I have actually never truly met a real Christ-centered proverbs 31 woman in my life, including church. Many “Christian” women like to have the title but not the character and the ethic to go along with it. This applies for men also. Wise Christ-Centered people who have a personal relationship with God are extremely rare in general anyways. I am content with my current position. It is better to be single than to be with someone who is not truly Christ centered.
Absolutely guys. The funny thing is that when I see the ladies and the men who do that, I'm already thinking "But a Proverbs 31 woman or Ephesians 5 man won't PARADE or ANNOUNCE who they are." It exudes from them. People will praise her or him instead of him/her doing it herself. And that's already a general trait that Christians should have. Proverbs says that we should let others praise us and not with our own lips. And also (NT) do things and live out our lives as unto the Lord and not unto men. I know, Proverbs 31 and Ephesians 5 men ARE RARE to find...but the comfort I have to remind myself is that they are NOT EXTINCT. Be encouraged brothers!
it doesn't say husbands submit to your wives ...what bible do you have? read I peter 3... Adam listened to Eve in the garden and that was why we were to submit to their authority however, they are to lead and nurture us and love as as Christ loves the church. Please do not put your own thoughts on scripture :(
I’ve just realized that the guy I’m communicating with has all these 3 qualities!!! And I’ve never considered him as someone more than a friend before🤦♀️ thanks Mark for emphasizing on something more important than looks 👏🏼
Strong work ethics: I work 50+ hours per week making $100k - 150k per year. This is definitely over-looked, but it kept the wrong women away from me. Good listener: I don't talk much either, but I focus my eyes & attention on the woman I'm chatting with. Definitely a trait that took me some time to develop. Hint: put your cell phone away & keep it off. You're welcome. Lol I am totally the nice guy who has been rejected and finished last dozens of times. Again, shielded by God from meeting the wrong women in my life. I finally put on some muscle mass, instead of being scrawny, and a genuine Christian women finally noticed me. We're good friends now, and in the verge of making it official for Courting/Dating. Great insight, Mark. Blessings to you & all who put their trust in God, while simultaneously putting in the effort to be active in their faith.
@Herzio money doesnt bring you into heaven rather away from it. What shall a man profit if he gains the whole world and loses his own soul. I personally cant understand why it should be so important to a born again christian to earn 100k-150k a year. I myself have about 30k and it is totaly enough. I think instead of getting more and more money we should be interested in sanctification of our live by obeing Jesus and going, for example preaching the gospel.
Man I was afraid I'd be a terrible father and a bad husband but all of this describes me. If I stay true to God and myself like I have been I'll make an awesome husband and king to my future queen❤💯 thank you for this.
The society we live in today is sexualised in a big way, admittedly I must have watched 50 or more videos on dating, day game and getting instant dates by being someone I'm not. I decided to understand Gods will for me and to follow that with the commandments he has set. I fell so much better for being myself. I love my Job currently as I get to change lives by helping the less fortunate. Thank you for the informative video :). God Bless !!
Holy Moley... I've found him! Hard working, kind, great listener. I was content being single and God spoke to me one random day and said, "I have someone for you. " He said it over and over again. I wasn't looking for anyone! About a month later, I ran into an acquaintance that I hadn't seen in a couple of years at a funeral of all places. I started chatting him up and he was a little shy toward me. We started talking and we've been together ever since. That was 10 months ago and although we've had ups and downs, I know he's the one God told me about.
The reason there are less Christian men in the church is because brothers aren’t sharing the gospel with them these days and I say brothers because I’ve shared the gospel with guys and things got misconstrued so I’ve come to find that it’s better for guys to hear from men. And in addition I would add some common sense. I dated the nicest guy who was also very naive that it hurt his business/income twice.
You are awesome! Amen, no one is talking about this your videos are done humbly and with good taste! God bless you and your family Mark!🌺Have a blessed day.🙂
I've been single for awhile I am in no rush because I want to find that person with Christian good moral values , easy to get along with , seeks goodness in life every day , plain and simple.......
I met many men with these characters in my early and late 20's but I was such an avoidant woman and overlooked these characters from a man. I asked God to renew my mind and give me wisdom. And now am 31, I have met a man who has the exact qualities you've mentioned. We're already establishing genuine friendship, but he really wants to pursue me to marriage. However, I still have to guard my heart and tell God about him. Am waiting on the LORD. Thank you so much, Mark for this video. Somehow, I am enlightened! May our good God bless you more! Jen from Manila, Philippines.
Witchcraft is against God. Please stop watching Harry Potter it’s got spells you don’t know what these actually means it could be summoning demons! God said sorcerers will go hell. Please stop
Thank you for this. Grew up without a dad and my mom and I never talked about relationships. I am not necessarily a young woman and I'm learning a lot here, thank you🙏🏽💜
I am waiting for a good woman but I am perfectly content being single. Yes I would like a partner/ helper. But we are not from this worldly place. If you could not be blessed with a loving partner here, I'm sure the Lord will bless us when we get there!!!
Where are they at? I'm pretty sure I'm one of them. Problem is, I find women don't notice us as much as they should. My own pastor told me I have very good traits to be a husband, have saved myself for marriage to this day(I'm 25 now), never broke a girls heart etc. The three qualities you described in this video describe me perfectly. But he said to me that sometimes women just don't "see" you sometimes. He gave me a story about a guy who needed to sharpen his "outward" appearance a little bit before he met the woman he married. He said that's not the case with me but that he isn't quite sure yet what kind of sharpening I need to do to be noticed more. He alluded to the possibility of shyness. I do have a habit of running away from a girl if I start to have feelings for her due to being afraid of getting hurt. I wonder if that may be my problem. I've had lots of older women tell me that they cannot understand why or how a guy like me could still be single.
Thank you for the good advice. I am chatty and extroverted. I would worry if I met a quiet guy that I would have most conversation doing 90% of the communicating. I would worry that my passionate extroverted nature would over shadow him. I 100% agree that hard working and kind are very wonderful things in a man. Those things are sadly under rated. Charm, wealth, and good looks only go so far and just are not enough to make a happy life together. You will be miserable with just those to hold love together.
Gibbon I have never met a introvert thats chatty. Are you chatty with everyone or just people you are close to. If you are chatty with everyone, maybe you are not a introvert.
@Gibbon "I mean you shouldn't be judging a person by personality." Are you kidding me? "I'm brutally violent, stingy and unkind. Don't judge me...just sup up my personality and marry me!" Sure thing.
@Gibbon I'm not hating on anyone, I was implying that the comment was bizarre as we all judge. We need to judge to help us make the best possible decisions when it comes to forming relationships.
@Gibbon Hey, no problem and no offence meant or taken! I'm sorry that you are experiencing a season of loneliness and I hope that it will not last much longer. Some people say that these seasons of loneliness (despite the horrid and vacuous feelings that come from it) may prove to be a blessing depending on how you spend the time. Some people may suggest to use this time to form a closer relationship with God. However, I'm aware that there are different reasons leading to loneliness. It could be down to personality type (such as crippling shyness), geographical location, medical condition - just to suggest a few possible causes. Some of these causes are difficult to navigate and overcome. There is definitely a need for human companionship. Even if we feel that we do not want to get married, even if we feel that God has given us the gift of singleness, God created us to be sociable beings and thus we have a longing to form deep, trustworthy and fulfilling relationships. Unfortunately we are living in a time when relationships are fraught with negativity. Evidence of this can be found every time we are informed of current affairs, be they on a local or global level. It's designed to make people to feel psychologically polarised which in turn isolates us from each other. Once confusion sets in, depression may shortly follow and that's why it is so important to always keep close to God. I hope he blesses you soon.
Another thing that I heard over the years as a Christian. If you could find one quality in a person of course after being in a relationship with Christ is that he is able to confess his issues and work on them.
Cheers, Cheers, Cheers! My granddaddy was the quiet type. He went to work everyday even when he was sick. My brothers too! There is nothing wrong with a guy being shy! Smart, shy, nice, quiet, gentleman... those are good qualities to have outside of Spiritual aspect. I don't like the over the top, flashy type, stay in the mirror longer than I would, flamboyant type. That's too much! My granddaddy wasn't loud. My brothers aren't loud. My uncles are not loud either.
I agree with you, Mark, about the work ethic. It's super important to me. I always believed in working HARD no matter what, even if it wasn't my forever job...especially during a recession when I had to take part-time retail work. God sees us putting in the hard work!
I'm one of those odd ball women that are more attracted to the introverted, silent type. My current crush has or exhibits all three of these qualities.
One the second point; always ask "Do you want advice, for me to fix it, or for me to just listen?", at least in a sly way. Trust me. It'll save a lot of trouble in the long run.
Kindness, work ethic and being slow to voice an opinion are definitely dependable qualities I will be looking for. I myself aim for kindness rather than niceness because they're not the same thing. Being "nice" is often weak and spineless, and it also tends to be about your own comfort rather than doing the right thing. Kindness can be confrontational without being mean. Great video.
I met a good Christian guy going out to meet with a group of friends one night outside a bar I told God if that's the guy make it clear to me after I had a really good conversation with this dude who doesn't drink and listened to me talk about my issues for 40 minutes. Last time I saw him he smiled I waved and didn't talk to him because I didn't want to come off as chasing him. I'll maybe see him again.
For some reason in our day and age, people are somewhat suspicious of people are genuinely 'nice' at times. I strongly encourage you to 'Ruth' that up, he made another video about Christian sisters pursuing men, I strongly recommend you check that one out ;) ua-cam.com/video/ZO78FfA6LKY/v-deo.html
Ya both involved in an interesting conversation both good listeners this is how to having a meaningful conversation. I'm surprised by how many people find a hard time just being open and willing to talk about life.
This is really awesome and helpful!!! I’m really praying about my season with my boyfriend, he has all of these qualities and he is a wonderful christian man! I’m just praying for guidance and for God to give me clarity about the future! although sometimes i’m not sure what to think because i’m not sure how to tell if God is 100% speaking to me, but i’m still incredibly happy with my relationship :))
-strong work ethic (goes to work everyday!) not lazy!! -a good listener (not necessarily gonna be a huge talker) -kindness wheeew Lord! Thank you for this is confirmation of what I measured in a guy in the past. lol.
I love this channel😍so helpful, although I was a christian I didn't know how to cope with so many situations, especially in dating, thank you so much, Mark, you're doing an amazing job on UA-cam👏🏼👏🏼😻
lol funny, cause I do have a guy in the friend zone but we both treat each other like siblings, it feels weird...it's like we both would make a great couple but we both just don't have the attraction, it's like if I were to kiss him I would puke hahaah, same thing he says to me 😂, there's just nada feelings of love 😂
RiYiN I'm currently going through a situation with a guy and I don't know what to do about it. I don't know if we're just meant to be friends, something more, or nothing at all!
Honestly, I’m super introverted and WISHED I was more talkative but that’s just not me. Lots of women pass me by without considering getting to know me. It’s very frustrating but when someone told me that every person needs a personality like mine. It made me feel good but for real ladies… This is good.
Welp... 3 for 3, haha. Awesome video yet again! It's interesting you say there's more Christian woman out there, than there are men. I feel like I'm having a hard, hard time finding them it seems.
Did you guys approach any single lady in your church to ask them for a coffee in a friendly way? I mean it is happening a lot even in my church more single women than men and the women are usually saying that they are never approached by anyone and felt unlikable. So maybe because someone isn't fixing themselves they are made out to sound unlikable? Difficult to deal with? If you became a friend at first then things might go from there? In my opinion we cannot be flirting like the world do in a sexual way.
TheComing IsSoon Haha! Funny you should ask... I've been fancying this new woman who I suddenly started noticing at my family church. I believe she's a new member. She's quiet, sits, and keeps to herself. Maybe I'll have to try that someday. And I absolutely agree with you about not flirting like the rest of the world does these days, I've never been that way anyways, it's just not me.
Thank you for this Mark. I'm glad you pointed these traits out. I love watching all of your videos. They are so helpful. I'm praying for my future husband whoever he is.
So true. I looked at the talketive guy. But I would definitely look more, for nice, good listener, great work ethic. I will give him a chance!! Best video ever!! Thanks!!
I love working how can you not? You get a sense of purpose some type of goal to work towards (if you work in projects), it keeps you busy and gives you great confidence when you do well and you get paid on top of that! How can you not like that ? Unless of course you work in a toxic environment.
Actually, at work I am surrounded by such kind of men, they are all married and I do not have a problem with that at all. Just appreciating the fact that those kind of people are just a blessing to be around. As a woman, I am watching and learning.
Not to sound boastful but I posess all three of these qualities. I go to work, am never late and do the best job i can possibly do even though i cant stand my job and am currently looking for a new one. I have been told numerous times that I am a good listener. Theres almost nothing i enjoy more than a good deep conversation. I am that guy in the room thats being quite and generally just minding his own business. I am kind. I will never be just blatantly unkind to someone. Im a firm believer in the golden rule and i give everyone a chance. Just dont try to tale advantage of me or betray my trust. I am also the guy that has been single his entire life. I have been looking for my intended for over two decades. I just pray that I find her soon because honestly, im tired. Im tired of the hurt and the loneliness. And im tired of the search and nothing but rejections. While I agree these are three great qualities for anyone to have they havent helped me find my bride or love.
Any decent man can be all these things and still not be the one. The highest standard is that he has a personal relationship with God and lives for him first. Shame there are more Christian women than Christian men though. I will probably never get married just because there isn't anyone available! I'm not going to say that I'm not upset at this prospect, but I commit it to God and ask Him to fill my heart. I'd love to be married but I'm content being single if that is God's will.
I would agree. It is very hard to find a man these days that have a strong work ethic, a man that is a good listener, and a man that is kind and gentle. I know there are that have these qualities but its really rare to find.
Excellent advise Mark, on all 3 point! The first one, on work ethic, is very true...it's not in style as it should be, I'm afraid. However, I have found both extremes-the individual that doesn't want to work and the individual that all that matters to him is work, and ends up neglecting the relationship. I guess both are bad. But your advise is head on. Now all we have to do is put it to practice. The question would be, where are they? LOL!? 🤔🤔🤔🤓😊 With that said Mark, let me ask you a question, if I may. A friend of mine made a comment once that made me wonder if true. She said that Christian men are hard to find because they are sooo scared of falling into sexual temptation that they go and stay away from dating altogether. Basically, they hide. Since you are a counselor and I'm sure there are many personal stories you have heard, do you think there may be truth to this?
I think that's true sometimes but I probably wouldn't say it's the main reason there are less Christian guys. I think a lot of Christian guys are scared of women bc they don't want to fail at "winning" her and they don't want to be rejected. I also think there are genuinely more Christian women in America. There are many reasons for this, but my guess is bc the church has lost the meaning of true masculinity many times and doesn't know how to speak to an man's heart and true desires.
Ephesians 5 man and his Proverbs 31 woman. I didn't have good male role models, maternally but my daddy and his brothers were that, and that's what I lean on.
Hi Mark! This is one of my favorite videos on your channel that I've watched so far! The guy I like is 15, so he doesn't have a job yet, *but* he works out and pushes himself hard. He is probably a great listener too! He doesn't talk a whole lot and I'm still getting to know him, but if God wanted us together in the future, he seems like that kind of person. The guy I like is also very kind and honorable towards others! He held the door open for me when I left church on Tuesday, and is just nice in general and smiles whenever he sees me. If only now God will answer my prayers that he is the one for me! 🙏
If he doesn't have a job maybe get to know what he is like academically because the academic life precedes work life. Does he perform without complaining? Does he work to maintain good grades or better his grades? etc. He sounds like a great guy.
@@ayabongazungu4041 He has been offered several jobs now that he is 16. I don't go to school with him so I don't know, but I bet he has great grades! And yes, he is a blessing from God.
For a balanced picture of someone it’s important to consider the good and not so good sides and evaluate the characteristics as a whole like how bad is the bad and how great is the good stuff!
There are more women in general. I do agree there is an aversion to the “nice guy” or “forgiving.” I think the need for instant gratification doesn’t allow for important elements such as trust to be established. Also some of the events in main stream media and family courts has caused discouragement. I believe many need to be reminded that God also brings healing from very deep wounds, forgiveness of sins, and rest for the heavily laden.
PS---Pastor, the reason SOME PEOPLE (UNGRATEFUL WOMEN) don't value hard-working me, is because THEY DON'T WORK AS HARD! Guess what? THEY'RE NOT GONNA THINK IT'S CUTE WHEN THEY ARE BOTH sleeping outside or being put down because they're applying for food stamps or other government resources! GOD SAYS "IF YOU DO NOT WORK YOU DO NOT EAT" (Acts) Also, "all hard work leads to a profit" (Proverbs)
excellent video Mark... I continue to enjoy being in a season of singleness... have not met a Christ-centred man with these qualities... wish more guys would watch your videos
I agree but from what I seen . I need to chase after what God called me to do. Not trying to look for her. As work - well I had an accident 2 years ago so..... I am on disability & do ok. I take my time now to get better , spend time with God in His presence & practice playing. This time has been a blessing - it's teaching me how to depend on God for everything. It's showing me what is in my heart - pride ( I was taught to take care of myself) . But I have learned over time to really let go. I am being real. Trust me, you don't know what is in your heart until the heat is on. God is faithful to bring me to where He has called me. As for more Christian women - 🤔 where ? I guess I am in the wrong state. 😂
I think the bad rap that nice guys get has to do with the "false nice guys". Such as those who act nice but they put on a front and are not honest and have bad intentions. Unfortunately, when there is a authentic kind man, he can't be trusted because so many fake people also act nice just to you into their trap, such as the stingy man in Proverbs 23
Pastor Mark-this relates to what you said about not wanting a mean guy giving you a hard time when you come home from work. (abt WOMEN and what MEN want in a WIFE) (JUST ONE of the verses about this) Proverbs 21:9
My ex bf has great work ethic and is a nice guy but lacked the listening part..I rather have an understanding man who listens..if you bring up an issue and he gets offended rather than trying to understand you then that is sign.
For the first time my man imma have to disagree with the second point because I am an extrovert I talk to many people but I am also a good listener too
I’m reading some of these comments and they are all about what OTHERS are doing. But are u examining yourselves? Are you doing what the Bible tells you to do? Are u walking the way God has called you to walk? Instead of fussing what others are doing or not doing, are focusing on your actions? Instead of looking at others are or aren’t doing, focus on making you a better you and let God focus on the others.
I agree with you and Miss Priss ;) Examining and judging the others its a bad idea and definitely NOT the Christian attitude ! The letter to St. Joseph for future husband is a better one :) :D I do not like classify people to real/not real Christian too(it leads to selfness pride and its seen in the comments here like :' IM super truly Christ centered person and others are not and its better to be single because other people are not enough wise Christ-centered ' - wait what ! :O ). They are people who simply follow the Christ, and who are against Him regardless what they are saying and thinking about themselves( they are false prophets and many will be suprised at the end) . .
I just want to say thanks for all these videos and bless you and your marriage as well as your life. May God bless your marriage so much and all of you reading my post in Jesus' almighty name. Amen. Lots of love❤
I work very hard every single day at my job knowing I have a very hard time trying a little bit and bringing Jesus into my life that he can help me out when I'm at work and I need to do this more is bringing Jesus into my life I am still working on myself for being a Christian and my papa helps me all the time and gives me stuff that I need to know about being Christian
I really appreciate your ministry. Although I am in a different season of life, I still listen so I can increase in knowledge and wisdom. I know its truth because its biblically based, but I also have the benefit of looking back because I have lived a lot of it. Thank you for your obedience.
Sorry I just have to point out, that all the women out here just because there’s a lot of us and less Christian men, doesn’t mean that if you have faith it won’t happen because if you have faith in God our Father, he can make massive miracles happen by spirit. All we have to do is build in faith and trust the Lord completely and give our lives to him. Hallelujah Lord in the name of Jesus and by the Holy Spirit. Amen.
About the work ethic, I thought going to work was something "normal" that everybody does. But believe me it surprised me how many young adults nowadays are trying to avoid work.
Do you have a video on the difference between testing godly fruits vs just beginning plain judgmental & having too much of a high unrealistic standard?
This time is soooo into chasing "highs"...that truly scares me. It encourages people to irresponibility and not to value faithfulness and commitment. Feels like people are encouraged to follow every crazy idea they get as if it automatically was their divine calling. And now they were just asked to take the "leap of faith" to fulfill their dreams...I value men with common sense and a sense of responsibility way more.
Great advice! 1. Good work ethic 2. Great listener 3. Kindness 👏👏👏
I have actually never truly met a real Christ-centered proverbs 31 woman in my life, including church. Many “Christian” women like to have the title but not the character and the ethic to go along with it. This applies for men also. Wise Christ-Centered people who have a personal relationship with God are extremely rare in general anyways. I am content with my current position. It is better to be single than to be with someone who is not truly Christ centered.
Robert Medve -- I have experienced this myself, typically, these same women have a problem with Ephesians 5, women submitting to their husbands.
Absolutely guys. The funny thing is that when I see the ladies and the men who do that, I'm already thinking "But a Proverbs 31 woman or Ephesians 5 man won't PARADE or ANNOUNCE who they are." It exudes from them. People will praise her or him instead of him/her doing it herself. And that's already a general trait that Christians should have. Proverbs says that we should let others praise us and not with our own lips. And also (NT) do things and live out our lives as unto the Lord and not unto men. I know, Proverbs 31 and Ephesians 5 men ARE RARE to find...but the comfort I have to remind myself is that they are NOT EXTINCT. Be encouraged brothers!
Robert Medve so true
The Bible goes on to say Husbands submit to your Wife's and listen to what she has to say.
it doesn't say husbands submit to your wives ...what bible do you have? read I peter 3... Adam listened to Eve in the garden and that was why we were to submit to their authority however, they are to lead and nurture us and love as as Christ loves the church. Please do not put your own thoughts on scripture :(
I’ve just realized that the guy I’m communicating with has all these 3 qualities!!! And I’ve never considered him as someone more than a friend before🤦♀️ thanks Mark for emphasizing on something more important than looks 👏🏼
Ohhhhh Matchmaker Mark
We are in the same boat! 🤣🤣🤣
I've been immature. I need to repent from not appreciating this gift in my life.
You still wont date him 🤣🤣🤣
|!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~
|!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~
Strong work ethics:
I work 50+ hours per week making $100k - 150k per year. This is definitely over-looked, but it kept the wrong women away from me.
Good listener:
I don't talk much either, but I focus my eyes & attention on the woman I'm chatting with. Definitely a trait that took me some time to develop.
Hint: put your cell phone away & keep it off. You're welcome. Lol
I am totally the nice guy who has been rejected and finished last dozens of times. Again, shielded by God from meeting the wrong women in my life.
I finally put on some muscle mass, instead of being scrawny, and a genuine Christian women finally noticed me. We're good friends now, and in the verge of making it official for Courting/Dating.
Great insight, Mark.
Blessings to you & all who put their trust in God, while simultaneously putting in the effort to be active in their faith.
Venancio Rodriguez Thats great....hope it works out!
I admire your work ethic brother. Inspirational.
Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you. God's way is the best way, as hard as it may seem at the time.
@Herzio money doesnt bring you into heaven rather away from it.
What shall a man profit if he gains the whole world and loses his own soul.
I personally cant understand why it should be so important to a born again christian to earn 100k-150k a year.
I myself have about 30k and it is totaly enough.
I think instead of getting more and more money we should be interested in sanctification of our live by obeing Jesus and going, for example preaching the gospel.
@Herzio it just between you and God.
Value the nice guy! 👏🏼👏🏼 nice guys often finish last very true, but I’d rather be last than with a crazy controlling manipulative woman.
Agreed!
I know I'm late to the party lol but this is a very underrated comment.
Sbentsen27, did you watch wong fu's nice guys finish last?
@@joseheredia9275 no i haven't seen it
So true
Man I was afraid I'd be a terrible father and a bad husband but all of this describes me. If I stay true to God and myself like I have been I'll make an awesome husband and king to my future queen❤💯 thank you for this.
You got this
Awesome! So proud of you!
The society we live in today is sexualised in a big way, admittedly I must have watched 50 or more videos on dating, day game and getting instant dates by being someone I'm not. I decided to understand Gods will for me and to follow that with the commandments he has set. I fell so much better for being myself. I love my Job currently as I get to change lives by helping the less fortunate. Thank you for the informative video :). God Bless !!
Sex before marriage is a sin. The devil is a liar
Hi Brad!
Vicki Baker indeed it is a sin
You are correct! Finding a good Christian Man is harder to find nowadays but I won't settle. I will just go about my life and enjoy my singleness 😇
Thats the smart thing to do
Right
I did not meet that guy yet, but im praying for him.
The issue is usually the B part, bearing fruits. Some people call themselves Christians, the fruits says a whole lot of different thing.
It is well
Holy Moley... I've found him! Hard working, kind, great listener. I was content being single and God spoke to me one random day and said, "I have someone for you. " He said it over and over again. I wasn't looking for anyone! About a month later, I ran into an acquaintance that I hadn't seen in a couple of years at a funeral of all places. I started chatting him up and he was a little shy toward me. We started talking and we've been together ever since. That was 10 months ago and although we've had ups and downs, I know he's the one God told me about.
I love this story 🥰
So happy for you! Blessings to you both!
My man is a hard working, good listener, and wonderfully kind. Thank you God!
The reason there are less Christian men in the church is because brothers aren’t sharing the gospel with them these days and I say brothers because I’ve shared the gospel with guys and things got misconstrued so I’ve come to find that it’s better for guys to hear from men. And in addition I would add some common sense. I dated the nicest guy who was also very naive that it hurt his business/income twice.
My bf has all of these qualities! I feel so blessed. Thank you for this message Mark! 💜
You are awesome! Amen, no one is talking about this your videos are done humbly and with good taste! God bless you and your family Mark!🌺Have a blessed day.🙂
Thanks Eva Kelley, may God bless you too :)
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger You are welcome thanks Mark.🌺
I've been single for awhile I am in no rush because I want to find that person with Christian good moral values , easy to get along with , seeks goodness in life every day , plain and simple.......
Did you find that person yet?
I met many men with these characters in my early and late 20's but I was such an avoidant woman and overlooked these characters from a man. I asked God to renew my mind and give me wisdom. And now am 31, I have met a man who has the exact qualities you've mentioned. We're already establishing genuine friendship, but he really wants to pursue me to marriage. However, I still have to guard my heart and tell God about him. Am waiting on the LORD. Thank you so much, Mark for this video. Somehow, I am enlightened! May our good God bless you more! Jen from Manila, Philippines.
Witchcraft is against God. Please stop watching Harry Potter it’s got spells you don’t know what these actually means it could be summoning demons! God said sorcerers will go hell. Please stop
Thank you for this. Grew up without a dad and my mom and I never talked about relationships. I am not necessarily a young woman and I'm learning a lot here, thank you🙏🏽💜
I'm so glad this content has been helpful to you! God has a plan!
I am waiting for a good woman but I am perfectly content being single. Yes I would like a partner/ helper. But we are not from this worldly place. If you could not be blessed with a loving partner here, I'm sure the Lord will bless us when we get there!!!
Where are they at? I'm pretty sure I'm one of them. Problem is, I find women don't notice us as much as they should. My own pastor told me I have very good traits to be a husband, have saved myself for marriage to this day(I'm 25 now), never broke a girls heart etc. The three qualities you described in this video describe me perfectly. But he said to me that sometimes women just don't "see" you sometimes. He gave me a story about a guy who needed to sharpen his "outward" appearance a little bit before he met the woman he married. He said that's not the case with me but that he isn't quite sure yet what kind of sharpening I need to do to be noticed more. He alluded to the possibility of shyness. I do have a habit of running away from a girl if I start to have feelings for her due to being afraid of getting hurt. I wonder if that may be my problem. I've had lots of older women tell me that they cannot understand why or how a guy like me could still be single.
The right one will surely notice you
Thank you for the good advice. I am chatty and extroverted. I would worry if I met a quiet guy that I would have most conversation doing 90% of the communicating. I would worry that my passionate extroverted nature would over shadow him. I 100% agree that hard working and kind are very wonderful things in a man. Those things are sadly under rated. Charm, wealth, and good looks only go so far and just are not enough to make a happy life together. You will be miserable with just those to hold love together.
Amen Valerie Hodson, I like this perspective you shared.
Gibbon I have never met a introvert thats chatty. Are you chatty with everyone or just people you are close to. If you are chatty with everyone, maybe you are not a introvert.
@Gibbon
"I mean you shouldn't be judging a person by personality."
Are you kidding me?
"I'm brutally violent, stingy and unkind. Don't judge me...just sup up my personality and marry me!"
Sure thing.
@Gibbon I'm not hating on anyone, I was implying that the comment was bizarre as we all judge. We need to judge to help us make the best possible decisions when it comes to forming relationships.
@Gibbon Hey, no problem and no offence meant or taken!
I'm sorry that you are experiencing a season of loneliness and I hope that it will not last much longer.
Some people say that these seasons of loneliness (despite the horrid and vacuous feelings that come from it) may prove to be a blessing depending on how you spend the time. Some people may suggest to use this time to form a closer relationship with God.
However, I'm aware that there are different reasons leading to loneliness. It could be down to personality type (such as crippling shyness), geographical location, medical condition - just to suggest a few possible causes. Some of these causes are difficult to navigate and overcome.
There is definitely a need for human companionship. Even if we feel that we do not want to get married, even if we feel that God has given us the gift of singleness, God created us to be sociable beings and thus we have a longing to form deep, trustworthy and fulfilling relationships. Unfortunately we are living in a time when relationships are fraught with negativity. Evidence of this can be found every time we are informed of current affairs, be they on a local or global level. It's designed to make people to feel psychologically polarised which in turn isolates us from each other. Once confusion sets in, depression may shortly follow and that's why it is so important to always keep close to God.
I hope he blesses you soon.
Thank you for another very useful topic! I wish I had someone like you to listen to when I was younger. Your relationship series are tremendous.
Thanks Love Beyond The Sea, so glad to hear this channel is helpful :)
Great video. As a man, it helps me to zone in on what I need to sharpen. God bless.
So glad it was useful!
Another thing that I heard over the years as a Christian. If you could find one quality in a person of course after being in a relationship with Christ is that he is able to confess his issues and work on them.
That is certainly important as well
Three cheers for the nice guys... 😆
Cheers, Cheers, Cheers! My granddaddy was the quiet type. He went to work everyday even when he was sick. My brothers too! There is nothing wrong with a guy being shy! Smart, shy, nice, quiet, gentleman... those are good qualities to have outside of Spiritual aspect.
I don't like the over the top, flashy type, stay in the mirror longer than I would, flamboyant type. That's too much! My granddaddy wasn't loud. My brothers aren't loud. My uncles are not loud either.
This may sound calloused, but...
Where are all the potential Christian husbands? In the friend zone where you ladies left us.
I agree with you, Mark, about the work ethic. It's super important to me. I always believed in working HARD no matter what, even if it wasn't my forever job...especially during a recession when I had to take part-time retail work. God sees us putting in the hard work!
I'm one of those odd ball women that are more attracted to the introverted, silent type. My current crush has or exhibits all three of these qualities.
One the second point; always ask "Do you want advice, for me to fix it, or for me to just listen?", at least in a sly way.
Trust me. It'll save a lot of trouble in the long run.
Kindness, work ethic and being slow to voice an opinion are definitely dependable qualities I will be looking for. I myself aim for kindness rather than niceness because they're not the same thing. Being "nice" is often weak and spineless, and it also tends to be about your own comfort rather than doing the right thing. Kindness can be confrontational without being mean.
Great video.
Thank you Mark. As a mom with young adults, this is very useful information. God bless you!
My pleasure! I'm so glad it was helpful to you!
true. ....... i hate working in general 😂😂😂😁😁 but I hate being broke so much more.
Being broke is not fun :)
I met a good Christian guy going out to meet with a group of friends one night outside a bar I told God if that's the guy make it clear to me after I had a really good conversation with this dude who doesn't drink and listened to me talk about my issues for 40 minutes. Last time I saw him he smiled I waved and didn't talk to him because I didn't want to come off as chasing him. I'll maybe see him again.
For some reason in our day and age, people are somewhat suspicious of people are genuinely 'nice' at times. I strongly encourage you to 'Ruth' that up, he made another video about Christian sisters pursuing men, I strongly recommend you check that one out ;) ua-cam.com/video/ZO78FfA6LKY/v-deo.html
Can't hurt to look into this more :)
Ya both involved in an interesting conversation both good listeners this is how to having a meaningful conversation. I'm surprised by how many people find a hard time just being open and willing to talk about life.
This is really awesome and helpful!!! I’m really praying about my season with my boyfriend, he has all of these qualities and he is a wonderful christian man! I’m just praying for guidance and for God to give me clarity about the future! although sometimes i’m not sure what to think because i’m not sure how to tell if God is 100% speaking to me, but i’m still incredibly happy with my relationship :))
-strong work ethic (goes to work everyday!) not lazy!!
-a good listener (not necessarily gonna be a huge talker)
-kindness
wheeew Lord! Thank you for this is confirmation of what I measured in a guy in the past. lol.
I truly love ❤️ these traits within a Christian man. I already know a great guy at my church, lol!!!
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I LOVE #kindness and I am #KIND!!!! I want #someone like that! I want someone to love and who loves me and protects me!!! 😁💗💗💗
I love this channel😍so helpful, although I was a christian I didn't know how to cope with so many situations, especially in dating, thank you so much, Mark, you're doing an amazing job on UA-cam👏🏼👏🏼😻
Thanks Vegan With Love! I appreciate the encouragement and I'm so glad to hear this channel is helpful :)
These are the 3 qualities i am looking and praying for. Amen!
Amen Ruth!
I've found all 3 in a guy, but unfortunately he didn't want what I wanted which was a relationship...😞
Oh well...God will bless me anyway.
Amen! Where are these men??? Lol 😂
Doris Lim If you find out, please let me know!!
Renee Fries Hahaha.....please let me know too!
lol funny, cause I do have a guy in the friend zone but we both treat each other like siblings, it feels weird...it's like we both would make a great couple but we both just don't have the attraction, it's like if I were to kiss him I would puke hahaah, same thing he says to me 😂, there's just nada feelings of love 😂
RiYiN Lol...all accessed and no guys even in the friend zone...I am the one that is usually friend zoned by guys. Sad but true!
RiYiN I'm currently going through a situation with a guy and I don't know what to do about it. I don't know if we're just meant to be friends, something more, or nothing at all!
Honestly, I’m super introverted and WISHED I was more talkative but that’s just not me. Lots of women pass me by without considering getting to know me. It’s very frustrating but when someone told me that every person needs a personality like mine. It made me feel good but for real ladies… This is good.
How old are you?
Welp... 3 for 3, haha. Awesome video yet again! It's interesting you say there's more Christian woman out there, than there are men. I feel like I'm having a hard, hard time finding them it seems.
Justin Morgan
Man i feel you
Iam in the same boat
Did you guys approach any single lady in your church to ask them for a coffee in a friendly way? I mean it is happening a lot even in my church more single women than men and the women are usually saying that they are never approached by anyone and felt unlikable. So maybe because someone isn't fixing themselves they are made out to sound unlikable? Difficult to deal with? If you became a friend at first then things might go from there? In my opinion we cannot be flirting like the world do in a sexual way.
TheComing IsSoon Haha! Funny you should ask... I've been fancying this new woman who I suddenly started noticing at my family church. I believe she's a new member. She's quiet, sits, and keeps to herself. Maybe I'll have to try that someday. And I absolutely agree with you about not flirting like the rest of the world does these days, I've never been that way anyways, it's just not me.
Justin Morgan you go bro. I will pray for you. A woman of God gives man good balance.
TheComing IsSoon Thanks man, keep up the good content! You've helped me out quite a bit since you've started your channel.
Love the quiet guys, never liked talkative guys. Who likes that? Kindness is always very attractive in all people, friends or potential husband alike.
All three are definitely in my top 5. This is a great video. Love the content. TFS
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can you share about the other two traits in your top 5?
(Christian that's producing fruit, Kindhearted, Patient, Great work ethic and great listener. )
Thank you for this Mark. I'm glad you pointed these traits out. I love watching all of your videos. They are so helpful. I'm praying for my future husband whoever he is.
So true. I looked at the talketive guy. But I would definitely look more, for nice, good listener, great work ethic. I will give him a chance!! Best video ever!! Thanks!!
I love working how can you not? You get a sense of purpose some type of goal to work towards (if you work in projects), it keeps you busy and gives you great confidence when you do well and you get paid on top of that! How can you not like that ? Unless of course you work in a toxic environment.
Actually, at work I am surrounded by such kind of men, they are all married and I do not have a problem with that at all. Just appreciating the fact that those kind of people are just a blessing to be around. As a woman, I am watching and learning.
Not to sound boastful but I posess all three of these qualities. I go to work, am never late and do the best job i can possibly do even though i cant stand my job and am currently looking for a new one. I have been told numerous times that I am a good listener. Theres almost nothing i enjoy more than a good deep conversation. I am that guy in the room thats being quite and generally just minding his own business. I am kind. I will never be just blatantly unkind to someone. Im a firm believer in the golden rule and i give everyone a chance. Just dont try to tale advantage of me or betray my trust. I am also the guy that has been single his entire life. I have been looking for my intended for over two decades. I just pray that I find her soon because honestly, im tired. Im tired of the hurt and the loneliness. And im tired of the search and nothing but rejections. While I agree these are three great qualities for anyone to have they havent helped me find my bride or love.
That moment when the guy you like at church does all these things 😁👏
Any decent man can be all these things and still not be the one. The highest standard is that he has a personal relationship with God and lives for him first. Shame there are more Christian women than Christian men though. I will probably never get married just because there isn't anyone available! I'm not going to say that I'm not upset at this prospect, but I commit it to God and ask Him to fill my heart. I'd love to be married but I'm content being single if that is God's will.
Thanks bro, all your videos are very helpful for us believers , my fiancé has those qualities and at first it scared me. 😂
I would agree. It is very hard to find a man these days that have a strong work ethic, a man that is a good listener, and a man that is kind and gentle. I know there are that have these qualities but its really rare to find.
It's true that they are hard to find but as you said, they are out there
True... I value all the 3 traits you mentioned in this video
Excellent advise Mark, on all 3 point! The first one, on work ethic, is very true...it's not in style as it should be, I'm afraid. However, I have found both extremes-the individual that doesn't want to work and the individual that all that matters to him is work, and ends up neglecting the relationship. I guess both are bad. But your advise is head on. Now all we have to do is put it to practice. The question would be, where are they? LOL!? 🤔🤔🤔🤓😊 With that said Mark, let me ask you a question, if I may. A friend of mine made a comment once that made me wonder if true. She said that Christian men are hard to find because they are sooo scared of falling into sexual temptation that they go and stay away from dating altogether. Basically, they hide. Since you are a counselor and I'm sure there are many personal stories you have heard, do you think there may be truth to this?
I think that's true sometimes but I probably wouldn't say it's the main reason there are less Christian guys. I think a lot of Christian guys are scared of women bc they don't want to fail at "winning" her and they don't want to be rejected. I also think there are genuinely more Christian women in America. There are many reasons for this, but my guess is bc the church has lost the meaning of true masculinity many times and doesn't know how to speak to an man's heart and true desires.
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger Makes sense. I hope this changes for the better. Thank you Mark and God bless!
Nice is what anyone can be for show. Kind comes from a person’s character. Prefer kind over nice.
Ephesians 5 man and his Proverbs 31 woman. I didn't have good male role models, maternally but my daddy and his brothers were that, and that's what I lean on.
Thank you this actually helped alot and open my eyes thanks and God bless ur marriage bro 😊
Mark, i hv been praying for a Godly man . Pliz help me in yr prayer too
I just prayed for you Chongpy Misao :)
Thank q very much Mark , can i hv yr email add if thats ok with you?..fr india
Chongpy Misao Same sis
marry a russian man
Hi Mark! This is one of my favorite videos on your channel that I've watched so far! The guy I like is 15, so he doesn't have a job yet, *but* he works out and pushes himself hard. He is probably a great listener too! He doesn't talk a whole lot and I'm still getting to know him, but if God wanted us together in the future, he seems like that kind of person. The guy I like is also very kind and honorable towards others! He held the door open for me when I left church on Tuesday, and is just nice in general and smiles whenever he sees me. If only now God will answer my prayers that he is the one for me! 🙏
If he doesn't have a job maybe get to know what he is like academically because the academic life precedes work life. Does he perform without complaining? Does he work to maintain good grades or better his grades? etc. He sounds like a great guy.
@@ayabongazungu4041 He has been offered several jobs now that he is 16. I don't go to school with him so I don't know, but I bet he has great grades! And yes, he is a blessing from God.
For a balanced picture of someone it’s important to consider the good and not so good sides and evaluate the characteristics as a whole like how bad is the bad and how great is the good stuff!
You are so wise. Great video
So glad this was helpful to you Alice :)
Yes it is very important to be a good listener. When you listen well. You learn a lot.
There are Definitely more Christain women then men out there !! Lol , Glad you noticed that !
😂sad but true
Lauraç Baier maybe, but very few good ones.
FenderSchonJPX I'm sure your right !! God Bless !
I mean, now it's sadly gotten to the point that it's obvious of the shortage of men...but God will provide.
There are more women in general. I do agree there is an aversion to the “nice guy” or “forgiving.” I think the need for instant gratification doesn’t allow for important elements such as trust to be established. Also some of the events in main stream media and family courts has caused discouragement. I believe many need to be reminded that God also brings healing from very deep wounds, forgiveness of sins, and rest for the heavily laden.
I couldn’t agree with these 3 more. Remember ladies, kindness is not weakness. Kindness is as strong as death.
Lol. "Trade a few points on the sexy scale"😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
PS---Pastor, the reason SOME PEOPLE (UNGRATEFUL WOMEN) don't value hard-working me, is because THEY DON'T WORK AS HARD! Guess what? THEY'RE NOT GONNA THINK IT'S CUTE WHEN THEY ARE BOTH sleeping outside or being put down because they're applying for food stamps or other government resources! GOD SAYS "IF YOU DO NOT WORK YOU DO NOT EAT" (Acts) Also, "all hard work leads to a profit" (Proverbs)
excellent video Mark... I continue to enjoy being in a season of singleness... have not met a Christ-centred man with these qualities... wish more guys would watch your videos
You are welcome, I'm so glad you are enjoying the content
I agree but from what I seen . I need to chase after what God called me to do. Not trying to look for her. As work - well I had an accident 2 years ago so..... I am on disability & do ok. I take my time now to get better , spend time with God in His presence & practice playing. This time has been a blessing - it's teaching me how to depend on God for everything. It's showing me what is in my heart - pride ( I was taught to take care of myself) . But I have learned over time to really let go. I am being real. Trust me, you don't know what is in your heart until the heat is on. God is faithful to bring me to where He has called me.
As for more Christian women - 🤔 where ? I guess I am in the wrong state. 😂
Which state?
I think the bad rap that nice guys get has to do with the "false nice guys". Such as those who act nice but they put on a front and are not honest and have bad intentions. Unfortunately, when there is a authentic kind man, he can't be trusted because so many fake people also act nice just to you into their trap, such as the stingy man in Proverbs 23
These value help me to decide. thanks Mark
My pleasure eva nancy :)
Pastor Mark-this relates to what you said about not wanting a mean guy giving you a hard time when you come home from work. (abt WOMEN and what MEN want in a WIFE) (JUST ONE of the verses about this) Proverbs 21:9
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Absolutely 💯 % true! Especially #2 nowadays!
My ex bf has great work ethic and is a nice guy but lacked the listening part..I rather have an understanding man who listens..if you bring up an issue and he gets offended rather than trying to understand you then that is sign.
Kindness is sooooo underrated ❤
Even the Proverbs 31 woman has a hustle. So yes, the woman is to bring in financial support as well.
Hey Mark! Good to see your video. I can tell you are finding your "groove" in making these videos! Keep up the good work!
For the first time my man imma have to disagree with the second point because I am an extrovert I talk to many people but I am also a good listener too
No worries, glad we are mostly on the same page usually though :)
I’m reading some of these comments and they are all about what OTHERS are doing. But are u examining yourselves? Are you doing what the Bible tells you to do? Are u walking the way God has called you to walk? Instead of fussing what others are doing or not doing, are focusing on your actions? Instead of looking at others are or aren’t doing, focus on making you a better you and let God focus on the others.
Yes and yes! Instead of looking for the one, become the one. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all else will be added to you.
A comment calling out other comments who are talking about other people . . . wow, now that's heady . . .
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger lol! You bet!
I agree with you and Miss Priss ;) Examining and judging the others its a bad idea and definitely NOT the Christian attitude ! The letter to St. Joseph for future husband is a better one :) :D I do not like classify people to real/not real Christian too(it leads to selfness pride and its seen in the comments here like :' IM super truly Christ centered person and others are not and its better to be single because other people are not enough wise Christ-centered ' - wait what ! :O ). They are people who simply follow the Christ, and who are against Him regardless what they are saying and thinking about themselves( they are false prophets and many will be suprised at the end) . .
I just want to say thanks for all these videos and bless you and your marriage as well as your life. May God bless your marriage so much and all of you reading my post in Jesus' almighty name. Amen.
Lots of love❤
Brother your ministry is sick a blessing to me!
Completely overlooked qualities 🙃
Arturo Mena I always looks for a person with strong ethic before looks lol.
Amen me too
I work very hard every single day at my job knowing I have a very hard time trying a little bit and bringing Jesus into my life that he can help me out when I'm at work and I need to do this more is bringing Jesus into my life I am still working on myself for being a Christian and my papa helps me all the time and gives me stuff that I need to know about being Christian
The one thing I brag about is my work ethic
Thank you, this is really encouraging, thank you Mark, you are very brave.
Thanks Judith, God bless!
I really appreciate your ministry. Although I am in a different season of life, I still listen so I can increase in knowledge and wisdom. I know its truth because its biblically based, but I also have the benefit of looking back because I have lived a lot of it. Thank you for your obedience.
Thank you! Very timely, God bless you!
You are welcome Alicia Kiarie, God bless you too :)
This is great content! Great tips, really appreciate it 👍
Thank you!! Another one on my favourites! I've written down my notes lol
God bless you 🙏🏽
So glad you enjoyed it!
Sorry I just have to point out, that all the women out here just because there’s a lot of us and less Christian men, doesn’t mean that if you have faith it won’t happen because if you have faith in God our Father, he can make massive miracles happen by spirit. All we have to do is build in faith and trust the Lord completely and give our lives to him. Hallelujah Lord in the name of Jesus and by the Holy Spirit. Amen.
About the work ethic, I thought going to work was something "normal" that everybody does. But believe me it surprised me how many young adults nowadays are trying to avoid work.
Do you have a video on the difference between testing godly fruits vs just beginning plain judgmental & having too much of a high unrealistic standard?
Hard-working IS sexy.
They're all were in the friendzone but than they escaped and can't be found now by the ladies. Christian women rejects the men with these 3 qualities.
No. We're looking for them with these qualities among others
This is sooooo essential :) Made me decide who to give chance 😎 thank u Mark!!!
This time is soooo into chasing "highs"...that truly scares me. It encourages people to irresponibility and not to value faithfulness and commitment. Feels like people are encouraged to follow every crazy idea they get as if it automatically was their divine calling. And now they were just asked to take the "leap of faith" to fulfill their dreams...I value men with common sense and a sense of responsibility way more.
Very true. A bit of 2 Tim 4:3 there. "Itching ears"...
Cool video bro
Did you just call us crazy?? lol but yes you’re right about everything!
Me and my highschool friend just talked about this yesterday..
Agree with you sir.