Have you ever considered how rude it is to come to a foreign country and tell the natives where the can and can't smoke according to you? If you don't like to sit next to people smoking don't go to outdoor ventures. I have never experienced tourists in the USA trying to discuss smoking restrictions. They might dislike it, they might mock and ridicule, but they'll fall suit. Whereas I was approached multiple times by American tourists when smoking outdoors at German cafés and bars. I usually just tell them that it's none of their business to interfere with my constitutional rights to freedom of self-determination and self-fulfillment. If you must be entitled, please be it elsewhere at own discretion!
Yes. I was married to an American for many years. There were so many times that his reactions on something I did, we saw or heard were surprising, confusing or even - quite shocking. There were many arguements, because I speak English quite fluently and I'd say something in English which was perfectly correct, but had a slightly different meaning to an American than to a German "in between the lines", if you know what I mean. He'd be offended, because he thought my English was that good - I'd know what I said to him. And I was baffled, because I did not know what I had done wrong, because what I said was perfectly fine to a German 🤷🏻♀️ Unfortunately, I can't remember too many examples of such misunderstandings, because we separated 20 years ago. But, I remember one episode very well: This cultural difference became very obvious when we went on holiday once and there was a store offering earrings with turquoise stones which I fancied. We asked for the price and I said "Oh, that much? Sorry, we will not be able to afford these." He was FURIOUS. German directness and honesty vs. American male ego. He said I made him look like he could not provide for me. And I did not see what I could have possibly done wrong... (By the way, the earrings were 250.00 DM. Not €, and yes - I am that old...😂) However, these differences played only a smaller part in the failure of our marriage. My significant other now is German and communication is much easier without the cultural difference... 😊 I once read of a study that found that the closer the places that two people grew up at, the higher the probability that a relationship will last. I'd agree according to my experiences.
I'm German, and I hate it when I go into a store and a sales clerk comes up to me and asks what I'm looking for or if he can help me. I want to look around in peace and make my own decisions. If I can't find what I'm looking for, I can ask the staff. But under no circumstances do I want to be chatted up. I think that's pretty German! 😂😂😂
I don’t mind them asking once. I think it is nice, but I usually say I am just looking around. But I don’t like if they start to tell me how great something is, because I usually distrust them being honest about that. In the end, they want to sell me something.
@@Narda185in general I agree, but my experience is that a good sales person will tell you the truth in a polite manner. A satisfied customer might become a regular customer, which is always better for the store.
No you are just antisocial. Es war schon seit den 60ern völlig normal und überall gang und gebe, vorallen in Kaufhäusern und Modeläden, von Fachverkäufern gezielt angesprochen zu werden. Das hat sich eher wieder gelegt weil die Leute immer asozialer seit den 2000ern geworden sind
@@GIwillo Imagine you want to start drawing or painting. You draw something, then you show it to some people to find out what they think about it. The American will say: ”Wow, amazing. I love it". You know you did not do that well, and you ask: "thank you, but what do you think about those trees. I might have drawn them better if I did this and this." American: "No, no. It's absolutely fantastic. Great job." Ask a German, and he will first think: "Hmm. This isn't too good. How can I best tell him. He deserves an honest opinion, so he can do better next time." And the the German might say: "Well, it's already quite good. But maybe you could work on those trees. But keep practicing. Es ist noch kein Meister vom Himmel gefallen". Now, germans would consider the German way as more polite, because of it's honesty. Americans probably their way. But the more useful way is the German way.
@@GIwillo I think that there is a little misunderstanding here. I am (only) talking about situations in which you are asked a question. The asker wants to hear your honest opinion. Why else would they ask, right? If nobody asks you for your opinion and you start badmouthing things out of the blue, that's perceived as impolite in every country.
@@frankmunster1566 I think an important takeaway is that while honesty is important for German politeness, being brutally honest is not polite by German standards either. Sugarcoating is often still necessary.
As someone from the nordics I can say for certain that I think Americans are incredibly rude. They will speak to you, smile and be super polite, give you their contact details and invite you for dinner and so on, all sorts of stuff. But they don't mean any of it, they expect to never hear from you again and every offer or request for input on tourism(even when they are traveling where you grew up) are never wanted, just asked for. And while it might not be "rude" in the interaction it is so incredibly unpleasant and there is so little about interactions with americans that feel genuine. But when you meet a german, or even someone from the nordics they will be polite. If they ask for help, or give you an invite they generally mean it. As a result it is harder to become close, and many people who move here believe we are rude, because we aren't superficial. I'd much rather have people who have genuine interactions than to be somewhere and have to know that I might never have had a single genuine interaction my entire life.
I wonder if Americans ever get in trouble because they say so many things they don't really mean. I remember some years ago, one Finnish woman (who really isn't very smart anyway) had chatted with some American couple in Facebook and considered them her new best friends. They'd told her that if she ever comes to Los Angeles, she really must stay with them.Then she was posting about how she's going to LA and is going to stay with these people. She didn't really go because she didn't have the money for it, but I wonder how those Americans would have reacted if she'd turned up knocking on their door one day. Because here people really mean it if they invite someone to stay at their house. People with good manners would still agree about the details beforehand, but I suspect that this particular woman might have just turned up, just like that. They'd also said something like "you can stay as long as you like", and because of that they probably would have needed a crane to get her out.
@@nellitheretrogamer8666to be fair, as a German, when I invite you to my home of course I mean that. But I would turn you down, if you came without telling beforehand. Maybe for a coffee or something, but on the other hand I wouldn't want guests in a "messy" apartment. There may be an exception if you are a *good* friend and came in need, that's something different. But showing up on vacation prepared to stay XY days without asking first? I would consider this *extremely* rude.
oh yes. i met people from all types of (western) cultures and so far americans are the least trustworthy bunch because of that behaviour. it's so infuriating when you cannot rely on anything they say or express via body language. i'm just superficial too and don't care anymore.
There's a reason why Walmart couldn't never settle stores in Germany. 1. The greetings right when you enter the store makes you feel you get stalked... 2. The random 'Can I help you find anything?' when you just want to look around yourself. And the biggest issue.. 3. Someone wanted to pack your groceries for you. We HATE it when someone is touching our groceries. In the moment when it's in my cart I don't want people, aside from cashier, to touch it. I want to pack it myself. I don't want help with this. If someone would want to do this for me, i would feel offended that I'm too stupid for this. Aka the company things I'm dumb.
I am not german, but I had a similar experience with american friends who moved to europe. I invited them to a party. They said yes, but did not come. When I asked what happend, they were surprised. They said they said yes, without actually knowing if they were able to come, because that is how you do it in the US. I just expect my guests to tell me if they come or not, so that I can plan for the evening. I am not mad if you can't come or want to do something different.
I definitely know this annoying behavior. I would say it is still rude to not later say you weren’t coming when you realize you really aren’t coming also in the U.S., but I definitely am tired of this American social norm as well 😅
Stop using the vocabulars mean and rude in combination with germany. Our country is slandered more than 100,years by britain ( Saturday Review 1896 Germania esse delendam ..Germany must be destroyed,,) and your famous creel Commision 1917 ..germans are blooddrinking Huns..Music of Beethoven Was forbidden. And so on..Reasons... ECC. success and cultural envy? It works still today as we See.. US lyrics of a Pop Song.. Hide your feeling,dont cry it out loud......yes that is the offical education in you countries.. Be always polite and smile.. dont hurt and complain so directly...germans dont roll their eyes so often.
9 місяців тому
@@PassportTwo I'm curious: do Americans honor at least an RSVP?
Yup… that’s also been my issue. The same goes for the offer of “getting together again”…. and when I later ask for details… people would often just give me a vague “sometimes in a couple of weeks” or “we’ll arrange things later”. So I’ve learned not to take those “offers” seriously, if I’ve made one inquiry and I still get vague answers.
There is a very important flip side to the customer service point that you didn't mention at all. You limited yourself to the customer perspective but the service staff perspective matters more. The German approach means retail workers can more easily assert boundaries and have more defense against abusive customers. American retail workers who have to bend over backwards often have to endure soul-wrecking mistreatment since the customer is always right. I do think there is a causal connection between the American lack of labor protection rights on the one hand and its service culture on the other hand.
Yes. This is always what comes to my mind whenever I hear the sentence "the customer is always right". This mentality might seem okay for the customer, but it necessarily leads to a mentality where people feel like they can treat the staff badly without any consequences. And when I hear about the conditions of the service staff in the US compared to the service staff in germany, I honestly prefer better working conditions in the service industry compared to always friendly (but hugely underpaid) service staff. Even though service staff in germany is vastly underpaid, the working conditions are even worse in the US..
And I would also add that the advertisement driven way of selling is more common in eco-liberal states like the US. In Europe maybe some traders think: my goods are good, i don´t need to persuade people for that. Sometimes it takes away the traders pride, when he/she has to smile to offer the products.
Customers are treated as adults who should be capable of reasonable boundaries, rather that toddlers who throw a tantrum when confronted with boundaries.
In my opinion it is rude to light up a cigarette right next to nosmokers but my experience is that it really depends on the people around you. There are a lot of people smoking next to nosmokers without even thinking about it but there are also people who intentionally go away from the group to smoke not to disturb anyone (im a german btw)
I can only agree. Non smoking Germans do consider it rude as well, if someone lights a cigarette right beside them. We have smoking areas as well (for example at train stations), but there are a lot of smokers ignoring those...
If someone lights a cigarette on another table in an outside area, why should it bother me? Sure, I might not like the smell, but the health risk is minimal and probably less than having a barbecue or a neighbor using their fireplace, or even city air in general in many places.
@@Yuki9933I'm totally with you! Therefore I say to them, that they should respect that there are nonsmokes around and ask them to go somewhere else. In general people are doing that. But on a side note, here in Germany, smoking in Restaurants is only allowed at the outside. But still, a nice evening in the summer or spring, with nice food, can get easily destroyed by a guy lighting up a cigarette.
i'm german and i smoke but when i'm with non smokers i will step aside to smoke because i don't like to bother them. when i'm in a restaurants outside area and uave the urge i look around to see if anyone is eating or if there are kids and if so i won't smoke or go somewhere else to smoke. i feel uncomfortable if i smoke around non smokers and i would never dare to smoke around kids. and i don't like smokers that are ignorant or rude towards others just to have a smoke...
As a German i actually hate it, when i go shopping and store staff tries to offer unsolicited "help". At the end of the day, they need to sell me stuff and it makes me feel like a walking wallet, you try to open. I actually consider that to be rude. I am a person and i want to browse and think in peace. Have some respect for my privacy. I personally find it much more considerate and polite if store staff is "holding back" until i initiate contact. I actually avoid stores where in the past staff had been a little too intrusive for my taste.
Here´s an example of german behaviour: At a german university, I was at a student assembly. A jam-packed hall. 1200 people. A guy at the podium was giving an absolutely passionate speech about how we should stage a protest about some injustice. He was giving his heart and everything. *"WHO IS WITH ME!!!"* The entire hall was perfectly silent. In shock and disappointment, the speaker retreated and the flustered moderator decided to start the vote, just to end this embarassment. "Okay, who is in favor of staging a protest? Please raise your hand." And just like that and still in perfect silence... 1200 hands went up in exactly the same moment.
You are obviously NOT from Germany. Or as a German you've got an atrocious sense of humor. That's not even a tasteless joke. Cause jokes aught to be funny. That wasn't!@@lsq7833
Even somewhat grumpy behaviour is better. Yes, they aren't friendly, but most importantly they're honest and upright. You know what to expect and aren't basically being lied to with fake friendliness. I think that's the essential German attitude. Overt fake friendliness is just that: fake. It's a lie, and that's rude. 😂
I live in a very small town in Franken and everybody greets the people he meets in the streets, offen with a smile. Lately I visited my hometown in Sachsen-Anhalt and greeted someone by accident, because I got used to it. He was so irritated, probably trying to remember how he knew me. It was funny and akward at the same time.
The german directness may be considered rude by foreigners. But it's the opposite. We are direct out of respect. Yes means yes and no means no. But we are not angry if somebody says no to something because we assume, that he/she has a reason for saying no to something.
I am German, and I feel slightly embarrassed every time I go into a store and being asked by the store clerk if I needed help with anything. (Yes, that also happens in Germany, but usually in smaller fashion boutiques, fancy cosmetics shops etc.). I wanna get a lay of the land myself first before I bother somebody with a request. I have my usual "Ich schau mich nur um" ("Just taking a look around") phrase for these sorts of situations.
Similiar for me. If I go shopping, I go take a look around. Different areas have signs to show you where to look for things. Then I also want to make my own decision and compare, at my own leisure. If I do not find something or want advice, then I expect personell to be available in the shop to help me out / give opinion and advice / try to sell me something.
My experiance, as a german, Is that thats the store clerks way of telling you "I currently have little to do, so since its part of my job to help customers find the product they search anyways I might be able to help you right away."
@@kerkonig5102I once worked in a store that required its employees to ask every customer upon entry how to help them. We could have been fired for refusing to comply with store policy if we got caught not doing that, so we tried to be as low-key about it as possible, because it made most customers uncomfortable. I myself feel under pressure when chatted up like that, like I am annoying the staff and they are looking for a way to get rid of me as quickly as possible. So yeah, I get it.
Well you can't say the service is bad,it's just different. I explain why... In America Restaurants is more of a in-eat-out Culture,in Germany a Restaurant dinner can go serveral hours. Wich means if you pack a waiter in there who comes every 10 mins or so to ask if you need something it would go into anoying after some time. So it's usual in Germany if you need something besides if you finished eating or your drinks are empty,you give a sign/ wave to the next waiter to come to your Table.
I recently had a conversation with a Russian who has been in Austria for 20 years. In Russia, people think that only crazy people laugh and grin all the time. There is an idiom in German. "Other countries, other manners." This fact must be accepted out of respect.
9 місяців тому+7
Americans lack in that respect department (exceptions exist).
There are also plenty of studies that show how less gifted people laugh more to distract from their intellectual shortcomings. Admittedly I laugh more when in the US, mostly to cover up pitying their naïvety.
Here in Finland, salespeople don't usually bother customers because it is a well-known fact that people hate it. In some stores, they come to ask if you need any help, and when you utter the magical words "I'm just looking", they leave you alone. On the other hand, I've been to the U.S. a couple of times and sometimes I've felt that the salespeople there were not as professional as I'm used to. When I was a teenager, I was there with my mother and we went to some clothing store. My mother wanted to know if they had some skirt in my size. The salesperson asked what size it should be. My mother pointed at me and said that "her size". The salesperson just said flippantly that "I don't know what her size is". My mother was angry about it afterwards, because she was used to that people who work in clothing stores are able to tell a customer's size just by looking at them. I had similar experiences later too, that people in customer service jobs didn't know something that I expected them to know.
I personally hate to be bothered to often by store personal. I want to do my tasks on my own. Maby I'm typically German but the constant over friendliness is definitely not my thing. Just be frank and say what you want on the point in a friendly way. Don't beat around the bush! And there is a difference between being honest/ on point and rudeness. P.s. I just have a problem with smokers while I'm eating otherwise it's fine for me :3
I'd find service staff that smiled at me and followed me, trying to help me way more rude. Stop smiling. What are you hiding? Leave me alone, I know my way around. If I need something, I'll ask
The "smoking" point is a bit of a red rag to me... and it ties in very well with the "Besserwisser". Back in my youth, smoking was a lot more prevalent than it is today... and a lot of it came from "American culture". "The taste of freedom and adventure". The Marlboro Man. Cowboys riding into the sunset, a cigarette on their lips. Copshows, Western, talkshows. Smoking was something that was connected with "freedom" and "independence". Then, slowly, public opinion changed, and in the USA several large lawsuits started this "public" campaign against smoking. A lot of the younger Americans haven't seen it in any other way... and in truly American fashion, they can't see it as being in any other way. And so they now try to "sell" their anti-smoking stance just as previously they tried to sell the world their cigarettes. Besserwisser. It's not just a German habit. Finally question: neither.
I disagree. Smoking is proven to be extremely dangerous to yourself and even more so, the people around you. This is not a simple campaign to profit a big company, but actually about saving lifes. I consider it very rude if people smoke nearby regardless of what they smoke. Especially near children or pregnant people. Your attitude is stemming from the fact, that you don’t want to feel “bevormundet”. Fine for you, but the people around may not be able to avoid your smoke which causes them harm, so you take away their agency and autonomy by that. My freedom ends where I am hurting another person.
@@Narda185Oh, don't get me wrong... I am a non-smoker. Some might even call me a "militant non-smoker". I'd love to see our governement do more to stop smoking, and for just about the same reasons that you brought here. It's dangerous, it's annoying, it's harmful not only to yourself, but also to the people around you. And it's not even that I am against sharing international agendas... there are things that transcend cultural borders and need to be shared, based on our shared humanity. The thing that annoys me is the ignorance of this fundamentals. It's people who promote something, not because it is objectively "better", but just because it is _their_ way... which means it _must_ be better. As an unrelated example of this phenomenon: In a video about a police interaction in the USA, where a driver was stopped, harrassed and detained, because he had flipped off a cop who couldn't handle that, I pointed out that in Germany, insult was a criminal offense, and such a situation would play out very differently (if at all). I made it clear, explicitly, that this was not meant as a comparison between the U.S. version of "free speech" and Germany civil laws limited that in these regards. I made it clear that this was about the behaviour of the police officer who acted out against something that was legal in the USA. I got several responses to this comment... and every single one of them more or less tried to proclaim the objective superiority of U.S. "freedom" vs. the German oppressive system. People just were not able to imagine a system different from their own working... even when the topic was their system NOT working. That's the point here. No offense meant.
I've had been working as a shop clerk in a boutique in germany a few years ago. It was one of the rare shop chains that require they're clerks to always greet customers and ask if they want assistance or just want to browse. 95% of the time people would decline the assistance. I personally also prefer not getting asked these kind of questions by the clerks, to me that often feels like the clerks want to make a sale right as I enter the shop, while I just want to browse first. XDc
German here. I strongly dislike being talked to by employees in a store. "Can I help you with anything?"-"No, thanks. I'm just browsing". This inocuous exchange leaves me feeling ever so slightly worse than before because (subjectively, of course) they disturbed my peace of mind by talking to me and forcing me to interact and then I had to justify my presence in their store and basically apologize for being there without any specific purpose in mind. But I think the main difference when it comes to service in general is that American style service might seem submissive to Germans. The customer is king and you bend over backwards (or at least pretend to). That would make me feel uncomfortable. A waiter or sales clerk is an equal and should not humiilate themself or appear too eager in front of me. That's awkward. It's the waiters job to take my order and get the food to my table. If they do that with a neutral expression I assume they are professionals with confidence and a secure job. If they do that with an eager smile I immediately think they are just out for a big tip (and excessive tipping can also be problematic) - probably because their salary sucks.
i grew up in a small (german) village where you're supposed to greet people in the streets. when i moved to the city i noticed that people would be quite puzzled when i greeted them (by nodding and smiling). so now i do it for fun because i like their reactions and most people will happily greet back after overcoming their bewildermemt 😂
It is a noticeable difference on the country-side. Mainly because less people means less amount of different faces means you are more recognbisable and more interconnected between inhabitants. In a big city you're just a face in the masses... and it would take quite a while to greet everyone you encounter in the inner-city.
yes, exactly what janstratenrauch said: i also grew up on the german countryside. When you see people on the street there, you nod as a greeting, but that is probably, cause you now 3/4 of the little village you grew up in, or they maybe parents of a classmate, or something like that. I always saw it like this: you probably have met those people already and so it's nice to aknowledge those people. Now i live in a big city and if I'm in the middle of the shopping street parts, i mostly only encounter unknown people, who just wanna get through with everything as fast as possilbe like me, so there's no greeting. But the part of the city where my flat is, some people do the nodding as a greeting, either, because we really know each other. Or maybe just because we see each othe on the regular, and both know: oh, it's someone from the directer nighbourhood. But that does need some time, so I was already living here 2 or 3 years, before the first people on the street recognized me and nod-greeted me. so again, it comes down to knowing the people, at least to the degree that you know, it's someone from your street, or the next one. :)
I also grew up in a small town where my parents were well known, so HAD to greet everybody on the street, because they could know my parents and might know me - I hated this! Now living in bigger towns i greet people because i know them or i just want to. A friendly smile always comes back, even from strangers
My family is from Frankfurt, Germany but moved to the US before I was born. When I was younger I noticed a bunch of odd rules at our house compared to my friends. One rule that stood out was we couldn't vacuum on Sundays because it may disturb others. I later found out that Sunday is a Quiet Day called "Ruhetag" meaning day of rest and my family made this a tradition they still followed when they came to the States.
German here. While I live in Berlin, where these sorts of rules are not enforced/expected as strictly as elsewhere in Germany, I still feel bad every time I vaccum on Sunday or (God forbid) throw away glass into the glass recycling bin on Sunday (which is quite loud). 😅
The “smiling custom” in the US is also often mistaken for “romantic interest” by American men. (Just read advice columns, where male customers who make that “mistake” …. and the often female service staff or even random female “victims”…. talk about this issue. Having been a victim of “mistaken interest or flirting”… it’s no fun and can sometimes even be quite unpleasant.
Customer service always has two sides. As a customer, you expect the desired products to automatically fall into your cart without having to do anything yourself. Of course, that doesn't happen. As service staff, you don't want to hassle customers and give them the impression that they are being watched or followed. Service staff cannot read minds. If I want good service, I have to express my wishes. And in a way that shows the staff the same respect that I expect from them. So friendly, factual and polite. Then any customer service can be very satisfying for both parties.
What is also a point: In Germany we don´t have so many cameras in stores and many of them are fake. So attention towards customers often also has to do with having an eye of them to prevent them of stealing expensive stuff. Maybe this was more a point in my childhood than today but it is a reason why I hate to much attention of the staff.
I don't think service is better in the US. 4 weeks ago, I was in Washington DC. For the hotel, they charged 170 $ a night, so I did not consider this as a type of cheap hostel. Nevertheless, for the breakfast-coffee, they had only plastic cups. That is bad service, even if served with a smile ;) And the "customer is always right" attidude comes with a cost: the prices. And german customers usually understand that.
I'm from Austria. I think the smoking culture is even bigger here than in germany. And as a non-smoker I hate it. I can't eat or drink outside in a restaurant anywhere because you will get smoked on. You can't sit outside with children because of this... About ten years ago you even could smoke in any bar or restaurant inside. I'm so glad it changed that much at least.
@@DisturbedFox137 I guess it partly comes from the fact that smokers are naturally less bothered by smoke than non-smokers, so they often don't notice how bad it actually is for the non-smokers around them.
Regarding the smlling, i would like to add that we Germans tend to take people seriously when they do not smile, and we often feel being ridiculed when being smiled at.
Native German here: that’s the feeling I got in America. Everyone smiling at me because they had to not because they wanted to. I don’t need that. Give me an honest smile or shut up. 🤪
Weird. In the areas I live in NRW (North-Rhine Westfalia) it would also be considered rude if someone smokes directly into your face. In most bars and clubs it is also forbidden to smoke? I am not sure about Baden-Württemberg? I know some regions in germany have established special rules for allowing smoking in some areas? Maybe in Baden-Württemberg it is still allowed to maybe smoke in bars? But I am not sure. Because at least in NRW and other german regions it is not allowed to smoke in bars. As far as I know. And even if it was allowed, at least for me and my friends, it would be considered pretty rude if you smoke directly into the direction where other people are eating.
he was talking about smoking outdoors! Yes, smoking inside has been banned in Germany for quite a while, which is WHY most smokers prefer to have tables outside, where they can direct the smoke up and NOT bother others so much. I am a smoker myself and whenever I‘ in groups of non-smokers, I get up and walk away when I have a smoke. Yet, it is almost surprising that especially America, that is so gung-ho about individual rights, does take such a firm stand on this particular point. What about an individual‘s freedom?
@@Attirbful Ah. K. I understand. But at least in my area you rarely see people smoking close to people who are eating. And maybe it is a generational thing, but at least everyone I know would react badly if smoke gets blown towards them while they are eating or if they would see someone smoking close to people who are eating. I personally don't think the smoking thing is something which is considered "normal" for germans or typical "german behaviour", which this video implies. Every german I know would also consider it rude if you smoke close to people who are eating. Everyone I know (and my friends are mostly german) would also consider it rude. And reading the comments, many other germans seem to agree that this is a rude thing. So I have to disagree with the statement that this is "acceptable" behaviour in germany. But maybe Baden-Württemberg has a different mentality towards smoking than NRW for example? I personally don't know. All the other aspects mentioned in the video I can 100% agree, even though I personally would say that those are not bad traits. :)
If i need help in a store, i can always ask. But i don't want to be asked if i need help. Then i always got the feeling that that want to sell me more, than i want to buy. That is the reason why i don't go to shops, where they alwas ask me if i need help. For some things I always go to a store at the other end of the town instead of a store of the same chain nearby, because they never let me shop quietly by my own.
Wenn man fragt, sagen die wo das ist. "Dritter Gang". Selten bringen die ein dahin. Ich glaube in America bringen die dich sofort dahin. Das schon nice
Good observations. You may compare yet another very different service culture: Japan. If the customer is always right in the US and treated like a king, then the Japanese customer is treated like an EMPEROR. But, both service personel and customers know that this is an arranged theatre of rituals, which both take for granted, so this is nothing personal. And when Japanese travel abroad, they are always baffled how rude things are in seemingly every other country (including the US) than Japan, and they feel very uncomfortable about it. Same thing about smiling. Japanese smile only in very distinct contexts, else they always show a "shiran-kao" (literally a know-nothing-face), void of any (possibly offending) emotions. Which is pretty close to the stiff upper lip of the British ... aren't culture shocks a nice subject to study ... Thanks for the video (BTW I am German). Danke
According to Wikipedia Americans smoke as much as the French. So I don`t get that bragging about the restrained Americans. And don´t get me started on drugs and Cannabis. Here the USA leads the developed world.
I'm not German but Danish (similar culture). This video really opened my eyes for why I always see US Americans as being rude. E.g. who smiles in a classroom? Or any other place without any apparent reason? And if I walk into a shop and someone aproch me, asking of I need any help, even of my answer is yes, I know that I'll never return there. Overall, I've never understood why Americans see Germans as being rude, as I've always seen the Germans as being the most polite people I've encountered, next to the English. Although, I should point out that I've never been to the US
Same here. I come from Spain, but I've lived for 25 years in Germany. They are so polite people. And this withou having to smile the whole time. Always a Danke, Bitte, einen schönen Tag noch,...
Simply put... we (germans, and most neighbouring countries as well) can differentiate quite well between politeness and hypocrisy. Like, in a shop, supermarket etc - they want your money. Fact. Wether you feel happy or not - why care? Customers want goods or service, otherwise wouldn't come, right? They are not coming for employees' facial expression, except maybe in a table dance bar or a brothel. Especially grocery shopping better be quick, it is a necessity, not an experience. So, broadly grinning employees must be fake, right?
As a German, I would like to ask if you are going to address the elephant in the room and depict how we find the political norms of America quite ridiculous and narcissistic. For example calling us socialists while having extreme poverty issues, having so much gun violence while clinging to the right to own guns for the most unqualified people, being so susceptible to the own media biases not only in news but also in war-glorifying action movies, having police brutality issues while not realizing that they have no idea about deescalation rather even the opposite, behaving like exaggerted comedy characters in terms of being patriots and are DEADseriously requiring people to actually believe America is the best country of the world(Kindergarten!), being the breeding pool of the most bizarre extreme outlets of religions, I have ever heard of, calling yourself the greatest democracy while only relying on two parties as if that depicts the whole range of opinions possible. Your whole system is raising people to NOT be a team player. Opposition always behaving like football fans.......and so on and on... But yeah, all that madness was summarized well by Don't Look Up! Good self-reflection there.
Btw as a German I confirm that this wasnt meant to come off rude. I know Americans that are quite embarrased how they come off on world's stage. And you should watch the bit of heute show when they interviewed Americans after Trump won the election. That was super funny, but in the not-purposefully way. :)
Serviceorientiert sein heißt nicht, ständig dümmlich zu grinsen, sondern dass was gewünscht bzw. notwendig ist schnell und korrekt zu erledigen. Ständiges Grinsen nervt. Ich habe vorwiegend gute Erfahrung mit dt. Kundendienst, falls mal nicht gibt es halt Stress. Wenn es den Amis hier nicht gefällt - wenn ich mich richtig erinnere, gibt es gut 190 Länder auf Erden, also ...
Suffering from a lung disease, i suffer terribly from smoke around me. It was horrible when smoking was allowed in restaurants, so the ban of smoking inside restaurants is definitely progress, but it pushed smokers outside. So i cannot eat outside in reastaurants because of the smoke. I am forced to eat inside to be safe from the smoke. I recommend that to you. There are designated smoking areas at train stations and airports. And most public buildings ban smoking inside, pushing smokers outside, so get inside quickly to avoid the smoke. I wish we had stricter laws to protect us. It is very difficult to get them here. That is why i am forced to eat inside always, very sad.
This is so true, so awful, that we must move where we eat to accomodate those who pollute the air for us. I hope you live in America where you have a chance to get away from the smoke.
Interestingly enough, if you move one country to Switzerland people are waaaaaay less direct. Swiss people communicate in the most passive aggressive way possible xD I've actually had multiple conversations about this with German exchange students. For all our similarities, we also have a lot of differences. We're often surprised ourselves, considering we're neighbours. But one example of us not communicating as directly as Germans: let's take the smoking in public example. Here in Switzerland if someone lights up a cigarette in a non-smoking area, the most common way to deal with it, is to stew in your anger and say nothing at all. A lot of train stations are now non-smoking areas or at least heavily restricted. Swiss people also don't really talk to each other on public transport unless they know each other and even then talking too loudly is considered extremely rude. Now again: nobody would tell you this, but you instantly lose points if you do it. Now to get back to the smoking example (also works for talking loudly as the strategies are the same): if i know someone there and am already talking with them, one thing i could do to let the person smoking in the non-smoking area know that their behaviour is unacceptable, is to tell my friend in a slightly raised tone (not so loud that it's considered rude - it would be in any other situation but not here - but loud enough for everyone around to "overhear") that I think it is terrible how some people think non-smoking areas don't apply to them. they should plan better and arrive on time to smoke away from the train station if they really needed the smoke or just do it at home. better yet, smoking is unhealthy they should quit. This is meant to be overheard by the smoker and let them know that they are the a**hole. In this specific scenario, if I do not have a friend with me, i can also scan the people around me. Non-verbal communication will start when i make eye contact with someone. if I look at the smoker and make an annoyed face or role my eyes and they sorta respond in kind, it would be acceptable for me to loudly lament about the people who can't read signs or think the rules don't apply to them. this conversation will usually be held shorter than if I was talking to a friend and I will keep my musings to a minimum. the other person will then loudly agree with me and this opens up the interaction to any other people standing next to us, who are also annoyed at the person smoking, to add their agreement. Now if the person is not smoking but just talking loudly on the phone, people might not say anything and the non-verbal communication is just a way to commiserate with each other and let off a little steam. But yeah, if you're ever in Switzerland and you overhear someone talking about how bad they think people doing something you're specifically doing at that very moment is, then that is not just a random conversation but a message targeted at you to stop what you're doing. If you wanna be sure, try to see if they pointedly glance at you from time to time. Now, it could be that the person they're talking to doesn't share their concern and in that case, the person being annoyed at you loses a bit of leverage but yeah, this is how Swiss people tend to communicate their annoyance: it's passive aggressive as hell. Hope you enjoyed my wall of text xD
Eating and smoking outside often follows the "old rules": when everyone at >YOUR TABLE< has finished eating, then you "can" light a cigarette -> unfortunately the tables are much closer together these days ;) * * Often you sit directly back to back and there isn't even a narrow "service aisle" between the chairs/ tables.
In my experiences the rudest persons are the nonsmoker…and that say a nonsmoker. The nonsmokers made such a terror, that is smoking inside of restaurants, bars and pubs isn’t allowed anymore. Now the smokers have to smoke outside. And what are the nonsmokers doing?…they go to that places and complain about the smoking close to them. If you don’t want to smoke, ok. If you are against smoking, ok. But don’t complain, if you go to places, where is a meeting place of smokers. If you bother due outside smokers, shut up and go inside. And reminding: I am a nonsmoker and I hate these behaviours!!!
Native German here. have been to the US and live since 2011 in Scotland. Born and raised in Frankfurt a.M. as also in a boarding school in Bavaria I couldn't agree more. You did a perfect job and I loved the "We have dinner, do You wanna come" video as it hits the spot so well. Thanks as someone being born and raised in Germany with German parents but having american family that lived also in Frankfurt I grew up with both cultures side by side and everyone struggled a bit. When we visited the US we stayed with my american Uncle and his family. He one evening at dinner asked me a question. If I wanna do the evening prayer. He asked that question in absolute fine German. perfectly pronounced and articulated. My instant reaction, not being able to speak english other than single words and knowing my Uncle only speaks english was to look over to my dad and asking "Was hat er gesagt ?" (What did he say). Whole room starts laughing. I sit there shellshocked by that reaction and my uncle was also in a sense baffeld. WE 2 understand what happend around 3 minutes latter and felt stupid.
So... some additions. - 1. Well... germany or better said middle europe (or even europe as a whole) is historically one of THE places for immigration and constantly mixing cultures... except of course when someones understanding of history doesnt go further than the 17th century and the definition of "multicultural" is in fact "different skincolor". (What it often really feels like when i hear americans talk about history - nothing personal) Over hundreds of years middle europe was a melting pot (or better said a "mosaic") of many different cultures and that diversity of germany is still very much present in all the different language-variations, despite many decades of being a more or less united country. If i had to guess where the weird US "fake" smiling comes from, then it is probably much more the general culture of having an "extroverted" and a little over the top society. Where that comes from is a whole other discussion tho. So... no, germany is a lot but surely not "new" to immigration, but clearly funded upon being a melting pot for immigration too. (And if language-barriers would be the reason for it, it would still not change anything. Everybody that ever heard some old germans speak their mother-tongue know what i mean. (Nen richtigen Bayrer oder Plattdeutschler versteht halt keine Sau xD ) - 2. Its about not getting annoyed. Most people that i know would get really pissed after a while, when some service person would treat them like a child that is unable to find stuff themselves. And if we ask where something is, then they will show you where and thats it. If you want more - ask more. And yeah "customer is king" my a**! If you behave like a piece of sh*t, then you will see similar responses from the personal. And i wouldnt want it differently tbh. Crazy how normal common sense works... - 3. Interesting. Probably different on where you live, but from personal experiences, people keep it similar to point 2 or ask first if someone looks like they need help. And for the "Besserwisser" (some prefer to call them "Klugscheißer"), i usually also think its not a bad thing trying to improve someones skills or knowledge. In general we tend to give others advice on many occasions or are mad about something being badly realized or made (some take it too far tho). But tbh how would things improve otherwise? With a fake smile on our lips? - 4. Crazy how honesty can work wonders, isnt it? xD - 5. Yep, vaping is "cool" in germany. Sad but true. Advertising is too good, directly targeting young people (especially teens and younger) and politicians are too slow + the tobacco lobby is pretty big and influencial. (Which also produce vapes of course)
German here. I can totally see that we come across as rude. And let's be real, many people are rude, too rude even for my taste. Vice versa i find the constant over the top cheeriness and smiling in the US creepy AF.
If you are overtly friendly while selling us something we assume you are trying to screw us over. You don’t have a good product and try to compensate with grovelling.
I really hate going shopping in Amrrican stores. After the initial, "Can I help you?" and my, "No thanks, I'm just browsing" they stay glued to you anyway, just a couple steps away. And you can feel their "I WANT TO SELL YOU SOMETHING" brain waves beaming into your head. If I want your help, I'll ask for it! Until then: GO AWAY. Which is why I can't at all relate to your point on Germans giving unsolicited advice. Whatever you're doing (if you're a stranger), I'm staying out of it! And I've never seen other Germans act differently than me. We might offer some help if someone is visibly struggling. But if the offer is rejected, we back off in a hurry.
My favorite German idiom is “nicht gemeckert ist genug gelobt” (not complaining is enough of praise). It’s from Berlin I think but it could be from my northern Germany as well
The question of Smoking: Well, nonsmokers fought years for smokefree restaurants and make smokers go outside. Ok, fine. I consider myself as a respectful smoker and never had an issue with smoking outside. Actually I prefer it myself by now. BUT: If someone has a problem with me smoking (or rather vaping) outside, he has the right to move inside to his granted smokefree space while I enjoy the sun outside with a beer. Fair enough I guess ;)
6:15 Okay, yes. German customer service literally hangs up on you, when they do not want to talk to you anymore. Legitimately! It's unfathomable. Never experienced anything like it in the UK.
I as a German consider it rude if someone lights his cigarret right next to me in the outdoor area of a restaurant while I‘m still eating. It doesn‘t bother me much when I‘m only drinking something. But I can still remember a time when smoking actually was allowed indoor of the restaurants. Man, that was a bother. So I‘m considering it a huge success that smoking nowerdays is only allowed outside. The other „rude“ behaviours in this video are quite funny from my point of view. Especially the thing with the smiles. Because, really, why should I smile if there is nothing to smile for, just for the sake of it? Nahhh… ;)
... it was quite painful to come home at night after spending some time in a smoky restaurant or club then. Your hair, your clothes, everything, just awful ...
Smile - i hate that fake smiling and laughing. Kind of Respect? Not in Germany, especially in Hessen, but a friendly face is good. Even worse is the learned fake laughter in conversations.
I obviously smile a lot. People told me. I am German and when having had the reversed culture shock returning from the states I realized people here look dull straight onto the floor or into the air, minding their own business or being with their phone. They do open up all of a sudden when being 'activated'. When in school I got bullied a lot because I liked to laugh a lot or I just smile. I felt well in the states.
Heyyy in German Stadiums we habe a so called family block. Where most of the times family's are watching the games in in this particular area, smoking is forbidden. So it could be an opportunity if you don't wanna have people smoke around you 😊
It should be the opposite - a section of the stadium where people are allowed to smoke. And with such an air circulation system that the people around it aren't suffering.
Thanks for always making entertaining,educational and funny videos. ❤Even after what 4? Years in Germany. And yes smokers are amongst the rudest people. They don’t try to understand how disgusting their habit is to non smokers 🤢
i have worked in retail and i've greeted customers with a smile when they were near me because that's how i am. but since i don't like to be bothered when i shop i wouldn't pay any attention to customers until they would come up to me to request help. then i would do my best for them. edit: if you work with customers (be it retail, customer service or whatever) if both sides are polite and respectful there's no need to smile (but it can happen naturally 😉). pro tip: the customer is not always right (!) and the employee is often not the one at fault so to be nice will most likely get you what you want 😁
I remember clearly the year that smoking in bars and restaurants was made illegal in Seattle, following California. What a relief. Then I moved to Germany and it took years before I could breathe clean air in a restaurant. And the loopholes! They were told to offer a room for smoking but instead, they offered a single non-smoking room with the door open the entire time, my life sucked if I wanted to eat out. Now, finally it's better. Except that the employees in my local Aldi AND my local Edeka smoke in the employee break rooms which are located in the stores so there are always parts of the stores that are smoke-filled. And writing letters to the management did nothing. I find it crazy that there is a large No Smoking sign at the entry to my Aldi, while employees smoke by the bread ovens in the back. How long must I wait for clean air in a German grocery store?
If you want something to be done about it, you should look for your local or communal Rathaus (online or in person). Then look for "Veterinäramt". The Veterinär is the hygiene inspector and he will be interested.
I would not agree with 3:10 germany was always a melting pot... and it is not just because of immigrants but because of how it came to be... so many cultures in 1 country from the very start :/ I feel that not understanding one another is definitly not "the" or even one of the reasons why americans smile more. Also... Yes I am german... yes I do get annoyed slightly by smoking when it happenes right next to me... but I also try to understand since smoking is an addiction and in germany the rules about not smoking popped up very quickly and I do not think it is a topic often discussed with you doctor. (getting rid of that addiction I mean) Also the growing smoking numbers might have come from covid to an extend. so yeah... while I do not appreciate the smoke I understand that it might not be easy on smoking people in germany.
Sorry, but do you seriously think Germany is LESS culturally diverse than the US??? The country at the center of Europe with trading routes and great exchange of knowledge with workers from everywhere for centuries if not millenniums is supposed to be LESS diverse than the US, a comparatively recently established colony with a lot of European settlers and their slaves. Come on man...
@@PassportTwo The main difference is, that the USA is not (anymore?) a melting pot, but a salad bowl. As a result, the USA looks more diverse, while in reality it is just more heavily segregated. You do have cultural ghettos in Germany as well, sure. But due to a stronger integrating (for foreigners) and cooperative (for neighboring nations) culture, Germany might seem to be less diverse to the superficial american eye. While in reality it is much more diverse on a different scale, as it's much more open to hybridisation. Fun fact: only 15.3% of americans are immigrants, while this is true for 18.8% of all germans.
The one thing the US has mastered, is the ease of being American and something else at the same time. You can be American and Irish, Italian or Turkish with zero problems, even as a first generation immigrant. Germany struggles with that concept a lot, forcing you to chose one identity, and even then Germany might not accept you as truly German because you look too different.
Note in the video I said that this smiling culture developed from a history of immigration and that Germany is a „relatively“ new immigrant nation that maybe hasn’t had time to develop this as a cultural marker of immigration. So quoting the immigration data and rates of today, doesn’t discredit that. Very interesting data though.
@@PassportTwo Yes, yes, the USA has seen a lot of immigration. But again: it's an assimilating country, not a melting pot. More like the borg really, than like the federation. In the USA you have a rather binary system: either you are an exotic segregated color in the salad, or you are completely assimilated, with a lot of noise about pretended "ancestry" but without much true substance. And I completely disagree with your idea that Germany is a new immigration nation. That's completely nationalist nonsense. Germany has been at the center of trading and migration routes since the stone age. You'll be hard pressed to find many germans, that do not have polish, czech or french ancestry in a way that most americans would abuse to claim "I'm a [insert a nation here that they hardly know how to spell correctly]". But again: Germany IS and always has been a melting pot. The two stone age migration streams met in Hassia, the celtic and germanic tribes mixed in central Germany as well, with gallo-roman and slavic migrations entering later on. Every invading army left its genetic and cultural traces. And even later, oppressed hugenottes, as well as slavic people from Poland, Bohemia and many other countries came during the industrial revolution. It's understandable that you do not know such things, after all, it's not what's taught in the USA. But please, stop pretending you understand german migration history if you base your knowledge on rather one-sided information. It's not your fault to not know this, but it's your fault if you continue spreading it.
As a german, i don't want to be chatted at immediatly by sales clerks. I want to take a look around, get an impression on what the shop has to offer and if i fail to find something or am overwhelmed, then i wanna go ask for help. Anything else feels... kinda creepy and stalkerish. Like "let me at least have a few minutes to set my mind and get some orientation before coming at me like a hound trailing for prey". And i don't need anyone fake-smile at me. You don't know me, i don't know you, so let's approach each other like adults with open minds instead of Barbie-doll-like psychopaths with their staring, smiling faces. We smile but not at anyone and everyone. Also... i don't know for certain but i wouldn't associate "Service-Wüste" with "unfriendly"... at least not in general. Yes, being rude can be part of that but mostly - to me - it is like: often employees won't go the extra mile or take some extra work that benefits the customer (not without paying for it). Service won't make sure the customer is happy, does feel comfortable or will return - in most cases. So the question "can i have this little extra/ can i have this special appointment" is in general answeres with "no" or "that would be 10€ extra". You won't get service just for the sake of customer-happyness.
One reason of the service level might be that in Germany tips are nice but not a fixed (or only) part of the income. And "The Customer is always right" attitude might be one reason for the "Karen" syndrome. :)
When someone next to you lights a cigarette, use the magic of german directness and thell him/her that he might step a meter (3 feet) away so that the smoke doesn't hit you in the face.
And then, many Polish speaking people came to the Ruhr area working as miners in 1870, which you still notice in the names in the area up to today. Point is: They did not immigrate everywhere in the same ways, but neither did this happen in the US.
The smoking in public has significantly declined in Germany. We used to have smoking in ALL RESTAURANTS, even in HOSPITALS. They had to heavily legislate to limit smoking in most places. Stadiums are among the last holdouts where people smoke recklessly like that. Restaurants, train stations, hospitals, most private homes are strictly non-smoking zones. In the 80s they measured how hip a place was by how far you could see on a Saturday night. That's why at the favorite place my parents had, you called a waiter over by tipping the lamp hanging over your booth, because raised arms weren't visible from the bar. And if course the place would be so loud, hollering wasn't an option, either.
I'd rather have an honest working-here-sucks-but-i-will-do-my-job frown than an unconvincing this-is-the-best-day-ever grin when i go shopping. Behave like a human being, not some customer-pleasing automaton.
Great to see Aubrey in the video. Hope the three of you are all fine. Cake or ice cream? Tough one. It depends so much on the type of cake and the flavour of the ice cream.
As a German i can agree with you that a lot of people here are smoking. And I hate it. But unfortunately, the people that smoke without actually caring for their surroundings are also the ones that won't stop when you tell them to. On the other topics: I find it incredibly annoying when people are superficially polite. It just doesn't feel genuine and I'd rather be treated a little more rude and know how people think about me. You don't know if you're in a good relationship or if it's just normal politeness with Americans. Also a lot of times when I meet Americans here (Heidelberg), they act nicely but you can instantly see that they absolutely don't care. A lot of tourists come here and take photos of all the old buildings but then they ask questions that seem so awfully stupid that it is just obvious that they really don't care and are just asking this to be polite and to keep the conversation going. I'd rather not have any conversation at all instead of having to explain to them that the US Capitol building is not older than the Heidelberg castle, even if it looks like old architecture. I can assure you that a lot of germans prefer actually caring about relationships and in turn, being a little more conservative towards other people, than just being polite all the time.
For me the most superficial and false behaviour is when people are smiling while speaking. This is unnatural. Some people are grinning all the time when they speaking. Very strange.
I hate it when people smoke around me, but I also still remember the times when it's been widely allowed indoors. There have been disgusting smoking carriages and people smooked in restaurants, bars and clubs. So coming from there it got a lit better.
As a German I don't like to go into empty shops where I would be the only customer, because the chance would be hoghwr that the staff would speak to me 😅
I’m quite a bit late but I want to say something to the smoking topic: I myself have quiet the problem with nicotine. If I smoke it or sometimes even just breathing it in passively I get really nauseous and sometimes can even end up throwing up. This said, I was at a festival last year waiting for one of my favorite bands to come up on stage. The crowd was packed and the guy right beside me decided it would be a good time to light his cigarette. I proceeded to ask him, if he could at least move a bit away, so that I wouldn’t inhale his smoke. He did that. And only that. I mean, I was thankful for it and didn’t really give it much thought, but looking back at it he really thought crushed in the 30 degree celcius heat between hundreds of people would be the best time to smoke. Our country really has a problem with smoking. Even I smoked for some time from 13 to 16 years old and I know quiet a lot of people that started smoking at the age of 13, 14. But somehow we can’t get away from it….
If you think this is a rude in germany, go to berlin. Real "Berliner" talk to everyone like your their oldest and best friend, they don't talk around something and say you're dumb direct into your face, if you do something stupid. Everyone is their pal. But at the same time they're helpful to everyone like your their oldest and best friend, like "Of curse I moving the couch with you. With your leek arms you can't do it by your own. Looser" Being in berlin is a cultural shock, even for most germans. Unfortunaly the berlin culture is dying out, because the seemingly rudeness was punished by the political correctnes movement in the 90s and early 00s. Non-berliner doesn't understand it right away.
0:38 I'm sorry, can we unpick this? Who answered this survey? Was this global, or was this asked in the US?? If it's the latter, than yeah, does this hold any real value? As a European, I am annoyed by obnoxious, loud and fake-friendly Americans, so I think it's safe to say that our cultures are just really different.
To the smoking debate: I’m German and never had a smoke in my entire life. I have no problem in a beer garden if at the next table they’re smoking. We’re outside, pollution thins out. Because most of us Germans have the attitude “Leben und leben lassen!” which means a certain tolerance to things i would never do but accept them for others. On the other hand it’s perfectly ok for anyone over here to ask a smoker to stop smoking if kids are around - and this will not make me a “Besserwisser”. My American friends usually admit that our tolerance level is higher but they are also astonished how easily a problem can be solved by directly addressing it - without trying to avoid stepping on the other person’s toes. We can and should all learn from each other. Thanks for this show, it also helps me to understand my friends and coworkers from abroad a bit better!
Germans like to walk around and looking thru the shops and be always asked if u want or need anything is very enjoyable for us we like our Peace and relaxing and if we need a service we go to them and asking then the most one do Help good.
I'm german and I really hate it, when people smoke next to me. I am a non-smoker for my whole life and I cann't stand the smoke and the smell of my clothes and hair afterwards. Beside the health risk it brings, when you breathe it in.
Here in southern Germany/western Austria it can happen that someone asks you if they can help you if you enter a store... which i really do not like at all, i want to look around for my own, if i have a question i will ask the staff myself... And yes, as a non-smoker it hate it, that it is still absolutely accepted to smoke everywhere outside with no regards for others...
Wal-Mart actually didn't survive here because they ignored german laws and tried to push the American way, aka almost no workers' rights, onto the employees. The CEO was also arrogant about it so people simply stayed away
If you complain about smoking you should have visited Germany 20 years ago when smoking was still almost everywhere. Compared to back then smoking is almost non existing anymore
I goddamn hate smoking in crowded areas (or in my general vicinity). Especially at restaurants. Don't know, why it's not forbidden already, as we banned it in a lot of places in Germamy.
Cultural norm 2 is not quite right. Many stores employee give you a good service. Yes you have to ask sometimes, because they dont want to assume or overstep your boundaries
Have you ever any cultural misunderstandings like this personally experienced?? 😅
yet another video i only see 2 days later per chance because i get no notifs at all, even with Bell on " all" ...
Have you ever considered how rude it is to come to a foreign country and tell the natives where the can and can't smoke according to you?
If you don't like to sit next to people smoking don't go to outdoor ventures.
I have never experienced tourists in the USA trying to discuss smoking restrictions. They might dislike it, they might mock and ridicule, but they'll fall suit.
Whereas I was approached multiple times by American tourists when smoking outdoors at German cafés and bars. I usually just tell them that it's none of their business to interfere with my constitutional rights to freedom of self-determination and self-fulfillment.
If you must be entitled, please be it elsewhere at own discretion!
Yes. I was married to an American for many years. There were so many times that his reactions on something I did, we saw or heard were surprising, confusing or even - quite shocking.
There were many arguements, because I speak English quite fluently and I'd say something in English which was perfectly correct, but had a slightly different meaning to an American than to a German "in between the lines", if you know what I mean. He'd be offended, because he thought my English was that good - I'd know what I said to him. And I was baffled, because I did not know what I had done wrong, because what I said was perfectly fine to a German 🤷🏻♀️ Unfortunately, I can't remember too many examples of such misunderstandings, because we separated 20 years ago. But, I remember one episode very well: This cultural difference became very obvious when we went on holiday once and there was a store offering earrings with turquoise stones which I fancied. We asked for the price and I said "Oh, that much? Sorry, we will not be able to afford these."
He was FURIOUS. German directness and honesty vs. American male ego. He said I made him look like he could not provide for me. And I did not see what I could have possibly done wrong... (By the way, the earrings were 250.00 DM. Not €, and yes - I am that old...😂)
However, these differences played only a smaller part in the failure of our marriage.
My significant other now is German and communication is much easier without the cultural difference... 😊
I once read of a study that found that the closer the places that two people grew up at, the higher the probability that a relationship will last. I'd agree according to my experiences.
The better question would be -how many have we avoided so far 😂😂😂
I'm German, and I hate it when I go into a store and a sales clerk comes up to me and asks what I'm looking for or if he can help me. I want to look around in peace and make my own decisions. If I can't find what I'm looking for, I can ask the staff. But under no circumstances do I want to be chatted up. I think that's pretty German!
😂😂😂
I don’t mind them asking once. I think it is nice, but I usually say I am just looking around. But I don’t like if they start to tell me how great something is, because I usually distrust them being honest about that. In the end, they want to sell me something.
I hate that as well, thank God it next to never happens to me here in Portugal
@@Narda185in general I agree, but my experience is that a good sales person will tell you the truth in a polite manner. A satisfied customer might become a regular customer, which is always better for the store.
Same! Please don’t talk to me, I usually know my way around. And if I don’t I‘ll ask.
No you are just antisocial.
Es war schon seit den 60ern völlig normal und überall gang und gebe, vorallen in Kaufhäusern und Modeläden, von Fachverkäufern gezielt angesprochen zu werden. Das hat sich eher wieder gelegt weil die Leute immer asozialer seit den 2000ern geworden sind
"Americans are too polite to be honest. Germans are too honest to be polite"
I disagree! In Germany, being honest is the polite and respectful thing to do. Insulting someone's intelligence by lying to him would be impolite.
@@Hoelzchen Also we know how to insult politely.
@@GIwillo Imagine you want to start drawing or painting. You draw something, then you show it to some people to find out what they think about it.
The American will say: ”Wow, amazing. I love it".
You know you did not do that well, and you ask: "thank you, but what do you think about those trees. I might have drawn them better if I did this and this." American: "No, no. It's absolutely fantastic. Great job."
Ask a German, and he will first think: "Hmm. This isn't too good. How can I best tell him. He deserves an honest opinion, so he can do better next time."
And the the German might say: "Well, it's already quite good. But maybe you could work on those trees. But keep practicing. Es ist noch kein Meister vom Himmel gefallen".
Now, germans would consider the German way as more polite, because of it's honesty.
Americans probably their way. But the more useful way is the German way.
@@GIwillo I think that there is a little misunderstanding here. I am (only) talking about situations in which you are asked a question. The asker wants to hear your honest opinion. Why else would they ask, right? If nobody asks you for your opinion and you start badmouthing things out of the blue, that's perceived as impolite in every country.
@@frankmunster1566 I think an important takeaway is that while honesty is important for German politeness, being brutally honest is not polite by German standards either. Sugarcoating is often still necessary.
As someone from the nordics I can say for certain that I think Americans are incredibly rude.
They will speak to you, smile and be super polite, give you their contact details and invite you for dinner and so on, all sorts of stuff. But they don't mean any of it, they expect to never hear from you again and every offer or request for input on tourism(even when they are traveling where you grew up) are never wanted, just asked for. And while it might not be "rude" in the interaction it is so incredibly unpleasant and there is so little about interactions with americans that feel genuine. But when you meet a german, or even someone from the nordics they will be polite. If they ask for help, or give you an invite they generally mean it.
As a result it is harder to become close, and many people who move here believe we are rude, because we aren't superficial. I'd much rather have people who have genuine interactions than to be somewhere and have to know that I might never have had a single genuine interaction my entire life.
I wonder if Americans ever get in trouble because they say so many things they don't really mean. I remember some years ago, one Finnish woman (who really isn't very smart anyway) had chatted with some American couple in Facebook and considered them her new best friends. They'd told her that if she ever comes to Los Angeles, she really must stay with them.Then she was posting about how she's going to LA and is going to stay with these people. She didn't really go because she didn't have the money for it, but I wonder how those Americans would have reacted if she'd turned up knocking on their door one day. Because here people really mean it if they invite someone to stay at their house. People with good manners would still agree about the details beforehand, but I suspect that this particular woman might have just turned up, just like that. They'd also said something like "you can stay as long as you like", and because of that they probably would have needed a crane to get her out.
@@nellitheretrogamer8666to be fair, as a German, when I invite you to my home of course I mean that. But I would turn you down, if you came without telling beforehand. Maybe for a coffee or something, but on the other hand I wouldn't want guests in a "messy" apartment.
There may be an exception if you are a *good* friend and came in need, that's something different. But showing up on vacation prepared to stay XY days without asking first? I would consider this *extremely* rude.
oh yes. i met people from all types of (western) cultures and so far americans are the least trustworthy bunch because of that behaviour. it's so infuriating when you cannot rely on anything they say or express via body language. i'm just superficial too and don't care anymore.
There's a reason why Walmart couldn't never settle stores in Germany.
1. The greetings right when you enter the store makes you feel you get stalked...
2. The random 'Can I help you find anything?' when you just want to look around yourself.
And the biggest issue..
3. Someone wanted to pack your groceries for you. We HATE it when someone is touching our groceries. In the moment when it's in my cart I don't want people, aside from cashier, to touch it. I want to pack it myself. I don't want help with this. If someone would want to do this for me, i would feel offended that I'm too stupid for this. Aka the company things I'm dumb.
you probably are though.
Why would they pack your groceries for you?!
@@sxkb Its a bling-bling fake service. Like, it is an irrelevant act.
I take my own bags with me, why should somebody know, hiw I pack and which bag is for what...
They can’t make it cause they don’t pay good or unionize
I am not german, but I had a similar experience with american friends who moved to europe. I invited them to a party. They said yes, but did not come. When I asked what happend, they were surprised. They said they said yes, without actually knowing if they were able to come, because that is how you do it in the US. I just expect my guests to tell me if they come or not, so that I can plan for the evening. I am not mad if you can't come or want to do something different.
I definitely know this annoying behavior. I would say it is still rude to not later say you weren’t coming when you realize you really aren’t coming also in the U.S., but I definitely am tired of this American social norm as well 😅
O@@PassportTwo
Stop using the vocabulars mean and rude in combination with germany.
Our country is slandered more than 100,years by britain ( Saturday Review 1896 Germania esse delendam ..Germany must be destroyed,,) and your famous creel Commision 1917 ..germans are blooddrinking Huns..Music of Beethoven Was forbidden. And so on..Reasons...
ECC. success and cultural envy?
It works still today as we See..
US lyrics of a Pop Song.. Hide your feeling,dont cry it out loud......yes that is the offical education in you countries..
Be always polite and smile.. dont hurt and complain so directly...germans dont roll their eyes so often.
@@PassportTwo I'm curious: do Americans honor at least an RSVP?
Yup… that’s also been my issue. The same goes for the offer of “getting together again”…. and when I later ask for details… people would often just give me a vague “sometimes in a couple of weeks” or “we’ll arrange things later”. So I’ve learned not to take those “offers” seriously, if I’ve made one inquiry and I still get vague answers.
There is a very important flip side to the customer service point that you didn't mention at all. You limited yourself to the customer perspective but the service staff perspective matters more. The German approach means retail workers can more easily assert boundaries and have more defense against abusive customers. American retail workers who have to bend over backwards often have to endure soul-wrecking mistreatment since the customer is always right. I do think there is a causal connection between the American lack of labor protection rights on the one hand and its service culture on the other hand.
Yes. This is always what comes to my mind whenever I hear the sentence "the customer is always right".
This mentality might seem okay for the customer, but it necessarily leads to a mentality where people feel like they can treat the staff badly without any consequences.
And when I hear about the conditions of the service staff in the US compared to the service staff in germany, I honestly prefer better working conditions in the service industry compared to always friendly (but hugely underpaid) service staff.
Even though service staff in germany is vastly underpaid, the working conditions are even worse in the US..
And I would also add that the advertisement driven way of selling is more common in eco-liberal states like the US. In Europe maybe some traders think: my goods are good, i don´t need to persuade people for that. Sometimes it takes away the traders pride, when he/she has to smile to offer the products.
NotAlwaysRight.
Sure part of it is the American dominance on the Internet... but it is still telling how many of the stories there are from the USA.
@@Groffili Yup, and the American stories seem to have the most entitled customers and the most spineless managers trying to appease these customers.
Customers are treated as adults who should be capable of reasonable boundaries, rather that toddlers who throw a tantrum when confronted with boundaries.
In my opinion it is rude to light up a cigarette right next to nosmokers but my experience is that it really depends on the people around you. There are a lot of people smoking next to nosmokers without even thinking about it but there are also people who intentionally go away from the group to smoke not to disturb anyone (im a german btw)
I can only agree. Non smoking Germans do consider it rude as well, if someone lights a cigarette right beside them. We have smoking areas as well (for example at train stations), but there are a lot of smokers ignoring those...
If someone lights a cigarette on another table in an outside area, why should it bother me? Sure, I might not like the smell, but the health risk is minimal and probably less than having a barbecue or a neighbor using their fireplace, or even city air in general in many places.
i hate that, especially when i'm eating. someone smoking close to me would ruin the whole experience. @@SomePotato
@@Yuki9933I'm totally with you! Therefore I say to them, that they should respect that there are nonsmokes around and ask them to go somewhere else. In general people are doing that. But on a side note, here in Germany, smoking in Restaurants is only allowed at the outside. But still, a nice evening in the summer or spring, with nice food, can get easily destroyed by a guy lighting up a cigarette.
i'm german and i smoke but when i'm with non smokers i will step aside to smoke because i don't like to bother them. when i'm in a restaurants outside area and uave the urge i look around to see if anyone is eating or if there are kids and if so i won't smoke or go somewhere else to smoke. i feel uncomfortable if i smoke around non smokers and i would never dare to smoke around kids. and i don't like smokers that are ignorant or rude towards others just to have a smoke...
As a German i actually hate it, when i go shopping and store staff tries to offer unsolicited "help". At the end of the day, they need to sell me stuff and it makes me feel like a walking wallet, you try to open. I actually consider that to be rude. I am a person and i want to browse and think in peace. Have some respect for my privacy. I personally find it much more considerate and polite if store staff is "holding back" until i initiate contact. I actually avoid stores where in the past staff had been a little too intrusive for my taste.
Here´s an example of german behaviour: At a german university, I was at a student assembly. A jam-packed hall. 1200 people. A guy at the podium was giving an absolutely passionate speech about how we should stage a protest about some injustice. He was giving his heart and everything. *"WHO IS WITH ME!!!"* The entire hall was perfectly silent. In shock and disappointment, the speaker retreated and the flustered moderator decided to start the vote, just to end this embarassment. "Okay, who is in favor of staging a protest? Please raise your hand." And just like that and still in perfect silence... 1200 hands went up in exactly the same moment.
Did they all raise their right hand by any chance?
@@lsq7833are you German? Cause you’re not funny!
@@lsq7833LMAO
You are obviously NOT from Germany. Or as a German you've got an atrocious sense of humor. That's not even a tasteless joke. Cause jokes aught to be funny. That wasn't!@@lsq7833
@@lsq7833 probably, but you need to look at the Angle we do this.....and then run😂
Better an honest, serious face than a hypocritical grin
Even somewhat grumpy behaviour is better. Yes, they aren't friendly, but most importantly they're honest and upright. You know what to expect and aren't basically being lied to with fake friendliness.
I think that's the essential German attitude. Overt fake friendliness is just that: fake. It's a lie, and that's rude. 😂
Yes, here in Austria a smile is not always a friendly smile but a fake one.
What do you prefer:
a) service with a smile, or
b) service with actual expertise?
I live in a very small town in Franken and everybody greets the people he meets in the streets, offen with a smile. Lately I visited my hometown in Sachsen-Anhalt and greeted someone by accident, because I got used to it. He was so irritated, probably trying to remember how he knew me. It was funny and akward at the same time.
The german directness may be considered rude by foreigners. But it's the opposite. We are direct out of respect. Yes means yes and no means no. But we are not angry if somebody says no to something because we assume, that he/she has a reason for saying no to something.
I am German, and I feel slightly embarrassed every time I go into a store and being asked by the store clerk if I needed help with anything. (Yes, that also happens in Germany, but usually in smaller fashion boutiques, fancy cosmetics shops etc.). I wanna get a lay of the land myself first before I bother somebody with a request. I have my usual "Ich schau mich nur um" ("Just taking a look around") phrase for these sorts of situations.
Similiar for me. If I go shopping, I go take a look around. Different areas have signs to show you where to look for things. Then I also want to make my own decision and compare, at my own leisure. If I do not find something or want advice, then I expect personell to be available in the shop to help me out / give opinion and advice / try to sell me something.
My experiance, as a german, Is that thats the store clerks way of telling you "I currently have little to do, so since its part of my job to help customers find the product they search anyways I might be able to help you right away."
Warum seid ihr alle solche Schneeflöckchen?
Einfach sagen danke, alles gut und fertig 😂
@@kerkonig5102I once worked in a store that required its employees to ask every customer upon entry how to help them. We could have been fired for refusing to comply with store policy if we got caught not doing that, so we tried to be as low-key about it as possible, because it made most customers uncomfortable.
I myself feel under pressure when chatted up like that, like I am annoying the staff and they are looking for a way to get rid of me as quickly as possible. So yeah, I get it.
@@RealEvilLordExdeath Sehr erwachsene Antwort
Well you can't say the service is bad,it's just different.
I explain why...
In America Restaurants is more of a in-eat-out Culture,in Germany a Restaurant dinner can go serveral hours.
Wich means if you pack a waiter in there who comes every 10 mins or so to ask if you need something it would go into anoying after some time.
So it's usual in Germany if you need something besides if you finished eating or your drinks are empty,you give a sign/ wave to the next waiter to come to your Table.
"Rude" could be replaced by "honest". We don't smile if we don't feel like smiling. :)
I recently had a conversation with a Russian who has been in Austria for 20 years.
In Russia, people think that only crazy people laugh and grin all the time.
There is an idiom in German. "Other countries, other manners."
This fact must be accepted out of respect.
Americans lack in that respect department (exceptions exist).
@j.b.5422 and if you're unlucky followed by some rude comment about women which only 'redeeming' feature is that it rhymes too....
Austria and germany are a difference like night and day 😂
That proverb also exists in English: when in Rome, do as the Romans do.
There are also plenty of studies that show how less gifted people laugh more to distract from their intellectual shortcomings.
Admittedly I laugh more when in the US, mostly to cover up pitying their naïvety.
Here in Finland, salespeople don't usually bother customers because it is a well-known fact that people hate it. In some stores, they come to ask if you need any help, and when you utter the magical words "I'm just looking", they leave you alone.
On the other hand, I've been to the U.S. a couple of times and sometimes I've felt that the salespeople there were not as professional as I'm used to. When I was a teenager, I was there with my mother and we went to some clothing store. My mother wanted to know if they had some skirt in my size. The salesperson asked what size it should be. My mother pointed at me and said that "her size". The salesperson just said flippantly that "I don't know what her size is". My mother was angry about it afterwards, because she was used to that people who work in clothing stores are able to tell a customer's size just by looking at them. I had similar experiences later too, that people in customer service jobs didn't know something that I expected them to know.
I personally hate to be bothered to often by store personal. I want to do my tasks on my own. Maby I'm typically German but the constant over friendliness is definitely not my thing. Just be frank and say what you want on the point in a friendly way. Don't beat around the bush! And there is a difference between being honest/ on point and rudeness.
P.s. I just have a problem with smokers while I'm eating otherwise it's fine for me :3
I'd find service staff that smiled at me and followed me, trying to help me way more rude. Stop smiling. What are you hiding? Leave me alone, I know my way around. If I need something, I'll ask
The "smoking" point is a bit of a red rag to me... and it ties in very well with the "Besserwisser".
Back in my youth, smoking was a lot more prevalent than it is today... and a lot of it came from "American culture". "The taste of freedom and adventure". The Marlboro Man. Cowboys riding into the sunset, a cigarette on their lips. Copshows, Western, talkshows. Smoking was something that was connected with "freedom" and "independence".
Then, slowly, public opinion changed, and in the USA several large lawsuits started this "public" campaign against smoking. A lot of the younger Americans haven't seen it in any other way... and in truly American fashion, they can't see it as being in any other way.
And so they now try to "sell" their anti-smoking stance just as previously they tried to sell the world their cigarettes.
Besserwisser. It's not just a German habit.
Finally question: neither.
I disagree. Smoking is proven to be extremely dangerous to yourself and even more so, the people around you.
This is not a simple campaign to profit a big company, but actually about saving lifes.
I consider it very rude if people smoke nearby regardless of what they smoke. Especially near children or pregnant people.
Your attitude is stemming from the fact, that you don’t want to feel “bevormundet”. Fine for you, but the people around may not be able to avoid your smoke which causes them harm, so you take away their agency and autonomy by that. My freedom ends where I am hurting another person.
@@Narda185Oh, don't get me wrong... I am a non-smoker. Some might even call me a "militant non-smoker".
I'd love to see our governement do more to stop smoking, and for just about the same reasons that you brought here. It's dangerous, it's annoying, it's harmful not only to yourself, but also to the people around you.
And it's not even that I am against sharing international agendas... there are things that transcend cultural borders and need to be shared, based on our shared humanity.
The thing that annoys me is the ignorance of this fundamentals. It's people who promote something, not because it is objectively "better", but just because it is _their_ way... which means it _must_ be better.
As an unrelated example of this phenomenon: In a video about a police interaction in the USA, where a driver was stopped, harrassed and detained, because he had flipped off a cop who couldn't handle that, I pointed out that in Germany, insult was a criminal offense, and such a situation would play out very differently (if at all).
I made it clear, explicitly, that this was not meant as a comparison between the U.S. version of "free speech" and Germany civil laws limited that in these regards. I made it clear that this was about the behaviour of the police officer who acted out against something that was legal in the USA.
I got several responses to this comment... and every single one of them more or less tried to proclaim the objective superiority of U.S. "freedom" vs. the German oppressive system. People just were not able to imagine a system different from their own working... even when the topic was their system NOT working.
That's the point here. No offense meant.
I've had been working as a shop clerk in a boutique in germany a few years ago. It was one of the rare shop chains that require they're clerks to always greet customers and ask if they want assistance or just want to browse. 95% of the time people would decline the assistance.
I personally also prefer not getting asked these kind of questions by the clerks, to me that often feels like the clerks want to make a sale right as I enter the shop, while I just want to browse first. XDc
Yes, if I need assistance or have a question I'm going to approach the staff myself.
German here. I strongly dislike being talked to by employees in a store. "Can I help you with anything?"-"No, thanks. I'm just browsing". This inocuous exchange leaves me feeling ever so slightly worse than before because (subjectively, of course) they disturbed my peace of mind by talking to me and forcing me to interact and then I had to justify my presence in their store and basically apologize for being there without any specific purpose in mind. But I think the main difference when it comes to service in general is that American style service might seem submissive to Germans. The customer is king and you bend over backwards (or at least pretend to). That would make me feel uncomfortable. A waiter or sales clerk is an equal and should not humiilate themself or appear too eager in front of me. That's awkward. It's the waiters job to take my order and get the food to my table. If they do that with a neutral expression I assume they are professionals with confidence and a secure job. If they do that with an eager smile I immediately think they are just out for a big tip (and excessive tipping can also be problematic) - probably because their salary sucks.
In Germany it is also very rude to light a cigarette right next to a person who doesn't smoke, but most smokers just don't care.
I always make them care.
Nä, dass ist nur "rude" in deinem Kopf. 😂
@@RealEvilLordExdeath Definitiv nicht.
@@geraldtrumpp2340 doch 😂
Oder am rauchen wenn jemand anderes isst, auch bei rauchern unter sich. Fragt man nach ob's OK ist zu rauchen
i grew up in a small (german) village where you're supposed to greet people in the streets. when i moved to the city i noticed that people would be quite puzzled when i greeted them (by nodding and smiling). so now i do it for fun because i like their reactions and most people will happily greet back after overcoming their bewildermemt 😂
It is a noticeable difference on the country-side. Mainly because less people means less amount of different faces means you are more recognbisable and more interconnected between inhabitants. In a big city you're just a face in the masses... and it would take quite a while to greet everyone you encounter in the inner-city.
yes, exactly what janstratenrauch said: i also grew up on the german countryside. When you see people on the street there, you nod as a greeting, but that is probably, cause you now 3/4 of the little village you grew up in, or they maybe parents of a classmate, or something like that. I always saw it like this: you probably have met those people already and so it's nice to aknowledge those people. Now i live in a big city and if I'm in the middle of the shopping street parts, i mostly only encounter unknown people, who just wanna get through with everything as fast as possilbe like me, so there's no greeting. But the part of the city where my flat is, some people do the nodding as a greeting, either, because we really know each other. Or maybe just because we see each othe on the regular, and both know: oh, it's someone from the directer nighbourhood. But that does need some time, so I was already living here 2 or 3 years, before the first people on the street recognized me and nod-greeted me. so again, it comes down to knowing the people, at least to the degree that you know, it's someone from your street, or the next one. :)
I also grew up in a small town where my parents were well known, so HAD to greet everybody on the street, because they could know my parents and might know me - I hated this!
Now living in bigger towns i greet people because i know them or i just want to.
A friendly smile always comes back, even from strangers
My family is from Frankfurt, Germany but moved to the US before I was born. When I was younger I noticed a bunch of odd rules at our house compared to my friends. One rule that stood out was we couldn't vacuum on Sundays because it may disturb others. I later found out that Sunday is a Quiet Day called "Ruhetag" meaning day of rest and my family made this a tradition they still followed when they came to the States.
German here. While I live in Berlin, where these sorts of rules are not enforced/expected as strictly as elsewhere in Germany, I still feel bad every time I vaccum on Sunday or (God forbid) throw away glass into the glass recycling bin on Sunday (which is quite loud). 😅
The “smiling custom” in the US is also often mistaken for “romantic interest” by American men. (Just read advice columns, where male customers who make that “mistake” …. and the often female service staff or even random female “victims”…. talk about this issue. Having been a victim of “mistaken interest or flirting”… it’s no fun and can sometimes even be quite unpleasant.
Customer service always has two sides.
As a customer, you expect the desired products to automatically fall into your cart without having to do anything yourself. Of course, that doesn't happen.
As service staff, you don't want to hassle customers and give them the impression that they are being watched or followed.
Service staff cannot read minds. If I want good service, I have to express my wishes. And in a way that shows the staff the same respect that I expect from them. So friendly, factual and polite. Then any customer service can be very satisfying for both parties.
another thing:
i haven't heard of any other places where "karens" harass staff in the way it seems to be normalized in the US.
What is also a point: In Germany we don´t have so many cameras in stores and many of them are fake. So attention towards customers often also has to do with having an eye of them to prevent them of stealing expensive stuff. Maybe this was more a point in my childhood than today but it is a reason why I hate to much attention of the staff.
I am totally shocked! That we are only fourth on the table of rudest. There is room to grow!
I don't think service is better in the US. 4 weeks ago, I was in Washington DC. For the hotel, they charged 170 $ a night, so I did not consider this as a type of cheap hostel. Nevertheless, for the breakfast-coffee, they had only plastic cups. That is bad service, even if served with a smile ;)
And the "customer is always right" attidude comes with a cost: the prices. And german customers usually understand that.
I'm from Austria. I think the smoking culture is even bigger here than in germany. And as a non-smoker I hate it. I can't eat or drink outside in a restaurant anywhere because you will get smoked on. You can't sit outside with children because of this... About ten years ago you even could smoke in any bar or restaurant inside. I'm so glad it changed that much at least.
as a smoker i hate that too and i also don't smoke if someone nearby is still eating, even if that means not to smoke until i leave
thank you for that. I wish more people would be this considerate.
i know many people like me, but unfortunately it's a matter of wether you're bothered by it yourself or not 😩
@@DisturbedFox137 I guess it partly comes from the fact that smokers are naturally less bothered by smoke than non-smokers, so they often don't notice how bad it actually is for the non-smokers around them.
Regarding the smlling, i would like to add that we Germans tend to take people seriously when they do not smile, and we often feel being ridiculed when being smiled at.
Native German here: that’s the feeling I got in America. Everyone smiling at me because they had to not because they wanted to. I don’t need that. Give me an honest smile or shut up. 🤪
Weird. In the areas I live in NRW (North-Rhine Westfalia) it would also be considered rude if someone smokes directly into your face.
In most bars and clubs it is also forbidden to smoke?
I am not sure about Baden-Württemberg? I know some regions in germany have established special rules for allowing smoking in some areas?
Maybe in Baden-Württemberg it is still allowed to maybe smoke in bars? But I am not sure.
Because at least in NRW and other german regions it is not allowed to smoke in bars. As far as I know.
And even if it was allowed, at least for me and my friends, it would be considered pretty rude if you smoke directly into the direction where other people are eating.
he was talking about smoking outdoors! Yes, smoking inside has been banned in Germany for quite a while, which is WHY most smokers prefer to have tables outside, where they can direct the smoke up and NOT bother others so much. I am a smoker myself and whenever I‘ in groups of non-smokers, I get up and walk away when I have a smoke. Yet, it is almost surprising that especially America, that is so gung-ho about individual rights, does take such a firm stand on this particular point. What about an individual‘s freedom?
@@Attirbful Ah. K. I understand. But at least in my area you rarely see people smoking close to people who are eating.
And maybe it is a generational thing, but at least everyone I know would react badly if smoke gets blown towards them while they are eating or if they would see someone smoking close to people who are eating.
I personally don't think the smoking thing is something which is considered "normal" for germans or typical "german behaviour", which this video implies. Every german I know would also consider it rude if you smoke close to people who are eating. Everyone I know (and my friends are mostly german) would also consider it rude. And reading the comments, many other germans seem to agree that this is a rude thing. So I have to disagree with the statement that this is "acceptable" behaviour in germany.
But maybe Baden-Württemberg has a different mentality towards smoking than NRW for example? I personally don't know.
All the other aspects mentioned in the video I can 100% agree, even though I personally would say that those are not bad traits. :)
If i need help in a store, i can always ask. But i don't want to be asked if i need help. Then i always got the feeling that that want to sell me more, than i want to buy. That is the reason why i don't go to shops, where they alwas ask me if i need help. For some things I always go to a store at the other end of the town instead of a store of the same chain nearby, because they never let me shop quietly by my own.
Wenn man fragt, sagen die wo das ist. "Dritter Gang". Selten bringen die ein dahin. Ich glaube in America bringen die dich sofort dahin. Das schon nice
Good observations. You may compare yet another very different service culture: Japan. If the customer is always right in the US and treated like a king, then the Japanese customer is treated like an EMPEROR. But, both service personel and customers know that this is an arranged theatre of rituals, which both take for granted, so this is nothing personal. And when Japanese travel abroad, they are always baffled how rude things are in seemingly every other country (including the US) than Japan, and they feel very uncomfortable about it. Same thing about smiling. Japanese smile only in very distinct contexts, else they always show a "shiran-kao" (literally a know-nothing-face), void of any (possibly offending) emotions. Which is pretty close to the stiff upper lip of the British ... aren't culture shocks a nice subject to study ...
Thanks for the video (BTW I am German). Danke
The Japanese have the same annoying avoidance of saying no tho
According to Wikipedia Americans smoke as much as the French. So I don`t get that bragging about the restrained Americans. And don´t get me started on drugs and Cannabis. Here the USA leads the developed world.
I'm not German but Danish (similar culture). This video really opened my eyes for why I always see US Americans as being rude. E.g. who smiles in a classroom? Or any other place without any apparent reason? And if I walk into a shop and someone aproch me, asking of I need any help, even of my answer is yes, I know that I'll never return there. Overall, I've never understood why Americans see Germans as being rude, as I've always seen the Germans as being the most polite people I've encountered, next to the English. Although, I should point out that I've never been to the US
Same here. I come from Spain, but I've lived for 25 years in Germany. They are so polite people. And this withou having to smile the whole time. Always a Danke, Bitte, einen schönen Tag noch,...
Simply put... we (germans, and most neighbouring countries as well) can differentiate quite well between politeness and hypocrisy. Like, in a shop, supermarket etc - they want your money. Fact. Wether you feel happy or not - why care? Customers want goods or service, otherwise wouldn't come, right? They are not coming for employees' facial expression, except maybe in a table dance bar or a brothel. Especially grocery shopping better be quick, it is a necessity, not an experience. So, broadly grinning employees must be fake, right?
As a German, I would like to ask if you are going to address the elephant in the room and depict how we find the political norms of America quite ridiculous and narcissistic. For example calling us socialists while having extreme poverty issues, having so much gun violence while clinging to the right to own guns for the most unqualified people, being so susceptible to the own media biases not only in news but also in war-glorifying action movies, having police brutality issues while not realizing that they have no idea about deescalation rather even the opposite, behaving like exaggerted comedy characters in terms of being patriots and are DEADseriously requiring people to actually believe America is the best country of the world(Kindergarten!), being the breeding pool of the most bizarre extreme outlets of religions, I have ever heard of, calling yourself the greatest democracy while only relying on two parties as if that depicts the whole range of opinions possible. Your whole system is raising people to NOT be a team player. Opposition always behaving like football fans.......and so on and on... But yeah, all that madness was summarized well by Don't Look Up! Good self-reflection there.
Btw as a German I confirm that this wasnt meant to come off rude. I know Americans that are quite embarrased how they come off on world's stage.
And you should watch the bit of heute show when they interviewed Americans after Trump won the election. That was super funny, but in the not-purposefully way. :)
I'm from Berlin. We don't smile.
Serviceorientiert sein heißt nicht, ständig dümmlich zu grinsen, sondern dass was gewünscht bzw. notwendig ist schnell und korrekt zu erledigen. Ständiges Grinsen nervt. Ich habe vorwiegend gute Erfahrung mit dt. Kundendienst, falls mal nicht gibt es halt Stress. Wenn es den Amis hier nicht gefällt - wenn ich mich richtig erinnere, gibt es gut 190 Länder auf Erden, also ...
Suffering from a lung disease, i suffer terribly from smoke around me. It was horrible when smoking was allowed in restaurants, so the ban of smoking inside restaurants is definitely progress, but it pushed smokers outside. So i cannot eat outside in reastaurants because of the smoke. I am forced to eat inside to be safe from the smoke. I recommend that to you. There are designated smoking areas at train stations and airports. And most public buildings ban smoking inside, pushing smokers outside, so get inside quickly to avoid the smoke. I wish we had stricter laws to protect us. It is very difficult to get them here. That is why i am forced to eat inside always, very sad.
This is so true, so awful, that we must move where we eat to accomodate those who pollute the air for us. I hope you live in America where you have a chance to get away from the smoke.
There's this saying here: "The customer is king, but we live in a democracy"
Interestingly enough, if you move one country to Switzerland people are waaaaaay less direct. Swiss people communicate in the most passive aggressive way possible xD I've actually had multiple conversations about this with German exchange students. For all our similarities, we also have a lot of differences. We're often surprised ourselves, considering we're neighbours.
But one example of us not communicating as directly as Germans: let's take the smoking in public example. Here in Switzerland if someone lights up a cigarette in a non-smoking area, the most common way to deal with it, is to stew in your anger and say nothing at all. A lot of train stations are now non-smoking areas or at least heavily restricted. Swiss people also don't really talk to each other on public transport unless they know each other and even then talking too loudly is considered extremely rude. Now again: nobody would tell you this, but you instantly lose points if you do it.
Now to get back to the smoking example (also works for talking loudly as the strategies are the same): if i know someone there and am already talking with them, one thing i could do to let the person smoking in the non-smoking area know that their behaviour is unacceptable, is to tell my friend in a slightly raised tone (not so loud that it's considered rude - it would be in any other situation but not here - but loud enough for everyone around to "overhear") that I think it is terrible how some people think non-smoking areas don't apply to them. they should plan better and arrive on time to smoke away from the train station if they really needed the smoke or just do it at home. better yet, smoking is unhealthy they should quit. This is meant to be overheard by the smoker and let them know that they are the a**hole.
In this specific scenario, if I do not have a friend with me, i can also scan the people around me. Non-verbal communication will start when i make eye contact with someone. if I look at the smoker and make an annoyed face or role my eyes and they sorta respond in kind, it would be acceptable for me to loudly lament about the people who can't read signs or think the rules don't apply to them. this conversation will usually be held shorter than if I was talking to a friend and I will keep my musings to a minimum. the other person will then loudly agree with me and this opens up the interaction to any other people standing next to us, who are also annoyed at the person smoking, to add their agreement.
Now if the person is not smoking but just talking loudly on the phone, people might not say anything and the non-verbal communication is just a way to commiserate with each other and let off a little steam.
But yeah, if you're ever in Switzerland and you overhear someone talking about how bad they think people doing something you're specifically doing at that very moment is, then that is not just a random conversation but a message targeted at you to stop what you're doing. If you wanna be sure, try to see if they pointedly glance at you from time to time. Now, it could be that the person they're talking to doesn't share their concern and in that case, the person being annoyed at you loses a bit of leverage but yeah, this is how Swiss people tend to communicate their annoyance: it's passive aggressive as hell. Hope you enjoyed my wall of text xD
When sitting outdoors at a restaurant I hate it, when people sitting right behind you or next to your table light cigarettes. It's disgusting!
Have to say I agree ☝️
yeah, those people definitely don't get one of my rare german smiles :P @@PassportTwo
Eating and smoking outside often follows the "old rules": when everyone at >YOUR TABLE< has finished eating, then you "can" light a cigarette -> unfortunately the tables are much closer together these days ;) *
* Often you sit directly back to back and there isn't even a narrow "service aisle" between the chairs/ tables.
Sitting near noisy Americans ist also very annoying.
In my experiences the rudest persons are the nonsmoker…and that say a nonsmoker. The nonsmokers made such a terror, that is smoking inside of restaurants, bars and pubs isn’t allowed anymore. Now the smokers have to smoke outside. And what are the nonsmokers doing?…they go to that places and complain about the smoking close to them.
If you don’t want to smoke, ok.
If you are against smoking, ok.
But don’t complain, if you go to places, where is a meeting place of smokers. If you bother due outside smokers, shut up and go inside.
And reminding: I am a nonsmoker and I hate these behaviours!!!
Native German here. have been to the US and live since 2011 in Scotland. Born and raised in Frankfurt a.M. as also in a boarding school in Bavaria I couldn't agree more. You did a perfect job and I loved the "We have dinner, do You wanna come" video as it hits the spot so well.
Thanks as someone being born and raised in Germany with German parents but having american family that lived also in Frankfurt I grew up with both cultures side by side and everyone struggled a bit.
When we visited the US we stayed with my american Uncle and his family. He one evening at dinner asked me a question.
If I wanna do the evening prayer. He asked that question in absolute fine German. perfectly pronounced and articulated.
My instant reaction, not being able to speak english other than single words and knowing my Uncle only speaks english was to look over to my dad and asking "Was hat er gesagt ?" (What did he say).
Whole room starts laughing. I sit there shellshocked by that reaction and my uncle was also in a sense baffeld.
WE 2 understand what happend around 3 minutes latter and felt stupid.
So... some additions.
- 1. Well... germany or better said middle europe (or even europe as a whole) is historically one of THE places for immigration and constantly mixing cultures... except of course when someones understanding of history doesnt go further than the 17th century and the definition of "multicultural" is in fact "different skincolor". (What it often really feels like when i hear americans talk about history - nothing personal)
Over hundreds of years middle europe was a melting pot (or better said a "mosaic") of many different cultures and that diversity of germany is still very much present in all the different language-variations, despite many decades of being a more or less united country.
If i had to guess where the weird US "fake" smiling comes from, then it is probably much more the general culture of having an "extroverted" and a little over the top society. Where that comes from is a whole other discussion tho.
So... no, germany is a lot but surely not "new" to immigration, but clearly funded upon being a melting pot for immigration too. (And if language-barriers would be the reason for it, it would still not change anything. Everybody that ever heard some old germans speak their mother-tongue know what i mean. (Nen richtigen Bayrer oder Plattdeutschler versteht halt keine Sau xD )
- 2. Its about not getting annoyed. Most people that i know would get really pissed after a while, when some service person would treat them like a child that is unable to find stuff themselves. And if we ask where something is, then they will show you where and thats it. If you want more - ask more. And yeah "customer is king" my a**! If you behave like a piece of sh*t, then you will see similar responses from the personal. And i wouldnt want it differently tbh. Crazy how normal common sense works...
- 3. Interesting. Probably different on where you live, but from personal experiences, people keep it similar to point 2 or ask first if someone looks like they need help.
And for the "Besserwisser" (some prefer to call them "Klugscheißer"), i usually also think its not a bad thing trying to improve someones skills or knowledge. In general we tend to give others advice on many occasions or are mad about something being badly realized or made (some take it too far tho). But tbh how would things improve otherwise? With a fake smile on our lips?
- 4. Crazy how honesty can work wonders, isnt it? xD
- 5. Yep, vaping is "cool" in germany. Sad but true. Advertising is too good, directly targeting young people (especially teens and younger) and politicians are too slow + the tobacco lobby is pretty big and influencial. (Which also produce vapes of course)
My estimation is that German car salesmen smile more than average, but still less than the average US citizen. 😂
German here. I can totally see that we come across as rude. And let's be real, many people are rude, too rude even for my taste. Vice versa i find the constant over the top cheeriness and smiling in the US creepy AF.
If you are overtly friendly while selling us something we assume you are trying to screw us over. You don’t have a good product and try to compensate with grovelling.
I really hate going shopping in Amrrican stores. After the initial, "Can I help you?" and my, "No thanks, I'm just browsing" they stay glued to you anyway, just a couple steps away. And you can feel their "I WANT TO SELL YOU SOMETHING" brain waves beaming into your head.
If I want your help, I'll ask for it! Until then: GO AWAY.
Which is why I can't at all relate to your point on Germans giving unsolicited advice. Whatever you're doing (if you're a stranger), I'm staying out of it! And I've never seen other Germans act differently than me. We might offer some help if someone is visibly struggling. But if the offer is rejected, we back off in a hurry.
My favorite German idiom is “nicht gemeckert ist genug gelobt” (not complaining is enough of praise). It’s from Berlin I think but it could be from my northern Germany as well
Its not from Berlin, we in Bavaria said that for centuries 😂
You know it from Berlin because so many Swabians live there^^ it's definitely a southern phrase, said in deepest dialect usually
As far AS i know its called "schwäbisches Lob"
The question of Smoking: Well, nonsmokers fought years for smokefree restaurants and make smokers go outside. Ok, fine. I consider myself as a respectful smoker and never had an issue with smoking outside. Actually I prefer it myself by now. BUT: If someone has a problem with me smoking (or rather vaping) outside, he has the right to move inside to his granted smokefree space while I enjoy the sun outside with a beer. Fair enough I guess ;)
If tiramisu counts as cake, I'll go with cake. Otherwise I'll cheat and try to get a deliscous serving of Spanish flan.
6:15 Okay, yes. German customer service literally hangs up on you, when they do not want to talk to you anymore. Legitimately! It's unfathomable. Never experienced anything like it in the UK.
I absolutely consider it rude if somebody starts smoking next to me, but I’m also german enough to just tell them to either stop or leave.
And if it was me you were telling to leave, I'm German enough to tell you we're out side and you can f... off!
I as a German consider it rude if someone lights his cigarret right next to me in the outdoor area of a restaurant while I‘m still eating. It doesn‘t bother me much when I‘m only drinking something. But I can still remember a time when smoking actually was allowed indoor of the restaurants. Man, that was a bother. So I‘m considering it a huge success that smoking nowerdays is only allowed outside.
The other „rude“ behaviours in this video are quite funny from my point of view. Especially the thing with the smiles. Because, really, why should I smile if there is nothing to smile for, just for the sake of it? Nahhh… ;)
... it was quite painful to come home at night after spending some time in a smoky restaurant or club then. Your hair, your clothes, everything, just awful ...
Not for the life of me I will ever understand the obsession of US-americans about smoking. Outdoors.🤔
Smile - i hate that fake smiling and laughing. Kind of Respect?
Not in Germany, especially in Hessen, but a friendly face is good.
Even worse is the learned fake laughter in conversations.
I obviously smile a lot. People told me. I am German and when having had the reversed culture shock returning from the states I realized people here look dull straight onto the floor or into the air, minding their own business or being with their phone. They do open up all of a sudden when being 'activated'. When in school I got bullied a lot because I liked to laugh a lot or I just smile. I felt well in the states.
Heyyy in German Stadiums we habe a so called family block. Where most of the times family's are watching the games in in this particular area, smoking is forbidden. So it could be an opportunity if you don't wanna have people smoke around you 😊
It should be the opposite - a section of the stadium where people are allowed to smoke. And with such an air circulation system that the people around it aren't suffering.
Thanks for always making entertaining,educational and funny videos. ❤Even after what 4? Years in Germany. And yes smokers are amongst the rudest people. They don’t try to understand how disgusting their habit is to non smokers 🤢
You mean, it's almost like sitting amongst people eating pieces of dead animals is for a vegetarian?
@@graslurch3685One of the two is bad for the lungs the other is bad for your perception.
i have worked in retail and i've greeted customers with a smile when they were near me because that's how i am. but since i don't like to be bothered when i shop i wouldn't pay any attention to customers until they would come up to me to request help. then i would do my best for them.
edit: if you work with customers (be it retail, customer service or whatever) if both sides are polite and respectful there's no need to smile (but it can happen naturally 😉).
pro tip: the customer is not always right (!) and the employee is often not the one at fault so to be nice will most likely get you what you want 😁
I remember clearly the year that smoking in bars and restaurants was made illegal in Seattle, following California. What a relief. Then I moved to Germany and it took years before I could breathe clean air in a restaurant. And the loopholes! They were told to offer a room for smoking but instead, they offered a single non-smoking room with the door open the entire time, my life sucked if I wanted to eat out. Now, finally it's better. Except that the employees in my local Aldi AND my local Edeka smoke in the employee break rooms which are located in the stores so there are always parts of the stores that are smoke-filled. And writing letters to the management did nothing. I find it crazy that there is a large No Smoking sign at the entry to my Aldi, while employees smoke by the bread ovens in the back. How long must I wait for clean air in a German grocery store?
If you want something to be done about it, you should look for your local or communal Rathaus (online or in person). Then look for "Veterinäramt". The Veterinär is the hygiene inspector and he will be interested.
Write a bad Google review, that`s more effective. Then change the branch. I've never smelled a cigarette in a groery store in the last 20 years.
I would not agree with 3:10 germany was always a melting pot... and it is not just because of immigrants but because of how it came to be... so many cultures in 1 country from the very start :/ I feel that not understanding one another is definitly not "the" or even one of the reasons why americans smile more.
Also... Yes I am german... yes I do get annoyed slightly by smoking when it happenes right next to me... but I also try to understand since smoking is an addiction and in germany the rules about not smoking popped up very quickly and I do not think it is a topic often discussed with you doctor. (getting rid of that addiction I mean)
Also the growing smoking numbers might have come from covid to an extend.
so yeah... while I do not appreciate the smoke I understand that it might not be easy on smoking people in germany.
Sorry, but do you seriously think Germany is LESS culturally diverse than the US??? The country at the center of Europe with trading routes and great exchange of knowledge with workers from everywhere for centuries if not millenniums is supposed to be LESS diverse than the US, a comparatively recently established colony with a lot of European settlers and their slaves. Come on man...
Yes…
@@PassportTwo The main difference is, that the USA is not (anymore?) a melting pot, but a salad bowl. As a result, the USA looks more diverse, while in reality it is just more heavily segregated.
You do have cultural ghettos in Germany as well, sure. But due to a stronger integrating (for foreigners) and cooperative (for neighboring nations) culture, Germany might seem to be less diverse to the superficial american eye. While in reality it is much more diverse on a different scale, as it's much more open to hybridisation.
Fun fact: only 15.3% of americans are immigrants, while this is true for 18.8% of all germans.
The one thing the US has mastered, is the ease of being American and something else at the same time. You can be American and Irish, Italian or Turkish with zero problems, even as a first generation immigrant. Germany struggles with that concept a lot, forcing you to chose one identity, and even then Germany might not accept you as truly German because you look too different.
Note in the video I said that this smiling culture developed from a history of immigration and that Germany is a „relatively“ new immigrant nation that maybe hasn’t had time to develop this as a cultural marker of immigration. So quoting the immigration data and rates of today, doesn’t discredit that. Very interesting data though.
@@PassportTwo Yes, yes, the USA has seen a lot of immigration. But again: it's an assimilating country, not a melting pot. More like the borg really, than like the federation. In the USA you have a rather binary system: either you are an exotic segregated color in the salad, or you are completely assimilated, with a lot of noise about pretended "ancestry" but without much true substance.
And I completely disagree with your idea that Germany is a new immigration nation. That's completely nationalist nonsense. Germany has been at the center of trading and migration routes since the stone age. You'll be hard pressed to find many germans, that do not have polish, czech or french ancestry in a way that most americans would abuse to claim "I'm a [insert a nation here that they hardly know how to spell correctly]".
But again: Germany IS and always has been a melting pot. The two stone age migration streams met in Hassia, the celtic and germanic tribes mixed in central Germany as well, with gallo-roman and slavic migrations entering later on. Every invading army left its genetic and cultural traces. And even later, oppressed hugenottes, as well as slavic people from Poland, Bohemia and many other countries came during the industrial revolution.
It's understandable that you do not know such things, after all, it's not what's taught in the USA. But please, stop pretending you understand german migration history if you base your knowledge on rather one-sided information. It's not your fault to not know this, but it's your fault if you continue spreading it.
As a german, i don't want to be chatted at immediatly by sales clerks. I want to take a look around, get an impression on what the shop has to offer and if i fail to find something or am overwhelmed, then i wanna go ask for help. Anything else feels... kinda creepy and stalkerish. Like "let me at least have a few minutes to set my mind and get some orientation before coming at me like a hound trailing for prey". And i don't need anyone fake-smile at me. You don't know me, i don't know you, so let's approach each other like adults with open minds instead of Barbie-doll-like psychopaths with their staring, smiling faces. We smile but not at anyone and everyone.
Also... i don't know for certain but i wouldn't associate "Service-Wüste" with "unfriendly"... at least not in general. Yes, being rude can be part of that but mostly - to me - it is like: often employees won't go the extra mile or take some extra work that benefits the customer (not without paying for it). Service won't make sure the customer is happy, does feel comfortable or will return - in most cases. So the question "can i have this little extra/ can i have this special appointment" is in general answeres with "no" or "that would be 10€ extra". You won't get service just for the sake of customer-happyness.
One reason of the service level might be that in Germany tips are nice but not a fixed (or only) part of the income. And "The Customer is always right" attitude might be one reason for the "Karen" syndrome. :)
When someone next to you lights a cigarette, use the magic of german directness and thell him/her that he might step a meter (3 feet) away so that the smoke doesn't hit you in the face.
Germany being a "relatively new immigrant nation"? The Huguenots came here after Louis XIV. revocated the edict of Nantes. That was in 1685.
And then, many Polish speaking people came to the Ruhr area working as miners in 1870, which you still notice in the names in the area up to today.
Point is: They did not immigrate everywhere in the same ways, but neither did this happen in the US.
The smoking in public has significantly declined in Germany.
We used to have smoking in ALL RESTAURANTS, even in HOSPITALS.
They had to heavily legislate to limit smoking in most places.
Stadiums are among the last holdouts where people smoke recklessly like that.
Restaurants, train stations, hospitals, most private homes are strictly non-smoking zones.
In the 80s they measured how hip a place was by how far you could see on a Saturday night.
That's why at the favorite place my parents had, you called a waiter over by tipping the lamp hanging over your booth, because raised arms weren't visible from the bar. And if course the place would be so loud, hollering wasn't an option, either.
Sitting at a hotel pool in the US, we always find at least one smoker, who sharing his stinking air with us ... 😢
Neutral face in the US🙂
Neutral face in Germany😐
I'd rather have an honest working-here-sucks-but-i-will-do-my-job frown than an unconvincing this-is-the-best-day-ever grin when i go shopping. Behave like a human being, not some customer-pleasing automaton.
the smoking is IMHO rude especially when it's a "Raucherfreier Bahnhof" (Smoker-free Train-station), and Cake
Great to see Aubrey in the video. Hope the three of you are all fine.
Cake or ice cream? Tough one. It depends so much on the type of cake and the flavour of the ice cream.
As a German i can agree with you that a lot of people here are smoking. And I hate it. But unfortunately, the people that smoke without actually caring for their surroundings are also the ones that won't stop when you tell them to.
On the other topics: I find it incredibly annoying when people are superficially polite. It just doesn't feel genuine and I'd rather be treated a little more rude and know how people think about me. You don't know if you're in a good relationship or if it's just normal politeness with Americans.
Also a lot of times when I meet Americans here (Heidelberg), they act nicely but you can instantly see that they absolutely don't care. A lot of tourists come here and take photos of all the old buildings but then they ask questions that seem so awfully stupid that it is just obvious that they really don't care and are just asking this to be polite and to keep the conversation going. I'd rather not have any conversation at all instead of having to explain to them that the US Capitol building is not older than the Heidelberg castle, even if it looks like old architecture.
I can assure you that a lot of germans prefer actually caring about relationships and in turn, being a little more conservative towards other people, than just being polite all the time.
For me the most superficial and false behaviour is when people are smiling while speaking. This is unnatural. Some people are grinning all the time when they speaking. Very strange.
I hate it when people smoke around me, but I also still remember the times when it's been widely allowed indoors. There have been disgusting smoking carriages and people smooked in restaurants, bars and clubs. So coming from there it got a lit better.
As a German I don't like to go into empty shops where I would be the only customer, because the chance would be hoghwr that the staff would speak to me 😅
I’m quite a bit late but I want to say something to the smoking topic: I myself have quiet the problem with nicotine. If I smoke it or sometimes even just breathing it in passively I get really nauseous and sometimes can even end up throwing up. This said, I was at a festival last year waiting for one of my favorite bands to come up on stage. The crowd was packed and the guy right beside me decided it would be a good time to light his cigarette. I proceeded to ask him, if he could at least move a bit away, so that I wouldn’t inhale his smoke. He did that. And only that. I mean, I was thankful for it and didn’t really give it much thought, but looking back at it he really thought crushed in the 30 degree celcius heat between hundreds of people would be the best time to smoke. Our country really has a problem with smoking. Even I smoked for some time from 13 to 16 years old and I know quiet a lot of people that started smoking at the age of 13, 14. But somehow we can’t get away from it….
If you think this is a rude in germany, go to berlin. Real "Berliner" talk to everyone like your their oldest and best friend, they don't talk around something and say you're dumb direct into your face, if you do something stupid. Everyone is their pal.
But at the same time they're helpful to everyone like your their oldest and best friend, like "Of curse I moving the couch with you. With your leek arms you can't do it by your own. Looser"
Being in berlin is a cultural shock, even for most germans.
Unfortunaly the berlin culture is dying out, because the seemingly rudeness was punished by the political correctnes movement in the 90s and early 00s. Non-berliner doesn't understand it right away.
0:38 I'm sorry, can we unpick this? Who answered this survey? Was this global, or was this asked in the US?? If it's the latter, than yeah, does this hold any real value? As a European, I am annoyed by obnoxious, loud and fake-friendly Americans, so I think it's safe to say that our cultures are just really different.
To the smoking debate: I’m German and never had a smoke in my entire life. I have no problem in a beer garden if at the next table they’re smoking. We’re outside, pollution thins out. Because most of us Germans have the attitude “Leben und leben lassen!” which means a certain tolerance to things i would never do but accept them for others. On the other hand it’s perfectly ok for anyone over here to ask a smoker to stop smoking if kids are around - and this will not make me a “Besserwisser”. My American friends usually admit that our tolerance level is higher but they are also astonished how easily a problem can be solved by directly addressing it - without trying to avoid stepping on the other person’s toes. We can and should all learn from each other.
Thanks for this show, it also helps me to understand my friends and coworkers from abroad a bit better!
As a german, i almost always smile, and laugh alot, and so do all the people i know.
Germans like to walk around and looking thru the shops and be always asked if u want or need anything is very enjoyable for us we like our Peace and relaxing and if we need a service we go to them and asking then the most one do Help good.
I'm german and I really hate it, when people smoke next to me. I am a non-smoker for my whole life and I cann't stand the smoke and the smell of my clothes and hair afterwards. Beside the health risk it brings, when you breathe it in.
Here in southern Germany/western Austria it can happen that someone asks you if they can help you if you enter a store... which i really do not like at all, i want to look around for my own, if i have a question i will ask the staff myself...
And yes, as a non-smoker it hate it, that it is still absolutely accepted to smoke everywhere outside with no regards for others...
Wal-Mart actually didn't survive here because they ignored german laws and tried to push the American way, aka almost no workers' rights, onto the employees. The CEO was also arrogant about it so people simply stayed away
If you complain about smoking you should have visited Germany 20 years ago when smoking was still almost everywhere. Compared to back then smoking is almost non existing anymore
I goddamn hate smoking in crowded areas (or in my general vicinity). Especially at restaurants.
Don't know, why it's not forbidden already, as we banned it in a lot of places in Germamy.
Servicewüste in my eyes is more "not helpful" and not "unfriendly". They don't have to smile, they have to do their job.
Cultural norm 2 is not quite right. Many stores employee give you a good service. Yes you have to ask sometimes, because they dont want to assume or overstep your boundaries
I hate smokers, I am a German , I move away when people smoke outside next to me. ( but I have not been into a football Stadion. I love smiling😊
Oh and one more thing: "Ole ole, ole ola, der FCK ist wieder da!"
(That is the song of the football(!) team whose stadium was shown in the video)
Damn never realised we Germans don’t smile a lot and with the smoking thing ye I would find it rude when someone lithing it up infront on me
3:05 If that were true, people from Hamburg should be smiling more (large city, many immigrants). Not sure that is the case 😁
My experience living in the south of germany, service is almost always friendly and kind. Not constantly smiling but genuinely friendly.
"Sitting in the Biergarten you get hotboxed."
You obviously have no idea what hotboxing really means.
Do not worry, Non-Smokers do find it rude when there are people liting cigarettes next to them
as a german.. yes, smokers are everywhere and they don't care about non-smokers. That's why I always eat inside 🤮