Father Creates Safe Space For Gay Son. “It's Important To Talk To The Children About Everything.”

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  • Опубліковано 15 жов 2019
  • When Freddy’s teenage son started withdrawing, he knew something was up. Suspecting it might be related to his sexuality, Freddy sought to maintain an open line of communication with his son - and became a strong ally and defender in the process.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 370

  • @metro3692
    @metro3692 4 роки тому +707

    You were made to be a father. The world needs more fathers like you.

    • @Rapha2587
      @Rapha2587 4 роки тому +31

      ​@@michaelcaza-schonberger9282 the world needs more people that mind their own business, it would be enough! Take the hint.

    • @tonystark4434
      @tonystark4434 4 роки тому +14

      Michael Caza-Schonberger yeah what Rapha said

    • @imsooverit620
      @imsooverit620 4 роки тому +26

      Diva Hair the worst act? I feel like murdering someone is the worst act anyone can partake in...

    • @owentrebashi776
      @owentrebashi776 4 роки тому

      PERIODDD!!!

    • @Dignity100
      @Dignity100 4 роки тому +2

      Yes, they do!

  • @cfc59
    @cfc59 4 роки тому +279

    This is a father who really loves his child! The world needs more dads like you, Freddie!

    • @cindyjones6441
      @cindyjones6441 4 роки тому

      cfc59 Fred is the sons name.

    • @annah.6903
      @annah.6903 3 роки тому +1

      @@cindyjones6441 read the caption of the video! :)

  • @jerandzanes3455
    @jerandzanes3455 4 роки тому +262

    As a clinical psychologist I tell parents to talk less and listen more.

  • @Ted655687653
    @Ted655687653 4 роки тому +5

    Thank you for being a good Dad. I'm gay and my parents are/were the worse parents you could imagine. As a kid, I knew how much they hated gay people and so I didn't tell them until I graduated college and they were furious that they WASTED all that money on me and my education. Things never got better, they only got worse to the point that I stopped all communication with them. They ended up turning all the family against me. Family members that had responded well to my coming out would eventually sent me letters that condemned me. At the hand of my manipulative mother, l even received hate-filled letters from the members of the family that are secretly gay and secretly bisexual. My family is a sea of hate. I'm glad Fred has you as a father. You are making a big difference in his life. The world needs more Dads like you.

    • @dirkandi
      @dirkandi 4 роки тому +1

      I hope you are in a good place now!!!

  • @phillipleboa5251
    @phillipleboa5251 4 роки тому +249

    You are a REAL MAN. God bless you !!!

  • @orlando1a1
    @orlando1a1 4 роки тому +278

    I wish I had a dad like him - what an enlightened, thoughtful and amazing man. When things got tough for his son, he didn't desert him and quite possibly saved him from goodness knows what awful fate.

    • @suvariboy
      @suvariboy 4 роки тому +6

      Me too. My family disowned me when I came out.

    • @vaerldsmusik
      @vaerldsmusik 4 роки тому +14

      Ouch... I don’t always understand parents fears, and how when “gay” becomes a factor, everything changes. It is the same son/daughter the only difference is suddenly gay is a factor. Love is unconditional. Because someone is gay doesn’t mean the love stops. Was t there in the first place? Has this just been being tolerated? I know the so-called “Christians” can reject people for being gay-even when Jesus made unconditional love, the foundation of his beliefs: reject gays they reject Jesus-that isn’t Christian. Still, I gasp when a parent or anyone rejects someone for being gay. Yes, it is fear, but what happened to love?
      One of my sons was (that is past tense because he died of AIDS-related illnesses) gay. I was not sure what he was, but stressed that I loved him no matter what. I wanted him to know he was not alone, that someone loved I’m and was there to love and support him.
      My other son is non-gay, but he got the same love and support.
      Those sons were my PR team as I had their friends come to talk with me about things they should have talked with their own parents.
      Once I asked one why he came to talk with me. He said I was the “cool” parent who he felt would listen objectively. While it is flattering to be the “cool” parent, it is the trust and compassion that was triggered.
      I have seen and heard about too many people gay and non-gay, who found that they either had difficulty or felt they couldn’t talk with a parent because that parent might be negative or was negative about various issues including sexuality.
      I would liked to have been there for these two lads. The “disowned” lad must have faced a horrible time. Who were the un-loving people who could reject their own child. I would be deeply hurt and feel betrayed by such monsters: how could they be my parents? Did they ever love me? and so forth.
      I hope things are better.

    • @ChiquitaSalseraOne
      @ChiquitaSalseraOne 4 роки тому +5

      suvariboy You are worthy of the highest love just as you are.

    • @stevemoore9509
      @stevemoore9509 4 роки тому +3

      @@suvariboy I am so sorry about your situation. Hope you have friends or other loves ones to accept you.

  • @geolee9522
    @geolee9522 4 роки тому +92

    My life would have been a million times better with a father like this man.

    • @samray397
      @samray397 3 роки тому +1

      YOU will make yr life SHINE! CHANGE STARTS FROM WITH-IN!

  • @sebastianboeddinghaus3505
    @sebastianboeddinghaus3505 4 роки тому +119

    I wish my dad (and frankly mum) were as open as he were, just saying
    "hey what's your sexuality as far as you know?"
    It would really help a lot if parents were that open

  • @coffacuppee
    @coffacuppee 4 роки тому +6

    I don't know who you are but you're one fantastic father, as was my own. As an adult I later learned from older siblings that my father always knew I was gay but he was always my biggest supporter. He taught me to hunt and fish and play golf, probably to assure I had the best chance to be non-gay, but he loved me unconditionally. He did his best. I'm 65 now and like your son, as a teenager I also used to pray hard that God would let me "grow out" of being 'a queer' -- the common term back then. Now I thank God for who I am and what I've become. You are changing the world, thank you.

  • @zanyzoo6767
    @zanyzoo6767 4 роки тому +3

    Millions of people in the world gay or straight, would love a father like this. This is what parenting is. Any one can be a father or a mother but it takes insight , support and compassion to be a parent .

  • @joelr877
    @joelr877 4 роки тому +5

    It's important to create "safe spaces" to shelter your children from the world. If you pretend there aren't any bigoted people in society they will feel protected when they are under your umbrella. That way when they get into the real world and get slammed with a dose of reality, they can come back to you. You're kind, loving and caring, and the world is big, bad and scary. It's been a pretty effective parenting style for me.

  • @DanielNRollins
    @DanielNRollins 4 роки тому +164

    This video got me emotional. What a great example of being a good parent. I wish I had a father as accepting as Freddy.

    • @cindyjones6441
      @cindyjones6441 4 роки тому +2

      Daniel Rollins Fred is the sons name.

  • @m.antoniosims342
    @m.antoniosims342 4 роки тому +111

    What a beautiful man inside and out!! Thank God for fathers like him!!

  • @tamasamoa1931
    @tamasamoa1931 4 роки тому +130

    His unconditional love for his son and to get him to open up abt a topic so hard to talk about w kids is so amazing. We all wish we had a fathers love and support like this. U both are lucky to have each other. I wish your family all the best❤️

  • @curtisfranks1882
    @curtisfranks1882 2 роки тому +2

    This guy is what the best example of what real and loving father is. He made sure that his son never had to question his own worth and value as an individual is. Love does bring about love.

  • @Daris714
    @Daris714 4 роки тому +56

    What an AWESOME Dad and Human Being. If more parents were like you there would be a hell of a lot less Gay homelessness or suicides.

    • @davehowe54
      @davehowe54 3 роки тому +1

      FACT DARIS! Am a Gay Medic and can TELL YOU & others it just is, unfortunately, MORE than You Know. BOTH! Thx 4 speaking

    • @arnoldstafford4718
      @arnoldstafford4718 Рік тому

      After the father finds out he should try to join with son so they could really get close

  • @whoismikki
    @whoismikki 4 роки тому +41

    this is how every parent should be after their kid comes out

  • @FINEDIAMOND
    @FINEDIAMOND 4 роки тому +106

    You are a super dad. Amazing. Your children, especially your gay son, is blessed to have you for a father. It's also not hard to see why you haven't stayed single! 😉

  • @itsmeanthony9704
    @itsmeanthony9704 4 роки тому +20

    I’m gay and I never received a safe space, it made me stronger as a human being and it stiffened my resolve, that I as a gay man deserve to exist as everyone else does. I do wish to be equal in the eyes of our government, but I don’t care what anyone thinks of me.

    • @amandacogger3075
      @amandacogger3075 4 роки тому +5

      Good for you! Your fine the way you are

    • @itsmeanthony9704
      @itsmeanthony9704 4 роки тому +2

      Amanda Cogger well thank you dear. I really appreciate that.

    • @G3ForMe
      @G3ForMe 3 роки тому +1

      That is great for you, but there are a lot of people that kill themselves because they don’t have a safe space. Straight people have a built in safe space so why can’t gay people? What happens with gay people is that maybe they have to run away without any support, financially or emotionally- they then struggle with day to day life because they don’t have a foundation since they have to *react to what life throws at them instead of being *prepared by a loving family/safe circle.

  • @james2390
    @james2390 4 роки тому +46

    Father of the year every year.

    • @davehowe54
      @davehowe54 3 роки тому +2

      I second 2nd that James!

  • @ross_spirou_photography
    @ross_spirou_photography 4 роки тому +58

    Thank you so much for not only accepting of your son but for protecting him the way you did!!!!

  • @jaybirddee3790
    @jaybirddee3790 4 роки тому +4

    Unbelievable. Wonderful father. What a blessing for his son and the world.

  • @jimjimgl3
    @jimjimgl3 4 роки тому +2

    What a happier place we would have if more people were like this guy.

  • @peteravila83
    @peteravila83 4 роки тому +30

    Your son is blessed to have you as a dad.

    • @edsr164
      @edsr164 2 місяці тому

      Indeed I feel extremely envious of him

  • @ronibuli
    @ronibuli 4 роки тому +44

    Key word- loving, non judgmental person

  • @Dignity100
    @Dignity100 4 роки тому +8

    More parents should be like this.

  • @MultiMattman68
    @MultiMattman68 4 роки тому +6

    This dad deserves an award,bravo

  • @rocanlovr87
    @rocanlovr87 4 роки тому +36

    This is exactly how all parents should be. I love this so much

  • @8bitlatina845
    @8bitlatina845 4 роки тому +36

    I wish my parents were as accepting as this man.

  • @raymondkymsuttle
    @raymondkymsuttle 4 роки тому +17

    What a brilliant human being this man is.

  • @zigowl1193
    @zigowl1193 4 роки тому +50

    This is a great dad. Fred, you lucked out mate. 👍

  • @Kiwi_2001
    @Kiwi_2001 4 роки тому +3

    "loving, accepting & non-judgemental person" sounds like the way to be to me. Freddy epitomises a great father! All kudos to him.

  • @peterharris1751
    @peterharris1751 Рік тому +3

    You are a good father. Im proud that you're able to defend and love your son no matter what

  • @vaerldsmusik
    @vaerldsmusik 4 роки тому +8

    It is nice that a parent has been so loving and supportive. The world needs a few more such parents. Love is nice when it is there....

  • @Greggory1987
    @Greggory1987 4 роки тому +45

    Such a great dad and so authentically supportive.

  • @curtisfranks1882
    @curtisfranks1882 2 роки тому +1

    This man's kids are fortunate to have him as a father.

  • @Joe-xf7nr
    @Joe-xf7nr 4 роки тому +18

    what a great father.. Freddy must be so proud of you sir.. I wish i had that support during my teen years

  • @angelos.ortizvela7485
    @angelos.ortizvela7485 4 роки тому +65

    I teared up a little. This is so heartwarming. You’re such a good father.

  • @Zoom_1012
    @Zoom_1012 4 роки тому +9

    You are such an amazing father. Unfortunately when my parents found out I was gay at 15 they decided to send me to gay conversion therapy. It was horrible. But once they figured out I was who I was they eventually came around and accepted it. Fast forward many years my partner and I are celebrating our 20th anniversary together. I heard that's more than a lot of non-gay couples. My parents love him as one of their own and I couldn't be more happier.
    Thank you for being a fantastic father to your son Fred.
    🌴☀️🌴

    • @robertsherman9975
      @robertsherman9975 4 роки тому +2

      Paul M as a gay male myself.My heart goes out to you, for misery inflicted on you, in your early years. On the flip side, it’s heart warming to here that you are truly happy and blessed. The longevity of your relationship speaks volumes, of who the two of you are. ❤️

    • @davehowe54
      @davehowe54 3 роки тому +1

      YOU are a SURVIVOR Paul, many more Like You! and your Husband, good you stuck it out and made smart decisions to continue on.

  • @waltman333
    @waltman333 4 роки тому +24

    Fred, you are a great dad! If not for your intervention your son could have been forced into a conventional marriage to a woman by pressures of society. I wish your son the best in life and his future. Walt

  • @alexanderirizarry-camarill6277
    @alexanderirizarry-camarill6277 3 роки тому +1

    Now this is what a modern day father should be...supportive, loving and understanding. He knows when to listen and when to push forward.i hope his son knows how special his dad is? How uplifting this father is? Blessings all around. Alex

  • @MrPrinzbeat
    @MrPrinzbeat 4 роки тому +41

    From Switzerland - You are a great Father. Wishing you and your son and Family all the very best!

  • @melvinnixon2378
    @melvinnixon2378 4 роки тому +52

    I commend you sir for being a fabulous daddy. Bravo!!!!!

  • @MA-hs6gz
    @MA-hs6gz 4 роки тому +2

    What a cool dad. In this world any man can be a dad to someone but it takes a certain man with special qualities and traits to be someone’s FATHER.

  • @HungVu-vs3dv
    @HungVu-vs3dv 4 роки тому +8

    OMG I want a dad like him. He’s certainly a rare jewel

  • @edwardmiessner6502
    @edwardmiessner6502 4 роки тому +22

    What a great dad ❤

  • @benw9949
    @benw9949 4 роки тому +22

    If that guy is as caring as he sounds in this talk, dang, his son is lucky to have a dad like that. I'm impressed. I had a mostly good relationship with my parents, but the could also be controlling and had their own ideas on what was right. I never felt I could talk to them about being gay, from my preteens on into young adulthood when they passed away. And yet I loved them and they loved me. I was always scared it was conditional, that if they knew I was gay, they would not understand or accept me. I was more afraid of that than thinking would I get kicked out, because I didn't think they'd do that. So the dad, who's my age, accepting his son so much...dang, if he's really that good, his son is so fortunate. Why do so many of us have to go through our teens praying for God to make us straight, when we are not? Why do we have to go through so much, instead of being accepted and having good relationships, learning and dating and all, and the support of family and friends. Even kids like his son grow up like that, feeling bad for being gay, wanting to be made straight, when we are not. I wish it could be better for all of us. Even a kid who grows up supported, accepted, feels like that. Ouch, man. It should be better.

  • @noblelies
    @noblelies 4 роки тому +8

    What an awesome dad. If only everyone could have a father like this.

  • @pheenix1976
    @pheenix1976 4 роки тому +5

    Much kudos to this fine gentleman for being not only a fine example of what a good parent should be but also as a fine example of humanity. Although what we see in media these days is more the darker side of humanity, this brings me hope that the future of humanity might just yet have a fighting chance.

  • @jg6579
    @jg6579 4 роки тому +17

    I wish I would of had parents half as understanding as this father. That to me is a real man.

  • @davidbanas7609
    @davidbanas7609 4 роки тому +23

    Whether you realize it or not, You are F*cking Awesome. Yes, with just the simple ability to show your own Son unconditional Love. I did not get or receive that, They are gone now. When it is my time to cross over the line, they will have to answer me. I know they did the best they good, however, I matter too. I can choose to incarnate with another family, one more suitable. Right or wrong, this is how I feel. I doubt anyone has judged you for changing wives. I don;t see much of a difference,

  • @whyalfie
    @whyalfie 3 роки тому

    Man, what a lovely guy you are. A case where someone went through multiple divorces, not because they were insufferable themselves, but because they had respect for themselves AND their son. Beautiful. You got me crying my guy.

  • @rbtobi
    @rbtobi 4 роки тому +8

    this is how you do great parenting, albeit one-sided. what a great dad!

  • @sebastianboeddinghaus3505
    @sebastianboeddinghaus3505 4 роки тому +7

    I want to post this guy a "World's Best DAD" mug

  • @herilparis9508
    @herilparis9508 4 роки тому +1

    This is true definition of masculinity!

  • @Dan3043
    @Dan3043 4 роки тому +5

    I never get emotional. I'll go years without shedding so much as a tear, but I must have some lingering pain about the torment I was put through during my formative years and the turmoil that plagued me then, because I watch a video like this and within a minute or so I'm almost bawling and completely beside myself, feeling once again like that little hurt boy who was taunted and bullied by most everyone just because he was different. I don't know how to overcome that sort of baggage, I'm sure it takes a toll on my daily life. I've always been good at compartmentalizing and not showing my emotions, but when I am overcome by these feelings, I remember that I must be carrying some unresolved trauma, because they hit me like a tidal wave and I suffer a regression to my younger self.

  • @user-ws2lk8se4m
    @user-ws2lk8se4m 10 місяців тому +1

    Very proud to say that this is my father

  • @etude79
    @etude79 4 роки тому +2

    I lost my father when I was only 7, and to this day I wish I had a dad like you especially when I needed one the most

  • @DAVJULART
    @DAVJULART 2 роки тому

    I am absolutely blown away that you put your boy first.

  • @stevensordoni8450
    @stevensordoni8450 4 роки тому

    Your son knew he could come to you and you protected him. You're son will always know you're a great Father.

  • @travisgrant5608
    @travisgrant5608 4 роки тому +19

    Amazing father! We should all be so lucky.

  • @BDKla
    @BDKla 4 роки тому +6

    What a fantastic father. We need more men like you out there supporting their sons.

  • @ArefinSiddiquee
    @ArefinSiddiquee 4 роки тому +15

    He is a super Dad

  • @calumashleymcdonough8955
    @calumashleymcdonough8955 3 роки тому

    The son had the courage to share his sexuality with his father because the father had created a culture of acceptance. Way to go dad, you're an amazing person.

  • @lena-mariag.louis-charles3579
    @lena-mariag.louis-charles3579 2 роки тому

    This guy is a FATHER in the true sense of the word - my hat's off to You, Sir!🎩

  • @emmabarton98
    @emmabarton98 4 роки тому +3

    Such an amazing dad! Wish I had one like him.

  • @midnight840
    @midnight840 4 роки тому +9

    Strong loving parent , glad he found his own happiness

  • @andersb5007
    @andersb5007 4 роки тому +2

    Wow. You are the man! Three marriages and 5 kids? No kidding. Great dad and great man. And you look great!

  • @linleywatson8291
    @linleywatson8291 4 роки тому +17

    As a mother of a gay child you only want the same thing as you want for your straight child just to find true love and be truly happy

    • @samray397
      @samray397 3 роки тому

      Mom or Dad, u can't possibly know what makes yr child happy, boy or girl, unless u'r closer to them, like all the efforts this Nobleman made, talking more than listening...
      initially. Then, listening attentively...without probing unnecessarily! Positioning himself eventually! Brilliant! Are u willing to learn a thing or two through his experience? He's been so generous to share it. Accept it. Do not resist it defensively like his 1st wife!

  • @charliebrownsd
    @charliebrownsd 2 роки тому

    When a father knows it's just as important to provide a safe place for their son as their daughter. Boys and girls have feelings and need acceptance. The world would be a nicer place if more dads were like this man.

  • @breek.8678
    @breek.8678 2 роки тому

    Notice how throughout his entire story his primary concern was the well being of his son… he just wanted to be sure he son felt safe, supported and loved unconditionally. THATS a parent ladies and gentlemen!

  • @tedwilliams7021
    @tedwilliams7021 4 роки тому +5

    Wow!! Your son is lucky, you a re Super dad! Thank you for being an understanding Parent

  • @Moosedog9
    @Moosedog9 4 роки тому +11

    what an amazing dad. thank you ❤️👊🏻

  • @juandiaz7908
    @juandiaz7908 4 роки тому +1

    You are a great father! This is what parenting is all about.

  • @onlyget1
    @onlyget1 4 роки тому +8

    Excellent Dad!!

  • @aaronpsalms7335
    @aaronpsalms7335 4 роки тому +1

    Selfless and most Patriotic father !

  • @sjaelfre
    @sjaelfre 4 роки тому +3

    What a father

  • @manolingz
    @manolingz 4 роки тому +7

    You are a good dad, Sir.

  • @thegreatestguyEVA
    @thegreatestguyEVA 4 роки тому +1

    Wish my friends and family pushed this onto me. I’ve been withdrawn from my friends and family for years because I’m gay, but no matter how hard I try to be myself around them I just can’t. What a great dad

  • @TheDuglas63
    @TheDuglas63 4 роки тому +15

    THank you for sharing, you rock, Good Job Dad.

  • @iwnunn7999
    @iwnunn7999 4 роки тому +4

    Amazing father

  • @lacyrussell6688
    @lacyrussell6688 4 роки тому +1

    Unconditional love is all we need.

  • @ethanrogers6004
    @ethanrogers6004 4 роки тому +10

    Wish I had a dad like him.

  • @ryancaldwell9463
    @ryancaldwell9463 4 роки тому

    Wow. He’s probably the best father in the entire world.

  • @veenus93
    @veenus93 4 роки тому +2

    What a beautiful human being ❤️🙏🏻 If only all parents could be like this! It’s so very special when a child knows they are loved unconditionally, no matter what.

  • @happybergner9832
    @happybergner9832 2 роки тому

    The most difficult part is fear for our children's' safety.

  • @luigiperrone8169
    @luigiperrone8169 4 роки тому +2

    Indeed. It easy to make a child, the work is to raise the child. Good job.

  • @veramentestanco
    @veramentestanco 4 роки тому +9

    What a wonderful person and a star father to your son you are!
    I wish I had that kind of support and respect from my parents when I was growing up and coming to terms with my sexuality!
    Children need parents to guide and support them in their choices but too often parents end up projecting/forcing their dreams & expectations on their offspring without much care for their individuality!

  • @SardonicALLY
    @SardonicALLY 4 роки тому +2

    This is a man. This is a father.

  • @crsmith9988
    @crsmith9988 4 роки тому +1

    Topnotch dad... fathers all over have a lot to learn from this man.

  • @skiersobolski
    @skiersobolski 4 роки тому +1

    The best dad in the world. Bravo!

  • @billylopez3628
    @billylopez3628 4 роки тому +1

    You Sir are the type of neighbor, friend, father, son, and brother that should bless every family and community. High five! 🐻 hugs to you!!! And XOXOXO to your new forever wife! ✌

  • @katinagehn9337
    @katinagehn9337 4 роки тому +13

    You are such a good parent!! I wish you were my dad

  • @1533ramsay
    @1533ramsay 4 роки тому

    Fred is very blessed to have you as his father!

  • @dianajenkins6928
    @dianajenkins6928 4 роки тому +1

    Your son is a lucky young man to have you as his father. God Bless you both.

  • @Usselton
    @Usselton Рік тому +1

    Your a great dad your son is very lucky to have you

  • @JoseMatutina1964
    @JoseMatutina1964 4 роки тому +11

    Wonderful dad, and can I add that he's hot too.

  • @lynnetrathen4587
    @lynnetrathen4587 3 роки тому

    You are a wonderful dad. Fred is lucky to have you and your support.

  • @chaseconnery6538
    @chaseconnery6538 4 роки тому +6

    REally Good man and a really good Father. First and formost.

  • @mikesemailaccount3985
    @mikesemailaccount3985 4 роки тому +1

    What a great father!