 😬
Well maybe he shouldn’t have been on a dating show that was based in Seattle.
In the reunion , I felt Kwame was WAY more settled and even happy with his life. In the show -- he was facing a lot of unknowns -- but now that a year has passed, he's in Seattle, has a great apartment and has been able to build a life with Chelsea outside of the cameras, my read from the reunion is that he's now very happy, calm and secure with Chelsea. The unknowns are all resolved.
I’m glad you spoke on the fetishization bit about Chelsea. I thought I was the only one who got that vibe from her through scenes in the show.
He seems to enjoy it or at least play along with it.
Righttt
Like I was kinda annoyed nobody was saying it all through the season
I thought about this but then I wondered if she’s just a very sexual and lusting person which i think is possible too.
@@abigailllllllllll yeah I think she is a very sexual person. If I remember correctly, she was having sexual convos in the pods as well. I also think it’s possible to be both her sexual nature and in fact it’s a type of fetish as well.
@@jakestroll6518 I think given his implied history of dating outside of his race, he’s probably used to it. Or maybe just unaware that it could exist entirely.
Can you please do a video on Tiffany and Brett. It’s always interesting to see why these couples don’t work but it would be nice to see what makes a relationship healthy and how we could implement that in our own relationships.
I think Brett is downlow. Those are the vibes I got.
@@marigoldbeam5475 what does that mean
@@TheAnaisRose bi
@@TheAnaisRose Usually it means someone who is specifically gay but not out, and often in a hetero relationship but having gay relationships or sex secretly on the side (as compulsory heterosexuality/heteronormativity is definitely very real in many cultures including the US). It's not really a nice thing to say about someone as it implies dishonesty/trickery, while discounting the pressure many queer people feel to deny their identities leading to things like living "on the down low." I don't know why those would be the vibes someone would get from Brett??
@@mellowfern I understand that this may minimize the pressure that many gay people feel, but I think it is also understandable that heterosexuals are cautious of people who live "on the down low," because in an interpersonal relationship, you have to take care of yourself and protect your feelings. Being in a relationship with someone who hides who they are is not only detrimental to the homosexual person, but also to the heterosexual person as well. The person who keeps a low profile is not only hurting themselves, they can also destroy someone else's life. And even if you can understand why they did it, it is still dishonest and can literally destroy the life of another person who didn't ask to be dragged into this. But yeah I don't get that vibe from Brett either. A guy who likes to take care of himself does not make him gay. People can be extra cautious and any stereotypical "sign" are overinterpreted.
I spent the entire season feeling badly for Chelsea. Micah doesn't hold a candle to her and I think she's a bad actor. When Kwame cried over her, I was speechless. It was obvious Micah played him. I also think she was playing Paul but he was smart enough to say, "I don't ". I didn't expect Kwame to say yes at the altar but I think he did the right thing.
Why do u think she was playing Paul? I never thought of that before
She didn't seem invested in Paul to me.
I think she just wanted to be on the show.
Chelsea’s great, hope they both grow in love with one another.
Why do people keep saying that she was playing both of them? What would Micha gain by playing anyone? I think she did like Paul but the issue is Micha finds it hard to express her feelings. She is guarded. However, I love her relationship with Paul's mom.
This video helped me realize I dated someone just like Kwame. The internalized racism (understandable, but still toxic), the consistent repression of emotions and denial, the desire to have a partner that makes you "feel good" but thinking that's the only thing that matters in the relationship.
There was even a "Micah" that I was obviously competing with but was too in denial to see it.
Safe to say, it didn't last long lol
I feel you. I had the same situation. He wanted that I sacrifice everything for our relationship. I had to decide between him and my family. It's ridiculous and super toxic. I hope you feel better ❤
Damn sorry that happened, the best lessons cost the most
I had a Kwame and Micah situation as well. She was his coworker. He dealt with internalized racism as well. I was codependent back then, that relationship lasted a couple of years and then I put an end to it. Got therapy and never looked back.
When people talk about the "Kwame claimed that he was breaking up with Micah" thing, people always completely overlook that he tried to propose to her early and she had to put the breaks on it. I don't think that he was just upset because it was a breakup. I think that he was trying to marry her. I also think "The Real Thing" song was written for Micah. Because he said something about how she said that needed time or a few days or something like that but Chelsea never seemed to say that to him but we know that Micah did. I really didn't want Kwame and Chelsea to both say "yes' because I think that she 2nd best to him or like he just accepted her because she was there and Chelsea deserved better than that.
Did she really deserve better than that? She didnt seem too keen on his character... She seemed keen on settling down and she got what she wanted.
I propose that Netflix gets rid of the Lacheys and replaces them with Steph and Kirk Honda. Then you can give commentary play by play of each episode as it’s happening like sports announcers
Love Dr Honda!
The only other guy who sobbed and cried over a heartbreak like Kwame in the pods was Jarrette… 🥴
and we all know how that ended 🫣
💀💀💀
And both of the 1st picked girls that ended it (Mallory and Micah) got engaged to someone else (Sal and Paul), and both were rejected by their fiances at the alter. Damn what a parallel lol now just to wait for the divorce announcement from Chelsea and Kwame
Exactly!!!
And people were comparing Jarette/Iyanna/Mallory to Zack/Bliss/Irina
When Zack only cried when HE broke up with Bliss and didn't gaf when It ended with Irina
Like make it make sense
Can’t wait! Can you do Zack and Bliss next pretty please? I binged on your Cole and Zanab videos and got hooked and now I want more more more.
Yes! I’ll do them next. Thanks for bingeing 🥰
Can't wait!!!!!
I want her to do Zack and Bliss so bad cause they are my favorites but I also had some reservations about their relationship so I wanna see if they align with Steph!
could we also get one on brett/tiffany? an example of healthy love that we haven't seen since season one
@@StephAnya we are still waiting 😭😭 Steph I check your channel every minute😅
I was today years old when i learnt you can gaslight yourself. Makes me more mindful of my self talk
It’s funny you mentioned how Kwame kept focusing on how the women made him feel. I’ve noticed that when people talk about what makes a particular woman amazing, it’s always about what she does for others (whereas with men, it’s about their achievements). Women are just inherently expected to do for others and that’s what makes them “great”. Not sure what I’m trying to say, but it’s just something I’ve seen throughout my whole life.
The most confusing part about that mess of a reunion was Kwame's decision to lie about wanting to break up with Micah first. How come no one asked him about him crying after and the fact that he kind of proposed to her already at that point?? I dont see how he could say he was going to break it off and why would that even be a necessary thing to stay and cling to?!
He might have told the truth about that. After Micah told him to just keep dating instead of getting engaged, it was a blow to Kwame in itself. Then he explained that their dates kept getting shorter and shorter, so I believe him when he says he was going to end it. Not because he wasn't in love with Micah, but because he felt like she wasn't into him enough, and he needed his partner to show him her love. He might have not been fully prepared to dump her, yet, when Micah pulled the plug. And the way she did it, totally unempathetically, like you toss something to the garbage bin... even though he prepared himself to let go of Micah (or the fantasy of them being together), that one must have really hurt him nonetheless.
@andaredvex I get it and honestly I feel for him, he seems like not a bad guy and seeing anyone cry is heartbreaking. But I still have a hard time believing he's been truthful, especially seeing how he acted in Mexico. Didn't he even say so himself that he still needed closure? It doesn't seem like it was a mutual decision like they're trying to say it was, is all...
Still don’t understand how everyone keeps thinking that Kwame actually cried…it was rly bad acting he could not shed one single tear lol
@@everberry51 you must be the only one detecting genuine human emotions. *sarcasm*
@@devochkadee I'm with you. If he wanted so much to break up with her, why Paul was the enemy of his story? That's the big question. And when Micah broke up with him, it seems to me that he was ready to really propose this time.
We need you on the show itself to help the cast work through their issues! You could even host the reunion.
I second this! We need a petition lol
Let's speak it!
I'm just glad that someone else called out the "gaslighting" that Kwame tried to do to us during the reunion talking about it was a mutual letting go of each other between him and Micah while we saw him sob after she let him go, we saw how he acted when he saw her at the pool party and at Chelsea's birthday, we heard him attempt to ask her to be his and marry him in the pods giving an analogy of Khaki pants vs. black jeans (Micah being the Khaki pants he wore that day). I'm just glad you brought the video evidence from the show as well. I feel for Chelsea because ride or die women mostly/often end up with men who aren't ride or die for them and that Kwame knew this about her and still took her throoooough it during the show is juuuuuust......smh! I'm afraid for their marriage, i fear it will not last because the foundation is lies on one end and delusion on the other
Chile... If you go on Instagram, you're going to be so annoyed: the gaslighting is strong. He and a bunch of adoring fans are just there trying to tell us we didn't see what we saw. And then even when they acknowledge that Kwame wasn't really affectionate towards Chelsea, they say it's the edit- that he always loved her/ she was it since day 1
No matter how internalized the racism is for Kwame, no matter how assimilated into the dominant culture he has become, one thing would not change for him...... Ghanaian men prefer women with a bit more meat on their bones and Chelsea is rail thin. Micah is a bit more curvy.... Already that is one dimension where he is deceiving himself about his attraction to her. And then to completely lose yourself???.... when he begins to mature emotionally, which one hopes does happen, he will wake up and blame Chelsea for controlling him and not allowing him to be "a black man"...... Time reveals all things. I feel sorry for him. I hope no children are involved in that disfunction.
Gaslighting is an emotional abuse technique. He’s not gaslighting you/the people watching but he is almost certainly being dishonest with himself and everyone watching
@Hannah-wg7hx thanks for your comment, incase you didn't notice, gaslighting is in quotes
Steph mentioning "when Kwame asked Chelsea well did you see them (Chelsea's exes) as life partners" had me go like omgggg so much learning here! Thank you for doing these videos Steph. Taking notes for my relationship.
Kwame made a cast iron decision when he was chosen for the show. He was going to get married and make it work with someone BE DAMNED. He tried out for Married At First Sight prior to this show so we know he was hungry for this kind of exposure and experience. While Chelsea seemed way more invested in the relationship, he was way more invested in staying in the show. I hope they landed somewhere genuine and find happiness together even though some of their story was cringey. Another thing I don’t understand is why a contestant would go on this show and then hesitate about saying yes at the end because their mom or dad refuse to play a part. Didn’t they know where the patent stood when they signed up? They should have a resolve about about following through regardless of those family dynamics or don’t go on this kind of show.
Kwame didn't seem genuine to me. He got rejected and went for the second choice. He disrespected his fiancé at the pool. I think Chelsea was more into him than he was into her. She decided she wasn't walking out without a husband.
Bingo. It won’t last he’ll get bored and annoyed quickly.
QUEEN!!! you just gave words to the discomfort much of the audience (myself included) couldn't vocalize. breath of fresh air. i couldn't quite put my finger on it.
I always thought Kwame would say yes - it seems like 100% of the people who get rejected but choose to explore a different connection (Jarrett, Colleen, now Kwame) have said yes at the altar (even in difficult & controversial circumstances!!)
I've been checking for this on the daily
See you soon!!
SAAAAAMMMEEE. I had some mixy-mashy feelings about this one and I'm excited to hear your perspective, Steph-Anya!
Me too!!!!
I ABSOLUTELY felt the internalized racism from Kwame, my husband and I was watching it and got real sus vibes from him
I think every black woman had his number REAL quick. I was talking to my white friend and she said Kwame was her favorite and it felt like I was in the Twilight Zone!
@@mundaneamazing I like Kwame. He has issues but I don't hate him. I just didn't think he was good enough for Chelsea. You don't have to hate people who have internalized racism. It is just the way it is. I don't judge him for that
@@lisah8438 yeah I don’t dislike him, he’s just sus and probably someone I wouldn’t associate with in REAL life but he’s quite the character to watch
I don't want bad things to happen to him. 🤨
I, personally, really have no space in my life for ANYONE who actively practices white supremacy, whether malicious or internalized.
I hope he does some self-work and takes some guitar lessons.
I definitely also got off vibes from him the entire season. I really just skipped over he and Chelsea parts cuz it seemed soo cringed.
Wow amazing observations about the shopping conversation and Chelsea trying to curate her image and their image as a couple. The perfect couple image was important to her. Or being seen as the love story of the century couple on LIB and having a false external validation that would justify forcing the outcome she was imposing.
I love how balanced you always are. Thank you! I always agree with pretty much everything you say 😄
Thank you!
Watching him cry was so sad 😭 but then he just check out for rest of the season. Fake zombie smile the whole rest of the experience 😅
Great video! Re: the slow burn, Micah was talking about her relationship with Paul. She told Kwame that she loved their relationship but she wanted to ultimately go with the "slow burn" thing she had going with Paul. She'd previously talked about Paul as being her slow burn relationship several times.
Exactly! Thanks for pointing out the slow burn thing out. It was in deed with reference to her and Paul’s situation. I was gonna comment that, glad I dnt have to anymore 😅
That's what I thought...
I love your analyses! Can’t wait for your breakdown of Tiffany and Brett!
I'm really looking forward to that one!
You are so good. I just spent the all day watching your videos. I am French and I waited until 1:30am to watch it. All black people should watch it. And I liked your comment on Kwame not putting aside his culture during the wedding
I found it interesting that they have a stable healthy relationship and barely got any air time, Brett’s pants didn’t fit and that was the biggest issue and he showed gratitude towards the tailor, I liked Tiffany and Brett by far the best
@@blakeharrison3972 hands down, best couple of the series imo. So dang cute!!!
I don't buy the Tiffany Brett thing. Tiffany is clearly besotted and sincere, but I got red flags with Brett, to be honest I cannot shake the feeling he is downlow.
Your content is SO incredibly valuable not only for us reality TV enthusiast, but also serving simply as advice to take on for our own relationships!
On the metaphors, its very common for West Africans to use metaphorical imagery often and in regular conversation
In the words of @jessiewoo, “Chelsea, you are the KHAKIS!”
I nominate you to host next season. ALL SEASON, not just the reunion. Your insight is so perfect!
Steph Anya: “if you’re curious, stay tuned”
Me: 😳
🤣
me: 🤓
The Real Thing was definitely written for Micah. The first verse is “you say you need more time”….. ick
Omg
Chelsea watched the whole season and still chose to be blind that she was a second choice. Kwame was lying that whole reunion about his feelings for Micah and I hate how he’s like it was a year ago it doesn’t matter. Bro we just watched it be honest lol. That Africa necklace was so fake like the internalized racism was still there. I’m also not feeling Chelsea cuz she keeps ignoring his concerns to stay in lala land. She deff fetishized kwame
This was the most frustrating couple for me all season. I see two decent people trying to force a square peg into a round hole.
Steph you are great. I love this analysis. It was spot-on based on the edited content we saw. I also agree I hope they work out and stay together. I can't wait for my two favorite couples Zach and Bliss and Brett and Tiffany
Thank you! I’m looking forward to those as well
The way I thought Kwame was adopted until his family came on the screen 💀💀💀
Mostly because of his hairline 🤣🤣🤣
Kwame sounds very rehearsed, comes off as disingenuous at times. I wonder if that's the "theatre personality" coming out and maybe i am reading him wrong
I got the same vibe. Like _he_ doesn't even believe what he's saying, so he has to convince you and himself...or something like that
I think he works in sales, I believe that’s why his responses are so professional sounding even when he speaks to people close to him.
I didn't see Kwame's reaction to Micah breaking up with him as either Repression or Denial. To me, that was pure masking. He seemed to be conscious of what he was feeling the whole time, but didn't feel safe to express that emotion in front of the person who hurt him.
Of course I'm no therapist, it's only that this is exactly the kind of thing I might do. But I might be misinterpreting what qualifies as Repression.
When you’re scrambling getting ready to leave for a big event with your partner, nothing can strengthen your relationship as much as acknowledging each other’s stress. Empathizing with the other person. And choosing to walk through it as a team. Then reflecting on things you can jointly do to lessen that stress next go around!
Let me be real, I had been checking Dr. Steph's channel DAILY for the last month hoping she would do LIB season 4. I couldn't WAIT to get her take on all of this mess. If LIB creators had any sense, they would ask Dr. Steph to be the therapist for the show because they NEED Her Help!!!
I always look forward to your insight when it comes to Love Is Blind!! Excellent as always
We need a part 2 Steph! I've been so hooked, you are really just flawless ❤
These are all the things I was feeling but couldn't quite articulate. You are so insightful and you handled the tricky topics about this with a lot of grace.
Ooooooooohhh! Your perspective and analysis is not only incredible to look at them, but you offer great insights to look at ourselves. Thank you for all that you do!
SUCH a good video!!! You spoke on things I thought and then added some extra perspective. Hopefully, those two can learn and grow! ❤
I love to see how your love is blind video's are getting your channel the popularity it deserves
Your breakdowns are literally the reason I keep watching love is blind!! This is sooo good and so entertaining.. my absolutely favorite part about the “series” ❤
I watched the entire 4th season wondering what you were gonna say about certain couples/situations. I have been so excited for this! 😅💓
This is such a great breakdown, can't wait for the others
Such good break down! Please keep them coming :)
Man thank you for articulating this and I just love how organize your thoughts are. I’m in the internship phase of my master program for clinical psych and I really struggle with articulation at times. Watching you really helps 🙏🏽💛
I really enjoyed hearing about the show through such a thoughtful lens. I came away seeing Kwame and Chelsea differently. Great video!
Man oh man, I just LOVE you and your videos!
To be honest, I don't watch Love is Blind or shows like it because I can get too frustrated and flustered about all the weird dynamics and obvious mind games going on. However, watching your videos provides the perfect cushion that what I observe is actually real! Plus the addition of your personal and professional insights, which are GOLDEN.
Another huge thing I got out of this particular video --- I finally understand what 'passive aggressive' means!!! I've always had a hard time identifying these kind of statements, even when I use them myself. But, oh my word, when you said it's 'passing' things over to the other person? Eureka!! Thank you for this new lens to see things through, seriously!
Hope you're well, thanks for all your work!
I never comment but you must know how thankful I am for your videos! You put words to things that I can't, validate weird feelings, bring light to things that make no sense to me and sooo much more! And you do it all fairly and eloquently! ❤
I agree with everything you said, except Kwame’s expression of Seattle being overpriced. Housing and items in Seattle are extremely expensive, so I completely understand what he was saying. Considering what Seattle has to offer in activities/attractions and the bad weather, the price tag doesn’t make sense.
"Still in the process of grieving this sense of rejection. " Wow. I needed to hear this after my first online dating experience. S/n: I love your lip color here!
Love your videos!!!! Thank you for spending the time to edit and create these videos!!!! YOU SLAY QUEEEN
Thanks so much for watching!!
That video was intructive. I have learn so many as a French with african roots. But I am pretty sure Kwame is brillant and he's doing his although his is facing and faced so many issues due cultural differences and internalized rascim. For us, African, we're raised with the fact that whatever your age, your parents have things to say, snd you've to listen. I think it might have been a huge issue to get married without his mom and love deeply Chelsea to gi throught it ❤🎉 I woke up til 1:30am to listen to you! You have a big French fan here !
The way I dropped everything when I saw that this video was posted 😂 I LOVE your discussions and the vocabulary you’re giving us to process TV/our personal relationships
Love these videos! It feels like we get the real behind the scenes, since they often won’t dive deep into it themselves lol
Thank you!!!!
I was thinking she was fetishizing him as well.
The way they were presented, their chemistry looked questionable.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I was looking forward to your analysis while watching the show. 👏🏽
I didn't necessarily see her fetishizing him, but it would explain how she sees him as so perfect and overlooks almost every questionable thing he says or way he acts.
I chalked it up to her just being desperate for marriage. Especially with the photoshoot thing. I've dated men where I look around and I'm like "You were just trying to find a girlfriend to fit into your puzzle and you're not even seeing me for who I am."
Can we talk about how Chelsea & Kwame said in the reunion that they did NOT watch the season? Just seems like their own way to keep each of their delusions going. I think they both know that Kwame doesn’t like Chelsea and watching the playback would be hard for them to stay attached their delusions
I didn’t hear this in the reunion. I completely agree though. If they watched the season they WOULD have to question the lies they are telling themselves
Chelsea said she watched the scene where he talked to Micah at the pool though....
@@haileymorris174 Interesting. Thx for sharing this. The Chelsea character saw what was happening from afar and so to get an up close view of that and watch it would definitely be painful but not something she would had been unaware of. Also it is a scene where the Chelsea character is victimized by Kwame and Micah - and I like Chelsea generally speaking don't get me wrong on that part - but if she had a look at the rest of episodes she might see some of her own problematic behaviours to get her and her husband to the alter and have to question it.
@@dariasmeh I agree she had her flaws but I think she can be reasonable when needed...
Maybe she didn't watch in full and just watched that scene to get context 🤷🏼♀️ but that would open an old wound without getting anything else out of watching.
@@haileymorris174 She had reasonable moments - I observed this, yes. I think she has a kind base in her approach and personality. This makes me believe she is like a few steps away from allowing herself to have a healthy romantic relationship with someone. But for now, her goal to get to the alter really obstructs her. Odd, the thing we think will facilitate us really in fact obstructs us to love.
I love these vudeos and all the details and fair analysis you give!
Hey Steph, I would love for you to make a video on "how to recover from a toxic relationship". I know it's a veeery complex theme, but it's something I've been working through in therapy and it would be amazing for more people to hear about it. Or even know what to expect of the process, if that makes any sense.
(Unfortunately) I really identified with the relationship breakdown you made in the last video. I feel like I was the one who was the "emotional rock", and had a more secure attachment style. Over time, I became so tired to be in that position to my (now ex) boyfriend - while he had an extremely anxious attachment style... I don't know at what point I started to forget my own feelings and getting caught up in his emotional manipulation (even though he wasn't conscious about it) and behaving according to his own projections on our relationship :/
Steph - I love your videos, perspective and insights as always!! I feel like I learn so much every time. I love that you identify the actions with the appropriate terms and break down what that is and more examples. I feel like I’m in a classroom while being entertained! Thank you!
Also random side note - this entire video I’m just thinking “man what lip combo is she’s using?!” Truly a beautiful color on you!!
Just now watching all your Love is Blind videos, but I really appreciate your objective analysis on each couple and explanations behind each of their behaviors. I feel like I am not only learning more about psychology in general, but also reflecting on my own behavior and it is really interesting and informative. Thank you!!
love your energy and videos!! thank you for the wonderful content
I was very shocked that Kwame said yes at the altar 😮 I honestly feel like he thinks about Chelsea’s feelings more than his. Throughout the entire show Chelsea didn’t seem to consider his feelings much so I think he got use to that. He definitely wanted Micah initally! He’s an absolute lie saying he didn’t. That man was crushed when she ended things with him 💔 so he settled for Chelsea. I picked up on that fetishism or whatever was going on when they met 😳 seemed like he was a bit uncomfortable with all of that. Like you stated, she soothed his ego which is all he ever wanted. It’ll be interesting to see what transpires throughout the years.
I think there was a level of fetishism on both ends. Kwame wants a white woman and Chelsea wants a black man and kids. It could have been any black man, but I think Kwame wanted a certain type of white woman (ie. Micah). The disconnect for Kwame was that she was attracted to what he hated most about himself, his blackness. But at the end of the day he couldn’t deny Chelsea was everything bc he wanted: white with an accepting family.
@@ryenne8919 girl you cracked the code
I always look forward to these❤️
So glad I made it for the premiere!
Me too!
Thank you, darling. Keep helping us hear what we can't hear on our own.
I love your vids! The one about Zenab was especially helpful for me as I was one to self sabotage due to insecurities. I have been so much more mindful since watching your video and zenabs story unfold!
I always wait for your next video about those couples, it teaches me a lot about relationships and psychology. I really love it 🙌
Your explanations are so thorough! I love these breakdowns!
This was one of your best, most insightful analyses. So well done, Steph❤👏🏽
Thank you so much!
My favorite part of this series is not only the examples you provide but also the vocabulary words. Would love to see more examples of what a better alternative is, like a script since not everyone is good with their words. Thanks!!
Got my snack and a drink and I'm ready to watch!!
So excited for this video!
whatcha snacking on??
Was waiting for this one!!
You are so good at this !! Love your content !❤
That was so interesting! Watching your videos is very informative and you put specific words on feeling I had a hard time defining while watching Kwame and Chelsea. You nailed it! At this point they need you on that show sis lol.
wow 3 mins in and you already have me pausing to reflect on myself. I don't think I've ever heaard of modifying your self to be perceieved a certain way as also being internalized racism. Or maybe it never resonated the way it did hearing you explain..oof big pill to swallow. You're incredible Steph! It's such a pleasure to watch your videos :)
I just found your channel and I am hooked. I love your insight and I am learning quite a lot.
New subscriber. This was so insightful .... I'll definitely keep watching any other ones!
Thank you for this video. Always enjoy watching it
I've been waiting for this one!
Keep this up, love your breakdowns...❤
I love your banter on this one. It's really witty.
I love your videos!! Youre such an amazing speaker and therapist!!
I LIVE FOR THESE BREAKDOWNS ❤️
I was as shocked as you were when he said yes. It was the plot twist of the decade tbh... I think them defending their relationship at the reunion was based on how they were after the show. Because we all watched you know 😂 It's okay to say you started off rough but you've worked on it. It's a year later, you've obviously evolved
I honestly feel like Kwame is settling for Chelsea. I don’t think she’s a bad person. I feel like he said yes at the alter because he didn’t want to embarrass her in front of everyone. From his body language it didn’t seem like he was completely sure on that
I am a new subscriber and I’m here for your channel! You broke down this beautifully and professionally 🤗
Your analysis is amazing....should totally have your own TV show
I learn so much just listening to you that I can apply to my relationships. I just want to say Thank you!! Thank you so much!