Thank you, I only had my asexual realization after taking SSRIs and ADHD meds. After talking it through with my therapist I figured out that what the medication did was allow me to drop the walls/masks/facades that I used to block my sexual attraction that resulted from my being raised Christian and forcing myself to conform to the black and white false dichotomy that was taught to me growing up.
I never had SSIRs and i'm AroAce, i always have been 😅. I just have never been atracted to people the same way otehrs to. Medication has NOTHING to do with it. It's a shame people think this 😑. On a more positive note, i pre-orderd the paperback version of youre book 😄.
I've never taking anything for mental conditions while my sibling is on a couple. I'm ace and they are allo and IDK if it's done anything to their sex drive but even if it did they've complained about not wanting as much sex as they should (IDK how that works either but the rest of my allo family understood it). Meanwhile I demanded to be paid to even try to date since I don't think it's a good use of my time.
I’m in my late thirties. When I was in high school I was super ace and not on SSRIs. I think in my twenties I “became” Demi but was not aware of the language or term or that I was still in the ace spectrum. I think in my early thirties I started taking an SSRI and yeah it had no change in that department. I had to stop taking them because of an unrelated side effect though.
I first realized I was Aro/Ace, before I knew there was a name for my feelings, when I was 13 but didn't start taking Paxil until I was 20, and I'll probably be on it for life, which I really don't mind. I know a lot of people who take antidepressants and as far as I know, most of them are allo, so there's definitely no correlation between Aro/Ace and mental health meds. Sure it may diminish libido at first for some, but of course libido and sexual orientation are two entirely different concepts.
Correct. It happens a lot towards aces, but also aros as well. I'm aromantic, not asexual, but I am also autistic - I am open about both - and have had people tell me that the only reason why I can't experience romantic love, or even understand it, is because of me neurodivergent - specifically because of me being autistic. It's like a Forrest Gump situation where Jenny told Forrest that he can't possibly understand what it's like being in love, or what love is in general, because of his autism. It's really fucked up. Don't get me wrong, there are aromantics whose identity conflates with their neurodivergencey, but as far as I'm personally aware anyone whose aromanticism does conflate with being neurodivergent has never said they were aro *because* of it. Of course, anyone who is nebularomantic and any similar identity, identifies as such for a variety of different reasons, and me saying "no one says they're aro because of them being neurodivergent" may be the wrong portrayal for someone out there that does experience aromanticism in that way. But, it still stands how fucked up it is when people say that about a-spec people and neurodivergent people, and especially towards those who are both.
@@anothercarttogo1819 Seems like a very debilitating (of others) attitude that love must be something an autistic person can't understand, especially as people seem to have no problem with accepting that an autistic person loves their family, loves their God and loves their country (and often I found the assumption would be that someone who is autistic is also a traditionalist). Sad how people who are so keen for everyone to settle down, marry and have kids then tell people with disabilities not to do so.
@@ohthewhomanity Thanks, that makes sense, some others I found were being part Irish made some people think it was normal that I'd be uninterested (since I "lacked the competitiveness of the English"). Although there was the paradox of also being in a state where the most common career advice was to be a soldier.
@@edspace. Yeah, when it comes to this sort of mixture of both amatonormative and ablest thinking (of saying everyone should settle down but not people with disabilities), it honestly kind of comes off as a part of the eugenics ideology/belief of "undesirables" not being worthy of love or relationships, or thinking that "undesirables" shouldn't be allowed to settle down and have their own families.
Thank you, I only had my asexual realization after taking SSRIs and ADHD meds. After talking it through with my therapist I figured out that what the medication did was allow me to drop the walls/masks/facades that I used to block my sexual attraction that resulted from my being raised Christian and forcing myself to conform to the black and white false dichotomy that was taught to me growing up.
Writing down notes from the professor
I never had SSIRs and i'm AroAce, i always have been 😅. I just have never been atracted to people the same way otehrs to. Medication has NOTHING to do with it. It's a shame people think this 😑. On a more positive note, i pre-orderd the paperback version of youre book 😄.
I've never taking anything for mental conditions while my sibling is on a couple. I'm ace and they are allo and IDK if it's done anything to their sex drive but even if it did they've complained about not wanting as much sex as they should (IDK how that works either but the rest of my allo family understood it). Meanwhile I demanded to be paid to even try to date since I don't think it's a good use of my time.
I’m in my late thirties. When I was in high school I was super ace and not on SSRIs. I think in my twenties I “became” Demi but was not aware of the language or term or that I was still in the ace spectrum. I think in my early thirties I started taking an SSRI and yeah it had no change in that department. I had to stop taking them because of an unrelated side effect though.
I first realized I was Aro/Ace, before I knew there was a name for my feelings, when I was 13 but didn't start taking Paxil until I was 20, and I'll probably be on it for life, which I really don't mind. I know a lot of people who take antidepressants and as far as I know, most of them are allo, so there's definitely no correlation between Aro/Ace and mental health meds. Sure it may diminish libido at first for some, but of course libido and sexual orientation are two entirely different concepts.
Is this in the same vain as "its a side effect of autism" claim?
Yep. People often conflate asexuality with other differences that they also view as lesser or infantilizing.
Correct. It happens a lot towards aces, but also aros as well. I'm aromantic, not asexual, but I am also autistic - I am open about both - and have had people tell me that the only reason why I can't experience romantic love, or even understand it, is because of me neurodivergent - specifically because of me being autistic. It's like a Forrest Gump situation where Jenny told Forrest that he can't possibly understand what it's like being in love, or what love is in general, because of his autism. It's really fucked up. Don't get me wrong, there are aromantics whose identity conflates with their neurodivergencey, but as far as I'm personally aware anyone whose aromanticism does conflate with being neurodivergent has never said they were aro *because* of it. Of course, anyone who is nebularomantic and any similar identity, identifies as such for a variety of different reasons, and me saying "no one says they're aro because of them being neurodivergent" may be the wrong portrayal for someone out there that does experience aromanticism in that way. But, it still stands how fucked up it is when people say that about a-spec people and neurodivergent people, and especially towards those who are both.
@@anothercarttogo1819 Seems like a very debilitating (of others) attitude that love must be something an autistic person can't understand, especially as people seem to have no problem with accepting that an autistic person loves their family, loves their God and loves their country (and often I found the assumption would be that someone who is autistic is also a traditionalist). Sad how people who are so keen for everyone to settle down, marry and have kids then tell people with disabilities not to do so.
@@ohthewhomanity Thanks, that makes sense, some others I found were being part Irish made some people think it was normal that I'd be uninterested (since I "lacked the competitiveness of the English"). Although there was the paradox of also being in a state where the most common career advice was to be a soldier.
@@edspace. Yeah, when it comes to this sort of mixture of both amatonormative and ablest thinking (of saying everyone should settle down but not people with disabilities), it honestly kind of comes off as a part of the eugenics ideology/belief of "undesirables" not being worthy of love or relationships, or thinking that "undesirables" shouldn't be allowed to settle down and have their own families.