Great topic, when I was learning I didn't get many or sometimes any dances apart from lineups, so now I offer anyone who makes eye contact regardless of level. I'm usually outnumbered by followers and I remember how it feels starting out so I will dance with as many as I am able.
Great Video Rasa. Speaking as a male lead, I do try to dance with everyone at a social at least once. I don't always do it but I make an effort too, as it's part of my dance philosophy as a more advanced dancer. I have known followers to go with dances at socials, as they where sitting on the side expectantly and not taking the initiative. Being by or on the dance floor is generally the best way to ask for a dance partner, as most people i see after a songs finished ask the next nearest partner to dance.
I do feel guilty when there is a table full of ladies all wanting to dance in my eyeline, it’s up to us all and promoters to get it right so that no one feels left out
In this case I go to the table and ask the girls ,one after the other ,to dance. If one refuses, I immediately go to the next one. I don't want explanations of why she doesn't want to ,but I'll never come back to her again. If they are seven girls and only three agree ,the next time I'll come and ask only those three. the other four would refused, I'll never ask them again
@@pfavayi One reason I found that ladies turn down guys is that in non-Latino dance scenarios, asking a girl to dance means more than just a dance, while in salsa, asking a lady to dance means just that. One of the reasons beginning salsa dancers, especially, will turn down a guy is because they misunderstand the intent. There are also other reasons, most of them beyond my comprehension :) I think teachers should impress upon the students the nature of the interaction. The best dancers I have danced with in my life have been ladies who rarely turned down a dance. As was explained to me by an unnamed teacher, she only turned down a dance if the guy was taking liberties.
Another fantastic video 😊 I like to dance with friends as well as people starting on there dancing journey. Always good to give back as well as having dances with good dancers too. Very goods points 👏 😊
Very nice reminder, Rasa! I will go to a Salsa Miniweekender in 2 weeks time. The people are friendly, the classes are relaxed, the atmosphere is fantastic. Only when it comes to salsa night parties I am a little concerned this year. I missed a lot of classes because of my job and some of my friends leaders will not be there. Your video helped me to take the things as they are, to make the most of the good moments and have later nice memories.
Thank you Rasa for this video today, it's spot on! Some years ago, I discovered Latino dancing whilst working in an eco lodge in Costa Rica. My colleague took me to a bar in the local village between the rain forest and the sea. It was packed! And the drinks and music flowed. It was heaving with families, single people, tourists etc and you know what, everybody spontaneously danced with everybody. What an atmosphere.......I got swept off my feet, literally! Nobody noticed or cared that I had no idea and I danced all night long. I then couldn't wait to get my weekly fix of dancing for 3 months. When I returned to Cornwall and took lessons, it was my mission to 'learn to dance' and yes, I've learned a little. But progress is slow and lack of practice (live, on scene, festivals, congress etc) is so frustrating. I see so many couples who dance all night together, friends who stay in groups, people sat on their phones etc I'm out in Portugal now and it's the same here. It feels very 'clicky' . I have to take responsibiity for being a single, mature women so I often go out alone but I can be a bit shy. But sometimes I bite the bullet and ask for a dance and sometimes, it works out. I had an unpleasant experience in a well know Latinfest a couple of years ago, when I asked a man to dance in the Kizomba room as I had seen him dance with a couple of different women and he was a good dancer. Kizomba is my weakest dance, so I want to improve. Half way through the dance, he said 'I'm tired, sorry I need a rest' and walked off leaving me stood on the dancefloor! I sat down, feeling very deflated and embarrassed. To make things worse, when the next song came on, he was back dancing with a great Kizomba dancer right in front of my eyes! It would be lovely if people (not just men) were more inclusive, encouraging and well, just kind and patient. A little kindness can go a long way. Thank you again for addressing the points you made here. I have been wracking my brain to think of ways to improve the social dance situation. The only thing I have come up with is if someone could start a 'dance taxi' business (especially men, simply because there's often a lack of them) They would be paid to 'do the rounds' at festivals, congress, social evenings etc. I really do think this would be great for everyone. They could pave the way by example, such as seeking out who is looking lost, hopeful, lonel etc. Please someone do it! 🙏
@julieturney1119 Thank you so much for sharing. Your experience is definitely an experience of many. We used to have taxi dancers all the time, some congresses still do but definitely some just saving money 💰.
I am really sad to hear about that, no one should do that it the middle of a song, if done it should be before the dance or after but in the middle and the audacity to dance in front with girl is primitive and low class. I say no but if I say no, I sit a couple songs out usually if the excuse is I'm tried. I'm nice like that. I also feel awkward and embarrassed to dance next to person I refused. Their is a civil and proper way to conduct oneself. But your Wright about kindness, to many ppl took and abused my kindness till none was left. But hearing you and Rasa makes me ponder. So what I have decided now, from today is to re-open my public dancing for everyone new no matter age, weight,looks or level. Does not mean I like to be asked, but if you say hello and have good intentions I will ask you to dance. However anyone from the past, NOTHING will change that is the balance. Come Kiz LDN one day, I remind of them post and personally will dance dance with you ,💯
@@gogokizomba6903 that’s good the post and comments have got you thinking. As Rasa says, if everyone just had that one (or two) dances to be inclusive, it’s not much to ask. Personally, for me, dancing is about connection and celebration of movement and music. I have never refused a request for a dance but that too has been taken advantage of 😂 I guess people have their own agendas, reasons for dancing. But if you look at the origins of dancing, for example, Kizomba and Semba, those dance communities were about connection. Different generations, all shapes and sizes and no evaluation of levels. An experienced dancer only needs to simplify moves to give a newbie a chance to dance. Go in simple, add a bit if they seem like they can handle it etc I’ve danced with men who throw me all over the place even injured me in their attempt to show off their skills. But I keep dancing and hoping that eventually I will reach a level where I can dodge that 😂 Equally, I’ve had dances with thoughtful men and wished the song/dance would never end. Thankyou for your offer, very kind ❤
My main problem with this subject comes down to this: If we lecture or convince someone to ask, not ask, etc. we might get them to change for a little bit, but in the long run we're asking them to leave. It happened to me 3 out of 3 times I want to an event, so I don't go to that event anymore. Because the person doing the lecturing worked for the organization running it, I'm reluctant to go to new events. Particularly events connected to the same organization, which is most events for that dance in my area. We can still help people learn to ask or get asked, if they are interested. We can ask people about what's going on to see if there's anything we can help with. Sometimes our best option is acknowledging this isn't the best event, dance or community for them. Maybe we can point them toward a different event, dance or community that would fit them better.
I agree, lecturing is not good, encouraging and talking about what makes the sceen better is necessary for us to keep it as safe and as friendly as we know it to be 😉. But everybody should be free to do what feels right for them 😉.
As a lead, it's nice to ask every follow to dance, but be prepared for occasional rejections. These may not be personal like they might simply be taking a rest-or they may be due to personal reasons, like feeling you’re not at the same level.
I will dance with everyone and I go out of the way to find women ( followers) who look like they are being left out or on the side. If people asked what I would prefer. I would prefer everyone thought the same way but I know I can't insist on other people doing what I want them to be like. If my effort changed one person view of themselves and the event, it is worth it.
Again, good topic! Dance scene sometimes makes you feel down for the said reasons. I wish all dancers (or entire world) is so well rounded kind human-beings like Rasa . They are just thinking about how good they look and don’t worry about the rest. Are they actually enjoying dancing as they are more obsessed about how good they look and showing off. They are not even smiling😂 Typical social media addicted self centred culture we are living in unfortunately. But I still have a hope as there are people like Rasa that brings up this kind of topics up front! 🙏🫶
I agree. I try to get atleast 1 dance with all the girls i know, and then maybe a few more with the girls i want to talk more with or build connection with
Thank you for understanding the other side. Your comment about paying customer is spot on. I also think your last comment about is the most overlooked yet most important and number 1 reason most guys wont ask many women. I agree we have to try and learn from eachother and find a balance for the growth of the empire. I myself have spent the last 2 Kiz LDN parties 90% on the dancefloor. Have not done that since the Batuke days.
Yeah, there are so many crazy things I hear from my students and friends, I haven't encountered that myself, too, but I am a teacher, slightly different for me 😉🤣.
I would say Im an average non-beginner lead. I try to dance with everyone because I know everyone is there to dance and lots of followers danced with me when I was just starting. In my local community, it is extremely rare for a follower to say straight up "no". If I do get a "no", its because they say they are resting or taking a song off and we can dance later. All that is to say, I sometimes genuinely wish some follows would say no to me. Because the alternative that I have gotten from some more advanced follows is that they dance with me, but give me a very lazy dance where it doesnt seem like they are trying to connect or have fun at all. I mean I usually get the message and never ask them again, but its still pretty frustrating and more emotionally damaging for me than a simple "no".
I think this has a fair bit to do with why I stopped dancing. I’m 47, guys want to dance with either people they already know and have known for ages, or younger better looking women they are attracted to. It gets discouraging after a while. I get tired of doing all the asking, and it’s not great for self esteem.
@@DanceWithRasa I agree it really depends on a place & where you sit, along with your, Self-esteem which is confidence in one's own worth, abilities, or morals. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs about oneself as well as emotional states. As 50 +yr old male lead I know my confidence improves when I receive a positive comment & dips when I know my dance partner didn,t enjoy my attempt at kizomba.
I ask every girl in the club to dance. I never sit down. I dance nearly every song... And I have practical experience of girls saying they never refuse guys yet when I asked them they refuse. Girl say one thing. they do something completely opposite or different....
First of all, if a girl dumps me before the end of the dance to pick the next guy, she will never dance with me again in her life. If I see a girl doing that with another guy, same, I will never dance with her. Now to the main point. I am in two modalities "nice night" and "nasty night". I start as nice, I invite everybody, young and old, experts and beginners. If I start getting "no"s, it becomes a nasty night, and I will only invite hot experts and the girls I know.
it's called enlightened self-interest! A complicated topic on the dance -floor. Obviously women are more defensive, and so many of them won't arrive alone so they don't arrive at all. So yes I will dance, and almost always enjoy, dancing with the woman sitting alone or not getting many dances. There's always something to enjoy. If she says 'No' please don't push it! Otherwise they develop tactics to communicate their displeasure during the dance, which is a real pain if she said 'Yes'. SO how de we accommodate the 90% of women who want to lead? I did not invent the dance,! So many guys dance like a lamp-stand, it's going to look silly when they follow!!!!
Great video as always Rasa. :) Always try to dance with all the people I know, plus dance with at least 2 new people each night at a congress. If miss someone send them a message, that will dance with the lady next time. :) See you soon. Kiss hand, cheek, cheek. Jon
@DanceWithRasa and we all love your wise advice on videos...and your classes are always entertaining and fun. :) Hope to see you soon as only see you on the dance circuit about once a year. :p Kiss hand, cheek, cheek. Jon
leaders being proactive is a good thing, but sometimes those followers that do not get a lot of dances react by asking you more dances and they might get upset if you end up giving them a no, even if you gave them an explanation
The only ones I don’t invite are the follows who snubbed (just saying no is perfectly fine but rather those look down upon) me when i was beginner lead or if i see them doing that to someone else.
Girls are so particular, so choosy, too many details, too many conditions, peer pressure ... it's very difficult for a girl to accept a guy for a dance. When a girl refuses your dance invitation ,she expects you to come back and ask again..... In fact a girl can refuse you four times ,and she will still expect you to come a fifth time to ask you to dance.... We don't ask girls to dance because they refuse....
Great video. I would say no. You don’t have to dance with everyone even as a teacher. You are a human being also with emotions & spirit. And like anyone you will need to take care of your own needs also.
Be realistic... women are far more choosy about the partners they dance with that men are. 99.99% of men never refuse when a girl asks them to dance. 30 to 70, sometimes even 80% of women, will refuse a guy when he asks them to dance.... Meaning live with the constant humiliation of being refused to dance by girls.... When you ask a girl to dance, many of them behave like you are proposing love to them. The first thing on their mind is to refuse you. Women prefer to accept invites from guys who are much better than them on the dance floor. Men have to settle with girls that know much less than they do...
you speak truth, its just men don't speak up about it, you are wright on this one, only the last part I disagree with the last part but I only Dance at Kiz LDN really so I may have a skewered view at present.
Why should I feel obliged to dance with everybody? I dance with the people I like to dance. If you are a teacher or organizer then you should take all the followers to dance, because it is your job everybody to have a good time
Unfortunately you're talking theoretically about what should be or what should not be.... The reality on the ground is very different from what you're saying.... And especially for the men, you have no idea what men go through in a dance club.....
Yes I do , I have a very good idea. That's why I said it is a nice thing to do but not for everyone it's natural, in the end you have to do what you think is right for you 😉.
The number of leads to follow in the Silicon Valley Bay area is roughly 3:1. Yes, ladies, your eyes are not lying. Move here, please :) A few kind women danced with me while I was learning. So, I make it a point to dance with everyone. The ratio is better when I travel out of the area. I make it a point to give back. It also helps me learn to modulate my lead. And make genuine friends.
Great topic, when I was learning I didn't get many or sometimes any dances apart from lineups, so now I offer anyone who makes eye contact regardless of level. I'm usually outnumbered by followers and I remember how it feels starting out so I will dance with as many as I am able.
@@leerobson2382 beautiful 😍
It’s so much more than just learning a lot of dance moves.
@myronblack8197 yes it is 😇
But most people don't know a lot of things moves, so you can't complain against something that you can't do anyway
Great Video Rasa. Speaking as a male lead, I do try to dance with everyone at a social at least once. I don't always do it but I make an effort too, as it's part of my dance philosophy as a more advanced dancer. I have known followers to go with dances at socials, as they where sitting on the side expectantly and not taking the initiative. Being by or on the dance floor is generally the best way to ask for a dance partner, as most people i see after a songs finished ask the next nearest partner to dance.
Well said! Thank you for sharing 😉
I do feel guilty when there is a table full of ladies all wanting to dance in my eyeline, it’s up to us all and promoters to get it right so that no one feels left out
Agree 👍 teachers and promoters should work harder to not have too many women standing our, whenever it's possible 😉.
In this case I go to the table and ask the girls ,one after the other ,to dance.
If one refuses, I immediately go to the next one. I don't want explanations of why she doesn't want to ,but I'll never come back to her again.
If they are seven girls and only three agree ,the next time I'll come and ask only those three. the other four would refused, I'll never ask them again
@@pfavayi I understand that completely 💯
@@pfavayi One reason I found that ladies turn down guys is that in non-Latino dance scenarios, asking a girl to dance means more than just a dance, while in salsa, asking a lady to dance means just that. One of the reasons beginning salsa dancers, especially, will turn down a guy is because they misunderstand the intent. There are also other reasons, most of them beyond my comprehension :)
I think teachers should impress upon the students the nature of the interaction. The best dancers I have danced with in my life have been ladies who rarely turned down a dance. As was explained to me by an unnamed teacher, she only turned down a dance if the guy was taking liberties.
Another fantastic video 😊 I like to dance with friends as well as people starting on there dancing journey. Always good to give back as well as having dances with good dancers too. Very goods points 👏 😊
Love that!🥰
Thanks Rasa, I really like your mentality. You're absolutely right 👍
@@Arnaudbouss 💗💗💗
Very nice reminder, Rasa! I will go to a Salsa Miniweekender in 2 weeks time. The people are friendly, the classes are relaxed, the atmosphere is fantastic. Only when it comes to salsa night parties I am a little concerned this year. I missed a lot of classes because of my job and some of my friends leaders will not be there. Your video helped me to take the things as they are, to make the most of the good moments and have later nice memories.
@florinaisofache3922 I'm so pleased 😀 be brave, take control 🥰.
Thank you Rasa for this video today, it's spot on! Some years ago, I discovered Latino dancing whilst working in an eco lodge in Costa Rica. My colleague took me to a bar in the local village between the rain forest and the sea. It was packed! And the drinks and music flowed. It was heaving with families, single people, tourists etc and you know what, everybody spontaneously danced with everybody. What an atmosphere.......I got swept off my feet, literally! Nobody noticed or cared that I had no idea and I danced all night long. I then couldn't wait to get my weekly fix of dancing for 3 months. When I returned to Cornwall and took lessons, it was my mission to 'learn to dance' and yes, I've learned a little. But progress is slow and lack of practice (live, on scene, festivals, congress etc) is so frustrating. I see so many couples who dance all night together, friends who stay in groups, people sat on their phones etc I'm out in Portugal now and it's the same here. It feels very 'clicky' . I have to take responsibiity for being a single, mature women so I often go out alone but I can be a bit shy. But sometimes I bite the bullet and ask for a dance and sometimes, it works out. I had an unpleasant experience in a well know Latinfest a couple of years ago, when I asked a man to dance in the Kizomba room as I had seen him dance with a couple of different women and he was a good dancer. Kizomba is my weakest dance, so I want to improve. Half way through the dance, he said 'I'm tired, sorry I need a rest' and walked off leaving me stood on the dancefloor! I sat down, feeling very deflated and embarrassed. To make things worse, when the next song came on, he was back dancing with a great Kizomba dancer right in front of my eyes! It would be lovely if people (not just men) were more inclusive, encouraging and well, just kind and patient. A little kindness can go a long way. Thank you again for addressing the points you made here.
I have been wracking my brain to think of ways to improve the social dance situation. The only thing I have come up with is if someone could start a 'dance taxi' business (especially men, simply because there's often a lack of them) They would be paid to 'do the rounds' at festivals, congress, social evenings etc. I really do think this would be great for everyone. They could pave the way by example, such as seeking out who is looking lost, hopeful, lonel etc. Please someone do it! 🙏
@julieturney1119 Thank you so much for sharing. Your experience is definitely an experience of many.
We used to have taxi dancers all the time, some congresses still do but definitely some just saving money 💰.
@@DanceWithRasaIt would be a good investment. More women would have a better experience and keep coming back ❤
@julieturney1119 agreed
I am really sad to hear about that, no one should do that it the middle of a song, if done it should be before the dance or after but in the middle and the audacity to dance in front with girl is primitive and low class.
I say no but if I say no, I sit a couple songs out usually if the excuse is I'm tried. I'm nice like that. I also feel awkward and embarrassed to dance next to person I refused. Their is a civil and proper way to conduct oneself.
But your Wright about kindness, to many ppl took and abused my kindness till none was left. But hearing you and Rasa makes me ponder.
So what I have decided now, from today is to re-open my public dancing for everyone new no matter age, weight,looks or level. Does not mean I like to be asked, but if you say hello and have good intentions I will ask you to dance.
However anyone from the past, NOTHING will change that is the balance.
Come Kiz LDN one day, I remind of them post and personally will dance dance with you ,💯
@@gogokizomba6903 that’s good the post and comments have got you thinking. As Rasa says, if everyone just had that one (or two) dances to be inclusive, it’s not much to ask. Personally, for me, dancing is about connection and celebration of movement and music. I have never refused a request for a dance but that too has been taken advantage of 😂 I guess people have their own agendas, reasons for dancing. But if you look at the origins of dancing, for example, Kizomba and Semba, those dance communities were about connection. Different generations, all shapes and sizes and no evaluation of levels. An experienced dancer only needs to simplify moves to give a newbie a chance to dance. Go in simple, add a bit if they seem like they can handle it etc I’ve danced with men who throw me all over the place even injured me in their attempt to show off their skills. But I keep dancing and hoping that eventually I will reach a level where I can dodge that 😂 Equally, I’ve had dances with thoughtful men and wished the song/dance would never end. Thankyou for your offer, very kind ❤
Thanks Rasa, you are talking sense as usual....
You're most welcome😇
My main problem with this subject comes down to this: If we lecture or convince someone to ask, not ask, etc. we might get them to change for a little bit, but in the long run we're asking them to leave.
It happened to me 3 out of 3 times I want to an event, so I don't go to that event anymore. Because the person doing the lecturing worked for the organization running it, I'm reluctant to go to new events. Particularly events connected to the same organization, which is most events for that dance in my area.
We can still help people learn to ask or get asked, if they are interested. We can ask people about what's going on to see if there's anything we can help with.
Sometimes our best option is acknowledging this isn't the best event, dance or community for them. Maybe we can point them toward a different event, dance or community that would fit them better.
I agree, lecturing is not good, encouraging and talking about what makes the sceen better is necessary for us to keep it as safe and as friendly as we know it to be 😉. But everybody should be free to do what feels right for them 😉.
As a lead, it's nice to ask every follow to dance, but be prepared for occasional rejections. These may not be personal like they might simply be taking a rest-or they may be due to personal reasons, like feeling you’re not at the same level.
Very true 👍
I will dance with everyone and I go out of the way to find women ( followers) who look like they are being left out or on the side. If people asked what I would prefer. I would prefer everyone thought the same way but I know I can't insist on other people doing what I want them to be like. If my effort changed one person view of themselves and the event, it is worth it.
@@marshall886 beautiful way of thinking 😉
Again, good topic! Dance scene sometimes makes you feel down for the said reasons. I wish all dancers (or entire world) is so well rounded kind human-beings like Rasa . They are just thinking about how good they look and don’t worry about the rest. Are they actually enjoying dancing as they are more obsessed about how good they look and showing off. They are not even smiling😂
Typical social media addicted self centred culture we are living in unfortunately. But I still have a hope as there are people like Rasa that brings up this kind of topics up front! 🙏🫶
@mt2599 I know quite few people like me , so I have hope too 😇
I agree. I try to get atleast 1 dance with all the girls i know, and then maybe a few more with the girls i want to talk more with or build connection with
That makes perfect sense 😉😇.
Thank you for understanding the other side. Your comment about paying customer is spot on.
I also think your last comment about is the most overlooked yet most important and number 1 reason most guys wont ask many women.
I agree we have to try and learn from eachother and find a balance for the growth of the empire.
I myself have spent the last 2 Kiz LDN parties 90% on the dancefloor. Have not done that since the Batuke days.
@@gogokizomba6903 😉💯💯
Thank you, Rasa, for a great talk - very encouraging 💙
Glad you enjoyed it!😇
😅I have yet to encounter that experience of some one leaving the dance to move to the next person but that would blow my mind away if that happened.
Yeah, there are so many crazy things I hear from my students and friends, I haven't encountered that myself, too, but I am a teacher, slightly different for me 😉🤣.
Love this … spot on from all perspectives ❤
Thank you!😇
I would say Im an average non-beginner lead. I try to dance with everyone because I know everyone is there to dance and lots of followers danced with me when I was just starting.
In my local community, it is extremely rare for a follower to say straight up "no". If I do get a "no", its because they say they are resting or taking a song off and we can dance later.
All that is to say, I sometimes genuinely wish some follows would say no to me. Because the alternative that I have gotten from some more advanced follows is that they dance with me, but give me a very lazy dance where it doesnt seem like they are trying to connect or have fun at all. I mean I usually get the message and never ask them again, but its still pretty frustrating and more emotionally damaging for me than a simple "no".
@@orpheos9 that's a very fair comment 👏
I think this has a fair bit to do with why I stopped dancing. I’m 47, guys want to dance with either people they already know and have known for ages, or younger better looking women they are attracted to. It gets discouraging after a while. I get tired of doing all the asking, and it’s not great for self esteem.
I really think it really depends on a place, there's loads of places where everyone dances with everyone. You should definitely not stop dancing 😉.
@@DanceWithRasa I agree it really depends on a place & where you sit, along with your, Self-esteem which is confidence in one's own worth, abilities, or morals. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs about oneself as well as emotional states.
As 50 +yr old male lead I know my confidence improves when I receive a positive comment & dips when I know my dance partner didn,t enjoy my attempt at kizomba.
@iankissmyaxe5683 🤗🤗🤗
This thing can be better, but never perfect. Solo dancing and group dancing are solid solutions.
👍👍
I ask every girl in the club to dance. I never sit down. I dance nearly every song...
And I have practical experience of girls saying they never refuse guys yet when I asked them they refuse.
Girl say one thing. they do something completely opposite or different....
@@pfavayi amazing the way you make our community better ❤️
Thank you❤
@@juratepetrikauskiene9908 🥰🥰🥰
First of all, if a girl dumps me before the end of the dance to pick the next guy, she will never dance with me again in her life. If I see a girl doing that with another guy, same, I will never dance with her.
Now to the main point. I am in two modalities "nice night" and "nasty night". I start as nice, I invite everybody, young and old, experts and beginners. If I start getting "no"s, it becomes a nasty night, and I will only invite hot experts and the girls I know.
Makes sence to me 😉.
it's called enlightened self-interest!
A complicated topic on the dance -floor. Obviously women are more defensive, and so many of them won't arrive alone so they don't arrive at all. So yes I will dance, and almost always enjoy, dancing with the woman sitting alone or not getting many dances. There's always something to enjoy.
If she says 'No' please don't push it! Otherwise they develop tactics to communicate their displeasure during the dance, which is a real pain if she said 'Yes'.
SO how de we accommodate the 90% of women who want to lead? I did not invent the dance,! So many guys dance like a lamp-stand, it's going to look silly when they follow!!!!
Thank you for your input 😉☺️
Great video as always Rasa. :) Always try to dance with all the people I know, plus dance with at least 2 new people each night at a congress. If miss someone send them a message, that will dance with the lady next time. :) See you soon. Kiss hand, cheek, cheek. Jon
Love that!😇😇😇
@DanceWithRasa and we all love your wise advice on videos...and your classes are always entertaining and fun. :) Hope to see you soon as only see you on the dance circuit about once a year. :p Kiss hand, cheek, cheek. Jon
@jonshawunited time goes very quickly 😇😇😇
leaders being proactive is a good thing, but sometimes those followers that do not get a lot of dances react by asking you more dances and they might get upset if you end up giving them a no, even if you gave them an explanation
That is very true. Women need to understand that the guys do not owe you a dance. We just hope that they will see the value of being proactive 😇..
So there's no chance of escaping you tonight Rasa! 😉🤣😘 x
@@MissConJeezyality 🤣🤣🤣no way
The only ones I don’t invite are the follows who snubbed (just saying no is perfectly fine but rather those look down upon) me when i was beginner lead or if i see them doing that to someone else.
That I'd absolutely valid 😉🫡
Girls are so particular, so choosy, too many details, too many conditions, peer pressure ... it's very difficult for a girl to accept a guy for a dance.
When a girl refuses your dance invitation ,she expects you to come back and ask again.....
In fact a girl can refuse you four times ,and she will still expect you to come a fifth time to ask you to dance....
We don't ask girls to dance because they refuse....
I understand, and women should think about that 😉.
So help me understand how I'm supposed to feel if my spouse is dancing with everyone but me
Erm , that seems like you should ask her. Communication is the key 😉.
Great video. I would say no. You don’t have to dance with everyone even as a teacher. You are a human being also with emotions & spirit. And like anyone you will need to take care of your own needs also.
True 💝
Be realistic... women are far more choosy about the partners they dance with that men are.
99.99% of men never refuse when a girl asks them to dance.
30 to 70, sometimes even 80% of women, will refuse a guy when he asks them to dance....
Meaning live with the constant humiliation of being refused to dance by girls....
When you ask a girl to dance, many of them behave like you are proposing love to them.
The first thing on their mind is to refuse you.
Women prefer to accept invites from guys who are much better than them on the dance floor.
Men have to settle with girls that know much less than they do...
you speak truth, its just men don't speak up about it, you are wright on this one, only the last part I disagree with the last part but I only Dance at Kiz LDN really so I may have a skewered view at present.
There are many different sides to it. Do not focus on those who are negative focus on those who really happy to dance with anyone 😉.
There's good and bad everywhere, I focus to focus on what makes things better not worse 😇
Why should I feel obliged to dance with everybody? I dance with the people I like to dance. If you are a teacher or organizer then you should take all the followers to dance, because it is your job everybody to have a good time
That's true 👍. You are definitely not obliged, just a nice thing to do.. also builds a more friendly sceen 😇.
Unfortunately you're talking theoretically about what should be or what should not be....
The reality on the ground is very different from what you're saying....
And especially for the men, you have no idea what men go through in a dance club.....
Yes I do , I have a very good idea. That's why I said it is a nice thing to do but not for everyone it's natural, in the end you have to do what you think is right for you 😉.
The number of leads to follow in the Silicon Valley Bay area is roughly 3:1. Yes, ladies, your eyes are not lying. Move here, please :) A few kind women danced with me while I was learning. So, I make it a point to dance with everyone. The ratio is better when I travel out of the area. I make it a point to give back. It also helps me learn to modulate my lead. And make genuine friends.
@@rajeshkanungo6627 wonderful 😉