In my opinion, he is depressed. He has put himself in a life situation which is incompatible with his nature. If he chooses to stay in the situation, he MUST learn some techniques and find activities that will inspire and energize himself. One way is to create. For instance, art, woodworking, gardening, etc., whatever appeals to him and still supports his introverted tendencies. Also, he might pursue groups of like - minded people. He needs his life energy back. Great love to you man! ❤️
He’s CLEARLY hurting...SO MUCH. You can tell by how his voice shakes as soon as he begins to speak. It breaks my heart I know how he feels My body is tired as well. I will forever pray for this man and I do not even know him. “This does not feel like my life....” --😪💔
Really??? Would you like to switch lives with someone else if you're given a choice? Someone who is in a much dire situation, part of the marginalized sector of society, frequently rejected... would you like that? You're listening to Eckhart (and Kim) and it seems you're not understanding what they're saying.
Has anyone else considered that maybe it's this system of slavery with its myriad of rules, expectations and responsibilities that's causing most of our stress?
Adult male with student loans working a low paid job supporting a partner with 2 kids (not his) , is not a easy peaceful journey. Accepting the decisions he has made of what is apart of his journey will give some comfort. He clearly has alot of challanges, accepting the challanges is only repreive he will have for this stage of his life. He has chosen a hard path to live.
Dude! I identify with you so much, your personality so much like mine. I am so overly sensative, sometimes it feels impossible to try to live in a world that does not understand how exhausting it is just to get your "requirements" done for the day. Kim has a little more of a harsh personality than Eckhart but her advise is good. It all comes down to being in the right here, right now... with the realization that things are not always going the be the way I want them to be... and that is ok.
This is the reality that nearly everyone is expereriencing now and life often places us in situations where our perception and capacity to cope can make such an immense difference in our life and the lives of others. We need awakening, consciousness, presence more than ever now. Listening to this, I recognize that perhaps my parents were similarly overwhelmed and unable to cope with their inner state- the fear, anxiety, the anguish they felt when they often ignored and isolated me, kept a distance and did other things. Unfortunately, their way of managing their inner life made me feel unloved, unaccepted and insignificant my entire life and it is only now that I am learning to love myself. Our internal struggles often impact others, and through generations we are perpetuating the same negative core beliefs, similar cycles of lack of compassion to ourselves and others.
OMG! Feeling so much his pain. And i so understand him being myself solitary and not liking small talks 😪😪 Peace and recovery but get out of that relationship! ❤❤❤
Relate to this man in so many ways. USA has become low quality of life unless we stay conscious of every dollar, boundary, choice of time and consumption and thoughts. If he is HSP or empath he needs a tribe and specific strategies.
I love him and understand him so much. He is too much in mind, and aren't we all. We need to feel presence and stay there but easier said than done. All the best to him and understanding who he really is, confidence that he is all he needs, value in himself ❤️
Kim clearly tried to help him, however she probably did not want to go into the rabbit hole (his childhood, life story etc.) and chose to focus on awareness and presence, but he unconsciously wanted Kim to go there with him and Kim chose not, this created a resistance/back and forth/ which made this video slightly tedious but useful for future reference. The gentleman in question just needs to interpret his feelings and emotions better so that others can help him (Mindful meditation can help with this). There is a connection between his upbringing and the people he grew up with and the current people in his life, he is going in circles, he has to make the familiar unfamiliar, let go of the resistance so that he can see where he needs to go and what to do. He clearly is not happy in the relationship he is in, the part time job is just a distraction, he has talents that he can pursue but won't do it because of many things..., however he needs to understand why he attracted the woman and the children that he is looking after atm, maybe the children's painbody or feelings reminds him of his painbody/childhood/guilt, he said he feels annoyed, painbody is annoying, he needs to address the elephant in the room, which is, why is he not looking after his own children/what is missing in his life to make that happen/ is he feeling that he is not enough/not deserving..so many questions... i feel like he has a lot to offer due to his kind and good nature, therefore he needs to find a way to channel this energy and make his presence felt to be a powerful and positive force of nature and have the wife and children that he really wants... he will be alright in the end!
Oh my God the problem is so obvious. He wants to leave his girlfriend but thinks it would make him feel bad, feel alone, make him a bad man. He either needs to change the situation now or accept the now.
I hear everything she’s saying. It’s the fear of breaking falling apart which is the overwhelming part. Hence why she tells him to just fall apart. If he falls apart then what’s there to be scared of anymore. Funny thing is, we can’t truly fall apart. Tools we can use to manage are good. But ultimately it’s surrendering what we think the worst thing can happen might be then coming out the other side and realising we are still here and still whole. It can be scary stuff but necessary. Observe yourself and know your true self ❤️❤️❤️
He doesn't accept himself.. he is rejecting himself in the presence of others. He is rejecting who is he by assuming in his interactions with other people that what he has to say is not interesting, i.e. that there isn't a place for him. He is also by virtue of not accepting himself in the situation, is judging and rejecting those who enjoy small talk (which is ego.. I like this but they don't like this... I am right- they are wrong, superior inferior), so he's critical of those around him including the children in his life. By virtue of his failure to exercise love and compassion in the direction of others and their preferences whether they differ or not from his; he is further creating a cycle of self hatred (discordance with the true self, and increasing resistance). Also I agree with you in the sense that his home environment is not consistent with who he is, and it is very well possible he's not in the right relationship.. and that seemed to manifest in what he said.... which is that he doesn't want to be alone. Because he's not accepting of himself, and is afraid of being alone, he is possibly settling in a relationship that's uncomfortable for him. The fact that he wants to be alone but is afraid is also not an act of self love.
This was me . I like being alone like an introvert, but when I was truly alone I wanted people around . That’s where the conflict within drives you insane . He truly doesn’t love himself . He wants conditional acceptance . His ego is in the way and he can’t see it . She points out his flaws and he is deflecting . Good watch for me , personally because I too have a hard time loving myself . Farewell to each of you struggling. Power of Now by Eckhart, chapter 7 is the key to enlightenment.
It's easy to get caught up in his story because we all have stories like this. At first, I found myself critical of Kim (projecting my own story, my own pain and burdens), but she really did cut through to the heart of the solution: being present... and sans codependency. oxoxox
He's a powerful empath, picking up on others energies. This makes it difficult for him to see truth in himself. Drop everything be willing to die for freedom, this will reveal truth.
I enjoyed her analysis of the situation. Introverts are usually complex people. They are torn by the hardships that their nature presents as well as an urge to protect their fragile ego by blaming others. Although being an introvert is usually a deeper thinker and more sensitive,it takes a toll on other aspects of life making it difficult to accept others even though it goes against their grain. I should know because I am one😒
This is about “ thought “, we have so identify us as our thoughts, we don’t see it’s a thought. We think it’s us. Once thought is seen it just doesn’t have the power to overwhelm us. It was with Tolle I finally saw my thoughts. I still identify as if it was me, but a lot less. Thoughts and be in part feeling, picture in mind eye, story and a repetitive thought. In this moment when we are truly in now, none of this comes up. This is an excellent demonstration of the internal conversation.
she is so beautiful and naturally sees into his soul. the same way you and see a bird or the color blue and we dont have to tell our brains what it is. effortlessly open. he is clearly very chaotic underneath his seemingly calm exterior
He seems so uncomfortable and shy, I don't think I could express myself openly in such a situation like that, surrounded by people and so exposed, my voice would shake too.
At least he's open and honest and addressing this. So many generations - well obviously in unconsciousness - never listened to their body or admitted anything - and took their pain out on others. I understand in many ways how he feels. And yet addressing and observing it.
He is probably n INFP overwhelmed with premature judgements of people around him. He pretty well accepts himself but feels bad around people who superficially judge others. It´s a pretty unbearable situation for him. I like Kim´s advice of connecting to the 'higher self' in such moment, to "fall appart". There lies they key in my opinion to better deal with the situation and listen to the real self to know what to do. To know if it´s worth a try to 'change' people, or to withdraw from the wishy-washy situation to do something important, like resting, or expressing the self creatively. It´s hard to bother with people who aren´t even aware that they are acting judgemental and shallow. He is clearly aware of it, perceiving it and feeling it with full effect; a feeling of wasted time, burning ressources, in himself as well in the people who talk small most of the time. There is so much more than TV-show-topics, slandering, judging or simulating sympathy. He is an intuitive empath, completely seeing through this people. He wants to stop this terrible, loud, obtrusive situation of people being so immensely egoisticly speaking from their egos. I bet this is exactely how he experiences it. He gets drawn into his ego around such situations. He gets drained by feeling obligated to his partner and kids, he wants to take part in such meeting with her friends out of love for her. He makes himself ill this way if he not sets clear boundaries for himself and talks clear about this with his partner. He either completely needs to avoid these particular friends of her, or he needs to ground them for the sake of compability with him (which btw. would be helpful for their other social contacts as well..) - like for example introducing Eckhart and Kim to these people. If these people would not judgementaly laugh, then there is hope for them. :D Well, yes, or he needs to follow Kim´s advice and just enjoy himself, no matter that these people will judge him for sitting there without taking part of their shallow stuff. If he is lucky, he will have some moments when tey are touching some topics with a deeper meaning, there he can shine and actually bring something of value to the table; even if this might be rare amongst this round, he will feel happy and gain some energy back. Puh.. a bunch of text I wrote. I know it is judgemental of shallow judgemental people, but I see authenticity and moral as a higher value than talking about random shit with no other sense than feeding ego. I wish everyone would be more like him, then he would feel way better than he did at the time of this recording. Hope he made it well. Peace ;)
Feeeeeels being an infj and have close to being P back and forth on test. New to eckhart tolle videos also ❤💜💚 for couple months but so getting better but somehow this video came at a great time I needed
Yes, Eckhart Tolle is toll. :) That´s asign of synchronicity that this video came at the right time, here it came at the right time too. INFP and INFJ are easily confused.. If you more often have a lot of ideas to a topic and can´t decide for one of them, you are probably a P, whereas when you have a certain knowing and feel that this one is the right one you are more likely a J. I am speaking about the extraverted and introverted variants of Intuition here. Ne is faster and more vast, whereas Ni is slower but more precise. One made an analogy: Ni is like a Sniper and Ne like a Shotgun. ;)
If you’re an introvert that doesn’t like to be irritated by loud, shallow, unconscious human beings, I suggest to immerse yourself in the presence of those beings and to just observe and withhold judgement. Smile, laugh, and enjoy the show.
The relationship and her children are not compatible with who he is. He stays because he’s afraid of being alone and then resents them because he feels trapped in a situation that isn’t in line with who he truly is.
My goodness. ..so obvious what was making this man tired...Maybe because I make myself tired through worry and not resting properly/completely. ....but he was so resistant to what Kim was saying especially about not liking himself. I hope he got what she was saying....got it physically within his body mind not just understanding it mentally. Half an hour with Kim...wow.
tell me the obious part about it, please? It's easy to point with words, but the reality of it is something completely different, and if you never fell into that pit, you'd never understand. Worst of all is the bad habit that he developed throughout life, because there was nobody with a bit of intelligence to notice and guide him the right way while he was young. It's pretty hard to be present when you are overwhelmed, because you must recover before you start enjoying life again. And while he's overwhelmed, his habits keep him there. Good thing he went to the retreat, but that might be simply not enough.
This guy "seems" sad within....And IMO it "seems" like (from the info he has provided) that his partner is not helping, which is even sadder.....Hopefully this platform has assisted him in bettering his situation on some level.....(My heart goes out to him💐)
What I'm sensing is that I can feel that he really wants to let go but on his terms.. I feel that he attempting to control his "letting go".. on his terms.. but because he hasn't accepted the outer world with authentic Self love.. which he thinks he has.. he actually can't let go.. he needs to practice self love and acceptance rather than putting his energy into letting go.. you can't let go if you haven't loved and accepted..
It is his relationships that are stressing him. He is more solitary and his close ones are shallow. They dont like his isolation and he doesn't like their shallowness. He is in fear of not being acceptable in his family. THats stressful. There must be a compromise. a plan. or he will lose this relationship.
He was in genuine pain. I don't understand her irritation at this. I don't feel she understood him and was using her irritation to respond. Normally she's not like this, not in other videos I've seen. I don't feel she was on point for this man, it's unfortunate. I really hope he got the help he needed to move through. X
Oh jeez I'm gonna get flack for this. But he is stressed out on Sunday thiking about having to work and pay for two kids that are not his own. I was a step mom and I am a mom of 4 they are HARD!! and graditude is sparse.
Nothing replaces health, I'm actually beginning to think this philosophy is dangerous. I like Kim & these techniques may be useful but nothing replaces direct action to avert stress & taking rest, nattering kids are no excuse 😮
He should start by noticing the urge to get away from people/ children. Then act on it if needed. But start with that awareness, then once you practice it, bring the wall of resistance down by staying there and let it go through you.
agree, though sometimes it can be too overwhelming for the nervous system and there is indeed a need to get away, rest and recharge in private. No need to force anything, not even awareness, if it is doesn't feel right at a certain moment.
I’m grateful for coming across this.. I relate to this man. I lived in a paradox, where I “accept others as they are” but was changing myself to become more accepted... interesting. Unfortunately, I live in the US and being African American has been a problem for a lot of us. But thanks the Kim, I realized not everyone thinks the same as the collective.
He probably has anxiety and depression. And seems like he may have low self-confidence. I'll bet he feels other peoples discomfort around him and it worsens his self-esteem. I wonder what his typical diet and lifestyle is like. He should implement a totally holistic diet and lifestyle approach through organic detox and nutrition. Lots of people experience emotional disorders due to toxic overload, malnutrition and heightened stress. Also, MEDITATE. Another thing... I wonder if his family dynamic right now isn't serving his greater purpose. Maybe he could find a new scene if he isn't too involved with his relationship. But that's all on him.
Being at the present moment is great. Wonder if that's all we live for? How do we use the present moment to answer the questions of " who am I, where am I and why I am here (on this earth)"?
I think he do not know what love is, unconditional love! Because then he would start making choices which brings him out of the stress without hurting others.
Sometimes it's appropriate to suggest good old fashioned therapy! Ongoing therapy would help this young man...a lot. ( I only suggest therapists who have 20 years experience)
i've been indulging in my thoughts and painbody for the last few months and this video is perfectly timed. Time to come back to the present and let my real self stretch his legs lol
You can take Bach Flower Remedy Olive or Hornbeam for fatigue. There’s others also from FES flower essence services from North America, Australian Bush Flower Essences also do some for tiredness. 🌺
This is a great video. Such a clear explanation of how present moment awareness can help one deal with the stresses of everyday life. To the extent where one can limit the stress and still remain peaceful when faced with challenging situations xxxx
something practical too, that he could have done, is to use ammunition until that habitual sunday moment gets loosened somewhat from it's vortex. To meet that (usually) dreaded moment is so painful.. so trick it.. don't be in your usual spot when it comes. Make sure you have some support figured out for that time this coming sunday..some kind of variation.. at least at first; a friend, an activity, a restaurant.. an errand that isn't monotonous.. some way you can whip up some enthusiastic energy around that time to launch from.. and see a different panorama..or perspective.
If he's depressed, this won't work. He will recharge a bit, but it won't be enough. Some people need support from medicines, especially when they spiral down. They also need more options which a psychotherapist can help generate. Like she said, it may take weeks, months. How's he going to get through that?
Thank you so much for this! I found myself reflecting throughout watching this video. I see now how I've forgotten the importance of just being still and accepting the present moment. I've been practicing self affirmations through meditation, and been allowing myself to feel that I have obtained what I want to bring to fruition. But I do know I have a habit of always thinking and over analyzing past events that have brought me discomfort. I want to understand things that have happened so that they don't arise again. But in turn I keep jumping between past and future, and when presence happens it's through my body communicating to me that I'm not feeling well. Which ends up bringing me more stress and anxiety. Through this video I now have the awareness that I need to practice being still and present more often.
You don't need to practice anything. Just notice what is already here. Making it into "a practice" is another strategy by the restless mind to avoid being here, to introduce time into the picture. You don't need "a practice" in order to notice what is happening right now in you and around you. It is immediate, it is right now, it is real, it is the reality (beyond the word 'reality'), the actuality of this moment. You don't need "a practice" in order to notice that you are not paying attention to something. You just notice. It won't be seen in the future while you are "practicing", it is here now. THIS IS ALL THERE IS. For example, whatever is here now (or at any other moment), you can go (with the attention) to that place. To really feel into that place, not the concept of that place but the actuality of it, the reality of it, the rawness of it.. just the feeling itself, without any labels on it and without any expectations or demands on it. Just deeply allowing that fear/irritation/anger/sadness.. being with it, allowing it to be here, being the container for it that holds it and allows it unfold and express itself (in whatever form). No need to do anything to it, to try to fix it, or to change it, or to try and get rid of it, but just hold it with love and allow it to be here and give it all your attention. That's all. It will move or change or morph or disappear on it own once it feels that it was fully received and heard without judgement. It's kind of a paradox, the moment the feeling knows that it is allowed to be here fully without reservations and that it is loved fully, at that moment it doesn't feel the need to be here anymore.. You don't need to do anything, just allow it to be here and listen to it with full attention and without judgement.
Marianne Williamson did not write Course in Miracles. She interpreted it and conducted lectures & classes. Course in Miracles was written by Helen Schucman.
Wow. Up to now I've never watched anything of Kim. Such a beautiful vessel. The mechanics of the conflicted mind are softly encoded. Such seeing goes far beyond analysis. During listening the energy flows in such comfortable, soothing way that one sees and feels simultaneously. Wonderful contribution. Thank you.
It's important for these 'older' Souls to not become too out of touch with the suffering of the lower worlds and their inhabitants. So...awkward scenarios do indeed tend to arise.
Wouah thanks you, I am feeling so inspired by this talk and exploration. I am also a guy who is a lot in my thougts and awareness of my body helps me a lot to relax and to let go of overthinking and slowing down... :)
Look into Human Design Reflectors my friend. You may be part of the 1% of population who has a combination of being highly sensitive and completely open. I am a Reflector and share the same experience you describe. It is not the situation of partner, job, and kids. I have found I can leave any situation but not the condition. New day, new circumstances same challenge. In any case you are handling yourself better than most. Being a HSP can be especially challenging for men. Many HSP turn to drugs and alcohol to cope.
He's definitely struggling with a few things... sometimes things all roll into one making a bigger whole. I know he talked about endocrine issues but before he said that, I felt like he has adrenal fatigue for one.. Also sounds like some depression ( but being tired and frazzled all the time from adrenal fatigue can definitely make it feel like depression ).. I am also an HSP so when he said that it made a lot of sense too. Being and HSP can also lead to feelings of burn out.. I totally feel for him. It doesn't feel good at all to be stuck in those frazzled, tired, ( what I call hit by a truck tired feelings ) and feeling like you want to do more but just can't. Hopefully he can see a good endocronolgist and get some of his stats in order whatever that turns out to be. I hope he gets back to feeling good again ! I really feel for him, trying to do is best.
I so agree with maddannyWest he is having resistance to what is which is the kids and whatever happens around him like his wife's friends we have to accept what is surrender to life there's peace then!
When he asks the question @ 30:00 something tells me he has not accepted what was just given to him. Hopefully he wakes up soon otherwise he will continue to be in the state in which he is in
Wow really great talk of this kim. Never seen her before just eckhart. She has great stuff too. But not like she wrote power of now... Lol but she had great points at 7:30. 10:30. 15:50. 27:50. 29:50.
I feel overwhelmed by constantly trying to live up to spiritual ideas communicated by others.... These 'signposts' only have meaning when they are realised. Then who needs them then anyway??
He could move to the Netherlands, life much easier here, fuck student debt. Move elsewhere and never return. Beautiful man, please build a life elsewhere. Usa in many places is harsh and unsafe
I find it wrong that she recommends him to break down Also, detachment is just an avoidance technique. He be better suited to allow himself to feel his feelings. And reduce his emotional buildups. This is using the approach of Vivian Dittmar here. But suppose, he realises he aint be able to have the kids around, and decides to leave his partner, so what if he becomes a happier human henceby?
I found this to be a rather clueless analysis of someone who is obviously very stressed about his job his finances and his not coping and his partner is not handling this and is putting pressure on him not to fall apart. And if he falls apart he will probably lose his job and he won't be able to pay his loans and assist his partner. Simply he's not coping with real difficult financial problems. He is probably depressed.
Yes this might be true. He definitely needs to find peace and a clear head to get the right inspirations and opportunities to cope and solve his situation.
In my opinion, he is depressed. He has put himself in a life situation which is incompatible with his nature. If he chooses to stay in the situation, he MUST learn some techniques and find activities that will inspire and energize himself. One way is to create. For instance, art, woodworking, gardening, etc., whatever appeals to him and still supports his introverted tendencies. Also, he might pursue groups of like - minded people. He needs his life energy back. Great love to you man! ❤️
He’s CLEARLY hurting...SO MUCH.
You can tell by how his voice shakes as soon as he begins to speak.
It breaks my heart
I know how he feels
My body is tired as well.
I will forever pray for this man and I do not even know him.
“This does not feel like my life....”
--😪💔
I know he is really broken. Bless you. 💜
Yes he is in pain. But he will be wise to remember. To wander the vision quest is to become one with it.
Really??? Would you like to switch lives with someone else if you're given a choice? Someone who is in a much dire situation, part of the marginalized sector of society, frequently rejected... would you like that?
You're listening to Eckhart (and Kim) and it seems you're not understanding what they're saying.
Physical exhaustion can be a byproduct of mental exhaustion.
Has anyone else considered that maybe it's this system of slavery with its myriad of rules, expectations and responsibilities that's causing most of our stress?
Most of the slaves don't know an alternative. And most of those that do, aren't willing to take one.
I certainly feel this way - seeking an alternative to move aling.
I’m a carbon copy of this man. Everything he says I relate to so much.
Adult male with student loans working a low paid job supporting a partner with 2 kids (not his) , is not a easy peaceful journey. Accepting the decisions he has made of what is apart of his journey will give some comfort. He clearly has alot of challanges, accepting the challanges is only repreive he will have for this stage of his life. He has chosen a hard path to live.
She has a beautiful way of not being in judgement and really hearing what’s behind all the words. 🙏🏼😊
Dude! I identify with you so much, your personality so much like mine. I am so overly sensative, sometimes it feels impossible to try to live in a world that does not understand how exhausting it is just to get your "requirements" done for the day. Kim has a little more of a harsh personality than Eckhart but her advise is good. It all comes down to being in the right here, right now... with the realization that things are not always going the be the way I want them to be... and that is ok.
I've been feeling really stressed out and bad lately, always feels good coming back to Eckhart and Kim and their teachings
This is the reality that nearly everyone is expereriencing now and life often places us in situations where our perception and capacity to cope can make such an immense difference in our life and the lives of others. We need awakening, consciousness, presence more than ever now. Listening to this, I recognize that perhaps my parents were similarly overwhelmed and unable to cope with their inner state- the fear, anxiety, the anguish they felt when they often ignored and isolated me, kept a distance and did other things. Unfortunately, their way of managing their inner life made me feel unloved, unaccepted and insignificant my entire life and it is only now that I am learning to love myself. Our internal struggles often impact others, and through generations we are perpetuating the same negative core beliefs, similar cycles of lack of compassion to ourselves and others.
OMG! Feeling so much his pain. And i so understand him being myself solitary and not liking small talks 😪😪
Peace and recovery but get out of that relationship! ❤❤❤
Relate to this man in so many ways. USA has become low quality of life unless we stay conscious of every dollar, boundary, choice of time and consumption and thoughts. If he is HSP or empath he needs a tribe and specific strategies.
I love him and understand him so much. He is too much in mind, and aren't we all. We need to feel presence and stay there but easier said than done. All the best to him and understanding who he really is, confidence that he is all he needs, value in himself ❤️
Kim clearly tried to help him, however she probably did not want to go into the rabbit hole (his childhood, life story etc.) and chose to focus on awareness and presence, but he unconsciously wanted Kim to go there with him and Kim chose not, this created a resistance/back and forth/ which made this video slightly tedious but useful for future reference. The gentleman in question just needs to interpret his feelings and emotions better so that others can help him (Mindful meditation can help with this). There is a connection between his upbringing and the people he grew up with and the current people in his life, he is going in circles, he has to make the familiar unfamiliar, let go of the resistance so that he can see where he needs to go and what to do. He clearly is not happy in the relationship he is in, the part time job is just a distraction, he has talents that he can pursue but won't do it because of many things..., however he needs to understand why he attracted the woman and the children that he is looking after atm, maybe the children's painbody or feelings reminds him of his painbody/childhood/guilt, he said he feels annoyed, painbody is annoying, he needs to address the elephant in the room, which is, why is he not looking after his own children/what is missing in his life to make that happen/ is he feeling that he is not enough/not deserving..so many questions... i feel like he has a lot to offer due to his kind and good nature, therefore he needs to find a way to channel this energy and make his presence felt to be a powerful and positive force of nature and have the wife and children that he really wants... he will be alright in the end!
Oh my God the problem is so obvious. He wants to leave his girlfriend but thinks it would make him feel bad, feel alone, make him a bad man. He either needs to change the situation now or accept the now.
I hear everything she’s saying. It’s the fear of breaking falling apart which is the overwhelming part. Hence why she tells him to just fall apart. If he falls apart then what’s there to be scared of anymore. Funny thing is, we can’t truly fall apart. Tools we can use to manage are good. But ultimately it’s surrendering what we think the worst thing can happen might be then coming out the other side and realising we are still here and still whole. It can be scary stuff but necessary. Observe yourself and know your true self ❤️❤️❤️
He accepts himself but he doesn't accept himself being in the situation he's in, which is a form of inner resistance.
I call that shame
He doesn't accept himself.. he is rejecting himself in the presence of others. He is rejecting who is he by assuming in his interactions with other people that what he has to say is not interesting, i.e. that there isn't a place for him. He is also by virtue of not accepting himself in the situation, is judging and rejecting those who enjoy small talk (which is ego.. I like this but they don't like this... I am right- they are wrong, superior inferior), so he's critical of those around him including the children in his life. By virtue of his failure to exercise love and compassion in the direction of others and their preferences whether they differ or not from his; he is further creating a cycle of self hatred (discordance with the true self, and increasing resistance). Also I agree with you in the sense that his home environment is not consistent with who he is, and it is very well possible he's not in the right relationship.. and that seemed to manifest in what he said.... which is that he doesn't want to be alone. Because he's not accepting of himself, and is afraid of being alone, he is possibly settling in a relationship that's uncomfortable for him. The fact that he wants to be alone but is afraid is also not an act of self love.
We exist as bio-feedback. This life is nothing short of a flowering rebirth of Vedic will. By evolving, we grow.
This was me . I like being alone like an introvert, but when I was truly alone I wanted people around . That’s where the conflict within drives you insane .
He truly doesn’t love himself . He wants conditional acceptance . His ego is in the way and he can’t see it . She points out his flaws and he is deflecting . Good watch for me , personally because I too have a hard time loving myself .
Farewell to each of you struggling.
Power of Now by Eckhart, chapter 7 is the key to enlightenment.
It's easy to get caught up in his story because we all have stories like this. At first, I found myself critical of Kim (projecting my own story, my own pain and burdens), but she really did cut through to the heart of the solution: being present... and sans codependency. oxoxox
He's a powerful empath, picking up on others energies. This makes it difficult for him to see truth in himself. Drop everything be willing to die for freedom, this will reveal truth.
I enjoyed her analysis of the situation. Introverts are usually complex people. They are torn by the hardships that their nature presents as well as an urge to protect their fragile ego by blaming others. Although being an introvert is usually a deeper thinker and more sensitive,it takes a toll on other aspects of life making it difficult to accept others even though it goes against their grain. I should know because I am one😒
This is about “ thought “, we have so identify us as our thoughts, we don’t see it’s a thought. We think it’s us. Once thought is seen it just doesn’t have the power to overwhelm us. It was with Tolle I finally saw my thoughts. I still identify as if it was me, but a lot less. Thoughts and be in part feeling, picture in mind eye, story and a repetitive thought. In this moment when we are truly in now, none of this comes up. This is an excellent demonstration of the internal conversation.
she is so beautiful and naturally sees into his soul. the same way you and see a bird or the color blue and we dont have to tell our brains what it is. effortlessly open. he is clearly very chaotic underneath his seemingly calm exterior
He seems so uncomfortable and shy, I don't think I could express myself openly in such a situation like that, surrounded by people and so exposed, my voice would shake too.
At least he's open and honest and addressing this. So many generations - well obviously in unconsciousness - never listened to their body or admitted anything - and took their pain out on others.
I understand in many ways how he feels. And yet addressing and observing it.
This conversation lacks focus and direction.but still helpful.the ultimate relaxation is being yourself. I like that.
Feel the body while reading the comments. Now.
I'm feeling it furiously my good madam, most furiously indeed.
He is probably n INFP overwhelmed with premature judgements of people around him. He pretty well accepts himself but feels bad around people who superficially judge others. It´s a pretty unbearable situation for him.
I like Kim´s advice of connecting to the 'higher self' in such moment, to "fall appart". There lies they key in my opinion to better deal with the situation and listen to the real self to know what to do. To know if it´s worth a try to 'change' people, or to withdraw from the wishy-washy situation to do something important, like resting, or expressing the self creatively.
It´s hard to bother with people who aren´t even aware that they are acting judgemental and shallow. He is clearly aware of it, perceiving it and feeling it with full effect; a feeling of wasted time, burning ressources, in himself as well in the people who talk small most of the time. There is so much more than TV-show-topics, slandering, judging or simulating sympathy. He is an intuitive empath, completely seeing through this people. He wants to stop this terrible, loud, obtrusive situation of people being so immensely egoisticly speaking from their egos. I bet this is exactely how he experiences it. He gets drawn into his ego around such situations. He gets drained by feeling obligated to his partner and kids, he wants to take part in such meeting with her friends out of love for her. He makes himself ill this way if he not sets clear boundaries for himself and talks clear about this with his partner. He either completely needs to avoid these particular friends of her, or he needs to ground them for the sake of compability with him (which btw. would be helpful for their other social contacts as well..) - like for example introducing Eckhart and Kim to these people. If these people would not judgementaly laugh, then there is hope for them. :D
Well, yes, or he needs to follow Kim´s advice and just enjoy himself, no matter that these people will judge him for sitting there without taking part of their shallow stuff. If he is lucky, he will have some moments when tey are touching some topics with a deeper meaning, there he can shine and actually bring something of value to the table; even if this might be rare amongst this round, he will feel happy and gain some energy back.
Puh.. a bunch of text I wrote. I know it is judgemental of shallow judgemental people, but I see authenticity and moral as a higher value than talking about random shit with no other sense than feeding ego. I wish everyone would be more like him, then he would feel way better than he did at the time of this recording. Hope he made it well.
Peace ;)
Feeeeeels being an infj and have close to being P back and forth on test. New to eckhart tolle videos also ❤💜💚 for couple months but so getting better but somehow this video came at a great time I needed
Yes, Eckhart Tolle is toll. :) That´s asign of synchronicity that this video came at the right time, here it came at the right time too.
INFP and INFJ are easily confused.. If you more often have a lot of ideas to a topic and can´t decide for one of them, you are probably a P, whereas when you have a certain knowing and feel that this one is the right one you are more likely a J.
I am speaking about the extraverted and introverted variants of Intuition here. Ne is faster and more vast, whereas Ni is slower but more precise. One made an analogy: Ni is like a Sniper and Ne like a Shotgun. ;)
If you’re an introvert that doesn’t like to be irritated by loud, shallow, unconscious human beings, I suggest to immerse yourself in the presence of those beings and to just observe and withhold judgement. Smile, laugh, and enjoy the show.
Would live to see eckhart answering him
The relationship and her children are not compatible with who he is. He stays because he’s afraid of being alone and then resents them because he feels trapped in a situation that isn’t in line with who he truly is.
My goodness. ..so obvious what was making this man tired...Maybe because I make myself tired through worry and not resting properly/completely. ....but he was so resistant to what Kim was saying especially about not liking himself. I hope he got what she was saying....got it physically within his body mind not just understanding it mentally. Half an hour with Kim...wow.
tell me the obious part about it, please? It's easy to point with words, but the reality of it is something completely different, and if you never fell into that pit, you'd never understand. Worst of all is the bad habit that he developed throughout life, because there was nobody with a bit of intelligence to notice and guide him the right way while he was young. It's pretty hard to be present when you are overwhelmed, because you must recover before you start enjoying life again. And while he's overwhelmed, his habits keep him there. Good thing he went to the retreat, but that might be simply not enough.
This guy "seems" sad within....And IMO it "seems" like (from the info he has provided) that his partner is not helping, which is even sadder.....Hopefully this platform has assisted him in bettering his situation on some level.....(My heart goes out to him💐)
I wish I could hug and hold this man. I feel his pain.
What I'm sensing is that I can feel that he really wants to let go but on his terms.. I feel that he attempting to control his "letting go".. on his terms.. but because he hasn't accepted the outer world with authentic Self love.. which he thinks he has.. he actually can't let go.. he needs to practice self love and acceptance rather than putting his energy into letting go.. you can't let go if you haven't loved and accepted..
Being yourself.Break thoughts and judgement.Presence consciousness is not a thought
Thank you! Just what i needed. This morning i felt falling apart and i felt so scared and lost.
You reminded me that is a blessing!💜
It is his relationships that are stressing him. He is more solitary and his close ones are shallow. They dont like his isolation and he doesn't like their shallowness. He is in fear of not being acceptable in his family. THats stressful. There must be a compromise. a plan. or he will lose this relationship.
God bless you brother 🌺
He believes in his thoughts, in what he thinks is his truth. He sees himself as a victim.
I relate to his situation so much.
Teaching of That stillness , that leading back to the basic is graceful 🤲🙏🍀☘️
He was in genuine pain. I don't understand her irritation at this. I don't feel she understood him and was using her irritation to respond. Normally she's not like this, not in other videos I've seen. I don't feel she was on point for this man, it's unfortunate. I really hope he got the help he needed to move through. X
Oh jeez I'm gonna get flack for this. But he is stressed out on Sunday thiking about having to work and pay for two kids that are not his own. I was a step mom and I am a mom of 4 they are HARD!! and graditude is sparse.
Nothing replaces health, I'm actually beginning to think this philosophy is dangerous. I like Kim & these techniques may be useful but nothing replaces direct action to avert stress & taking rest, nattering kids are no excuse 😮
By summoning, we self-actualize. We exist as vibrations. Fulfillment requires exploration.
Very relatable experience and very beautiful and healing answer.
He should start by noticing the urge to get away from people/ children. Then act on it if needed. But start with that awareness, then once you practice it, bring the wall of resistance down by staying there and let it go through you.
agree, though sometimes it can be too overwhelming for the nervous system and there is indeed a need to get away, rest and recharge in private. No need to force anything, not even awareness, if it is doesn't feel right at a certain moment.
This came just at the right time for me. My thoughts have been overwhelming me. Thankyou so much for helping me get back on track!
longing to fix a situation is wrong.
Just be conscience and it will fix by itself with time.
Looking back on the past leads to anger resentment,
"Thinking " and Looking into the future leads to anxiety.
It's the only thing I'm enjoying here 😊
I’m grateful for coming across this.. I relate to this man. I lived in a paradox, where I “accept others as they are” but was changing myself to become more accepted... interesting. Unfortunately, I live in the US and being African American has been a problem for a lot of us. But thanks the Kim, I realized not everyone thinks the same as the collective.
He probably has anxiety and depression. And seems like he may have low self-confidence. I'll bet he feels other peoples discomfort around him and it worsens his self-esteem. I wonder what his typical diet and lifestyle is like. He should implement a totally holistic diet and lifestyle approach through organic detox and nutrition. Lots of people experience emotional disorders due to toxic overload, malnutrition and heightened stress. Also, MEDITATE. Another thing... I wonder if his family dynamic right now isn't serving his greater purpose. Maybe he could find a new scene if he isn't too involved with his relationship. But that's all on him.
Being at the present moment is great. Wonder if that's all we live for? How do we use the present moment to answer the questions of " who am I, where am I and why I am here (on this earth)"?
I think he do not know what love is, unconditional love! Because then he would start making choices which brings him out of the stress without hurting others.
Sometimes it's appropriate to suggest good old fashioned therapy! Ongoing therapy would help this young man...a lot. ( I only suggest therapists who have 20 years experience)
i've been indulging in my thoughts and painbody for the last few months and this video is perfectly timed. Time to come back to the present and let my real self stretch his legs lol
You can take Bach Flower Remedy Olive or Hornbeam for fatigue. There’s others also from FES flower essence services from North America, Australian Bush Flower Essences also do some for tiredness. 🌺
This is a great video. Such a clear explanation of how present moment awareness can help one deal with the stresses of everyday life. To the extent where one can limit the stress and still remain peaceful when faced with challenging situations xxxx
something practical too, that he could have done, is to use ammunition until that habitual sunday moment gets loosened somewhat from it's vortex. To meet that (usually) dreaded moment is so painful.. so trick it.. don't be in your usual spot when it comes. Make sure you have some support figured out for that time this coming sunday..some kind of variation.. at least at first; a friend, an activity, a restaurant.. an errand that isn't monotonous.. some way you can whip up some enthusiastic energy around that time to launch from.. and see a different panorama..or perspective.
your words in this video is so profound . every time i watch it , i feel a sense of liberation . thank you dear Kim
It’s horrible to live a life that’s unbelievably stressful and where you are of no value whatsoever
If he's depressed, this won't work. He will recharge a bit, but it won't be enough. Some people need support from medicines, especially when they spiral down. They also need more options which a psychotherapist can help generate. Like she said, it may take weeks, months. How's he going to get through that?
Thank you so much for this! I found myself reflecting throughout watching this video. I see now how I've forgotten the importance of just being still and accepting the present moment. I've been practicing self affirmations through meditation, and been allowing myself to feel that I have obtained what I want to bring to fruition. But I do know I have a habit of always thinking and over analyzing past events that have brought me discomfort. I want to understand things that have happened so that they don't arise again. But in turn I keep jumping between past and future, and when presence happens it's through my body communicating to me that I'm not feeling well. Which ends up bringing me more stress and anxiety. Through this video I now have the awareness that I need to practice being still and present more often.
You don't need to practice anything. Just notice what is already here. Making it into "a practice" is another strategy by the restless mind to avoid being here, to introduce time into the picture. You don't need "a practice" in order to notice what is happening right now in you and around you. It is immediate, it is right now, it is real, it is the reality (beyond the word 'reality'), the actuality of this moment. You don't need "a practice" in order to notice that you are not paying attention to something. You just notice. It won't be seen in the future while you are "practicing", it is here now. THIS IS ALL THERE IS.
For example, whatever is here now (or at any other moment), you can go (with the attention) to that place. To really feel into that place, not the concept of that place but the actuality of it, the reality of it, the rawness of it.. just the feeling itself, without any labels on it and without any expectations or demands on it. Just deeply allowing that fear/irritation/anger/sadness.. being with it, allowing it to be here, being the container for it that holds it and allows it unfold and express itself (in whatever form).
No need to do anything to it, to try to fix it, or to change it, or to try and get rid of it, but just hold it with love and allow it to be here and give it all your attention. That's all. It will move or change or morph or disappear on it own once it feels that it was fully received and heard without judgement.
It's kind of a paradox, the moment the feeling knows that it is allowed to be here fully without reservations and that it is loved fully, at that moment it doesn't feel the need to be here anymore..
You don't need to do anything, just allow it to be here and listen to it with full attention and without judgement.
He most definitely needed Eckhart to answer his question. He could find a much more healing answer from him.
So helpful for me today just perfect thank you namaste 🙏
I get him ...
Marianne Williamson did not write Course in Miracles. She interpreted it and conducted lectures & classes. Course in Miracles was written by Helen Schucman.
Ego corrects so what
Wow! Thank you so much! This was so helpful for me! 🙏🏻💗
Infinite Love ❤
Wow. Up to now I've never watched anything of Kim. Such a beautiful vessel. The mechanics of the conflicted mind are softly encoded. Such seeing goes far beyond analysis. During listening the energy flows in such comfortable, soothing way that one sees and feels simultaneously. Wonderful contribution. Thank you.
So why is this guy in a relationship that has kids...
Common 'problem' of elder souls is fitting in a lower frequence context.
Robert Walter such true
It's important for these 'older' Souls to not become too out of touch with the suffering of the lower worlds and their inhabitants. So...awkward scenarios do indeed tend to arise.
Totally Love Kim Eng ❤️
I am not my life situation
Wouah thanks you, I am feeling so inspired by this talk and exploration. I am also a guy who is a lot in my thougts and awareness of my body helps me a lot to relax and to let go of overthinking and slowing down... :)
Look into Human Design Reflectors my friend. You may be part of the 1% of population who has a combination of being highly sensitive and completely open. I am a Reflector and share the same experience you describe. It is not the situation of partner, job, and kids. I have found I can leave any situation but not the condition. New day, new circumstances same challenge. In any case you are handling yourself better than most. Being a HSP can be especially challenging for men. Many HSP turn to drugs and alcohol to cope.
I think he needs a therapist with experience in Asperger's. Come to think of it, she seems to need that, too.
He's definitely struggling with a few things... sometimes things all roll into one making a bigger whole. I know he talked about endocrine issues but before he said that, I felt like he has adrenal fatigue for one.. Also sounds like some depression ( but being tired and frazzled all the time from adrenal fatigue can definitely make it feel like depression ).. I am also an HSP so when he said that it made a lot of sense too. Being and HSP can also lead to feelings of burn out.. I totally feel for him. It doesn't feel good at all to be stuck in those frazzled, tired, ( what I call hit by a truck tired feelings ) and feeling like you want to do more but just can't. Hopefully he can see a good endocronolgist and get some of his stats in order whatever that turns out to be. I hope he gets back to feeling good again ! I really feel for him, trying to do is best.
wow, you're good. thank you.
I so agree with maddannyWest he is having resistance to what is which is the kids and whatever happens around him like his wife's friends we have to accept what is surrender to life there's peace then!
This was very helpful! Thank you 💗
When he asks the question @ 30:00 something tells me he has not accepted what was just given to him. Hopefully he wakes up soon otherwise he will continue to be in the state in which he is in
Beautifuuuul answer and explanation ❣️✨☺️
Wow really great talk of this kim. Never seen her before just eckhart. She has great stuff too. But not like she wrote power of now... Lol but she had great points at
7:30. 10:30. 15:50. 27:50. 29:50.
But the " mind " never stops . Don't forget to tell her about the anti - anxiety goodies you take .
Thank you Kim
I feel overwhelmed by constantly trying to live up to spiritual ideas communicated by others.... These 'signposts' only have meaning when they are realised. Then who needs them then anyway??
Wow wow !!! Great advice thank you so much ❤
He could move to the Netherlands, life much easier here, fuck student debt. Move elsewhere and never return. Beautiful man, please build a life elsewhere. Usa in many places is harsh and unsafe
I find it wrong that she recommends him to break down
Also, detachment is just an avoidance technique. He be better suited to allow himself to feel his feelings. And reduce his emotional buildups.
This is using the approach of Vivian Dittmar here.
But suppose, he realises he aint be able to have the kids around, and decides to leave his partner, so what if he becomes a happier human henceby?
Where is Eckhart?
drinks café with a baseball cap :)
Stressed out working to support his partners two kids ... time to wake up mate
Thank you Kim ❤❤
He has problem with endocrine system , as he said . Noise sensitivity ect
Thank you so much 🙇❇
The Great Replacement in action. If this is progression, I don't want it!
I found this to be a rather clueless analysis of someone who is obviously very stressed about his job his finances and his not coping and his partner is not handling this and is putting pressure on him not to fall apart. And if he falls apart he will probably lose his job and he won't be able to pay his loans and assist his partner. Simply he's not coping with real difficult financial problems. He is probably depressed.
I definitely sensed a depressed man.
Yes this might be true. He definitely needs to find peace and a clear head to get the right inspirations and opportunities to cope and solve his situation.
I agree with clueless analysis.
He should leave that woman, her bastards and live life his pace.
@@cesteres I agree! Well-put.
She’s just stressing him out more /:
Kim 💜💜💜love vibrations from London.