How To Be Socially Attractive AF

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  • @NewHorizonsBeats
    @NewHorizonsBeats 9 місяців тому +85

    I think people are missing the point of this video. Yes, it’s not a good habit to “want everyone to like you.” But that’s not what Kenny is trying to help us do. He’s trying to help us build social skills and habits that will help us make friends and more easily integrate into the social circles we wish to be integrated into.
    Human beings are social creatures and we all have social circles that we are a part of. We should want to do well in these circles so that people see us as worthy of membership in the tribe. If you put out vibes of “well I don’t care about what other people think of me, so I’m just gonna not try improve my social skills and not care if I come across as an asshole” then people are not going to want you in their tribe.
    (I know, because I used to be somebody that thought like this. I basically failed to make any lasting friendships in my high school/hometown because of it and am still feeling the effects of this at 22. Thank God I shaped up just in time for college lmao.)

  • @Berkfulm3D
    @Berkfulm3D 9 місяців тому +72

    3:50 that conversation was… realistic💀 love your videos bro

  • @M11dy
    @M11dy 8 місяців тому +38

    Social tips:
    - Ask ppl question abt their life and their interest, and make them interesting by listening and interacting.
    - Praise and compliment others ( relative to the convo )
    - Find common experiences and interests, go deep in them.
    - Be present ( by meditation )
    - Mirror the other person’s body language ( don’t over do it )
    - Avoid preframing ( don’t have negative facial expressions in socials)

  • @Shadmannnn
    @Shadmannnn 2 місяці тому +8

    1. Make Them Interesting: Focus on the other person’s life as if it’s the most fascinating story, avoiding oversharing about yourself.
    2. Sprinkle Them with Praise: Compliment people genuinely, which will make them subconsciously view you positively.
    3. Find Common Ground: Look for shared experiences or interests to bond over, as this strengthens connections quickly.
    4. Be Present: Cultivate presence in conversations, making the other person feel valued and heard, which helps in building rapport.
    5. Mirror Them: Subtly mimic the other person’s body language to create a subconscious connection, making them feel understood and liked.
    6. Pre-frame: Be aware of your facial expressions and body language before speaking, as people form judgments within seconds.
    7. Express Selective Vulnerability: Share personal experiences or emotions selectively to create a deep emotional bond, which can make others feel closer to you.

  • @michelseifert5712
    @michelseifert5712 9 місяців тому +3

    great video and great examples! Its not just about "i dont need everybody to like me".... but be able to make new friends or become better friend to your current friend by implementing stuff like making them feel interested and be present in conversations. Its easy to say "they should just like me how i am" as an excuse to not try to be a better social interactor if youre not born with talent for it.

  • @Zushikikato1989
    @Zushikikato1989 9 місяців тому +6

    i will never give anyone compliments other then my family members.
    I complimented a girl once and i got laughed at and roasted by her and her friends. After that her friend tried getting me to give her a compliment, but i couldnt give it to her cuz i thought i will get roasted again. And when im minding my own buisness, they (the girl that wanted a compliment and the girl that roasted me for giving a compliment) quietly ask themselves why i dont give compliments and only make fun of others.
    So me personally compliments are unknown.

    • @kenny.bender
      @kenny.bender  9 місяців тому +14

      so you're basing your entire philosophy on one isolated event?

    • @YoCreedgg
      @YoCreedgg 8 місяців тому +1

      @@kenny.bender lmao

    • @matthewheald8964
      @matthewheald8964 23 дні тому

      @@kenny.benderI was just thinking the same thing

  • @anirudhkotnala8a646
    @anirudhkotnala8a646 9 місяців тому +18

    That b**b thing was so relatable😂
    Thats how i become friends to my class boys
    Great vdeo❤

  • @samirastic
    @samirastic 11 днів тому

    You literally hit the point. Literally 7 months ago I haven't subscribed to you when you posted this video. however, I used every single function that you mentioned on this video. I used to prepare for the ielts exam with my groupmates . Every single time my teacher checked on my speech he would praise and confidently tell that i would hit high score in speaking as i used these 7 tips that you shared (even though i didnt watched the video that moment). One day , my mom without telling me registered to a mock exam. I didn't prepared for anything, i just remained the calm confidence . The day of mock exam , i used open body language, positive facial expression, and feeling completely confident while i was talking to the examiner . In the end i got 7.5 out of 9 from speaking . Thank you for your beautiful patientce while reading it. Additionally , im grateful for creating such an effective video .

  • @quixpetric1943
    @quixpetric1943 9 місяців тому +2

    I’ve been struggling with this exact problem recently, so the fact that this video came out when it did is amazing. Thanks again Kenny.

  • @randallchad801
    @randallchad801 9 місяців тому +4

    Thanks for your videos, it makes me feel better ! Just don't stop and keep going bro !

    • @kenny.bender
      @kenny.bender  9 місяців тому +2

      thank you brother, hopefully we can push this channel out of the current "dead" state soon!

    • @randallchad801
      @randallchad801 8 місяців тому +1

      Who cares about number of views, quality is more important 🗿

  • @pooglagoon8163
    @pooglagoon8163 9 місяців тому +3

    Your content is phenomenal, so informative

  • @KevvoLightswift
    @KevvoLightswift 9 місяців тому +2

    Love this, Kenny. Thanks for putting this on your channel. Do you plan to put this in your mental mastery course?

  • @lycarix
    @lycarix 8 місяців тому +1

    it would be nice to have a recap of the things at the end

  • @ZINJUN10
    @ZINJUN10 9 місяців тому +4

    Hey chad, Love ur contents

  • @LiterallyCurzed
    @LiterallyCurzed 9 місяців тому +3

    Love your video's

  • @Danishkhan-io9fv
    @Danishkhan-io9fv 9 місяців тому +4

    Hii , I like how you talk and interact with us. Please teach me how you talk so clearly and you sound perfectly pitched, ( sorry for bad English) .

  • @EricTangy
    @EricTangy 9 місяців тому +2

    Yeah buddy

  • @HopeReviews
    @HopeReviews 7 місяців тому +1

    Spectacular job!

  • @Jattsivia007
    @Jattsivia007 9 місяців тому +2

    Wait i thought bro was single. But congo bro . May we win in life

  • @pvlbiz7694
    @pvlbiz7694 5 місяців тому +2

    Gold

  • @Rationalizer-cp3ml
    @Rationalizer-cp3ml 9 місяців тому +3

    You read deeply the book “The Charisma Myth” didn’t you Kenny? 😁

    • @kenny.bender
      @kenny.bender  9 місяців тому +1

      I honestly haven't heard of that book, is it worth reading?

  • @NuclearGaming27
    @NuclearGaming27 5 місяців тому +1

    Uncle Ben taught us one thing, keep that in mind

  • @samsebastine1295
    @samsebastine1295 9 місяців тому

    Thanks for teaching us sir

  • @RandyCrowder-k4f
    @RandyCrowder-k4f 9 місяців тому +4

    This won't work for me I am nerodivergent I don't know what to do I tried all these things and they do not work with mu autism I am just masking not showing my true self this won't work make a nerodivergent version of this video.

    • @AkinfenwaMode
      @AkinfenwaMode 4 місяці тому +2

      Try focusing on every word that the person you are talking to is saying. Think less about what your doing in the conversation and more about what they are doing/saying. Plus humans tend to know when someone is paying attention or not, so if you are simply paying attention to what they are saying that will make you more likeable.

    • @Shadmannnn
      @Shadmannnn 2 місяці тому

      I can help you

  • @V_ChessGuy
    @V_ChessGuy 8 місяців тому

    Thank you so much for this video. I used to struggle with lots of social anxiety, and I was a very quiet person when I was younger. I'm improving my social skills, but videos like these can really help me get to the normal level of social intelligence. I wish ya the best

  • @Whitedevil_44
    @Whitedevil_44 9 місяців тому +2

    Hiii Man

  • @ecronaclon47
    @ecronaclon47 9 місяців тому +1

    I literally met with someone over coffee over this topic on Thursday. Bro, are you just like, monitoring my life or something? lol

  • @dragoscirlan2307
    @dragoscirlan2307 9 місяців тому +83

    you don't need to make everyone like you

    • @tsivilsඞ
      @tsivilsඞ 9 місяців тому +16

      I agree. I missed out on so many things I've wanted bc I wanted people to like me. I've chased being "good person" for so long.
      But like Armin Arlert says in aot, "good is just what people call someone who is GOOD TO THEM".
      And I've realized that I can never be a good person for everyone. Especially since it means I'll never be good to myself.
      I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that I may have to be the villain in someone's story to truly live a life without regret. I'm done denying myself what I want bc I'm afraid someone will look at me a certain way or that it will put me at odds with another. That said, it is still nice to know how to make people feel good and learn how to be less miserable to be around lol. It's just a balancing act of learning when to throw that aside in pursuit of something more important

    • @graysonburns4500
      @graysonburns4500 9 місяців тому +13

      The point of the video is to be more generally likeable. Not to make EVERYONE like ya

    • @Trash_Bandit-o8k
      @Trash_Bandit-o8k 5 місяців тому

      But I wanna :(

    • @AkinfenwaMode
      @AkinfenwaMode 4 місяці тому

      @@Trash_Bandit-o8k You dont

    • @PrOtaku123
      @PrOtaku123 2 місяці тому

      Truth is you don't need everyone to like you, make people like themselves when you are around

  • @barracudaboi790
    @barracudaboi790 8 місяців тому +10

    Why do you have a skeleton in the background?

    • @Platofish
      @Platofish 8 місяців тому +2

      Because he’s super handsome

    • @Trash_Bandit-o8k
      @Trash_Bandit-o8k 5 місяців тому +2

      Why not? Skellies are cool :)

    • @barracudaboi790
      @barracudaboi790 5 місяців тому +4

      Thank you, you two. You fellows have given me the answer I needed.

    • @saltycupkakes2799
      @saltycupkakes2799 2 місяці тому

      Sister everyone has skeletons in the closet, I mean background

    • @barracudaboi790
      @barracudaboi790 2 місяці тому +1

      @@saltycupkakes2799 If this was a reply to me only and not the other repliers, I get your point, bud. But only one thing, I am a brother, not a sister, thanks.

  • @imacomputer1234
    @imacomputer1234 9 місяців тому

    Or just be a nice person. Then the only people who won't like you aren't worth having in your life anyways.

  • @Mfycnt
    @Mfycnt 9 місяців тому

    Hiiii Kennyyy

  • @jeremiahtrumanmusik6186
    @jeremiahtrumanmusik6186 8 місяців тому

    I liked you better in the second clip lol

  • @alexlorente3185
    @alexlorente3185 9 місяців тому

    Convershation

  • @DaHeazPlays
    @DaHeazPlays 9 місяців тому

    9:55 Blud forgot his left and right 💀💀💀

    • @kenny.bender
      @kenny.bender  9 місяців тому +3

      haha yeah technically I forgot the viewer's left and right

  • @YoureNotReet
    @YoureNotReet 2 місяці тому

    You look like a Degrassi character

  • @ShyamkrishnanNair
    @ShyamkrishnanNair 28 днів тому

    Absolutely, I relate to this! In school, I often felt like I was on the outside looking in, wishing for deeper connections but feeling stuck behind invisible walls. It’s tough when humor feels like a double-edged sword-sometimes it breaks the ice, and other times it leaves you feeling cringy.
    I found that humor can be a bridge, not just a joke, especially after joining the Sense of Humor Improvement Program by Habit10x. Embracing humor helps in connecting with others and easing those social barriers. Keep pushing through; your vibe will attract the right tribe!