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Thank you so much for answering my question. I understand it better now. I love the 'hiking/walking and pointing out stuff' metaphor. I like how the video is segmented too. Great question at the end. Something coaches like myself should think about.
Wonderful to hear. And, I think the entire process of becoming a coach is a journey too. :) Thank you for your question, keep them coming. Happy Coaching!
I am thousands of mile away in a city in Bengaluru, India and have spent the last 10 hours on the content that you serve us with, and found them extremely helpful. Thanks Lyssa! Sometimes coaching has a language of its own especially when it is more metaphorical. I have found many 'talents' struggle to understand that language in the first few sessions. For example.. Once I asked what comes up for you when you hear yourself says that? And she was like - What do you mean? I am reading Daniel Goleman and learnt that the ability to decipher metaphorical statements is dependant on the make of the anterior lobes of the brain. So Q - How can we help such Talents with questions that they relate to?
Thank you for the comment, @Twodotoh, and yes, isn't that interesting. I think your example is exactly the perfect example. How will a client become empowered when they don't even understand or have awareness of what shows up for them when they share something. I think many people are overwhelmed and on autopilot. I use the, "What comes up for you as you hear yourself say that" sorts of questions, when the person has said something that sounds like an important insight. It isn't for some random thing they share, "I don't like my boss." "what comes up for you as you say that?" That may be too big a leap. But, "I don't like my boss." "As you hear yourself acknowledge that, what is important, if anything to explore there?" might be a more useful question :) I haven't read Daniel Goleman in a few years, and I don't remember him discussing metaphors. So, I am not able to speak to what he said. That said, I do agree that there are caveats to using metaphors. 1. I rarely, if ever, bring the metaphor forward, rather using the clients' metaphor. When the client creates a metaphor, they do know what it means to them, so it bypasses the coach's "needing" to know how to assess how the client's brain is wired. All that is to say, yes, there are some folks who cannot decipher metaphors. :) And, if your client brings the metaphor forward, then they probably do have the ability to decipher... So your Q - How can we help such talents with questions that they relate to? I think we 1. make sure we are asking what comes up, when they share a powerful belief or insight. 2. If it doesn't land, ask something different or ask them what is a better question. Coaching is only an invitation to self-reflection; the client is always at choice and may need time and safety to access their own awareness. Those are my quick thoughts. Again, thank you for the thoughtful comment.
This is awesome. As a fairly new coach I struggle with this because I'm an ADHD coach and so my clients come to me with the expectation that I'm an expert and that I can give them tools and strategies that will help them function better with their ADHD. When I go to the place of curiosity instead, they can often get a little frustrated and say, "Well I don't know, that's why I'm coming to you!" Any insights?
I think that may be something to address in the Agreement Setting. Example: Hi Client, I will be asking you questions that will invite you to be introspective, and I will give pauses for you to answer; this is all a normal part of the Coaching process. Another thing that shows up for me Lori is that I can Google ADHD tools and get thousands of ideas, planners, books, apps, etc. The bigger issue is what stops me, a person with ADHD, from using or practicing the tools. What am I learning about myself and where I get frustrated with myself when the tools don't work perfectly and then I give up or get upset. :) What are your thoughts on this?
I LOVE this video. Very helpful. I'm trained at the PCC level but I have a themed program for overwhelmed & driven women. Every time I try to do a session where we coach around the problem or try new tactics that have worked for me and other clients, the coaching session is not nearly as effective where if I ask questions more. How could we go about creating themed programs for our specific niche clients while also honoring the incredible competencies with the ICF? Would love to hear your thoughts.
It is definitely an interesting question. I think there is a place for worksheets and resources that they client can use to explore themes; external resources allow the client to gather information on their own. Then the coaching can be driven by the client as to what they want to explore, insights they are having, struggles with turning "knowing" into "action," etc. I could be reading your question incorrectly, but it sounds like the focus is on finding solutions and not exploring your clients' relationship to the ideas of overwhelm or drive, their values, and the strengths that they might leverage as they explore new ways of being in relation to their goals. Please correct me if I am off base. Thank you for the great questions.
@@LyssadeHart Thank you for your reply! Ahh okay I see, so the external resources can be helpful for them so that they can learn the information, then we can do coaching for what the client wants to focus on to help them put any new learning into action is what I'm taking away from your reply. That is very helpful. No you are dead on, the focus is on finding solutions! It should totally be about exploring their relationship with overwhelm, drive, their values & strengths to leverage new ways of being! I love this so much. Because only they know. Time and time again, only my clients have the solutions. I think I will check myself and remind myself that I need to trust they have the answers even though they are coming to me SO stressed out and frustrated. Thank you for a great response!!!
@@resourcequeenlifecoaching Stress and frustration are such powerful hooks for coaches, as we want to "help" yet they are symptoms of what is going on below the waterline. Thank you for sharing your insights :) Happy Coaching!
Join my Coaches Monthly Q&A call here: bit.ly/MonthlyQAsforCoaches
My treat! Each Month we will discuss a Coaching Topic that will support your growth. Get access to the past recordings as well and get your free 1 Resource Development CCE for each month! Woot! 💝
Beautifully and succinctly stated. TY
It's a very interesting line to navigate. :) I am glad it resonated for you @AmyLuckey5192
Thank you so much for answering my question. I understand it better now. I love the 'hiking/walking and pointing out stuff' metaphor.
I like how the video is segmented too.
Great question at the end. Something coaches like myself should think about.
Wonderful to hear. And, I think the entire process of becoming a coach is a journey too. :) Thank you for your question, keep them coming. Happy Coaching!
I am thousands of mile away in a city in Bengaluru, India and have spent the last 10 hours on the content that you serve us with, and found them extremely helpful. Thanks Lyssa!
Sometimes coaching has a language of its own especially when it is more metaphorical. I have found many 'talents' struggle to understand that language in the first few sessions. For example.. Once I asked what comes up for you when you hear yourself says that? And she was like - What do you mean? I am reading Daniel Goleman and learnt that the ability to decipher metaphorical statements is dependant on the make of the anterior lobes of the brain. So Q - How can we help such Talents with questions that they relate to?
Thank you for the comment, @Twodotoh, and yes, isn't that interesting. I think your example is exactly the perfect example. How will a client become empowered when they don't even understand or have awareness of what shows up for them when they share something. I think many people are overwhelmed and on autopilot. I use the, "What comes up for you as you hear yourself say that" sorts of questions, when the person has said something that sounds like an important insight. It isn't for some random thing they share, "I don't like my boss." "what comes up for you as you say that?" That may be too big a leap. But, "I don't like my boss." "As you hear yourself acknowledge that, what is important, if anything to explore there?" might be a more useful question :)
I haven't read Daniel Goleman in a few years, and I don't remember him discussing metaphors. So, I am not able to speak to what he said. That said, I do agree that there are caveats to using metaphors. 1. I rarely, if ever, bring the metaphor forward, rather using the clients' metaphor. When the client creates a metaphor, they do know what it means to them, so it bypasses the coach's "needing" to know how to assess how the client's brain is wired. All that is to say, yes, there are some folks who cannot decipher metaphors. :) And, if your client brings the metaphor forward, then they probably do have the ability to decipher...
So your Q - How can we help such talents with questions that they relate to? I think we 1. make sure we are asking what comes up, when they share a powerful belief or insight. 2. If it doesn't land, ask something different or ask them what is a better question. Coaching is only an invitation to self-reflection; the client is always at choice and may need time and safety to access their own awareness. Those are my quick thoughts. Again, thank you for the thoughtful comment.
@@LyssadeHart Thank you so much for taking time to respond
I love "coaching is an invitation to self-awareness" -- putting it in my toolbox of answers for when people ask me what I do!@@LyssadeHart
This is awesome. As a fairly new coach I struggle with this because I'm an ADHD coach and so my clients come to me with the expectation that I'm an expert and that I can give them tools and strategies that will help them function better with their ADHD. When I go to the place of curiosity instead, they can often get a little frustrated and say, "Well I don't know, that's why I'm coming to you!" Any insights?
I think that may be something to address in the Agreement Setting. Example: Hi Client, I will be asking you questions that will invite you to be introspective, and I will give pauses for you to answer; this is all a normal part of the Coaching process. Another thing that shows up for me Lori is that I can Google ADHD tools and get thousands of ideas, planners, books, apps, etc. The bigger issue is what stops me, a person with ADHD, from using or practicing the tools. What am I learning about myself and where I get frustrated with myself when the tools don't work perfectly and then I give up or get upset. :) What are your thoughts on this?
I LOVE this video. Very helpful.
I'm trained at the PCC level but I have a themed program for overwhelmed & driven women.
Every time I try to do a session where we coach around the problem or try new tactics that have worked for me and other clients, the coaching session is not nearly as effective where if I ask questions more.
How could we go about creating themed programs for our specific niche clients while also honoring the incredible competencies with the ICF? Would love to hear your thoughts.
It is definitely an interesting question. I think there is a place for worksheets and resources that they client can use to explore themes; external resources allow the client to gather information on their own. Then the coaching can be driven by the client as to what they want to explore, insights they are having, struggles with turning "knowing" into "action," etc. I could be reading your question incorrectly, but it sounds like the focus is on finding solutions and not exploring your clients' relationship to the ideas of overwhelm or drive, their values, and the strengths that they might leverage as they explore new ways of being in relation to their goals. Please correct me if I am off base. Thank you for the great questions.
@@LyssadeHart Thank you for your reply! Ahh okay I see, so the external resources can be helpful for them so that they can learn the information, then we can do coaching for what the client wants to focus on to help them put any new learning into action is what I'm taking away from your reply. That is very helpful.
No you are dead on, the focus is on finding solutions! It should totally be about exploring their relationship with overwhelm, drive, their values & strengths to leverage new ways of being! I love this so much. Because only they know. Time and time again, only my clients have the solutions. I think I will check myself and remind myself that I need to trust they have the answers even though they are coming to me SO stressed out and frustrated. Thank you for a great response!!!
@@resourcequeenlifecoaching Stress and frustration are such powerful hooks for coaches, as we want to "help" yet they are symptoms of what is going on below the waterline. Thank you for sharing your insights :) Happy Coaching!
@@LyssadeHart Thank you for answering! I will definitely take this new insight into my coaching. Happy coaching to you as well Lyssa :)