Hey everyone hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 3 Steps to Heal Yourself after a Toxic Relationship Ends (Warning: Spots are limited) 🗒 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> www.healyourheart.school/webinar 🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> www.healyourheart.school/guide 💕 Apply For Heal Your Heart School Here! www.healyourheart.school/call
This is wonderful, thank you! Also I think a lot of people start as a "rescuers" then sometimes subconsciously start trying to practice being qualifying, but almost end up morphing into avoiders as a knee-jerk reaction: I know I've definitely done that!
I think a tricky topic I still struggle with is knowing what self-love looks like, and knowing how to "give my needs to myself" like love, connection and soothing, so that I don't constantly feel the need to search for such things outside of myself (such as a partner/crush/work/alcohol/vices), but at the same time learning how to do that without developing an unhelpful independence complex! A lot of the time I think people struggle (I know I do!) with finding the right balance between giving to myself and receiving from others, both in the very general holistic sense
@@jaclynrosenfeld8363 balance can be so difficult! I have created an entire video on my approach to self love here: ua-cam.com/video/4lc-w7FVLtw/v-deo.html
This is so true. One of my best friends married a man that our mutual friend tried to set me up with years ago but I was so focused on the narcissist I was trying to win over at the time that I didn’t even give him a second look. Now that I know him and see him in the role of a husband I realize how I missed out on someone great bc I had my blinders on.
very useful informations, i decided to watch all your videos. I want to improve my self on this part of my life and your videos seems like they will help me on my process. thank you for doing this.
I'm totally 'done' with dating on-line ... 🐟 Fish, bathrooms, cars, bikes, food, dead animals 🦌 (hunters) or 'in the gym' photos & with a bunch of drunk friends🍻 or 'the ex' with her face scrubbed out 🙅🏻 .. & finally 'the artist' with the black & white photo, posing like he's too good for you🥇 ... ! 🙄 So, I've promised myself to meet someone naturally ... 😊 ... I really appreciate the fact you're addressing on-line dating but it's such a minefield ... 🚧
If we let the 99% of people that aren't right for us affect us, then we might miss the 1% who ARE compatible with us online. Meeting someone naturally is a wonderful thing, but I think online dating can be too if you have the right mindset 🙏
Joan, you’re going to run to all those same types “naturally” as well. One of the main points I have taken from Amy’s advice is that quantity matters. (Obviously how you handle the “quantity” is a huge factor as well). I’m using a dating app, but I’m also making an effort to meet women outside of that. Also, I’m not into it myself, but the dead fish guys might just be trying to show you that they’re outdoorsmen. And one last point… I’ve seen several women holding up dead fish on apps as well. Didn’t appeal to me …but I guess we know who it might appeal to!
I love your content but don't agree that it should take 6 months to know if there is commitment in a connection unless you are both continuing to date multiple people all along the way. Maybe you are referring to 6 months to tell if they are a life partner? I think most coaches say 2-3 months is normal to get to exclusivity and then down the road exploring longer term commitment. I certainly think it is good to stay in the dating stage but 2-3 months has always been enough information for me to know if I want to pull my profile down or not and I think that is very reasonable.
My previous comment was deleted and I want to address this. Honestly timelines are and should remain fluid - don't take any coaches advice verbatim. In this video I was referring to the 6 month mark to know whether there is real commitment material there, a life partner if you want to call it so, and I also agree you can know within 2-4 months whether you want to be exclusive with someone. Watch my dating and relationship stages videos where I unpack the differences of these stages more!
Thanks Amy great video. I've learned a lot from the information you shared and I plan on joining your Facebook group looking forward to hearing more on this topic from you.
@@LoveByDesign that is a great question Amy. I would love to know more about how to rewrite the stories that we have in our head that we tend to tell ourselves when we are online dating. I know for me I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to online dating. I get so much anxiety that I don't even try. So any tips on that would be great!
Hi, Amy. I’m still hung up on my former husband. He has come back twice after he left me; the first after his second wife left him, the second after he struggled with online dating. Man, I was so happy each time he came back, but the rejection is so painful. The second return became clear he is using me for a quick ego boost and he hasn’t changed his mind about being together. He promised quickly things he didn’t deliver, and never explained when I asked. He did say, if we are still single at sixty, maybe we could be together. How could I be happy to know I’d be his absolute last choice? What compels someone to think it is okay to treat a person this way? It is folly to try to be with someone who doesn’t want us. He is encouraging me to begin online dating, but I would rather be loved than rejected, so I ought to fix my anxious attachment first. Thank you.
Thr real question is what is compelling you to stay with someone who treats you like complete garbage. You deserve so much more. You deserve a healthy love ❤ start believing that in your heart and leave this ahole behind!
So glad you asked this. I speak from my own experience and so I speak to women. But I am interested in talking more with the men that find my content valuable, if you’d be open to that could you email me here amy@thelovebydesign.com
This is so true. One of my best friends married a man that our mutual friend tried to set me up with years ago but I was so focused on the narcissist I was trying to win over at the time that I didn’t even give him a second look. Now that I know him and see him in the role of a husband I realize how I missed out on someone great bc I had my blinders on.
Hey everyone hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts? Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 3 Steps to Heal Yourself after a Toxic Relationship Ends (Warning: Spots are limited)
🗒 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> www.healyourheart.school/webinar
🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> www.healyourheart.school/guide
💕 Apply For Heal Your Heart School Here! www.healyourheart.school/call
This is wonderful, thank you! Also I think a lot of people start as a "rescuers" then sometimes subconsciously start trying to practice being qualifying, but almost end up morphing into avoiders as a knee-jerk reaction: I know I've definitely done that!
I think a tricky topic I still struggle with is knowing what self-love looks like, and knowing how to "give my needs to myself" like love, connection and soothing, so that I don't constantly feel the need to search for such things outside of myself (such as a partner/crush/work/alcohol/vices), but at the same time learning how to do that without developing an unhelpful independence complex! A lot of the time I think people struggle (I know I do!) with finding the right balance between giving to myself and receiving from others, both in the very general holistic sense
@@jaclynrosenfeld8363 balance can be so difficult! I have created an entire video on my approach to self love here: ua-cam.com/video/4lc-w7FVLtw/v-deo.html
You’re videos are absolutely amazing. I’ve just finished binge watching them and taking notes, thank you so so much. ❤️
You are so welcome!!
This is so true. One of my best friends married a man that our mutual friend tried to set me up with years ago but I was so focused on the narcissist I was trying to win over at the time that I didn’t even give him a second look. Now that I know him and see him in the role of a husband I realize how I missed out on someone great bc I had my blinders on.
very useful informations, i decided to watch all your videos. I want to improve my self on this part of my life and your videos seems like they will help me on my process. thank you for doing this.
You are so welcome 🙏
I'm totally 'done' with dating on-line ... 🐟 Fish, bathrooms, cars, bikes, food, dead animals 🦌 (hunters) or 'in the gym' photos & with a bunch of drunk friends🍻 or 'the ex' with her face scrubbed out 🙅🏻 .. & finally 'the artist' with the black & white photo, posing like he's too good for you🥇 ... ! 🙄 So, I've promised myself to meet someone naturally ... 😊 ... I really appreciate the fact you're addressing on-line dating but it's such a minefield ... 🚧
If we let the 99% of people that aren't right for us affect us, then we might miss the 1% who ARE compatible with us online. Meeting someone naturally is a wonderful thing, but I think online dating can be too if you have the right mindset 🙏
Joan, you’re going to run to all those same types “naturally” as well. One of the main points I have taken from Amy’s advice is that quantity matters. (Obviously how you handle the “quantity” is a huge factor as well). I’m using a dating app, but I’m also making an effort to meet women outside of that.
Also, I’m not into it myself, but the dead fish guys might just be trying to show you that they’re outdoorsmen. And one last point… I’ve seen several women holding up dead fish on apps as well. Didn’t appeal to me …but I guess we know who it might appeal to!
Lmao not for nothing this post was hilarious and @joan was pretty spot on 😂 I don't blame you sis. I don't blame you one bit
I love your content but don't agree that it should take 6 months to know if there is commitment in a connection unless you are both continuing to date multiple people all along the way. Maybe you are referring to 6 months to tell if they are a life partner? I think most coaches say 2-3 months is normal to get to exclusivity and then down the road exploring longer term commitment. I certainly think it is good to stay in the dating stage but 2-3 months has always been enough information for me to know if I want to pull my profile down or not and I think that is very reasonable.
My previous comment was deleted and I want to address this. Honestly timelines are and should remain fluid - don't take any coaches advice verbatim. In this video I was referring to the 6 month mark to know whether there is real commitment material there, a life partner if you want to call it so, and I also agree you can know within 2-4 months whether you want to be exclusive with someone. Watch my dating and relationship stages videos where I unpack the differences of these stages more!
Totally a rescue mindset!
Yes!
Thanks Amy great video. I've learned a lot from the information you shared and I plan on joining your Facebook group looking forward to hearing more on this topic from you.
@@LoveByDesign that is a great question Amy. I would love to know more about how to rewrite the stories that we have in our head that we tend to tell ourselves when we are online dating. I know for me I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to online dating. I get so much anxiety that I don't even try. So any tips on that would be great!
@@kiara-n-riegn8646 I took your advice and created this video! ua-cam.com/video/Coygst-mB_w/v-deo.html
I see myself stuck in enjoying the chase. I felt it, but didn’t know how to put it into words. I’m not proud of this. 😕
Hi, Amy. I’m still hung up on my former husband. He has come back twice after he left me; the first after his second wife left him, the second after he struggled with online dating. Man, I was so happy each time he came back, but the rejection is so painful. The second return became clear he is using me for a quick ego boost and he hasn’t changed his mind about being together. He promised quickly things he didn’t deliver, and never explained when I asked. He did say, if we are still single at sixty, maybe we could be together. How could I be happy to know I’d be his absolute last choice? What compels someone to think it is okay to treat a person this way? It is folly to try to be with someone who doesn’t want us. He is encouraging me to begin online dating, but I would rather be loved than rejected, so I ought to fix my anxious attachment first. Thank you.
Thr real question is what is compelling you to stay with someone who treats you like complete garbage. You deserve so much more. You deserve a healthy love ❤ start believing that in your heart and leave this ahole behind!
This is for women? What about having info geared towards men? 🤔
So glad you asked this. I speak from my own experience and so I speak to women. But I am interested in talking more with the men that find my content valuable, if you’d be open to that could you email me here amy@thelovebydesign.com
This is so true. One of my best friends married a man that our mutual friend tried to set me up with years ago but I was so focused on the narcissist I was trying to win over at the time that I didn’t even give him a second look. Now that I know him and see him in the role of a husband I realize how I missed out on someone great bc I had my blinders on.