Newish movie on hulu, Suburban Gothic; horrid writing staring criminal minds Stars and Kat Dennings. Has to be a passion project of Mathew Grey Gubbler...please review.
When Dave took off the shirt in excitement I couldn't help but laugh my ass off!! 😂😂😂 Steven Seagull is so bad these days that he has hypnotized Dave into a fan of his..
I love how his stunt double is executing spinning kicks that only a master acrobat could dream of performing, while the real Steven Seagal is just half-heartedly flourishing and back slapping the other doubles in the market. Director: "Cut! All right, that's a wrap for today. Literally. Steven, here's your six roasted lamb wraps and a wheelbarrow of cash for that scene." Double: "What about me?" Director: "You'll get your $300 when we finish shooting the movie, like everyone else! Stop asking or you're fired."
I wanted to laugh at the wrap joke, quality work, but it's just too real. People in the world get paid gigantic sums for what seems like little to no effort as is, but at least we usually don't WITNESS it. The idea of undeniably being the hardest working person in front of that camera by multiple orders of magnitude, only to see that 10lbs of lard stuffed into a 5lb bag sack of shit making /millions/ while I have a day rate that wouldn't cover rent in LA is just....*shudder* At least it's Eastern Europe. Maybe it's National Lampoon's Erupean Vacation and $300 in Prague is like 45K in the States.
It creeps me out too, just imagine if your daughter was in one of his movies and how you'd feel about it, any dad who let's his daughter in a Seagal should hav parental rights taken away
And now I’m wondering if the people who made this just handed him a script that was titled ”the Beast“ and as soon as they were in post they just slapped ”Belly of“ in front of it. Kind like China made him lose to Tyson by just filming the fight without him there.
@@MichelLinschoten I was going to say I saw a interview with someone. He goes Seagal said i just read the best script ever to be written. The guy said who wrote it and he responded I did 😂.
The best thing about these Seagal movies is that I think he genuinely believes he's doing this stuff for real. It's pathetic and sad, but also hilarious.
Class - I was in Bangkok when this was being filmed and saw sensei seagull in the flesh...the waddle was present in 2003...I'm proud to say I still haven't bothered my hole to watch it
I paused at the first 40 seconds and we already have: - A new acolyte condemned to watch bad movies with you; - Brian's love for Doom turning into a dedicated movie shirt; - Erin's happiness with the new sponsor; - A Seagal movie. I mean, this episode JUST CAN'T go wrong.
The director/choreographer is Ching Siu-Tung, who is an absolute Hong Kong legend. If you want to absolutely lose your mind, I recommend A Chinese Ghost Story and Jet Li's Swordsman II. His action stuff is always fun even if the film is less than stellar. Have you watched any of earlier Seagal yet? He had a string of genuinely decent to great ones from Above the Law in 1988 until Executive Decision in 1996. Then it gets REAL dicey. Seagal seemed to be a little open in the early 2000s for experimentation as he also did Exit Wounds with DMX.Same director as the Jet Li/DMX film Cradle 2 the Grave. He does WIREWORK in that one! (well, his double does, but possibly him for a little bit too). There's some hilarious stories from that set by Tom Arnold. Seagal went out the wrong door on a boat and went straight into a river :D
@@JasonBrant As long as you sincerely have a good time and your livers can take the additional session, there‘s no way this won‘t pay off You guys have had great chemistry since day one, it passes on to the viewer 👍🏽🔥
@@JasonBrant I can imagine all the extra stuff adds up pretty quick, but I hope that having a chance to watch a sort of palate cleanser before/after a Sifu film helps out.
4:40 - Holy shit! That's no ordinary kung fu choreographer, that's Ching Siu-tung! He's one of the greatest action choreographers and action film directors in Hong Kong, ever. But not even his name on this will make me watch it.
To think of all the resources the Russian Army had to waste to get him to Crimea. The half-track to carry his ass...the platoon of conscripts that had to carry after his ankles give out...a battalion's worth of 20 year old MRE's eaten in a day. Did he up the bounty offered for freezing Zelinsky in carbonite?
I love how much I learn watching these videos. Who knew that in the time it takes for someone to shoot an arrow one can run to a pair a swords across the room, unsheathe one, and be ready to fight before the arrow finishes its journey? Seagal truly is a master of his craft.
I've noticed after every seagal movie the guys have fits of rage that make this worth watching. Not the dumpster of a "film" they're watching but the pure disdain they feel during and after just gets me every time
24:30 Seagal's character is probably thinking "If I can't save my daughter at least I can try and replace her by getting this lady pregnant." And the actress is probably thinking "Can we get Steven's stunt double in here?"
In the 90s I loved Segal’s movies SO much, I’ll never forget four of us (2 of us literally) rolling around laughing at that deli scene that was hilariously violent as we rewound and watched it multiple times. Now I can’t enjoy them knowing what he was like to his costars. If only he was humble and funny and not a narcissistic sociopath. Those 90s movies were so freaking awesomely funny. I miss them. Gol dang it.
As Gene LeBell passed away this week, here is something you may enjoy. During the making of the film “Out for Justice” starring Steven Segal, Segal would brag to people that with his aikido training, nobody could choke him out. As the story goes, he told LeBell, then 58, “Old man, these guys are saying you could choke me out.” LeBell is said to have responded, “I’ve been around since the Last Supper. I’m so old, my first movie was Birth of a Nation. But I could choke you out. Yeah.” The story always told, that LeBell would coyly indicate was true but never fully say, is that LeBell then choked him out and Seagal lost control of his bowels. Seagal denied the incident ever took place, and said LeBell was a “sick, pathalogical scumbag liar.” Steven Lambert, a stuntman, said he was there for the confrontation. His description was that Seagal told LeBell that his choke wouldn’t work on him. LeBell went to put him in the choke, but before locking it on, Seagal threw a forearm to LeBell’s balls. LeBell’s version of the story did include the forearm to the balls. Seagal had a reputation in movies for beating up stunt men and giving them low blows. Lambert said that the low blow hurt LeBell for an instant, but he quickly used a foot sweep and threw Seagal on the floor hard, and then helped him up. Of course there might be some exaggeration.
Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy! Sorry to duplicate your post...this story was literally the first thing I thought of when I saw this video appear and posted before reading your comment. I was going to suggest that the guys try to get LeBell as a guest, then noticed he had sadly passed.
The chokeout part is false, but the foot sweep was indeed accurate according to Mr. Lambert. Keep in mind though, that Lambert also said Lebell didn't just get "hurt for an instant", but that Seagal made him go "flying back" from the hit. Seagal then arrogantly turned his back to Gene... which allowed Gene to get that nice leg sweep. Neither of them really "fought" each other. Conrad Palmisano was also there.
The mid 2000's. Seagal's early DTV crap. My Dad was a HUGE Seagal fan when I was growing up (Heck, I watched his early stuff back then even though I was too young and I still like those first 5 flicks). He kept watching the guy's movies even after this period of Seagal's career. It was like once or twice a year he'd come home from work and have another "Seagal 4 pack" of his most recent DTV trash that Blockbuster/Hollywood video was just looking to get rid of since no one was renting them. Daddy-o probably realized the man's modern movies are trash probably only as recently as 5 years ago.
@@JasonBrant I think he like that some other B-list and C-list actors that he recognized would still show up in them. I vaguely remember seeing Vinnie Jones in one of Seagal's DTV movies that I caught him watching several times back then.
The first 5 movie had great direction and great action.. after that his movies went to sh_t.. My mother loved this man's movies and still watched them until after *"Exit Wounds"* and after that she started to see his crappy sh_t as sub-par..
Funny story. My parents were at a Nancy Wilson acoustic show at McCabe's in santa monica like 15 yrs ago. Steven Seagal was there! He had bodyguards clear out the bathroom before he took a piss. I guess his ego needed some space.🤣
Not really an ego thing... it's more that he's paranoid as fuck because certain people tried to kill him in the past. That's why he's always weirdly got a bag of guns wherever he goes (cast members and interviewers mention this). He even had loaded conceal carry pistols and a bullet proof vest during scenes in Fire Down Below.
@@AztecUnshaven Seagal claims hes a reincarnated god, maybe the other bathroom patrons are beneath him while he pees out endless amounts of diet coke lol
19:55 While I believe Segal has enough mass to shatter a large wooden fence like that, I doubt he could achieve the necessary speed with out being fired from a cannon
The combo of shots with him doing his hand waves to the camera full screen followed by the crowd running away, I like to think that wasn't planned and they just ran from what they assumed was a giant puffy wizard.
That last decent flick Seagal made was Exit Wounds. I fully expect Seagal to continue regressing to such an extent that he gets main billing for a movie and his only appearance in-film is on the DVD box of Out for Justice that another character is holding.
I love Len Kabasinski. His movies are the essence of "so bad it's good". I swear each movie has something uniquely wrong with it: Dutch angle for the whole movie, nothing in focus in another, bad cgi flashes, etc. He's also pretty self aware and just makes movies for the delight of making movies. Very wholesome guy who just love martial arts.
You guys have been such an uplifting experience during some really hard times. Please never stop being you, always stay true to who you are because you have nothing but gold here.
That’s a flaccid suppressor! 😂 I’m cry laughing as usual. I get to hear word combos I never thought would be uttered. I love your channel so much. Thank you for going to 2 shows a week.
"This movie would be way better without Seagal." Truer words are rarely spoken. Although weirdly enough, it's followed up by "Seagal has never thrown a spin kick in his *HURR!* -ing life!" which is definitely on the same level.
Well well well I wake up from last night's alcohol adventure passed out in my backyard to immediately see my notification for some sweet, sweet making 23 years olds clearly uncomfortable Sifu Seagallllllll action. What a great weekend.
Just like Stevie boys acting, the body doubles are painfully horrible with minuscule amounts of effort to even make it somewhat believable. He always creeped me out, still does and even more so lol. You guys are great! Glad I found your channel. It’s mystery science theatre UA-cam edition.
"We will kill them within 76 hours." You know with the amount of time Seagal has already wasted in this movie talking to random people in clubs, 76 hours is not a lot of time for him. I'd be panicking.
Mr Segal we need to do a closeup now. Your stunt double is finished fighting. Are you kidding me? Just paint a goatee on that basketball and wake me when it’s time for lunch.
5:27 I'd hate to be the crew member that had to be pulling or pushing his ass across the floor. It was supposed to go quicker but that's as fast as they could go.
I don’t know why, but at 13:58 when he greets that monk I laughed so hard whilst I had a mouthful of Coca-Cola and I pretty much inhaled most of it, had a 10 minute coughing fit, recovered, then rewound to watch the vid from where I was and laughed at it again so I hard I nearly choked again, I think it’s the first time I’ve seen him do a fake happy face, just killed me 😂
I honestly fckin love the new upload schedule. I started with one video a few weeks ago, now I’m hooked. I’m slightly younger than you guys but I still remember seeing some of these movies being replayed on some cable stations (t.v. In the 90’s was wild) but maybe that’s why I like the vids so much. Seems like you’re branching out with sponsors as well, glad to see the channel grow. Thanks again for all the entertainment!
Quality Seagal action is from Above The Law to Exit Wounds they were mostly Warner Bros produced, this was a bad but fun movie, you guys summed it up perfectly in your hilarious reactions and no Seagal review ever misses "Waddle" which always cracks me up. Seagals DTV Urban Justice, Pistol Whipped, The Keeper and Driven To Kill are in the same league as this movie & are watchable hokum. I highly recommend you check out Tony Jaa Warrior King the guys batshit nuts & does all his own stunts it is a insane movie.
OMG! I just found this channel yesterday, and I HAVE to say, YOU FELLOWS RULE! So damn funny. Love to hear you guys pointing out all the "strategic" cuts et. al. used to stretch the... um... believability of all his narcissism. Keep up the laughs, SBIS.
You just know this movie is the result of Seagal seeing Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, and thinking he could do it better. It even has wire work in it.
“Sifu did not teach her any of his magic Kung Fu.” Women being allowed to look competent in a Seagal movie. Now we cannot have that can we. Steven says so.
Everyone should know that each Seagal movie will have a bunch of hilariously bad nonsense, his character having an "unexpectedly" hardcore background that no bad guy saw coming, and a couple of legitimately awesome moments that would've been incredible in a movie that made more sense.
20:15..If you like carefully at the front right edge of the trolley I believe you can catch a glimpse of the chain that is being used to pull the trolley along as he is shooting,it's in sight for just a split second so I could be wrong.
i have finally realise the skill of this great man. his method is to create a mess and allow the audience to ask questions till the end. realise how all what they do is ask questions and create their own stories. SIFU SEAGAL
I stumbled across this channel when going down the Seagal rabbit hole and, I have to say, I salute you lads for your dedication to this remarkable form of self-flagellation.
My best friend and I use to have a game in high school where we would see how many Steven Seagal movies we would find with him holding a gun on the cover....which we would eventually find out was all of them.
I didn't know you were an author. I looked it up online and you have several books published. I'm going to have to check them out sometime. I've been wanting to get back into reading. The "West of Hell" series looks very intriguing.
Use my code JASON5 to get $5 off your delicious, healthy Magic Spoon cereal by clicking this link: magicspoon.thld.co/jason5_0822
Newish movie on hulu, Suburban Gothic; horrid writing staring criminal minds Stars and Kat Dennings. Has to be a passion project of Mathew Grey Gubbler...please review.
When Dave took off the shirt in excitement I couldn't help but laugh my ass off!! 😂😂😂
Steven Seagull is so bad these days that he has hypnotized Dave into a fan of his..
@@vadiromsombra6832 I seen that! Oh my God is it bad.. I couldn't believe my eyes or ears watching that..
5:27
Super-Seagal
You'll believe a man can EAT
Yes the the birthday snatcher is Back I fucking love you guys! Holy cow you got magic spoon! I’m so happy for your channels growth .
"You don't abuse women in front of Seagal, that's HIS job."
Priceless.
Thanks 🤣
Np
are u kidding me,,,, this is honestly so fake,,, what the hell happened
@@alanmcmanus4040 why are you using commas as elipses
@@alanmcmanus4040 derp,,,,,,,derpy derp,,,, ,,,,,, ,,,,,
“Belly of the Beast”
Sounds like Seagal on a trip to the buffet.
🤣
LOL good one
lol
The buffet part sounds redundant in this case
Good to see you’re sharing your pain with new people.
But of course.
😂🤣👍🏻
I love how his stunt double is executing spinning kicks that only a master acrobat could dream of performing, while the real Steven Seagal is just half-heartedly flourishing and back slapping the other doubles in the market.
Director: "Cut! All right, that's a wrap for today. Literally. Steven, here's your six roasted lamb wraps and a wheelbarrow of cash for that scene."
Double: "What about me?"
Director: "You'll get your $300 when we finish shooting the movie, like everyone else! Stop asking or you're fired."
I wanted to laugh at the wrap joke, quality work, but it's just too real. People in the world get paid gigantic sums for what seems like little to no effort as is, but at least we usually don't WITNESS it. The idea of undeniably being the hardest working person in front of that camera by multiple orders of magnitude, only to see that 10lbs of lard stuffed into a 5lb bag sack of shit making /millions/ while I have a day rate that wouldn't cover rent in LA is just....*shudder*
At least it's Eastern Europe. Maybe it's National Lampoon's Erupean Vacation and $300 in Prague is like 45K in the States.
@@HotaruZokui know you were joking, but 300 bucks is one month's rent and utilities
Seeing Seifu doing a Wang Wang slide has unlocked the final achievement in my life. I can now die at peace.
It's an amazing shot 🤣
Now to see him do the umbrella trick
Super-Seagal: You'll believe a man can EAT.
😂😂😂😂
"Steven Seagal is embarrassing in this kung fu disaster"
Doesnt really narrow it down much.
And yet it's still a perfect description
I love hoe whenever Seagull interacts with a woman in any way you guys scream in horror, because I do the same.
hoe?
Because they know a storm of disgust is coming.
Yeah it’s just really creepy
Seagull loves hoe too!☻️
It creeps me out too, just imagine if your daughter was in one of his movies and how you'd feel about it, any dad who let's his daughter in a Seagal should hav parental rights taken away
And now I’m wondering if the people who made this just handed him a script that was titled ”the Beast“ and as soon as they were in post they just slapped ”Belly of“ in front of it. Kind like China made him lose to Tyson by just filming the fight without him there.
I love this idea.
he thought it said 'Feast'
funfact most of the movies seagal is in...
he "wrote"
@@MichelLinschoten I was going to say I saw a interview with someone. He goes Seagal said i just read the best script ever to be written. The guy said who wrote it and he responded I did 😂.
@@SavageFrenchies I believe that was Rob Schneider.
*Edit: I co-sign your username.
I loved it when you guys said Seagal did that roll himself. He can still do rolls...they're just jelly rolls...lots and lots of jelly roles.
Maybe a few dinner rolls as well!
don't forget chin rolls
a few cinnamon rolls too, and butter rolls... donuts... pizza... barbeque
Sausage rolls too
The best thing about these Seagal movies is that I think he genuinely believes he's doing this stuff for real. It's pathetic and sad, but also hilarious.
It's his "special" way of playing pretend
‘One of these days we will watch a segal movie we like’
‘WHY?’
Comedy gold right there lol
The Asian Voodoo priest having a totally useless psychic magic war with a temple full of monks was a hilarious touch.
Class - I was in Bangkok when this was being filmed and saw sensei seagull in the flesh...the waddle was present in 2003...I'm proud to say I still haven't bothered my hole to watch it
You saw the waddle in person? You poor SOB.
''Be with the turds.'' Ok, I cracked there.
I paused at the first 40 seconds and we already have:
- A new acolyte condemned to watch bad movies with you;
- Brian's love for Doom turning into a dedicated movie shirt;
- Erin's happiness with the new sponsor;
- A Seagal movie.
I mean, this episode JUST CAN'T go wrong.
The director/choreographer is Ching Siu-Tung, who is an absolute Hong Kong legend. If you want to absolutely lose your mind, I recommend A Chinese Ghost Story and Jet Li's Swordsman II.
His action stuff is always fun even if the film is less than stellar.
Have you watched any of earlier Seagal yet? He had a string of genuinely decent to great ones from Above the Law in 1988 until Executive Decision in 1996. Then it gets REAL dicey.
Seagal seemed to be a little open in the early 2000s for experimentation as he also did Exit Wounds with DMX.Same director as the Jet Li/DMX film Cradle 2 the Grave. He does WIREWORK in that one! (well, his double does, but possibly him for a little bit too). There's some hilarious stories from that set by Tom Arnold. Seagal went out the wrong door on a boat and went straight into a river :D
The new schedule is awesome. It's also nice seeing you guys make your other friends suffer with you.
Gotta share the horror with others.
The poor women in these movies are scarred for life, every time they smell cookies they'll have a flashback of the whole traumatizing experience.
Cookies, fast food, milkshakes, ketchup that was left out of the fridge for too long, there’s just so many things to remind them of Sensei Seagal!
LOVING the new 2 shows a week schedule!! Thx y'all
Thanks! It's a lot of work, but hopefully it pays off.
@@JasonBrant As long as you sincerely have a good time and your livers can take the additional session, there‘s no way this won‘t pay off
You guys have had great chemistry since day one, it passes on to the viewer 👍🏽🔥
Yes now Thursday and Sunday!!!!! Amaze balls ⚽️ 🏀 🏈
@@JasonBrant I can imagine all the extra stuff adds up pretty quick, but I hope that having a chance to watch a sort of palate cleanser before/after a Sifu film helps out.
same here!
"Are you gonna die a horrible painful death?"
"Better than watching the rest of this movie."
Brutal.
4:12 Seagals distorted face on his t-shirt loool 😭😭🤣🤣
🤣
Great to see you guys sharing Sifu Seagull's knowledge with new people 👌
Gotta spread the misery around.
The master or Bullshitto himself.
And he's also Putin's pal.
4:40 - Holy shit! That's no ordinary kung fu choreographer, that's Ching Siu-tung! He's one of the greatest action choreographers and action film directors in Hong Kong, ever. But not even his name on this will make me watch it.
Dang, he directed it too. Well, everyone has some stinkers on their CV.
A new guest, plus a decent Steven Seagal movie (if I may say so - or at least my child-self was entertained by this movie at the time)? Nice!
Had to torture him with a Seagal movie.
@@JasonBrant I propose that trial by Waddling Seagal movies be an initiation for anyone new you bring in.
@@DiscoFinalBoss YES!
@@JasonBrant I think the lesson to be learned here, is that all goateed-Seagal films are torture. Well, next time!
5:25 Good to see Sifu on the other side of the same pulley system he used to rescue Spinal Injury Man(tm) during Sniper Special Flops
🤣 🤣
Seagal now Russia ambassador in Ukraine. Wish he had a camera crew filming live. Can’t imagine his Russian accent
🤣 🤣
To think of all the resources the Russian Army had to waste to get him to Crimea. The half-track to carry his ass...the platoon of conscripts that had to carry after his ankles give out...a battalion's worth of 20 year old MRE's eaten in a day.
Did he up the bounty offered for freezing Zelinsky in carbonite?
Seagal will achieve peace in Ukraine - just like Stallone's climactic speech in Rocky 4 was the end of Soviet communism.
Him saying "that's why they rocketed" while mumbling through that place was just... Chefs kiss!
Still didn't stop Zelensky from taking back Kherson and getting closer to Crimea.
Slava Ukraini!
I love how much I learn watching these videos. Who knew that in the time it takes for someone to shoot an arrow one can run to a pair a swords across the room, unsheathe one, and be ready to fight before the arrow finishes its journey? Seagal truly is a master of his craft.
What do you mean? He's super Sensei Steven Segal! It's basic stuff for him...;)
Sifu has superhuman speed and reflexes.
5:22 look at the difference in the forearms between his stunt double landing and Seagal’s flabby forearms at 5:47. lmao
20:35 is hysterical
Brant:
“They literally put him on a cart and pushed him. Action scene!”
Blue-shirt Buddy:
:::fat guy impression::: “ok, go”
I've noticed after every seagal movie the guys have fits of rage that make this worth watching. Not the dumpster of a "film" they're watching but the pure disdain they feel during and after just gets me every time
24:30 Seagal's character is probably thinking "If I can't save my daughter at least I can try and replace her by getting this lady pregnant."
And the actress is probably thinking "Can we get Steven's stunt double in here?"
Nice!
@@JasonBrant I don't know how you guys get through Sea Food's sex scenes with just beer.
You guys always make me laugh when I come here. The 5:28 ninja slide was amazing. Seagal just being dragged past a window. 🤣😂
In the 90s I loved Segal’s movies SO much, I’ll never forget four of us (2 of us literally) rolling around laughing at that deli scene that was hilariously violent as we rewound and watched it multiple times.
Now I can’t enjoy them knowing what he was like to his costars.
If only he was humble and funny and not a narcissistic sociopath.
Those 90s movies were so freaking awesomely funny. I miss them. Gol dang it.
I still enjoy it 💯
The man walks with an air of confidence rarely seen in this day and age
As Gene LeBell passed away this week, here is something you may enjoy.
During the making of the film “Out for Justice” starring Steven Segal, Segal would brag to people that with his aikido training, nobody could choke him out. As the story goes, he told LeBell, then 58, “Old man, these guys are saying you could choke me out.” LeBell is said to have responded, “I’ve been around since the Last Supper. I’m so old, my first movie was Birth of a Nation. But I could choke you out. Yeah.”
The story always told, that LeBell would coyly indicate was true but never fully say, is that LeBell then choked him out and Seagal lost control of his bowels. Seagal denied the incident ever took place, and said LeBell was a “sick, pathalogical scumbag liar.”
Steven Lambert, a stuntman, said he was there for the confrontation. His description was that Seagal told LeBell that his choke wouldn’t work on him. LeBell went to put him in the choke, but before locking it on, Seagal threw a forearm to LeBell’s balls. LeBell’s version of the story did include the forearm to the balls. Seagal had a reputation in movies for beating up stunt men and giving them low blows. Lambert said that the low blow hurt LeBell for an instant, but he quickly used a foot sweep and threw Seagal on the floor hard, and then helped him up.
Of course there might be some exaggeration.
Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy!
Sorry to duplicate your post...this story was literally the first thing I thought of when I saw this video appear and posted before reading your comment.
I was going to suggest that the guys try to get LeBell as a guest, then noticed he had sadly passed.
R.I.P.
(21 phased-plasma cannon salute from the Decepticon Army)
The chokeout part is false, but the foot sweep was indeed accurate according to Mr. Lambert. Keep in mind though, that Lambert also said Lebell didn't just get "hurt for an instant", but that Seagal made him go "flying back" from the hit. Seagal then arrogantly turned his back to Gene... which allowed Gene to get that nice leg sweep.
Neither of them really "fought" each other. Conrad Palmisano was also there.
@@AztecUnshaven cool, thank you for adding and clarifying, you do never know how exaggerated Hollywood stories can get
RIP Gene.
The mid 2000's. Seagal's early DTV crap. My Dad was a HUGE Seagal fan when I was growing up (Heck, I watched his early stuff back then even though I was too young and I still like those first 5 flicks). He kept watching the guy's movies even after this period of Seagal's career. It was like once or twice a year he'd come home from work and have another "Seagal 4 pack" of his most recent DTV trash that Blockbuster/Hollywood video was just looking to get rid of since no one was renting them. Daddy-o probably realized the man's modern movies are trash probably only as recently as 5 years ago.
He was still digging this stuff? Damn.
@@JasonBrant I think he like that some other B-list and C-list actors that he recognized would still show up in them. I vaguely remember seeing Vinnie Jones in one of Seagal's DTV movies that I caught him watching several times back then.
Submerged - we reviewed that a few months ago.
The first 5 movie had great direction and great action.. after that his movies went to sh_t.. My mother loved this man's movies and still watched them until after *"Exit Wounds"* and after that she started to see his crappy sh_t as sub-par..
its wild that Seagal's work quickly went to crap while Van Damme was somehow becoming a better actor and putting out decent stuff
In Steven seagull we trust ….. love watching your videos
Thanks!
14:07 Like he's 90... 🤣🤣🤣
Funny story. My parents were at a Nancy Wilson acoustic show at McCabe's in santa monica like 15 yrs ago. Steven Seagal was there! He had bodyguards clear out the bathroom before he took a piss. I guess his ego needed some space.🤣
Takes him some time to find his equipment.
Not really an ego thing... it's more that he's paranoid as fuck because certain people tried to kill him in the past. That's why he's always weirdly got a bag of guns wherever he goes (cast members and interviewers mention this). He even had loaded conceal carry pistols and a bullet proof vest during scenes in Fire Down Below.
@@JasonBrant Must be hard to find with his Grotesque master martials artists gut lol
@@AztecUnshaven Seagal claims hes a reincarnated god, maybe the other bathroom patrons are beneath him while he pees out endless amounts of diet coke lol
@@nebulous8389 that's not what a Tulku is lol.
19:55 While I believe Segal has enough mass to shatter a large wooden fence like that, I doubt he could achieve the necessary speed with out being fired from a cannon
What's also amazing is he knows there were three guys in that exact spot when he did so, like he has an inbuilt Call of Duty radar.
The combo of shots with him doing his hand waves to the camera full screen followed by the crowd running away, I like to think that wasn't planned and they just ran from what they assumed was a giant puffy wizard.
That last decent flick Seagal made was Exit Wounds. I fully expect Seagal to continue regressing to such an extent that he gets main billing for a movie and his only appearance in-film is on the DVD box of Out for Justice that another character is holding.
I love Len Kabasinski.
His movies are the essence of "so bad it's good". I swear each movie has something uniquely wrong with it: Dutch angle for the whole movie, nothing in focus in another, bad cgi flashes, etc. He's also pretty self aware and just makes movies for the delight of making movies. Very wholesome guy who just love martial arts.
Definetely Good Bad. I was laughing my a☆☆ off at the end(lost it when the bad guy got speared)!😂
You guys have been such an uplifting experience during some really hard times. Please never stop being you, always stay true to who you are because you have nothing but gold here.
Gotta say, for me this was the funniest episode. I almost cried laughing. 😂
Seagal sliding in at the start had me thinking he was looking for upskirts 👀
That’s a flaccid suppressor! 😂 I’m cry laughing as usual. I get to hear word combos I never thought would be uttered. I love your channel so much. Thank you for going to 2 shows a week.
Thanks, James!
"We gotta resolve this without harm to the young girls or the reputation of the United States."
Haha, that's funny as fuck.
"This movie would be way better without Seagal."
Truer words are rarely spoken.
Although weirdly enough, it's followed up by "Seagal has never thrown a spin kick in his *HURR!* -ing life!" which is definitely on the same level.
Well well well I wake up from last night's alcohol adventure passed out in my backyard to immediately see my notification for some sweet, sweet making 23 years olds clearly uncomfortable Sifu Seagallllllll action. What a great weekend.
The molestation er I mean love scenes "Kill it with beer!"😂😂
24:27 I love how Aaron just up and dips during the sex scene, can't say I blame him though LOL.
Seagal has to be cooking in those long sleeves and jackets. Probably smelled like a bucket of hot dogs left in a trunk for a week.
Just like Stevie boys acting, the body doubles are painfully horrible with minuscule amounts of effort to even make it somewhat believable.
He always creeped me out, still does and even more so lol. You guys are great! Glad I found your channel. It’s mystery science theatre UA-cam edition.
“Someone’s gonna get it while I’m eating this food”… 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
Magic Spoon!- where the serving size is 1/4 cup and every serving equals the price of an entire box of the other magicless spooned brands
These SBIG videos, especially on Segal's movies, are solid gold.
I forgot how good this movie was. Those early 2000 straight to video seagal flicks were ambitious.
Good... for a Seagal movie.
The early DTV era Seagal was decent at best.
Danke!
For the next beer budget!😘
Wow. That's incredibly generous of you. Thanks so much!
"We will kill them within 76 hours."
You know with the amount of time Seagal has already wasted in this movie talking to random people in clubs, 76 hours is not a lot of time for him. I'd be panicking.
Good point. Doesn't give him much time to feel up random women.
Or banging a hot Thai woman.
Told my mom I want to be Steven Seagal when I was 7! My foster parents have accepted my decision now
Magic spoon is bomb. Definitely going to use your discount next time I order.
Love your videos. Especially the ones where you make fun of Segal.
Thanks so much! It helps a lot when you use the link or code. And yeah, their cereal is amazing.
Any episode of you guys clowning on Sifu Seagull films has become my go-to comfort vid before I go to sleep.
Ya know, it is an absolute tragedy that no one has ever made a Sifu action figure.
Mr Segal we need to do a closeup now. Your stunt double is finished fighting.
Are you kidding me? Just paint a goatee on that basketball and wake me when it’s time for lunch.
5:27 I'd hate to be the crew member that had to be pulling or pushing his ass across the floor. It was supposed to go quicker but that's as fast as they could go.
🤣
I don’t know why, but at 13:58 when he greets that monk I laughed so hard whilst I had a mouthful of Coca-Cola and I pretty much inhaled most of it, had a 10 minute coughing fit, recovered, then rewound to watch the vid from where I was and laughed at it again so I hard I nearly choked again, I think it’s the first time I’ve seen him do a fake happy face, just killed me 😂
Welcome Aaron! You are an awesome addition to the team
I'll tell him you said that. Thanks!
One of Seagal's daughters is a Japanese actress who was in three Gamera films: Ayako Fujitani.
She was in the seagal movie the patriot in a cameo too
OMG!!!! Guys, you just keep on delivering awesome stuff!!! God, I love your channel!!! Nobody does funny reviews on horrible movies better than you!
Thanks so much!
@@JasonBrant You're more than welcome!!! Looking forward to seeing some great stuff from you)))
I honestly fckin love the new upload schedule. I started with one video a few weeks ago, now I’m hooked. I’m slightly younger than you guys but I still remember seeing some of these movies being replayed on some cable stations (t.v. In the 90’s was wild) but maybe that’s why I like the vids so much.
Seems like you’re branching out with sponsors as well, glad to see the channel grow.
Thanks again for all the entertainment!
Quality Seagal action is from Above The Law to Exit Wounds they were mostly Warner Bros produced, this was a bad but fun movie, you guys summed it up perfectly in your hilarious reactions and no Seagal review ever misses "Waddle" which always cracks me up.
Seagals DTV Urban Justice, Pistol Whipped, The Keeper and Driven To Kill are in the same league as this movie & are watchable hokum.
I highly recommend you check out Tony Jaa Warrior King the guys batshit nuts & does all his own stunts it is a insane movie.
OMG! I just found this channel yesterday, and I HAVE to say, YOU FELLOWS RULE! So damn funny. Love to hear you guys pointing out all the "strategic" cuts et. al. used to stretch the... um... believability of all his narcissism. Keep up the laughs, SBIS.
The Jasonverse is expanding. I'm all for it if it can get us a 3 person panel more often.
Watching Sifu fight a Thai Lady Boy: Things I needed in life, but didn't know I needed.
You just know this movie is the result of Seagal seeing Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, and thinking he could do it better. It even has wire work in it.
38:56 “Be with the turds” oh Lord ROFL 🤣 😂😂
Love when you guys roast Steven Seagal movies
Thanks!
Sunday mornings are great mornings. Thanks Jason and Crew.
Much appreciated!
“Sifu did not teach her any of his magic Kung Fu.”
Women being allowed to look competent in a Seagal movie. Now we cannot have that can we. Steven says so.
to be fair, Seagal has taught some high level female black belts back in the day in real life.
Shit - fair point.
The Mike Tyson one nearly killed me .this was Citizen Kane compared to that to that effort lol
That slide was epic🤣🤣
Everyone should know that each Seagal movie will have a bunch of hilariously bad nonsense, his character having an "unexpectedly" hardcore background that no bad guy saw coming, and a couple of legitimately awesome moments that would've been incredible in a movie that made more sense.
I just watched it and at the end I was howling with laughter!😆
BELLY of the Beast. What a fitting name!
So perfect.
20:15..If you like carefully at the front right edge of the trolley I believe you can catch a glimpse of the chain that is being used to pull the trolley along as he is shooting,it's in sight for just a split second so I could be wrong.
i have finally realise the skill of this great man. his method is to create a mess and allow the audience to ask questions till the end. realise how all what they do is ask questions and create their own stories. SIFU SEAGAL
I stumbled across this channel when going down the Seagal rabbit hole and, I have to say, I salute you lads for your dedication to this remarkable form of self-flagellation.
Laughing at Steven Seagal? Day is made!
🤣
9:29 this stunt guy just couldn't stop laughing
Heavin' Steven's back with another direct-to-dumpster release.
🤣
My best friend and I use to have a game in high school where we would see how many Steven Seagal movies we would find with him holding a gun on the cover....which we would eventually find out was all of them.
I didn't know you were an author. I looked it up online and you have several books published. I'm going to have to check them out sometime. I've been wanting to get back into reading. The "West of Hell" series looks very intriguing.
Thank you guys for being so hilarious and making a normally painful seagal flick less painfull!!
Belly of the beast would be a good name for a Steven Seagal biopic.
🤣 🤣
11:33. Oh my god! He put his all into that line like he drew from the wellspring of life itself! Bravo!
yay!
heatwave afternoon viewing!
and boy, what a belly.
How it is it where you are?
@@JasonBrant midlands in the Uk 33c /91f humidity 28% worse in south lot of rivers totally drying up ,but defo time for a fine ale.
Later that night that railroad cart quietly sobbed in the darkness while all the other carts sat around the fire smoking cigs and laughing at it.