Hey, new sub here. I appreciate what you guys do here, it’s comforting. I want to start by saying, I’m 23 and I feel I’ve had similar experiences to the person with the dilemma, in terms of feeling like the common denominator. At the time when I was going through everything, it resulted to a lot of avoiding people or isolating myself, it was really hard to see the clear picture of what was really going on, because I chose to remain in that victim mindset, It took some time and it dawned on me that I had some things I needed to work on. Part of What I had to learn was that people are different from me with different experiences and I wasn’t giving people grace the way I gave myself, I wanted to people to be “perfect” in my own egoistic way, basically I wanted to control their behaviours and I resulted in looking out for or rather what I perceived was right or wrong behaviours (subconsciously) and nitpicking. It took a toll on my friendships and almost cost me my romantic relationship. I lost everyone literally, but I’m glad it happened because it made me grow and not take people in my life for granted and let them be humans too just like I am. Fast forward to about a year later, I’m applying what I’ve learnt to my current relationships, I made new friends and it feels so fulfilling. Also I want to point out that tbh it was just me that had issues or did something wrong, those people did as well but what I was and will always be able to control is my own behaviour and how I choose to respond to people. I also became closer to people that are more like minded and have the same values as me. I don’t know if this would help but just wanted to share my story❤
Thank you so much for sharing! It sounds like you've been through such a pivotal learning experience which has ultimately led to growth. Love that for you and I'm sure this will help someone else too 😊
Hey, new sub here. I appreciate what you guys do here, it’s comforting. I want to start by saying, I’m 23 and I feel I’ve had similar experiences to the person with the dilemma, in terms of feeling like the common denominator. At the time when I was going through everything, it resulted to a lot of avoiding people or isolating myself, it was really hard to see the clear picture of what was really going on, because I chose to remain in that victim mindset, It took some time and it dawned on me that I had some things I needed to work on. Part of What I had to learn was that people are different from me with different experiences and I wasn’t giving people grace the way I gave myself, I wanted to people to be “perfect” in my own egoistic way, basically I wanted to control their behaviours and I resulted in looking out for or rather what I perceived was right or wrong behaviours (subconsciously) and nitpicking. It took a toll on my friendships and almost cost me my romantic relationship. I lost everyone literally, but I’m glad it happened because it made me grow and not take people in my life for granted and let them be humans too just like I am.
Fast forward to about a year later, I’m applying what I’ve learnt to my current relationships, I made new friends and it feels so fulfilling. Also I want to point out that tbh it was just me that had issues or did something wrong, those people did as well but what I was and will always be able to control is my own behaviour and how I choose to respond to people. I also became closer to people that are more like minded and have the same values as me.
I don’t know if this would help but just wanted to share my story❤
Thank you so much for sharing! It sounds like you've been through such a pivotal learning experience which has ultimately led to growth. Love that for you and I'm sure this will help someone else too 😊