Thank you for this wisdom!! 1. Ask for his advice. 2. Ask for his help. 3. Don't talk to him a child. 4. To be his cheerleader (encourage). 5. Choose to trust him. 6. Honor him in front of others. 7. Appreciate him (thank you). 8. Say yes (or lock in a future time). 9. Allow him to influence him. 10. Let him know what you want. 11. Do things together shoulder, 12. And Face to Face
My opinion and thoughts are this Most couples have job's outside the house for various reasons Hence both should be helping with daily chores within the house I personally was on the road alot with my business When I was home I knew how to do the basic laundry plus my own clothes Took care of dirty dishes and trash outside and to the curbside Change burned out lightbulbs I could reach Make sure cars were maintained and filled with gas before I had to leave again
With all these marriages failing and struggling you would think more would be listening. Sad.... great advice! I try to reapect my husband, but he never really gives me feedback so im just guessing. Most times i just choose to keep my mouth shut so i dont risk disrespect. This was helpful! Thank you!
Heyy….please pray more and more that your husband reciprocates. Pray daily without fail…with a lot of sincerity and dedication ❤…divine will definitely help you
It's always hard to define normal but having a hobby like that seems to fit what some guys like to do. Thanks for asking. I've got more tips like this that I'd like to send you. May I have your email? Thanks
My husband keeps me out of anything that is going on in his life. He is so secretive. And it is so annoying. How do I get him to be more open with me n tell me what he is doing etc or what is happening in his life. Why doesn't he speak to me about things. I have to book an appointment to spend time with my own husband as he always makes himself busy on his days off. I want to spend time with my husband on his days off cos I don't feel we spend enough time together. He works three shift pattern So it hard . I just want to grow together with him. How does he stop being mean also. He is quite aggressive and had a really bad awful attitude when he speaks to me. Or I say something and he is on me trying to bring me down. He is a. Christian also. We attend the same church. But it is like he hears something different all the time. What is going on with him. I want him to quit being horrible
Wow sounds like you're having a rough ride! I'm a man in my 50s, and I've given more than a few rough rides for various reasons - I can't say they are all good reasons, but I'm hoping they may help you to see the insanities and inanities. - I'm a jerk. that's why women like me. I still need to be a decent human being at the same time and that's not easy - men the last 50 years have been raised by unwitting and unconscious people, just like the women have. I've been secretive with women who poop on my dreams and aspirations, and jam their heels in when we have to pivot and solve problems. She's not cheerleader, and/or she subverts everything into a passive control game because she won't manage her feelings and recognize she's the anchor to otherwise clear sailing to the paradise I can bring us to. Sometimes, I've just allowed myself to get so checked out dealing with daily incoherent babbling at the end of long days that I don't notice myself being a prick when my 18 hours of daily sacrifice, and thousands of lost opportunities for the sake of the "relationship" aren't appreciated, and aren't moving me towards a peaceful life. I just would go numb at best keeping everything floating for someone clueless about how life is. If the family income dropped by 1/3 so I could get familiar with myself and stop being horrible, then I also know that the woman I'm with will also complain about the missing money, and insist I work " better". I have a mission. Your man has a mission (he might not know that). A woman not on board with her man's mission is an anchor or at least dead weight. I'm sorry to hear he brings you down - I have behaved that way when I perceive the one I'm chained to to be an incorrigible idiot that can't follow instructions. It's frustration, and despair that I've just worked 3 shifts and I get home, and I'm still working to correct idiocy instead of having peace. I don't mind if a person isn't the sharpest tool, I mind when they don't cooperate with the plan I have for them. Some ideas are crap and need to be shot down. There is a loving way to do it, of course, but it is difficult with someone who can't tell truth from fiction while insisting they do. not at first, but after months and years.... As you can see, these are all situations I put myself in, regardless of the woman. What can you DO about it? Ask him about his mission, ask him about his sacrifices, but don't ask him about his feelings because you already know he's angry, uptight, and hostile and nothing in your known world is working. You'll have to pull from the unknown. You have to own your complicity in the situation, as does he. I know many men and women who never own their complicity in making life miserable. Avoid these people and don't be one. Look within yourself, read the Gospel of Thomas together (not in your bible, it was on the editing room floor instead) and see what's true, regardless of what your church says. Jesus wasn't building a church; he was freeing people from them - If he's (your man) actually read the gospel and asked questions, he'd know that Jesus said to calm the emotions, calm the thoughts, and enter within oneself to find the kingdom of heaven. but it's put in there in a cryptic way. You man will not accept leadership from you, so you can't tell him. but you can ASK him what it means "Do not fear, take no thought, enter within yourself" - it's NOT presented that way, you have to read it and actually comprehend the conversation and context so don't use my words when you talk to him, do some legwork and use your own words. Most Christian priests don't understand this even though it says pretty plainly in the text that it's the key, and that the religious leaders knew this was the case, never did it, and refused to guide people to it. Nothing has changed - like the man said, it's a narrow path and few are on it. The kingdom of heaven Truly is within, no one can bring you their but yourself so, the Church can only provide support, but the authority is not in them, they have no power to open the door or walk you through. Your work is cut out for you, my dear! IF you have gas left in the tank.... get HIS church leaders to talk to him, not you. Men respect authority chains, so you can use it to your advantage - not to tattle tale. You will absolutely lose every power struggle with a man, even when you think you win you will be losing something you can't get back. Get on his page, and he'll know your both reading the same book. get on board, and he'll know you're traveling together; he's the captain, you're the 1st mate. IF you're not behaving like a 1st mate, then you're a passenger he needs to feed. IT could be he doesn't trust you with the task, IT could be he's just working too much and lost the plot - point being people want to be content in their own home. It could be he thinks your to incompetent for the job of 1st mate, but he loves you and doesn't have the tools to lead the relationship properly or train you up and lead you. Maybe you were disloyal in some way and he told you and you didn't hear him. I can assure you men stop talking to people who don't listen the 1st 3 times. after that we just get worse. Ultimately, you both as individuals need to have healthy relationships with yourselves. if you can't make yourself happy, neither will anyone else, right? I don't know how this is going to get better for you - there are a thousand ways to botch the correction and see it as someone else's fault - from his point of view, from your point of view....Also, nothing makes a woman happy, so, he might not know that and be putting effort into the wrong direction. he needs to focus on the mission, and enroll you in support, and regularly dip into the calm space where he can cultivate his self awareness and refine things. Your job is some of that and mainly to be a compliment to his life. I'm not in your head, I don't know you at all to say what's really going on. Men aren't spontaneously angry just for waking up. Use Curiosity and Love in the face of upsets - our own, 1stly, and don't be a punching bag. He's not suppose to bring the emotional baggage from outside the relationship into the sacred space. the problems can be discussed, but the emotional baggage no. Definitely get help from NOT STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET, go to couples who are happy, with happy husbands -WOMEN GIVE BAD ADVICE - That's a whole book more I'm not going to explain so listen to the man, 9/10 times- confirm they are what they appear to be - at least content, and that they have generated the environment you would enjoy in your life, too. Be at peace, Love, as best you can. We're in an asylum run by the patients, including ourselves as inmates, until we're not. Good luck and I hope the inspiration for the just right thing hits you in surprising way that tells you it comes from the High Place.
@hallucitania - I'd love to talk with you and see if my marriage coaching could help you. Here's a link to book a free call: tidycal.com/kdupee1/30-minute-clarity-call I hope to hear from you soon. Kelly
Best advice. If you cant imagine your future spouse as old, wrinkly, and still think they are hot then do not get married. You are marrying strictly for sex and it is a marriage of gonads not humans. You wont always love each other but if your best friends you will ride it out. People need to be marrying people not their sexual organs. That is another huge reason why marriages are not lasting. They arent in love.
Well how do you teach him ? Geez ffs why he’s stupid . It’s so hard to be married because my father knew everything and could fix everything . It’s very hard
In my view a submissive wife is showing respect by completly and without reservations submitting to her man/husband. The husband should have written and verbal rules for her to abide by or accept the consequences as he sees fit. She should have permission from him to address him. He should be addressed as he sees fit such as: SIR or MASTER or whatever He dictate to her.
You're deranged. The bible calls wives to submit, not mindlessly obey. Meaning we can voice opinions and influence him, but the husband makes the final decision.
I thought the bible says for the husband to love their wives and for wives to OBEY their husbands. A wife who obeys her husband is a wife who is respecting her husband. She should serve him, make his life easier, do all the errands and housework, caring for the children and everything else in between even if she works outside of the home. It is her job as a wife. There would be peace on Earth if wives and women in serious loving relationship would submit to the man's needs and desires.
You don't understand the bible and should probably focus your own submission to God by reading it and asking the Holy Spirit to explain it you before lecturing women on submission from a place of ignorance.
Again you are wrong here. If you want a housewife, let her be just that. She should not work outside the home. The husband is called to PROVIDE for his wife and household. He is called to protect and love his wife, providing for her financially everything she needs.
So Jesus was a mean boss that was barked out commands to the church to make his life easier ? Lol. That sounds very un-Christlike ... and I'm not even a Christian
I totally disagree with the advice to ask your husband for help with the housework or anything pertinent to running a household even if the wife work outside of the home. It is her job as a wife. He deserves to be attended to; life is hard for him as well. He should have a soft place to fall at home and that is when a sensitive and submissive wife comes in. It is her job to make his life easier by serving and submitting to his desires as he should dictate his wife. In addition, the husband should have a set of written rules by which she must abide or accept the consequences as he sees fit. If and when HE wants to make love, it is the responsibility of the woman/wife to joyfully submit to his desires. After all this is what you signed for right?
Thank you for this wisdom!!
1. Ask for his advice.
2. Ask for his help.
3. Don't talk to him a child.
4. To be his cheerleader (encourage).
5. Choose to trust him.
6. Honor him in front of others.
7. Appreciate him (thank you).
8. Say yes (or lock in a future time).
9. Allow him to influence him.
10. Let him know what you want.
11. Do things together shoulder,
12. And Face to Face
You're welcome. Glad you liked it.
My opinion and thoughts are this
Most couples have job's outside the house for various reasons
Hence both should be helping with daily chores within the house
I personally was on the road alot with my business
When I was home I knew how to do the basic laundry plus my own clothes
Took care of dirty dishes and trash outside and to the curbside
Change burned out lightbulbs I could reach
Make sure cars were maintained and filled with gas before I had to leave again
Great ideas! i'd like to send you my free guide, "Speak Love - Tips to strengthen your relationship" May I have your email?
Thank you for giving examples and explanations. Very clear communication. Awesome. Keep it up.
Thank you! i'd like to send you my free guide, "Speak Love - Tips to strengthen your relationship" May I have your email?
With all these marriages failing and struggling you would think more would be listening. Sad.... great advice! I try to reapect my husband, but he never really gives me feedback so im just guessing. Most times i just choose to keep my mouth shut so i dont risk disrespect. This was helpful! Thank you!
Heyy….please pray more and more that your husband reciprocates. Pray daily without fail…with a lot of sincerity and dedication ❤…divine will definitely help you
How can I schedule a clarity call with you? It's urgent. 🙏🏻
@@Wingsofchange2024 please text me at 626-804-1731 and let’s set it up
I’m available most of the day on Wednesday November 20. What works for you? I’m in the Los Angeles area, where do you live?
@KellyDuPeemarriagecoach Washington. Wednesday works later in the day for me.
@ could you do 3 pm pacific time on Wednesday?
@KellyDuPeemarriagecoach Yes, that would work. Curious, do you have any Monday slots? Monday would be ideal but if not that time is good. Thank you.
My husband doesn't like sports or long walks he prefers restoring an old moped he bought. Is he normal?
It's always hard to define normal but having a hobby like that seems to fit what some guys like to do. Thanks for asking. I've got more tips like this that I'd like to send you. May I have your email? Thanks
❤️
Thanks! i'd like to send you my free guide, "Speak Love - Tips to strengthen your relationship" May I have your email?
Do you still take calls please?
Yes. Please call me at 626-804-1731
@@Mrssupermumm yes. Please call or text me at 626-804-1731
My husband keeps me out of anything that is going on in his life. He is so secretive. And it is so annoying. How do I get him to be more open with me n tell me what he is doing etc or what is happening in his life. Why doesn't he speak to me about things. I have to book an appointment to spend time with my own husband as he always makes himself busy on his days off. I want to spend time with my husband on his days off cos I don't feel we spend enough time together. He works three shift pattern So it hard . I just want to grow together with him. How does he stop being mean also. He is quite aggressive and had a really bad awful attitude when he speaks to me. Or I say something and he is on me trying to bring me down. He is a. Christian also. We attend the same church. But it is like he hears something different all the time. What is going on with him. I want him to quit being horrible
Wow sounds like you're having a rough ride! I'm a man in my 50s, and I've given more than a few rough rides for various reasons - I can't say they are all good reasons, but I'm hoping they may help you to see the insanities and inanities. - I'm a jerk. that's why women like me. I still need to be a decent human being at the same time and that's not easy - men the last 50 years have been raised by unwitting and unconscious people, just like the women have. I've been secretive with women who poop on my dreams and aspirations, and jam their heels in when we have to pivot and solve problems. She's not cheerleader, and/or she subverts everything into a passive control game because she won't manage her feelings and recognize she's the anchor to otherwise clear sailing to the paradise I can bring us to. Sometimes, I've just allowed myself to get so checked out dealing with daily incoherent babbling at the end of long days that I don't notice myself being a prick when my 18 hours of daily sacrifice, and thousands of lost opportunities for the sake of the "relationship" aren't appreciated, and aren't moving me towards a peaceful life. I just would go numb at best keeping everything floating for someone clueless about how life is. If the family income dropped by 1/3 so I could get familiar with myself and stop being horrible, then I also know that the woman I'm with will also complain about the missing money, and insist I work "
better". I have a mission. Your man has a mission (he might not know that). A woman not on board with her man's mission is an anchor or at least dead weight. I'm sorry to hear he brings you down - I have behaved that way when I perceive the one I'm chained to to be an incorrigible idiot that can't follow instructions. It's frustration, and despair that I've just worked 3 shifts and I get home, and I'm still working to correct idiocy instead of having peace. I don't mind if a person isn't the sharpest tool, I mind when they don't cooperate with the plan I have for them. Some ideas are crap and need to be shot down. There is a loving way to do it, of course, but it is difficult with someone who can't tell truth from fiction while insisting they do. not at first, but after months and years.... As you can see, these are all situations I put myself in, regardless of the woman. What can you DO about it? Ask him about his mission, ask him about his sacrifices, but don't ask him about his feelings because you already know he's angry, uptight, and hostile and nothing in your known world is working. You'll have to pull from the unknown. You have to own your complicity in the situation, as does he. I know many men and women who never own their complicity in making life miserable. Avoid these people and don't be one. Look within yourself, read the Gospel of Thomas together (not in your bible, it was on the editing room floor instead) and see what's true, regardless of what your church says. Jesus wasn't building a church; he was freeing people from them - If he's (your man) actually read the gospel and asked questions, he'd know that Jesus said to calm the emotions, calm the thoughts, and enter within oneself to find the kingdom of heaven. but it's put in there in a cryptic way. You man will not accept leadership from you, so you can't tell him. but you can ASK him what it means "Do not fear, take no thought, enter within yourself" - it's NOT presented that way, you have to read it and actually comprehend the conversation and context so don't use my words when you talk to him, do some legwork and use your own words. Most Christian priests don't understand this even though it says pretty plainly in the text that it's the key, and that the religious leaders knew this was the case, never did it, and refused to guide people to it. Nothing has changed - like the man said, it's a narrow path and few are on it. The kingdom of heaven Truly is within, no one can bring you their but yourself so, the Church can only provide support, but the authority is not in them, they have no power to open the door or walk you through. Your work is cut out for you, my dear! IF you have gas left in the tank.... get HIS church leaders to talk to him, not you. Men respect authority chains, so you can use it to your advantage - not to tattle tale. You will absolutely lose every power struggle with a man, even when you think you win you will be losing something you can't get back. Get on his page, and he'll know your both reading the same book. get on board, and he'll know you're traveling together; he's the captain, you're the 1st mate. IF you're not behaving like a 1st mate, then you're a passenger he needs to feed. IT could be he doesn't trust you with the task, IT could be he's just working too much and lost the plot - point being people want to be content in their own home. It could be he thinks your to incompetent for the job of 1st mate, but he loves you and doesn't have the tools to lead the relationship properly or train you up and lead you. Maybe you were disloyal in some way and he told you and you didn't hear him. I can assure you men stop talking to people who don't listen the 1st 3 times. after that we just get worse. Ultimately, you both as individuals need to have healthy relationships with yourselves. if you can't make yourself happy, neither will anyone else, right? I don't know how this is going to get better for you - there are a thousand ways to botch the correction and see it as someone else's fault - from his point of view, from your point of view....Also, nothing makes a woman happy, so, he might not know that and be putting effort into the wrong direction. he needs to focus on the mission, and enroll you in support, and regularly dip into the calm space where he can cultivate his self awareness and refine things. Your job is some of that and mainly to be a compliment to his life. I'm not in your head, I don't know you at all to say what's really going on. Men aren't spontaneously angry just for waking up. Use Curiosity and Love in the face of upsets - our own, 1stly, and don't be a punching bag. He's not suppose to bring the emotional baggage from outside the relationship into the sacred space. the problems can be discussed, but the emotional baggage no. Definitely get help from NOT STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET, go to couples who are happy, with happy husbands -WOMEN GIVE BAD ADVICE - That's a whole book more I'm not going to explain so listen to the man, 9/10 times- confirm they are what they appear to be - at least content, and that they have generated the environment you would enjoy in your life, too.
Be at peace, Love, as best you can. We're in an asylum run by the patients, including ourselves as inmates, until we're not. Good luck and I hope the inspiration for the just right thing hits you in surprising way that tells you it comes from the High Place.
@hallucitania - I'd love to talk with you and see if my marriage coaching could help you. Here's a link to book a free call: tidycal.com/kdupee1/30-minute-clarity-call
I hope to hear from you soon.
Kelly
@@KellyDuPeemarriagecoach 'Appreciated I'll take a look.
If that what it takes to be submissive you have to accept the way he is. He is the HUSBAND and you are HIS wife. Just obey and serve.
Have you tried complete submission and obedience without reservation? He obviously not satisfied with your performance.
Best advice. If you cant imagine your future spouse as old, wrinkly, and still think they are hot then do not get married. You are marrying strictly for sex and it is a marriage of gonads not humans. You wont always love each other but if your best friends you will ride it out. People need to be marrying people not their sexual organs. That is another huge reason why marriages are not lasting. They arent in love.
Very true!
Being in love isn't even biblical...
@@7Logik interesting thought. You’re right!
@7Logik most human emotions aren't. Guess what we still feel it.
@@7Logik Songs of Solomon is not biblical?
Well how do you teach him ? Geez ffs why he’s stupid . It’s so hard to be married because my father knew everything and could fix everything . It’s very hard
In my view a submissive wife is showing respect by completly and without reservations submitting to her man/husband. The husband should have written and verbal rules for her to abide by or accept the consequences as he sees fit. She should have permission from him to address him. He should be addressed as he sees fit such as: SIR or MASTER or whatever He dictate to her.
😂…go read the Bible
You're deranged. The bible calls wives to submit, not mindlessly obey. Meaning we can voice opinions and influence him, but the husband makes the final decision.
I thought the bible says for the husband to love their wives and for wives to OBEY their husbands. A wife who obeys her husband is a wife who is respecting her husband. She should serve him, make his life easier, do all the errands and housework, caring for the children and everything else in between even if she works outside of the home. It is her job as a wife. There would be peace on Earth if wives and women in serious loving relationship would submit to the man's needs and desires.
You don't understand the bible and should probably focus your own submission to God by reading it and asking the Holy Spirit to explain it you before lecturing women on submission from a place of ignorance.
Again you are wrong here. If you want a housewife, let her be just that. She should not work outside the home. The husband is called to PROVIDE for his wife and household. He is called to protect and love his wife, providing for her financially everything she needs.
So Jesus was a mean boss that was barked out commands to the church to make his life easier ? Lol. That sounds very un-Christlike ... and I'm not even a Christian
Better to hire a housekeeper wtf ?!
I totally disagree with the advice to ask your husband for help with the housework or anything pertinent to running a household even if the wife work outside of the home. It is her job as a wife. He deserves to be attended to; life is hard for him as well. He should have a soft place to fall at home and that is when a sensitive and submissive wife comes in. It is her job to make his life easier by serving and submitting to his desires as he should dictate his wife. In addition, the husband should have a set of written rules by which she must abide or accept the consequences as he sees fit. If and when HE wants to make love, it is the responsibility of the woman/wife to joyfully submit to his desires. After all this is what you signed for right?
🤔😬
It’s clear you want a mindless slave, not a wife. READ THE BIBLE!!
What do you think someone who loved his wife as Christ loved the church would be behave? Is that what you are describing?