Take care of yourself Charlie. You need time to process what has happened. Losing a parent is never easy. You are so fortunate to a have a wonderful husband and family around you. Even cuddling those darling pups is a comfort. xx
Charlie, you are a very courageous and brave lady to share such personal information and emotions with us. It sounds like your parents relationship was an incredible and intensive romantic tragedy. Continue to stay strong, you have a beautiful family around you to support you in this difficult period. Hopefully in time, you will be able to focus on the good and happy times with your parents. Xxx. Ps so tempted with Pip too!
Aww Charlie it’s so hard when a parent dies - and I think one grieves for their loss and the loss of the childhood you didn’t have - often can feel were cheated out of …it is sad , hang in there. Only wear waterproof mascara for a while xxx
Oh Charlie so sorry to hear of your loss but thank you as always to share and open your heart to all of us. You are very brave and clearly a difficult time for you all. How right you are you don’t choose your family but you do your friends. It is our friends that come up trumps so often. We went through such a difficult time last year and it was friends that helped us pull through and offered so much practical support as well not just words! Take care and see you again when you can. Will I hope soon join a zoom call with the Members club xx
Charlie thankyou for being so brave and sharing this week with us. I lost my father a few years ago and I was the one who had to do all the organising, decision making and admin. It is alot. Be kind to yourself and keep your loved ones close. This season will pass and when you are ready you will be back feeling yourself once more. Sending you lots of love 💖
I've only just got around to watching this and the first 15 minutes really moved me. I am sending you so much love and strength during this difficult time. Your vulnerability and raw emotion are incredibly powerful. Thank you for showing up and sharing your heart despite the pain you're going through. It takes immense courage, please know you and your family are in my prayers. I hope that visiting his home went okay. Can't imagine how difficult that could have been. You are so so brave. Remember, you're not alone, and there's a community here supporting you. Take care of yourself. 💔🌈
Charlie, so brave of you to share your week with us all xx.Like you said, being a grown up really does suck sometimes. You are doing amazing, it is so so hard especially with the relationship you had with your father xx. You are doing what’s best for you, just keep,doing that xx. Take care and sending much love to you all ❤❤
I can empathize with you, my Dad died on Jan 19th. Grief has visited me so many times, unexpectedly, at the most unexpected times...it's OK. You have to let it come, experience whatever it has to bring...it's part of healing I believe. Much love and hugs...
I think the reason why you have a staunch community on UA-cam is because you are very normal and we love you sharing ,the good the bad and the downright difficult ! …..❤
Do take care Charlie you have a lot on your plate at present. Talk all you want as best not to bottle things up. Remember the only way is up. Big hugs x
Charlie you are absolutely right that grieving can be so complicated when your relationship with those that were difficult in life leave you with so many unresolved feelings when they die. I know this firsthand having experienced it myself. The hope that things could be better ends when they are gone and you are left to pick up the pieces. You seem to have a very healthy way about you despite what you have been through. My heart goes out to you, but you will get through. Thank you for putting yourself out there, you are an inspiration❤
Oh Charlie, i'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your father and that you're going through other tough stuff too. You will, in time get through this period of your life and you will come out the other side with fond memories of your father. In the meantime your grief will come in waves and you can't fight it, just allow the emotions to come out when they surface and just keep talking. xx
Ah bless you. My mother died very recently, we had a very complicated relationship, and yes the grieving process is hard. Like yourself I was the only one to sort out the ‘stuff’ and I also have a wonderful supportive husband. Remember “ Joy comes in the morning”……. Also jolly bad luck with Santana after all your hard work.
Sorry to hear your news, in my experience the grief that we feel on the death of a family member can often be grief for what could or should have been, as well as what is. (I have also tackled a similar house and smile to myself when I see it now, knowing that the current occupants couldn’t possibly imagine how it used to look!) I’m sure that, with Sigh’s help, you managed to do what needed to be done. Your vlog will have resonated with many viewers, a generous thing to do.
As a counsellor myself I’d sa for following through with your boundaries AND upping you self care. Totally essential with the traumatic background with your dad you’ve shared 👏
So sorry to hear about your father Charlie, it sounds like a very difficult situation. I must say I do love your vlogs because they feel like real life and you share all the ups and downs, so thank you for coming back with a vlog this week x
Hi Charlie, so sorry to hear the sad news about your father passing but now he will be at peace. Do take care of yourself and you are surrounded by love. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers xx
Hi Charlie. Thank you for being so brave in exposing / sharing your very personal past and present experiences, it’s been very helpful for me. Please eat well and look after yourself so you stay strong, versatile and resilient - for others. Having time to appreciate the simple things is the best, enjoy when you can! Tea is good 👍🏼 so is that stiff drink at the end of the day 😘
Charlie, sounds like you have a lot on your plate and you’ve got quite a bit to do yet. Take time and take care of yourself. Glad you have a wonderful therapist since you still have a lot to get through yet. You are in my prayers for strength and support. Virgin River is wonderful! I loved that series. I was so surprised when they had 2 episodes this past Christmas.
I lost my father on New Year's Eve just gone Charlie. We were incredibly close and trying to find the time and space to grieve while juggling family and work is so difficult. Doing that with additional complications and emotions resulting from your relationship with your father must be so much more demanding so I really feel for you. All I can say is time and self care. Be kind to yourself, there is no rush to process things but allow yourself the opportunity to sit with your feelings and emotions, whatever they may be.
Bless you, Jesus heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds when we give our lives to him. You are such a sweet lady and you are a rock for your family. Tragedy is part of life sometimes and we need each other.
So very sorry for your loss. Please give yourself plenty of time to heal and take extra special care of yourself as you come to terms. Sending best wishes to your family. xx
Please accept my deepest condolences for your loss... as well as from the constant loss you have been suffering and rising from, all these years!!! What an inspiration you are to me. I have been through similar things, and it does my heart good to see how beautifully you have been moving in healthy and nurturing directions. I sincerely believe, that now, if your dear parents can see you from the other side, they would be immensely proud of you!!!
Brave girl! Most of us lose a parent(s) in their life and this blog may really help those who have. I've lost one parent and about to lose the other and it is not easy. I hope the funeral went as well as it could. Thanks for blogging and allowing us to be a part of this journey with you. Sending a virtual hug
Awww am so sorry to hear of your loss.... a difficult time.... I can understand the house clearing trauma.... my father in law is 92, is partially blind, lives in a 5 bedroom house and is a horder too..... he is also fiercely independent and wont accept any help... so I am not looking forward that when it comes. Anyway sending big hugs. ❤
I always feel bad for people who are close to parents who die because I'm not close to my father at all and I wish I could say "please take mine instead, literally no one will miss him." I know it sounds harsh but he's honestly absolutely vile, even his own parents loathed him, and he's managed to alienate all four of his children, and he hasn't got a single friend. Life can seem very unfair at times but you have to make the best of it and keep going and it sounds like you might have some positive memories to cherish too.
So many condolences to you Charlie. I have only recently discovered your channel & am enjoying your old vlogs. I watched the one before Xmas when you talked about your father & nearly commented then, but feel compelled to now as I want you to know how helpful it has been to hear you share your experience. I too had a very difficult father, probably of a similar generation, who was pretty much unfulfilled & frustrated all his life. He was given to irrational bouts of anger, found relationships both with his family & outsiders very difficult, he fell out with everybody. My mother died too young at 64, largely as a result I believe of the stress of living with my father & constantly trying to keep the peace. It is only recently that I have acknowledged the trauma that this caused myself & my brothers. I feel your experience sounds much worse but it definately resonates with me. Luckily I had a much better relationship with my father in later years for which I am grateful. Do look after yourself, get as much help as you need. Sending lots of love, and thanks for your openness & honesty ❤️ Ps I used to live in Midhurst (now in E Wittering), so I know that back road through Woolbeding - nightmare at the best of times!
This was a very brave blog Charlie & personally very helpful so thank you very much for sharing your bad times along with the good. It is very much real life. I discovered Virgin River last year & it got me through the chesty/ fluey so many of us had around Christmas. Hopefully it will stop raining eventually, proper spring will arrive & you will start to recover. With love xxx
Hi Charlie.Sorry to hear the news about your father,hang on in there,things will improve. Why not try taking Savannah out for short distances and riding her straight home before she has time to get upset.I know it’s a long haul and never any good getting angry or you have to start all over again from scratch.I had a horse years ago who could be very good or a total pain loading and he wasn’t frightened,just very obstinate,whereas your girl does seem genuinely frightened.Maybe a lorry would be worth considering.Many horses load better and you could take Colin as a travel friend.Good luck.
You could load Santana on a day with no expectations. Drive her somewhere you could unload her, allow her to graze in hand for a while, load her back up and take her home. Do that a few times. Then load her, take her somewhere , tack her up, untack her, take her home. The more she equates a ride in the trailer with non stressful events, the more she' all calm down. She's only 5, and just had a traumatic travel experience with the vet. You .ah need to take so.e steps back before progress is made.
Take care of yourself Charlie. You need time to process what has happened. Losing a parent is never easy. You are so fortunate to a have a wonderful husband and family around you. Even cuddling those darling pups is a comfort. xx
How beautifully put x
Charlie, you are a very courageous and brave lady to share such personal information and emotions with us. It sounds like your parents relationship was an incredible and intensive romantic tragedy. Continue to stay strong, you have a beautiful family around you to support you in this difficult period. Hopefully in time, you will be able to focus on the good and happy times with your parents. Xxx. Ps so tempted with Pip too!
Aww Charlie it’s so hard when a parent dies - and I think one grieves for their loss and the loss of the childhood you didn’t have - often can feel were cheated out of …it is sad , hang in there. Only wear waterproof mascara for a while xxx
Thank you x
Oh Charlie so sorry to hear of your loss but thank you as always to share and open your heart to all of us. You are very brave and clearly a difficult time for you all. How right you are you don’t choose your family but you do your friends. It is our friends that come up trumps so often. We went through such a difficult time last year and it was friends that helped us pull through and offered so much practical support as well not just words! Take care and see you again when you can. Will I hope soon join a zoom call with the Members club xx
Charlie thankyou for being so brave and sharing this week with us. I lost my father a few years ago and I was the one who had to do all the organising, decision making and admin. It is alot. Be kind to yourself and keep your loved ones close. This season will pass and when you are ready you will be back feeling yourself once more. Sending you lots of love 💖
❤ Thank you, you've really helped! Your so honest, brave and really thoughtful. Keep being kind to yourself. Thank you ❤
Dear Charlie, I am sorry to hear about your loss and am sending love to you and your family.
I've only just got around to watching this and the first 15 minutes really moved me. I am sending you so much love and strength during this difficult time. Your vulnerability and raw emotion are incredibly powerful. Thank you for showing up and sharing your heart despite the pain you're going through. It takes immense courage, please know you and your family are in my prayers. I hope that visiting his home went okay. Can't imagine how difficult that could have been. You are so so brave. Remember, you're not alone, and there's a community here supporting you. Take care of yourself. 💔🌈
Charlie, so brave of you to share your week with us all xx.Like you said, being a grown up really does suck sometimes. You are doing amazing, it is so so hard especially with the relationship you had with your father xx. You are doing what’s best for you, just keep,doing that xx. Take care and sending much love to you all ❤❤
I can empathize with you, my Dad died on Jan 19th. Grief has visited me so many times, unexpectedly, at the most unexpected times...it's OK. You have to let it come, experience whatever it has to bring...it's part of healing I believe. Much love and hugs...
Praying for you and your family ❤
Sending you lots of love, as always you are open and honest which is more helpful than you realise. 😘 xx
Sincerest condolences to you Charlie on the sad loss of you Dad ……you are blessed with Simon ,your children and love from family and friends. …..❤
I think the reason why you have a staunch community on UA-cam is because you are very normal and we love you sharing ,the good the bad and the downright difficult ! …..❤
Do take care Charlie you have a lot on your plate at present. Talk all you want as best not to bottle things up. Remember the only way is up. Big hugs x
Charlie you are absolutely right that grieving can be so complicated when your relationship with those that were difficult in life leave you with so many unresolved feelings when they die. I know this firsthand having experienced it myself. The hope that things could be better ends when they are gone and you are left to pick up the pieces. You seem to have a very healthy way about you despite what you have been through. My heart goes out to you, but you will get through. Thank you for putting yourself out there, you are an inspiration❤
I so admire your courage for sharing your emotions! Stay strong and look after yourself! ❤❤❤
Oh Charlie, i'm so sorry to hear about the passing of your father and that you're going through other tough stuff too. You will, in time get through this period of your life and you will come out the other side with fond memories of your father. In the meantime your grief will come in waves and you can't fight it, just allow the emotions to come out when they surface and just keep talking. xx
Ah bless you. My mother died very recently, we had a very complicated relationship, and yes the grieving process is hard. Like yourself I was the only one to sort out the ‘stuff’ and I also have a wonderful supportive husband. Remember “ Joy comes in the morning”……. Also jolly bad luck with Santana after all your hard work.
Sorry to hear your news, in my experience the grief that we feel on the death of a family member can often be grief for what could or should have been, as well as what is. (I have also tackled a similar house and smile to myself when I see it now, knowing that the current occupants couldn’t possibly imagine how it used to look!) I’m sure that, with Sigh’s help, you managed to do what needed to be done. Your vlog will have resonated with many viewers, a generous thing to do.
Charlie I am sending you a massive hug you have done so well my thoughts are with you xxxxxxx
As a counsellor myself I’d sa for following through with your boundaries AND upping you self care. Totally essential with the traumatic background with your dad you’ve shared 👏
So sorry to hear about your father Charlie, it sounds like a very difficult situation. I must say I do love your vlogs because they feel like real life and you share all the ups and downs, so thank you for coming back with a vlog this week x
Hi Charlie, so sorry to hear the sad news about your father passing but now he will be at peace. Do take care of yourself and you are surrounded by love. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers xx
Hi Charlie. Thank you for being so brave in exposing / sharing your very personal past and present experiences, it’s been very helpful for me. Please eat well and look after yourself so you stay strong, versatile and resilient - for others. Having time to appreciate the simple things is the best, enjoy when you can! Tea is good 👍🏼 so is that stiff drink at the end of the day 😘
Charlie, sounds like you have a lot on your plate and you’ve got quite a bit to do yet. Take time and take care of yourself. Glad you have a wonderful therapist since you still have a lot to get through yet. You are in my prayers for strength and support.
Virgin River is wonderful! I loved that series. I was so surprised when they had 2 episodes this past Christmas.
I lost my father on New Year's Eve just gone Charlie. We were incredibly close and trying to find the time and space to grieve while juggling family and work is so difficult. Doing that with additional complications and emotions resulting from your relationship with your father must be so much more demanding so I really feel for you. All I can say is time and self care. Be kind to yourself, there is no rush to process things but allow yourself the opportunity to sit with your feelings and emotions, whatever they may be.
Bless you, Jesus heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds when we give our lives to him. You are such a sweet lady and you are a rock for your family. Tragedy is part of life sometimes and we need each other.
Really honest - life can be shit even when you have alot of 💰 and privilege. You are a very resilient woman 🙌
So very sorry for your loss. Please give yourself plenty of time to heal and take extra special care of yourself as you come to terms. Sending best wishes to your family. xx
Please accept my deepest condolences for your loss... as well as from the constant loss you have been suffering and rising from, all these years!!! What an inspiration you are to me. I have been through similar things, and it does my heart good to see how beautifully you have been moving in healthy and nurturing directions. I sincerely believe, that now, if your dear parents can see you from the other side, they would be immensely proud of you!!!
Brave girl! Most of us lose a parent(s) in their life and this blog may really help those who have. I've lost one parent and about to lose the other and it is not easy. I hope the funeral went as well as it could. Thanks for blogging and allowing us to be a part of this journey with you. Sending a virtual hug
I’m so sorrry for your loss Charlie ❤️🌷
Awww am so sorry to hear of your loss.... a difficult time.... I can understand the house clearing trauma.... my father in law is 92, is partially blind, lives in a 5 bedroom house and is a horder too..... he is also fiercely independent and wont accept any help... so I am not looking forward that when it comes. Anyway sending big hugs. ❤
I always feel bad for people who are close to parents who die because I'm not close to my father at all and I wish I could say "please take mine instead, literally no one will miss him." I know it sounds harsh but he's honestly absolutely vile, even his own parents loathed him, and he's managed to alienate all four of his children, and he hasn't got a single friend. Life can seem very unfair at times but you have to make the best of it and keep going and it sounds like you might have some positive memories to cherish too.
Thank you for sharing Charlie. Thinking of you and your family x
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, incredibly brave and inspirational. Sending you strength and prayers xxx
So many condolences to you Charlie. I have only recently discovered your channel & am enjoying your old vlogs. I watched the one before Xmas when you talked about your father & nearly commented then, but feel compelled to now as I want you to know how helpful it has been to hear you share your experience. I too had a very difficult father, probably of a similar generation, who was pretty much unfulfilled & frustrated all his life. He was given to irrational bouts of anger, found relationships both with his family & outsiders very difficult, he fell out with everybody. My mother died too young at 64, largely as a result I believe of the stress of living with my father & constantly trying to keep the peace. It is only recently that I have acknowledged the trauma that this caused myself & my brothers. I feel your experience sounds much worse but it definately resonates with me. Luckily I had a much better relationship with my father in later years for which I am grateful. Do look after yourself, get as much help as you need. Sending lots of love, and thanks for your openness & honesty ❤️
Ps I used to live in Midhurst (now in E Wittering), so I know that back road through Woolbeding - nightmare at the best of times!
Sending you so much love and healing. Xx
This was a very brave blog Charlie & personally very helpful so thank you very much for sharing your bad times along with the good. It is very much real life. I discovered Virgin River last year & it got me through the chesty/ fluey so many of us had around Christmas. Hopefully it will stop raining eventually, proper spring will arrive & you will start to recover. With love xxx
Hi Charlie.Sorry to hear the news about your father,hang on in there,things will improve.
Why not try taking Savannah out for short distances and riding her straight home before she has time to get upset.I know it’s a long haul and never any good getting angry or you have to start all over again from scratch.I had a horse years ago who could be very good or a total pain loading and he wasn’t frightened,just very obstinate,whereas your girl does seem genuinely frightened.Maybe a lorry would be worth considering.Many horses load better and you could take Colin as a travel friend.Good luck.
It’s good to share….😢
Gosh, I hope there is a jolly nice holiday in the pipeline… sending condolences.
You could load Santana on a day with no expectations. Drive her somewhere you could unload her, allow her to graze in hand for a while, load her back up and take her home. Do that a few times. Then load her, take her somewhere , tack her up, untack her, take her home. The more she equates a ride in the trailer with non stressful events, the more she' all calm down. She's only 5, and just had a traumatic travel experience with the vet. You .ah need to take so.e steps back before progress is made.
I wonder if he was autistic? I'm so sorry for your loss.
😢😢
Mental health is hard to live with…and hard to understand too..your father sounds like he needed therapy..but his generation weren’t so open to it .