Regrets | Stuff We Don't Talk About | Keith Stewart | Springcreek Church
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- Опубліковано 9 лют 2025
- REGRETS
Stuff We Don’t Talk About (But Probably Should) - Part 2
Springcreek Church | Senior Pastor Keith Stewart
May 7, 2023
Regret is a heavy burden. It gets us mired down in things that are beyond our control. It fixates us on the past. It paralyzes us in the present and it leaves us unmotivated for the future. We end up stuck in a place we never wanted to be with no one to blame but ourselves. It doesn’t have to be that way. Discover the freedom that comes from releasing regrets.
SERIES: Stuff We Don't Talk About (But Probably Should)
People tend to hold in what they find upsetting, uncomfortable, or the things they fear. But our fear and avoidance of distressing topics actually magnify the distress and discomfort we’re feeling. There’s a better way. Honest, loving, and candid truth can dispel distortions, erase our fears and liberate us to face life’s most discomforting truths.
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DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. According to The World Regret Survey, there are four types of regrets;
• Foundation regrets - saving money, studying in school, the sort of things that prepare for the future.
• Boldness regrets - not speaking up, not taking the initiative, not attempting to do something.
• Connection regrets - relationships that got away, went south, weren’t treated with value
• Moral regrets - failures in kindness, breaches of integrity, lapses in loyalty.
As you feel comfortable, share with the group what sort of regrets you have had in one or several of the areas above. Why did that regret affect you so much? What do you wish you had done or hadn’t done? What’s your biggest learning that came from that experience?
2. In the first half of the message, Pastor Keith shared several ineffective but common ways of dealing with regret.
• We bury them
• We blame others
• We beat ourselves up
Of the three primary and ineffectual ways of dealing with regret, has there been a time or times when you tried to bury a regret, blame others for it or even beat yourself up? If so, how did that work for you? Why do you think you responded in that way? What advice would you give to others prone to burying resentment? Blaming others? Or beating themselves up?
3. Pastor Keith explained the process of grief and it looks like this…
The Process of Guilt
1. Violation of a standard
2. Feeling of guilt
3. A need for one of three things
a. punishment
b. forgiveness
c. repayment
4. Freedom from guilt
He explained if we don’t feel forgiven, then our problem comes in step three so we default to punishment or repayment. So we either go through life setting up scenarios in which we are punished Give some examples of this. Or repaying for our mistakes by trying to make up for them by being good. Give examples of this. In what ways have you struggled with feeling forgiven?
4. Think of the example of Alfred Nobel and how he decided (in light of his regrets to be a different person). He allowed his regrets to be his instructor, not his interrogator. In a similar vein, C.S. Lewis said, “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” Can you think of others who went through this process? Who were they and what in their life changed? For yourself, have you ever seen a regret turn into something instructional and redemptive in your own life? Describe that experience.
5. The problem so many have is believing and living as a forgiven person. Pastor Keith wrapped up this message by giving some examples and scriptures that assure us of our status as forgiven people. As a group, go back through the Scripture in the last point of the message. Discuss them and talk about which was your favorite and why. More importantly, discuss how your life is different or could be different moving forward by living like the promises of God are actually true. In other words, how does a forgiven person actually live?
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Such a powerful message love it
Preach pastor Keith!
Thanks, sir 🙏🏽