I can agree with that. However, I can't stand people saying it's not a handicap. This results in many autistic people not getting the help they need, being denied critical services and ending up homeless, in jail or in psychiatric institutions. No, I do not consider ABA as any help.
Great video. I'm 31 and only realised I'm on the spectrum this year. I hand flap and rock back and forth when things get too loud but I am very intune with my environment. I've developed empathy that freaks people out, because it's a survival thing; I don't read faces - I read energy (yes this sound way out but it's true) - I sometimes hear what people think and I just feel the world around me. I'm a musician and artist and love science.
wow thank you for writing this, i feel very similar about my empathy and i also used to hand flap now i rock and i am glad i am not alone :) also i am a musician and artist who loves science too!
I’m 60, imagine being identified so late in life...relief yes but grief over so much lost time, trauma compounded it....due to misunderstandings from parents...friends what’s that?
My dad and I talked last night and it turns out that we both have recently come to the realization that both of us have many of the traits of autism. He is 71 and I am 37. I'm going to look into testing. Maybe I can get some tools for dealing with people rather than relying soley on my coping mechanisms.
Hi Alys. I feel your pain. I am fifty four and was diagnosed four years ago. I experience the grief over the life I could have led, the friendships I could have had. But I refuse to believe that it's too late. Pretty soon I am going to take steps to come out to the world as autistic. To me, it feels like a scab I have to rip off in order for any healing to take place. I have never been at ease with myself. I have never fitted in. Perhaps if I can find my true self after all these years I can find some peace? Perhaps?
"Just act normal and pretend you don't have autism, cos it's weird lol" -Neurotypicals, giving me advice. It's like people with Autism havdn't already been told that forever?
Yeah, I mean what IS normal anyway? To me, I'm always acting "normal". Everybody else acts irrationally to things that don't seem important. If being "normal" is getting upset about things that are only a construct of your collective society's imagination (like politics or money), then I don't want to be normal!!
Yes, I am 40 years old and if I could "act normal" without wanting to kill myself I would already be doing it. If I haven't figured it out by now, I am not going to. Get over it NTs!
@@sharonjensen3016 when were you diagnosed? I was diagnosed as a toddler (1980/1990) and I theorize that the shame around being autistic is more to do with the lack of support back then. I feel like there has been an explosion of autistic content creators and that only through hearing about autism by autistic people have I started my journey to embrace it.
As someone with Autism its really nice watching theses types of videos where someone has it and is doing well. It would be really nice for me to go and do talks like she is doing and going to schools to share my experiences in life and what daily living is for myself. Of course I have a lot to learn about myself but I feel this urge coming out that I want to speak up about it.
listen to your calling and honour your intuition. Explore this urge you're getting and try and find out what's fueling it. the world needs us to give it what we have to offer, but before that, we need to gain clarity of what it is that we have to offer, can offer and want to offer >:D
While i appreciate a whole lot about what the speaker said, one thing bothers me a lot... So... May i ask... What about things like the horrible meltdowns...does this speaker have them? Is she fine with having them? My 10 yr old son has them a lot...i don't think he or anyone will every be thankful for the horrible meltdowns. How can you act like that's great and like you don't want THAT to change? That's part of autism, isn't it? I do think autism certainly needs to be UNDERSTOOD more for the benefit of those who have it. It is a difference in the way the brain works...i don't think the brain is supposed to work that way. Certainly we should accept people who have this difference in their brain, but not act like it's all great any more than you would act that way about a person whose legs don't work so they can't walk. Ya a paralyzed person is as valuable of a person as any person and deserve all the love and respect anyone else does, but that doesn't mean we should go around saying that being paralyzed is great and acting like not walking is just another form of "normal". Autistic people are beautiful and precious, but autism isn't "normal" biology, in the sense that it isn't optimal "health"! It's a defect in the body, like paralization is. Am i wrong? What are y'alls thoughts?
Thank you so much. I tell my love, I love the differences between us. Sometimes it is a struggle but his Autism is part of him and part of what I admire in him.
@@hannahberkelouw3338 I love being Autistic even with my difficulties, as Elizabeth shared she realised her mind is blessed with gifts, I could recognise my gifts as well as traits. I would love it if the world could overcome it's fear of differences so all these gifts Autistic children and adults have can be accepted.
I'm 28 and I recently started to suspect that I'm neurodivergent. Watching this video.. I had to pause multiple times just to cry it out. I relate so much to her experience. All my pain and struggles, they come back to my mind - and now I know there is a reason. There is an explanation.
I just had the same experience. I'm also 28 and recently started to suspect I'm autistic. Here I am, crying due how related I feel to her personal story. I wish I could have people around me to talk about this things, but now she inspires me to find support and work in myself.
when you realize you have this "condition"- you realize that there isnt something "wrong" or "bad" with you but just different- and different in a very specific way, and that others out there share that specific difference. It provides you a LIFELINE with OTHERS.
Neuroscience is really just at its infancy. And it's not only going to radically change humanity, but show us what it really means to be a human. And these discoveries will dwarf anything that has come before them. Exciting times ahead.
Many thanks, Elizabeth. As an elder person exploring my place on the autism spectrum, self-expression has been my most important focus for many years. I appreciate your ability to tell your story. So very well done.
I'm a 59 year old male and discovered I am on the spectrum this month 1/2/18. What Elizabeth says on this video is so accurate and articulate. Knowing I'm on the spectrum has given me the tool to understand who I am and how I can understand my differences. It has been a life long struggle. Now, for the first time a fog has lifted that obscured understanding these struggles in almost every facet of my life. If you are not on the spectrum, it may not be fully possible to understand this or how it completely changes your life once you discover who you really are. Thank you Elizabeth Wiklander for stating this so well...
VincentRegios, I've researched Autism for over 20 years now, both inside the brain and how autistic people live a life in a world unsuitable for us. I look at it this way, due to my research I learnt there's so much those of us Autistic can do that non-autistic people will never be capable of because of the neurological differences. As she said her mind is blessed with gifts, all of our minds are. Autism gives advantages as well as disadvantages, just like neurotypical people have advantages as well as difficulties (traits), just there's fewer of us Autistic. This makes me view Autism as part of "The Human-Ability Spectrum", neurotypical people need our help and support as well. Everything that makes Autism labelled as "disability" can be reflected on neurotypical people. As an example, we're viewed as disabled because we find it difficult to understand nonautistic people, that can be reflected as nonautistic people are disabled because they find it difficult to understand autistic people. Everything reflects back on to them, the better way to view it is nonautistic people are "enabled", not "able", just about all the suffering autistic people experience is caused by; 1) NT's fear of what they don't understand. 2) NT's designing unsuitable environments. 3) NT's making a division creating an autistic vs nonautistic perception. Just about all suffering stems from how people learn to fear what they don't understand.
@@danielmoore4024 I love what you posted here. If I could give you a heart I would. This is my thinking entirely and I love the 'Human-Ability Spectrum', this is the way that I see the Spectrum. I see it as a circle of colours that are more intense in the centre and paler out to the edge, and that we're all on it, every single one of us, but we have different points plotted around the spectrum, so where I might be dark blue for something, someone else might be a paler blue and they might be a more intense yellow, I might be a pale yellow.
This is me! This is MY story too... I recently discovered ASD and ALL the pieces fell into place.. This is the first time in 59 years I feel real hope.. to find and be the real ME..
I went though the very same experience at a few months ago at 58! It feels so liberating! My emotions are like a title wave,such as grief,resentment for all the times I have been bullied, and a sigh of relief, all at the same time!
Hi, Tom. Was dxed last October at 54. I'd suspected as much for 5 years. Everything about my life made sudden sense, but I still think it sucks, and definitely explains why I have issues w religion.
gislertom I’m 56, and I was wondering at what age were you diagnosed? I’m starting to think I’m somewhere on that spectrum as well. Thank you for sharing with us.
@@juliadixon4810 I did not get a notification of your post. Its been over 2.5 years now since my diagnosis - It has not been an easy journey - but it has been a necessary one for me. I'm also ADHD/Dyslexic, likely CPTSD and so on... I'm finally facing everything I avoided or denied all my life. I just got out of a year of sort of giving up and letting go of everything. Now I'm rebuilding as a phoenix... I'm finally going the right direction and doing it as the REAL Tom with all my challenges and gifts. I hope this last year has been better for you. We're all so different, but we are all healing. Believing in a higher power or a life-force is not the same as religion. You've been shown a way to a better self. Follow that path with faith in yourself and your direction and you will find a better quality of life. You can contact me if you want to share more. I wish you peace and happiness.
Please take the time and listen to Ms. Elisabeth Wiklander as if you were blind, she has been misunderstood through her younger years due to her beauty and characteristics, showing a high percent of positive energy. Far beyond most individuals her intelligence is knowledgeable and prestige, ready to create the next best thing. Talent is known among these individuals of her standard and quality. I wish her the best in every aspect of life, with peace and happiness! God Bless.
Thank you...thank you...thank you. Your words on this topic are the best that I have heard. Like most Aspies, I suffered early & often for "being different". Unlike many, I have found my niche several times in life, being a creative problem solver, successfully solving technical & organizational change challenges. Much of my success has come to me from my "differences", & my belief that all problems are solvable. I have even received praise for solving "impossible problems" from clients & colleagues. You mention "outside the box" thinking, & that ability has been part of my success toolbox. At this point though, I firmly believe that "There is No Box".
Please write us a book on how you found this niche? Its taken me 55 years to find my second niche (mechanical engineering tutor) after having quite a sucessfull (but financially unsustainable) career as a sound engineer.
Shannon Kringen What kind pf different is autism a good or bad difference because if it was a good difference I suppose we wouldn't have to label the mind as autistic put rather have it be just part of an individual not a diagnosis.
Gosh why do you spend so much energy to write endless negative comments about autism here on UA-cam? Being autistic can be fricking annoying. But many autistics are happy with their life and don't want to change anything. It’s not you're place to judge about autism and autistics. Autism is not just bad, it has quite good sides too. And yes, Shannon is right, if there was less judgements and more acceptance autism would be much less of a problem.
the DSM just says in what parts we're diffrent, but not why, or if it's good or bad. And what do you think will judgment change? do you think it makes us less autistic? do you think my sensory issues would go away then? as long as there is no official cure it doesnt matter if it's good or bad, just to make life easier for autistics
At the end she does that little pause before saying thank you which is usually done in the end of classical music performances before the applause to enjoy the quietness after the musical experience.
Elisabeth, I started crying immediately when I heard you were a musician. I am an opera singer, finishing up my master's right now. Life in the classical world can be like a competition of who is the most neurotypical, if you will. I often feel I am held to a much higher standard of what it is to be a woman, professional, and just a human being in general. Your talk gave me a huge amount of relief, as I know I'm not alone. You give me so much hope.
When she talked about curiosity and support flooding in, it made me cry. I'm at that point (talking to everyone about it) right now, and it makes me so happy to think of the friends I have finally found, after two decades of solitude. I am accepted now, and finally learned to accept myself with my flaws.
I found this video shortly after I discovered I was autistic too and was later diagnosed to confirm this... It is still one of the best presentations I've seen in the last 15 months of learning about myself and autism. I come back from time to time because I reminds me of that time after discovery. The shock and wonder... am I really autistic? I could relate so strongly to what she said and still do. I will always be grateful for what you've done here Elizabeth… Thank you!
I love this. Too many times I've been hurt by what people say.. and I've learned to never get close to anyone because they will all eventually say;.. wow you are weird..and walk away
Autism is happening more often then we realize, parents often hide their child if they have Autism, its not right a child with Autism should be around people so the world can learn more bout their child who has Autism. I really encourage more people like speaker to speak up about theirresults on where to get help like she did.
I’m happier with a diagnosis, but I’ve found that when I tell people at work, they don’t believe I’m on the spectrum because they only see one type of autism. It doesn’t stop them from being annoyed by my antisocial behavior or inability to read social cues, or my problems with facial recognition. It does help though for me to know why I am the way I am and find peace with it.
Stringjamgirl, you put into words what for me is a hard-to-communicate problem: yes, people at work have been disbelieving that I have autism (with one even telling me--what you have, that's not autism) but then, yes, what I have difficulty with because of my autism seems hard to forgive. What may be worse, others seem surprised when I can't tolerate certain noises, as just one example, even though we've had the conversation multiple times...and the "anti-social" surprise you mention I've experienced as well. But I truly am hopeful that in three or five years people will be more open-minded and aware of what those who are neurodiverse are handling on a daily basis, and all will be more understanding of each other.
I've had the 'Why can't you be more normal?', the one I heard the other day was 'oh, you're good at Maths and Science then' and my favourite one was 'You don't look Autistic.' I've watched a lot of these video's on my journey through my Autism and they all say the same thing. We don't suffer with Autism, we suffer with societies perception of Autism. We all need to keep pushing and banging that drum and saying, yes we have difficulties, but so does everyone on this planet, but we are neurodiverse, not neurobroken and one day we will be accepted, it will just take time. I always liken it to Rock'n'Roll. In the 40's there was the big bands playing music that was safe and accepted by society, then all of the sudden the likes of Chuck Berry and Elvis Presley came along with this fast paced music, with their energetic stage presence and hip thrusting and society went 'Oh my God!', 20 years later, the Beatles, The Stones and The Who were doing the same thing, it was shocking society, Punk did it in the 70's, but now we look back on that music and it is accepted in society. If we keep pushing and making noise, then one day all forms of diversity will become the norm.
@@Song-Girl-Still-Singing As a retail manager no they should not we barely have time to get people to take courses on how to safely dispose of greese. Those teachings need to happen at home and we as managers have to be aware of all of it, and that is why I am trying to get into Human Relations which is becoming the most important field in management.
I 've always felt different and I've have struggled so hard to understand why until I found out , 8 months ago , at 45 years old , I had A.S ! It was a real shock ( because of the bad - and false- image of autism ) but also such a relief ! I have reread my life under this new understanding and after feeling angry ( for the huge amount of suffering that no one in my family ever took care of ) , and sad , I 've felt light , so light for the first time of my life . Struggle was over I could be my own self at last ! Knowing that I am an autistic person got me out of the disconfort zone I had been for ever . I 'm having a renaissance ! I live a life that-s good for me , when my kids are at school ( I don't have a job) I do what I want , I do my research , I read , I do yoga , meditation ( by the way great to help you to communicate and feel your needs). I feel strong ( aspies really are ) and proud of myself for my resilience . Elisabeth is a great and positive exemple of autism ! Aspies have a lot to give to the world ! My 3 kids have disorders ( one is aspie the 2 others have adhd ) and I create educational strategies to help them live a most happy life ! I have a FB page Severine Maman Hyper/Tsa . My project is to help people with disorders ( especially kids ) , I will be a coach in 1 or 2 years . Aspie people have so many gifts to give to the world !
This is just like my story. My life began in 31 years age, when i finally found my autism. How hard life felt before it. How happy and "blessed" i feel now. I'm gathering courage to out myself in my social media.
Cheryl Tyler, I'm glad I don't fit the social norm where I live. I've listened to and read so much produced by autistic people. After doing so I perceive that autistic people are just like the guardians of authenticity, I love having Asperger's because it gives me the strength and determination to stand alone when around unrighteous behaviour.
Beautiful story and such an important conclusion about the suffering in our lives not being a result of the autism but a result of the lack of understanding of it!!!
There is no normal, there never was in truth. Normal is different everywhere you go. There is only neurodiversity and thank you so much for this talk! This neurodiversity is the salvation of our world if we will just see it as such! We ARE the ones we've been waiting for! The greater the diversity that is put into solving a challenge... the greater the opportunity for amazing resolutions! If we could learn to speak in one voice what we truly want the end result to be, we could get there! I believe it's time to step out of survival mode and find our thrive throttle. I seek a world in which we are all accepted for our differences and appreciated for the diversity that we bring to the whole. I believe that world will only be created upon a foundation of love, acceptance, understanding, compassion, passion, peace, Joy and the knowledge that we are ALL connected. I'm not talking about a little all that leaves anything excluded. I am so deeply grateful for all the videos that are available that give me proof that we are changing. We are the power that will make the difference! Choice is how we use that power. It's time for love and acceptance to be the final words. I feel like this was a perfect description in so many ways of the life I have lived for well over half a century and a journey that has led me to understand that self-love is a gift you give to the world and it is the key to unlocking our capabilities. I believe autism offers us these beautiful, sweet glimpses of the superhuman capabilities that we have within us. The chaos we live in today is the perfect culture medium for growing new ways of being. Thank you so much for sharing with us you're amazing gifts and your beautiful way of being! You are such a perfect example of our way forward and I am deeply grateful for your courage in undertaking this journey... 🙏
Wow, what a great, inspiring speech. I agree with the speeker, we need to make the world a safe place to be our authentic selves for all on this planet.
Thank you for this. I decided to share it in my social media after reading much of what I’ve experienced but tried to understand by myself. There will always be polarizations in situations that stem from a lack of understanding and so enlightenment of self and others is the only good fight worth fighting. Ultimately your love must be bigger than your fears
In the 1980s I first read about autism and I can still feel the relief. I understood in my own bones this condition. In 1991 i was working as a live in housekeeper for a psychologist and I dared to tell her I was autistic. She rejected that instantly. “You are too bright to be autistic”. So I kept silent for another 20 years. I am now 85 and hearing all these talks is absolute heaven. What has kept me going is an experience I had at age eleven. My personal challenges combined with an alcoholic father, a bipolar mother, a dangerously mentally sister who regularly tried to kill me had worn me down. I began to say over and over “I want to die”. A Voice came into my being and said with total authority “say it once more and you’ve got it”. I totally believed what I heard. I received it as a great gift. I could die ANY TIME I WANTED TO. Other spiritual gifts kept me going over the years, but that one is still my joy. Yet it would be so wonderful to be understood. But all human beings feel that way, when you think about it. “Just say I tried to love somebody” said Dr. king. Yeah, that’ll do.
OH my......this was so amazing. "Every human being is a resource"....."should what is neurologically accepted be determined by the majority, should human value be determined by the majority" I'm 61 and have not found resources for my neuro-diversity. It's really wrong......so wrong. I'd like to reach out to Elisabeth Wiklander.....I struggle so much as a creative person. And my neuro-diversity issues affect my health.....even more at this point in my life. It's amazing how much of a struggle it can be to just get along in this world for some of us.
I can relate to most of what you’re saying. I’m 56 years old, and I’ve never been diagnosed. I think it’s time to get tested because of this video. Thank you for giving me a better understanding of myself, and for giving me hope! 💕😊
OMGS this is exactly how I felt when I was finally diagnosed at 44. At last it all made sense and understood so much. Amazing lecture, thank you for helping others inderstand us and our mind.
The brain amplifier analogy is so relatable. The slightest noise coming from a mile away could disturb my workflow and make it hard to become focused again.
I'm an aspie myself. I can relate very deeply to this. You are amazing Elizabeth. Thank you for being you. You inspire me as both an aspie and an aspiring musician. Oh yeah... and you are gorgeous. 😁😎🎶
This video makes me happy. I’ve been diagnosed with high functioning autism as well. I have weird traits that people seem to find weird like constantly touching my face & withdrawing myself from groups- even small groups. I was diagnosed a few years ago but I haven’t had the courage to tell my husband. I think he truly wants to know how to help me but I don’t have the description words to tell him how I feel.
well said! I also add one more thing we deserve. We deserve to be understood by our NT counterparts, especially on social media. There are some people who still don't do that... including those who have aspirations to be healthcare professionals. I almost want to say to these prospective health professionals, "If you don't make an effort to understand me, you not only are not listening to a professional peer. But, you are also not listening to those representing the neurodiverse community."
I ❤️ the message!!! Yes, the suffering is mostly from the lack of acceptance and understanding. Autism presents as extremes and I wish this was discussed more. Where this beautiful lady is gifted in memorization and organization making school and study a delight my children have extreme deficits in these areas due to autism processing challenges. The intellect is there, yet output function for school and the elementary tasks were/are often impossible. But meet them on their output function level and you will find the intellect is intact and demonstrable and can be tapped into to reveal gifts. Yet, access to this delve is rare. Autism. Extremes. Sometimes Simultaneously over sensitive in areas and and under sensitive in others. Extreme deficits and extreme gifts. If one only focuses on filling the gaps of the deficits or only the gifts, one might lose the end game of happiness. Without awareness (an answer and explanation) of the why things are different or challenging for the individual with Autism or other neuro diverse experiences it is such a tough journey. This identification of the why, embraced in a positive light of exploration can open new communication channels. There is always the risk though of the sharing of the why, that some relationships will become more healthy, some less. This extreme of “normal” people in the area of acceptance and rejection, validation and invalidation. Some will cheer and support your diversity, some will mock and call you a freak. So I guess extremes isn’t just Autism maybe but the human condition. “Normal” to the diverse person often present as the extremes of ignorance and an intolerance of different. She is very brave to step into the arena to educate a fearful and diverse humanity. Cheers to The Brave!
Incredible video and thank you for sharing your story. I accepted my psychological differences a while ago without fully understanding what they were but never have I heard someone verbalize my thought processes or related so much. Thank you and please continue to share your powerful story and beautiful message.
I want my teen son who is Neurodivergent to watch this. This explains so much for me, being his father and wanting to be a source of support for my son. I firmly believe that my son can thrive not just exist with his autism.
" David Bowie was a druggie since teenage years, he was so not Autistic " In that one sentence you have shown how little you understand about us. What's your problem, David J, do you hate yourself, and therefor us, or is it that you can't face up to the fact that the ' High functioning ' bit in the diagnosis actually means what it says, and that the psychologists have no problem with diagnosing someone both as Autistic and high functioning. ? Show me the Autistic traits ? I'm not going to watch the whole vid again to pick them out for you. Show them to yourself. Listen to the bit about how she felt she was given a different rulebook at birth than everyone else. I mean, you said it yourself, something about how she sounds as if she's dictating; that's a well known Autistic trait. Then respect her, as someone who has battled and won over the drawbacks we all face . . . . then realize that if she can, you can.
David J I earnt no money doing this ted talk. In fact I lost several hundred pounds as I had to take work off in the middle of a big European tour my orchestra did at the time, plus buy flight tickets to Gothenburg. And for the record, nothing about doing this ted talk was easy.
Great speech. Like Elisabeth, I had to look and research because what is perceived as autism didn't really fit. The reason for is that in the beginning it was believed only boys had autism. Girls kept falling through the net because they didn't display the same traits, also we tend to be better at masking. When I realized at the age of 57 the reason why my life had been as confusing as it had been, it was a lightbulb moment. I understood I was not broken, I was just different. I can honestly say, I cried for a while.
I just casually perused these 416 comments and am now going to add my own. At 49, I am only in my first full month of awareness (that I am autistic.) I echo the sentiments of many of the late-diagnosed adults that have already spoken up here. I am grateful for what I now know about myself. I am grateful for the active autistic online community. Every day that passes I feel more and more myself. A fog has lifted. It is liberating to pursue a life of authenticity and self-expression. I read somewhere that the Maori word for autism is "existing in their own space and time." I feel this way around the ducks and geese at the public golf course. I have started doing daily meditations at the edge of the lake. I am grateful for my autistic journey, and am taking every opportunity to spread awareness, with a newfound resolve to love and accept myself.
At 39… turning 40 in October will be my very first birthday, knowing I’m on the Spectrum. I’m beyond thrilled to have this entire new outlook and compassion on not just myself, but so many others I’ve known.
Please please please!!! Subtitles in many languages!!! This is by far the best tedx talk I’ve watched on autism, we need to be able to share it with the world!!!
So happy for you. Unfortunately, your experience is incredibly rare. Many of us do not have the same response that you received when we disclose. For a lot of us, we get a response that is almost opposite from yours. But I am so happy for you that it went well. Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's such a beautiful story. ❤
This video made me realize I'm autistic after living on this earth for 28 years, unaware why I was different. It's been 2 years since, thank you for starting me on this journey of self-rediscovery.
There is a ted with girl who was diagnosed at 35. Helped me understand the spectrum, low and high functioning etc. Im definitely neurodifferent and while no amateur like me cam confirm i also feel im surrounded by people on spectrum a lot
Thanks so much for your talk. I am 74 and just diagnosed with autism which was a HUGE relief. I also have hyperacusis which makes things more difficult, but, life goes on and God is good. We live in a very noisy world and stores are not in favor of shutting down the music in their establishment. I do wear Bose sound canceling earphones and custom made ear plugs, but I need a year o sleep. I am my husband's full-time caregiver, so going anywhere for a while is not available. He is very good and understanding which is a blessing. Health care after COVID has been not good...so thanks again.
I love these, but... I'd love for someone to give a talk about WHAT they did to bring themselves back from the fringes of society. What the day by day, the first step was and the 15th... Because for someone like me who at 37 only found out 2 weeks ago he was Adhd, and 5 days ago that he's on the spectrum the mountain of enlightenment is desirable but, where does one start rebuilding a ship lost at sea with no port which to dock?
~Keep watching videos, reading books, join online forums, facebook groups.. now you DO have ports and harbours.. I just got diagnosed last year (aged 48) & it takes a bit of time to digest and to find your new "tribe" .. keep reaching out too.. we all can help each other :))
Hey it's early days for you, give yourself a break this is going to take time it's a process. Everything in this feed is good advice. I'll share my story with you. I'm just getting my head round the fact that I'm on the Spectrum also. And what do I feel? I feel relief! I'm 61 and have always felt different on so many levels to neurotypicals/ordinary people. My life has had all the challenges most women on the spectrum struggle with. Life has been hard. The things that support my identity are my interests ....... the natural world, environmentalism, the study and working with and for 'natural processes' of healing the Earth, friendship, activism, psychology, shamanism, love of animals and wanting to make a difference in the word are the foundations of my life not family and parenting too complex for me or gossip, shopping, and accquiring. Before my recent realization that I am on the spectrum (I am in the process of being diagnosed) I had come to terms with the fact I was not typical that I was an 'Outlander' and that was OK in fact to be honest I'm quite proud of it. When I look round normal does not seem very alluring! . And that's OK and to be honest I don't wish to be like most people..... I do not like the label Autism Spectrum Disorder this is not a Disorder this is a differrentness. I prefer Autistic Spectrum Variants. So lets be honest no one is going to cure us though we can learn to adapt and understand to a degree always knowing we are different. But knowing why I am different is sich a relief it's not because of something I'm doing wrong eg to much sugar, lack of self discipline, not enough sleep, lack of meditation etc., Finding ones interest and work? Look to what you enjoyed in your mid teens and return to those. Why not join a group for late diagnosed adults or set one up yourself? I'm thinking of doing this. I wish to meet more people like me. Give yourself a break and take your time. Also a good routine, eight hours sleep, exercise, healthy lifestyle, cutting down drugs and alchohol, strategies to cope with the overwelm, these all support wellbeing obviously the opposite detracts. I like to be alone and not lonely. Time on my own is calming and healing for me. Managing my work and taking breaks through the day a bit like a Microsoft employee! I enjoy people but prefer the company of men as they are simpler to understand!!!... Living with someone even a life partner does not work for me, I need my own space when I try to live with someone it never works for me it's best that I keep my own home etc., though I guess if we had a large large house and he could have the west wing and I could have the east wing then that might work! One day at a time and remember that brain scans actually shows our brains develop differently and faster, we are different but there are substantial numbers of us and society is begining to acknowledge us. Friendship? People in general are always most comfortable with those who are most like them and share similar experiences. Go find them and I wish you a good life and I hope my sharing has been of help? Alas there is no 'How to' book but perhaps you could keep a diary and maybe share your journey someday? Enjoy. H
@@velvetindigonight Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I'm just 4 months into my journey of learning how I am, after 40+ years of living a mystery. I like what you wrote. I hope you've been able to meet other Aspies - I joined a local social group and found it enlightening to be around others with different behaviours but this common understanding. Best wishes to you.
To OP, its been a year since you posted, can you share any steps you found to be helpful? I am finding the same, that actual advice / things to do seems very vague and just the same things over and over.
My first reaction when I hear autism / autistic is "i'm definitely no" then I go ahead and struggle and unravel with living through what it looks like being one. THANK YOU for this. I got help but always learning of other people's experiences helps. Before getting help my philosophy was always 'ignore all emotions; it's ok you're a weirdo'. Nowadays I embrace not being like others, and strive to understand my and others' emotions as much as I can
Neurodiversity is not the opposite or a challenge to seeing autism as a disability. I am autistic, I am disabled, I believe in the ethos of Neurodiversity. People who say autism isn't a disability don't understand disability. It's not just that autism itself can be disabling, but that an inaccessible society disables us too. And honestly I've never heard someone say autism isn't a disability without sounding like they think disability is a terrible thing and disabled people are to be pitied.
Surely it needn't be a disability, and we should adapt access to education and work to ensure it is not a disablement? Not all disabilities are visible is a favourite shirt logo in respect of ASC, but each of us views disability differently.
Philip tattsbridge If we have to adapt access then it is a disability. The condition itself is only part of what makes someone disabled, an inaccessible society disables them to a much greater degree. And even in a fully accessible society, my neurodivergent brain is a disability.
Jill Rattray Adapting is not a "disability", it's how society evolves to accept people's differences and diversity. Like how society adapts to different races and cultures. That's completely normal. Real disabilities are if a person cannot function at all regardless.
It makes life harder cause world is prepared for neurtypicals A high functioning Autist (so above 70iq and talking) who have cope mechanism for whatever happens on own spectrum would have a better life than a lot of average people who also need to cope with own difficulties, not talking about adhd like me and famous cases of autism+adhd which is usually one big life chaos..
Awesome Ted talk Elisabeth! One of the main things I got from watching is that those of us on the spectrum should embrace our different brains and enjoy the way we process the world! We should also make an effort to conform to behavioral standards so we don’t appear too weird. I feel motivated, perhaps by those pants!
Very insightful talk, we do still have a long way to go in Africa. Just realised I'm on the spectrum at 31, so much misunderstandings around have took place and need to learn again how to act and talk socially
Thank you Elisabeth! Brilliant! Diversity is beautiful and human rights essential. Of all the many videos on this topic I've watched, on UA-cam and in professional settings, not one portrayed a person with brown skin. We understand how much representation matters and that everyone's voice should be heard. Please join in ensuring that as we speak out for our own interests, we advocate for diversity for all rainbows and spectra.
I'm also a woman diangosed with Aspergers. It not easy what we go thru, Even now I'm still trying to get myself indepent at 37 years old. Being that we are very high functioning that can also be a disadvantage too because other people don't bother that we have some type of disabilty.
Preach! I'm 31 trying to do the same. The annoying thing is that being quite good at hiding my awkwardness and effort it takes to act 'normal' leads people to believe it's not an issue anymore.
hi, i am 28 and currently going through the correct avenues to find out if i have been suffering in silence, so far a lot of stuff i have read i can resonate with and i am hoping this will finally help me move on in my life, sadly, i have lost a lot of love from my family as they would rather my behaviour is from taking drugs for years to mask my own emotions which are hyper sensitive .. i have learned to appear normal for years except i have never been able to change my situation, i have great deals of anxiety and depression that surrounds most social interaction... i wish everyone all the best in finding you truth
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I often feel like I have been missing the day they passed the social skills out. It explains so much about what I go through quite often! I would really like to get a autism diagnoses to confirm that I really have it.
I wish all this was my case now. My family still refuses to aknowledge my diagnose at 44 (I fell through the cracks in the 70s), even though I am a texbook presentation. I'm invalidated and so are my challenges, I'm invisible to most people here in my country. I have no relationship, still raising a daughter alone divorced. In my country I have no hope to remarrying is now clear to me being how I am. The only positive things of now knowing I am autistic are I at least now understand myself, being autistic has enabled me to have an amazing job because of how I process information and have found a nice online community but other than that I am alone. A year ago when I was diagnosed I posted here that this is how I felt too and I wanted all to go like it did for her, guess it was just wishful thinking. I will keep writing about the experience and hoping at least someone will benefit from my experiences.
This is very relatable. I'm 36 and realizing so much that I wasn't alone all this time. I never spoke up bc of how alone I truly thought I was on top of what she described. I feel like my life is just beginning for the first time. It's beginning with trauma therapy, but that's ok bc it's never too late! Thank you for this, thank you so much for this. I struggle so hard to articulate this now bc of longterm medical trauma. This is not just helpful for me but I think for others trying to understand the neurodiverse people in their lives. 🥰
What an awesome talk! And yes, I'm also different. The biggest obstacle is societal ignorance, as they don't like "different'. I never felt part of "normal" society.
Thank you for sharing your experience, feelings, and knowledge. I applaud your work toward self awareness and personal growth. I find that I share some of your traits, and suspect that they just fill in another part of the "spectrum." Once I understood them, it became easier to successfully integrate them into my lifestyle. Let us embrace our neurodivdersity along with our humanity. You might enjoy reading The Speed of Dark by Elisabeth Moon.
What I need in my journey towards a diagnosis is context. I've always felt like I wasn't given the guide book to socializing and being human, and I grew up feeling like a total alien, even though I didn't ever express that. I'm 22 and on my way to an assessment and it's a long, painful journey so far.
"If we need a cure for anything, it's not for autism. It's for ignorance and intolerance." Brilliantly put. Thank you for this.
Right!? She did great, I was disappointed no one was screaming and hollering when she said that. Lol
I can agree with that. However, I can't stand people saying it's not a handicap. This results in many autistic people not getting the help they need, being denied critical services and ending up homeless, in jail or in psychiatric institutions. No, I do not consider ABA as any help.
Precisely
deep kanner's autism is horrible and crippling
What if you are low functioning without a support system?
"I could change the way I acted, but I cannot change the way I am."
Something I've been feeling for years. It's wonderful to know I'm not alone.
must be wonderful to be who we are and be accepted even liked by others
@@steve-os5oc It is. I hope you get to experience it soon.
Great video. I'm 31 and only realised I'm on the spectrum this year. I hand flap and rock back and forth when things get too loud but I am very intune with my environment. I've developed empathy that freaks people out, because it's a survival thing; I don't read faces - I read energy (yes this sound way out but it's true) - I sometimes hear what people think and I just feel the world around me. I'm a musician and artist and love science.
wow thank you for writing this, i feel very similar about my empathy and i also used to hand flap now i rock and i am glad i am not alone :) also i am a musician and artist who loves science too!
We would have loooooong lovely conversations and not feeling any struggle to connect and comprehend...
Totally resonating.
@@jessicaferrari3987 empathy, energy... I feel you.
I hear u girlfriend 🙌
I feel its ruined my life! Im learning now tho and i will make it one day
I read energy as well not people, it works for me.
I’m 60, imagine being identified so late in life...relief yes but grief over so much lost time, trauma compounded it....due to misunderstandings from parents...friends what’s that?
I was 54 and no one I know has ever heard about it till I told them.
same 64yrs old - just 'realised due to reading about it due to my Grandaughter's label
My dad and I talked last night and it turns out that we both have recently come to the realization that both of us have many of the traits of autism. He is 71 and I am 37. I'm going to look into testing. Maybe I can get some tools for dealing with people rather than relying soley on my coping mechanisms.
I was 64.
Hi Alys. I feel your pain. I am fifty four and was diagnosed four years ago. I experience the grief over the life I could have led, the friendships I could have had. But I refuse to believe that it's too late. Pretty soon I am going to take steps to come out to the world as autistic. To me, it feels like a scab I have to rip off in order for any healing to take place. I have never been at ease with myself. I have never fitted in. Perhaps if I can find my true self after all these years I can find some peace? Perhaps?
"Just act normal and pretend you don't have autism, cos it's weird lol" -Neurotypicals, giving me advice. It's like people with Autism havdn't already been told that forever?
Yeah, I mean what IS normal anyway? To me, I'm always acting "normal". Everybody else acts irrationally to things that don't seem important. If being "normal" is getting upset about things that are only a construct of your collective society's imagination (like politics or money), then I don't want to be normal!!
This.
This is the age of Autism. This is the turning point where we embrace our selves and our community and be true to ourselves as autistic people.
Society: Just act yourself
Also society: no not like that!
Yes, I am 40 years old and if I could "act normal" without wanting to kill myself I would already be doing it. If I haven't figured it out by now, I am not going to. Get over it NTs!
Absolutely brilliant, I myself being diagnosed only last year at age 64. I see the autism as a gift ☺️
So do I 💖
A gift? I wish. I just see it as something I have to live with. No other choice.
@@sharonjensen3016 thats such a shame you see it that way, 2 years on from my diagnosis and I am happy to learn more and more about my true self.
@@sharonjensen3016 when were you diagnosed? I was diagnosed as a toddler (1980/1990) and I theorize that the shame around being autistic is more to do with the lack of support back then. I feel like there has been an explosion of autistic content creators and that only through hearing about autism by autistic people have I started my journey to embrace it.
As someone with Autism its really nice watching theses types of videos where someone has it and is doing well. It would be really nice for me to go and do talks like she is doing and going to schools to share my experiences in life and what daily living is for myself. Of course I have a lot to learn about myself but I feel this urge coming out that I want to speak up about it.
listen to your calling and honour your intuition. Explore this urge you're getting and try and find out what's fueling it. the world needs us to give it what we have to offer, but before that, we need to gain clarity of what it is that we have to offer, can offer and want to offer >:D
Same
THERAPY. She is there because she did her job.
While i appreciate a whole lot about what the speaker said, one thing bothers me a lot... So... May i ask... What about things like the horrible meltdowns...does this speaker have them? Is she fine with having them? My 10 yr old son has them a lot...i don't think he or anyone will every be thankful for the horrible meltdowns. How can you act like that's great and like you don't want THAT to change? That's part of autism, isn't it? I do think autism certainly needs to be UNDERSTOOD more for the benefit of those who have it. It is a difference in the way the brain works...i don't think the brain is supposed to work that way. Certainly we should accept people who have this difference in their brain, but not act like it's all great any more than you would act that way about a person whose legs don't work so they can't walk. Ya a paralyzed person is as valuable of a person as any person and deserve all the love and respect anyone else does, but that doesn't mean we should go around saying that being paralyzed is great and acting like not walking is just another form of "normal". Autistic people are beautiful and precious, but autism isn't "normal" biology, in the sense that it isn't optimal "health"! It's a defect in the body, like paralization is. Am i wrong? What are y'alls thoughts?
Start on social media, tiktok
I have recently had an official diagnosis, I really needed to hear this story. Thank you for sharing.
Research the cognitive functions. Research "Extroverted feeling," and "Fe 7th" / "Fe PoLR."
Study the cognitive stack:
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Thank you so much. I tell my love, I love the differences between us. Sometimes it is a struggle but his Autism is part of him and part of what I admire in him.
@@hannahberkelouw3338
I love being Autistic even with my difficulties, as Elizabeth shared she realised her mind is blessed with gifts, I could recognise my gifts as well as traits.
I would love it if the world could overcome it's fear of differences so all these gifts Autistic children and adults have can be accepted.
I'm 28 and I recently started to suspect that I'm neurodivergent.
Watching this video.. I had to pause multiple times just to cry it out. I relate so much to her experience. All my pain and struggles, they come back to my mind - and now I know there is a reason. There is an explanation.
Me too. Go do it
Me too … 😢 a lot of crying here
I just had the same experience. I'm also 28 and recently started to suspect I'm autistic. Here I am, crying due how related I feel to her personal story. I wish I could have people around me to talk about this things, but now she inspires me to find support and work in myself.
💓
when you realize you have this "condition"- you realize that there isnt something "wrong" or "bad" with you but just different- and different in a very specific way, and that others out there share that specific difference. It provides you a LIFELINE with OTHERS.
Neuroscience is really just at its infancy. And it's not only going to radically change humanity, but show us what it really means to be a human. And these discoveries will dwarf anything that has come before them. Exciting times ahead.
Many thanks, Elizabeth. As an elder person exploring my place on the autism spectrum, self-expression has been my most important focus for many years. I appreciate your ability to tell your story. So very well done.
"I'm good at out of the box thinking, because I'm often not even aware there is a box."
I forgot who said this
I'm a 59 year old male and discovered I am on the spectrum this month 1/2/18. What Elizabeth says on this video is so accurate and articulate. Knowing I'm on the spectrum has given me the tool to understand who I am and how I can understand my differences. It has been a life long struggle. Now, for the first time a fog has lifted that obscured understanding these struggles in almost every facet of my life. If you are not on the spectrum, it may not be fully possible to understand this or how it completely changes your life once you discover who you really are. Thank you Elizabeth Wiklander for stating this so well...
@@ferminromerodetorres 59 isnt the "last stage. Dx gives you strength.
"I'm still autistic, but I love it" Wish I could say the same. And I'm hoping the day will come when I can feel like that.
VincentRegios,
I've researched Autism for over 20 years now, both inside the brain and how autistic people live a life in a world unsuitable for us.
I look at it this way, due to my research I learnt there's so much those of us Autistic can do that non-autistic people will never be capable of because of the neurological differences.
As she said her mind is blessed with gifts, all of our minds are. Autism gives advantages as well as disadvantages, just like neurotypical people have advantages as well as difficulties (traits), just there's fewer of us Autistic.
This makes me view Autism as part of "The Human-Ability Spectrum", neurotypical people need our help and support as well. Everything that makes Autism labelled as "disability" can be reflected on neurotypical people.
As an example, we're viewed as disabled because we find it difficult to understand nonautistic people, that can be reflected as nonautistic people are disabled because they find it difficult to understand autistic people.
Everything reflects back on to them, the better way to view it is nonautistic people are "enabled", not "able", just about all the suffering autistic people experience is caused by;
1) NT's fear of what they don't understand.
2) NT's designing unsuitable environments.
3) NT's making a division creating an autistic vs nonautistic perception.
Just about all suffering stems from how people learn to fear what they don't understand.
@@danielmoore4024 I love what you posted here. If I could give you a heart I would. This is my thinking entirely and I love the 'Human-Ability Spectrum', this is the way that I see the Spectrum. I see it as a circle of colours that are more intense in the centre and paler out to the edge, and that we're all on it, every single one of us, but we have different points plotted around the spectrum, so where I might be dark blue for something, someone else might be a paler blue and they might be a more intense yellow, I might be a pale yellow.
This is me! This is MY story too... I recently discovered ASD and ALL the pieces fell into place.. This is the first time in 59 years I feel real hope.. to find and be the real ME..
I went though the very same experience at a few months ago at 58! It feels so liberating! My emotions are like a title wave,such as grief,resentment for all the times I have been bullied, and a sigh of relief, all at the same time!
Hi, Tom. Was dxed last October at 54. I'd suspected as much for 5 years. Everything about my life made sudden sense, but I still think it sucks, and definitely explains why I have issues w religion.
@@juliadixon4810 hi Julia, what does it have to do with religion? I've been suspecting I have aspergers but will get diagnosed soon.
gislertom I’m 56, and I was wondering at what age were you diagnosed? I’m starting to think I’m somewhere on that spectrum as well. Thank you for sharing with us.
@@juliadixon4810 I did not get a notification of your post. Its been over 2.5 years now since my diagnosis - It has not been an easy journey - but it has been a necessary one for me. I'm also ADHD/Dyslexic, likely CPTSD and so on... I'm finally facing everything I avoided or denied all my life. I just got out of a year of sort of giving up and letting go of everything. Now I'm rebuilding as a phoenix... I'm finally going the right direction and doing it as the REAL Tom with all my challenges and gifts. I hope this last year has been better for you. We're all so different, but we are all healing. Believing in a higher power or a life-force is not the same as religion. You've been shown a way to a better self. Follow that path with faith in yourself and your direction and you will find a better quality of life. You can contact me if you want to share more. I wish you peace and happiness.
Please take the time and listen to Ms. Elisabeth Wiklander as if you were blind, she has been misunderstood through her younger years due to her beauty and characteristics, showing a high percent of positive energy. Far beyond most individuals her intelligence is knowledgeable and prestige, ready to create the next best thing. Talent is known among these individuals of her standard and quality. I wish her the best in every aspect of life, with peace and happiness! God Bless.
Thank you...thank you...thank you. Your words on this topic are the best that I have heard.
Like most Aspies, I suffered early & often for "being different". Unlike many, I have found my niche several times in life, being a creative problem solver, successfully solving technical & organizational change challenges. Much of my success has come to me from my "differences", & my belief that all problems are solvable. I have even received praise for solving "impossible problems" from clients & colleagues. You mention "outside the box" thinking, & that ability has been part of my success toolbox. At this point though, I firmly believe that "There is No Box".
Please write us a book on how you found this niche? Its taken me 55 years to find my second niche (mechanical engineering tutor) after having quite a sucessfull (but financially unsustainable) career as a sound engineer.
Bob Carlston yesyesyes!!!!!! great words!!!!!
Amazing, yes, please write a book! 🙏
This is one of the best speeches from an aspie on the stereotypes of autism. Brilliant!!!
we need to cure judgements yes. not autism but people judging each other for being different.
Shannon Kringen What kind pf different is autism a good or bad difference because if it was a good difference I suppose we wouldn't have to label the mind as autistic put rather have it be just part of an individual not a diagnosis.
Gosh why do you spend so much energy to write endless negative comments about autism here on UA-cam? Being autistic can be fricking annoying. But many autistics are happy with their life and don't want to change anything.
It’s not you're place to judge about autism and autistics. Autism is not just bad, it has quite good sides too. And yes, Shannon is right, if there was less judgements and more acceptance autism would be much less of a problem.
Shannon Kringen Good luck with that, princess of lala land.
perliva Autism is all bad it is an affliction read the DSM.
the DSM just says in what parts we're diffrent, but not why, or if it's good or bad.
And what do you think will judgment change? do you think it makes us less autistic? do you think my sensory issues would go away then? as long as there is no official cure it doesnt matter if it's good or bad, just to make life easier for autistics
At the end she does that little pause before saying thank you which is usually done in the end of classical music performances before the applause to enjoy the quietness after the musical experience.
"Why must we wear a one size fits all just because it fits most people" the way she put everything I feel but can't express into words, just amazing.
The silence is definating to me, yet shows how many of us feel this.
Elisabeth, I started crying immediately when I heard you were a musician. I am an opera singer, finishing up my master's right now.
Life in the classical world can be like a competition of who is the most neurotypical, if you will. I often feel I am held to a much higher standard of what it is to be a woman, professional, and just a human being in general. Your talk gave me a huge amount of relief, as I know I'm not alone. You give me so much hope.
Life is a competition of who is most neurotypical.
When she talked about curiosity and support flooding in, it made me cry.
I'm at that point (talking to everyone about it) right now, and it makes me so happy to think of the friends I have finally found, after two decades of solitude.
I am accepted now, and finally learned to accept myself with my flaws.
I found this video shortly after I discovered I was autistic too and was later diagnosed to confirm this... It is still one of the best presentations I've seen in the last 15 months of learning about myself and autism. I come back from time to time because I reminds me of that time after discovery. The shock and wonder... am I really autistic? I could relate so strongly to what she said and still do. I will always be grateful for what you've done here Elizabeth… Thank you!
I love this. Too many times I've been hurt by what people say.. and I've learned to never get close to anyone because they will all eventually say;.. wow you are weird..and walk away
I am beyond lucky and blessed to have a family that has always been supportive of my weird
Autism is happening more often then we realize, parents often hide their child if they have Autism, its not right a child with Autism should be around people so the world can learn more bout their child who has Autism. I really encourage more people like speaker to speak up about theirresults on where to get help like she did.
I’m happier with a diagnosis, but I’ve found that when I tell people at work, they don’t believe I’m on the spectrum because they only see one type of autism. It doesn’t stop them from being annoyed by my antisocial behavior or inability to read social cues, or my problems with facial recognition. It does help though for me to know why I am the way I am and find peace with it.
Stringjamgirl, you put into words what for me is a hard-to-communicate problem: yes, people at work have been disbelieving that I have autism (with one even telling me--what you have, that's not autism) but then, yes, what I have difficulty with because of my autism seems hard to forgive. What may be worse, others seem surprised when I can't tolerate certain noises, as just one example, even though we've had the conversation multiple times...and the "anti-social" surprise you mention I've experienced as well. But I truly am hopeful that in three or five years people will be more open-minded and aware of what those who are neurodiverse are handling on a daily basis, and all will be more understanding of each other.
I've had the 'Why can't you be more normal?', the one I heard the other day was 'oh, you're good at Maths and Science then' and my favourite one was 'You don't look Autistic.'
I've watched a lot of these video's on my journey through my Autism and they all say the same thing. We don't suffer with Autism, we suffer with societies perception of Autism.
We all need to keep pushing and banging that drum and saying, yes we have difficulties, but so does everyone on this planet, but we are neurodiverse, not neurobroken and one day we will be accepted, it will just take time.
I always liken it to Rock'n'Roll. In the 40's there was the big bands playing music that was safe and accepted by society, then all of the sudden the likes of Chuck Berry and Elvis Presley came along with this fast paced music, with their energetic stage presence and hip thrusting and society went 'Oh my God!', 20 years later, the Beatles, The Stones and The Who were doing the same thing, it was shocking society, Punk did it in the 70's, but now we look back on that music and it is accepted in society.
If we keep pushing and making noise, then one day all forms of diversity will become the norm.
People in the work place should be required to take a course about neurodiversity and how to be inclusive, understanding, and kind.
@@Song-Girl-Still-Singing As a retail manager no they should not we barely have time to get people to take courses on how to safely dispose of greese. Those teachings need to happen at home and we as managers have to be aware of all of it, and that is why I am trying to get into Human Relations which is becoming the most important field in management.
@@Byronic19134 That's your opinion. My job says otherwise.
I 've always felt different and I've have struggled so hard to understand why until I found out , 8 months ago , at 45 years old , I had A.S ! It was a real shock ( because of the bad - and false- image of autism ) but also such a relief ! I have reread my life under this new understanding and after feeling angry ( for the huge amount of suffering that no one in my family ever took care of ) , and sad , I 've felt light , so light for the first time of my life . Struggle was over I could be my own self at last ! Knowing that I am an autistic person got me out of the disconfort zone I had been for ever . I 'm having a renaissance ! I live a life that-s good for me , when my kids are at school ( I don't have a job) I do what I want , I do my research , I read , I do yoga , meditation ( by the way great to help you to communicate and feel your needs). I feel strong ( aspies really are ) and proud of myself for my resilience . Elisabeth is a great and positive exemple of autism ! Aspies have a lot to give to the world ! My 3 kids have disorders ( one is aspie the 2 others have adhd ) and I create educational strategies to help them live a most happy life ! I have a FB page Severine Maman Hyper/Tsa . My project is to help people with disorders ( especially kids ) , I will be a coach in 1 or 2 years . Aspie people have so many gifts to give to the world !
This is just like my story. My life began in 31 years age, when i finally found my autism. How hard life felt before it. How happy and "blessed" i feel now. I'm gathering courage to out myself in my social media.
You rock, see it is a secret talent 😏
It's funny how the little thing she mentions, like emotions coming and going so quickly, can make me cry in an instant 😭
“My whole life and my experiences started to make sense” -
I’m 36 and only this year diagnosed with Aspergers, and this is exactly how it felt!
Your courage to call out social “norms” is admirable. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, ideas and your unique story.
Cheryl Tyler,
I'm glad I don't fit the social norm where I live.
I've listened to and read so much produced by autistic people. After doing so I perceive that autistic people are just like the guardians of authenticity, I love having Asperger's because it gives me the strength and determination to stand alone when around unrighteous behaviour.
Beautiful story and such an important conclusion about the suffering in our lives not being a result of the autism but a result of the lack of understanding of it!!!
How elegantly put...we need more people like this lady to take the platform and lead us forward into a kinder more fruitful and rewarding world
There is no normal, there never was in truth. Normal is different everywhere you go. There is only neurodiversity and thank you so much for this talk! This neurodiversity is the salvation of our world if we will just see it as such! We ARE the ones we've been waiting for! The greater the diversity that is put into solving a challenge... the greater the opportunity for amazing resolutions! If we could learn to speak in one voice what we truly want the end result to be, we could get there! I believe it's time to step out of survival mode and find our thrive throttle. I seek a world in which we are all accepted for our differences and appreciated for the diversity that we bring to the whole. I believe that world will only be created upon a foundation of love, acceptance, understanding, compassion, passion, peace, Joy and the knowledge that we are ALL connected. I'm not talking about a little all that leaves anything excluded. I am so deeply grateful for all the videos that are available that give me proof that we are changing. We are the power that will make the difference! Choice is how we use that power. It's time for love and acceptance to be the final words. I feel like this was a perfect description in so many ways of the life I have lived for well over half a century and a journey that has led me to understand that self-love is a gift you give to the world and it is the key to unlocking our capabilities. I believe autism offers us these beautiful, sweet glimpses of the superhuman capabilities that we have within us. The chaos we live in today is the perfect culture medium for growing new ways of being. Thank you so much for sharing with us you're amazing gifts and your beautiful way of being! You are such a perfect example of our way forward and I am deeply grateful for your courage in undertaking this journey... 🙏
"I can change the way I act, but I can't change who I am"
Wow, what a great, inspiring speech.
I agree with the speeker, we need to make the world a safe place to be our authentic selves for all on this planet.
Thank you Elisabeth...you are making a wonderful difference...yes, ignorance is the word for the world to overcome!
"a cure for ignorance and intolerance" I loved it! Thank you for sharing
Thank you for this.
I decided to share it in my social media after reading much of what I’ve experienced but tried to understand by myself.
There will always be polarizations in situations that stem from a lack of understanding and so enlightenment of self and others is the only good fight worth fighting.
Ultimately your love must be bigger than your fears
In the 1980s I first read about autism and I can still feel the relief. I understood in my own bones this condition. In 1991 i was working as a live in housekeeper for a psychologist and I dared to tell her I was autistic. She rejected that instantly. “You are too bright to be autistic”. So I kept silent for another 20 years. I am now 85 and hearing all these talks is absolute heaven. What has kept me going is an experience I had at age eleven. My personal challenges combined with an alcoholic father, a bipolar mother, a dangerously mentally sister who regularly tried to kill me had worn me down. I began to say over and over “I want to die”. A Voice came into my being and said with total authority “say it once more and you’ve got it”. I totally believed what I heard. I received it as a great gift. I could die ANY TIME I WANTED TO. Other spiritual gifts kept me going over the years, but that one is still my joy. Yet it would be so wonderful to be understood. But all human beings feel that way, when you think about it. “Just say I tried to love somebody” said Dr. king. Yeah, that’ll do.
OH my......this was so amazing. "Every human being is a resource"....."should what is neurologically accepted be determined by the majority, should human value be determined by the majority" I'm 61 and have not found resources for my neuro-diversity. It's really wrong......so wrong. I'd like to reach out to Elisabeth Wiklander.....I struggle so much as a creative person. And my neuro-diversity issues affect my health.....even more at this point in my life. It's amazing how much of a struggle it can be to just get along in this world for some of us.
I can relate to most of what you’re saying. I’m 56 years old, and I’ve never been diagnosed. I think it’s time to get tested because of this video. Thank you for giving me a better understanding of myself, and for giving me hope! 💕😊
OMGS this is exactly how I felt when I was finally diagnosed at 44. At last it all made sense and understood so much. Amazing lecture, thank you for helping others inderstand us and our mind.
The brain amplifier analogy is so relatable. The slightest noise coming from a mile away could disturb my workflow and make it hard to become focused again.
I'm an aspie myself. I can relate very deeply to this. You are amazing Elizabeth. Thank you for being you. You inspire me as both an aspie and an aspiring musician.
Oh yeah... and you are gorgeous. 😁😎🎶
This video makes me happy. I’ve been diagnosed with high functioning autism as well. I have weird traits that people seem to find weird like constantly touching my face & withdrawing myself from groups- even small groups. I was diagnosed a few years ago but I haven’t had the courage to tell my husband. I think he truly wants to know how to help me but I don’t have the description words to tell him how I feel.
oh gosh, well said. Such a quiet audience I was cheering and clapping her on at home :')
so brave sharing experiences.
well said! I also add one more thing we deserve. We deserve to be understood by our NT counterparts, especially on social media. There are some people who still don't do that... including those who have aspirations to be healthcare professionals. I almost want to say to these prospective health professionals, "If you don't make an effort to understand me, you not only are not listening to a professional peer. But, you are also not listening to those representing the neurodiverse community."
I ❤️ the message!!! Yes, the suffering is mostly from the lack of acceptance and understanding. Autism presents as extremes and I wish this was discussed more. Where this beautiful lady is gifted in memorization and organization making school and study a delight my children have extreme deficits in these areas due to autism processing challenges.
The intellect is there, yet output function for school and the elementary tasks were/are often impossible. But meet them on their output function level and you will find the intellect is intact and demonstrable and can be tapped into to reveal gifts. Yet, access to this delve is rare.
Autism. Extremes. Sometimes Simultaneously over sensitive in areas and and under sensitive in others. Extreme deficits and extreme gifts. If one only focuses on filling the gaps of the deficits or only the gifts, one might lose the end game of happiness.
Without awareness (an answer and explanation) of the why things are different or challenging for the individual with Autism or other neuro diverse experiences it is such a tough journey. This identification of the why, embraced in a positive light of exploration can open new communication channels. There is always the risk though of the sharing of the why, that some relationships will become more healthy, some less.
This extreme of “normal” people in the area of acceptance and rejection, validation and invalidation. Some will cheer and support your diversity, some will mock and call you a freak. So I guess extremes isn’t just Autism maybe but the human condition.
“Normal” to the diverse person often present as the extremes of ignorance and an intolerance of different. She is very brave to step into the arena to educate a fearful and diverse humanity. Cheers to The Brave!
Incredible video and thank you for sharing your story. I accepted my psychological differences a while ago without fully understanding what they were but never have I heard someone verbalize my thought processes or related so much. Thank you and please continue to share your powerful story and beautiful message.
I want my teen son who is Neurodivergent to watch this. This explains so much for me, being his father and wanting to be a source of support for my son. I firmly believe that my son can thrive not just exist with his autism.
Thank you for talking openly.
I was and still am bullied by some people and i was call mad, thank you Elisabeth for sharing your testimony.
This woman should be our Prime Minister....I want to live in her society.
I think she is brilliant. Very clear.
I'm Autistic. She is. David Bowie was. We are not all mute and antisocial. Have a nice day.
" David Bowie was a druggie since teenage years, he was so not Autistic " In that one sentence you have shown how little you understand about us. What's your problem, David J, do you hate yourself, and therefor us, or is it that you can't face up to the fact that the ' High functioning ' bit in the diagnosis actually means what it says, and that the psychologists have no problem with diagnosing someone both as Autistic and high functioning. ? Show me the Autistic traits ? I'm not going to watch the whole vid again to pick them out for you. Show them to yourself. Listen to the bit about how she felt she was given a different rulebook at birth than everyone else. I mean, you said it yourself, something about how she sounds as if she's dictating; that's a well known Autistic trait. Then respect her, as someone who has battled and won over the drawbacks we all face . . . . then realize that if she can, you can.
Boys and men also mask their Autism ..be it undiagnosed or diagnosed, same problems exist for males as well as females. Stop being so feminist!
She earns quite enough in world famous orchestras I presume. People don't earn much from TEDx talks. So not really easy money.
David J I earnt no money doing this ted talk. In fact I lost several hundred pounds as I had to take work off in the middle of a big European tour my orchestra did at the time, plus buy flight tickets to Gothenburg. And for the record, nothing about doing this ted talk was easy.
Love this!!!! I also just want to mention though too, Disability isn't a bad word
Great speech. Like Elisabeth, I had to look and research because what is perceived as autism didn't really fit. The reason for is that in the beginning it was believed only boys had autism. Girls kept falling through the net because they didn't display the same traits, also we tend to be better at masking. When I realized at the age of 57 the reason why my life had been as confusing as it had been, it was a lightbulb moment. I understood I was not broken, I was just different. I can honestly say, I cried for a while.
i appreciate the mix of old and new terms. i lessens the negativity i feel hearing them
Gratidão. Thank you. I found myself autistic a month ago. what you said touched my soul. Gratitude.
I just casually perused these 416 comments and am now going to add my own. At 49, I am only in my first full month of awareness (that I am autistic.) I echo the sentiments of many of the late-diagnosed adults that have already spoken up here. I am grateful for what I now know about myself. I am grateful for the active autistic online community. Every day that passes I feel more and more myself. A fog has lifted. It is liberating to pursue a life of authenticity and self-expression. I read somewhere that the Maori word for autism is "existing in their own space and time." I feel this way around the ducks and geese at the public golf course. I have started doing daily meditations at the edge of the lake. I am grateful for my autistic journey, and am taking every opportunity to spread awareness, with a newfound resolve to love and accept myself.
Me too, at 74.
I related to this very deeply.
lol
At 39… turning 40 in October will be my very first birthday, knowing I’m on the Spectrum. I’m beyond thrilled to have this entire new outlook and compassion on not just myself, but so many others I’ve known.
Please please please!!! Subtitles in many languages!!! This is by far the best tedx talk I’ve watched on autism, we need to be able to share it with the world!!!
So happy for you. Unfortunately, your experience is incredibly rare. Many of us do not have the same response that you received when we disclose. For a lot of us, we get a response that is almost opposite from yours. But I am so happy for you that it went well. Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's such a beautiful story. ❤
wow. This just changed my life. thank you.
This video made me realize I'm autistic after living on this earth for 28 years, unaware why I was different. It's been 2 years since, thank you for starting me on this journey of self-rediscovery.
Wonderful, intelligent speech. It is nice to hear someone have a voice for those of us on the spectrum.
Thank you for your courage in helping society embrace differences. Understanding is the beginning of change.
There is a ted with girl who was diagnosed at 35. Helped me understand the spectrum, low and high functioning etc. Im definitely neurodifferent and while no amateur like me cam confirm i also feel im surrounded by people on spectrum a lot
Thanks so much for your talk. I am 74 and just diagnosed with autism which was a HUGE relief. I also have hyperacusis which makes things more difficult, but, life goes on and God is good. We live in a very noisy world and stores are not in favor of shutting down the music in their establishment. I do wear Bose sound canceling earphones and custom made ear plugs, but I need a year o sleep. I am my husband's full-time caregiver, so going anywhere for a while is not available. He is very good and understanding which is a blessing. Health care after COVID has been not good...so thanks again.
I’m diagnosed as an autism at age around 40 and this exactly entails my story! Thank you for sharing this!!
Second time I have looked at your video. Your experience and my own correlate. This video has been emotional. Thanks
I love these, but... I'd love for someone to give a talk about WHAT they did to bring themselves back from the fringes of society. What the day by day, the first step was and the 15th... Because for someone like me who at 37 only found out 2 weeks ago he was Adhd, and 5 days ago that he's on the spectrum the mountain of enlightenment is desirable but, where does one start rebuilding a ship lost at sea with no port which to dock?
~Keep watching videos, reading books, join online forums, facebook groups.. now you DO have ports and harbours.. I just got diagnosed last year (aged 48) & it takes a bit of time to digest and to find your new "tribe" .. keep reaching out too.. we all can help each other :))
46 here. same boat.
Hey it's early days for you, give yourself a break this is going to take time it's a process. Everything in this feed is good advice. I'll share my story with you. I'm just getting my head round the fact that I'm on the Spectrum also. And what do I feel? I feel relief!
I'm 61 and have always felt different on so many levels to neurotypicals/ordinary people. My life has had all the challenges most women on the spectrum struggle with. Life has been hard.
The things that support my identity are my interests ....... the natural world, environmentalism, the study and working with and for 'natural processes' of healing the Earth, friendship, activism, psychology, shamanism, love of animals and wanting to make a difference in the word are the foundations of my life not family and parenting too complex for me or gossip, shopping, and accquiring. Before my recent realization that I am on the spectrum (I am in the process of being diagnosed) I had come to terms with the fact I was not typical that I was an 'Outlander' and that was OK in fact to be honest I'm quite proud of it. When I look round normal does not seem very alluring! . And that's OK and to be honest I don't wish to be like most people.....
I do not like the label Autism Spectrum Disorder this is not a Disorder this is a differrentness. I prefer Autistic Spectrum Variants. So lets be honest no one is going to cure us though we can learn to adapt and understand to a degree always knowing we are different. But knowing why I am different is sich a relief it's not because of something I'm doing wrong eg to much sugar, lack of self discipline, not enough sleep, lack of meditation etc.,
Finding ones interest and work? Look to what you enjoyed in your mid teens and return to those.
Why not join a group for late diagnosed adults or set one up yourself? I'm thinking of doing this. I wish to meet more people like me.
Give yourself a break and take your time. Also a good routine, eight hours sleep, exercise, healthy lifestyle, cutting down drugs and alchohol, strategies to cope with the overwelm, these all support wellbeing obviously the opposite detracts. I like to be alone and not lonely. Time on my own is calming and healing for me. Managing my work and taking breaks through the day a bit like a Microsoft employee! I enjoy people but prefer the company of men as they are simpler to understand!!!...
Living with someone even a life partner does not work for me, I need my own space when I try to live with someone it never works for me it's best that I keep my own home etc., though I guess if we had a large large house and he could have the west wing and I could have the east wing then that might work!
One day at a time and remember that brain scans actually shows our brains develop differently and faster, we are different but there are substantial numbers of us and society is begining to acknowledge us.
Friendship? People in general are always most comfortable with those who are most like them and share similar experiences. Go find them and I wish you a good life and I hope my sharing has been of help? Alas there is no 'How to' book but perhaps you could keep a diary and maybe share your journey someday? Enjoy. H
@@velvetindigonight Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I'm just 4 months into my journey of learning how I am, after 40+ years of living a mystery. I like what you wrote. I hope you've been able to meet other Aspies - I joined a local social group and found it enlightening to be around others with different behaviours but this common understanding. Best wishes to you.
To OP, its been a year since you posted, can you share any steps you found to be helpful? I am finding the same, that actual advice / things to do seems very vague and just the same things over and over.
My first reaction when I hear autism / autistic is "i'm definitely no" then I go ahead and struggle and unravel with living through what it looks like being one. THANK YOU for this. I got help but always learning of other people's experiences helps. Before getting help my philosophy was always 'ignore all emotions; it's ok you're a weirdo'. Nowadays I embrace not being like others, and strive to understand my and others' emotions as much as I can
Neurodiversity is not the opposite or a challenge to seeing autism as a disability. I am autistic, I am disabled, I believe in the ethos of Neurodiversity. People who say autism isn't a disability don't understand disability. It's not just that autism itself can be disabling, but that an inaccessible society disables us too. And honestly I've never heard someone say autism isn't a disability without sounding like they think disability is a terrible thing and disabled people are to be pitied.
Surely it needn't be a disability, and we should adapt access to education and work to ensure it is not a disablement? Not all disabilities are visible is a favourite shirt logo in respect of ASC, but each of us views disability differently.
Philip tattsbridge If we have to adapt access then it is a disability. The condition itself is only part of what makes someone disabled, an inaccessible society disables them to a much greater degree. And even in a fully accessible society, my neurodivergent brain is a disability.
Jill Rattray
Adapting is not a "disability", it's how society evolves to accept people's differences and diversity. Like how society adapts to different races and cultures. That's completely normal. Real disabilities are if a person cannot function at all regardless.
It makes life harder cause world is prepared for neurtypicals A high functioning Autist (so above 70iq and talking) who have cope mechanism for whatever happens on own spectrum would have a better life than a lot of average people who also need to cope with own difficulties, not talking about adhd like me and famous cases of autism+adhd which is usually one big life chaos..
Tears. Thank you for this amazing talk. I felt this very deeply.
Awesome Ted talk Elisabeth! One of the main things I got from watching is that those of us on the spectrum should embrace our different brains and enjoy the way we process the world! We should also make an effort to conform to behavioral standards so we don’t appear too weird. I feel motivated, perhaps by those pants!
Very helpful, wonderful to hear such an optimistic view of the gifts of autism
Amazing Presentation on All levels. Thank you and bless you. Sharing this and thinking of Myself as well. And watching this multiple times.
Thank you! That was absolutely brilliant! Insights that I very much needed. Will be sharing this extensively. Thank you again.
Very insightful talk, we do still have a long way to go in Africa. Just realised I'm on the spectrum at 31, so much misunderstandings around have took place and need to learn again how to act and talk socially
Great job of not only increasing awareness, Maribeth, but also inspiring action and expanding knowledge. Bravo and thank you.
Preach sister. Beautiful talk. Enlightening
Thank you Elisabeth! Brilliant! Diversity is beautiful and human rights essential.
Of all the many videos on this topic I've watched, on UA-cam and in professional settings, not one portrayed a person with brown skin. We understand how much representation matters and that everyone's voice should be heard. Please join in ensuring that as we speak out for our own interests, we advocate for diversity for all rainbows and spectra.
I'm also a woman diangosed with Aspergers. It not easy what we go thru, Even now I'm still trying to get myself indepent at 37 years old. Being that we are very high functioning that can also be a disadvantage too because other people don't bother that we have some type of disabilty.
Preach! I'm 31 trying to do the same. The annoying thing is that being quite good at hiding my awkwardness and effort it takes to act 'normal' leads people to believe it's not an issue anymore.
Truth. There is no autism "look" and we are good at "passing" for not autistic.
Lauren Marzlock: Education is key. Meanwhile, you have a nice life, brave one.
Very frustrating, as the reaction u get is that it must all be in my head because I look SO NORMAL!!! 🤮
I'm 21 and I realise that I am Asperger's. That's really well said Elisabeth, it's very great to finally recognize who I am
hi, i am 28 and currently going through the correct avenues to find out if i have been suffering in silence, so far a lot of stuff i have read i can resonate with and i am hoping this will finally help me move on in my life, sadly, i have lost a lot of love from my family as they would rather my behaviour is from taking drugs for years to mask my own emotions which are hyper sensitive .. i have learned to appear normal for years except i have never been able to change my situation, i have great deals of anxiety and depression that surrounds most social interaction... i wish everyone all the best in finding you truth
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I often feel like I have been missing the day they passed the social skills out. It explains so much about what I go through quite often! I would really like to get a autism diagnoses to confirm that I really have it.
I wish all this was my case now. My family still refuses to aknowledge my diagnose at 44 (I fell through the cracks in the 70s), even though I am a texbook presentation. I'm invalidated and so are my challenges, I'm invisible to most people here in my country. I have no relationship, still raising a daughter alone divorced. In my country I have no hope to remarrying is now clear to me being how I am. The only positive things of now knowing I am autistic are I at least now understand myself, being autistic has enabled me to have an amazing job because of how I process information and have found a nice online community but other than that I am alone. A year ago when I was diagnosed I posted here that this is how I felt too and I wanted all to go like it did for her, guess it was just wishful thinking. I will keep writing about the experience and hoping at least someone will benefit from my experiences.
Research the Cognitive Functions
Research "Extroverted feeling," and "Fe 7th" / "Fe PoLR."
Study the cognitive stack:
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wow what a brave woman you are! important speech.
This is very relatable. I'm 36 and realizing so much that I wasn't alone all this time. I never spoke up bc of how alone I truly thought I was on top of what she described. I feel like my life is just beginning for the first time. It's beginning with trauma therapy, but that's ok bc it's never too late! Thank you for this, thank you so much for this. I struggle so hard to articulate this now bc of longterm medical trauma. This is not just helpful for me but I think for others trying to understand the neurodiverse people in their lives. 🥰
What an awesome talk! And yes, I'm also different. The biggest obstacle is societal ignorance, as they don't like "different'. I never felt part of "normal" society.
Thank you for sharing your experience, feelings, and knowledge. I applaud your work toward self awareness and personal growth. I find that I share some of your traits, and suspect that they just fill in another part of the "spectrum." Once I understood them, it became easier to successfully integrate them into my lifestyle. Let us embrace our neurodivdersity along with our humanity. You might enjoy reading The Speed of Dark by Elisabeth Moon.
What I need in my journey towards a diagnosis is context. I've always felt like I wasn't given the guide book to socializing and being human, and I grew up feeling like a total alien, even though I didn't ever express that. I'm 22 and on my way to an assessment and it's a long, painful journey so far.
I'm also 22 and been thinking of a diagnosis. I'm scared though
@@highvickypie6187 A diagnosis will be so liberating, i promise
Love how she says high functioning after explaining many of the ways she wasn't functioning
THE REAL PROBLEM IS IGNORANCE AND INTOLERANCE AND JUDGEMENTS. THANK YOU ELISABETH, I WISH I HAD A FRIEND LIKE YOU