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Girl, I feel this! I’ve been debating whether I’m really a type 9 or not. When you described being so busy with little projects and getting bursts of energy for these little projects just to avoid a bigger task or overwhelming project was eye-opening. Thank you
I also have no idea what my bigger “calling” is. I could spend forever thinking about what it is and still not know - the indecisiveness sounds super 9 like. Any tips for fellow 9’s how to really figure out what they want, what their hobbies are, etc.
You’re welcome! And the “bigger calling” can be tough for a 9. I’ve coached so many 9s and helped them with this. It took me into my 30s to finally figure it out. My advice is to stay in tune with your desires and needs. Ask yourself what do you want? What makes your heart sing? What makes you feel alive?
I would LOVE to see a video about how to get "unstuck" as a 9. I get stuck (or even frozen or paralyzed) when I'm overwhelmed or stressed. A business coach recently suggested that I just "sit with the yucky feeling and observe what comes up" buttttttttttttttt I can literally get stuck and not do important tasks for a week or more at a time (all the while, building dread and shame and anxiety, making the issue way worse!), so that isn't super practical for me. I need tools to get out of my 9 stuck mode!
I so can totally relate! I think this is a great idea for a video! Thanks for the suggestion. I think my video on goals has some good nuggets that would help you with this in the meantime. Here's the link. You'll have to let me know what you think :) ua-cam.com/video/N7MLl78Qvr8/v-deo.html
For me as 9w8, I find the way I get unstuck is to get that crap out of me, plain and simple. Get rid of rhe stuff that triggers the 'I don't matter' thought cycle. I do that by being present to when I feel out of sorts or feel angry or feel not good enough or feel tired. When I notice this, I don't make my self wrong. I say to myself that this is happening only for the express purpose of helping me resonate with this stuff so that I can keep gently focusing on it and continue to let it go without attachment or worry. I think to myself that the universe/life is there to help me and whatever reality is currently active right in the moment is there to support me being free and peaceful by letting that crap go. I accept and I let the truth in (feels peaceful as I think it), and I quietly let go of what is disturbing inside myself (feels freeing and I find myself centered inside). It takes just a few minutes, and as I relax and trust it becomes very easy to do. It happens naturally, effectively, quickly, and gently when I commit to trusting that life is for me. Once that is done, suddenly I have the energy, focus, revelation intake that next step. It is truly amazing how simple the process is and how whole and empowered I feel afterwards. 🙂
I can totally relate to this, "anytime I tried to assert myself, i was either wrong, stupid..." yup, I've been living a lie. I love to hear other nines experiences, it makes me feel like I'm not alone. I really want to thank you for this, I know it takes a lot as a nine.
Thank you so much for sharing. I can relate so much. You'll have to let me know what you think of the Enneagram 9 video that just went live...This one was hard for me to put out there. But I know it's so important for us to hear each others stories. Again thank you for your comment.
hi hillary! finding your channel has been such a God sent gift. I thought I was a 2, then a 4, now I’m realizing I’m actually a 9 SX. I’ve been going back and fourth between 4&9 for a while now and your videos have been so helpful for me to find my type. I relate incredibly deeply to almost everything you’ve said about inertia, keeping myself busy with small things, and with not knowing what I want. I’ve been “stuck” for around 2 years since I graduated with a degree I realized in my last year that I’m not sure if I even want to work in. I just can’t believe you’re also a Christian!! I started crying when you started talking about how” sloth is saying no to the endless potential and possibilities that God has for us.” That’s exactly how i’ve felt these past two years but I have so many ideas & dreams about who I want to be that I’m overwhelmed and so scared of failure that i just stay where I’m comfortable. I know it was God who brought me to these videos & I’m so grateful for you!
OMG, I'm so happy I've found your channel! As a type 9, I totally understand the "holding back" to start doing what you do, but I am glad you started this channel. You are AWESOME in this! Keep the amazing work!
I completely relate to the sloth inside me! I tell myself that I have too many ideas and I'm easily distracted... but deep down I know I subconsciously do it, to not really give myself the time and effort to get in touch with myself. I am SO afraid of going deep inside like that, and I struggle knowing what I feel and think. My dad always told me I change my mind like the wind, and today I completely see the pattern and how easily I start to merge into what ever is occupying my interest. Eternal seach for meaning, when in reality, I can keep looking until there is no other option to stop, breathe and take that look inside!
As a 9w1 Sp/Sx INFP, your experiences strongly resonate with me. I just never believed I was "enough". I've always gone with everyone else's agendas instead of my own personal interests. I'm trying to overcome this and it is definitely a struggle. Thank you for discussing this topic.
This was so helpful for me. I rearrange my room literally twice a month to procrastinate on school work. Thank you so much for making these videos, you rock! :)
Asserting oneself as a 9 means leaning into the 8wing. This automatically gives me the drive for decisive action and going to 3. Thanks for this awesome video! I can totally relate to EVERYTHING you describe! I've been wanting to write for over 20 years, but there are always better authors and books and lyrics etc.. Who am I to make a difference?! After many months of reading into this, I've finally found out that I'm a 9, it all falls in place now. I quit ballet as a 5 yo because the teacher said that with my fat belly I would never be good at dancing. I remember the day she said that to me as if it were yesterday. I was happily dancing as if I was in a fairy tale and she just shouted that to me from the back of the classroom. I felt so ashamed. I kept my belly tucked in, but she said that wouldn't make a difference...That was one of the things among others which told me that I don't matter, whatever I do...
Oh, I just want to reach through this screen and tell you to go for it! Write! So many good books go unpublished because of not feelings good enough, fear, imposter syndrome etc... I say if it's a dream on your heart. Then you have a story that needs to be told. Thank you for sharing. Sorry about your dance experience...that's just so sad. We need to go back to who we were before the world told us who we couldn't be. You matter :)
I really want to thank you for this video. I'm a type 9, and the only way I have been trying to defeat my sloth has been through fear (I have been beating myself real hard), but God has used you to show me to be gracious to myself, and do the things that he wants me to do because he loves me... thank you so much
This information is life changing. At first when I heard sloth, I felt defeated. Realizing that the sloth doesn’t have to win.. it is a choice . Thank you for this video .
What you say about a 9's core weakness is feeling like your voice doesn't matter... Whew! That really has resonated with me recently, as far as realizing that not feeling heard has affected me my whole life... and I'm 53 now! It has affected my jobs, my friendships, my love relationships, really all parts of my life. I grew up with parents who did not really express emotions, at least not outwardly so us children could see and learn. I believe they were and are good people, and I think they also grew up with parents who didn't hear them, so they were doing the best they knew. My mother's key phrases to me growing up were, "Don't talk back!" and " Don't use that tone of voice with me!" I always felt she didn't care what I had to say, and never asked me how I felt about anything while growing up. And my dad worked so much that I almost never saw him, and then they divorced when I was seven and we saw him maybe every other weekend. And then my step parents were usually always right and were also not affectionate towards us (it's tough being a step parent). With relationships, in hindsight (which has been revealed after a very hard recent break up with someone I believe to be a very traumatized narcissist), I have always (since teenage years) sought out people who are unavailable in one way or another, or who have gone through a lot of trauma in their past, and here I come to save the day, thinking **I** will be the one who will love them and show them they're worthy of love... and in doing so I focused totally on them and didn't speak my own voice, and so I was not heard. It has felt like a vicious cycle. A part of me feels like maybe I just need to be single for the rest of my life... And yet another part of me still has hope that it's possible for me to find someone who will really listen, with whom I can feel safe and can practice speaking my own truth, and the more I feel heard the more I will open. This is huge for me right now. I know you weren't speaking directly to that in this video, but it brought up this reminder that I really need right now. I CAN be my authentic, peaceful, calm, loving self and still speak up for myself and be an equal partner. 💜
Love these videos! I'm learning a lot more about myself being a type 9. I see how sloth has shown up at work. My manager sat me down and told me I need to be working on what's important, not the easy/comfortable tasks. He showed me the Priority Matrix where I could sort what is important/urgent and what is not. This helps me so much to notice where I need to put my energy and focus, even in my personal life. For anyone that struggles with this issue, highly recommended! ^^
You made me cry, in a good self-awareness way. Now HOW do I KNOW my calling? I think God is pushing me towards focusing on the relationships in my life but also I don't want to busy myself from avoiding what I am really meant to be doing.
Awwww thank you for sharing. ❤️ I do offer coaching to help with this. Let me know if you want the link. I just don’t feel like I have a quick answer. For me it’s the peace in my heart. And it just won’t leave me. And it’s usually something outside my comfort zone 😂 God is funny like that sometimes. Hope this helps a little 🤗
Yeah I can relate to that staying busy thing... I am supposed to be working for my internship and preparing lessons for my class of students. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. So I spent about a week now trying to finding out my MBTI with other people, chatting with them, doing all the introspection.... and it seems so important for me to find that answer even though it's never about the thing I distract myself with, I just don't want to do the work I am supposed to be doing. I will literally find anything I can obsess over and tell myself that this is the main issue in my life now... and then when I actually get up to work because the dealine is almost there I realised that it is way easier than what I was doing all that time and I could've relaxed for REAL without that feeling of guilt...
Wow!! You put words to what I've been feeling. Thank you so much. In my prayer today, I was asking God to help me. He led me right to your channel and answered so many questions for me. Thanks so much for being you.
I just found you! I am also a 9 with an 8 wing. This resonates with me so powerfully. I have figured out that I fall asleep to things that I don't want to deal with. I am also very much an out-of-sight/out-of-mind person. I don't do things immediately if I can put them off -- and then I forget about them. It happens all the time. Thanks for this.
The busy work has become so painful, it’s like I am resenting myself for destroying so much of myself “serving what I love(family, friends, local businesses, whatever…)instead giving myself the life that I would want to love. The way I’ve combated this (after decades), is I now only give myself enough space to only do the things that I truly love…which is under one hand of items… Of course, I’ve learn we need to watch out for the rituals getting in the way of that “endless possibilities” that you speak of…(but dreamy distractions of the endless possibilities are another thing to be careful of…which is why I stick to the few things I give my life to). “Kind to yourself” seems to be the most difficult part still. Thanks for your efforts
I completely agree with this. I find myself doing a ton of little tasks and staying super busy when I am really stressed or trying to avoid something. It's almost like I make my life more chaos.
Absolutely! I know the fear is real. But a 9 will have a take small steps in listening to their own voice. Start with being assertive to yourself. Also, I know my mind/imagination will create potential conflicts before they even exist. And probably wouldn’t even happen. Part of the healing is the self awareness from learning about who you are, what you want, stopping yourself from merging etc...the other part is letting go of the fear of rejection. Play it out in your head. I’ll go through scenarios that bring me fear and lay them down. Stop letting them have power. Knowing that even if I get rejected I’m going to be okay. Push back will come. People have a hard time with change and when the 9 wakes up and finds there strength and courage it can be hard for others. This is okay. How to do it in a kind and confident way is exactly that. Be kind. Be you. Say your own thoughts and opinions. Practice will make it come easier and easier. I hope this helps! ❤️
Thank you for your help. I appreciate your time in answering my question. I will copy this and to reread it many times and try to put action to your suggestions.
🙋🏼♀️ yep! I find easy things to do. Usually for me that is reading a book about what I am interested in. 📚 I have been wanting to start a blog about personal development and health but I just keep reading books and articles and coming up with ideas instead of writing the posts about my efforts and recommendations implementing the development in my own life. Thank you for this video!
Yep! I can relate! But you’ve got this! The world needs to hear YOUR voice through your blog! Just start! If it’s not perfect it’s okay! Just be 1% better each time. I’ll be over here cheering you on! 📣🙌🏼❤️
When the video started I was like, “she’s gonna spill coffee on that white blanket!” Then you did! Sorry, I hope my worried vibe didn’t cause your spill!
Thank you for stepping out of your comfort zone and sharing your knowledge with us. I am new to enneagram and have recently realized I'm most likely a type 9. So much of this resonates with me.
Im 945 triple withdrawn and im physically and psychologically lazy.Also infp with low energy.Tapping into 4 helps me prioritizing what i want to do and be creative.Its really reviving
My passion was/is singing. I used to be really good until I stopped practicing because it created conflict with people in my life. I still feel a calling to it and it's very uncomfortable so I find all kinds of busy work and excuses to avoid it and I even sabotage my own practice so I don't get too good at it. If I choose to sing my fear is that everyone in my life will hate me so I usually do the bare minimum and don't try too hard at it. When I first started it was not a problem because I could do it privately but putting it out in the world is what brings up all my fears and has had me procrastinating for years but I need to just do it or I will only waste my life on less important things. Thank you for this video 🙏 This really helps me feel more comfortable taking those steps to move forward ❤
💯 me - 972 w/1 Sx ENFP. In my soul and the recesses of my subconscious, I knew this description to be true (especially the rearranging things/rooms/etc.). When it would be time to start a project, I would spend so much time researching (or trying to find just the right background/template, etc.). Do you find that once you are able to get whatever it is going, you could knock it out the park? I do. When there is a lot of time to do something, my inner voice says there’s plenty of time. So, it drops in priority compared to the easier things to do (because they could be done quickly and successfully). Then, when that thing absolutely has to be done...it gets done? Then, look back and think to myself, how I could have got it done earlier? Is this just me? (...and I am a rambler too...🤪). I’m thoroughly convinced that my spirit animal (patron is) is a chameleon. Does this fit the 9 in me?!?
Are you reading my journal?!?!? OMG! Yes! As soon as I (finally) start I go full force and get it done! And yes to the research! So much research. I think some of it is because we don’t want to make a mistake or be wrong as much as putting off the thing we need to be doing. And a chameleon totally fits a type 9. LOL! Thanks for sharing! I had fun reading your comment 😃
You're reading my journal too lol. So perhaps I am an enneagram 9. I really dont know... it's hard to figure out. I am also an ENFP, so maybe that's why I resonate with you(??). I have to every OTHER thing before I do the MAIN thing smh. In college, I would only do my research papers the night before they were due, even 20 pagers. However, I found out my brain was more creative then as well and I got more As and Bs, as opposed to doing papers early like others. Weird right?
@@kellikakes81 I'm a 9w1 and an INFJ (952 so/sp) and that's literally what I'm doing right now. I tripped across this video and am watching it as a way to procrastinate on my semester research paper lol. The details and amount of work are so overwhelming for me but the end product is always amazing and gets me an A. I'm actually better at writing papers within the last few hours than months or weeks beforehand. They're so much more creative and insightful then.
Wow. This is so painful to hear, so I know it’s exactly what I need to hear 😂 Thank you, thank you, thank you for your amazing example that we 9’s can wake up!! 💕
Type 9 I REALLY need to.see this!!! Also a Christian, and I know I am not doing what God is calling me to. Thank you for this, I'm also only halfway through this video but had to share...
I’m sooo glad I found your channel. I do important (nine) things, like going for a walk and connecting with nature but I also spend a ridiculous amount of time searching UA-cam for insight about me.... hoping to one day hear that one thing that will make it all makes sense and clear the path to movement. Finding your channel has made me so hopeful. I love your energy and personality and your honesty. An hour ago I was feeling down because I’ve always felt I have to constantly “grow” and that I’m not ok the way I am. I desperately want to not only accept embrace but to celebrate myself and after watching this video I think I am seeing a clearer path forward. When you said that any time you asserted yourself it didn’t go well, I related so much to that! I’m just so glad I found your channel. Thank you
I'm so glad too! I love that it has made you hopeful! This is a big reason why I have a series just for 9s. Its so important that we help each other out. Thanks for telling me a little about your journey! I love learning about other 9s.
Another awesome video Hillary! When you started talking about “busying yourself to avoid your calling!” Omg that hit me like a car. My eyes welled up I could relate so much! Thank you so much for your videos and I’m glad you got back to making videos! Thinking of you from across the pond! Paul :)
Paul! Yay! I’m so happy to hear from you! Thank you for sharing this. You are so talented! The world needs your voice, your gifts, and your talents. You have the kindest soul ❤️ so lovely to hear from you!
I know this is an old video but came across I now… wow. I feel SO seen. Thank you for getting around to doing this work! Your voice is what is nines need to hear ❤
The last few months I’ve developed a new passion for digital lettering and I feel really inspired to start my own small business. Usually with a new hobby or project like that I would be constantly held back by sloth and not get very far with it, but this time I’ve felt super motivated! I think partly because of my own personal growth recently, but also it shows me that maybe it’s a calling God has given me, which is awesome because I’ve spent so long looking for my passion/calling. It was so helpful to hear you say that only I can fulfil my calling, because I do often find myself thinking ‘but other people are doing the same thing but better!’ Those people aren’t me :’)
Hillary, thank you for your video. In prayer, I've felt convicted that I succumb to sloth way too often, but I thought I was being too critical of myself because I was working ALL THE TIME! Thank you for helping me understand what sloth looks like, practically speaking! Btw, it took 7 years for me to answer my call. I was a radical Call / change but as you mentioned, it took a long time due to inertia, self doubt, and not wanting to rock the boat. Thank you!
I am seeing this in 2022. I relate to you, and I wanted you to know that you should feel so proud of yourself for pushing through your sloth and wounded child beliefs. You know they say, “If I reach just one person…”. Well, look at all the people you have reached and helped! Heartfelt thanks…
I'd just like to say (and voice my opinion ayyyyy) that this is just so comforting. You talking of unproductive busy work makes me feel so heard. I'm excited to see how I can help myself after finding out I'm a type 9 today!
Thanks soooo much for your videos. I spent the last 2 days trying To figure out what my type was and your videos got me to a T. I’m a type 3w4, but I spend a lot of time in my 9 side and I been trying to understand this in myself. I have theses swings of depression and bingeing UA-cam and shows especially when I was younger. I understand myself so much more because of your videos. Thanks again!! 🙏🏾😄😄😁
Thanks Hillary. Just put in sloth type 9 and stumbled upon you. Trying to start something I’ve put off for years and decided I needed some help. Kept finding myself saying yes yes yes. Thank you. I’m going to really try and put time aside time to do this one overwhelming sort and create something beautiful and me.
Thanks, I am new to all this. Type 9 key is helping unlock so much inside me along with studying ACIM for a 2nd year with Robert and Hollie Holden . Thanks for being so bright and joyful sharing your type 9 😊
It's easy for me to zone out and then come up against some kind of deadline, and then I find myself doing unnecessary but compelling tasks that have nothing to do with what actually needs to be done.
Hi Hilary, this explains even more to me. At first I thought I was a five, but my hubby kept saying that I am more of a 9, only after listening to this video though, I begin to realize that I must be a 9. It is true also that I resonate a little bit with all types in the wheel.
I'm a INFJ enneagram 9w1 sp. I wish I had more energy, discipline, and motivation. It can be struggle surviving severe childhood abuse and having hypothyroidism. I do love to be organized and have a planner snd google calendar to plan out my days and daily routine. I definitely need to heal and take better care of my overall health.
Wow!! I am 50 and this has been life changing! I just found out I’m a 9 and this video has enlightening me so much about what I considered my past failures. Thank you!!
Hit the nail on the head for me! I’d love to hear how to navigate falling asleep to one’s dreams as a Mom of young ones. Studying myself as a 9 has made me realize that I’ve fallen asleep to multiple dreams because of life’s circumstances and priorities as a wife/mother. My goal is to pursue those at a later time, but it does often feel deflating and I struggle with envy at times to those who are able to commit to their “goals” (whether it be simple achievements, such as having time to exercise or meditate or other goals, such as pursue a certain career) more easily. I love my life, but this is something I’ve recently discovered.
You are so right that only you can do exactly what you are doing. Sometimes I watch the really long, complicated enneagram videos and I overthink one little thing they say, but then I watch your videos and I feel like I understand the big picture much more clearly. Plus you are really nice and reassuring! :)
Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for putting this video up, I came by 6 months ago and like to rewtch this so that i can be reminded to slap out of 'sloth mode'.
🎯🎯🎯 it’s not ok to assert myself. Sharing my opinion on anything feels risky, because I need to fit in, be accepted so I can’t risk being seen as wrong
Thank you for this video! It took me a long time to realize that I don't have a calling to do a specific thing, but I've chosen a career that will allow me to fulfill my calling (to make the world a better place) and fit the lifestyle I want, and I'm about to return to school in the fall!
This video is a whole big fat bucket of real talk, for sure. I like the Enneagram, and I identify strongly as a 9w1 SP/SX - and I find it more approachable than MBTI, though I also value that system (INFP, if one wonders) but I also find there’s intersectionality with other methods of self identification and self knowledge... you and I had similar childhood experiences (my dad being an aggressive 8 and also clearly a cluster B personality) and with a current working diagnosis of General Anxiety Disorder, I wonder... E9 describes a lot of things that are also inherent in less-than-awesome psychological conditions. I’m about 99% sure I have ADHD-inattentive... so I really do wonder. ADHD or E9? Or both? Or some future system we haven’t figured out yet? 🤔
Thank you for this comment. Love that we can share and not feel alone. You bring up some good things that I don't have the answer for. I was diagnosed with GAD in my mid 30's. I felt like maybe it might be PTSD. That I was starting to deal with things I had fought to escape. I just don't know.
@@enneagramandcoaching I appreciate the reply, and you don’t have to have the answers - it’s really ok - these things are about the mapping of the self and the language (or paradigm) we select to try to better grasp it. I appreciate your candor and I also sympathize with the areas you have had trouble with.
9w8 here. Absolutely. When I start to consider my dreams or ideas, I think "the world doesn't need more noise" or "what makes my idea special?" It's awful. Trying my best to ignore that thought!
Such a strong link between the 9 and the 4. Learning from the 4 can reassure you that you're the only one who can do what you are meant to do. Tapping into that individualism. As a 4, I held myself back due to the defective feeling. Always believing something is wrong with me and if I try to put myself out there, no one will understand me.
I relate to having an idea to do something and not doing it because it feels overwhelming and not knowing how to start. I believe I was supposed to start a UA-cam channel 10 years ago. I recorded one video, posted it, and stopped. I think about it at least once a year and freeze up.
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🤣🤣🤣 all me...mind blowing how different we can feel till we learn more. God has really been revealing things so beautifully. God bless you for sharing your light 💞
Sloth is definitely my default! I struggle with my music and putting in out because it's not mainstream and I don't know what to even call it 🤣 so many people doing music today but it's definitely my passion since I was 3 I knew that's what I wanted to do with my life. Inspire and maybe help lift people with music! Thank you for your light and sharing this wonderful knowledge of deeper meanings in personality. 💞
I’m a 9 and found your channel and am so thankful for you putting yourself out there and bring so transparent. This channel has helped me learn about myself sooo much more! Thank you so much!! ❤️
Wow. I never realized that is what I am doing, but I absolutely have that sloth come out ALL the time! I find myself doing pointless things for hours to avoid the work I know I need to be getting done. I have had to delete all games on my phone, because it is so easy for me to just "take a break" and start on the task I need to do later. And then it's 3 hours later... oops. Your insights into this are eye opening, and I am going to start working to grow in this area today! (As soon as I quit procrastinating from work by watching all of your videos haha)
Just listening to this video made me weep. I have been thinking for a while that I am a type 2 but after listening to this I feel there is not doubt that I am a type 9. Thank you so much for what you are doing. It's amazing how God is using you to make a difference.
I have notoced that it was so difficult to see that I am a type 9w1so/sx, that these videos are very helpful, they clarify nineness, I can relate thing that I see in my own life too.
I definitely think my younger brother is a 9. He's been wanting to learn photography for a long time, but he struggles with actually getting started with it. I'm a 3, but I do see myself going towards a 9 in stress cause I will stay busy doing other things, rather than what I should actually be doing.
I think you are amazing and you are my favorite Enneagram coach! It does break my heart a little every time you give me a glimpse into 9's. My former husband is a 9 and to see a little nside of what made him tick makes me uncomfortable. Definitely some problems could have been dealt with better if only I had known all of this earlier. I don't think you mention the tri-type often if any but I am pretty sure I am a 739 and I can see at certain points the 9ness in some things I do...particularly remodeling my bedroom...This project was started at least in the planning stages BEFORE you were supposed to start a youtube channel. I hve started but the task seems daunting...too big especially for someone who does not like working alone. I'm also indecisive about color schemes. I will decide definitely and then change my mind...sigh
I am definitely a nine and I think my subtype is SP. Not sure about my wing yet…I’m new at this. Now reading a book called Enneagram for Spiritual Formation. By AJ Sherrill
Thankful for your 'talks' :) My husband and I are retired (over 65yo) I'm a 9w8 and he's an 8w7. Now that he's home most of the time and we do most things together, I'm finding it difficult to always give into his little demands (which is a bad habit I started when 'we' home schooled our 6 children)...While he was the sole bread-winner and I was home all day with the kids, he'd come home and expect the work-world to match how we do things at home. I was pregnant and nursing babies for 17 years straight. Can you imagine caring for 6 children under 12 and educating them as a 9? I used lots of charts and checklists :D Anyway, do you have any videos about relationships between a 9w8 and an 8w7? Thanks for your help ♥
Wow. Thanks for sharing. I have a few videos with my husband who is a type 9. Also we have another channel (travel channel @vancaskeys) and you get a great look at a marriage between myself (type 9) and my husband (type 8) 😃
Most probably not 9, but...For me sloth is like giving up. From my childhood I had the same saying "I can never do it". (When learning or trying something new) So why even try? Grown up, and still don't know what I really want and what my purpose is. No real talents, and comfort zone is so comfy.
This hits me at my innermost. What about someone who has repressed their purpose for so long that they don’t know what it is. It’s probably why I’m so depressed. How do I connect with my purpose again?
That’s a huge issue with 9s. I have a newer video that helps 9s with this. Here’s the link ua-cam.com/video/N-VKlTCcXoM/v-deo.html -thanks for sharing! ❤️
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I'll book a session, even though I've narrowed my type down a bit
@@pointerdogmarketing2197 Sounds great!
Ugh ... "Sloth is saying no to the endless potential and possibilites God has for us". That hurts, but it is also good motivation. Thanks!
Yes! Use it as motivation! Thanks for sharing Anita!
Girl, I feel this! I’ve been debating whether I’m really a type 9 or not. When you described being so busy with little projects and getting bursts of energy for these little projects just to avoid a bigger task or overwhelming project was eye-opening. Thank you
I also have no idea what my bigger “calling” is. I could spend forever thinking about what it is and still not know - the indecisiveness sounds super 9 like. Any tips for fellow 9’s how to really figure out what they want, what their hobbies are, etc.
You’re welcome! And the “bigger calling” can be tough for a 9. I’ve coached so many 9s and helped them with this. It took me into my 30s to finally figure it out. My advice is to stay in tune with your desires and needs. Ask yourself what do you want? What makes your heart sing? What makes you feel alive?
I would LOVE to see a video about how to get "unstuck" as a 9. I get stuck (or even frozen or paralyzed) when I'm overwhelmed or stressed. A business coach recently suggested that I just "sit with the yucky feeling and observe what comes up" buttttttttttttttt I can literally get stuck and not do important tasks for a week or more at a time (all the while, building dread and shame and anxiety, making the issue way worse!), so that isn't super practical for me. I need tools to get out of my 9 stuck mode!
I so can totally relate! I think this is a great idea for a video! Thanks for the suggestion. I think my video on goals has some good nuggets that would help you with this in the meantime. Here's the link. You'll have to let me know what you think :) ua-cam.com/video/N7MLl78Qvr8/v-deo.html
This video doesnt do that?!? I need thay
For me as 9w8, I find the way I get unstuck is to get that crap out of me, plain and simple. Get rid of rhe stuff that triggers the 'I don't matter' thought cycle. I do that by being present to when I feel out of sorts or feel angry or feel not good enough or feel tired. When I notice this, I don't make my self wrong. I say to myself that this is happening only for the express purpose of helping me resonate with this stuff so that I can keep gently focusing on it and continue to let it go without attachment or worry. I think to myself that the universe/life is there to help me and whatever reality is currently active right in the moment is there to support me being free and peaceful by letting that crap go. I accept and I let the truth in (feels peaceful as I think it), and I quietly let go of what is disturbing inside myself (feels freeing and I find myself centered inside). It takes just a few minutes, and as I relax and trust it becomes very easy to do. It happens naturally, effectively, quickly, and gently when I commit to trusting that life is for me. Once that is done, suddenly I have the energy, focus, revelation intake that next step. It is truly amazing how simple the process is and how whole and empowered I feel afterwards. 🙂
I can totally relate to this, "anytime I tried to assert myself, i was either wrong, stupid..." yup, I've been living a lie. I love to hear other nines experiences, it makes me feel like I'm not alone. I really want to thank you for this, I know it takes a lot as a nine.
Thank you so much for sharing. I can relate so much. You'll have to let me know what you think of the Enneagram 9 video that just went live...This one was hard for me to put out there. But I know it's so important for us to hear each others stories. Again thank you for your comment.
hi hillary! finding your channel has been such a God sent gift. I thought I was a 2, then a 4, now I’m realizing I’m actually a 9 SX. I’ve been going back and fourth between 4&9 for a while now and your videos have been so helpful for me to find my type.
I relate incredibly deeply to almost everything you’ve said about inertia, keeping myself busy with small things, and with not knowing what I want. I’ve been “stuck” for around 2 years since I graduated with a degree I realized in my last year that I’m not sure if I even want to work in.
I just can’t believe you’re also a Christian!! I started crying when you started talking about how” sloth is saying no to the endless potential and possibilities that God has for us.” That’s exactly how i’ve felt these past two years but I have so many ideas & dreams about who I want to be that I’m overwhelmed and so scared of failure that i just stay where I’m comfortable.
I know it was God who brought me to these videos & I’m so grateful for you!
OMG, I'm so happy I've found your channel! As a type 9, I totally understand the "holding back" to start doing what you do, but I am glad you started this channel. You are AWESOME in this! Keep the amazing work!
Oh yay! Me too! Thank you! This means the world to me! ❤️
I completely relate to the sloth inside me! I tell myself that I have too many ideas and I'm easily distracted... but deep down I know I subconsciously do it, to not really give myself the time and effort to get in touch with myself. I am SO afraid of going deep inside like that, and I struggle knowing what I feel and think. My dad always told me I change my mind like the wind, and today I completely see the pattern and how easily I start to merge into what ever is occupying my interest. Eternal seach for meaning, when in reality, I can keep looking until there is no other option to stop, breathe and take that look inside!
As a 9w1 Sp/Sx INFP, your experiences strongly resonate with me. I just never believed I was "enough". I've always gone with everyone else's agendas instead of my own personal interests. I'm trying to overcome this and it is definitely a struggle. Thank you for discussing this topic.
Thank you for sharing. ❤️❤️❤️
This was so helpful for me. I rearrange my room literally twice a month to procrastinate on school work. Thank you so much for making these videos, you rock! :)
Hahaha! This is awesome! 😂
Asserting oneself as a 9 means leaning into the 8wing. This automatically gives me the drive for decisive action and going to 3. Thanks for this awesome video! I can totally relate to EVERYTHING you describe! I've been wanting to write for over 20 years, but there are always better authors and books and lyrics etc.. Who am I to make a difference?! After many months of reading into this, I've finally found out that I'm a 9, it all falls in place now. I quit ballet as a 5 yo because the teacher said that with my fat belly I would never be good at dancing. I remember the day she said that to me as if it were yesterday. I was happily dancing as if I was in a fairy tale and she just shouted that to me from the back of the classroom. I felt so ashamed. I kept my belly tucked in, but she said that wouldn't make a difference...That was one of the things among others which told me that I don't matter, whatever I do...
Oh, I just want to reach through this screen and tell you to go for it! Write! So many good books go unpublished because of not feelings good enough, fear, imposter syndrome etc... I say if it's a dream on your heart. Then you have a story that needs to be told. Thank you for sharing. Sorry about your dance experience...that's just so sad. We need to go back to who we were before the world told us who we couldn't be. You matter :)
I really want to thank you for this video. I'm a type 9, and the only way I have been trying to defeat my sloth has been through fear (I have been beating myself real hard), but God has used you to show me to be gracious to myself, and do the things that he wants me to do because he loves me... thank you so much
This information is life changing. At first when I heard sloth, I felt defeated. Realizing that the sloth doesn’t have to win.. it is a choice . Thank you for this video .
Glad it helped! Love it!
What you say about a 9's core weakness is feeling like your voice doesn't matter... Whew! That really has resonated with me recently, as far as realizing that not feeling heard has affected me my whole life... and I'm 53 now! It has affected my jobs, my friendships, my love relationships, really all parts of my life. I grew up with parents who did not really express emotions, at least not outwardly so us children could see and learn. I believe they were and are good people, and I think they also grew up with parents who didn't hear them, so they were doing the best they knew. My mother's key phrases to me growing up were, "Don't talk back!" and " Don't use that tone of voice with me!" I always felt she didn't care what I had to say, and never asked me how I felt about anything while growing up. And my dad worked so much that I almost never saw him, and then they divorced when I was seven and we saw him maybe every other weekend. And then my step parents were usually always right and were also not affectionate towards us (it's tough being a step parent). With relationships, in hindsight (which has been revealed after a very hard recent break up with someone I believe to be a very traumatized narcissist), I have always (since teenage years) sought out people who are unavailable in one way or another, or who have gone through a lot of trauma in their past, and here I come to save the day, thinking **I** will be the one who will love them and show them they're worthy of love... and in doing so I focused totally on them and didn't speak my own voice, and so I was not heard. It has felt like a vicious cycle. A part of me feels like maybe I just need to be single for the rest of my life... And yet another part of me still has hope that it's possible for me to find someone who will really listen, with whom I can feel safe and can practice speaking my own truth, and the more I feel heard the more I will open. This is huge for me right now. I know you weren't speaking directly to that in this video, but it brought up this reminder that I really need right now. I CAN be my authentic, peaceful, calm, loving self and still speak up for myself and be an equal partner. 💜
Be kind to yourself, I’m kind to others around me but I’m not kind to myself. Hit me hard thanks I love that I found your channel.
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Love these videos! I'm learning a lot more about myself being a type 9. I see how sloth has shown up at work. My manager sat me down and told me I need to be working on what's important, not the easy/comfortable tasks. He showed me the Priority Matrix where I could sort what is important/urgent and what is not. This helps me so much to notice where I need to put my energy and focus, even in my personal life. For anyone that struggles with this issue, highly recommended! ^^
That is awesome!
You made me cry, in a good self-awareness way. Now HOW do I KNOW my calling? I think God is pushing me towards focusing on the relationships in my life but also I don't want to busy myself from avoiding what I am really meant to be doing.
Awwww thank you for sharing. ❤️ I do offer coaching to help with this. Let me know if you want the link. I just don’t feel like I have a quick answer. For me it’s the peace in my heart. And it just won’t leave me. And it’s usually something outside my comfort zone 😂 God is funny like that sometimes. Hope this helps a little 🤗
@@enneagramandcoaching how much is your coaching?
@@jenniemckinney8054 It starts at $97. Here is my website for you to check it out :) www.enneagramandcoaching.com
Yeah I can relate to that staying busy thing... I am supposed to be working for my internship and preparing lessons for my class of students. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. So I spent about a week now trying to finding out my MBTI with other people, chatting with them, doing all the introspection.... and it seems so important for me to find that answer even though it's never about the thing I distract myself with, I just don't want to do the work I am supposed to be doing. I will literally find anything I can obsess over and tell myself that this is the main issue in my life now...
and then when I actually get up to work because the dealine is almost there I realised that it is way easier than what I was doing all that time and I could've relaxed for REAL without that feeling of guilt...
Omg! I can relate to this so much!!!!! 😂 thanks for sharing!
Wow!! You put words to what I've been feeling. Thank you so much. In my prayer today, I was asking God to help me. He led me right to your channel and answered so many questions for me. Thanks so much for being you.
Wonderful! I love this! It means so much to me that you shared this with me! 💛
I just found you! I am also a 9 with an 8 wing. This resonates with me so powerfully. I have figured out that I fall asleep to things that I don't want to deal with. I am also very much an out-of-sight/out-of-mind person. I don't do things immediately if I can put them off -- and then I forget about them. It happens all the time. Thanks for this.
You are so welcome ❤️❤️❤️ thank you for sharing!
The busy work has become so painful, it’s like I am resenting myself for destroying so much of myself “serving what I love(family, friends, local businesses, whatever…)instead giving myself the life that I would want to love.
The way I’ve combated this (after decades), is I now only give myself enough space to only do the things that I truly love…which is under one hand of items…
Of course, I’ve learn we need to watch out for the rituals getting in the way of that “endless possibilities” that you speak of…(but dreamy distractions of the endless possibilities are another thing to be careful of…which is why I stick to the few things I give my life to).
“Kind to yourself” seems to be the most difficult part still.
Thanks for your efforts
I completely agree with this. I find myself doing a ton of little tasks and staying super busy when I am really stressed or trying to avoid something. It's almost like I make my life more chaos.
I hadn’t thought of it like that but it’s so true!
🙋🏿♂️ I am currently watching this video because I need to record myself for a final that is due in 90 minutes... so I agree
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I'm a 9w1 and I live in a studio apartment. Which MEANS I can rearrange my living space endlessly which as you can imagine - I do.
😂😂😂 I totally get this!
🖐Me! This describes me. I can remember feeling better about the hard project I have in front of me after I've been doing "busy" work.
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Can you talk specifically on how a 9 can assert themselves without fear of reaction or push back and how to do it in a kind yet confident way?
Absolutely! I know the fear is real. But a 9 will have a take small steps in listening to their own voice. Start with being assertive to yourself. Also, I know my mind/imagination will create potential conflicts before they even exist. And probably wouldn’t even happen. Part of the healing is the self awareness from learning about who you are, what you want, stopping yourself from merging etc...the other part is letting go of the fear of rejection. Play it out in your head. I’ll go through scenarios that bring me fear and lay them down. Stop letting them have power. Knowing that even if I get rejected I’m going to be okay. Push back will come. People have a hard time with change and when the 9 wakes up and finds there strength and courage it can be hard for others. This is okay. How to do it in a kind and confident way is exactly that. Be kind. Be you. Say your own thoughts and opinions. Practice will make it come easier and easier. I hope this helps! ❤️
Thank you for your help. I appreciate your time in answering my question. I will copy this and to reread it many times and try to put action to your suggestions.
You’re so welcome! ❤️
🙋🏼♀️ yep! I find easy things to do. Usually for me that is reading a book about what I am interested in. 📚 I have been wanting to start a blog about personal development and health but I just keep reading books and articles and coming up with ideas instead of writing the posts about my efforts and recommendations implementing the development in my own life. Thank you for this video!
Yep! I can relate! But you’ve got this! The world needs to hear YOUR voice through your blog! Just start! If it’s not perfect it’s okay! Just be 1% better each time. I’ll be over here cheering you on! 📣🙌🏼❤️
When the video started I was like, “she’s gonna spill coffee on that white blanket!” Then you did! Sorry, I hope my worried vibe didn’t cause your spill!
😂😂😂 you called it!
Thank you for stepping out of your comfort zone and sharing your knowledge with us. I am new to enneagram and have recently realized I'm most likely a type 9. So much of this resonates with me.
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Im 945 triple withdrawn and im physically and psychologically lazy.Also infp with low energy.Tapping into 4 helps me prioritizing what i want to do and be creative.Its really reviving
My passion was/is singing. I used to be really good until I stopped practicing because it created conflict with people in my life. I still feel a calling to it and it's very uncomfortable so I find all kinds of busy work and excuses to avoid it and I even sabotage my own practice so I don't get too good at it. If I choose to sing my fear is that everyone in my life will hate me so I usually do the bare minimum and don't try too hard at it. When I first started it was not a problem because I could do it privately but putting it out in the world is what brings up all my fears and has had me procrastinating for years but I need to just do it or I will only waste my life on less important things. Thank you for this video 🙏 This really helps me feel more comfortable taking those steps to move forward ❤
💯 me - 972 w/1 Sx ENFP. In my soul and the recesses of my subconscious, I knew this description to be true (especially the rearranging things/rooms/etc.). When it would be time to start a project, I would spend so much time researching (or trying to find just the right background/template, etc.).
Do you find that once you are able to get whatever it is going, you could knock it out the park? I do. When there is a lot of time to do something, my inner voice says there’s plenty of time. So, it drops in priority compared to the easier things to do (because they could be done quickly and successfully). Then, when that thing absolutely has to be done...it gets done? Then, look back and think to myself, how I could have got it done earlier? Is this just me? (...and I am a rambler too...🤪).
I’m thoroughly convinced that my spirit animal (patron is) is a chameleon. Does this fit the 9 in me?!?
Are you reading my journal?!?!? OMG! Yes! As soon as I (finally) start I go full force and get it done! And yes to the research! So much research. I think some of it is because we don’t want to make a mistake or be wrong as much as putting off the thing we need to be doing. And a chameleon totally fits a type 9. LOL! Thanks for sharing! I had fun reading your comment 😃
You're reading my journal too lol. So perhaps I am an enneagram 9. I really dont know... it's hard to figure out. I am also an ENFP, so maybe that's why I resonate with you(??). I have to every OTHER thing before I do the MAIN thing smh. In college, I would only do my research papers the night before they were due, even 20 pagers. However, I found out my brain was more creative then as well and I got more As and Bs, as opposed to doing papers early like others. Weird right?
@@kellikakes81 I'm a 9w1 and an INFJ (952 so/sp) and that's literally what I'm doing right now. I tripped across this video and am watching it as a way to procrastinate on my semester research paper lol. The details and amount of work are so overwhelming for me but the end product is always amazing and gets me an A. I'm actually better at writing papers within the last few hours than months or weeks beforehand. They're so much more creative and insightful then.
Subconsciously
Limiting
Opportunities
Through
Hesitancy
Soooooo relatable.
Wow. This is so painful to hear, so I know it’s exactly what I need to hear 😂 Thank you, thank you, thank you for your amazing example that we 9’s can wake up!! 💕
Type 9 I REALLY need to.see this!!! Also a Christian, and I know I am not doing what God is calling me to. Thank you for this, I'm also only halfway through this video but had to share...
Love this!!! Thanks for sharing! ❤️
I’m sooo glad I found your channel. I do important (nine) things, like going for a walk and connecting with nature but I also spend a ridiculous amount of time searching UA-cam for insight about me.... hoping to one day hear that one thing that will make it all makes sense and clear the path to movement.
Finding your channel has made me so hopeful. I love your energy and personality and your honesty. An hour ago I was feeling down because I’ve always felt I have to constantly “grow” and that I’m not ok the way I am. I desperately want to not only accept embrace but to celebrate myself and after watching this video I think I am seeing a clearer path forward. When you said that any time you asserted yourself it didn’t go well, I related so much to that! I’m just so glad I found your channel. Thank you
I'm so glad too! I love that it has made you hopeful! This is a big reason why I have a series just for 9s. Its so important that we help each other out. Thanks for telling me a little about your journey! I love learning about other 9s.
Thank you for your vulnerability in this video. Your transparency is admirable.
Thank you ❤️❤️❤️
Another awesome video Hillary! When you started talking about “busying yourself to avoid your calling!” Omg that hit me like a car. My eyes welled up I could relate so much! Thank you so much for your videos and I’m glad you got back to making videos! Thinking of you from across the pond! Paul :)
Paul! Yay! I’m so happy to hear from you! Thank you for sharing this. You are so talented! The world needs your voice, your gifts, and your talents. You have the kindest soul ❤️ so lovely to hear from you!
I never understood the "down to earth" thing about my persona, but every time a watch a video about a type 9, I definitely see it loll
I know this is an old video but came across I now… wow. I feel SO seen. Thank you for getting around to doing this work! Your voice is what is nines need to hear ❤
Wow, thank you! Love that you felt so seen!!!!
The last few months I’ve developed a new passion for digital lettering and I feel really inspired to start my own small business. Usually with a new hobby or project like that I would be constantly held back by sloth and not get very far with it, but this time I’ve felt super motivated! I think partly because of my own personal growth recently, but also it shows me that maybe it’s a calling God has given me, which is awesome because I’ve spent so long looking for my passion/calling. It was so helpful to hear you say that only I can fulfil my calling, because I do often find myself thinking ‘but other people are doing the same thing but better!’ Those people aren’t me :’)
I have seen your stuff! It’s sooooo good!!!!!!! I’m super proud of you! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
9w8 here and I swear sloth is by far the worst weakness among all the ennegrams...
Agreed!😅
@@enneagramandcoaching Anyway to reverse it fully? I'm 23 years of age and struggling here
Hillary, thank you for your video. In prayer, I've felt convicted that I succumb to sloth way too often, but I thought I was being too critical of myself because I was working ALL THE TIME! Thank you for helping me understand what sloth looks like, practically speaking! Btw, it took 7 years for me to answer my call. I was a radical Call / change but as you mentioned, it took a long time due to inertia, self doubt, and not wanting to rock the boat. Thank you!
I am seeing this in 2022. I relate to you, and I wanted you to know that you should feel so proud of yourself for pushing through your sloth and wounded child beliefs. You know they say, “If I reach just one person…”. Well, look at all the people you have reached and helped! Heartfelt thanks…
Awww this was such a sweet comment to read! Thank you so much! ❤
Currently leaning on my 1 wing to help me clean, LOL. We love you 1’s.
That is awesome!
Oh wow!! I see myself in the endless spin cycle!! I relate so much to what you are saying!!
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I'd just like to say (and voice my opinion ayyyyy) that this is just so comforting. You talking of unproductive busy work makes me feel so heard. I'm excited to see how I can help myself after finding out I'm a type 9 today!
Yay! Love this! Thanks for sharing ❤️
" We're busy and we don't do what we supposed to do "
That hit hard 😂👌
Oh my gosh..🙈its like your jumped into my heart..wow!!
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Thanks soooo much for your videos. I spent the last 2 days trying To figure out what my type was and your videos got me to a T. I’m a type 3w4, but I spend a lot of time in my 9 side and I been trying to understand this in myself. I have theses swings of depression and bingeing UA-cam and shows especially when I was younger. I understand myself so much more because of your videos. Thanks again!! 🙏🏾😄😄😁
Aww thanks for sharing this with me. I love that my videos have helped you understand yourself so much more!
Thanks Hillary. Just put in sloth type 9 and stumbled upon you. Trying to start something I’ve put off for years and decided I needed some help. Kept finding myself saying yes yes yes. Thank you. I’m going to really try and put time aside time to do this one overwhelming sort and create something beautiful and me.
Thanks, I am new to all this. Type 9 key is helping unlock so much inside me along with studying ACIM for a 2nd year with Robert and Hollie Holden . Thanks for being so bright and joyful sharing your type 9 😊
It's easy for me to zone out and then come up against some kind of deadline, and then I find myself doing unnecessary but compelling tasks that have nothing to do with what actually needs to be done.
Hi Hilary, this explains even more to me. At first I thought I was a five, but my hubby kept saying that I am more of a 9, only after listening to this video though, I begin to realize that I must be a 9.
It is true also that I resonate a little bit with all types in the wheel.
I'm a INFJ enneagram 9w1 sp. I wish I had more energy, discipline, and motivation. It can be struggle surviving severe childhood abuse and having hypothyroidism. I do love to be organized and have a planner snd google calendar to plan out my days and daily routine. I definitely need to heal and take better care of my overall health.
my problems with paying bills! finally, i don't feel like an aberration! still working on it, but thanks for the tip!
You’re welcome!!!! You’ve got this!! You’re not alone!
@@enneagramandcoaching Thank you so much!
Wow!! I am 50 and this has been life changing! I just found out I’m a 9 and this video has enlightening me so much about what I considered my past failures. Thank you!!
Love this! ❤️
🙋🏼♀️There every day.
Ahaha I've been called out. Gonna do more small projects like learning more about enneagram
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I’m so happy you finally went for your channel!
Thank you! ❤️
Hit the nail on the head for me! I’d love to hear how to navigate falling asleep to one’s dreams as a Mom of young ones. Studying myself as a 9 has made me realize that I’ve fallen asleep to multiple dreams because of life’s circumstances and priorities as a wife/mother. My goal is to pursue those at a later time, but it does often feel deflating and I struggle with envy at times to those who are able to commit to their “goals” (whether it be simple achievements, such as having time to exercise or meditate or other goals, such as pursue a certain career) more easily. I love my life, but this is something I’ve recently discovered.
You are so right that only you can do exactly what you are doing. Sometimes I watch the really long, complicated enneagram videos and I overthink one little thing they say, but then I watch your videos and I feel like I understand the big picture much more clearly. Plus you are really nice and reassuring! :)
This makes my day! Thank you for sharing this with me and being so kind ❤️
Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for putting this video up, I came by 6 months ago and like to rewtch this so that i can be reminded to slap out of 'sloth mode'.
🎯🎯🎯 it’s not ok to assert myself. Sharing my opinion on anything feels risky, because I need to fit in, be accepted so I can’t risk being seen as wrong
Thank you for this video! It took me a long time to realize that I don't have a calling to do a specific thing, but I've chosen a career that will allow me to fulfill my calling (to make the world a better place) and fit the lifestyle I want, and I'm about to return to school in the fall!
Awesome! Thank you for sharing! ❤️ I’m cheering you on!
This video is a whole big fat bucket of real talk, for sure. I like the Enneagram, and I identify strongly as a 9w1 SP/SX - and I find it more approachable than MBTI, though I also value that system (INFP, if one wonders) but I also find there’s intersectionality with other methods of self identification and self knowledge... you and I had similar childhood experiences (my dad being an aggressive 8 and also clearly a cluster B personality) and with a current working diagnosis of General Anxiety Disorder, I wonder... E9 describes a lot of things that are also inherent in less-than-awesome psychological conditions. I’m about 99% sure I have ADHD-inattentive... so I really do wonder. ADHD or E9? Or both? Or some future system we haven’t figured out yet? 🤔
Thank you for this comment. Love that we can share and not feel alone. You bring up some good things that I don't have the answer for. I was diagnosed with GAD in my mid 30's. I felt like maybe it might be PTSD. That I was starting to deal with things I had fought to escape. I just don't know.
@@enneagramandcoaching I appreciate the reply, and you don’t have to have the answers - it’s really ok - these things are about the mapping of the self and the language (or paradigm) we select to try to better grasp it. I appreciate your candor and I also sympathize with the areas you have had trouble with.
Thank you. Your words are kind and I appreciate them. And your so right.
9w8 here. Absolutely. When I start to consider my dreams or ideas, I think "the world doesn't need more noise" or "what makes my idea special?" It's awful. Trying my best to ignore that thought!
Such a strong link between the 9 and the 4. Learning from the 4 can reassure you that you're the only one who can do what you are meant to do. Tapping into that individualism. As a 4, I held myself back due to the defective feeling. Always believing something is wrong with me and if I try to put myself out there, no one will understand me.
Jessica-the link is strong. And you bring up a really great point, that we can learn from each other. I love it ❤️ Thank you for your wisdom.
@@enneagramandcoaching I did a vid and mentioned this of yours: ua-cam.com/video/xfHe_pnUTRM/v-deo.html
I relate to having an idea to do something and not doing it because it feels overwhelming and not knowing how to start. I believe I was supposed to start a UA-cam channel 10 years ago. I recorded one video, posted it, and stopped. I think about it at least once a year and freeze up.
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🤣🤣🤣 all me...mind blowing how different we can feel till we learn more. God has really been revealing things so beautifully. God bless you for sharing your light 💞
Love it!! Thank you!
Sloth is definitely my default! I struggle with my music and putting in out because it's not mainstream and I don't know what to even call it 🤣 so many people doing music today but it's definitely my passion since I was 3 I knew that's what I wanted to do with my life. Inspire and maybe help lift people with music! Thank you for your light and sharing this wonderful knowledge of deeper meanings in personality. 💞
I love that you are able to identify your struggle but at the same time know your passion and worth! Thank you for sharing! We are blessed by you! ❤️
I’m a 9 and found your channel and am so thankful for you putting yourself out there and bring so transparent. This channel has helped me learn about myself sooo much more! Thank you so much!! ❤️
I love this! Thank you for sharing!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Wow. I never realized that is what I am doing, but I absolutely have that sloth come out ALL the time! I find myself doing pointless things for hours to avoid the work I know I need to be getting done. I have had to delete all games on my phone, because it is so easy for me to just "take a break" and start on the task I need to do later. And then it's 3 hours later... oops. Your insights into this are eye opening, and I am going to start working to grow in this area today! (As soon as I quit procrastinating from work by watching all of your videos haha)
Omg! I laughed so hard at the end of your comment! Priceless! 😄
Oh my goodness this is so accurate for me! 😂
❤️❤️❤️
I love and appreciate your channel!
Thank you. This means so much to me! ❤️
Oh, can I relate! My own UA-cam channel (last video, 5 years ago?) is just one example. I found this video really helpful. Thank you.
I needed this video! Thank you so much
I'm so glad!
I call it Productive Procrastination
😂 love that!
Just listening to this video made me weep. I have been thinking for a while that I am a type 2 but after listening to this I feel there is not doubt that I am a type 9. Thank you so much for what you are doing. It's amazing how God is using you to make a difference.
Awwww you’re so welcome ❤️❤️❤️
I have notoced that it was so difficult to see that I am a type 9w1so/sx, that these videos are very helpful, they clarify nineness, I can relate thing that I see in my own life too.
👋🏻 Literally my life
Needed this so much. I write music and have some things up here but never really tried I think, because of everything you said 💞🙌🏼💞
You got this! Love that you write music!
This was really transparent and good. Thanks for being brave, this can touch many lives❤️
Thank you! ❤️
Had no idea this video would be exactly what I needed for the season I am in life. It spoke prophetically ❤️
❤ Loved this! I am also a 9
Thank you for your videos! I just discovered them and Im glad you followed what God placed in your heart :) greetings from Mexico
Yay! You are so welcome!❤❤❤
I definitely think my younger brother is a 9. He's been wanting to learn photography for a long time, but he struggles with actually getting started with it. I'm a 3, but I do see myself going towards a 9 in stress cause I will stay busy doing other things, rather than what I should actually be doing.
It’s so hard to get started. The struggle is real. But it’s so worth it when we do!
I think you are amazing and you are my favorite Enneagram coach! It does break my heart a little every time you give me a glimpse into 9's. My former husband is a 9 and to see a little nside of what made him tick makes me uncomfortable. Definitely some problems could have been dealt with better if only I had known all of this earlier. I don't think you mention the tri-type often if any but I am pretty sure I am a 739 and I can see at certain points the 9ness in some things I do...particularly remodeling my bedroom...This project was started at least in the planning stages BEFORE you were supposed to start a youtube channel. I hve started but the task seems daunting...too big especially for someone who does not like working alone. I'm also indecisive about color schemes. I will decide definitely and then change my mind...sigh
Your are the SWEETEST! Thank you! I haven’t taught on Tri-Types but that’s awesome you know yours! I’m a 972.
Excellent video I relate in ALL ways lol😂
Thanks! 😅❤
Very useful learning about a type 9 from a type 9.
Awesome! Thanks!
I am definitely a nine and I think my subtype is SP. Not sure about my wing yet…I’m new at this. Now reading a book called Enneagram for Spiritual Formation. By AJ Sherrill
Thankful for your 'talks' :) My husband and I are retired (over 65yo) I'm a 9w8 and he's an 8w7. Now that he's home most of the time and we do most things together, I'm finding it difficult to always give into his little demands (which is a bad habit I started when 'we' home schooled our 6 children)...While he was the sole bread-winner and I was home all day with the kids, he'd come home and expect the work-world to match how we do things at home.
I was pregnant and nursing babies for 17 years straight.
Can you imagine caring for 6 children under 12 and educating them as a 9?
I used lots of charts and checklists :D
Anyway, do you have any videos about relationships between a 9w8 and an 8w7?
Thanks for your help ♥
Wow. Thanks for sharing. I have a few videos with my husband who is a type 9. Also we have another channel (travel channel @vancaskeys) and you get a great look at a marriage between myself (type 9) and my husband (type 8) 😃
What’s the best way to discover your passion?
This is frustrating because I get 5w4 or 5w6 but I relate to this and 9w1 is always near by my results.
Same. I get 4/5, but now I start to think it's more like 1w9 or 9w1
Most probably not 9, but...For me sloth is like giving up. From my childhood I had the same saying "I can never do it". (When learning or trying something new) So why even try?
Grown up, and still don't know what I really want and what my purpose is. No real talents, and comfort zone is so comfy.
✋🏼 YES! I relate. Thank you for making this-I really needed to hear this.
You’re so welcome! ❤️❤️❤️
Great video. Truth! This applies to everyone. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you! Yes! It can apply to everyone! ❤️
THANK YOU FOR THIS CHANNEL.
I don’t think all T9’s have your energy level. I think you’re definitely on the higher end.
You are correct. I’m a social subtype and they have more burst of energy. ❤️
This hits me at my innermost. What about someone who has repressed their purpose for so long that they don’t know what it is. It’s probably why I’m so depressed. How do I connect with my purpose again?
That’s a huge issue with 9s. I have a newer video that helps 9s with this. Here’s the link ua-cam.com/video/N-VKlTCcXoM/v-deo.html -thanks for sharing! ❤️