КОМЕНТАРІ •

  • @the.seagull.35
    @the.seagull.35 11 років тому +85

    Steven wright is the only comedian that leaves me literally exhausted from laughing.

  • @markofthenorth9512
    @markofthenorth9512 4 роки тому +119

    The quantity of jokes is imsane. The pace is relentless. The delivery is ice cold.

    • @kellykeadle646
      @kellykeadle646 3 роки тому

      The

    • @trentonjurgensen7261
      @trentonjurgensen7261 2 роки тому +1

      A true legend

    • @tonicmix
      @tonicmix Рік тому +1

      I feel like this is what an advertisement for one of his shows would have said in 1991.

    • @iam01
      @iam01 Рік тому +1

      FACTS! Perfection

  • @mootpoint7053
    @mootpoint7053 4 роки тому +43

    Man this guys a one liner magician! Incredible

  • @alanmorris7669
    @alanmorris7669 3 роки тому +21

    Steven Wright is the master of dry humor.

  • @nobs4me2
    @nobs4me2 10 років тому +46

    Love this guy....his comedy is total genius!

  • @davidrose1838
    @davidrose1838 5 років тому +18

    Genius! Absolute genius. There's never been anyone like him with the intellectual one-liners and all!

    • @Stoney-Jacksman
      @Stoney-Jacksman 3 роки тому +3

      Im also amazed by how he memorised it all.

  • @jeromestracks108
    @jeromestracks108 4 роки тому +4

    I put my car key in the front door of my house. I turned the key and the building started up. So I drove it around for awhile. A cop pulled me over and said hey buddy where do you live? I said right here. LOL pure genius

  • @davidharrison6615
    @davidharrison6615 5 років тому +54

    "I can levitate birds , no one cares " !

  • @crackjuicer
    @crackjuicer 13 років тому +37

    My girlfriend was mad at me and said she was going to sleep, i put this on and as she was "sleeping" i heard her cracking up

  • @philipclayberg4928
    @philipclayberg4928 4 роки тому +4

    When I visited Transylvania, I drove cross-country. The vampires left me alone.

  • @robinannaniaz9670
    @robinannaniaz9670 8 років тому +107

    This is just "rapid fire" comedy.
    His acts so densely pact with jokes; other comedians would make 3 shows from one of his.

    • @thatotherkid9210
      @thatotherkid9210 8 років тому +1

      So what? That's his style of comedy, if you don't like it,

    • @thatotherkid9210
      @thatotherkid9210 8 років тому

      go check out a different comedian

    • @sheryllevine1548
      @sheryllevine1548 5 років тому +30

      People, her comment was a compliment.

    • @TV-Tony
      @TV-Tony 4 роки тому

      Hoo hoo Robin.

    • @jasondashney
      @jasondashney Рік тому

      It would be a whole career for Chris rock. Rock likes to repeat the same opening line over and over to each joke.

  • @andrewpestotnik5495
    @andrewpestotnik5495 10 років тому +55

    "When we crossed the border back into the United States, they ask me if I had any firearms. I said, what do you need?"

  • @josephtriplett7788
    @josephtriplett7788 5 років тому +13

    world record holder made more jokes than everyone put together

  • @likestoact
    @likestoact 13 років тому +11

    The one person that doesn't like this is the lady from Germany

  • @gilwood7530
    @gilwood7530 5 років тому +5

    great way to spend a Sunday morning

  • @hifijohn
    @hifijohn 2 роки тому +2

    I still have my cordless extension cord thanks to steven.

  • @alil6688
    @alil6688 4 роки тому +5

    Material that doesn't get old...

    • @samr.england613
      @samr.england613 3 роки тому

      Because he doesn't talk about politics or 'social justice' horseshit, current pop culture, etc.

  • @Gringoros
    @Gringoros 10 років тому +30

    don't watch this when you're eating. I almost choked to death a minute ago.

  • @FirenIce60
    @FirenIce60 5 років тому +38

    Comic genius, didn't need to swear to make you bust up laughing.

  • @HoscoFelix
    @HoscoFelix 12 років тому +6

    I love his surrealist stuff!

  • @Conspiracyknowledge
    @Conspiracyknowledge 13 років тому +13

    "we pleaded maybe" hahahaha

  • @pelicanbeater6100
    @pelicanbeater6100 5 років тому +17

    I once saw a wooden man that had an artificial appendage, it was a real leg.

  • @raymondcampanini6847
    @raymondcampanini6847 3 роки тому +2

    Did you have a good 👍 sleep…no I made a few mistakes…comedy GOLD Jerry! Haha 😆 Too much!

  • @locuus
    @locuus 14 років тому +3

    My favorite comedian! Thanks for uploading this.

  • @Bryanseas
    @Bryanseas 11 місяців тому +1

    Winni jokes omg😂😂 take our sweater off real quick i just imagine them two lmfao. Winnie was a procrastinator 😂😂then immediately talks about how winnie just does limbo all day😂😂😂 funniest shit ever man

  • @allenpoe17
    @allenpoe17 14 років тому +11

    I love it when comedians laugh at there own jokes

  • @OrgXIII4U
    @OrgXIII4U 14 років тому +2

    Yeah, super-thanks!!! Love Steven Wright's stand up!

  • @robbbyyy25
    @robbbyyy25 11 років тому +4

    If it wasnt for this guy most comics today wouldbt be where they are....this is Mitch hedberg with less energy, but Anthony jeselnik has this style downpacked...love this man

  • @mgabrysSF
    @mgabrysSF 3 роки тому +8

    Humor from an age when we didn't want to slit our wrists on a daily basis.

  • @oriolesandravens
    @oriolesandravens 8 років тому +8

    I love this guy

  • @RedNovaMedia
    @RedNovaMedia 6 років тому +74

    No swearing means genius. His jokes never get old

    • @NascarMicci
      @NascarMicci 4 роки тому +5

      @@JPEnjoi He said "thought".
      "I don't know who thought this up, but it certainly wasn't a bird."

    • @Stoney-Jacksman
      @Stoney-Jacksman 3 роки тому +2

      i dont swear..therefore I am genius.

    • @TraitorFelon.14.3
      @TraitorFelon.14.3 2 місяці тому

      Imswear. Obviously I know more words.

  • @supermantra3437
    @supermantra3437 4 роки тому +3

    Hillarious indeed b thanks

  • @IvoryOwl92
    @IvoryOwl92 11 років тому +3

    The "starting up the the building" part was awesome xD

  • @davidnewland2461
    @davidnewland2461 Рік тому +1

    He's one of a kind.

  • @andrewsarchivemusicmoviesh8246
    @andrewsarchivemusicmoviesh8246 10 років тому +12

    I can see where Mitch Hepberg got his gig. This is awesome.

    • @briseboy
      @briseboy 4 роки тому +1

      No you can't. listen to them both. Pretty far different, aren't they?
      Only similarities is that they are both deadpan one-liner comedians.
      Hedburg talks about what ifs? and imagination.
      Wright talks autobiography.

  • @darthvirgin7157
    @darthvirgin7157 2 роки тому +2

    he’s not good at improv. he doesn’t need to be.
    his writing and delivery are top notch, and one of the best.

  • @nowthatsjustducky
    @nowthatsjustducky Рік тому

    Years ago, in my last Air National Guard unit (combat comm...tactical networks, switchboards, satcom, wideband, etc) our work bay had a light switch that didn't seem to do anything. I naturally started with, "We're probably going to get a letter from a woman in Germany..." One gal finished with me, "saying cut it out."

  • @StudioMod
    @StudioMod 11 років тому +8

    "...as K-Billy's 'Super-Sounds of the 70's' keeps on.. truck-in'."

  • @bakedpsychopathtv5645
    @bakedpsychopathtv5645 4 роки тому +2

    King of One Liners

  • @RolodexEnigma
    @RolodexEnigma 3 роки тому +1

    I’m high as fuck right now and god damn is this insane there’s fucking inter dimensional jokes in this shit. He’s a scientific time sorcerer. That whistle he did was you hearing it forward and then hearing backwards. Absolute madness.

  • @PlatoonGoon
    @PlatoonGoon 2 роки тому

    The limbo under a rug joke was so good

  • @beerndumplings
    @beerndumplings 5 років тому +3

    Trying to drink soup while watching this. Very bad idea.

  • @Lord_Baphomet_
    @Lord_Baphomet_ 2 роки тому +3

    7:46 best joke by far holy crap I couldn’t stop laughing 😂

  • @evanbaldacci6265
    @evanbaldacci6265 10 років тому +10

    1. George Carlin. 2. Norm Macdonald. 3. Steven Wright. I'm just listing my favorite comedians in order.

    • @hapilydamaged
      @hapilydamaged 5 років тому

      Norm is still writing. I'm still a fan.

  • @danalaviano8579
    @danalaviano8579 4 місяці тому

    He is adorable

  • @MapleSyrupPoet
    @MapleSyrupPoet 3 роки тому +1

    I once stood in a rainstorm, and it told me to sit ...so I sat down, and the rain stood up ...so i moved a little bit sideways

  • @kystars
    @kystars 5 років тому +2

    He is really great. the one joke about I fill the bathtub up with water and turn the shower on and pretend i'm in a submarine that's been hit is so funny, because I actually used to do just that hahahah

  • @ninau1
    @ninau1 13 років тому +1

    The best of the best Cheers Steven!!!!

  • @stephenschmidt8440
    @stephenschmidt8440 11 років тому +3

    Yes, thanks so much....just hillarious.

  • @robertcabrera8228
    @robertcabrera8228 4 роки тому +4

    I one day I met Steve Wright, he asked me do I remember you, I said I forgot, where you thhre

  • @philipclayberg4928
    @philipclayberg4928 4 роки тому +2

    At my office, the front desk was too quiet, so I turned it around until the receptionist got better.

  • @rinshankouhai
    @rinshankouhai 11 років тому +4

    "Whenever I move this, glass breaks..."

  • @ericforman4721
    @ericforman4721 5 років тому +9

    Do you want some eggs?..... sorry.

  • @randonceccoli8428
    @randonceccoli8428 4 роки тому +2

    Bravo !

  • @narekarutyunyan9657
    @narekarutyunyan9657 5 років тому +2

    Thank you

  • @howardkoor2796
    @howardkoor2796 5 років тому +4

    Fred and Barney

  • @normal_media
    @normal_media 11 років тому +5

    Genius

  • @joanbrown2929
    @joanbrown2929 4 роки тому +3

    One of the best Thank you for being a clean comic

  • @t-royentertainment1421
    @t-royentertainment1421 2 роки тому

    Just Awesome wonderful !

  • @twiwonder
    @twiwonder 13 років тому +1

    Can't remember ever laughing this hard.

  • @thecanopy3630
    @thecanopy3630 2 роки тому

    Just found out about Steven a few months ago and after watching this I realize I had been telling a joke I wrote that is very similar to his, I will not be saying that joke in stage anymore 😅😅

  • @misterysylver
    @misterysylver 5 років тому +3

    any of these jokes would be great cartoons

  • @johnsalyers8309
    @johnsalyers8309 4 роки тому +1

    Where is he now simple but funny as hell he makes u think..

  • @AKayfabe
    @AKayfabe 10 років тому +29

    This guy and Carlin are just abt the only2 comics I love& respect. This kind of humor is genius& people who dont like or get it these days are brainwashed into thinking all comics must swear& scream& talk about sex all night. I totally CAN picture ppl being so stupid they don't get the jokes. Completely. And that makes me sad for the country today

    • @waylandporter1766
      @waylandporter1766 10 років тому +1

      Yes people are getting that stupid

    • @crashburn3292
      @crashburn3292 9 років тому +1

      A Kayfabe I just read a "Top Ten Funniest" list that actually went on into the 30's for some reason. This list had Daniel Tosh and Dane Cook in the top ten which did not include Steven Wright, Steve Martin, Mitch Hedberg, Louis C.K., Patton Oswalt, Bill Burr, Bill Hicks or ANY of the other great minds of comedy.
      Daniel Tosh and Dane Cook? - BTW, I think Norm McDonald is in the top five of all time underrated comedians ever. He may be #1. (His Carrot Top joke on Conan, "Chairman of the B-o-r-e-d' is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.)

    • @nowthatsjustducky
      @nowthatsjustducky Рік тому

      Steven Wright and Gallagher are the 2 I quote the most, I think.

  • @TheGreggiraldo
    @TheGreggiraldo 12 років тому +3

    1 dislike is from the lady from germany and the other 5 are from the babies prevented by the pill

  • @cevq6126
    @cevq6126 3 роки тому +2

    I spilled spot remover on my dog ... 🤪🤪🤪

  • @camcussion
    @camcussion 12 років тому +3

    I'm not surprised! it's a shame that some people will never understand these jokes :p

  • @_DB.COOPER
    @_DB.COOPER 2 роки тому +2

    Still funny.

  • @boneappletea3858
    @boneappletea3858 3 роки тому +1

    It's like watching cartoons.

  • @andrewwalsh6401
    @andrewwalsh6401 12 років тому +2

    One of a kind. Hilarious!

  • @feelsjeffman7787
    @feelsjeffman7787 Рік тому +1

    a germany woman writing a letter that just says “cut it out”

  • @JoyDivisiongirl
    @JoyDivisiongirl 12 років тому +3

    brilliant...just such odd observations...and the truth will always be funny.

  • @christianbenesch1
    @christianbenesch1 4 роки тому +4

    It’s funny how he tries to not laugh.

  • @freeinallthings
    @freeinallthings 4 роки тому +2

    Watched them backwards to mess up your stats on decay.

  • @NotIkeman
    @NotIkeman 13 років тому +4

    What's hilarious is I've heard that his dead-pan delivery isn't an act!

  • @maxonlife
    @maxonlife 5 років тому +4

    5:32

  • @Foxy-ve1oh
    @Foxy-ve1oh 4 роки тому +1

    Hi

  • @squatch545
    @squatch545 11 років тому +4

    9 babies who were prevented by the pill from being born didn't liked this.

  • @mitchqqqqqq
    @mitchqqqqqq 14 років тому +1

    best!!

  • @thoughtsurferzone5012
    @thoughtsurferzone5012 3 роки тому +1

    Henny Youngman meets Lewis Carroll.

  • @Grandizer8989
    @Grandizer8989 3 роки тому +1

    Cross Country skiing is easier in small countries

  • @howardkoor2796
    @howardkoor2796 5 років тому +1

    🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

  • @Ludifant
    @Ludifant 4 роки тому +1

    Hate to be a stickler, but shouldn´t that have been lactanthropoly?

  • @scotty
    @scotty 11 років тому +2

    nice avatar!

  • @meredithbarber4323
    @meredithbarber4323 Місяць тому

    That freaking voice!!!!!!! LMAO.... HOW are th r e only 140something comments??? Everyone else sucks

  • @LettyWhiterock
    @LettyWhiterock 12 років тому +1

    I am the milkman, my milk is delicious.

  • @INDEEDIBLY
    @INDEEDIBLY 13 років тому +1

    And the second is the bird wearing the sneakers.

  • @tvdinner325
    @tvdinner325 2 роки тому

    So clever.

  • @adam11mcc
    @adam11mcc 12 років тому +1

    best jokes eva!!!!!

  • @ieatgreenfleas
    @ieatgreenfleas 14 років тому +1

    hahaha 5:22 he is trying very hard not to laugh lol

  • @andrewpestotnik5495
    @andrewpestotnik5495 10 років тому +2

    1:57 Shots fired

    • @Foxy-ve1oh
      @Foxy-ve1oh 4 роки тому

      Do you want some eggs?

  • @KaitenKenbu
    @KaitenKenbu Рік тому

    Ha Salina is great.

  • @fredscott413
    @fredscott413 4 роки тому +1

    bofore his time.

  • @benmesias
    @benmesias 13 років тому +3

    I hate people who do howling noises at comedy shows...

  • @malcolmsmith6324
    @malcolmsmith6324 3 роки тому +1

    Steven was in a movie where he was hunting his psychiatrist. Any one know the name?

    • @nowthatsjustducky
      @nowthatsjustducky Рік тому

      Was that the one where he held up a jewelry store with a rubber band and paperclip?

  • @morpheusatloppers
    @morpheusatloppers 13 років тому +1

    @likestoact - LOL!!

  • @hunatae
    @hunatae 2 роки тому +1

    how does he never laugh?!?!

    • @barneymm2204
      @barneymm2204 2 роки тому

      He gets close sometimes.

    • @nowthatsjustducky
      @nowthatsjustducky Рік тому

      That little deep inhale he does as well as those sips at the water are the tells that he is fighting cracking himself up.

  • @djblur
    @djblur 3 роки тому +1

    7:24

  • @onestepbeyond7240
    @onestepbeyond7240 5 років тому +4

    .He thinks his friend is wierd cause he has false teeth with braces on them..
    Haha

  • @SteveWard151
    @SteveWard151 2 роки тому

    How can he do this. Say all these jokes with out laughing or smiling?