The hurt in your eyes is so unbearable. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. You are a very strong and beautiful woman, may your son Rest In Peace. 💙
My heart breaks for you, your sadness is palpable. After suffering 3 early miscarriages I realized one thing I was so grateful for...I never had to give birth to a sleeping baby. I hope your days get easier and your pain lessens even a little as time goes on.
I don't know how I found your channel. I was watching beauty gurus videos one minute and the next I'm watching your unpacking your hospital bag video. And I just finished watching all of your videos! I'm a mom of 2 boys and I'm in school too and watching you and remaining so strong while remaining honest and true to yourself made me look up to you! You are incredibly strong and resilient. You are an amazing mother ❤️ You're a reminder to me to always be an amazing mother to my little boys💙 Your beautiful Braxton is so lucky to have such a strong, beautiful mommy like you!
Jessica Mandujano Same with me. One minute I’m mastering a smokey eye, the next I’m crying and ruining it. Felly, you’re so brave for posting this. I also went through loss and sometimes it’s hard to voice what you’re feeling. I found comfort in your video.
I'm sorry mama. You are so strong and are the best mom Braxton could've ever asked for. You didn't walk in alone, your angel baby was right there with you, watching over your shoulder. He always is. Hugs.
I 100% believe Braxton is up in heaven with God and all the other babies born sleeping. Braxton isn't alone and neither are any of us. God loves us all. I pray for you and your family. God bless you. Sending interweb hugs. ♡♡♡
Don't stress about not being your usual self, you lost your baby its a BIG DEAL.. this will take a lot of time and don't feel bad for not wanting to do much.. your grieving and you need to grieve.. watching you makes me appreciate my lil one.. much love 🤗🤗
Thank you for making these videos! I lost my baby girl Olivia a little over 3 weeks ago born sleeping at 40 weeks and 3 days. I found your channel looking for some comfort in other mothers that are going through this or have been through this. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face and as sad as it is that I’m not alone I find great comfort in knowing I’m not alone. Thanks for sharing your story❤️
I just want to say I'm So sorry for your loss of your baby girl Olivia. My heart is with you. My son Moses was 38 weeks, Born still on October 10th 2018.
Lilian A i love your baby’s name, Olivia 💕 I’m so happy to hear the videos have brought you some comfort. I’m so sorry about your loss, my heart sank because your loss was SO recent and I remember that first month so vividly... it’s so hard and painful every minute of your day. Somehow it will get a little easier as time goes on ♥️
It really has been a really hard month. It feels like I’ll never get through this and I’ll grieve her forever. What are some things you do to just cope with daily life? I’m pretty much crying all day long right now. It’s just surreal like I don’t believe this really happened to me.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My son D’Andre was born sleeping 03/03/18. His first heavenly birthday is approaching and I am having so much anxiety. I miss him every day I still can’t believe this happen to me makes me sad that my oldest daughter is growing without her brother. Hugs and prayers to you and your family.
I pray baby comes to see you in your dream and answer all your questions, i pray he makes you laugh and i pray he wraps his tiny fingers around yours.... i'll pray now and always for you and BABY. You are so strong & not alone.. You are always with him 💙🙏
Just want you to know how you inspire all the time. Sometimes, I get so overwhelmed with my 9 month old and I realize how blessed I am even to have her. You make me a better mom and for that I thank you! Also maybe putting like an angel with braxs birthday and the day he passed on your desk, that way people can see it and you don't have to tell them all the time.
My sister’s second child was stillbirth, it’s been a little over two years and she still can’t stand looking at babies or hearing about them. She has been to therapy but it’s not working :( the father to her first child has full custody and won’t let her see her own child:( and I can see the same look in your eyes to my sisters eyes and it just breaks my heart💔 prayers to you❤️
I’m a postpartum nurse, and every time we talk about bereavement, fetal demise and maternal death I lose it. I can’t even begin to imagine how you’re feeling. I’m sending many prayers, and love to your family!
I came across your video by chance, by accident. I am glad I did. I wanted to let you know... You are going to be ok. You will get through this. I promise! My Parker would be 16 this year! So hard to believe. I thought I would NEVER be ok again. The first year was tough. Then it started to get better. Listening to you talk, I can see myself through you. You are walking my exact road. You will get through this and you will be ok. I am here, if you ever need to chat! ❤️
That was the hardest part for me was telling people that my twins were gone. I can’t explain quite how I felt, but I was embarrassed and didn’t want people to even acknowledge that I lost them. I asked my boss to talk to the area and tell them not to say anything about them and just act like a normal business day. After a week of people just going on BAU, it really started bothering me cause I wanted someone to just talk to me about it now that I was ready... but they were just following my request. I feel all of your pain and am crying writing this since it brings back flashbacks of my situation. Hugs to you mama ❤️
When I found out I could never have kids, I remember being so embarrassed, embarrassed that I couldn't have kids, embarrassed to talk about it, I just felt so much shame. 😞
I haven’t been pregnant myself.. I’m almost 27... but do look forward to it in the future. Don’t know you personally but I wish you NOTHING but the best. I will pray for you tonight💛
I’m curious how you feel about trying again What’s the thought process of wanting more kids or not Sending loads of prayers your way I have had many miscarriages but not a still birth and I have many of the same emotions and thought you do know you aren’t alone momma and you are being prayed for constantly ❤️❤️
Is been 3 month already that I passed throw the same, my baby was born on November 16 on a emergency c-section and passed away on November 22 2018 it’s hard but God will always be there, stay strong like I am you will be in my prayers 🙏🏽❤️ God bless you
Hello, I found your unpacking your bag video in my recommended videos and I just couldnt get enough of watching some of these other videos. And everything youre currently going through I went through twice within months of eachother. I was pregnant June2016 and lost my baby girl at 20weeks in Nov2016..Got pregnant again Jan2017 and lost my son at 16weeks April2017. I lost 2 babies within 5 months of eachother and coping at work was the HARDEST thing Ive ever experienced. I worked at a housing company so I saw people come in n out constantly, people that knew I was pregnant and so when I came back after my loss alot of the people asked how my pregnancy was going. Giving people that I saw daily the news about my loss was so hard and made me tear up every single time. I completely understand this difficult moment you are going through. I PROMISE it gets better. I now have a baby girl who just turned 1 on Feb18. Please stay strong Felly. There are people praying for you🙏
You are so precious! I love all the little thoughtful details you share. Have you ever seen the vlogs of "Waters Wife?" It's a channel about a couple that went thru Stillbirth with their son Beckett. I think right now there is no need for you to feel that you have to pick up the pace, or that you have to feel like you are lazy. You should take all the time you need to grief your son and just take it one day at a time. You are doing such a great job Mama. Your son is proud of you for sure ❤
Grandma Elaine I wish that I could take away your pain everyday, however I can't. I am happy that you have sought out other Moms that have had lost a child. My niece also had a stillborn son five years ago. Like you, she did everything right. After the autopsy they found out that she had some sort of a blood issue that passed on to the baby. She has since had a rainbow son who is 4 and a beautiful daughter that just turned 1. During her next 2 pregnancys she had to have some type of monthly injections for her blood. Please take one day at a time as you are a beautiful person inside and out. God has a plan for you and your husband. Please trust me. Hugs to you, hubby and "Braxton".
My mother carried my sister to full term. She almost died and My sister did not make it. She had 3 children 3 years apart when she got pregnant with my sister. She blamed herself because she was stressed to be pregnant so soon after her third child. I know everything happens for a reason and I would not be here today if my older sister did not pass. But seeing your pain and knowing my mothers pain, I feel guilty my sister passed and I only came to be because of it. You are so brave sharing your loss to try to help others. You are amazing and so strong! Thank you!!
I dont know how I found your channel, but just want to say you are sooo strong, I love elephants myself and everytime I see one I think of you and your baby! May god give you the strength you need ... just know your angel will be w you in every step you take !
I'm not a mom or anything- I'm a teenager. I randomly stumbled upon your channel and am going through a tough time right now. Your situation is completely different and much harder emotionally then mine, but your strength inspires me. It inspires me to keep going when I feel like I can't. Thank you. Braxton is watching from above
I understand that feeling. I still remember when I back to work when 1 month after the still birth. Luckily most of people already know and just came to ask me if I am ok and said something try to make me feel better. But actually no matter what they say, it will not make you feel better. I sometimes just rushed to the rest room and cry several mins and then back to work. I think you can cry and no need to pretend to be strong. I joined to a group of mothers who had similar pain, that helps. I also think that facing to the world (meet with the people outside of the family) is also the important first step for you to continue your life, your life with the love for your son forever. It is hard but we will survive with the love of the people around us and the love from the god.. I already have a son and I am expecting a baby girl at Jun end. I am still tearing when I shared this to you but in one day, I am sure you will be just like me, crying and smiling at the same time when you think about your son. All the best!
Ugh this is my worst nightmare especially all the 'what ifs?'. You are very strong. He will always be with you in spirit and protect you forever. One day you will make him a big brother
Oh hun you have been through a major trauma - one that will revisit you when you least expect it. Give yourself time to recover. You are doing so well. Being able to talk about it the way you are is so important. One day at a time. These events show you who your real family and friends are. Our loss made the local newspaper and people did one of two things - they either crossed the road and avoided me or total strangers would come up to me in the supermarket, say nothing but lay their hand on my arm and give it a squeeze. That meant the world to me. To not feel isolated in my pain. Every thought you are having resonates. Grief is definitely a process and it does hurt but you will move forward when you are ready. 😘
I’m sorry that you went through all of this but im grateful for these videos because now im here almost 3 months out from my own daughter’s stillbirth and it’s helping me so much.
Thanks for making this video. I related to a lot you said about going back to work. I have been back at work now for 2 weeks after delivering my angel baby almost 7 weeks ago. It’s bittersweet. Everything I do now is without my baby in my belly and it’s so sad. I have to work hard to stay present and in the moment. I remind myself to do it for my baby so she can be proud of me... just like you were saying. Sending you lots of love.
You are so amazing and my ignorance kept me be totally away from a member of my extended family when their baby daughter’s heart stopped at 24 weeks gestation. I couldn’t even put a single word for them:( to show support. I didn’t know if it was ok to say anything for the fear of saying the totally wrong thing. They didn’t speak about it so this made it even more confusing for the rest of us around them so thank you so much for allowing us to learn about this hard reality that some parents are forced to find them selves facing and, this just opens up a very difficult topic in a very sensible way because no one is assured 100% that all will go well.
Always feel proud of yourself. You are pulling yourself through something unbearable. Prayers for you. You are never going to be the same person again, you're a different person now. Your strength and bravery to share your story is beautiful.
Braxton has the best mommy. From heaven his looking at you and is so proud how strong his mommy is being. God has a beautiful angel with him and I know sometimes we don’t understand why things happen God does everything for a reason. 🙏🏻❤️
I went back to work one week after losing my little Isaac, the day after his burial actually. It’s been 2 months and I cannot seem to concentrate at all. Watching your video has made me realize I made a very poor decision in returning to work so quickly. I’ve tried to avoid the grieving process but it just doesn’t work that way. I’m sending you a huge hug and thanks for sharing your journey.
You are so strong. Baby Braxton is looking down at you and proud of how strong your being. It’s totally okay to be sad. You are amazing. Keep it up. Braxton is so proud I know it 💙
Such a beautiful individual, following your story has both educated me, while still allowing me to be understanding under the circumstances:( this is so heartbreaking. No one deserves this.
Braxton is very proud of you! You are a wonderful mother and your son will always be in your heart. You are a beautiful woman and way stronger then you think. I am so sorry that this happened to your family. I truly believe your sweet baby boy will watch over you and know how awesome his mom is!!
im sorry about your loss mama. i know exactly how you are feeling i lost my son alexander at 7 months in june 2018. i remember when i went back to work it was so hard because people kept asking me questions and stuff i ended up leaving my job because i couldnt bare the pain. but i just want you to know your time will come to have children in the future. i found out on thanksgiving i was pregnant again but with twins! i feel like god knew the pain i had gone thru and just decided to bless me 2× more. ive had the worst anxiety this pregnancy but i really am trying to have faith everything will be okay.
Thanks for making this video!! You are a strong woman and i will pray for you. I was watching a video about perfume and somehow saw your video about you unpacking your bag and tears just flooded. I didn't have a stillbirth but I had to make a hard decision in my life to terminate my pregnancy when I was 4 months pregnant in 2015. I was told my baby had turners syndrome and it was the hardest decision wether to have the baby either way or don't bring her into this world because she's not going to live a normal life. I felt like it was a nightmare also besides my child's father I really didn't have anyone to talk to about it and was really sad. A year later i got pregnant not planning it , and I have a 2year baby girl. 3 children in total. 20 yr old 10 and 2. I think you are very courageous and I am happy and sad that I saw your video because it kinda helps me a lil bit. You seem like such a sweet person and i know your baby would've had the best mom ever. Hugs and lots of 💝
I just wanted to say you’re such a strong and beautiful person. Braxton would be so proud of his mama. He’ll always be your baby boy ❤️ lots of love! ❤️
Im so sorry for what you have been through. If vlogging helps you in your healing process I will continue to watch. Because what you don’t realize is that you are helping others by sharing your story of your beautiful baby boy. God bless you and your family in your healing.
Hey sweet heart I lost my first child on 08/24/2018... I'm so sorry for your lost to baby Braxton .. I can definitely relate to your feelings and will keep you my prayers .
i almost never comment on videos but i’ve felt the pain of losing a child. i just wanted to say you’re so strong and we’re all rooting for you, your comments are filled with such hope and love for you. when i lost my baby i felt my heart break in a way i never thought it could, the pain never truly goes away but 4 months ago i gave birth to my happy, healthy little girl. nothing will ever erase the pain of losing your first child, but you will love again ❤️
If keep a picture of Braxton saying born still on you desk, you leave all questions up to the person across from you. You won't have to say much, the picture says it all. You love that picture, you love your son. There should be no reason for you not to have a picture of him. I just think that would help. I think some people would see it and might not say anything at all. Maybe only to say I am so sorry for your loss. However this way you don't have to explain. You are doing great. You got this...
Your not alone were all with you Braxtons Mommy I know the pain n your voice I admire you goin to work I had no1 to talk to didnt have no1 thought I was alone n no1 understand 💚🌻
With pain comes strength...... I am so proud of you for your courage and strength. I had a miscarriage back in 2015 and i cried watching your videos..... Since then i have had my 2 rainbow babies and still wonder what would he or she be like.... Everything will get better soon..... I admire you thank you so much for sharing ..... We love you Braxton......
Sending you all the love mama. Everyday you wake up, you are honoring Braxton by living and keeping his memory alive. It won’t heal over night and everyday will be a struggle, but you have a whole community of support. Never be afraid to reach out mamas. 💕 keep staying strong
You are so open and honest! Remember it’s not your place to make others feel comfortable. You do what feels best for YOU! Love you and you amazing videos Braxton will always be with so many of us forever because of how you have made us fall in love with him! 💙
My baby sister died 1995, she was diagnosed with hydrocephalus. I was 14 yrs old when she died after 24 hours my Mom gave birth to her. We were devastated.💔 But it is comforting to think, we have an angel up there, who watches over, and pray for us. Your story is relatable. Braxton is your angel. Keep on praying for healing.🙏
Your beautiful Your strong And always Braxton’s mama I know your hurt, all a little to familiar for me. I pray for you and I pray for us mothers who have this hurt for our lost babies. We will always carry them in our hearts.
I found your channel last night and have watched so many videos and subscribed already. I love you so much as a person and your channel but it's just as heartbreaking also. I can't imagine your pain and the loss of loosing a baby or child. I could never imagine loosing either of my girls at any stage of life. You're such a beautiful Mumma ❤❤
You are a strong lady. I go back to work today after losing my boy at 22 weeks gestation. One of my good friends gave birth 3 days before I delivered my baby and I’m extremely anxious and angry. Luckily I came across your video. It’s been one month since I found out he wasn’t ok, but this gives me a little courage before I walk through those doors.
I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful son. Although I cannot begin to imagine the hurt you must feel, I am so glad that I found you because watching your videos makes me cherish my beautiful daughters that much more. I just picked up my 5 month old to hold her that much tighter. Continue to be strong for your son, your an amazing mom for honoring his memory as you do!
Going back to work was hard after my loss and it was inevitable that I ran into people who knew I was pregnant and they would ask about my pregnancy and I would have to tell them what happened. It sucks that then you find yourself consoling them almost and trying to make them feel better. Or some would make ignorant comments that were unintentionally hurtful. You are so brave mama and absolutely Braxton is so proud of you every single day. I'm sure you are his hero💞
Your still mourning your loss is still fresh. Allow yourself to very gradually get back to the old usual you. It might take a full year sometimes less sometimes more. Everyone is different.
I don’t know how you came up on my feed, but I’m glad you did! I totally can’t relate to anything you’re going through but thank you for sharing. You’re so strong!
I lost my son when I was 40 weeks 2days on 2/15/18. When I went back to work no one asked or talked about my loss and it still hurts even a year later no one reached out to me besides my manager. It was hard also because one of my co workers was pregnant at the same time and her her baby a month before I did. So they would ask her how her daughter was doing in front of me with no care knowing my son had passed away. I'm glad you had support its super hard when you dont have any at all.
I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that nobody asked or talked about your loss. When I recorded this video my experience wasn’t too bad, but now that I’ve been back for a longer time, I feel like it’s getting more difficult. My coworker is going through her pregnancy and we have so many clients that come In and talk to her about her baby allllll day long. It’s really hard. I just wish my son was here
I’m so sorry you had this experience. People who find it difficult to deal with your situation need to put themselves in your situation and know that to say something and risk upsetting you is better than saying nothing and still upsetting you and I know this from personal experience. I had people I knew cross the street rather than talk to me. I felt totally isolated as a result of their inadequacy.
People generally feel uncomfortable with death. They probably really do care about your loss but they just might not know how to approach the topic. They might be scared of saying the wrong thing or that bringing up your baby will make you upset.
I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️❤️ my first daughter died 7 years ago 2 days after she was born due to a placenta rupture. Going back to work was sooo hard. Everyday I would come home crying. But everyday it was less each time. I also didn’t get my confidence back until my 4th pregnancy. So many things come with grief and you really don’t know how your emotions will arise. Praying for you and your husband. I promise things will get better. It sounds so cliche but it’s true. 💜💜
I lost my twins July 29th. I had them at 21 weeks due to short cervix, my first pregnancy. I had to push both babies out. My daughter died a few mins after being delivered and my son passed a week later in the nicu. I been heartbroken every since. I pray for your healing and any woman that experience this
I'm so sorry for your loss, I can't put into words how that must feel. I hope soon you'll find faith to keep going forward, not to forget him ever but to keep living for yourself and your husband. You got this!!!! Prayers your way.
I'm currently taking two classes this semester and I am also working. I have to admit it's a struggle, much like you I though things would be so different. I agree with the statement you made about things seeming bland. I'm still grappling with accepting all of the loss that came with losing my Moses. It is also difficult for me to look at pictures of him because the amount of hurt i feel is unbearable. I have a picture of his hands next to his urn in my room and I keep a light on for him at night. Around the time of my loss there were several women who would soon be due. Now those babies are just reminders of age and milestones my son will never know. I try my best to clebrate the holidays with rearranging his area, we just did it for Valentine's day. I dont have to many people to talk to so thank you for allowing me to Express what I'm going through. Felly thank for being a support. I just want to say I'm proud of you and admire your fighting spirit. Thank you for each one of your videos. Moses's mama ❤
Desiree Diaz Desiree Diaz thank you so much for this message ♥️ I also have certain pictures of Braxton that just make me cry every time I see them. There are some photos that the nurses took of him right after I gave birth, and he just looks so small, beautiful and innocent. I just think, “it’s not fair that Braxton never had the opportunity to live his life” I know he was going to be such an amazing boy. Two weeks after Braxton passed away, one of our neighbors came home with her newborn baby. It was torture. I used to go sit on the rocking chair in Braxton’s nursery and I could just hear her baby crying from there 😔 all I wanted was to hear BRAXTON’S cry ! I’m so thankful that they moved away in December because it would have been really hard to see their baby growing up and knowing that that’s how Braxton would have looked ... Hugs ♥️♥️♥️
I’m praying for your pain to ease, I tear up almost every time your voice cracks because I can’t imagine the feeling of losing a child. as a teen mom this was my biggest fear because I had a complication towards the end of my pregnancy, I’m very heart broken for you, but I’m praying for your pain to ease and for you to once regain happiness once again, Braxton is always around hes always listening remember he loves you since the moment he was conceived ♥️
Hey I don’t know how I made it to your channel but I’ve watched all your videos when I was younger I seen my mom goes through two miscarriages at about 24 weeks and it’s been the most painful things. I pray you find peace in your heart and just know that Braxton is in heaven waiting for you very anxiously so yes we will all hug our babies that were taken too soon because I’m sure he is up there playing with my little brothers that I very much miss Sending much love to you
Hello mamma I think of you & your family often . Sending Love&Prayers to you . R.I.P BRAXTON 💙👑✨🦋🧸🙏🏽 Love from Toronto, Canada 🇨🇦. I keep you in my daily prayers. I pray each day u get a bit stronger . You are stronger then you think mamma💙 I love you even tho u don’t know me. You& Braxton touched my heart forever. 🙏🏽💙🙏🏽
I had miscarriage exactly two weeks ago with my 8 week old baby. Before, I never understood the pain of losing a baby even if I knew people that had miscarriages.. Until it happened to me. The pain is unbearable. I still cry almost everyday thinking about that heartbreaking day ever of my life. The emotions after the doctor have told us that my baby doesn’t have a heartbeat anymore was the worst news I have ever heard. Even if we just heard his/her heartbeat on 2 sonogram appointments (a week and a day) before the miscarriage. Me and my fiance were lucky enough to have a good support system. We were allowed to take some time off from work. Families, friends and co-workers constantly checking on us. I am scheduled to come back to work on Monday and I don’t know what to do or to expect. I don’t know how will I respond to some co-workers if they ask me what exactly happened or how am I coping up etc. I don’t want to breakdown and cry in front of them and feel bad for me. This video is very helpful on how to prepare and compose my self when I go back to work. I may not exactly felt your pain after your loss with baby Braxton, but I understand how hard it was for you and your family. I admire you for sharing your story and will continue to pray for you. Our angel babies will be forever in our hearts, watching over us. 👼🏼♥️
I am so very sorry that you have had to endure such pain,loss,,and sorrow. You are strong and be gentle with yourself you can grieve how you need to and how long you need to. Im sure it's hard in just everyday life. You were blessed to have had him even of it was a short time. My heart is breaking for you. But allow yourself time to heal. Again I am so sad for you and praying you find peace.🌻💜
Awe I’m so sorry for you loss my mom had a bad Infection during her pregnancy and was rushed to a emergency c-section and got my little sister out born 1 pound they said she wouldn’t at the time I had another sister and we was slim on money so staying in the hospital (she was in the nicu) was hard it cost 74,000 like the first week of staying there not counting gas money because my dad was a cop so when she was rushed to the hospital he had to drive up to the hospital and going home for stuff etc she will be 3 this year. I am very surprised she lived but she still has a very rough time with being weak and small for her age she’s 2 and looks like she’s 8 months old or something I am very sorry about your loss hope everything goes well in the future 💗
Felly, you are a strong and beautiful woman. I am catching up on your videos and you are to be admired. My heart aches for you. Much love to you, always Braxton's Mom.❤
Hi felly, these videos I’ve stumbled across today and I’ve learned a lot from your videos, the way you keep his memory alive and what you do for comfort makes me want to do the same. I lose my daughter Ruby 11-4-2013 at 20 weeks, baby peanut 12-1-2014 at 6 weeks and baby bean 14-12-14 also at 6 weeks and although it’s been years it still hurts just as much as the day I lost them😢 thank u so much for the support you show other angel mums and for sharing your story, lots of love x
You are such a strong & Beautiful Mama ❤️ Praying for your healing. I has a miscarriage at 11 weeks & I can't even begin to imagine your pain. Wishing you all the best ❤️ Baby Braxton is watching over you! What a beautiful baby boy ❤️
My heart breaks for you, this will never be easy to deal with through life because you will always have something to remind you of what happened. But you are still a mommy a beautiful mommy and a strong mommy. No words can ever make u feel any better but keep your head up talk to your baby every day he will always be with you. I lost my baby 3 years ago and till this day its still not easy to deal with. And remember its ok to cry and to vent there will always be someone who relates to your situation keep posting your beautiful videos mommy. Much love to you 😙
I wish I had the proper Words to tell you everything’s going to be okay but it’s really something that will always live with you . After loosing my daughter 9 years ago I can tell you that it’s a pain that never left my heart , I just learned to live with the heartbreak. I believe a piece of me died that September 18 . I will always remember her smell ,her beautiful face, and her adorable smile . My daughter was only 3 months old and died of a terminal brain condition. I carried my daughter for 9months, I was constantly in the hospital refused the abortions the doctors offered me many times saying I could die in the process of birth ,having her ,falling in love with her just to loose her . ??It hurts!until this day it fuckin hurts !but you know what I’m okay ,I’ve lived thru it and you can too ! Give yourself time to heal ! Cry,scream,stay in bed for as long as you need but when you are done get back up and do everything in dedication to your son ! You are not alone . Sending you hugs and wishing you nothing but the best may your angel Rest In Peace ❤️
You are so beautiful 😍 and I know Braxton is proud of you bebe as you are him, there’s a brighter end to this dark tunnel and when you find it to make you stronger I hope you eventually feel betters, never forget but only let it make you stronger. You are so strong and beautiful I can understand why you felt like a robot without him cause your kinda goin through something that hurts so much you can’t enjoy anything else you can’t get depressed tho please stay strong mama he still lookin at you I seen your hummingbird video it made me think Braxton sent those he’s saying hello 👋🏻 and that elephant 🐘 is the cutest try getting a hobby to take your mind off things, when I’m sad I enjoy swimming 🏊♀️ or drawing ✍️ 💓 it’s good to talk about things cause holding them in can make it worse 😭
Everytime I watch one of these videos I just ball my eyes out with you. I don’t know what it’s like to go through what you went through but somehow I feel you pain when you talk about it.. one thing I know forsure is you have one handsome guardian angel. My cousin son passed away when he was 9 months old and they let off balloons with messages on them every year! I’m not sure if you would want to do that but it’s a idea. My prayers are with you and your husband girl. ❣️
Have you looked into Reborn Dolls? You can basically get the looks and feel of sweet baby Braxton in a doll form. I’ve heard they’re really helpful for mothers of stillborns, just to have the feel and the look of your angel.
God bless you!!!! Continue to look forward and be happy with whatever happens ❤️❤️ You are strong you are a fighter & god will bless you with much more 💕💕💕
Death sucks. This year though it is only a parent I lost my mom in January. She had her final earthly birthday Jan 1 2019 on a respirator, and died 14 days later. Mom had lost 3 boys before I came along and I was her first born survivor. Now she's also gone. My love and prayers are with you. God bless you and comfort you as He has me. Love from Canada 🇨🇦🦄🐩🌹🏵💐🌸😢👍🤗
The hurt in your eyes is truly heartbreaking. I hope that this doesn't come off as insensitive to your loss, but do you think that you will try again? I miscarried my first, I commented about it on your still birth story video. I know it probably doesn't feel like it now, but I can see that you have so much love in your heart and I'm hoping you will try again because your live child will make the pain more bearable. You never forget the loss, but it eases a bit over time. All of our babies are watching over us and we will be reunited one day. A really beautiful concept about death is from Thich Nhat Hanh it's called It's Like A Cloud Up In the Sky.
I just came across your channel and I’m so sorry for your loss. I don’t mean to be rude or over stepping or anything like that but I’m curious if you are receiving therapy or going to counseling? A loss is a very traumatic experience and you should get all the time and help you need to grieve. Again I’m not trying to be rude but it helped me so much, I didn’t lose my son but I had him premature and I had a lot of trouble coming to terms with it and I can’t even imagine what your are going through. Lots of love and best wishes to you 💕
We all still exist when we leave earth, just in different forms. He still exists! You will see him again one day. And he will send his sibling down to you guys. He left early because his little brother or sister had to come.
My husband and I have been trying almost 7 years. We lost 3 early on around 12 weeks. He knows about 1 of them. No one else but my doctor knows I even want another. When I told people about the 1st one people told me I should be grateful for the one I have like it totally negates the loss. The first one would have been due on my birthday. My husband has none of his own but he raises my 10 year old as his own. I even had people tell me it was God’s way of telling me I couldn’t handle a second child. Well I shouldn’t say people. The only people who knew about the 1st one was my Gram and an aunt so it was those people who made the comments. My husbands friends acted like he dodged a bullet by losing the baby so he never spoke of it again. 2nd one I told no one. Only the doctor who did the test knew. 3rd only a nurse knew. I didn’t tell my husband. Month after month has turned into years. Now I just pretend I’m not much of a kid person when in reality I’ve cried myself to sleep every night for 6+ years.
Love, you don’t need to accept what happened to Braxton. That is something impossible for a Mother to do. All you can do is learn to live everyday with the pain. The pain won’t be this strong forever, you will be able to think of him without crying and instead smile. Grief is a process. Prayers to you and your family and baby Braxton. ❤️
The hurt in your eyes is so unbearable. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. You are a very strong and beautiful woman, may your son Rest In Peace. 💙
Tiffany Castro I agree. You can feel her pain through the screen. Bless her.
My heart breaks for you, your sadness is palpable. After suffering 3 early miscarriages I realized one thing I was so grateful for...I never had to give birth to a sleeping baby. I hope your days get easier and your pain lessens even a little as time goes on.
Would Your husband be willing to do a video and talk about his experience?
I don't know how I found your channel. I was watching beauty gurus videos one minute and the next I'm watching your unpacking your hospital bag video. And I just finished watching all of your videos!
I'm a mom of 2 boys and I'm in school too and watching you and remaining so strong while remaining honest and true to yourself made me look up to you! You are incredibly strong and resilient. You are an amazing mother ❤️ You're a reminder to me to always be an amazing mother to my little boys💙
Your beautiful Braxton is so lucky to have such a strong, beautiful mommy like you!
Jessica Mandujano Same with me. One minute I’m mastering a smokey eye, the next I’m crying and ruining it. Felly, you’re so brave for posting this. I also went through loss and sometimes it’s hard to voice what you’re feeling. I found comfort in your video.
Same
Me too
I'm sorry mama. You are so strong and are the best mom Braxton could've ever asked for. You didn't walk in alone, your angel baby was right there with you, watching over your shoulder. He always is. Hugs.
I 100% believe Braxton is up in heaven with God and all the other babies born sleeping. Braxton isn't alone and neither are any of us. God loves us all. I pray for you and your family. God bless you. Sending interweb hugs. ♡♡♡
Braxton IS in Heaven with my 3 brothers, son and husband. 😉🌸💐🏵🌹🙊🦄🐩🇨🇦
Don't stress about not being your usual self, you lost your baby its a BIG DEAL.. this will take a lot of time and don't feel bad for not wanting to do much.. your grieving and you need to grieve.. watching you makes me appreciate my lil one.. much love 🤗🤗
i’ve cried so many tears for you sweet girl... praying for you always
Thank you for making these videos! I lost my baby girl Olivia a little over 3 weeks ago born sleeping at 40 weeks and 3 days. I found your channel looking for some comfort in other mothers that are going through this or have been through this. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face and as sad as it is that I’m not alone I find great comfort in knowing I’m not alone. Thanks for sharing your story❤️
I just want to say I'm So sorry for your loss of your baby girl Olivia. My heart is with you. My son Moses was 38 weeks, Born still on October 10th 2018.
Lilian A i love your baby’s name, Olivia 💕 I’m so happy to hear the videos have brought you some comfort. I’m so sorry about your loss, my heart sank because your loss was SO recent and I remember that first month so vividly... it’s so hard and painful every minute of your day. Somehow it will get a little easier as time goes on ♥️
It really has been a really hard month. It feels like I’ll never get through this and I’ll grieve her forever. What are some things you do to just cope with daily life? I’m pretty much crying all day long right now. It’s just surreal like I don’t believe this really happened to me.
Thank you! I’m sorry for your loss as well. It’s so hard to try and cope!
I’m so sorry for your loss. My son D’Andre was born sleeping 03/03/18. His first heavenly birthday is approaching and I am having so much anxiety. I miss him every day I still can’t believe this happen to me makes me sad that my oldest daughter is growing without her brother. Hugs and prayers to you and your family.
I pray baby comes to see you in your dream and answer all your questions, i pray he makes you laugh and i pray he wraps his tiny fingers around yours.... i'll pray now and always for you and BABY.
You are so strong & not alone..
You are always with him 💙🙏
You are such a strong and courageous person. Braxton is DEFINITELY proud of his mommy. He is in Heaven with God and will see you again one day.
Just want you to know how you inspire all the time. Sometimes, I get so overwhelmed with my 9 month old and I realize how blessed I am even to have her. You make me a better mom and for that I thank you! Also maybe putting like an angel with braxs birthday and the day he passed on your desk, that way people can see it and you don't have to tell them all the time.
My sister’s second child was stillbirth, it’s been a little over two years and she still can’t stand looking at babies or hearing about them. She has been to therapy but it’s not working :( the father to her first child has full custody and won’t let her see her own child:( and I can see the same look in your eyes to my sisters eyes and it just breaks my heart💔 prayers to you❤️
I’m a postpartum nurse, and every time we talk about bereavement, fetal demise and maternal death I lose it. I can’t even begin to imagine how you’re feeling. I’m sending many prayers, and love to your family!
I came across your video by chance, by accident. I am glad I did. I wanted to let you know... You are going to be ok. You will get through this. I promise! My Parker would be 16 this year! So hard to believe. I thought I would NEVER be ok again. The first year was tough. Then it started to get better.
Listening to you talk, I can see myself through you. You are walking my exact road. You will get through this and you will be ok.
I am here, if you ever need to chat! ❤️
That was the hardest part for me was telling people that my twins were gone. I can’t explain quite how I felt, but I was embarrassed and didn’t want people to even acknowledge that I lost them. I asked my boss to talk to the area and tell them not to say anything about them and just act like a normal business day. After a week of people just going on BAU, it really started bothering me cause I wanted someone to just talk to me about it now that I was ready... but they were just following my request. I feel all of your pain and am crying writing this since it brings back flashbacks of my situation. Hugs to you mama ❤️
When I found out I could never have kids, I remember being so embarrassed, embarrassed that I couldn't have kids, embarrassed to talk about it, I just felt so much shame. 😞
I haven’t been pregnant myself.. I’m almost 27... but do look forward to it in the future. Don’t know you personally but I wish you NOTHING but the best. I will pray for you tonight💛
I’m curious how you feel about trying again
What’s the thought process of wanting more kids or not
Sending loads of prayers your way
I have had many miscarriages but not a still birth and I have many of the same emotions and thought you do know you aren’t alone momma and you are being prayed for constantly ❤️❤️
Brittny Mundt I’m curious about this too
She's 7 months pregnant now. :)
Is been 3 month already that I passed throw the same, my baby was born on November 16 on a emergency c-section and passed away on November 22 2018 it’s hard but God will always be there, stay strong like I am you will be in my prayers 🙏🏽❤️ God bless you
thaliana lynn I am so very sorry for your loss. Bless you!
Thank you @Brandi 🙏🏾
Braxton will be back one day he just wasn’t ready
Your comment made me cry
No he wont
• oetori • their souls do 👏🏻
Stephanie Garcia he’s not coming back he is in heaven waiting for the day mommy goes to heaven with him
Hello, I found your unpacking your bag video in my recommended videos and I just couldnt get enough of watching some of these other videos. And everything youre currently going through I went through twice within months of eachother. I was pregnant June2016 and lost my baby girl at 20weeks in Nov2016..Got pregnant again Jan2017 and lost my son at 16weeks April2017. I lost 2 babies within 5 months of eachother and coping at work was the HARDEST thing Ive ever experienced. I worked at a housing company so I saw people come in n out constantly, people that knew I was pregnant and so when I came back after my loss alot of the people asked how my pregnancy was going. Giving people that I saw daily the news about my loss was so hard and made me tear up every single time. I completely understand this difficult moment you are going through. I PROMISE it gets better. I now have a baby girl who just turned 1 on Feb18. Please stay strong Felly. There are people praying for you🙏
You are so precious! I love all the little thoughtful details you share. Have you ever seen the vlogs of "Waters Wife?" It's a channel about a couple that went thru Stillbirth with their son Beckett. I think right now there is no need for you to feel that you have to pick up the pace, or that you have to feel like you are lazy. You should take all the time you need to grief your son and just take it one day at a time. You are doing such a great job Mama. Your son is proud of you for sure ❤
Grandma Elaine
I wish that I could take away your pain everyday, however I can't. I am happy that you have sought out other Moms that have had lost a child. My niece also had a stillborn son five years ago. Like you, she did everything right. After the autopsy they found out that she had some sort of a blood issue that passed on to the baby. She has since had a rainbow son who is 4 and a beautiful daughter that just turned 1. During her next 2 pregnancys she had to have some type of monthly injections for her blood. Please take one day at a time as you are a beautiful person inside and out. God has a plan for you and your husband. Please trust me. Hugs to you, hubby and "Braxton".
My mother carried my sister to full term. She almost died and My sister did not make it. She had 3 children 3 years apart when she got pregnant with my sister. She blamed herself because she was stressed to be pregnant so soon after her third child. I know everything happens for a reason and I would not be here today if my older sister did not pass. But seeing your pain and knowing my mothers pain, I feel guilty my sister passed and I only came to be because of it. You are so brave sharing your loss to try to help others. You are amazing and so strong! Thank you!!
I dont know how I found your channel, but just want to say you are sooo strong, I love elephants myself and everytime I see one I think of you and your baby! May god give you the strength you need ... just know your angel will be w you in every step you take !
I'm not a mom or anything- I'm a teenager. I randomly stumbled upon your channel and am going through a tough time right now. Your situation is completely different and much harder emotionally then mine, but your strength inspires me. It inspires me to keep going when I feel like I can't. Thank you. Braxton is watching from above
I understand that feeling. I still remember when I back to work when 1 month after the still birth. Luckily most of people already know and just came to ask me if I am ok and said something try to make me feel better. But actually no matter what they say, it will not make you feel better. I sometimes just rushed to the rest room and cry several mins and then back to work. I think you can cry and no need to pretend to be strong. I joined to a group of mothers who had similar pain, that helps. I also think that facing to the world (meet with the people outside of the family) is also the important first step for you to continue your life, your life with the love for your son forever. It is hard but we will survive with the love of the people around us and the love from the god.. I already have a son and I am expecting a baby girl at Jun end. I am still tearing when I shared this to you but in one day, I am sure you will be just like me, crying and smiling at the same time when you think about your son. All the best!
Ugh this is my worst nightmare especially all the 'what ifs?'. You are very strong. He will always be with you in spirit and protect you forever. One day you will make him a big brother
Oh hun you have been through a major trauma - one that will revisit you when you least expect it. Give yourself time to recover. You are doing so well. Being able to talk about it the way you are is so important. One day at a time. These events show you who your real family and friends are. Our loss made the local newspaper and people did one of two things - they either crossed the road and avoided me or total strangers would come up to me in the supermarket, say nothing but lay their hand on my arm and give it a squeeze. That meant the world to me. To not feel isolated in my pain. Every thought you are having resonates. Grief is definitely a process and it does hurt but you will move forward when you are ready. 😘
I’m sorry that you went through all of this but im grateful for these videos because now im here almost 3 months out from my own daughter’s stillbirth and it’s helping me so much.
Thanks for making this video. I related to a lot you said about going back to work. I have been back at work now for 2 weeks after delivering my angel baby almost 7 weeks ago. It’s bittersweet. Everything I do now is without my baby in my belly and it’s so sad. I have to work hard to stay present and in the moment. I remind myself to do it for my baby so she can be proud of me... just like you were saying. Sending you lots of love.
You are so amazing and my ignorance kept me be totally away from a member of my extended family when their baby daughter’s heart stopped at 24 weeks gestation. I couldn’t even put a single word for them:( to show support.
I didn’t know if it was ok to say anything for the fear of saying the totally wrong thing. They didn’t speak about it so this made it even more confusing for the rest of us around them so thank you so much for allowing us to learn about this hard reality that some parents are forced to find them selves facing and, this just opens up a very difficult topic in a very sensible way because no one is assured 100% that all will go well.
Always feel proud of yourself. You are pulling yourself through something unbearable. Prayers for you. You are never going to be the same person again, you're a different person now. Your strength and bravery to share your story is beautiful.
Braxton has the best mommy. From heaven his looking at you and is so proud how strong his mommy is being. God has a beautiful angel with him and I know sometimes we don’t understand why things happen God does everything for a reason. 🙏🏻❤️
I went back to work one week after losing my little Isaac, the day after his burial actually. It’s been 2 months and I cannot seem to concentrate at all. Watching your video has made me realize I made a very poor decision in returning to work so quickly. I’ve tried to avoid the grieving process but it just doesn’t work that way. I’m sending you a huge hug and thanks for sharing your journey.
I hope you keep posting videos! I would love to see the progressing throughout the years! You aren’t alone mama
You are so strong. Baby Braxton is looking down at you and proud of how strong your being. It’s totally okay to be sad. You are amazing. Keep it up. Braxton is so proud I know it 💙
Such a beautiful individual, following your story has both educated me, while still allowing me to be understanding under the circumstances:( this is so heartbreaking. No one deserves this.
Braxton is very proud of you! You are a wonderful mother and your son will always be in your heart. You are a beautiful woman and way stronger then you think. I am so sorry that this happened to your family. I truly believe your sweet baby boy will watch over you and know how awesome his mom is!!
im sorry about your loss mama. i know exactly how you are feeling i lost my son alexander at 7 months in june 2018. i remember when i went back to work it was so hard because people kept asking me questions and stuff i ended up leaving my job because i couldnt bare the pain. but i just want you to know your time will come to have children in the future. i found out on thanksgiving i was pregnant again but with twins! i feel like god knew the pain i had gone thru and just decided to bless me 2× more. ive had the worst anxiety this pregnancy but i really am trying to have faith everything will be okay.
Thanks for making this video!! You are a strong woman and i will pray for you. I was watching a video about perfume and somehow saw your video about you unpacking your bag and tears just flooded. I didn't have a stillbirth but I had to make a hard decision in my life to terminate my pregnancy when I was 4 months pregnant in 2015. I was told my baby had turners syndrome and it was the hardest decision wether to have the baby either way or don't bring her into this world because she's not going to live a normal life. I felt like it was a nightmare also besides my child's father I really didn't have anyone to talk to about it and was really sad. A year later i got pregnant not planning it , and I have a 2year baby girl. 3 children in total. 20 yr old 10 and 2. I think you are very courageous and I am happy and sad that I saw your video because it kinda helps me a lil bit. You seem like such a sweet person and i know your baby would've had the best mom ever. Hugs and lots of 💝
I just wanted to say you’re such a strong and beautiful person. Braxton would be so proud of his mama. He’ll always be your baby boy ❤️ lots of love! ❤️
Im so sorry for what you have been through. If vlogging helps you in your healing process I will continue to watch. Because what you don’t realize is that you are helping others by sharing your story of your beautiful baby boy. God bless you and your family in your healing.
Braxton is so so proud of you. And omg that Elephant painting is absolutely gorgeous! My favorite animal
Hey sweet heart I lost my first child on 08/24/2018... I'm so sorry for your lost to baby Braxton .. I can definitely relate to your feelings and will keep you my prayers .
i almost never comment on videos but i’ve felt the pain of losing a child. i just wanted to say you’re so strong and we’re all rooting for you, your comments are filled with such hope and love for you. when i lost my baby i felt my heart break in a way i never thought it could, the pain never truly goes away but 4 months ago i gave birth to my happy, healthy little girl. nothing will ever erase the pain of losing your first child, but you will love again ❤️
If keep a picture of Braxton saying born still on you desk, you leave all questions up to the person across from you. You won't have to say much, the picture says it all. You love that picture, you love your son. There should be no reason for you not to have a picture of him. I just think that would help. I think some people would see it and might not say anything at all. Maybe only to say I am so sorry for your loss. However this way you don't have to explain. You are doing great.
You got this...
Your not alone were all with you Braxtons Mommy I know the pain n your voice I admire you goin to work I had no1 to talk to didnt have no1 thought I was alone n no1 understand 💚🌻
With pain comes strength...... I am so proud of you for your courage and strength. I had a miscarriage back in 2015 and i cried watching your videos..... Since then i have had my 2 rainbow babies and still wonder what would he or she be like.... Everything will get better soon..... I admire you thank you so much for sharing ..... We love you Braxton......
Sending you all the love mama. Everyday you wake up, you are honoring Braxton by living and keeping his memory alive. It won’t heal over night and everyday will be a struggle, but you have a whole community of support. Never be afraid to reach out mamas. 💕 keep staying strong
You are so open and honest! Remember it’s not your place to make others feel comfortable. You do what feels best for YOU! Love you and you amazing videos
Braxton will always be with so many of us forever because of how you have made us fall in love with him! 💙
I’m so sorry I’ve said a small prayer for you and family. I just can’t understand why this happens is so heartbreaking
My baby sister died 1995, she was diagnosed with hydrocephalus. I was 14 yrs old when she died after 24 hours my Mom gave birth to her. We were devastated.💔 But it is comforting to think, we have an angel up there, who watches over, and pray for us. Your story is relatable. Braxton is your angel. Keep on praying for healing.🙏
Your beautiful
Your strong
And always Braxton’s mama
I know your hurt, all a little to familiar for me.
I pray for you and I pray for us mothers who have this hurt for our lost babies. We will always carry them in our hearts.
I found your channel last night and have watched so many videos and subscribed already. I love you so much as a person and your channel but it's just as heartbreaking also. I can't imagine your pain and the loss of loosing a baby or child. I could never imagine loosing either of my girls at any stage of life. You're such a beautiful Mumma ❤❤
You are a strong lady.
I go back to work today after losing my boy at 22 weeks gestation. One of my good friends gave birth 3 days before I delivered my baby and I’m extremely anxious and angry. Luckily I came across your video. It’s been one month since I found out he wasn’t ok, but this gives me a little courage before I walk through those doors.
I know this is way late. I enjoy watching your videos. I'm happy you had another baby. She is beautiful 😍❤braxton and briza are precious.
I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful son. Although I cannot begin to imagine the hurt you must feel, I am so glad that I found you because watching your videos makes me cherish my beautiful daughters that much more. I just picked up my 5 month old to hold her that much tighter. Continue to be strong for your son, your an amazing mom for honoring his memory as you do!
You are an amazingly brave and courageous woman, Braxton is blessed to have you as a mom.
Felly You are such an amazing young lady!!! My heart breaks for you Doll!!! I admire your strength and sharing your story... I’m praying for you ❤️
Going back to work was hard after my loss and it was inevitable that I ran into people who knew I was pregnant and they would ask about my pregnancy and I would have to tell them what happened. It sucks that then you find yourself consoling them almost and trying to make them feel better. Or some would make ignorant comments that were unintentionally hurtful. You are so brave mama and absolutely Braxton is so proud of you every single day. I'm sure you are his hero💞
Your still mourning your loss is still fresh. Allow yourself to very gradually get back to the old usual you. It might take a full year sometimes less sometimes more. Everyone is different.
I don’t know how you came up on my feed, but I’m glad you did! I totally can’t relate to anything you’re going through but thank you for sharing. You’re so strong!
You and Jonathan are in my prayers and I just want to hug you both. You two are so strong...keep being brave and strong!
I lost my son when I was 40 weeks 2days on 2/15/18. When I went back to work no one asked or talked about my loss and it still hurts even a year later no one reached out to me besides my manager. It was hard also because one of my co workers was pregnant at the same time and her her baby a month before I did. So they would ask her how her daughter was doing in front of me with no care knowing my son had passed away. I'm glad you had support its super hard when you dont have any at all.
I still have the crib, clothing and everything in its place. I'm planning on finally feeling like I want to move his things.
I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that nobody asked or talked about your loss.
When I recorded this video my experience wasn’t too bad, but now that I’ve been back for a longer time, I feel like it’s getting more difficult. My coworker is going through her pregnancy and we have so many clients that come In and talk to her about her baby allllll day long. It’s really hard. I just wish my son was here
I’m so sorry you had this experience. People who find it difficult to deal with your situation need to put themselves in your situation and know that to say something and risk upsetting you is better than saying nothing and still upsetting you and I know this from personal experience. I had people I knew cross the street rather than talk to me. I felt totally isolated as a result of their inadequacy.
People generally feel uncomfortable with death. They probably really do care about your loss but they just might not know how to approach the topic. They might be scared of saying the wrong thing or that bringing up your baby will make you upset.
I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️❤️ my first daughter died 7 years ago 2 days after she was born due to a placenta rupture. Going back to work was sooo hard. Everyday I would come home crying. But everyday it was less each time. I also didn’t get my confidence back until my 4th pregnancy. So many things come with grief and you really don’t know how your emotions will arise. Praying for you and your husband. I promise things will get better. It sounds so cliche but it’s true. 💜💜
I lost my twins July 29th. I had them at 21 weeks due to short cervix, my first pregnancy. I had to push both babies out. My daughter died a few mins after being delivered and my son passed a week later in the nicu. I been heartbroken every since. I pray for your healing and any woman that experience this
I'm so sorry for your loss, I can't put into words how that must feel. I hope soon you'll find faith to keep going forward, not to forget him ever but to keep living for yourself and your husband. You got this!!!! Prayers your way.
You’re so strong mama! I remember going back to work after losing my twins. It’s extremely hard . Be easy on yourself. 💕
I'm currently taking two classes this semester and I am also working. I have to admit it's a struggle, much like you I though things would be so different. I agree with the statement you made about things seeming bland. I'm still grappling with accepting all of the loss that came with losing my Moses. It is also difficult for me to look at pictures of him because the amount of hurt i feel is unbearable. I have a picture of his hands next to his urn in my room and I keep a light on for him at night. Around the time of my loss there were several women who would soon be due. Now those babies are just reminders of age and milestones my son will never know. I try my best to clebrate the holidays with rearranging his area, we just did it for Valentine's day. I dont have to many people to talk to so thank you for allowing me to Express what I'm going through. Felly thank for being a support. I just want to say I'm proud of you and admire your fighting spirit. Thank you for each one of your videos. Moses's mama ❤
Desiree Diaz Desiree Diaz thank you so much for this message ♥️ I also have certain pictures of Braxton that just make me cry every time I see them. There are some photos that the nurses took of him right after I gave birth, and he just looks so small, beautiful and innocent. I just think, “it’s not fair that Braxton never had the opportunity to live his life” I know he was going to be such an amazing boy.
Two weeks after Braxton passed away, one of our neighbors came home with her newborn baby. It was torture. I used to go sit on the rocking chair in Braxton’s nursery and I could just hear her baby crying from there 😔 all I wanted was to hear BRAXTON’S cry ! I’m so thankful that they moved away in December because it would have been really hard to see their baby growing up and knowing that that’s how Braxton would have looked ...
Hugs ♥️♥️♥️
I’m praying for your pain to ease, I tear up almost every time your voice cracks because I can’t imagine the feeling of losing a child. as a teen mom this was my biggest fear because I had a complication towards the end of my pregnancy, I’m very heart broken for you, but I’m praying for your pain to ease and for you to once regain happiness once again, Braxton is always around hes always listening remember he loves you since the moment he was conceived ♥️
Hey I don’t know how I made it to your channel but I’ve watched all your videos when I was younger I seen my mom goes through two miscarriages at about 24 weeks and it’s been the most painful things. I pray you find peace in your heart and just know that Braxton is in heaven waiting for you very anxiously so yes we will all hug our babies that were taken too soon because I’m sure he is up there playing with my little brothers that I very much miss
Sending much love to you
Hello mamma I think of you & your family often . Sending Love&Prayers to you . R.I.P BRAXTON 💙👑✨🦋🧸🙏🏽 Love from Toronto, Canada 🇨🇦. I keep you in my daily prayers. I pray each day u get a bit stronger . You are stronger then you think mamma💙 I love you even tho u don’t know me. You& Braxton touched my heart forever. 🙏🏽💙🙏🏽
I had miscarriage exactly two weeks ago with my 8 week old baby. Before, I never understood the pain of losing a baby even if I knew people that had miscarriages.. Until it happened to me. The pain is unbearable. I still cry almost everyday thinking about that heartbreaking day ever of my life. The emotions after the doctor have told us that my baby doesn’t have a heartbeat anymore was the worst news I have ever heard. Even if we just heard his/her heartbeat on 2 sonogram appointments (a week and a day) before the miscarriage. Me and my fiance were lucky enough to have a good support system. We were allowed to take some time off from work. Families, friends and co-workers constantly checking on us.
I am scheduled to come back to work on Monday and I don’t know what to do or to expect. I don’t know how will I respond to some co-workers if they ask me what exactly happened or how am I coping up etc. I don’t want to breakdown and cry in front of them and feel bad for me. This video is very helpful on how to prepare and compose my self when I go back to work.
I may not exactly felt your pain after your loss with baby Braxton, but I understand how hard it was for you and your family. I admire you for sharing your story and will continue to pray for you.
Our angel babies will be forever in our hearts, watching over us. 👼🏼♥️
I am so very sorry that you have had to endure such pain,loss,,and sorrow. You are strong and be gentle with yourself you can grieve how you need to and how long you need to. Im sure it's hard in just everyday life. You were blessed to have had him even of it was a short time. My heart is breaking for you. But allow yourself time to heal. Again I am so sad for you and praying you find peace.🌻💜
I am trying to live through a similar experience and watching your videos is helping so much. Thank you for helping me get through this 💙
Awe I’m so sorry for you loss my mom had a bad Infection during her pregnancy and was rushed to a emergency c-section and got my little sister out born 1 pound they said she wouldn’t at the time I had another sister and we was slim on money so staying in the hospital (she was in the nicu) was hard it cost 74,000 like the first week of staying there not counting gas money because my dad was a cop so when she was rushed to the hospital he had to drive up to the hospital and going home for stuff etc she will be 3 this year. I am very surprised she lived but she still has a very rough time with being weak and small for her age she’s 2 and looks like she’s 8 months old or something I am very sorry about your loss hope everything goes well in the future 💗
Felly, you are a strong and beautiful woman. I am catching up on your videos and you are to be admired. My heart aches for you. Much love to you, always Braxton's Mom.❤
Don’t worry Braxton is still in your heart he was not ready to become part of the real life world he will be back don’t worry ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Hi felly, these videos I’ve stumbled across today and I’ve learned a lot from your videos, the way you keep his memory alive and what you do for comfort makes me want to do the same. I lose my daughter Ruby 11-4-2013 at 20 weeks, baby peanut 12-1-2014 at 6 weeks and baby bean 14-12-14 also at 6 weeks and although it’s been years it still hurts just as much as the day I lost them😢 thank u so much for the support you show other angel mums and for sharing your story, lots of love x
You are such a strong & Beautiful Mama ❤️ Praying for your healing. I has a miscarriage at 11 weeks & I can't even begin to imagine your pain. Wishing you all the best ❤️ Baby Braxton is watching over you! What a beautiful baby boy ❤️
My heart breaks for you, this will never be easy to deal with through life because you will always have something to remind you of what happened. But you are still a mommy a beautiful mommy and a strong mommy. No words can ever make u feel any better but keep your head up talk to your baby every day he will always be with you. I lost my baby 3 years ago and till this day its still not easy to deal with. And remember its ok to cry and to vent there will always be someone who relates to your situation keep posting your beautiful videos mommy. Much love to you 😙
I wish I had the proper
Words to tell you everything’s going to be okay but it’s really something that will always live with you . After loosing my daughter 9 years ago I can tell you that it’s a pain that never left my heart , I just learned to live with the heartbreak. I believe a piece of me died that September 18 . I will always remember her smell ,her beautiful face, and her adorable smile . My daughter was only 3 months old and died of a terminal brain condition. I carried my daughter for 9months, I was constantly in the hospital refused the abortions the doctors offered me many times saying I could die in the process of birth ,having her ,falling in love with her just to loose her . ??It hurts!until this day it fuckin hurts !but you know what I’m okay ,I’ve lived thru it and you can too ! Give yourself time to heal ! Cry,scream,stay in bed for as long as you need but when you are done get back up and do everything in dedication to your son ! You are not alone . Sending you hugs and wishing you nothing but the best may your angel Rest In Peace ❤️
Wow. You are awesome for what you did. I’m ugly crying reading this. 😘
You are so beautiful 😍 and I know Braxton is proud of you bebe as you are him, there’s a brighter end to this dark tunnel and when you find it to make you stronger I hope you eventually feel betters, never forget but only let it make you stronger. You are so strong and beautiful I can understand why you felt like a robot without him cause your kinda goin through something that hurts so much you can’t enjoy anything else you can’t get depressed tho please stay strong mama he still lookin at you I seen your hummingbird video it made me think Braxton sent those he’s saying hello 👋🏻 and that elephant 🐘 is the cutest try getting a hobby to take your mind off things, when I’m sad I enjoy swimming 🏊♀️ or drawing ✍️ 💓 it’s good to talk about things cause holding them in can make it worse 😭
Everytime I watch one of these videos I just ball my eyes out with you. I don’t know what it’s like to go through what you went through but somehow I feel you pain when you talk about it.. one thing I know forsure is you have one handsome guardian angel. My cousin son passed away when he was 9 months old and they let off balloons with messages on them every year! I’m not sure if you would want to do that but it’s a idea. My prayers are with you and your husband girl. ❣️
Wow !!!! You’re strong momma! 💜so inspiring, Braxton must be so proud ! Hugs !!!!!
Have you looked into Reborn Dolls? You can basically get the looks and feel of sweet baby Braxton in a doll form. I’ve heard they’re really helpful for mothers of stillborns, just to have the feel and the look of your angel.
It's been 7 yes for me and I really don't chat about it. May God bless you and your family. I understand how you feel.
God bless you!!!! Continue to look forward and be happy with whatever happens ❤️❤️
You are strong you are a fighter & god will bless you with much more 💕💕💕
Death sucks. This year though it is only a parent I lost my mom in January. She had her final earthly birthday Jan 1 2019 on a respirator, and died 14 days later. Mom had lost 3 boys before I came along and I was her first born survivor. Now she's also gone. My love and prayers are with you. God bless you and comfort you as He has me. Love from Canada 🇨🇦🦄🐩🌹🏵💐🌸😢👍🤗
BRAXTON IS VERY PROUD OF YOU SISTER LOVE YOU
little Sammy909 love you ♥️♥️♥️
You're truly a beautiful person inside- out, thank you for sharing with us
The hurt in your eyes is truly heartbreaking. I hope that this doesn't come off as insensitive to your loss, but do you think that you will try again? I miscarried my first, I commented about it on your still birth story video. I know it probably doesn't feel like it now, but I can see that you have so much love in your heart and I'm hoping you will try again because your live child will make the pain more bearable. You never forget the loss, but it eases a bit over time. All of our babies are watching over us and we will be reunited one day. A really beautiful concept about death is from Thich Nhat Hanh it's called It's Like A Cloud Up In the Sky.
You are so strong to tell your story, I am sending so much love for you and your family.. 💖
I just came across your channel and I’m so sorry for your loss. I don’t mean to be rude or over stepping or anything like that but I’m curious if you are receiving therapy or going to counseling? A loss is a very traumatic experience and you should get all the time and help you need to grieve. Again I’m not trying to be rude but it helped me so much, I didn’t lose my son but I had him premature and I had a lot of trouble coming to terms with it and I can’t even imagine what your are going through. Lots of love and best wishes to you 💕
I love your videos, hearing about your days. It breaks my heart that God called Braxton home too soon. You are an amazing mother!!!
We all still exist when we leave earth, just in different forms. He still exists! You will see him again one day. And he will send his sibling down to you guys. He left early because his little brother or sister had to come.
My husband and I have been trying almost 7 years. We lost 3 early on around 12 weeks. He knows about 1 of them. No one else but my doctor knows I even want another. When I told people about the 1st one people told me I should be grateful for the one I have like it totally negates the loss. The first one would have been due on my birthday. My husband has none of his own but he raises my 10 year old as his own. I even had people tell me it was God’s way of telling me I couldn’t handle a second child. Well I shouldn’t say people. The only people who knew about the 1st one was my Gram and an aunt so it was those people who made the comments. My husbands friends acted like he dodged a bullet by losing the baby so he never spoke of it again. 2nd one I told no one. Only the doctor who did the test knew. 3rd only a nurse knew. I didn’t tell my husband. Month after month has turned into years. Now I just pretend I’m not much of a kid person when in reality I’ve cried myself to sleep every night for 6+ years.
Keep pushing!! Your doing awesome! You've been through a lot but you'll get back to yourself but it's going to take time.
Your intro is everything I love it soooo much!!!
❤❤you will always be his mommy. You will always always be Braxton's mommy. You are in my thoughts love
Love, you don’t need to accept what happened to Braxton. That is something impossible for a Mother to do. All you can do is learn to live everyday with the pain. The pain won’t be this strong forever, you will be able to think of him without crying and instead smile. Grief is a process. Prayers to you and your family and baby Braxton. ❤️