Joseph Dale it’s a play on the website only fans (amateur porn/nudes). He’s making fun of it by saying only friends. Idk if he made the shirt or bought it somewhere else tho
@@Shogun6155 oh no, thus guy actually thinks this is serious 🤣🤣🤣 I'm gonna need you to look up "satire". Feminists would have no problem with this unless they also didn't understand satire.
anybody else notice that the Cubs (2016) and Nats (2019) were named in both Houston (2017) and Boston (2018)’s investigations for also cheating? For 4 years in a row, the Dodgers have lost in the playoffs by the eventual WS winner (who has been accused, or found to be, cheating)
Brother I've been watching you since the good ole days!! You're still as hilarious as ever!! Glad you succeeded dude!!! Dom mazzetti vs drunk girls 4 life!!!
I was like fuck Imma be called simp by not only 14 year old trevor but lord dom mazetti aswell then he said the thing about the top and I was like I got 3 female tops in the last 30 days so my frale bodybuilder ego is now restored and I am finally at peace 😂😂
If you treat her like a celebrity, she’ll treat you like a fan.
-Socrates
Best one that I heard today, I will not forget
@yitzhak rafaeli shekkelsteinberg Your dad is a simp, and he created a mistake.
I don’t think Socrates actually said that...
-insert woooosh here-
@@SoulKingBK yeah it's actually from Nietzsche
Bro i can relate so f'ing hard
That’s it I’m changing my name
Trevor Wallace pull up Trevor!
Trevor always struck me a brofessor disciple
@@BroScienceLife 70th like
Twevoh wallwus
Simpology 101
this guy should definitely be a family therapist
top notch, no bs straight to the issues.
I'm not a simp, my wife's boyfriend said so
Hello Johnny
Why are you here Johnny Simp?
Ideal threesome - me, my girl and her man .
Lol
looool :))))))
For the act Dom puts on, his jokes and word play are actually top tier genius
Yes have u seen the shirt lol. Only simps on that platform
@@l.c3994 I don't think it's a coincidence that he's wearing that. Either that or he's got a sponsorship which would be ironic
Joseph Dale it’s a play on the website only fans (amateur porn/nudes). He’s making fun of it by saying only friends. Idk if he made the shirt or bought it somewhere else tho
@@taylorw9138 it's his shirt available at Dommerch.com
Joseph Dale it’s a sponsorship from his own company Dom merch pretty sure you can buy that shirt off his website
"Actually, 'Feel' and 'Responsible' are words used to oppress the Alpha Male."
Dead.
@Sans lamo
@@SS-iu1re lamo
@@matteusmaximofelisberto4385 lamo
As a 14 yr old named Trevor, I can confirm his accusations
Trevor Lemire lol
Wait so you been breast feed until 10
@@leovang3425 That would kind of suck man, I was more fortunate and kept getting breast fed till my 20s
As a 14 year old named Thomas, I can affirm his claims as well.
season 4 tmrw
“The only top your getting is desk top”
Bill Clinton has entered the chat*
Monica Lewinsky has left the chat
leave me out of this
@@THElidISon45 eyy, you still out there simping for Hillary, bro?
Hillary Clinton has left the chat
*The only dates i get are updates*
If she wants to be treated like a princess, *marry her off to France to strengthen the alliance*
U win the internet for today
*poland
*#Rule** 1678*
12 years a simp... never thought would hear that when I got out of bed today
Only Simps think about what they are going to hear today
@@Chris-tc1ln Only Simps say: "only simps say what ..."
@Mfurayimanzi Ndayisaba oh no. Did you catch my irony
Florian Holzmüller must suck to suck
Im a simp its amazing join da group
The only thing wrong with this video is the lack of gunshots
Hugo Katzer *gunshot at simps*
"Feminist, more like Feminazi, what's your favourite book Mein Simpf?"
I'm dead 😂
“Are willing to become a vegetarian to impress a girl?” I think we know the answer to that.
Nope
Simp
'yeah but I've been thinking about going vegan for a while anyway'
Pirate Skeleton never catch me with meat in my mouth 😤
He'll still be taking his protein tho. Anally.
"The cuck is the simp's final form." Poetry
Poe-a-tree
Poh Tree
How when and why is this a word
"FuckBoys Are OG Simps"
😂😂😂😂
So true lol
Never knew that 👍
Fr lol
😂😂😂
Also couples trapped in sexually frustrating marriages: why, are the original incels. Involuntary celibate. 😂
“ To launder her porn money.” A line I thought that I would never hear
Like all the women who married 'a man that can provide' and who smear actual honest ho's all the tine from their high horse.
Straight gold way to put most of the e-girl shit tho ngl ;'D
Sadboys 2001
This would be more clear if there was a picture of Bradley Martin under the word simp.
Next vid: "r u Bradley Martin?"
Brad literally runs a drug business so he can support his fav OnlyFans girls.
Me:*breathes*
Brosciencelife: "Sounds like a one-way ticket to Simpcity"
It's crazy how dom stays in 2012 and 2020 at the same time
Wait how?
Andrew mind blown
@@FalsifiedAccusations physically he's in 2020, mentally he's in 2012
Instructions were too confusing, now I'm a gay man stuck in a straight marriage addicted to crack and pre-workout.
You gotta read the fine print, fam
Hahahahahaha. You win the internet bro!
🤣✌
Woah vshred, new account?
@@dmonarredmonarre3076 ty ;) Idk why I never got notifactions for this comment, I expected like 3 likes
"And around the bend and back down the MissisSIMPi river" lmao perfection.
Alternate title:
Are you a Bradley Martin?
Or are you a BM for short
Boi King Simp 👑
Martyn
Only dislikes are from kids named Trevor
Zack Sullivan no shit
🖕🏼
It's 55 now lol
trevor casey 💀 dam Trevor
trevor casey I feel you bruh🤣
*S* - squirrels
*I* - in
*M* - my
*P* - pants
Shut Candice.
Phineas:yeah shut up Candice and GET ON THE TRIKE!
😂😂😂
Ok😂
*S* - shrek
*I* - is
*M* - my
*P* - president
@@TheStudiousDog its a song bruh
"All men are KINGS!"
"If he breathes, he's a SIMP!"
Man of culture i see
said no woman ever
Lord Sundae “Said every woman ever”-Every woman ever
*PIMPS
its the remix
Bradley Martin is the queen of simps
Marco 🤣
Marco lol missed these jokes these drug jokes are just dumb
He is a woman
That is sssoooooo good
Was looking for a comment like this lol
TBH, this guy either has professional writers or he's a genius.
he's a genius, just look at his older vids, oh shit.. i'ma be simpin for the dom
"Fuckboys are og simps."
Pure poetry
All that pimpin, you still simpin.
this one hurt
I fuckin felt that, hitting close to home.
That OG Simpson joke though 😂
He talking about models by mark Manson the fake alphas
imagine telling someone you respect your girlfriend then they ask “oh so you like to get pegged” lmaooo
DaEverything1 Pegging is legit hot tho
@@Bald_and_Brown simp
@@Bald_and_Brown wtf?
Jeramy Steve Don’t knock it till you try it man.
@@Bald_and_Brown simp
It amazes me how he's joking yet this is so accurate
I just got called a simp in 20 different ways in less than 9 minutes.
This is the content I subscribed for. keep it up Dom.
Saladman303 yeah! Me too😂
I can't see how 'I'm focusing on myself and don't want to be distracted by women' is even remotely a simp-like statement
@@Lucas_Jeffrey because it's pure cope?
“Because currently, youtube is pegging me”😂😂😂
sounds simpy to me
7:30 I spit out my drink laughing
"The people vs OJ SIMPson"
Killed me
He actually said "The People vs. O.G. Simpson"
Pfft... Typical simp
12 years a simp got me
OJ Simpson and OG Simpson are to different things OJ murdered somebody. The other prob didnt
So did OJ
The puns! The freaking puns!
The only winning move is not to ask.
Pisses me off how Dom accurately 100% describes me in every video.
Doms channel is the only channel on UA-cam without any hate comments
How can anyone hate this guy😂 maybe feminists but they know the retaliation they would get in the comments.
he’s been A1 since day 1 and that’s like 10 years ago now
@@Shogun6155 You do know its satire right.
@@w77eed yeah obviously
@@Shogun6155 oh no, thus guy actually thinks this is serious 🤣🤣🤣 I'm gonna need you to look up "satire". Feminists would have no problem with this unless they also didn't understand satire.
Quarantine must be getting to Dom, he’s almost as small as Bradley.
Jon G nah man qurrantine got to u. Your eyesight has deteriorate from all the time u spend on the internet
ZD X haha funy
ZD X No he just has bad eyesight cause he's a beta male with poor genetics.
We got some Bradley simps in this thread.
Doms comedy is so underrated. These videos takes some serious thought 💭
This channel formed my teenage years I’m glad to see it’s still alive
Simp ^
Simp
Simp
@@sweatysack4761 i was looking for that profile pic for years lul.
Oh btw *SIMP*
"If there was a World Series for cheating, I'd be the Houston Astros" Dom on the next level with this one
Mihir Chari pretty sure it’s just the World Series
Houston ASStros
more like houston masstros
anybody else notice that the Cubs (2016) and Nats (2019) were named in both Houston (2017) and Boston (2018)’s investigations for also cheating? For 4 years in a row, the Dodgers have lost in the playoffs by the eventual WS winner (who has been accused, or found to be, cheating)
That was a fkn BAR
🤣😂 man i really needed this laugh. Turns out everyone is a simp.
J.K Rowling decides who is gay, and Dom Mazzetti decides who is a simp.
This is the sequel to the “do you even lift?” flow chart
“Do you do Crossfit? Yes? Go straight to do you even lift”
which was also a sequel to the chart about jacking off
gotta love that no matter what river you take your canoe, all rivers lead to Simp
Sequel to the "Is lifting gay" flowchart
All the flowcharts are connected. Dom Cinematic Universe
Tony Kirumba “is lifting gay” was a Venn diagram, simpleton
I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. Thanks Dom
"Every Fuck boi was once a simp who got his heart broken years ago and is now trying to fuck away the pain."
I felt that..
Skimping i simp
I'm just here to hear how many ways Dom can fit "Simp" into a word. I was not disappointed.
Brother I've been watching you since the good ole days!! You're still as hilarious as ever!! Glad you succeeded dude!!! Dom mazzetti vs drunk girls 4 life!!!
"Only game you're playing is Simp City". I LOLed hard
"And the only top you're getting is desktop."
I don’t think people realize how challenging it is to make flow charts like this. Don is the goat
Just don't be a simp and it can be accomplished
Who is don?
@@lloydwright3661 Dom
SamN how would you know? have you tried before?
@@lloydwright3661 don dom
"4:14 what are you fukin morpheus looking for the one?"
DEAD
Was confused when the outro didnt repeat itsefl until the vid is hitting the 10 min mark.
He doesn’t get monetized anymore so it doesn’t matter
Luke Turner rip
@@luketurner9232 why
@@luketurner9232 why is that, it's been a while since I watched his stuff
@@danielcillie1856 maybe cos his content is not favorable to ad partners. Yt has been trying to keep it more PG lately
I was watching this with my friend Trevor lol.
Dont worry i disposed of the body correctly.
Guess what?
Now you’re the simp.
Steven O'Neill Simping over a dead body? Pathetic
This is not just ordinary presentation. This is spiritual experience that enlightening.
Dom explaining the devolution of the modern man in under 10 minutes
"man"
He has a video for people who pretend to be natty to bro
Damn lemme guess, stereotypical redpill 24/7 bitcher and complainer as a front for his inferiority complex?
You do understand that this whole channel is about mocking people like you yea?
Dude simped so hard he went “Ultra Simpstinct”.
DB.simp
Its actually SIMPle
We need to set up a simp confession rescue and rehabilitation centre in every neighborhood
😂😂😂
Poo
U need to stop schitting on the roads kumar
“Back down the Missisimpy River” 😂
I actually laughed out loud!
"Fuck Boys are OG simps, All that pimping you still simping"
Sounds like Drake
"DOES SHE KNOW YOU EXIST?" - Best question of century
I'm simping for this new upload schedule
Dom must've gambled himself into huge debt recently to bless us with these uploads.
The amount of clever puns is incredible.
Dom simping for that merch money
Ramon p shut up simp
Dom: describe your entire life in exact detail
Anyone: well I-
Dom: SIMP
this video single handedly makes me feel better about every decision i've ever made
“OG Simpson”. This guy is a comedic genius
MisSIMPy River
Can we get another “Ask the Brofessor”
Keegan S. Can I* and clearly you are a simp!
Luka Križanović 😂 nooooooooooo
he asked for questions on instagram a few weeks ago
Can we get another...
...video on the OG Dom Mazzetti channel ever?
I appreciate that flowchart. Very informative, and it also explains a lot of things about my personal life. Also, love the "OnlyFriends" shirt....
i'm a simp 100%. he caught me on "i'm just focusing on myself so i'm not running through hoes"
“The only game you’re playing is simp city” had me dead.
V shred should make an ad "what type of simp, are you?"
This is the man who’s going to save us
from what
@@cergy7625 from pink ass respectful fucked sarcasm. No comedy was always banged by sadness and violence
Father forgive me, for I have simped.
You opened my eyes to the truth. Subscribed.
Sorry gay bros even y’all ain’t safe from this epidemic
simpidemic
The real epidemic we facing
mysticstrider lol
Oh no
Epicdemic
"you simp so hard that it literally consumes you and you want to SIMPlify your life"
🤣🤣🤣
"aaand back down the MissiSSIMPy river" lmao
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Uuh..."
"SIMP!!!!"
The dislikes are from people named Trevor
GTA 5?
Trevor philips inc
Lmao 😂
And or kyles
“All that pimpin, you still simpin” 😂
"Get ya mind right beta, you a siiimp. And I'm a red hot undercover piiimp."
Pimp C, RIP.
Trill workin tha wheel, a pimp not a simp. Keep them dope feigns higher than the Goodyear Blimp
@@mandreadfg "We eat so many shrimp, I got iodine poisoning, f**k (racial slur I dont use) make me sick with all that pinching and bargaining."
"No she's not an e-girl so we're gonna assume she's a real life human"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 yo i haven't laughed this much from one video in awhile.
I couldn’t stop laughing 😂😂😂😂 this guy is to funny an his accent and constantly cursing
"Feel and responsible are words used to oppress the alpha male" 😭😭
He literally covered everything
He should have made shirt called only gains.
He has xD
"The only top you're getting - desk top" lol . fantastic!
I was like fuck Imma be called simp by not only 14 year old trevor but lord dom mazetti aswell then he said the thing about the top and I was like I got 3 female tops in the last 30 days so my frale bodybuilder ego is now restored and I am finally at peace 😂😂
We ain't gonna make it. Cue the theme from "Curb Your Enthusiasm"
Shut up dude and also can u give my channel a shout out
i asked my teacher if a character in this one story was a simp and she said “that’s not her last name” 💀
This is really high quality comedy, takes a lot of intelligence actually
It's pretty SIMPle
its alright, he tries hard tho
It does for an idiot like you
@@littleboy129 Hahah feisty! What comedians do you like, friend?
Jeffery Tinman go watch amy schumer, SIMP
As a german I lost it at "Mein Simpf"
My god.
ParadoxSoldier he’s so witty and intelligent it’s not even funny
"Missisimpy river" i stg this man always comes up with the best jokes
"Feel and responsible are words used to oppress the alpha male" Pure gold, keep up the great work Dom!
First vid I've seen from him, was not prepared to laugh that hard.
"But doesn't call it p0rn".
OOOF. That realness.
WHY AM I BEING TARGETED MANE. I didn’t do anything.
My girl cheated on me with a younger man, but I took matters into my own hands - OJ *SIMP* SON
All the paths leads to Simp
- Julius Caesar
"SIMPmund Freud" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 man i laughed so hard