Would Japanese parents approve their kids marrying a foreigner?
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
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takashifromjap...
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Takashi-san, おはようございます! Just wanted to let you know I have completed my first month on Preply learning Japanese. It is so helpful that you get you own private tutor, so thank you for pushing me in the right direction.
My brother, I told you many times to provide automatic translation for all countries, including Arabic, and not all people understand Japanese and English translation, and I wrote you this response through translation because I do not understand English.
My wife, son and I are interested in moving out of America, where would you send me for more information on immigration/integration into Japanese society? Thank you!
Nobu-san, where did you get that hat? me wants it so badly... Also the way the Obasan with red-black top said "welcome", makes me looking for flights right away lol. Great video Takashii-san.
Hey, why is your UA-cam channel so awesome, but your Facebook page, so crappy? You’re like two completely different people… Your Facebook stuff is awful. I’m only mentioning this because I’m not sure whether or not it’s really you or not and if you’re aware that someone is posting as you, and they’re posting really crappy things. You seem like a really cool guy and all your videos here… So I was really surprised that your Facebook page was so bad.
“Unlike anime we dont speak with subtitles in real life” 😂😂
That was funny 😅
True. That’s only in movies. Besides I never believe what I see on tv or in the movies or anime anyway
君達も映画の時みたいに字幕付きで話してくれないよね
Then why I can see it? XD
i laughed my ahh up ngl
Shows importance of knowing the language
True, I feel so glad sometimes that I learned Eng so I can enjoy wider range of contents not only online also in irl
It honestly does!
I think it shows more the importance of being able to communicate well.
Agreed. That’s going to be me in the future marrying a beautiful Japanese woman when I live in Japan and studying over there.
@@LewisColmenaresfetishizing
Finally, ask parents questions. Always want to see more older generations’ opinions and point of view. It would be rare and important in the future.
Open minded, thoughtful and respectful people. This is what I encountered in my visit to Japan, that and such kindness. My husband was japanese but his parents came from Hawaii and moved to US. So he was American Japanese, but I learned a bit about the culture and now I will try the language! Thank you
もっと上手に成ったらこれを読んでね、頑張れ！
Use Anki and immersion. Hammer out the Core2k deck to get a foundation.
There’s plenty of resources. Just don’t rely too much on textbooks. Those won’t make you fluent
Honne and Tatemae
Yes, there is that to some extent. A couple of them were very well traveled, though which may have an impact.
@@John3.36🤦🏻♂️
I don't know how to put it, but it was a very cute interview.
I could really feel the same "gentleness" (or kindness ?) that japanese people had when I lived in Japan, I miss it a lot
The park lady with her "Japanese people don't use straight way of speaking" is on point, take all they say with a grain of salt
It's more about saying things indirectly with overtly polite euphemistic phrases etc. than actually lying
As a Japanese, I would like to tell the reality(honne).Judging from the national data and my actual experience, please consider that the performers this time are quite a small number. I don't think they use tatemae(建前).
The current international marriage rate for Japanese women is 0.98%, and men are 3.3%, and the overall rate is 2.2%. In other words, 99.2% of Japanese women and 96.7% of Japanese men are married to Japanese people. This is far too low compared to other countries. From the 1990s to the early 2000s, the overall peak was 6%, and it has continued to decline to this day. South Korea in the same East Asia is a well-known conservative country with 9.1% of the total, but it may be more friendly to foreigners. I think that once it peaks, it will start to decrease, just like in Japan.
Also, although it is not well known, japanese people in their late 40s to early 60s have a better impression of foreigners than other generations.
Therefore, the people who appeared in this video are very biased and may cause discomfort to everyone abroad. I'm really sorry as a Japanese️
ごめんなさい🙏🙇♂️
"foreigners are good as long as they speak the language, respect the culture and dont break the law. Its more accepted in cities than in rural areas." Sounds similar to European countries in the past and look what happened. Lets hope Japan wont end the same way.
💯👌
This was so wholesome. They all seemed like such kind people. 🥺❤️
As a Swede currently staying in Japan due to work, I would say that the gentleman talking about Japan being a very special country is absolutely right. But I like it a lot. There are so many similarities between the Nordic people and the Japanese people that I never even imagined. Japan is the country where I don’t feel awkward being a Scandinavian introvert. Wonderful country, wonderful people, wonderful culture based on mutual respect.
日本が好き 🇸🇪❤️🇯🇵
Not over-reacting, being a little shy and keeping a subtle distance, not making overly-fake expressions or appealing to others, etc.
@@kohtayasuda1984
Exactly. Not really a problem if you come from Scandinavia. On the contrary, quite similar behaviour.
I also see similarities between Japanese and Swiss people.
💯 true. I’m Swedish too, and always feel totally at ease when I’m in Japan. There’s something about their respect for privacy and the expected politeness in most situations that makes me fell happy and safe with the Japanese people. I do my best to appreciate their culture and ways of life. It’s different and precious in many ways yet somehow similar to some customs here in Scandinavia.
Swede here! I'm currently applying for a two week language program next year, how's life over there in reality? :D
I’m British but 29 years ago when I married my Japanese husband his parents were against it on the grounds that it would make his life more difficult. My mother-in-law gave me a hard time until she passed away two years ago. I have enjoyed my life in Japan and I have no regrets.
😶
29 years and she still didnt.... ugh.... sorry to hear that. however I'm glad you've enjoyed you life in Japan.
I just proposed to my girlfriend recently, so the timing of this video couldn't be more appropriate for me. We broke the news to her parents this weekend just gone. Her father's only condition was that I beat him in a Judo match. My flight back to Europe is next week...We had a good run, Mina.
😂
you gotta win bro😭😭 do it for her!
Depressing, how dare you bother her and her family while being this weak?
For some reason, I have a feeling these people don’t answer truthfully, if you know Japanese culture they keep there opinions and concerns close to there chest, Takeshi being Japanese they may open up more but idk if these Japanese folk realised how many people are seeing what they’re saying
Most likely they knew that this will be posted online, otherwise Takashi-san could get into trouble for posting it without their permission. This would subsequently lead to your first point - knowing that so many people will watch this (including other Japanese, possibly family, friends, work-related etc) they will likely try to come up with answers that won't complicate their relationships with other people.
There's where the Japanese tatemae and Japanese honne comes into play.
agree
Isn't that the same in every country?
Westerners tend not to speak their mind, especially when it comes to race.
@@ARKSAAXX-ys9gz no, it's not the same in every country. what does westerner means to you? usa, canada, uk, germany, netherlands and the scandinavian countries?
From what I gather from this video and other sources, moving to live in Japan is a big commitment, more so than other countries. Those who choose to take on the challenge seem to integrate well, since they would be the ones to research and learn about Japan and Japanese. Great video! Great perspectives!
Californian born but currently reside in Osaka with my wife, our convos are 95% Japanese 🇯🇵 🇺🇸
I’m a Canadian in Japan who’s been married to a Japanese woman for more than 20 years. When she first announced to her parents we were dating (which is basically the same as announcing engagement here) her parents were admittedly pretty surprised. But not against! And it didn’t take them long to come around, and I’ve enjoyed a great relationship with them since. (This is a good thing, considering we ended up building a house in a plot of land next to theirs!)
My father and mother in law did, it was understood and traditional for me to ask them for permission to marry their daughter, which I did and they gave their approval. I see nothing wrong with that. They only asked me one question and that was would I one day in the future live in Japan, they were in the U.S. on a temporary stay of 5 years at the time. It took many years until my wife and I working together to make that happen. We are in Japan each year for part of the year, and the rest of the year in the U.S. For us, there are advantages benefits in both countries. I can understand and respect Japanese parents concerns and opposed to such a marriage.
It's 98.3% a clash of culture at the end of the day. They can make having two differing cultures work, but it can make bonding very difficult. It's like a meat lover being in a relationship with a vegan. It's possible, but both sides will have to sacrifice some of their own values and a majority of people don't have the willpower to do it.
Takashi-san, I love your interviews. Always respectful, asking the hard questions, and using a gentle humor. You are bringing the world closer together. I love Japan and lived there 45 years ago, in rural Miura near Yokosuka. I have so many beautiful memories of Japanese people who were not familiar with foreigners, but who were so kind and welcoming to us.
That was a smooth segue for your ad. Flawless transition.
I’m moving to Japan with a student visa next year to enroll in a Japanese language school. After I graduate with N1 I’m gonna start a company and business there franchising Malaysian goods into Japan and obtain PR
I love Japan more than anything else💪💪
がんばって！!
Goodluck!
Bro I don’t think us Japanese people want a bunch Malaysian Muslim shizz
Japan loves Japan more than anything else too. They look down on the rest of Asia. You'll find out when you reach N1 capabilities.
Love the goal mindedness.
All the best!
I noticed something while watching all these Japanese people who went abroad.
They feel and look different. I can tell immediately that they have broadened their horizons andve seen the wider world beyond thlensse of only seeing and living in Japanese society.
It's so great to see that. It's a form of development and openness. 🙏
Traditional Japanese women are more beautiful than westernized Japanese women tho
@@tsdfghjkl I never mentioned nor I intended to talk about Japanese Women. I'm speaking in general.
@@tsdfghjkl ok
@@tsdfghjkl Traditional women look attractive regardless of race.
However, traditional women are more likely to date men of the same race.
Because it's traditional lol.
Find a traditional woman of your race. That's the quickest way.
@@by-vs5dm 笑 笑 حَى حَى
I love you Nobu!!!!! Big hugs from FL! Obrigado!!!
This was wonderful, Takashi. Extremely proud of you.
Takashii is at his best when he interviews elderly Japanese and by far it's the most interesting and entertaining...I think I would like to maryy Takashii-san. Lol!!!!
I think it depends on who you let in (ehmm…Europe and the US, you’re done). If you bring people who respect the local culture and customs that’s great. But if only people who know only to rely on kindness of others, take advantage of it and try to impose their own culture and religion, it’s a way to end your own society.
When being interviewed on TV / Social Media, there's the Japanese tatemae answer or response and then there's the Japanese honne answer / response.
True. That being said, as one of the interviewee said, they're all from Tokyo and therefore are probably more open to foreigners. I'd love to know what rural Japanese people think.
I'm not Japanese, but if I were to be interviewed like this, I would be polite and give opinions that would not be controversial.
People like to use the word “tatemae” and make it a uniquely Japanese thing, but non-Japanese do it too.
Althouh I'm already 35, I'm going to Kyoto next year to study Japanese for three months, and to check if I like it and can adapt well there, in which case I'll probably be back to study japanese for a couple years afterwards
Nice people, clear thinkings. Good to see this.
Great video as usual. I love how this channel aims to help the world understand and love Japanese people and culture. I have known many Japanese people and l can honestly say they are exceptionally kind, funny and friendly.
My husband & I are very excited to visit Japan in a couple of years. I tell him we must learn the language first. Plus, we watch so much anime, it would be helpful too. But I feel we wouldn't want to leave Japan once we're there. I think it is crucial that tourists & foreigners who plan to live there respect & maintain Japanese culture & their lifestyle so that it never changes.
I rather liked the attitude of the people you interviewed! Open-minded, relaxed, but not naive.
That's exactly what fascinates me about Japan! They have their culture.. their language and are very proud of it and foreigners should accept and respect that! I think it's good that people value the fact that when you come to Japan you can speak Japanese (at least a little). In my opinion that makes it easier to get along and in particular it makes it easier to master the cultural customs/differences...“The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.”
― Ludwig Wittgenstein
every country has a culture lol
@@FSVR54fr
every country has a culture lol x2
@@FSVR54 Yes, that's true of course, but there are countries that are proud of their culture and want to preserve it (see Japan) and then there are countries where that's not the case (see my home country Germany for example)
@@senortapia8892 You are correct about that. Sweden/France is another example
I have been with my Japanese man for twenty-eight years and we have two kids.
Love my Japanese family and he lovea his Jamaican/ English.
No problems.
I already spoke and understood the Language and culture before I met my man.
We translate for our families and so do our kids.🎉
Nice to hear the positive side finally.
Thanks for the video! It is very interesting to hear how the Japanese elderies think about their children's international marriage.
Great interview! I enjoyed the kind answers of the older generation.
I would love to marry a Japanese woman, but I would want for their parents to approve of it. I dont have parents or any other family, so it would be very lonely to also have a wife who doesnt get along with her family; especially if it were because of me. So I would respect the wishes of the parents if someones parents did not approve of me.
That said, love is love, and true love cannot be stopped. I have also been learning Japanese for a decade so that is at least one barrier overcome.
My mother in law is from Hyogo but her warmth surpassed language barrier and nationality. I speak Japanese but not fluently but whenever I visit her, man, I wish she,'s really my mom. I love our moments when she teaches me to cook Japanese dishes or even doing se cleanup. I'm from the Philippines.
As I person that use be living in Japan, having a relationship with a Japanese and meet dozens of foreigners married to Japanese, DEAR TAKESHI is all the way around my friend, I would never recommend a non asian to marry a Japanese, korean or chinese, not because asian are bad people, not at all, actually great people, but is for MANY other reasons, and I say non asians because I feel that many asians countries share similar values and perhaps more chances to built a decent relationship than a non asian with a totally different culture an values.
I use to live in kyoto and work in a important Japanese videogame company and I meet at work more than 15 foreigners married with Japanese, also many more outside work.
Every friday after work we use to go to isakaya to eat and drink socially, after a while I noticed few patterns that I will share. Every friday all the foreigners of the company after work went straight to the restaurant around 5pm and normally waited to our japanese friends up to 3 extra hours until they decided to leave the company, normally they all stay longer there to show "loyalty" to the boss (thats a silly long story but a great topic for you TAKASHI talk about) anyway when we finally all together we start to have great time indeed and often a bit tipsy :) but after a while I start noticing few patterns like for example every one started complaining about something, super bizarre. Often all the Japanese coworkers complaint about their lives and especially their jobs even things like why we have to work extra hours with no reason. on the other hand the foregners started complaining often about their japanese partners, Im not a person who likes to complain my stuff to others but it was very interesting for me to see how all the other foreigners had very similar complaints like:
my japanese spend to much money in make up :)
my japanese wife spent to much time everyday in make up :)
my japanese wife always wants to see tv while eating :)
my japanese wife looks very different without make up :)
my japanese wife is an antisocial
my japanese wife never wants to leaves home
my japanese husband is a workaholic
my japanese partner cares to much about money
my japanese husband dont pay enought attention to our kids
my japanese wife is a good mum but a terrible wife
my japanese partner stop having sexual desire
since we had kids she or he dont want to have sex
she or he never hug me
she or he never say I love you
She or he dont know how to have quality time after work
she or he never propose good plans apart form work
This is just very few examples and trust me the list was WAAYYY longer but I thing you will get the point. I was in a short relationship for a couple of years with no kids but after a couple of years coming to this parties (never with my partner because she was a highschool teacher ALWAYS marking exams) after a couple of years I started to get a bit panic how all my foreigner coworkers complaints about their japanese partners actually started happening to me little by little.
I really thanks this after-work parties because I stop thinking like a kid who likes anime an wants a Japanese partner and really this parties gave me a different perspective about me, my career goals as a videogame music composer an more importantly my FAMILY GOALS.
I did work a couple more years for this "important videogame company" in Japan and eventually I meet this amazing Colombian girl that encourage me to quick my "dream Job" We came to Australia, married and made our own music business here and I can tell you with absolutely no doubt thats the best decision of my life by really far and I forever thanks my wife for that.
Japanese people are really really awesome people the best friends I can have, my favorite country to visit ( I go almost every year) even my favourite food too but I feel there is to many social problems in Japan and those problems are little by little making Japanese people forget the most important things in life like family.
Now dear TAKASHI perhaps here you can have few video topics about japanese society that not many people wants to talk about
really thank you for the video
Big hug!!
Wow I got many of those complaints too, that's scary
I love japanese culture in general but I truly think having a Japanese wife or asian wife is overrated especially amount the japanese anime lovers or us nerds. Choosing a partner is probably the most important decision in life, don't make your choice because you like anime. I totally agree with your comment of there is more chances finding a better match if both are asians, I know many asian with non asian couples and many of those ended up in divorce especially if they live in Asia.
I currently study in Japan, been here only 1.5 years and already feel that I got most of the complaints you mention, super accurate.
In Western countries, slaves do the heavy labor. In Asia, the average person does the work of a slave. For people with a certain level of status in the West, there are probably many disadvantages to moving to Asia. However, with security getting worse around the world, attention is turning to Japan.
A lot of your examples of complaints are worldwide regardless of ethnicity. The foreigners you know just all have a common denominator of having a Japanese spouse, so it seems like they’re complaining about the Japanese way of life.
@@IzzySalami thanks for the reply. I agree with what you are saying but trust me been living so many years in other countries apart from Japan and been in many "afterwork" ""parties"" and I can tell you that in Japan all these complaints are well known to be "Ichiban sekai de" :)
Also I could see the dynamics of many couples in Japan, friends, coworkers, friends here in Australia(Japanese friends here trying to change those points too) myself etc.
Even many Japanese friends told me about this points dozens of times so trust me I'm not exaggerating, Trust me I been short.
I will say it again, if you are not asian, think twice.
Would be nice to know the views of the Japanese on Pachinko, to know about racism, if it existed/exists as portrayed or it's not real like the series
this is so far your best interview! i love listening to the insights of elderly people. there’s so much to learn from them. ❤
I remember watching your video with this same questions.. right after covid ends and Japan was flooded with tourists.
Most of the respondents didn't want their child to marry strangers. It seems like they have changed their opinion now 😊
I visited Japan a few weeks ago and had a very lovely time. I was so impressed with how orderly people could be in the train stations even when it was so filled with people! I had a nice moment where a man instructed me that I was eating my dry soba noodles incorrectly, he barely knew English but with a smile instructed me where the broth was. Another man gave me a smile and thumbs up from across the room after 😊
Great video. Its good to see people being so accepting despite what other videos will say.
Thank you Takashii. My mother, no longer living, also came from Kumejima as Nobu. Her family moved to Okinawa.
3:28. This actually works haha. I ended up in an Irish Pub in Shibuya back in 2018 and had very nice conversation via Google Translate with a Japanese man while we both drank a few pints. It was one for the memory books.
Aaaaw theyre so kind🥰 and their English is very good!
It's amazing to me to see how some people will strongly resemble one another regardless of distance and background. The guy on the park bench bears a striking resemblance to my neighbor's father, who is very NOT Japanese, since we live in the USA.
この間Takashiさんの動画を観たという外国人の友達に「日本の男性って浮気するのが当たり前なんでしょ？」って言われて😂しかも違う人から何回か、、
だからTakashiさんを日本ヘイト系クリエイターだと勘違いしてましたが違うんですね😂
i like this channel. The interviews look so realistic.
As a Brazilian, I LOVE knowing my country helped that sir change his perception of life, hope we can learn more with the Classical Japanese culture as well.
What a sweet woman 3:51 , honestly all of their responses were refreshing. I do think that the follow up question should have been whether it matters where that foreigner came from, I suspect the responses may have changed.
It’s weird when you get honest answers and not a bold face lie, you almost become speechless
It gives an interesting perspective on how their true unfiltered views are towards foreigners visiting, living, and even dating/marrying in the country and how open they are to the idea of it. Yet again another great video with great interviews!
Dude, them at the end was so wholesome. Especially the two that spoke a bit of English.
あっぷ
Excellent interview! I gained a lot of nice impressions of Japanese from it!
the guy in the floral hat seems really fun to talk to. well all of them do but i don’t know the language
Foreigners who are intent on learning the language and adapting to its culture and laws then yes its a good thing. But foreigners who go there just to establish their little culture and behaving in a way that is not in harmony with Japanese customs must be deported immediately.
My cousin (mexican) lives in the countryside of Japan with his GF (japanese), and her parents told her to move out when they found out.
Long story short, they cut ties with their own daughter because they were against their relationship.
They've been going out for about a decade now. He still hopes that one day they can get along.
Also, I've been watching you from the beginning of your channel, and I'm so happy for you!
Does your cuz have an ig? Thanks
I totally understand abt not feeling a need to mix and wipe yourself out. I like the variety, different cultures and nations with their uniqueness. Makes life so much more interesting and fun.
I like this kind of conversation, it's very informative. I would like to have a positive friend from Japan.
Japanese poeple are really lovely people.
I love my Japanese mother and daugther in law ! ( I am married for 30 years now )
They will say yes on camera, but they will say no in actuality.
This is amazing and very encouraging to hear. Nothing like what I heard 30 years ago, when I went to Japan or dated Japanese women in America. Back in the 90's they were VERY against kokujin.
I am so happy to know that my country (Brazil) has positively changes that man's view in life
I like this different camera perspective
You know what Takashi I'm going to commit to it. Thanks for the inspiration.👍🏾👌🏾
I’m horrible at learning new languages, but I use my phone to communicate at least. I’ll definitely try to learn before I visit Japan.
Nobu seems like a fun and sweet person to be around :)
5:39 I bursted into laughter here. If people want to live in the country and have meaningful relationship, I don't think learning their language is too much an ask.
Really interesting and insightful
Awesome video!
i like how all the moms are like "i dont care pls have babies" 😆
Only have time for a quick listen, but the beginning part that I heard is very encouraging.
Language and cultural differences are a big barrier. But love knows no boundaries.
I would be the happiest man alive if I had a Japanese girlfriend and could speak a mutual language.
Funny. Ojisan remembers talking to a gaijin "once" via a phone app. 😂
Great video! I wasn’t expecting so much acceptance! 😊
ありがとうございます、タカシイさん❤
Thanks TAKASHii...Love Japan.❤👍👍👍👍...
3:55 welcome
So it might be interesting to interview people in very rural areas with the same question?
Good old man in 8:45 made me proud of being brazilian
Beautiful people you have interviewed ❤
Watching from Philippines ❤
Growing up I talked about Japan and how beautiful it was. I dreamed of it and I started studying about Japans nature. I talked so much about Japan that I drove my family crazy and even when I ask where I got the inspiration from Japan my family do not know. It was just something from a past life experience perhaps or something of a shamanic connection. I am still not sure. But one thing I am more curious about is indigenous culture and living closer to nature. My Japanese friends and close ones have always encouraged me and helped me learn more and there is so much wonderful things to discover.
Great interviews Takashii! Looking forward for more adventures.
I think it's vital to understand that the mindset of the City people vs Countryside areas can vary heavily.
There are better more modern ideologies in Tokyo, Osaka, Hiroshima etc. VS country side areas.
I met my japanese gfs father and grandmother, even tho they dont speak english and i dont speak japanese, they were very kind to me. They made Okonomiyaki and we had beer, it was awesome
These were very lovely Japanese people, Takashi! Well done!
Your best video yet
It is refreshing and awesome to see that the Japanese people l, specially those of thebold guard are very open to change and welcoming to others around the world. I do understand their concerns to safeguard their amazing culture but change is inevitable in life. Kudos to Japan and would love to visit soon. ❤️
I've seen a few Japanese and Chinese women get married in my country it's quite cool, I didn't know much about their views in Japan but I guess I do now💯
Moment of TRUTH 😊
Some of these old folks you interviewed are cool af!! 😎
well... keep in mind they are on camera.
people filter themselves when they know they are being filmed/watched
I went to University in Korean (in Korean) (classes taught in Korean) and we had an elective class on *the Diaspora of Koreans*
showing Koreans of Latin america and Goryo-saram and all
I'll never forget the words of a Korean student who honestly gave his opinion..... seeing a mixed Hispanic woman call herself a Korean.
he said he felt cringey.. watching her say that... and he said Quote: ' just because your father is Korean..that does NOT make you Korean' :end Quote.
seriously.
Based
Omg😢
That was a very sweet video. As an American who wishes he had moved to Japan when I was young, I find the open minds of the Japanese people heartwarming. I absolutely love Japan and I wish it nothing but success. It's an example for the world as to what a nation can be when it's truly kind and civilized. Love from Chicago.
I wish my country had the outlook that most of these people share - openmindedness and the understanding that multicultural societies are a beautiful thing
I feel like takashii is paid by the government to convince more people to come to japan 😂
If that's actually the case then that's great for him 😁
Facts, it’s feel like propaganda at this point lol
alla of them are really nice ppl, thx for the video
Very atmospheric ending music theme, love it.)