Jesus christ this is SUCH a good talk, and I think very much the way forward in how we self-theorize. I would add that a LOT of people’s gender-based fears are based on sunk-cost specifically because the culture around it is soooo deterministic. Especially for cis people because they had even less time or incentive to question anything about their gender.
the Born this way/ Warped this way dichotomy really annoyed and frustrated me when i came out. (About who i can be attracted to, 20 years ago-about gender, 9 years ago.) my sibling isn't queer, so i couldn't chalk it up to the non-normative arrangement (stay at home as well as matrixial dad, breadwinner phallic/"No!" mom). Possibly identifications, sure, but then i saw how "post traumatic" heterosexual patterns of courtship could be when, as an "out" middle schooler & high schooler, both girls and boys would confide their issues about each other to me Lol and I've recognized more of my "normative"/expected-for-my- Assigned-Sex-At-Gender side of my attractions as I've been out of the closet too! So the "born this way" thing just feels like 'Yea, it's useful way to counteract phobia, but only on the phobic person's own terms, not mine.'
One can't intellectualized corporeality away. Asserting one idea and not resolving SJ langer's theories appears to be an impasse worth returning back to.
Here after Alexander Avila's video
I’m so grateful he brought me here. I think this is going to be big
i didn't see it but I'm subbed to Alexander Avila 😭
Incredible!
Jesus christ this is SUCH a good talk, and I think very much the way forward in how we self-theorize. I would add that a LOT of people’s gender-based fears are based on sunk-cost specifically because the culture around it is soooo deterministic. Especially for cis people because they had even less time or incentive to question anything about their gender.
just ordered your book. Thanks for your work!
conversation starts at 6:36
48:10 Who is being mentioned? Thank you for the great discussion!
the Born this way/ Warped this way dichotomy really annoyed and frustrated me when i came out. (About who i can be attracted to, 20 years ago-about gender, 9 years ago.)
my sibling isn't queer, so i couldn't chalk it up to the non-normative arrangement (stay at home as well as matrixial dad, breadwinner phallic/"No!" mom). Possibly identifications, sure, but then i saw how "post traumatic" heterosexual patterns of courtship could be when, as an "out" middle schooler & high schooler, both girls and boys would confide their issues about each other to me Lol
and I've recognized more of my "normative"/expected-for-my- Assigned-Sex-At-Gender side of my attractions as I've been out of the closet too! So the "born this way" thing just feels like 'Yea, it's useful way to counteract phobia, but only on the phobic person's own terms, not mine.'
One can't intellectualized corporeality away. Asserting one idea and not resolving SJ langer's theories appears to be an impasse worth returning back to.
58:08
wow