All the "reasons to buy" you have mentioned at the beginning remind me all of the reasons to drink alcohol. Especially the mood - any mood is a good reason to drink. If you happy, if you sad, if you want to celebrate, meet with family or friends, you had a bad day at work or you had a good day at work.... Absolutely anything and everything is a good reason. That only proves to me that both of those behaviours, shopping and drinking, could be the same thing - an addiction.
That's so true! I've been sober for almost 5 years. Was a bingedrinker before that, since I went out a lot with different groups of friends every weekend. 😂 I think the pandemic (and maybe getting older) made me realize I didn't need alcohol to form meaningful connections with people, even if it was for leisure or expanding my network. Also, I feel like being sober helped me lose weight, so I'm never going back to that lifestyle. 😂
I've been binging your videos for a couple of weeks and it's been really eye opening on a lot of levels. I actually don't even shop that much but there's so many insightful observations here that I haven't come across before anywhere else. it's really changed the way I look at predatory marketing and made me a more conscious consumer. thank you for doing this experiment and sharing your thoughts with us!
I like the concept of "joy per use" sm!! Also I love wearing old clothes as they carry many memories. I really wasn't into fashion and styling until the pandemic hit. I treated my clothes as uniforms -- they were mostly basics, and even if they were quite old and few, nothing really got neglected. I wore everything to death (but some of them are still alive even after 10+ years lol). Now I still wear them at home, or for quick errands. I also lost weight, so my bigger pants have been given away or donated. I'm happy I can still wear my super old knitwear and sweatshirts even if they're now two sizes larger. 😂 I guess I should thank my younger and smarter self -- she was boring, but at least she was practical with her choices. 😂
You have no idea how timely your video is. You just saved me from spending $220 on cologne when I still own cologne I haven’t used. Giving my head a shake! Thank you.
Ooh! Happy to be of service - perfume/cologne is actually something I'll probably never buy again, incidentally! I didn't plan to stop tolerating scented products, but that's my new reality, and will probably save a lot of money in the process, that stuff can be expensive! 😅
I really don’t know anyone that well that I can predict what the perfect gift is. I actually rarely receive a gift that hits a home run. I end up giving it to charity. So…a cash gift it is..always the right size and right colour.
Well here in New Zealand we have inherited the whole black Friday shopping push. It used to be just one day an actual black Friday the 13th. This year it has lasted weeks and weeks of these sales and deals and constant ads. I should also add here in nz we also have inherited the Halloween and valentine traditions encouraging spending! I am 57 and there was no Halloween in my childhood. I really enjoy your videos. I recently decluttered my clothes and I record each item i purchase. Goal is to be a more conscious consumer in 2025. I'm reading suffocation and the curated closet. Best wishes to you and your family.
I think it says something important when a channel has very little to do with your own actual experience and yet you find that channel so central to your outlook on life in general and morality in particular!
Maybe try making a tablet sleeve from clothes that would be discarded? :) Some clothes are not in good enough condition to donate and a lot of donations go to landfills anyway (or to "charities" where they are being sent overseas to be useless trash to other people). If you dont own needle and tread you can buy some threads that make you happy in a secondhand store, if you have that nearby :) If you can get over it not looking "factory made" or "perfect" its really fulfilling! You get to learn lots of neat skills through reusing and mending, and you have lovely memories attached to the items as opposed to buying new. 🌻
If we're looking at an object and pure financials... recipients may receive less "value" monetarily. But... I think it's more about the ritual of gift exchange. If someone Josie's to gift someone something, that is special. If the person really doesn't want it, it can go to charity or someone else who does want it.
6:23 Scroogenomics - A bit of correction, it's an orgy of value destruction, not inflation. Waldfogel focuses on Xmas gift giving, not people buying things for themselves on Black Friday sales, which would be a separate topic. An average of 20% of value is lost when you survey gift recipients about how much their gift cost and how much they'd pay for it themselves. For example, if you received a $100 sweater but you'd only pay $80 for it, you can consider it 20% value lost (i.e. recipient is better off simply receiving $100 in cash). If you absolutely hate the sweater and wouldn't pay anything for it, it's 100% lost value (worst case scenario). On average, it's 20%. This is an ENORMOUS waste considering how much gift giving takes place in this season across the globe. Things are especially bad if the gift giver doesn't have frequent contact with the recipient (grandparents/uncles/aunts to kids) where value loss average is super high, like 50%. The recipient would be much better off if they simply received gift cards (if cash is stigmatized in your family/culture).
Thank you! Clearly my communication on this idea didn't make it out of my head very accurately, I was trying to refer to gift-giving as a part of this Black-Friday shopping extravaganza since in my estimation, many people use the sales to shop for gifts for others as well. And my personal interpretation of the "result" of when value is destroyed, is that the prices we pay for gifts are therefore inflated from the actual resulting value for the recipient. But I didn't do a good job of explaining the source in this case, that's for sure! Appreciate your being here for the necessary clarifications 🫡
meh, sometimes the act of buying itself is the dopamine i wanted, to cheer me up. that's why sometimes i put off making necessary, boring purchases until i have a bad day. so that the little jolt from buying something can improve my mood. i'd also argue that in some cases, purchasing an item can lead to many more hours of experience than buying an experience can. if i go to the movies for example, that experience doesn't last as long as a bag of bath salts will, or a new kindle, etc etc.
I still have an iPhone 11 and I don’t have any issues with it. I considered upgrading to “treat” myself but there’s no reason for me to. I travelled all the way to Mongolia with this iPhone and had no issues with the functionality the whole time, so I figured if it worked perfectly fine in rural Mongolia I don’t need a new phone 😂
Omigosh thank you for sharing about putting away the money you saved in a sale to actual savings. Such a fantastic idea and I just put a bunch of money into savings because of it.
The FOMO about party i dont agree with. The people who you go with could ditch you, you risk here in Norway to freeze and dont come home safe due to crazy expensive taxi and when people are intoxicated you risk false connection. Meaning, the stuff shared and connected at a party could create a false sense of connection and community only to fade and be nonsense while the daylight comes back. Be careful with making friends on parties where they are intoxicated.
Maybe an alcohol-free party! By party I meant more like a "gathering of friends at someone's house" - I'm old now so most of my "parties" don't involve that much alcohol 🙃
For me, I’ve had to learn how to lean in to the FOMO of doing something/socializing, because often going ends up being a betrayal of my actual needs. Especially if you are neurodivergent or chronically ill, FOMO isn’t the best reason to do something.
Yes - I should've maybe had a disclaimer there that in general I don't support FOMO but if we are going to give into that, I'd rather it be for something that will actually help our well-being (and for some people, it might be that human connection, for others, not!)
I do remember buying things, possibly because I buy odd things. I bought a t-shirt on eBay about 12 years ago. The vendor wrote to check measurements carefully “…because it REALLY IS VAST, honestly, it’s just so BIG” - which is why I got an authentic Yves St Laurent top in my size (plus size but really not that vast) for £5. Or the lip balms that my husband bought while I chose the flavours. I can choose each night which flavour I want, which feels luxurious (Crazy Rumors is the brand). There’s the kimono I bought as it was listed as cotton, but turned out not to be. I got my £2 back (it was secondhand) and I was going to take it to the charity shop, when I noticed it shedding. It would get made into rags if I donated it. So I wear it, pick up the threads afterwards, and wonder how many wears I have left before it falls to bits. My no buy November has been easy for the most part. The best bit was decluttering 60 T-shirts. What I’ve really learned is that shopping isn’t a problem - hoarding is. My husband has missed me getting parcels and having fun trying things on. The charities have missed out on my money. I just need to buy more intentionally, and to declutter more than I buy. Thank you for your wonderful analysis of all aspects of consumerism.
So I did buy 2 Christmas gifts this black Friday, which I feel fine about. But, I almost bought (honestly still tempted) another of a pair of shoes that I already have and love. They are white leather with rhinestones in star patterns on the side. I love these shoes, but since they are white, they get dirty and don't look their best faster than other shoes. These shoes were on sale for $100 (I originally paid $120 for them, on sale from full price $200), which was 50% off. Plus, my credit card was offering 18x the miles on purchases from Macy's, effectively meaning an 18% further discount, so effectively $82. I had just been planning to get the shoes professionally cleaned, as my efforts to clean them myself were coming up a little short. I was really tempted to re-purchase, but decided to just take them to a local shoe repair to have them cleaned. The cleaning cost was $35! I decided it was still worth it, but honestly, barely. At a little under half the cost to replace, was it really worth it to clean vs. buying new? I wonder if you've talked about this on any of your videos. As I get a little more money and am able to buy nicer stuff, now I don't want to just replace my stuff. I want to clean it, repair it. I have a cashmere poncho that was expensive and I recently discovered a whole in it. I will be attempting to repair it myself and if I can't, taking it in to a professional. But, at what point is something worth trying to fix or clean, vs. just buying a new one?
Not sure I've addressed this specifically yet, but I will! If not in Dec, in January. It IS a bit of a conundrum sometimes especially with "cheaper" items (for example when a $10 t-shirt gets stained, how hard do we work to remove the stain? should we even be buying $10 t-shirts, if it means someone gets short-changed in the supply process?) I think it does depend on so many factors. But these days, my question is "do these genuinely still have use in them"? I'm currently very reluctant to throw out or donate something that someone can still use, because I don't want these still-usable things to go to landfill. It might cost to get something cleaned or repaired, yes, but it does save the environmental cost of throwing it away. I also feel like we are so used to seeing new things everywhere that the look of a "worn shoe" is something we should re-normalize 😄
Conscious consumer win this year. I've waited... sooo long to bring Mario Kart back into my life. 2 years ago the cost was $400 plus the game cost. This year it is $250 for both. Ahhhhhhh. Nintendo will bring out another platform but I'll be fine with what I have. I also thought I needed more glass storage containers (like was mentioned in the video), but I decluttered and cleaned nearly my whole kitchen today (almost there; phew), and realized that no, I don't. Thanks for the extra support.
This time of year is fraught with temptation! Does setting a buying limit ahead of time help? Does deciding on an experience ( a trip or visit?) rather than presents? Fore warned is fore armed!
A very simple reason not to buy could be that the deals are meh 😂 I just watched the videos by Social Symone and Daniel Owens. And for me personally, I decided not to buy some product categories until it's some time into next year.
Yes, absolutely! I saw Symone's too, I hadn't heard of Daniel before but I'll go check him out! If we make a new tradition of avoiding the "scam of Black Friday" that might actually be great!
@@Alexas.nobuyyear Daniel makes videos about gaming GPUs so that might be an area where our bubbles don't overlap. I finally saw some big discounts in a bicycle online shop but that was for many, but mainly very specific items.
If we/you feel the need for ‘treats’ maybe do some hard looking at lifestyle or community to unwind the conditions that are having us ‘need’ a ‘treat’. Seems like that need is designed by consumerist culture. Maybe no treats - except for puppy training - are needed in a neighborhood that is functioning well.
That is one aspect. But think of people with high-stress jobs. I'm not one of them, most days lol, but I imagine a lot of nurses, doctors, social workers, or even people in public-facing jobs who get treated really poorly, may find temporary solace in "treats". Empathy is not always available where it should be. Our culture is a shambles in many aspects. Not all. But enough that it makes sense that even reasonable people make consumerist mistakes. And then there are all the traumatized people without good health insurance who can't afford therapy or counseling, but can afford, at least momentarily, to buy themselves some distraction from that fact. It's dysfunctional for sure, but now that the billionaires have a firm grasp, there isn't much to be done x it would take a universal strike/class warfare.
Haha not sure I will address in a video so in case I don't, I'll tell you here - I got a request to remove the cardboard boxes, so I have, and so it opened up room for something else - those frames have my kids' Korean names in them. They might not be permanent but they're there for now 😄
All the "reasons to buy" you have mentioned at the beginning remind me all of the reasons to drink alcohol. Especially the mood - any mood is a good reason to drink. If you happy, if you sad, if you want to celebrate, meet with family or friends, you had a bad day at work or you had a good day at work.... Absolutely anything and everything is a good reason. That only proves to me that both of those behaviours, shopping and drinking, could be the same thing - an addiction.
Whoah -cool insight!
Unhealthy food, too! Celebrating? Have cake! Miserable? Have chocolate!
That's so true!
I've been sober for almost 5 years. Was a bingedrinker before that, since I went out a lot with different groups of friends every weekend. 😂 I think the pandemic (and maybe getting older) made me realize I didn't need alcohol to form meaningful connections with people, even if it was for leisure or expanding my network. Also, I feel like being sober helped me lose weight, so I'm never going back to that lifestyle. 😂
I've been binging your videos for a couple of weeks and it's been really eye opening on a lot of levels. I actually don't even shop that much but there's so many insightful observations here that I haven't come across before anywhere else. it's really changed the way I look at predatory marketing and made me a more conscious consumer. thank you for doing this experiment and sharing your thoughts with us!
Ditto
I love bingeing her content too but it seems to be having a reverse psychology effect, as I’ve bought a lot recently 😂
🥰
I like the concept of "joy per use" sm!! Also I love wearing old clothes as they carry many memories. I really wasn't into fashion and styling until the pandemic hit. I treated my clothes as uniforms -- they were mostly basics, and even if they were quite old and few, nothing really got neglected. I wore everything to death (but some of them are still alive even after 10+ years lol). Now I still wear them at home, or for quick errands. I also lost weight, so my bigger pants have been given away or donated. I'm happy I can still wear my super old knitwear and sweatshirts even if they're now two sizes larger. 😂 I guess I should thank my younger and smarter self -- she was boring, but at least she was practical with her choices. 😂
You have no idea how timely your video is. You just saved me from spending $220 on cologne when I still own cologne I haven’t used. Giving my head a shake! Thank you.
Ooh! Happy to be of service - perfume/cologne is actually something I'll probably never buy again, incidentally! I didn't plan to stop tolerating scented products, but that's my new reality, and will probably save a lot of money in the process, that stuff can be expensive! 😅
I really don’t know anyone that well that I can predict what the perfect gift is. I actually rarely receive a gift that hits a home run. I end up giving it to charity. So…a cash gift it is..always the right size and right colour.
Well here in New Zealand we have inherited the whole black Friday shopping push. It used to be just one day an actual black Friday the 13th. This year it has lasted weeks and weeks of these sales and deals and constant ads. I should also add here in nz we also have inherited the Halloween and valentine traditions encouraging spending! I am 57 and there was no Halloween in my childhood. I really enjoy your videos. I recently decluttered my clothes and I record each item i purchase. Goal is to be a more conscious consumer in 2025. I'm reading suffocation and the curated closet. Best wishes to you and your family.
Sad to hear that consumerism is taking over! It's a big yeah...nah
I think it says something important when a channel has very little to do with your own actual experience and yet you find that channel so central to your outlook on life in general and morality in particular!
Maybe try making a tablet sleeve from clothes that would be discarded? :) Some clothes are not in good enough condition to donate and a lot of donations go to landfills anyway (or to "charities" where they are being sent overseas to be useless trash to other people). If you dont own needle and tread you can buy some threads that make you happy in a secondhand store, if you have that nearby :) If you can get over it not looking "factory made" or "perfect" its really fulfilling! You get to learn lots of neat skills through reusing and mending, and you have lovely memories attached to the items as opposed to buying new. 🌻
love the idea of crafting something!
If we're looking at an object and pure financials... recipients may receive less "value" monetarily. But... I think it's more about the ritual of gift exchange. If someone Josie's to gift someone something, that is special. If the person really doesn't want it, it can go to charity or someone else who does want it.
6:23 Scroogenomics - A bit of correction, it's an orgy of value destruction, not inflation. Waldfogel focuses on Xmas gift giving, not people buying things for themselves on Black Friday sales, which would be a separate topic. An average of 20% of value is lost when you survey gift recipients about how much their gift cost and how much they'd pay for it themselves.
For example, if you received a $100 sweater but you'd only pay $80 for it, you can consider it 20% value lost (i.e. recipient is better off simply receiving $100 in cash). If you absolutely hate the sweater and wouldn't pay anything for it, it's 100% lost value (worst case scenario). On average, it's 20%. This is an ENORMOUS waste considering how much gift giving takes place in this season across the globe.
Things are especially bad if the gift giver doesn't have frequent contact with the recipient (grandparents/uncles/aunts to kids) where value loss average is super high, like 50%. The recipient would be much better off if they simply received gift cards (if cash is stigmatized in your family/culture).
Thank you! Clearly my communication on this idea didn't make it out of my head very accurately, I was trying to refer to gift-giving as a part of this Black-Friday shopping extravaganza since in my estimation, many people use the sales to shop for gifts for others as well. And my personal interpretation of the "result" of when value is destroyed, is that the prices we pay for gifts are therefore inflated from the actual resulting value for the recipient. But I didn't do a good job of explaining the source in this case, that's for sure!
Appreciate your being here for the necessary clarifications 🫡
This was a really needed video for alot of people. Thanks for taking the time to make such a gem. ❤
Thank you!
meh, sometimes the act of buying itself is the dopamine i wanted, to cheer me up. that's why sometimes i put off making necessary, boring purchases until i have a bad day. so that the little jolt from buying something can improve my mood. i'd also argue that in some cases, purchasing an item can lead to many more hours of experience than buying an experience can. if i go to the movies for example, that experience doesn't last as long as a bag of bath salts will, or a new kindle, etc etc.
I've seen this tip before, about saving "boring purchases" for those times of just wanting to buy something! If it works, that's great!
I still have an iPhone 11 and I don’t have any issues with it. I considered upgrading to “treat” myself but there’s no reason for me to. I travelled all the way to Mongolia with this iPhone and had no issues with the functionality the whole time, so I figured if it worked perfectly fine in rural Mongolia I don’t need a new phone 😂
Omigosh thank you for sharing about putting away the money you saved in a sale to actual savings. Such a fantastic idea and I just put a bunch of money into savings because of it.
The FOMO about party i dont agree with. The people who you go with could ditch you, you risk here in Norway to freeze and dont come home safe due to crazy expensive taxi and when people are intoxicated you risk false connection. Meaning, the stuff shared and connected at a party could create a false sense of connection and community only to fade and be nonsense while the daylight comes back. Be careful with making friends on parties where they are intoxicated.
Maybe an alcohol-free party! By party I meant more like a "gathering of friends at someone's house" - I'm old now so most of my "parties" don't involve that much alcohol 🙃
For me, I’ve had to learn how to lean in to the FOMO of doing something/socializing, because often going ends up being a betrayal of my actual needs. Especially if you are neurodivergent or chronically ill, FOMO isn’t the best reason to do something.
Yes - I should've maybe had a disclaimer there that in general I don't support FOMO but if we are going to give into that, I'd rather it be for something that will actually help our well-being (and for some people, it might be that human connection, for others, not!)
I do remember buying things, possibly because I buy odd things. I bought a t-shirt on eBay about 12 years ago. The vendor wrote to check measurements carefully “…because it REALLY IS VAST, honestly, it’s just so BIG” - which is why I got an authentic Yves St Laurent top in my size (plus size but really not that vast) for £5.
Or the lip balms that my husband bought while I chose the flavours. I can choose each night which flavour I want, which feels luxurious (Crazy Rumors is the brand). There’s the kimono I bought as it was listed as cotton, but turned out not to be. I got my £2 back (it was secondhand) and I was going to take it to the charity shop, when I noticed it shedding. It would get made into rags if I donated it. So I wear it, pick up the threads afterwards, and wonder how many wears I have left before it falls to bits.
My no buy November has been easy for the most part. The best bit was decluttering 60 T-shirts. What I’ve really learned is that shopping isn’t a problem - hoarding is. My husband has missed me getting parcels and having fun trying things on. The charities have missed out on my money. I just need to buy more intentionally, and to declutter more than I buy.
Thank you for your wonderful analysis of all aspects of consumerism.
Did the supposedly vast t-shirt make it through the declutter? 😄
@ it did! It fits me perfectly and it’s good quality. I’ve worn it many times and it doesn’t seem to look old or worn.
So I did buy 2 Christmas gifts this black Friday, which I feel fine about. But, I almost bought (honestly still tempted) another of a pair of shoes that I already have and love. They are white leather with rhinestones in star patterns on the side. I love these shoes, but since they are white, they get dirty and don't look their best faster than other shoes. These shoes were on sale for $100 (I originally paid $120 for them, on sale from full price $200), which was 50% off. Plus, my credit card was offering 18x the miles on purchases from Macy's, effectively meaning an 18% further discount, so effectively $82. I had just been planning to get the shoes professionally cleaned, as my efforts to clean them myself were coming up a little short. I was really tempted to re-purchase, but decided to just take them to a local shoe repair to have them cleaned. The cleaning cost was $35! I decided it was still worth it, but honestly, barely. At a little under half the cost to replace, was it really worth it to clean vs. buying new? I wonder if you've talked about this on any of your videos. As I get a little more money and am able to buy nicer stuff, now I don't want to just replace my stuff. I want to clean it, repair it. I have a cashmere poncho that was expensive and I recently discovered a whole in it. I will be attempting to repair it myself and if I can't, taking it in to a professional. But, at what point is something worth trying to fix or clean, vs. just buying a new one?
I think the answer is simply who you want to be in the world.
Not sure I've addressed this specifically yet, but I will! If not in Dec, in January. It IS a bit of a conundrum sometimes especially with "cheaper" items (for example when a $10 t-shirt gets stained, how hard do we work to remove the stain? should we even be buying $10 t-shirts, if it means someone gets short-changed in the supply process?)
I think it does depend on so many factors. But these days, my question is "do these genuinely still have use in them"? I'm currently very reluctant to throw out or donate something that someone can still use, because I don't want these still-usable things to go to landfill. It might cost to get something cleaned or repaired, yes, but it does save the environmental cost of throwing it away.
I also feel like we are so used to seeing new things everywhere that the look of a "worn shoe" is something we should re-normalize 😄
I feel that unless you know your friend is open to questions on their spending, it can be tricky to question anyones purchases or wants.
Yes, for sure! That's part of the reason I'm having these discussions with the internet at large, and not people I know in real life too 😅
Conscious consumer win this year. I've waited... sooo long to bring Mario Kart back into my life. 2 years ago the cost was $400 plus the game cost. This year it is $250 for both. Ahhhhhhh. Nintendo will bring out another platform but I'll be fine with what I have.
I also thought I needed more glass storage containers (like was mentioned in the video), but I decluttered and cleaned nearly my whole kitchen today (almost there; phew), and realized that no, I don't.
Thanks for the extra support.
This time of year is fraught with temptation! Does setting a buying limit ahead of time help? Does deciding on an experience ( a trip or visit?) rather than presents? Fore warned is fore armed!
A very simple reason not to buy could be that the deals are meh 😂
I just watched the videos by Social Symone and Daniel Owens.
And for me personally, I decided not to buy some product categories until it's some time into next year.
Yes, absolutely! I saw Symone's too, I hadn't heard of Daniel before but I'll go check him out! If we make a new tradition of avoiding the "scam of Black Friday" that might actually be great!
@@Alexas.nobuyyear Daniel makes videos about gaming GPUs so that might be an area where our bubbles don't overlap.
I finally saw some big discounts in a bicycle online shop but that was for many, but mainly very specific items.
If we/you feel the need for ‘treats’ maybe do some hard looking at lifestyle or community to unwind the conditions that are having us ‘need’ a ‘treat’. Seems like that need is designed by consumerist culture. Maybe no treats - except for puppy training - are needed in a neighborhood that is functioning well.
Haha maybe I'm trying to "train" myself too 🫣
That is one aspect. But think of people with high-stress jobs. I'm not one of them, most days lol, but I imagine a lot of nurses, doctors, social workers, or even people in public-facing jobs who get treated really poorly, may find temporary solace in "treats". Empathy is not always available where it should be. Our culture is a shambles in many aspects. Not all. But enough that it makes sense that even reasonable people make consumerist mistakes.
And then there are all the traumatized people without good health insurance who can't afford therapy or counseling, but can afford, at least momentarily, to buy themselves some distraction from that fact.
It's dysfunctional for sure, but now that the billionaires have a firm grasp, there isn't much to be done x it would take a universal strike/class warfare.
I feel very curious why did those Korean words got placed into the background, and when are you going to address them in a video 👀
Haha not sure I will address in a video so in case I don't, I'll tell you here - I got a request to remove the cardboard boxes, so I have, and so it opened up room for something else - those frames have my kids' Korean names in them. They might not be permanent but they're there for now 😄
I even allow them to text me about the sales… I need help😭
I even allow them to text me about the sales… I need help😭
Opt out! They don't need to have your number 😉