People confuse preference with sexuality. Being attracted to intellegent people is NOT a sexuality, it is a preference. Someone likes red heads (he-he), someone likes tall people, rough people, gentle people, some men like curvy women, some like slim ones, etc etc etc. We all have a preference, it's not that complicated.
@TadanoCandy so true. For the brits, do yous remember page 3 of the Sun...I remember my mum ripping out that page when I was a child before I could see the newspaper.
I grew up during the Tumblr days and eating disorders & self harm were the trend with young girls. Now with Tiktok it seems to be gender identity and sexualities. I wonder what makes us more prone to this stuff?
Asexuality is not human behavior. Asexuals how are sexually attracted to anyone but still want to have sex. Because you don't have to be attracted to someone he wants to feel the feel-good feelings at sex brings people. Asexual doesn't have to just not have a libido. I suggest ask you asking that the definition of asexal.
As a straight woman, I find a lot of people of either sex very attractive. Doesn't mean I want a sexual relationship with them. More often than not, I just want to paint them. I'm an artistsexual or something like that. LOL. Haven't decided if I want to paint you yet or not. Decisions, decisions.
i think people forget that you don't have to be special. not everything needs a label , you're allowed to just exist. really interesting points as usual, thank you patience.
I think kids being raised on the internet these days has clued them in on how big the world is and how no one really is “special.” It feels like now how special you are is determined by how many minority groups you’re a part of, which is why everyone is adopting microlabels and why everyone puts their sexuality and mental illnesses in their social media bios (that part confuses me, I’m bisexual but I don’t want it to be the first thing people know about me when they see my social media)
I am currently 16 and during the pandemic, when I was 14, I began to truly believe I was straight demisexual. I was even planning on “coming out”. Then my mind got back to Earth.
That’s called maturing, you have a healthy brain. My not so very proud of story: When I was 12 in the 2000s the trend was emo ana/mia (anorexia) on fotolog and myspace and I was influenced by that so much that I also thought I had anorexia and had to lower my weight to illogical weights, not because I had anorexia but simply because that was the trend back then, I didn’t have the dismorphia… I wanted the dismorphia. Good thing that didn’t last me long, because we moved with my grandmother and is impossible to diet with her. The lgtb+++++ thing is totally a trend now days, but is scary how many kids are now more influenced by this, to even get surgeries… i had access to internet yes, but back then we shared one computer in the house for … 8 people. Now teens have this tiny computer in their room and this influences them even more. Now as an adult I realize how influenciable trends are scary.
lmao i used to think i was gay cyz the dudes around me were immature and i wasnt attracted to them, couldnt relate to them and i had a gf, then at 15 till now i met my bf, im definitely still bisexual since i still find women attractive but im def not gay lmao.
I am black and bi but I always knew that I was bi. I had a huge crush on a girl in 5th grade and just accepted reality. Although I am bi, I do not identify as LGBT. I feel like what I see from the LGBT community does not represent me or reflect any of my beliefs. Also your sexuality should never be your personality. I even had people asking me if I was asexual because I never voiced my sexuality or liking for any other person (Johnny Depp is the only expection). I also have an African background so I always knew to keep quiet about my sexuality. I feel like being lgbt is the new trend and people want to be special
I agree with this and the more I look at the messages and narratives that are being pushed I just think “we live in a very unhealthy society” I mean imagine basing your ENTIRE existence over who you are sexually attracted to
I’m black and bi and feel the exact same way. The LGBT Community of today is not something want to be associated with. I really hope TikTok do get band, hopefully then some of the trendiness goes away.
I'm bi. I do not identify as LGBT because I'm not gay, not lesbian and not trans. And I do not see myself as part of the "community" for the same reason as you. Also LGBT, particularly the T nowadays, is absolutely a trend. I remember back when I went to school, every girl was bisexual, even if they only hooked up with guys, because it was the cool thing to be. But back then it was straight bi or gay, not 72 different ones
They're dumb, that's what is wrong with them. You keep being gay, I'll keep being Straight and neither of us will ever be Bi no matter what those weirdos say.
yeah, for some reason, bisexuals have a tendency to project their own experiences onto others... i used to think everyone was secretly bi, but in my defense, i was 14 at the time lol can't imagine still thinking that way as an adult.
@@hette457 so basically the new generation are so talentless that they have to be special by feeling special with labels since they can’t really do anything in life? 😂 I think we gonna extinct ourselves and global warming can move to another planet cuz we are done. 😆
@@hette457 Not really, it just specifies what people are making it easier to socialise with people more effectively. It's only narcissists and egoists who make it solipsistic.
@@hette457 I can't speak for everyone, but when you have never met another person with your sexuality, you think of yourself as broken and undeserving of love. It's thanks to finding a label and people who also relate to that label online that I found out I was normal and just had to be more careful when choosing who to date.
Saying "I'm a ..." makes people feel like they're part of a cool niche group, whereas saying "I'm attracted to intelligence" doesn't make you particularly unique or give you a subgroup with which to belong. It's like the excitement people get from taking a Hogwarts sorting hat quiz, except we've added a couple thousand more houses. It's the paradoxical desire to feel special while also wanting to fit in, this approach satisfies both desires for some people.
I'm reminded of that time Daniel Radcliffe was asked by a comedian (in exchange for about AUD$20) "Who would you turn gay for?", and he replied "Albert Einstein, because I think intelligence is sexy.", and it's as if someone took that response entirely seriously.
I think the three sexualities idea is mostly correct, but asexual should probably be added as a fourth one because there are people who are never sexually attracted to anyone no matter what. Everything described in this video would fall into one of those four categories, and they are not sexualities on their own, just a preference within an already existing sexuality.
@@Cora-wh1rr I would counter that it’s functionally the same even if there is a supposed technical difference it falls into the bisexual category, bisexuality being broadly defined not ultra specifically
@@Cora-wh1rrYou always are either male or female, no matter if you are trans or intersex. Whether you want to date trans/intersex people as a bi person, is a preference.
@Carolin Purayidom Aromantic isn't a sexuality. It just means someone doesn't feel romantic feelings, which are different from sexual attraction and someone of any sexuality can be aromantic
As an asexual who has been identifying this way before tiktok trends, I find it fascinating how an orientation became a trend. Not being sexually attracted to anyone is one thing, but understanding subtexts and social cues is an entirely different kettle of fish. I sometimes wonder whether the new sexualities will not make it harder for the "real" queer folks who just want to live a normal life and not be treated as some token online.
I’ve noticed that a lot of young people who are now identifying as asexual are neurodivergent: autism spectrum, ADD/ADHD, OCD, sensory disorders, etc. If someone gets easily overwhelmed w/ sensory overload, then it kinda makes sense why they might not be interested in sex - or sex with other people anyway.
@@pureperfection9522 This doesn't add anything meaningful to what the original comment said. Of course it's not every single person; no one's saying it is. But if studies show that a much higher percentage of people who claim to be asexual (or have all these made-up genders and sexualities) are also neurodivergent when compared to the general public, that means something. It either means the same thing that causes neurodivergence is linked to the cause of these identities (less likely in my opinion - though the first comment may have a point with asexuality specifically) or it means something with regards to the validity or lack thereof of the supposed identities in at least some cases (more likely imo).
When I was 15 I had a sexual crisis because Tumblr fed me all these labels and made me unsure if I was actually heterosexual (newsflash: I am). Paired with the fact that I had a different taste in men than most of my peers I felt like I just HAD to be wrong- and so I first thought I might be bi: Turns out I confused aesthetic attraction to sexual attraction and found out I was actually repulsed by the thought of kissing a woman or anything further. Then I thought I was ace, then demisexual- turns out, that just like you, that was just my personality. I don’t exactly have to have a super close bond, but I have to have talked to that man or have heard him talk, act etc- know vaguely what he’s like. I identified as a demisexual Heteroromantic woman for a while till I found faults with these labels and also just noticed how much confusion and headache it created in my life that was just completely unnecessary. Ever since I shed the need to chase these labels and also turning away from the leftist side in general, I’ve been a much happier person honestly. So yeah you’re right: It DOES just create confusion and is extremely damaging and counterproductive
See, I'm asexual (specifically sex-repulsed), and I said this in another comment but I feel the need to elaborate: Asexuality, in my case, is quite literally the lack of sexuality ("a" meaning "not" for people who don't understand prefixes). I quite literally have NO sexuality. So it's more like a label, but due to the obsession with labels nowadays, I just see it as a character trait instead of something that comes out of a label maker. It's just part of me, but it doesn't define me. Labels attempt to give some sort of definition (or classification), considering everyone who makes their labels their ENTIRE personality. There's more to me than one of my character traits.
Asexual cannot be a sexuality as how can you have a sexuality but not have a sexual attraction? Its illogical. To me if you're repulsed by anything sexual even if its mild you have something wrong with you mentally since that's objectively not normal. I dont mean that in a demeaning way I'm just being realistic.
@@Badookum the person literally said ”I quite literally have NO sexuality” and then said it’s more like a label. So I think you’re on the same page here. To me, it makes sense that there’s a word to describe people who do not feel any ounce of sexual feelings towards anyone ever, and don’t want to have sex. Even if they’re in the minority.
When you were saying that you consider yourself very regular and that there are lots of people just like you, part of this whole discussion just clicked. The advent of the internet and global community really taking place has really taught people how big the world is and how special they are not. Some people take this as great to know that they are not alone in anything they think or feel. But I think some people (especially young people who tend to be particularly effected by the concerns of individuality) have become desperate to have a way to be different and special again.
I agree, demisexual is just a label, not a sexuality. I'm demisexual and only attracted to women. I use the label, but I agree it is definitely not a sexuality. I don't have the hots for "feelings" so it's just a label, and I enjoy it. Having said that, asexual has a lot more in common with what makes a sexuality in the case of fully asexual people.
I'm asexual (specifically sex-repulsed) and I interpret it as quite literally the lack of sexuality ("a" meaning "not" for people who don't know how prefixes work). So it's more like a label for lack of sexuality, if that makes sense. But I don't think of it as a label because with the obsession with labels nowadays I'm so sick of them. It's just a part of me.
As a bi person who is wildly aware of the LGBT discourse online, trust me when I say that that this fight over labels is SO MUCH WORSE on the inside of the community. People fight over the pansexual, bisexual, omnisexual, polysexual labels all the time and I had a very hard time choosing a label for myself when I was discovering my attraction. They are literally all the same thing: the attraction to both females and males (despite of gender identity, I’m talking purely about like sex cause its like… sexuality). But this fight over labels is exhausting. I much prefer to just call myself queer because I am so so tired of this. (Just making sure to say tho, that asexuality is zero attraction to other people, despite of sexual characteristics, so I would consider that more of a sexuality than a label, unlike Demisexual)
Now there is even abrosexual which I have a huge problem with. To me these people are bisexuals who want a new label or attention. But the annoying thing is, they say your sexual orientation can change (which gay people have been fighting against for decades). Even by a few hours. Imagine waking up as an asexual only to be a lesbian a few hours later. How does that work on a date? If you go out with a man and then realize you are a lesbian, what happens then? 🤣
I'm bisexual but the community has caused me more self hatred and pain than actual homophobes, it's depressing when I can see myself becoming best friends with a homophobe but not someone who's supposedly my own kind
Thank you. I'm asexual and I was confused for a long time because of the difference between aesthetic attraction and regular attraction. I'm not a woman who prefers to be in a relationship to have sex...I just don't get feelings of sexual arousal when looking at anybody
@@deathstar602 people aren't generally attracted to everyone, but they have felt sexual attraction to some people, right? Full asexual peeps don't know what that feels like or how it differs from other attractions like romantic or aesthetic
Asexuality is a tricky one because it involves people trying to describe a feeling ('sexual attraction') which doesn't seem to have a useful definition and can mean different things to different people. Even I'm not sure exactly what is meant by that term separately from just thinking someone's 'attractive' generally. (And like, what the hell is 'romantic attraction'?!) I think some people (like women, generally) just have low libidos, can't relate when people with high libidos are talking, and confuse that with thinking there's something different about them or that they're completely asexual when they're... not.
"no, that's just my personality" sums it up 100%🤣 as a gay man, I also thought that I was demisexual (only towards men) but I was like 20 or something and still a post-adolescent. As my mom says: teenage is an illness healed in time (direct translation from Spanish, I hope it makes sense, though!)
Legit. People forget that bisexuals are not just attracted to men or women, it means they’re attracted to 2+ genders. Some bisexuals have preferences, some do not. Omni, pan, poly all essentially are different words for the same thing
Me and my girlfriend just talked about this. This new stream of various sexualities has basically been straight white women finding a way to force themselves into the LGBT community without actually being LGBT. A lot of white people have started to feel that being straight and white is bad or boring so to spice it up instead of just lying and saying you're bisexual like some women used to you don't even have to pretend to be attracted to women you can just say you like smart guys (sapiosexual) now you're LGBT and not just white.
You took the words right out of my mouth! That’s what I’ve been thinking, when I go in TikTok and social media it’s mostly white people who put these label on themselves. Please stop with the self hatred and white guilt
I’ve seen various levels of ridiculousness from all genders and races, straight white women are not the only ones - if anything, from what I have experienced they are way less about inventing labels to be part of groups. If we just look at the pride flag variations, there’s no straight white woman version of any flag but theres bipoc version, trans version, bipoc trans version, the list goes on on these variations. Everyone wants a niche and their own thing andcreating a new flag or acronym to represent their slice of the rainbow. So your opinion is incorrect based on what actual content is being created and pushed
Yup, it’s the crowd that will do anything to rebel against the traditional. It’s a phase for the majority of them, but when LGBT umbrella essentially is open to anything and everyone it was bound to happen. These girls get a lot of social clout as well being something “other” than straight. These new labels are essentially the emo kids of a generation ago
That’s a problem when we denigrate “white cishet” people. If it was accepted to not be a BIPOC queergender sapiosexual, they wouldn’t be trying to be something they’re not.
Tbh, I had to accept myself that Im straight. I find some girls hot but I dont want to be together with them, I want to be them. Idk why but probably social media and friends made me fee weird for not being Lgbtq.... Like its wrong to be straight? It went as far as me trying to desperately find something lgbtq to identfy as, in order to fit in. I was in denial of being normal and basic. Now I love it, I hate how tik tok says being normal is boring, its not. Its not as extravagant but its comfortable and simple. There are beauty in little things and you feel less stressed about everything. Its so easy to be happy and not jealous at all because some flowers and good book can fulfil me so much.
I thought I was "Demi-Sexual" until I listened to Bill Burrs podcast, he was like "Demi-sexuals are *mumble reads definition*...oh so you're just well adjusted?" changed my perspective instantly. I then started going to the gym.
Todays society is also extremely hyper focused and obsessed w sexual identity and labels to a point where they let it define them entirely and w some it becomes their personality. it’s sad like hey there’s more to u and u don’t have to justify/obsess over that single aspect of yourself constantly :/
Well ofc, that is what society has taught us since day one. If you're a straight man, you're like this. If you're a gay man, you're like that. We need to acknowledge that there's an entire industry built around "straight macho man" and "straight feminine woman", and that it perpetuates the notion that you are your sexuality, instead of it just being a small part of who you are (which how I personally think we should perceive it).
Man I'm only 26 and I had a hard time coming out when I was in high school. Back in the late 2000s and early 2010s it was definitely becoming more known and talked about but it wasn't like it is today with every other teenager being trans and lgbt. It's so crazy to see being gay becoming a trend and so many kids identifying as "queer" which was used as a slur towards me and other gay men at the time. Seeing cis girls who identify as "queer" using words like the F slur on tiktok and thinking its okay just bc they're queer is so offensive. In the 2000s the trend was to be emo/scene, now it's definitely trendy to be lgbt. We gotta stop letting this shit fly.
True but I think it has something to do with the fact that society is more tolerant now therfore more people will identify as queer than before. I finally came out as bi to my close circle a couple years ago because I was raised in a not so tolerant country. I know the trend is annoying but at least we aren't hated if that makes sense.
@@nomi5466 Yeah, queer was used as a derogatory slur mostly towards gay men. I got called that slur a LOT in high school. For some reason in recent years Gen Z decided to use queer as an umbrella term, and I don't know how to feel about it.
I’m a young person myself and I remember a few years in school literally 75+% of the girls identified as bi one after the other. The social contagion phenomenon you mentioned 100% on point. In reality, I think that this whole LGBTQAI++++++ thing is really just a trend that people jump on, and because the requirements of entry are so vague, many people fit in to whichever sexual dichotomy they choose. People just need to figure themselves out and this is how they do it nowadays. The only problem I have with this is when it supersedes things like TikTok and excludes people who don’t fit into these new categories from opportunities. I’m a straight white guy in my last year of highschool. I tried applying for scholarships but many of them were for LGBTQ people only. Out of a dozen scholarships I think I qualified for one or two because of my skin tone and sexual flavour.
Ok, I'm someone that has no interest in dating, marriage or intercourse. But I don't claim to be aromatic or asexual (especially when I find a lot of people attractive). I don't label my orientation. I think it's easier to say "I don't care about romance" rather than saying "I'm aromatic". A lot of people probably won't understand or they'll just roll their eyes out of pure annoyance.
Exactly the asexual thing doesn't make sense and for the longest time asexual meant animals that can reproduce without a sexual partner so I was confused when ppl started using it like what???
Hey Patience, would love to see your view on the video reacted to by many 'what are we doing to white people' and some of Charlie's videos including antiasianess and antiblackness between both and how the media do not speak about it as often, would love to get the word out and get some insight from your respectable opinion, if not i understand, thanks for reading anyway and love your channel so much its very relaxing
Hi patience, I am a 13year old girl and thank you so much for this video, I have been struggling a lot at school due to this and its hard, your totally right kids in my class are exactly like this (mostly girls) everyone thinks they are from some type of sexality group and it seems to be the new trend, at first I didn't care much because it wasn't something I would be into but girls started asking what my sexuality is !! I personally just Identify as straight so I told them straight and they said that I wouldn't stay straight in this class and that I was boring. There was also a girl in my class who I could tell had a crush on me and kept asking me what my sexuality is and I told her straight and one day I was a bit creeped out because I just wanted to be friends so then she sent her friend to go beat me up🥺😞 luckily the teacher stopped it but I have also been bullied for not wanting a sexual relationship yet, and they are giving me all of these labels but your video have me some confidence that there are some people out there who think the same as me so thank you 💖 Also I would like you to make a video explaining your opinion on toddlers watching LGBTQ + shows
We have finally reached the point where those who would’ve been bullied are now the bullies Hang in there and don’t let anyone force you to be anything you’re not
Live your truth! ...I know woke types use that phrase all the time, but you can use it too! As a non-straight that refuses to be part of the LGBT "community", (more like cult honestly) I'm cheering you on!
Girl, dont worry, you are the normal one here. And sounds like you are wise girl, not easily influenced by trend. Literally this trend is only in some part of the west, most other countries dont have this issue. Its indoctrination. Here, at your age, we still dont talk about sexuality. Some of us have crush yes, but not tied to sexuality at all. Imo You should tell your parents about the bullying.
I went through similar things where people would just ask my sexuality throughout high school (I’m 18 btw, I know exactly what it’s like to be 13 in this generation, I promise) and it made me so uncomfortable, especially since I am bisexual and it scared me to have people tack labels onto me when I barely even knew myself at that stage. There is nothing wrong with being straight or not caring for labels. These people are really immature, and I’m glad you’re not falling for it.
I'm recalling a time when I was in secondary school, all girls, and my friends were telling me how most girls are secretly bi, had me legit questioning my sexuality😭 now I know it was part of this trend nonsense
Literally it’s such a social contagion. In high school I was convinced by my friend group that I was bisexual because I think girls are pretty. But when it comes to anything more than a drunk peck on the cheek/lips between my girl friends and I, I wouldn’t be comfortable with a woman
I’m a lesbian, and for the longest time as a teenager I identified as “demisexual homoromantic” because I’m only attracted to women I have an emotional connection with 😭😭 I’m so embarrassed looking back at it
it's ok, demisexuality is often misunderstood, because people think it means the sexual attraction is there, but they choose not to go through with it unless they have an emotional connection with them, when it really means the sexual attraction is Not there at first when they're in a committed relationship for months to years, but it gets switched on when they hit a (theoretical) threshold of emotional connection. In other words, if one can feel sexual attraction before choosing whether or not to date a person, one is not demisexual.
@@iiovlay demisexuality is not about what a person does but whether they feel sexually attracted to someone and when. A person being cautious about who they date is not necessarily demi, because they feel sexually attracted to people, they just don’t go through with the urges. A demisexual would feel like a full asexual until they happen to find the one person that awakens their sexual attraction. But they will still not feel sexually attracted to anyone else (I think even a twin of the person they’re attracted to).
I fell for this when I was 15. I had only been on the internet for about a year and believed and fell for everything I heard because why would anyone even try to lie or persuade others? I was very convinced that I was bisexual, demisexual, a demigirl and possibly more that I wasn’t even aware of. Now thinking about it turns out I was just a tomboy who wasn’t interested in engaging sexually with anyone before marriage and I considered myself bi because I kept seeing attractive men and women on the internet.
I completely agree with you. I think the biggest issue is that people dont understand what "sexuality" actually is... Its entirely based on "sex," meaning male and female. When people start trying to define or label sexuality based off of gender-identities or preferences, it steps away from the meaning of the word and concept entirely. Sexual attraction is a biological response, and people are attracted to either males, females, both, or neither. Anything further or more specific than that is a personal preference. Theres nothing wrong with having terminology to identify those preferences, as it makes communicating those preferences easier, but it needs to be understood that those terms do not actually define one's "sexuality." Its the same as making the distinction between "Sex" (as in, the biological reality of one's sex assigned from birth) and "Gender" (as in, the social construct of gender that one identifies with). "Sexuality" is quite simple and hard-wired into us. The majority of these newer terms are not, and shouldn't be used as the primary way to define one's sexuality.
Idk when I subscribed to you but looking at your catalog of videos i figure it’s because you actually have common sense. Something many lack these days especially certain youtubers. Also, you’re very gorgeous 🥺
I'm demi romantic/sexual in terms of attraction but my sexuality is straight. I've realised this through a combination of things: I've always wanted to be in a relationship, but never really ever had a crush. The closest thing I could have to a crush would be fictional characters and even then, I know that I had largely been thinking to myself "when will i get a crush, when will i get a fictional/celebrity crush" and during that time, when a character or celebrity interested me, I basically decided that I was in love with them. I've convinced myself of having two "real person crushes", the first of which was purely because he reminded me of a tv show character I enjoyed and the second was just that I wanted to have someone to pursue. During this time, I thought that what I was experiencing was what people were experiencing when they had crushes. I thought the love at first sight and attraction people had for one another was just exaggerated for film and cinema but I still wanted a taste of it. This understanding changed when I got my first boyfriend, he had been a friend of mine for a while and he had decided to ask me out. When I had first met him, I had considered him a "crush candidate" but he had a gf at the time so that got thrown out of the window. When we first started to go out, I didn't really feel much different. I convinced myself, similar to my other "crushes" that I liked him and that I was enjoying my time. However after about 2-3 weeks of dating, something clicked and emotions and love hit me like a goddamn truck. I realised that something had triggered for me to finally feel romantic attraction and I could finally understand what all the romance films, shows and songs were about. I had heard about demi-sexuality before this, but had brushed it off because I also thought it was normal, but when I realised people could actually feel these strong emotions towards someone they barely knew, or the possibility of "love at first sight", I realised that my attraction was different to what the media likes to express as normal attraction.
I had a similar experience (even having a crush on someone who reminded me of a fictional character, except it was a book character. At least it made me learn that projecting fantasies on a real person is a bad idea), except I'm not dating anyone yet lol. I know the feeling of "yeah, he's cute, so I might like him if he turns out to have a cool personality". But now that I think about it, I don't think it needed a label. Some people just fall in love easily, and some have to get to know the person first. The term of "demisexuality" seems to just be another pointless term created to make people feel special.
This is why I go with "queer" these days... I don't need to be announcing my every preference every time I meet someone new. Buy me a drink, get me chatting, if you want to know more... As a teenager I spent years sweating as I called myself bi, wondering if I liked men enough to call myself that, wondering if some lesbians would reject me on sight when I told them. Then I went around meeting all kinds of queer people and realised labels don't matter as much as some people think. People are complex and labels can just box that complexity into something that isn't exactly truthful, so why bother? Allow yourself to change, allow yourself to experiment, don't get caught up in what you should be. Labels really became a double-edged knife. It is nice to name things, but sometimes it's easier to describe your experience in more words instead.
It's interesting to me how this feels new to people again; because all of these sexualities were very much a thing on the internet when I was a teen, which was about 10 years ago. I will say, concerning how it could be confusing for a teen to have so many options, it took a while to narrow down what my identity actually was but it was actually just kind of nice to have these niche little communities to talk about shared experiences in for a while during a time that felt like I was very alone in my feelings, and they also helped me discover myself in more than just sexuality. So I only really have positive memories concerning it.
Honestly, I'm glad I grew up before all of these identities started popping up. As a teen, I didn't know bisexuality was a thing, so I was super confused about my sexuality. I would be even more confused with this stuff.
Figuring out my bisexuality as a teen was also a pretty confusing discovery filled with inner conflicts coming from my mind, just when I had felt somewhat comfortable about being identifying as Bisexual, I started to get involved with the LGBT community and join LGBT spaces online, and I was hit with more confusion once people started telling me that I could still be gay and find a girl hot on a occasion (for context I have a big preference for men, but a small preference for women) or that I could be Pansexual, which a lot of people in the community got confused about the actual definition of it, as I have a preference or that I shouldn't identify as Bisexual as "It's transphobic", despite the definition being attracted to 2 or more genders, which then confused me about whether or not I would be attracted to the new genders. Looking back at it I feel stupid for not coming to the conclusion that I'm just a Bisexual with a preference but I was still figuring out my sexuality and being surrounded by so much new terms only made that confusion worser. I'm convinced if I was just told to only identify as either Gay, Bisexual or Straight I would have had a less confusing realisation. Luckily my friends in high school were different and told me that my identity doesn't matter as much and that I should just stick to being Bisexual, probably would've been a better idea to open up to then first before searching online.
I've seen straight people talk about their preference like they're sorry for having it... like it's boring or not as cool. There's definitely a pressure for young people online to identify as something else.
OMG. I can't imagine being soooo bored with my life that I have to be like I'm this, this this and that. For a community that doesn't care about labels they seem hell bent on labeling themselves with SO many things and others.
This is so true. It's totally normal to find someone attractive but not want to sleep with them or have any sexual attraction to them. Why is this such a rarely discussed concept? I'm straight but I had a friend try to convince me that I'm bi because there are women I find attractive. Like no, I'm just a human being, and human beings like looking at attractive people in general. A lot of the time I just analyse their hair/make up/outfit to see whether there is something striking about them that I can implement into my own style. It doesn't change the fact that I'm sexually attracted to masculine features (deep voices, broad shoulders, large hands, beards etc) and masculine energy. Our modern discourse around sexuality just makes things more confusing.
The problem is that many people think the only attraction is sexual attraction, so you feeling attracted to both women and men sound to them like you're sexually attracted to both. However, the reality is that there are multiple types of attraction, and what you are describing is aesthetic attraction. I wish more people knew this but I think it's mostly a concept that is covered in the asexual community (because we learn that we never felt sexual attraction, even though we thought we did because we felt attracted to people in other ways)
yea your just talking about aesthetic attraction vs sexual attraction. you even did it yourself - you said you find some women attractive, but then when talking about men, you specified *_sexual_* attraction. theres a difference (as you just clearly showed) but most people just lump them together which is where a lot of this confusion comes from.
today I learned that I'm omnisexual lol. Other than sexuality itself, bisexuality is indeed a spectrum. a simple one. Kinzey's scale. nearly no bisexual has the absolute same attraction to both men and women, most have a preference. So I guess all bisexual are omnisexual. If everyone is special, no one is I guess.
I always think that people are overcomplicating social opinions and preferences to try including everyone but the inclusion should be through removing boundaries and labels not introducing more checkboxes for ourselves. A few of my friends do this, put a lot of labels on themselves and tbh they are never happy coz these labels are still not enough to describe them. And that's the whole point. We all are so unique that no number of labels can be enough to "include" everyone. Rather removing labels and embracing our uniqueness while remembering we all are humans at the end of the day is the best way we can connect with each other.
HI! 16 y/o lesbian here, I have also noticed this. It's become a sort of trend nowadays, and some adults like to justify it with "well i knew when I was 12" etc. etc. but like...no you didnt, you THOUGHT when you were 12, and it only happened to be true. I can say the same thing about straight people. Especially with the rise of tiktok and social media, kids get on these apps. Kids who think they might be a little different, kids who are confused, kids going through puberty, kids just looking for acceptence. They find this community that preaches acceptance and love, and they want to be a part of it. THey will unknowingly lie jsut to feel accepted, to get an explanation for why they feel the way they do and it's incredibly damaging. I would say that Gay/Straight/Bi isnt the problem, its when kids feel the need to question their gender that it gets dangerous. Kids mutilating their bodies, and being encouraged by adults online. When I was around 11 I read a book about a female knight growing up, and in order to conceal her identity she bound her boobies. Well, I read that, and I though: I hate my boobs, theyre uncomfortable so I'm going to do this. Luckily binding my tits was more painful than just leaving them so I gave up the practice but I can't IMAGINE how much worse it is nowadays.
yes!! there was this group at my school, two were lgbt and the other 5 were straight. the two that were lgbt were the sort of 'leaders' of the group, and guess what, the 5 straight people came out as bi or gay. I have never seen them date outside of their opposite gender even though they came out to everyone, so they aren't trying to hide it. this supports what u said of them unknowingly lie to feel accepted.
I think you described my thoughts when I heard of those terms. I was super confused and I was already in my 20's. I am also surprise how all of this terms come from first world countries and I don't like that tbh. Like those trends are kinda americansplaning and then the whole world is following this stuff :P
I am a straight woman and I always found women really attractive in many ways and some of my friends tried to convince me I'm bi because I would compliment a lot hot women or good looking women in general, but the fact that I find women really attractive doesn't mean I feel something towards them. I think it is really cool that LGBT community people have freedom to be who they want now and don't have to hide, but making everything in sexuality is ultimately wrong because this was you can call ANYTHING sexuality if you find it likable or attractive.
i think asexuality originally meant people who are eternally not going to ever feel sexually attracted to anyone so even though i have gotten confused with the spectrum and maybe will try to educate myself more I truly believe asexual and aromantic is not a personality trait. because its not like they will take time and get attracted, they just do not.
Honestly I don’t subscribe to these “-sexual” identities. These feel more like preferences honestly. I’m gay and I feel like I need to give up my LGBTQIA++ card already. I don’t want to be lumped with this “community” anymore.
The excessive labeling the community does is flabbergasting to the point they have to label when they DONT feel sexual or emotional stimulation from someone. It’s mind boggling how they’re grouping people based on psychological and personal biases human have. I’m all for gay rights but what has been done is creating judgmental segregation within an “inclusive” community. … don’t get me started on how they skewed the meaning of what a woman is 😪
I also noticed that mostly women take on these weird sexuality labels. I've never seen a dude put demi sexual or sapiosexual in their bios or even call themselves those things irl
Everybody needs to feel unique and like they are going through their own hardship while also being part of a community. My fiancée watches a lot of tiktok and I do agree with you that social media has a tendency of making people (especially younger one) “auto diagnose” themselves with, in this case, sexual orientation that they would’ve otherwise believed to be simply something normal, because it is! It’s causing confusion, distress, feelings of not fitting in or being misunderstood. Children who would’ve thought to be completely normal now feel like they are different and this can have a whole bunch of psychological effects on them.. I hope this sorts itself out a bit by the time I have kids. I want them to be whoever they want to be, but I don’t want them to be stigmatized for it or put in a box because they HAVE TO fit someone’s labeling
In my opinion, all of these new "sexualities" or "orientations" are just normal things that most people experience. But we live in a time where everyone has to feel special, so they take something totally normal and apply some new made-up label to it in order to feel unique or special.
Tbh, most of these sound like Bisexuality just with extra steps. I don’t thinks it’s a good idea to have a billion labels. It just makes people on the outside looking in take the group/community less seriously. I feel like everything can be boiled down to: straight, gay, bi, and asexual. That’s it, no more, no less.
I believe a lot of people specially very young people jumped on the bandwagon without a true understanding of the already coined terms and are just further and further complicating matters. I identify (at least for now) as asexual and how I understood it more than 10 years ago was having low libido and little to no sexual attraction to anyone ever regardless of gender or sex. I can say for sure the past few years have brought a lot of new people identifying with the lable but also a lot of changes and additions most of which I consider kinda bullshit, but of course you can't create any discourse without being cancelled from all ends
totally agree. i'm pretty sure labels such as "pansexual", "omnisexual", "polysexual", "abrosexual", etc came about due to a lack of understanding of what it means to be bisexual.
I have to give praise that you're able to speak so concisely and rationally whilst still maintaining compassion for those involved in the subject of discussion. Just a regular gay guy here who doesn't identify as LGBTQ+ anymore. I have shrugged the shackles of the alphabet.
I obviously agree that anyone can find people attractive without wanting to sleep with them, but I think the girl who was talking about asexuality was implying that she has never felt the need to sleep with anyone in her life at all, which is why she was confused. There’s a difference between the two, but only the ‘aesthetic’ attraction was the one she experienced.
I agree there are too many labels now though - I’m bi myself and I honestly couldn’t give less of a shit about actually labelling myself with others lol
as a gay 18 yr old guy its annoying seeing girls be like im bi or pan but they don't even know what it means like everything is so stupid its going backwards now
I think the reason there are so many "sexualities" today is simply because people want to feel special. Oh I'm not bi, I'm pansexual Oh I'm not picky I'm sapio-redhead-curvy-sexual They make up new lables just so they can be part of some special niche group. For example I'm asexual, i can look at patience and see that aesthetically she's a beautiful woman, Some people would consider that "demi" but here's the thing i can look at a flower in the same way and see that it is beautiful does this mean I'm sexually attracted to flowers? No, just as I'm not attracted to people. I can see the beauty in someone and understand why someone would be attracted to them... but not be attracted myself. Now demisexual I always found silly, because they are still essentially hetero, bi or homo, but have a lower sex drive, or maybe just need to feel comfortable before feeling that way. Pansexual... again this is essentially bi... but extended to include people who don't identify as gender or are gender fluid... it's essentially the SJW of sexual orientations because bi isn't inclusive enough I'm just waiting for that really specific sexuality for that one weird guy on the internet who is only turned on by hairy webbed toes with athletes foot, beloning to overwight transgender thai women with blue eyes (if you can come up with a good name for that sexuality you'll not only win a cookie... I'll bake it my self for you.... and if you are that one weird guy I'll have it brought to you by said hairy webtoed thai transwoman lol)
8:07 obviously the way you interpret the word hot doesn't make you asexual, it's just an experience that person in the tiktok attributed to the asexual experience (which you can disagree with a that's valid), but that's not the whole reason a person is asexual at all.
omg I definitely needed this. I've been so confused about my sexuality for a long time, and in particular I've been gravitating towards demisexuality, and thank you for pointing out the personality thing. Cause that really is just me...but I'm gay. So like....I'm just gay sexually but i'm just not that active and prefer to just be close with someone. But I think the fact that people create labels is to help them find a word to help identify IT, cause they don't fit in with gay or straight or bi. Like with all the things going on, i just wanna be simply gay and that's just my traits when it comes to being gay. lol
Demisexuality is more for people who thought were asexual all their lives and suddenly they developed the ability to feel sexual attraction when they became very close with their friend/partner (with whom they hadn't planned on having anything sexual with). If you know you're gay because you've not identified with asexuality, chances are you aren't demisexual (but this is something only you can decide, really).
I remember seeing "demisexual" on a lot of dating profiles and being initially confused. At some point I realized that those would be people that I don't think I would want to be around.
I always thought that Demi sexual meant that you were only attracted to non-binary pop stars that hate low fat cookies and think they can talk to aliens. The more you know, I guess…
As a person who has cold hands and feet and a generally very low body temp, thank you for bringing sock slippers to light 🥹 I don’t have to feel oppressed about having cold feet anymore! 🥳
@@flyinginthewind111 i mean, i don't mind them mentioning that they're bisexual if it's relevant to the conversation but going around introducing themselves as bi to everyone they meet is where i draw the line. like, no one cares if you still fantasize about the same sex or whatever, that's tmi...
Just stumbled upon your channel and I really appreciate it, the vast majority of people are too worried to even discuss yet alone disagree with this new sentiment, really refreshing!
The thing with Asexuality is, it´s not just a preferense, and not everyone who thinks, "Oh, this guy over there is hot, but I don´t want to sleep with him." is asexual.The base for all Asexualls is that they feel no sexuall attraction at all and pretty much no sex drive. That doesn´t mean that they never want to sleep with anyone in their life, some of us do, some of us are disgusted by it and some of us are neutral towards it and just don´t care about it in general.
I’m demisexual, and honestly it’s a confusing thing because so many people define demisexuality differently. Like the girl in the video said, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly, but it’s not just having a low libido. In my case, it’s quite literally being unable to find ANYONE attractive even if I like the idea of romance. I don’t do dating apps for this exact reason, because I quite literally cannot tell if I see myself eventually becoming sexually attracted to someone even if I find them aesthetically pleasing and their personality lovely. Most people can usually mentally note and say “I could see myself with this person if we hit it off,” I can’t. I can’t simply swipe left on someone for anything other than superficial reasons like “I don’t like their hair.” I could never go on that one YT speed dating show the Button or whatever because I’d give everyone a chance automatically since I know no matter what that it would take a long ass time for me to feel anything other than friendship. For me, it’s essentially just “asexuality” with very rare exceptions. There’s a lot of gatekeeping in the asexuality community in general. In all honesty, the ace spectrum is strange because you’re able to still pursue romance and have a clear preference for what gender or multiple. I agree that labeling it as a sexuality (even though it’s supposed to be a lack of one) is rather odd. Similar to treating atheism like it’s a religion. It’s really its own thing. When it comes to being on the ace spectrum, a large part of it is if you can quite literally perceive that you feel differently regarding attraction in comparison to everyone else. So if you don’t personally feel different Patience, then you probably aren’t demisexual and don’t let anyone else dictate your labels. Most people won’t ever understand demisexuality unless they’re demisexual, and I think all sides coming to accept that is okay, because for the most part it doesn’t make that much of a difference in many cases as long as you let your partner know that sexual attraction to them may not ever happen. 🤷♀️ Tl;dr Demisexuality is very much a “if you get why it’s a thing, you probably are demisexual… if you don’t, you probably aren’t” sort of concept. If you get it, you get it… if you don’t, you don’t. I don’t think it really needs to be made a big deal though besides being its own label 🤷♀️
i finally understood mine and can ig describe them i’m biromantic demihetrosexual. I did not want to be s3xual ever with a woman, but romantically i have had a crush on a masc women. Plus i can only be s3xual with men if i am in love with them. And yeah i dont make it my personality hit labels have i lean on the right with my views (except for ab0rtion laws) and i’m planning to get married early with my partner. him being my first and last. also for me demisexuality, after i’m in love, doesn’t mean low libido at all (but i could be hypersexual due past abuse lol). however at least having an idea of who you are i guess labels can help w that. but yeah the ones who get it get it and the ones who don’t don’t. i still think it’s not smth to make one’s entire personality however conversations aren’t harmful for people who struggled (like me) to understand why they could see themselves with the opposite s3x romantically yet want a man to fall in love with and only have segz when i’m in love. While all my friends were discussing hookups, it didn’t click w me even once. It really was a struggle, not a huge one but it was to identify or even create a label for myself.
All this does is prove that these people see sexuality as a personality trait. They make it their whole sense of being. There’s nothing else to them. That’s also why in media, we rarely get good lgbt characters because being gay will literally be there whole character. They don’t understand that your sexuality isn’t what defines you.
I’m Gen Z (18) and have recently come to terms with my bisexuality. On one hand, having internet access as a teenager helped me know I wasn’t alone. On the other hand, it introduced me to all these other micro labels and terms that only confused me further. I have no issue with people using whatever words they feel describe their identity, but I also worry that it makes young people feel like they HAVE to understand and compartmentalise their sexuality/gender into perfect categories that describe them exactly. My experiences as a bisexual are bound to be very different to the experiences of other bisexuals, but we are all bisexual at the end of the day. We’ll only end up isolating ourselves more if we create too many micro labels that only we fit into perfectly. My relationship with my sexuality will surely grow as I get older and I don’t want to lock myself into tiny boxes that prevent me from exploring my identity as I grow. There doesn’t have to be a word for every part of yourself. As someone who grew up confused by all these things, i want young teens to know that it’s okay not to know.
As someone who is bi, I’ve noticed this trend too. And I think I know a reason why this is happening. We are stripping sex from any type of romance. If you look at a list of sexualities you’ll notice that a lot of them break down to someone has romantic feelings to a person of a gender, but does not want to have sex with people of that gender or vice versa. Sex should not be considered something separate from romance. They are supposed to be one. That’s why you see an uptick of polyamory and “open marriages” by the way. All because we are showing that sex and romance are not in the same group.
This is interesting. I have a question about how asexual people fit into this. As an asexual person, I can confirm after years of being in a relationship that I don't feel sexual attraction at all, but I do experience romantic attraction. There are other asexuals out there who are experiencing the same feelings. In fact, asexuality could potentially be a disorder as there are some out there describing the same symptoms. Anyhow, not all asexual people are aromantic.
@@tiffannytwo Romance is a big topic, and though there can be romance without the need for sexual attraction, I’m trying to say that I see a lot of people stripping sex from any romantic context ever. Not that it is not possible for people to have sexless romance, just that I see a lot of people removing the idea of having sex as a romantic thing.
I’d challenge that there is indeed a difference between sexual attraction, romantic attraction & aesthetic attraction, there is certainly overlap in many cases but not always. Also I’d argue the rise in polyamorous stuff is more to do with some peoples’ desire to normalise promiscuity, a byproduct of the sexual revolution in the west. It’s interesting to think about who benefits from such approaches in the long run. Throughout the world older men have won out in these types of situations for centuries so perhaps the new face of patriarchy is to normalise adultery hahaha But to clarify sex & sexual attraction should be seen as linked to (but not be the same as) romance & romantic attraction
@@ConnorCocoas I am using romance as an umbrella term. I’m saying sex and sexuality are part of the romance umbrella and not a separate thing. You can have romance without sex, but sex is still part of the general umbrella. Also I agree with you that the sexual revolution is too blame, but it’s because the sexual revolution told us that sex is different from all romance which led people to normalizing promiscuity.
I believe that all these "sexualities" are trendy because they don't want to be run- of- the- mill straight person. That's considered "boring". They don't want to be average (there's nothing wrong with average), they want to be special, unique. However, they're doing what is trendy and doesn't make them special. 🤷🏽 It's a vicious cycle.
As a bisexual, I ironically find more acceptance around my cishet friends than around my queer friends. They’re all completely accepting and loving but they also know my sexuality isn’t the most important thing about me, so we just do all the fun things friends do. Around my queer friends tho, I feel like all they see is my bisexuality, acting like anyone who is straight and cis is automatically boring and evil (not true). Plus all their convos are about gender and sexuality which is really really boring. People who identity however they want, then get on with their lives are the best people to be around
When I was in middle school, all of my friends where either lesbian gay bi Demi pan omni aro ace, or a combination of them. They’re labels would change every few months....I felt left out, so I started calling myself bi and aro and ace, and it flip flopped. I ONLY did that to fit in, I felt like they’re was something wrong with me. Everyone tried to tell me that I have “_____ energy” and no one believed I was straight, they’d quiz me on my attraction, and then GIVE ME labels, so I just went along with it, because I thought that’s how it worked....now I’m just a straight girl, nothing special. But I wanted to be special, I wanted to fit in, I didn’t wanna be “just straight” and that was exacerbated by people making fun of straight people, saying they deserve this and that. I remember having a conversation with my friend on why the straight flag is gray, and she just said “because straight people are boring”...then instantly, I no longer wanted to be who I was, I didn’t wanna be straight. So I gave myself all of these different labels to fit in, and not be boring.
I'm really sorry that was your experience, because for many LGBT+ peeps it's the same story in reverse. We went along with the straight peeps just to fit in, despite knowing there was something "wrong" with us. Only now the pendulum swing fully the opposite way, and everyone feels pressured to be LGBT+ despite not being LGBT+ just to fit in. It's not what I want, personally- I honestly still want to be straight so I can feel the sexual attraction/connection that all allosexuals say I'm missing out on (I'm ace). But I think the majority wants to be special. Ig all we can do is wait until the "fad" dies out
Before culture socially constructed the idea of LGBT, it wasn't even a thought or concern outside people with extreme biological circumstances or eccentric environmentally guided fantasies. I'm all about people having a choice to be or say what they want about themselves. But really think about the context of this. It's only possible because we live in a comfortable entitled society filled with nothing but insecurity and mental health issues because nobody seems to care or understand how to develop healthy meaningful friendships or relationships.
I agree with you. People tell me I'm "demisexual" but I disagree. Wanting an emotional connection with someone isn't a different sexuality lol. I do get attracted to people even if I don't have feelings for them, but I choose to not sleep with them.
Honestly, I think people these days just want to be unique or special, but also a member of a group. They could latch onto anything or any identity in that quest.
thank you for this patience! this needs to be said. like yes, sexuality is a spectrum but there's still a homosexual and a heterosexual at either side of the spectrum. straight people exist, gay people exist. i'm a lesbian and i would not like to be told "everyone is a bit attracted to every sex and every gender identity!" like i am not attracted to any cis men or trans men or amab nonbinary people and it just would feel very derogatory to be told that, and i'm sure it feels the same for all of you straight people being told you're gay ❤
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People confuse preference with sexuality.
Being attracted to intellegent people is NOT a sexuality, it is a preference. Someone likes red heads (he-he), someone likes tall people, rough people, gentle people, some men like curvy women, some like slim ones, etc etc etc.
We all have a preference, it's not that complicated.
Exactly a preference is a preference , and you can't have more than 1 sexuality ... that doesn't even make sense .
Agree! People afraid to say “preference” because it have a negative connotation nowadays and make up these labels.
Nowadays people confuse males bein females and vice versa. So I’m not surprise it went this far nowadays.
"he-he" is right
Hi, my name's Asthenia, how you doing? 😇
@@Astheniumn Ed Sheeran!?
I'm a woman attracted to men and I find intelligence very attractive but I just call it having high standards 🤷🏼♀️
😂😂😂
Intelligence?. Haven't you heard. That's white supremacy,European thinkings.
Like minds, to expand and enjoy conversation, ideas, and interests. That, to me is neither odd, abnormal or segregating.
@@marierex8490 I guess hookup culture has messed up a lot of people's values in relationships
Youre intelligesexual obviously :D
I honestly don't know how our society has become both hypersexual and childish.
I thought it's always been hypersexual, just that before it was mostly for the heterosexuals' gaze (like sexy girls on magazines and ads)
I would lay it at the feet of the boomers who started the "sexual revolution"
@TadanoCandy so true. For the brits, do yous remember page 3 of the Sun...I remember my mum ripping out that page when I was a child before I could see the newspaper.
@@TadanoCandy women, whether identifying as straight or queer, respond to beautiful woman just as much as men do in terms of arousal.
Tik Tok would be a good place to start.
I grew up during the Tumblr days and eating disorders & self harm were the trend with young girls. Now with Tiktok it seems to be gender identity and sexualities. I wonder what makes us more prone to this stuff?
Was that the Goth period?
Some people say that its a need for validation where there is a lack of it, and that seems to make sense
Boredom, lack of meaning in life
What nehal and crimson cloud said lol
Having no purpose or real problems in life
It’s like turning everything into “_____core aesthetic” but for human sexual behaviours
So true
Yes so true … :/
Asexuality is not human behavior. Asexuals how are sexually attracted to anyone but still want to have sex. Because you don't have to be attracted to someone he wants to feel the feel-good feelings at sex brings people. Asexual doesn't have to just not have a libido. I suggest ask you asking that the definition of asexal.
As a lesbian, I think people just have WAY too much time on their hands. It's also giving: I'm ✨️different✨️
Same
Agreed
OH BOY,
As a straight woman, I find a lot of people of either sex very attractive. Doesn't mean I want a sexual relationship with them. More often than not, I just want to paint them. I'm an artistsexual or something like that. LOL. Haven't decided if I want to paint you yet or not. Decisions, decisions.
I laughed WAY too hard at "Artistsexual" 😭😭
it’s 2023 you can definitely claim to be an Artistsexual 😭
lol same, ever since I got really into art 3 years ago, you never see people the same again. Everyone is unique and beautiful in their own way
this was a cute & funny comment! lol 🤣😂
Ooh i like this. this is great 😂😂😂
i think people forget that you don't have to be special. not everything needs a label , you're allowed to just exist. really interesting points as usual, thank you patience.
I think kids being raised on the internet these days has clued them in on how big the world is and how no one really is “special.” It feels like now how special you are is determined by how many minority groups you’re a part of, which is why everyone is adopting microlabels and why everyone puts their sexuality and mental illnesses in their social media bios (that part confuses me, I’m bisexual but I don’t want it to be the first thing people know about me when they see my social media)
non special people of the world unite!
I’m actually Oxygen-Sexual, that means I’m sexually attracted to people who breathe air.
Mouth breathers unite. ✊
I’m
Same
Oxysexual 😂
Soooo...all people? 😅
I am currently 16 and during the pandemic, when I was 14, I began to truly believe I was straight demisexual. I was even planning on “coming out”. Then my mind got back to Earth.
That’s called maturing, you have a healthy brain.
My not so very proud of story:
When I was 12 in the 2000s the trend was emo ana/mia (anorexia) on fotolog and myspace and I was influenced by that so much that I also thought I had anorexia and had to lower my weight to illogical weights, not because I had anorexia but simply because that was the trend back then, I didn’t have the dismorphia… I wanted the dismorphia.
Good thing that didn’t last me long, because we moved with my grandmother and is impossible to diet with her.
The lgtb+++++ thing is totally a trend now days, but is scary how many kids are now more influenced by this, to even get surgeries… i had access to internet yes, but back then we shared one computer in the house for … 8 people. Now teens have this tiny computer in their room and this influences them even more.
Now as an adult I realize how influenciable trends are scary.
Oh my goodness😂😂
omg are we the same person
lmao i used to think i was gay cyz the dudes around me were immature and i wasnt attracted to them, couldnt relate to them and i had a gf, then at 15 till now i met my bf, im definitely still bisexual since i still find women attractive but im def not gay lmao.
@@Lppt87 I found myself on the pro-ana side of Tumblr when I was a tween... dark days 🫡
I am black and bi but I always knew that I was bi. I had a huge crush on a girl in 5th grade and just accepted reality. Although I am bi, I do not identify as LGBT. I feel like what I see from the LGBT community does not represent me or reflect any of my beliefs. Also your sexuality should never be your personality. I even had people asking me if I was asexual because I never voiced my sexuality or liking for any other person (Johnny Depp is the only expection).
I also have an African background so I always knew to keep quiet about my sexuality.
I feel like being lgbt is the new trend and people want to be special
I agree with this and the more I look at the messages and narratives that are being pushed I just think “we live in a very unhealthy society” I mean imagine basing your ENTIRE existence over who you are sexually attracted to
I’m black and bi and feel the exact same way. The LGBT Community of today is not something want to be associated with. I really hope TikTok do get band, hopefully then some of the trendiness goes away.
@@eaglescout70 Yeah, there are accounts made by gay people against that on Twitter, saying the rainbow flag does not represent us, etc.
I'm bi. I do not identify as LGBT because I'm not gay, not lesbian and not trans. And I do not see myself as part of the "community" for the same reason as you.
Also LGBT, particularly the T nowadays, is absolutely a trend. I remember back when I went to school, every girl was bisexual, even if they only hooked up with guys, because it was the cool thing to be. But back then it was straight bi or gay, not 72 different ones
I feel the same way
people have been telling me i can’t be gay because everyone is actually bisexual…what’s wrong with them💀
They're dumb, that's what is wrong with them. You keep being gay, I'll keep being Straight and neither of us will ever be Bi no matter what those weirdos say.
What the 💀
People be cray cray
yeah, for some reason, bisexuals have a tendency to project their own experiences onto others... i used to think everyone was secretly bi, but in my defense, i was 14 at the time lol can't imagine still thinking that way as an adult.
what?... who the fuck said that?! That's more farcical than when this one prick told me I was a "trans girl in denial" just because I'm a femboy!😂
Those sexuality labels are so poorly constructed and contradictory that they seem to have been created by Marvel's writers.
preach
Bro 😭
Couldn't be more truer
Amazing
Why can’t we just say we like what we like and live our lives without labels 🤷♀️
@@hette457 so basically the new generation are so talentless that they have to be special by feeling special with labels since they can’t really do anything in life? 😂 I think we gonna extinct ourselves and global warming can move to another planet cuz we are done. 😆
@@hette457 Not really, it just specifies what people are making it easier to socialise with people more effectively. It's only narcissists and egoists who make it solipsistic.
@@hette457 I can't speak for everyone, but when you have never met another person with your sexuality, you think of yourself as broken and undeserving of love. It's thanks to finding a label and people who also relate to that label online that I found out I was normal and just had to be more careful when choosing who to date.
AND CANCELLED.
@Lala Emm What? How? Is a person who identifies as gay irl weird lol
all of these tiktoks are giving... unemployed
Or daddy was not in the picture.
😭
😂😂😂 lmao I laughed way too hard at this comment you win!!
Haven't touched grass
And have no hobbies
Saying "I'm a ..." makes people feel like they're part of a cool niche group, whereas saying "I'm attracted to intelligence" doesn't make you particularly unique or give you a subgroup with which to belong. It's like the excitement people get from taking a Hogwarts sorting hat quiz, except we've added a couple thousand more houses. It's the paradoxical desire to feel special while also wanting to fit in, this approach satisfies both desires for some people.
I'm reminded of that time Daniel Radcliffe was asked by a comedian (in exchange for about AUD$20) "Who would you turn gay for?", and he replied "Albert Einstein, because I think intelligence is sexy.", and it's as if someone took that response entirely seriously.
I think the three sexualities idea is mostly correct, but asexual should probably be added as a fourth one because there are people who are never sexually attracted to anyone no matter what. Everything described in this video would fall into one of those four categories, and they are not sexualities on their own, just a preference within an already existing sexuality.
Absolutely 💯 percent agree
@@Cora-wh1rr I would counter that it’s functionally the same even if there is a supposed technical difference it falls into the bisexual category, bisexuality being broadly defined not ultra specifically
@@Cora-wh1rrYou always are either male or female, no matter if you are trans or intersex. Whether you want to date trans/intersex people as a bi person, is a preference.
and aromantic
@Carolin Purayidom Aromantic isn't a sexuality. It just means someone doesn't feel romantic feelings, which are different from sexual attraction and someone of any sexuality can be aromantic
as a poor circulation girlie I appreciate you using your platform for awareness
Hope you get better!
As an asexual who has been identifying this way before tiktok trends, I find it fascinating how an orientation became a trend. Not being sexually attracted to anyone is one thing, but understanding subtexts and social cues is an entirely different kettle of fish. I sometimes wonder whether the new sexualities will not make it harder for the "real" queer folks who just want to live a normal life and not be treated as some token online.
I’ve noticed that a lot of young people who are now identifying as asexual are neurodivergent: autism spectrum, ADD/ADHD, OCD, sensory disorders, etc. If someone gets easily overwhelmed w/ sensory overload, then it kinda makes sense why they might not be interested in sex - or sex with other people anyway.
@@SalivatingSteve It's just a correlation that is true for some people but not for others. There are neurodivergent people of all sexual orientations.
@@pureperfection9522 This doesn't add anything meaningful to what the original comment said.
Of course it's not every single person; no one's saying it is. But if studies show that a much higher percentage of people who claim to be asexual (or have all these made-up genders and sexualities) are also neurodivergent when compared to the general public, that means something.
It either means the same thing that causes neurodivergence is linked to the cause of these identities (less likely in my opinion - though the first comment may have a point with asexuality specifically) or it means something with regards to the validity or lack thereof of the supposed identities in at least some cases (more likely imo).
Please dont say Queer. Its such a terrible word.
@@InternetMouse I'm queer, I don't fit the norm there is nothing wrong with not fitting the norm of cis (hate that word) heterosexuality
When I was 15 I had a sexual crisis because Tumblr fed me all these labels and made me unsure if I was actually heterosexual (newsflash: I am). Paired with the fact that I had a different taste in men than most of my peers I felt like I just HAD to be wrong- and so I first thought I might be bi: Turns out I confused aesthetic attraction to sexual attraction and found out I was actually repulsed by the thought of kissing a woman or anything further. Then I thought I was ace, then demisexual- turns out, that just like you, that was just my personality. I don’t exactly have to have a super close bond, but I have to have talked to that man or have heard him talk, act etc- know vaguely what he’s like.
I identified as a demisexual Heteroromantic woman for a while till I found faults with these labels and also just noticed how much confusion and headache it created in my life that was just completely unnecessary. Ever since I shed the need to chase these labels and also turning away from the leftist side in general, I’ve been a much happier person honestly.
So yeah you’re right: It DOES just create confusion and is extremely damaging and counterproductive
See, I'm asexual (specifically sex-repulsed), and I said this in another comment but I feel the need to elaborate: Asexuality, in my case, is quite literally the lack of sexuality ("a" meaning "not" for people who don't understand prefixes). I quite literally have NO sexuality. So it's more like a label, but due to the obsession with labels nowadays, I just see it as a character trait instead of something that comes out of a label maker. It's just part of me, but it doesn't define me. Labels attempt to give some sort of definition (or classification), considering everyone who makes their labels their ENTIRE personality. There's more to me than one of my character traits.
Asexual cannot be a sexuality as how can you have a sexuality but not have a sexual attraction? Its illogical.
To me if you're repulsed by anything sexual even if its mild you have something wrong with you mentally since that's objectively not normal.
I dont mean that in a demeaning way I'm just being realistic.
Why don't you just live your life and leave the label out of it? Just be single and happy. I don't see the need to have a label
@@Badookum the person literally said ”I quite literally have NO sexuality” and then said it’s more like a label. So I think you’re on the same page here. To me, it makes sense that there’s a word to describe people who do not feel any ounce of sexual feelings towards anyone ever, and don’t want to have sex. Even if they’re in the minority.
@@Badookum you sound like every person who refuses to understand asexuality.
@@sentientplant9658 Correct because its nonsensical, its made up by people who need extra attention.
When you were saying that you consider yourself very regular and that there are lots of people just like you, part of this whole discussion just clicked. The advent of the internet and global community really taking place has really taught people how big the world is and how special they are not. Some people take this as great to know that they are not alone in anything they think or feel. But I think some people (especially young people who tend to be particularly effected by the concerns of individuality) have become desperate to have a way to be different and special again.
people just want to find a group so they have something to write in their tiktok bio
Very well said and agree 100%
I agree, demisexual is just a label, not a sexuality. I'm demisexual and only attracted to women. I use the label, but I agree it is definitely not a sexuality. I don't have the hots for "feelings" so it's just a label, and I enjoy it. Having said that, asexual has a lot more in common with what makes a sexuality in the case of fully asexual people.
Demisexual= people were attracted to demi Moore back when she was hot.
Asexual is not a sexuality either
I'm asexual (specifically sex-repulsed) and I interpret it as quite literally the lack of sexuality ("a" meaning "not" for people who don't know how prefixes work). So it's more like a label for lack of sexuality, if that makes sense. But I don't think of it as a label because with the obsession with labels nowadays I'm so sick of them. It's just a part of me.
Demisexual is pretty much most people. I don't think the term should even exist. Sexuality is a lack of or who you're attracted to, not why you are.
All of it is bs, don't give into their labels. You are either straight, g^y, or bi. That's all, everything else is nonsense.
As a bi person who is wildly aware of the LGBT discourse online, trust me when I say that that this fight over labels is SO MUCH WORSE on the inside of the community. People fight over the pansexual, bisexual, omnisexual, polysexual labels all the time and I had a very hard time choosing a label for myself when I was discovering my attraction.
They are literally all the same thing: the attraction to both females and males (despite of gender identity, I’m talking purely about like sex cause its like… sexuality). But this fight over labels is exhausting. I much prefer to just call myself queer because I am so so tired of this.
(Just making sure to say tho, that asexuality is zero attraction to other people, despite of sexual characteristics, so I would consider that more of a sexuality than a label, unlike Demisexual)
Now there is even abrosexual which I have a huge problem with. To me these people are bisexuals who want a new label or attention. But the annoying thing is, they say your sexual orientation can change (which gay people have been fighting against for decades). Even by a few hours. Imagine waking up as an asexual only to be a lesbian a few hours later. How does that work on a date? If you go out with a man and then realize you are a lesbian, what happens then? 🤣
gay/bisexual/lesbian just isn't cool or radical enough for these young folk anymore. They gotta be something unique. What a mess.
gay/bisexual/lesbian just isn't cool or radical enough for these young folk anymore. They gotta be something unique. What a mess.
I'm bisexual but the community has caused me more self hatred and pain than actual homophobes, it's depressing when I can see myself becoming best friends with a homophobe but not someone who's supposedly my own kind
@@AbrasiousProductions same lol it's weird that i get along with them better than my own kind..
I find it very interesting that people don’t want to be labeled yet they create new labels for themselves
Literally
Asexual is not what the person described. Asexual at base level is when you lack a sexual attraction to people.
Also asexuals aren't romantically interested in anyone .
Thank you. I'm asexual and I was confused for a long time because of the difference between aesthetic attraction and regular attraction. I'm not a woman who prefers to be in a relationship to have sex...I just don't get feelings of sexual arousal when looking at anybody
But people aren't generally attracted to everyone they meet so why isn't it just a preference?
@@deathstar602 people aren't generally attracted to everyone, but they have felt sexual attraction to some people, right? Full asexual peeps don't know what that feels like or how it differs from other attractions like romantic or aesthetic
Asexuality is a tricky one because it involves people trying to describe a feeling ('sexual attraction') which doesn't seem to have a useful definition and can mean different things to different people.
Even I'm not sure exactly what is meant by that term separately from just thinking someone's 'attractive' generally. (And like, what the hell is 'romantic attraction'?!)
I think some people (like women, generally) just have low libidos, can't relate when people with high libidos are talking, and confuse that with thinking there's something different about them or that they're completely asexual when they're... not.
Patience going on a tangent about sock slippers is very wholesome ngl
"no, that's just my personality" sums it up 100%🤣 as a gay man, I also thought that I was demisexual (only towards men) but I was like 20 or something and still a post-adolescent. As my mom says: teenage is an illness healed in time (direct translation from Spanish, I hope it makes sense, though!)
La adolescencia es una enfermedad que sana con el tiempo.
"teenage is an illness healed in time" That is so wonderful! And healing and compassionate to think so.
The only sexualities I think are actually legitimate are gay, straight, bisexual, and asexual.
@@Ismojo. I meant gay as in not attracted to the opposite sex.
They are. Anything else is forced mental gymnastics.
Legit. People forget that bisexuals are not just attracted to men or women, it means they’re attracted to 2+ genders. Some bisexuals have preferences, some do not. Omni, pan, poly all essentially are different words for the same thing
Period ✨
@Mojo♢ im lesbian i identify as gay and so do a ton of lesbians
i love how calmly and respectfully you discuss topics like this, no malice or mockery or anything bad, just a discussion. xx
*Thank you for exposing the insanity on TikTok.*
Between sock slippers and flip flops, Patience just needs to do a deep dive on footwear, its history, etc.😂
Seriously, I would watch it!
After hearing that she wants to gas people who wear flip fliops, i too would be interested 🤣
I've known about slipper socks for 2 decades (they give them away in hospitals if you need to remove your shoes
Yes next video idea
😂
Out of all the trends I've seen, the obsession with sexual orientation is definitely the weirdest.
And the worst imo
Me and my girlfriend just talked about this. This new stream of various sexualities has basically been straight white women finding a way to force themselves into the LGBT community without actually being LGBT. A lot of white people have started to feel that being straight and white is bad or boring so to spice it up instead of just lying and saying you're bisexual like some women used to you don't even have to pretend to be attracted to women you can just say you like smart guys (sapiosexual) now you're LGBT and not just white.
You took the words right out of my mouth! That’s what I’ve been thinking, when I go in TikTok and social media it’s mostly white people who put these label on themselves. Please stop with the self hatred and white guilt
I’ve seen various levels of ridiculousness from all genders and races, straight white women are not the only ones - if anything, from what I have experienced they are way less about inventing labels to be part of groups. If we just look at the pride flag variations, there’s no straight white woman version of any flag but theres bipoc version, trans version, bipoc trans version, the list goes on on these variations. Everyone wants a niche and their own thing andcreating a new flag or acronym to represent their slice of the rainbow. So your opinion is incorrect based on what actual content is being created and pushed
I am bi ( and a white woman) and I don't like to tell people I am bi in real life because I don't want to be associated with these clowns.
Yup, it’s the crowd that will do anything to rebel against the traditional. It’s a phase for the majority of them, but when LGBT umbrella essentially is open to anything and everyone it was bound to happen. These girls get a lot of social clout as well being something “other” than straight. These new labels are essentially the emo kids of a generation ago
That’s a problem when we denigrate “white cishet” people. If it was accepted to not be a BIPOC queergender sapiosexual, they wouldn’t be trying to be something they’re not.
Tbh, I had to accept myself that Im straight. I find some girls hot but I dont want to be together with them, I want to be them. Idk why but probably social media and friends made me fee weird for not being Lgbtq.... Like its wrong to be straight? It went as far as me trying to desperately find something lgbtq to identfy as, in order to fit in. I was in denial of being normal and basic. Now I love it, I hate how tik tok says being normal is boring, its not. Its not as extravagant but its comfortable and simple. There are beauty in little things and you feel less stressed about everything. Its so easy to be happy and not jealous at all because some flowers and good book can fulfil me so much.
I thought I was "Demi-Sexual" until I listened to Bill Burrs podcast, he was like "Demi-sexuals are *mumble reads definition*...oh so you're just well adjusted?"
changed my perspective instantly. I then started going to the gym.
Lmaooo
Todays society is also extremely hyper focused and obsessed w sexual identity and labels to a point where they let it define them entirely and w some it becomes their personality. it’s sad like hey there’s more to u and u don’t have to justify/obsess over that single aspect of yourself constantly :/
So far, its only in the west. Go outside the west and you'll discover some world that are still innocent and oblivious of any of that contamination
Well ofc, that is what society has taught us since day one.
If you're a straight man, you're like this. If you're a gay man, you're like that.
We need to acknowledge that there's an entire industry built around "straight macho man" and "straight feminine woman", and that it perpetuates the notion that you are your sexuality, instead of it just being a small part of who you are (which how I personally think we should perceive it).
Man I'm only 26 and I had a hard time coming out when I was in high school. Back in the late 2000s and early 2010s it was definitely becoming more known and talked about but it wasn't like it is today with every other teenager being trans and lgbt. It's so crazy to see being gay becoming a trend and so many kids identifying as "queer" which was used as a slur towards me and other gay men at the time. Seeing cis girls who identify as "queer" using words like the F slur on tiktok and thinking its okay just bc they're queer is so offensive.
In the 2000s the trend was to be emo/scene, now it's definitely trendy to be lgbt. We gotta stop letting this shit fly.
True but I think it has something to do with the fact that society is more tolerant now therfore more people will identify as queer than before. I finally came out as bi to my close circle a couple years ago because I was raised in a not so tolerant country. I know the trend is annoying but at least we aren't hated if that makes sense.
@@nomi5466 “Queer” was like the n-word, why are people using this word? For decades this was a derogatory word.
I didn't know of the history of the word my apologies. I just heard it a lot at uni and thought it was okay to use.
@@nomi5466 Yeah, queer was used as a derogatory slur mostly towards gay men. I got called that slur a LOT in high school. For some reason in recent years Gen Z decided to use queer as an umbrella term, and I don't know how to feel about it.
Women are not "cis".
Welcome to the slipper sock community. We accept you and we love you.
Thank you for putting into words what’s always been in my head. You are so eloquent!
I’m a young person myself and I remember a few years in school literally 75+% of the girls identified as bi one after the other. The social contagion phenomenon you mentioned 100% on point. In reality, I think that this whole LGBTQAI++++++ thing is really just a trend that people jump on, and because the requirements of entry are so vague, many people fit in to whichever sexual dichotomy they choose.
People just need to figure themselves out and this is how they do it nowadays. The only problem I have with this is when it supersedes things like TikTok and excludes people who don’t fit into these new categories from opportunities. I’m a straight white guy in my last year of highschool. I tried applying for scholarships but many of them were for LGBTQ people only. Out of a dozen scholarships I think I qualified for one or two because of my skin tone and sexual flavour.
Ok, I'm someone that has no interest in dating, marriage or intercourse. But I don't claim to be aromatic or asexual (especially when I find a lot of people attractive). I don't label my orientation. I think it's easier to say "I don't care about romance" rather than saying "I'm aromatic". A lot of people probably won't understand or they'll just roll their eyes out of pure annoyance.
Exactly the asexual thing doesn't make sense and for the longest time asexual meant animals that can reproduce without a sexual partner so I was confused when ppl started using it like what???
Hey Patience, would love to see your view on the video reacted to by many 'what are we doing to white people' and some of Charlie's videos including antiasianess and antiblackness between both and how the media do not speak about it as often, would love to get the word out and get some insight from your respectable opinion, if not i understand, thanks for reading anyway and love your channel so much its very relaxing
Omg I'd love to see that
Hi patience, I am a 13year old girl and thank you so much for this video, I have been struggling a lot at school due to this and its hard, your totally right kids in my class are exactly like this (mostly girls) everyone thinks they are from some type of sexality group and it seems to be the new trend, at first I didn't care much because it wasn't something I would be into but girls started asking what my sexuality is !! I personally just Identify as straight so I told them straight and they said that I wouldn't stay straight in this class and that I was boring.
There was also a girl in my class who I could tell had a crush on me and kept asking me what my sexuality is and I told her straight and one day I was a bit creeped out because I just wanted to be friends so then she sent her friend to go beat me up🥺😞 luckily the teacher stopped it but I have also been bullied for not wanting a sexual relationship yet, and they are giving me all of these labels but your video have me some confidence that there are some people out there who think the same as me so thank you 💖
Also I would like you to make a video explaining your opinion on toddlers watching LGBTQ + shows
Please don’t let the bullies get to you ❤️ you’re really intelligent for thinking for yourself and not following trends.
We have finally reached the point where those who would’ve been bullied are now the bullies
Hang in there and don’t let anyone force you to be anything you’re not
Live your truth! ...I know woke types use that phrase all the time, but you can use it too! As a non-straight that refuses to be part of the LGBT "community", (more like cult honestly) I'm cheering you on!
Girl, dont worry, you are the normal one here. And sounds like you are wise girl, not easily influenced by trend.
Literally this trend is only in some part of the west, most other countries dont have this issue. Its indoctrination. Here, at your age, we still dont talk about sexuality. Some of us have crush yes, but not tied to sexuality at all.
Imo You should tell your parents about the bullying.
I went through similar things where people would just ask my sexuality throughout high school (I’m 18 btw, I know exactly what it’s like to be 13 in this generation, I promise) and it made me so uncomfortable, especially since I am bisexual and it scared me to have people tack labels onto me when I barely even knew myself at that stage. There is nothing wrong with being straight or not caring for labels. These people are really immature, and I’m glad you’re not falling for it.
I'm recalling a time when I was in secondary school, all girls, and my friends were telling me how most girls are secretly bi, had me legit questioning my sexuality😭 now I know it was part of this trend nonsense
Literally it’s such a social contagion. In high school I was convinced by my friend group that I was bisexual because I think girls are pretty. But when it comes to anything more than a drunk peck on the cheek/lips between my girl friends and I, I wouldn’t be comfortable with a woman
I’m a lesbian, and for the longest time as a teenager I identified as “demisexual homoromantic” because I’m only attracted to women I have an emotional connection with 😭😭 I’m so embarrassed looking back at it
it's ok, demisexuality is often misunderstood, because people think it means the sexual attraction is there, but they choose not to go through with it unless they have an emotional connection with them, when it really means the sexual attraction is Not there at first when they're in a committed relationship for months to years, but it gets switched on when they hit a (theoretical) threshold of emotional connection. In other words, if one can feel sexual attraction before choosing whether or not to date a person, one is not demisexual.
THIS. Why are we making our sexualities an aesthetic. They could've stopped at 'cottagecore'
@@iiovlay demisexuality is not about what a person does but whether they feel sexually attracted to someone and when. A person being cautious about who they date is not necessarily demi, because they feel sexually attracted to people, they just don’t go through with the urges. A demisexual would feel like a full asexual until they happen to find the one person that awakens their sexual attraction. But they will still not feel sexually attracted to anyone else (I think even a twin of the person they’re attracted to).
I fell for this when I was 15. I had only been on the internet for about a year and believed and fell for everything I heard because why would anyone even try to lie or persuade others? I was very convinced that I was bisexual, demisexual, a demigirl and possibly more that I wasn’t even aware of. Now thinking about it turns out I was just a tomboy who wasn’t interested in engaging sexually with anyone before marriage and I considered myself bi because I kept seeing attractive men and women on the internet.
I completely agree with you. I think the biggest issue is that people dont understand what "sexuality" actually is... Its entirely based on "sex," meaning male and female. When people start trying to define or label sexuality based off of gender-identities or preferences, it steps away from the meaning of the word and concept entirely. Sexual attraction is a biological response, and people are attracted to either males, females, both, or neither. Anything further or more specific than that is a personal preference. Theres nothing wrong with having terminology to identify those preferences, as it makes communicating those preferences easier, but it needs to be understood that those terms do not actually define one's "sexuality." Its the same as making the distinction between "Sex" (as in, the biological reality of one's sex assigned from birth) and "Gender" (as in, the social construct of gender that one identifies with). "Sexuality" is quite simple and hard-wired into us. The majority of these newer terms are not, and shouldn't be used as the primary way to define one's sexuality.
Idk when I subscribed to you but looking at your catalog of videos i figure it’s because you actually have common sense. Something many lack these days especially certain youtubers. Also, you’re very gorgeous 🥺
right? there’s so many woke things going on that if you have any sense of stability (morally) you’re a target lol
I'm demi romantic/sexual in terms of attraction but my sexuality is straight. I've realised this through a combination of things: I've always wanted to be in a relationship, but never really ever had a crush. The closest thing I could have to a crush would be fictional characters and even then, I know that I had largely been thinking to myself "when will i get a crush, when will i get a fictional/celebrity crush" and during that time, when a character or celebrity interested me, I basically decided that I was in love with them. I've convinced myself of having two "real person crushes", the first of which was purely because he reminded me of a tv show character I enjoyed and the second was just that I wanted to have someone to pursue. During this time, I thought that what I was experiencing was what people were experiencing when they had crushes. I thought the love at first sight and attraction people had for one another was just exaggerated for film and cinema but I still wanted a taste of it.
This understanding changed when I got my first boyfriend, he had been a friend of mine for a while and he had decided to ask me out. When I had first met him, I had considered him a "crush candidate" but he had a gf at the time so that got thrown out of the window. When we first started to go out, I didn't really feel much different. I convinced myself, similar to my other "crushes" that I liked him and that I was enjoying my time. However after about 2-3 weeks of dating, something clicked and emotions and love hit me like a goddamn truck.
I realised that something had triggered for me to finally feel romantic attraction and I could finally understand what all the romance films, shows and songs were about.
I had heard about demi-sexuality before this, but had brushed it off because I also thought it was normal, but when I realised people could actually feel these strong emotions towards someone they barely knew, or the possibility of "love at first sight", I realised that my attraction was different to what the media likes to express as normal attraction.
I had a similar experience (even having a crush on someone who reminded me of a fictional character, except it was a book character. At least it made me learn that projecting fantasies on a real person is a bad idea), except I'm not dating anyone yet lol. I know the feeling of "yeah, he's cute, so I might like him if he turns out to have a cool personality".
But now that I think about it, I don't think it needed a label. Some people just fall in love easily, and some have to get to know the person first. The term of "demisexuality" seems to just be another pointless term created to make people feel special.
This is why I go with "queer" these days... I don't need to be announcing my every preference every time I meet someone new. Buy me a drink, get me chatting, if you want to know more...
As a teenager I spent years sweating as I called myself bi, wondering if I liked men enough to call myself that, wondering if some lesbians would reject me on sight when I told them. Then I went around meeting all kinds of queer people and realised labels don't matter as much as some people think. People are complex and labels can just box that complexity into something that isn't exactly truthful, so why bother? Allow yourself to change, allow yourself to experiment, don't get caught up in what you should be. Labels really became a double-edged knife. It is nice to name things, but sometimes it's easier to describe your experience in more words instead.
It's interesting to me how this feels new to people again; because all of these sexualities were very much a thing on the internet when I was a teen, which was about 10 years ago.
I will say, concerning how it could be confusing for a teen to have so many options, it took a while to narrow down what my identity actually was but it was actually just kind of nice to have these niche little communities to talk about shared experiences in for a while during a time that felt like I was very alone in my feelings, and they also helped me discover myself in more than just sexuality. So I only really have positive memories concerning it.
Honestly, I'm glad I grew up before all of these identities started popping up. As a teen, I didn't know bisexuality was a thing, so I was super confused about my sexuality. I would be even more confused with this stuff.
Figuring out my bisexuality as a teen was also a pretty confusing discovery filled with inner conflicts coming from my mind, just when I had felt somewhat comfortable about being identifying as Bisexual, I started to get involved with the LGBT community and join LGBT spaces online, and I was hit with more confusion once people started telling me that I could still be gay and find a girl hot on a occasion (for context I have a big preference for men, but a small preference for women) or that I could be Pansexual, which a lot of people in the community got confused about the actual definition of it, as I have a preference or that I shouldn't identify as Bisexual as "It's transphobic", despite the definition being attracted to 2 or more genders, which then confused me about whether or not I would be attracted to the new genders.
Looking back at it I feel stupid for not coming to the conclusion that I'm just a Bisexual with a preference but I was still figuring out my sexuality and being surrounded by so much new terms only made that confusion worser. I'm convinced if I was just told to only identify as either Gay, Bisexual or Straight I would have had a less confusing realisation. Luckily my friends in high school were different and told me that my identity doesn't matter as much and that I should just stick to being Bisexual, probably would've been a better idea to open up to then first before searching online.
I've seen straight people talk about their preference like they're sorry for having it... like it's boring or not as cool. There's definitely a pressure for young people online to identify as something else.
OMG. I can't imagine being soooo bored with my life that I have to be like I'm this, this this and that. For a community that doesn't care about labels they seem hell bent on labeling themselves with SO many things and others.
This is so true. It's totally normal to find someone attractive but not want to sleep with them or have any sexual attraction to them. Why is this such a rarely discussed concept?
I'm straight but I had a friend try to convince me that I'm bi because there are women I find attractive. Like no, I'm just a human being, and human beings like looking at attractive people in general. A lot of the time I just analyse their hair/make up/outfit to see whether there is something striking about them that I can implement into my own style. It doesn't change the fact that I'm sexually attracted to masculine features (deep voices, broad shoulders, large hands, beards etc) and masculine energy.
Our modern discourse around sexuality just makes things more confusing.
The problem is that many people think the only attraction is sexual attraction, so you feeling attracted to both women and men sound to them like you're sexually attracted to both. However, the reality is that there are multiple types of attraction, and what you are describing is aesthetic attraction. I wish more people knew this but I think it's mostly a concept that is covered in the asexual community (because we learn that we never felt sexual attraction, even though we thought we did because we felt attracted to people in other ways)
yea your just talking about aesthetic attraction vs sexual attraction. you even did it yourself - you said you find some women attractive, but then when talking about men, you specified *_sexual_* attraction. theres a difference (as you just clearly showed) but most people just lump them together which is where a lot of this confusion comes from.
today I learned that I'm omnisexual lol.
Other than sexuality itself, bisexuality is indeed a spectrum. a simple one. Kinzey's scale. nearly no bisexual has the absolute same attraction to both men and women, most have a preference. So I guess all bisexual are omnisexual. If everyone is special, no one is I guess.
tbh as a bisexual myself i don't have a preference. I'm just not attracted to people who think they're the opposing sex/gender. (not into trans)
I always think that people are overcomplicating social opinions and preferences to try including everyone but the inclusion should be through removing boundaries and labels not introducing more checkboxes for ourselves. A few of my friends do this, put a lot of labels on themselves and tbh they are never happy coz these labels are still not enough to describe them.
And that's the whole point. We all are so unique that no number of labels can be enough to "include" everyone. Rather removing labels and embracing our uniqueness while remembering we all are humans at the end of the day is the best way we can connect with each other.
HI! 16 y/o lesbian here, I have also noticed this. It's become a sort of trend nowadays, and some adults like to justify it with "well i knew when I was 12" etc. etc. but like...no you didnt, you THOUGHT when you were 12, and it only happened to be true. I can say the same thing about straight people. Especially with the rise of tiktok and social media, kids get on these apps. Kids who think they might be a little different, kids who are confused, kids going through puberty, kids just looking for acceptence. They find this community that preaches acceptance and love, and they want to be a part of it. THey will unknowingly lie jsut to feel accepted, to get an explanation for why they feel the way they do and it's incredibly damaging. I would say that Gay/Straight/Bi isnt the problem, its when kids feel the need to question their gender that it gets dangerous. Kids mutilating their bodies, and being encouraged by adults online. When I was around 11 I read a book about a female knight growing up, and in order to conceal her identity she bound her boobies. Well, I read that, and I though: I hate my boobs, theyre uncomfortable so I'm going to do this. Luckily binding my tits was more painful than just leaving them so I gave up the practice but I can't IMAGINE how much worse it is nowadays.
yes!! there was this group at my school, two were lgbt and the other 5 were straight. the two that were lgbt were the sort of 'leaders' of the group, and guess what, the 5 straight people came out as bi or gay. I have never seen them date outside of their opposite gender even though they came out to everyone, so they aren't trying to hide it. this supports what u said of them unknowingly lie to feel accepted.
Just wait until you find out about the MAPs.
That is Something that deserves its own video
As a gay man sometimes I just don't wanna be part of the LGBT+ community anymore because it's so confusing
I think you described my thoughts when I heard of those terms. I was super confused and I was already in my 20's. I am also surprise how all of this terms come from first world countries and I don't like that tbh. Like those trends are kinda americansplaning and then the whole world is following this stuff :P
I am a straight woman and I always found women really attractive in many ways and some of my friends tried to convince me I'm bi because I would compliment a lot hot women or good looking women in general, but the fact that I find women really attractive doesn't mean I feel something towards them. I think it is really cool that LGBT community people have freedom to be who they want now and don't have to hide, but making everything in sexuality is ultimately wrong because this was you can call ANYTHING sexuality if you find it likable or attractive.
i think asexuality originally meant people who are eternally not going to ever feel sexually attracted to anyone so even though i have gotten confused with the spectrum and maybe will try to educate myself more I truly believe asexual and aromantic is not a personality trait. because its not like they will take time and get attracted, they just do not.
Honestly I don’t subscribe to these “-sexual” identities. These feel more like preferences honestly. I’m gay and I feel like I need to give up my LGBTQIA++ card already. I don’t want to be lumped with this “community” anymore.
The excessive labeling the community does is flabbergasting to the point they have to label when they DONT feel sexual or emotional stimulation from someone. It’s mind boggling how they’re grouping people based on psychological and personal biases human have. I’m all for gay rights but what has been done is creating judgmental segregation within an “inclusive” community.
… don’t get me started on how they skewed the meaning of what a woman is 😪
I also noticed that mostly women take on these weird sexuality labels. I've never seen a dude put demi sexual or sapiosexual in their bios or even call themselves those things irl
Sometimes online I'd see things like "he's so gender!" or "giving me gender envy" and I get the strangest feeling from it lol
Mark my words. Soon cousin phucking will make a comeback. 😂 The ground work has been laid. You don't have to come out, you keep it in the family.
"He's so gender" is funny asf these people are crazyyy
Everybody needs to feel unique and like they are going through their own hardship while also being part of a community. My fiancée watches a lot of tiktok and I do agree with you that social media has a tendency of making people (especially younger one) “auto diagnose” themselves with, in this case, sexual orientation that they would’ve otherwise believed to be simply something normal, because it is!
It’s causing confusion, distress, feelings of not fitting in or being misunderstood. Children who would’ve thought to be completely normal now feel like they are different and this can have a whole bunch of psychological effects on them..
I hope this sorts itself out a bit by the time I have kids. I want them to be whoever they want to be, but I don’t want them to be stigmatized for it or put in a box because they HAVE TO fit someone’s labeling
No, You wouldnt want them to be whoever they want to be.
In my opinion, all of these new "sexualities" or "orientations" are just normal things that most people experience. But we live in a time where everyone has to feel special, so they take something totally normal and apply some new made-up label to it in order to feel unique or special.
Tbh, most of these sound like Bisexuality just with extra steps. I don’t thinks it’s a good idea to have a billion labels. It just makes people on the outside looking in take the group/community less seriously. I feel like everything can be boiled down to: straight, gay, bi, and asexual. That’s it, no more, no less.
I believe a lot of people specially very young people jumped on the bandwagon without a true understanding of the already coined terms and are just further and further complicating matters.
I identify (at least for now) as asexual and how I understood it more than 10 years ago was having low libido and little to no sexual attraction to anyone ever regardless of gender or sex.
I can say for sure the past few years have brought a lot of new people identifying with the lable but also a lot of changes and additions most of which I consider kinda bullshit, but of course you can't create any discourse without being cancelled from all ends
totally agree. i'm pretty sure labels such as "pansexual", "omnisexual", "polysexual", "abrosexual", etc came about due to a lack of understanding of what it means to be bisexual.
@@cmlkhf even the term 'bisexual' gets on my nerves because that has become a trend with young women
I have to give praise that you're able to speak so concisely and rationally whilst still maintaining compassion for those involved in the subject of discussion. Just a regular gay guy here who doesn't identify as LGBTQ+ anymore. I have shrugged the shackles of the alphabet.
I obviously agree that anyone can find people attractive without wanting to sleep with them, but I think the girl who was talking about asexuality was implying that she has never felt the need to sleep with anyone in her life at all, which is why she was confused. There’s a difference between the two, but only the ‘aesthetic’ attraction was the one she experienced.
I agree there are too many labels now though - I’m bi myself and I honestly couldn’t give less of a shit about actually labelling myself with others lol
You are so refreshingly common sense. You've never made me regret subscribing to your channel for over a year.
Facts here: 2 genders - man and woman
3 sexualities: straight, gay and bi
as a gay 18 yr old guy its annoying seeing girls be like im bi or pan but they don't even know what it means like everything is so stupid its going backwards now
I think the reason there are so many "sexualities" today is simply because people want to feel special.
Oh I'm not bi, I'm pansexual
Oh I'm not picky I'm sapio-redhead-curvy-sexual
They make up new lables just so they can be part of some special niche group.
For example I'm asexual, i can look at patience and see that aesthetically she's a beautiful woman, Some people would consider that "demi" but here's the thing i can look at a flower in the same way and see that it is beautiful does this mean I'm sexually attracted to flowers? No, just as I'm not attracted to people. I can see the beauty in someone and understand why someone would be attracted to them... but not be attracted myself.
Now demisexual I always found silly, because they are still essentially hetero, bi or homo, but have a lower sex drive, or maybe just need to feel comfortable before feeling that way.
Pansexual... again this is essentially bi... but extended to include people who don't identify as gender or are gender fluid... it's essentially the SJW of sexual orientations because bi isn't inclusive enough
I'm just waiting for that really specific sexuality for that one weird guy on the internet who is only turned on by hairy webbed toes with athletes foot, beloning to overwight transgender thai women with blue eyes (if you can come up with a good name for that sexuality you'll not only win a cookie... I'll bake it my self for you.... and if you are that one weird guy I'll have it brought to you by said hairy webtoed thai transwoman lol)
8:07 obviously the way you interpret the word hot doesn't make you asexual, it's just an experience that person in the tiktok attributed to the asexual experience (which you can disagree with a that's valid), but that's not the whole reason a person is asexual at all.
omg I definitely needed this. I've been so confused about my sexuality for a long time, and in particular I've been gravitating towards demisexuality, and thank you for pointing out the personality thing. Cause that really is just me...but I'm gay. So like....I'm just gay sexually but i'm just not that active and prefer to just be close with someone. But I think the fact that people create labels is to help them find a word to help identify IT, cause they don't fit in with gay or straight or bi. Like with all the things going on, i just wanna be simply gay and that's just my traits when it comes to being gay. lol
Demisexuality is more for people who thought were asexual all their lives and suddenly they developed the ability to feel sexual attraction when they became very close with their friend/partner (with whom they hadn't planned on having anything sexual with). If you know you're gay because you've not identified with asexuality, chances are you aren't demisexual (but this is something only you can decide, really).
I remember seeing "demisexual" on a lot of dating profiles and being initially confused. At some point I realized that those would be people that I don't think I would want to be around.
I always thought that Demi sexual meant that you were only attracted to non-binary pop stars that hate low fat cookies and think they can talk to aliens.
The more you know, I guess…
As a person who has cold hands and feet and a generally very low body temp, thank you for bringing sock slippers to light 🥹 I don’t have to feel oppressed about having cold feet anymore! 🥳
when a straight couple who dress a lil different call themselves queer 🙂
or when a normal looking straight couple refer to their relationship as "straight passing" because one of them is bisexual or "non-binary" 🙂🔫
@@cmlkhf that drives me crazy. Like when someone comes out as bisexual when they are married in a straight relationship. What is the pointttt
@@flyinginthewind111 i mean, i don't mind them mentioning that they're bisexual if it's relevant to the conversation but going around introducing themselves as bi to everyone they meet is where i draw the line. like, no one cares if you still fantasize about the same sex or whatever, that's tmi...
Just stumbled upon your channel and I really appreciate it, the vast majority of people are too worried to even discuss yet alone disagree with this new sentiment, really refreshing!
i think people, on tiktok especially are very obsessed with labels and it’s getting a bit too much if i’m being honest
The thing with Asexuality is, it´s not just a preferense, and not everyone who thinks, "Oh, this guy over there is hot, but I don´t want to sleep with him." is asexual.The base for all Asexualls is that they feel no sexuall attraction at all and pretty much no sex drive. That doesn´t mean that they never want to sleep with anyone in their life, some of us do, some of us are disgusted by it and some of us are neutral towards it and just don´t care about it in general.
I’m demisexual, and honestly it’s a confusing thing because so many people define demisexuality differently. Like the girl in the video said, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly, but it’s not just having a low libido. In my case, it’s quite literally being unable to find ANYONE attractive even if I like the idea of romance. I don’t do dating apps for this exact reason, because I quite literally cannot tell if I see myself eventually becoming sexually attracted to someone even if I find them aesthetically pleasing and their personality lovely. Most people can usually mentally note and say “I could see myself with this person if we hit it off,” I can’t. I can’t simply swipe left on someone for anything other than superficial reasons like “I don’t like their hair.” I could never go on that one YT speed dating show the Button or whatever because I’d give everyone a chance automatically since I know no matter what that it would take a long ass time for me to feel anything other than friendship. For me, it’s essentially just “asexuality” with very rare exceptions.
There’s a lot of gatekeeping in the asexuality community in general. In all honesty, the ace spectrum is strange because you’re able to still pursue romance and have a clear preference for what gender or multiple. I agree that labeling it as a sexuality (even though it’s supposed to be a lack of one) is rather odd. Similar to treating atheism like it’s a religion. It’s really its own thing. When it comes to being on the ace spectrum, a large part of it is if you can quite literally perceive that you feel differently regarding attraction in comparison to everyone else. So if you don’t personally feel different Patience, then you probably aren’t demisexual and don’t let anyone else dictate your labels. Most people won’t ever understand demisexuality unless they’re demisexual, and I think all sides coming to accept that is okay, because for the most part it doesn’t make that much of a difference in many cases as long as you let your partner know that sexual attraction to them may not ever happen. 🤷♀️
Tl;dr
Demisexuality is very much a “if you get why it’s a thing, you probably are demisexual… if you don’t, you probably aren’t” sort of concept. If you get it, you get it… if you don’t, you don’t. I don’t think it really needs to be made a big deal though besides being its own label 🤷♀️
Excellent explanation, I’m not Demi I’m ace but your explanation is better than mine
i finally understood mine and can ig describe them
i’m biromantic demihetrosexual. I did not want to be s3xual ever with a woman, but romantically i have had a crush on a masc women. Plus i can only be s3xual with men if i am in love with them.
And yeah i dont make it my personality hit labels have
i lean on the right with my views (except for ab0rtion laws) and i’m planning to get married early with my partner. him being my first and last. also for me demisexuality, after i’m in love, doesn’t mean low libido at all (but i could be hypersexual due past abuse lol). however at least having an idea of who you are i guess labels can help w that.
but yeah the ones who get it get it and the ones who don’t don’t. i still think it’s not smth to make one’s entire personality however conversations aren’t harmful for people who struggled (like me) to understand why they could see themselves with the opposite s3x romantically yet want a man to fall in love with and only have segz when i’m in love. While all my friends were discussing hookups, it didn’t click w me even once. It really was a struggle, not a huge one but it was to identify or even create a label for myself.
All this does is prove that these people see sexuality as a personality trait. They make it their whole sense of being. There’s nothing else to them. That’s also why in media, we rarely get good lgbt characters because being gay will literally be there whole character. They don’t understand that your sexuality isn’t what defines you.
I’m Gen Z (18) and have recently come to terms with my bisexuality. On one hand, having internet access as a teenager helped me know I wasn’t alone. On the other hand, it introduced me to all these other micro labels and terms that only confused me further. I have no issue with people using whatever words they feel describe their identity, but I also worry that it makes young people feel like they HAVE to understand and compartmentalise their sexuality/gender into perfect categories that describe them exactly. My experiences as a bisexual are bound to be very different to the experiences of other bisexuals, but we are all bisexual at the end of the day. We’ll only end up isolating ourselves more if we create too many micro labels that only we fit into perfectly. My relationship with my sexuality will surely grow as I get older and I don’t want to lock myself into tiny boxes that prevent me from exploring my identity as I grow. There doesn’t have to be a word for every part of yourself. As someone who grew up confused by all these things, i want young teens to know that it’s okay not to know.
we are not all bisexual.
As someone who is bi, I’ve noticed this trend too. And I think I know a reason why this is happening. We are stripping sex from any type of romance. If you look at a list of sexualities you’ll notice that a lot of them break down to someone has romantic feelings to a person of a gender, but does not want to have sex with people of that gender or vice versa. Sex should not be considered something separate from romance. They are supposed to be one. That’s why you see an uptick of polyamory and “open marriages” by the way. All because we are showing that sex and romance are not in the same group.
This is interesting. I have a question about how asexual people fit into this. As an asexual person, I can confirm after years of being in a relationship that I don't feel sexual attraction at all, but I do experience romantic attraction.
There are other asexuals out there who are experiencing the same feelings. In fact, asexuality could potentially be a disorder as there are some out there describing the same symptoms. Anyhow, not all asexual people are aromantic.
@@tiffannytwo Romance is a big topic, and though there can be romance without the need for sexual attraction, I’m trying to say that I see a lot of people stripping sex from any romantic context ever. Not that it is not possible for people to have sexless romance, just that I see a lot of people removing the idea of having sex as a romantic thing.
I’d challenge that there is indeed a difference between sexual attraction, romantic attraction & aesthetic attraction, there is certainly overlap in many cases but not always.
Also I’d argue the rise in polyamorous stuff is more to do with some peoples’ desire to normalise promiscuity, a byproduct of the sexual revolution in the west. It’s interesting to think about who benefits from such approaches in the long run. Throughout the world older men have won out in these types of situations for centuries so perhaps the new face of patriarchy is to normalise adultery hahaha
But to clarify sex & sexual attraction should be seen as linked to (but not be the same as) romance & romantic attraction
@@ConnorCocoas I am using romance as an umbrella term. I’m saying sex and sexuality are part of the romance umbrella and not a separate thing. You can have romance without sex, but sex is still part of the general umbrella. Also I agree with you that the sexual revolution is too blame, but it’s because the sexual revolution told us that sex is different from all romance which led people to normalizing promiscuity.
@@dallasgrey4247 oh I understand you now, thank you for clarifying. I like that, it makes good sense. ☺️
I believe that all these "sexualities" are trendy because they don't want to be run- of- the- mill straight person. That's considered "boring". They don't want to be average (there's nothing wrong with average), they want to be special, unique. However, they're doing what is trendy and doesn't make them special. 🤷🏽 It's a vicious cycle.
As a bisexual, I ironically find more acceptance around my cishet friends than around my queer friends. They’re all completely accepting and loving but they also know my sexuality isn’t the most important thing about me, so we just do all the fun things friends do. Around my queer friends tho, I feel like all they see is my bisexuality, acting like anyone who is straight and cis is automatically boring and evil (not true). Plus all their convos are about gender and sexuality which is really really boring. People who identity however they want, then get on with their lives are the best people to be around
I agree. But, really, what is 'average'? Just don't believe that can ever be defined ... and I don't think it should be.
Don't forget that there's also social pressure to be LGBT nowadays. That can also be a factor in this apparent desire for labels
When I was in middle school, all of my friends where either lesbian gay bi Demi pan omni aro ace, or a combination of them. They’re labels would change every few months....I felt left out, so I started calling myself bi and aro and ace, and it flip flopped. I ONLY did that to fit in, I felt like they’re was something wrong with me.
Everyone tried to tell me that I have “_____ energy” and no one believed I was straight, they’d quiz me on my attraction, and then GIVE ME labels, so I just went along with it, because I thought that’s how it worked....now I’m just a straight girl, nothing special.
But I wanted to be special, I wanted to fit in, I didn’t wanna be “just straight” and that was exacerbated by people making fun of straight people, saying they deserve this and that. I remember having a conversation with my friend on why the straight flag is gray, and she just said “because straight people are boring”...then instantly, I no longer wanted to be who I was, I didn’t wanna be straight. So I gave myself all of these different labels to fit in, and not be boring.
I'm really sorry that was your experience, because for many LGBT+ peeps it's the same story in reverse. We went along with the straight peeps just to fit in, despite knowing there was something "wrong" with us. Only now the pendulum swing fully the opposite way, and everyone feels pressured to be LGBT+ despite not being LGBT+ just to fit in. It's not what I want, personally- I honestly still want to be straight so I can feel the sexual attraction/connection that all allosexuals say I'm missing out on (I'm ace). But I think the majority wants to be special. Ig all we can do is wait until the "fad" dies out
Before culture socially constructed the idea of LGBT, it wasn't even a thought or concern outside people with extreme biological circumstances or eccentric environmentally guided fantasies. I'm all about people having a choice to be or say what they want about themselves. But really think about the context of this. It's only possible because we live in a comfortable entitled society filled with nothing but insecurity and mental health issues because nobody seems to care or understand how to develop healthy meaningful friendships or relationships.
Mark my words. Soon cousin phucking will make a comeback. 😂 The ground work has been laid. You don't have to come out, you keep it in the family.
I agree with you. People tell me I'm "demisexual" but I disagree. Wanting an emotional connection with someone isn't a different sexuality lol. I do get attracted to people even if I don't have feelings for them, but I choose to not sleep with them.
right like isn't demisexual basically how most people approach sex and relationships? 😂
Honestly, I think people these days just want to be unique or special, but also a member of a group. They could latch onto anything or any identity in that quest.
thank you for this patience! this needs to be said. like yes, sexuality is a spectrum but there's still a homosexual and a heterosexual at either side of the spectrum. straight people exist, gay people exist. i'm a lesbian and i would not like to be told "everyone is a bit attracted to every sex and every gender identity!" like i am not attracted to any cis men or trans men or amab nonbinary people and it just would feel very derogatory to be told that, and i'm sure it feels the same for all of you straight people being told you're gay ❤
This reminds me of astrology, in that anyone that reads it, can swear it describes them, when in reality it was created to be broad