I know and feel exactly like you do. I’ve spent most of my life alone, I’ve done everything on my own, I’ve strugg😢 alone , I enjoy being alone, I never get bored by myself. I have tv to watch what I want, listen to music all day long if I want to, I doodle poems , draw, crochet, cheat arts and crafts,do my housework’s, laundry, cook,I just keep myself busy, I take rests or nap when I feel like it, I don’t have to answer to anyone’s demands, I just enjoy myself, my peaceful time, I talk to GOD AND PRAY, I READ WHATEVER II FEELL LIKE READING. I CAN GO ON AND ON WITHOUT TALKING OR GETTING IN TOUCH WITH ANYONE FOR DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS…❤❤❤❤
No worries, I totally relate! And so does my boyfriend - who is right now touring Spain for four months - and so does my son, who can just disappear and reappear whenever, even to and from different countries. We love meeting up, but we all love our solitude and respect each other's solitude. I wouldn't trade our way of living for the world! Thanks again for all your insights - big plus is that they are so relatable!
I'm 68, I've been that way my whole life. Sociable enough but most people are vapid. I'd rather watch movies, exercise, work. Having one good person to share life with is sufficient.
Thank you for sharing this chapter of your life where you only wanted solitude cause I'm going through the same thing. Sana hindi rin ito pagiging selfish.
I went through the semi”hermit” phase a long time ago. Then I met my soulmate ❤ We are together 24/7 (and have been for many years) except when she kicks me out of the kitchen or I try to clean 🧼 stuff lol 😊 We absolutely love being together constantly ❤😂😊 I can’t even remember the last time I showered alone 😜 Most mornings when I wake up she wants to “exercise” that’s what she likes to call it 😜♥️. WOOHOO!!! 🎉 I’m much happier now and my health - mental physical and emotional is far and away better than ever. It’s amazing what happens when you are blessed with finding and having your soulmate. ❤❤ Neither of us want to go off with our own friends to do things we would rather do together. So our friends tend to be couples, and yes we will be at a BBQ or gathering where the ladies are in the house and the gents are outside or something but that’s more than enough time apart for us. And you know what? Our friends are all the same way with their partners. Cheers
Great video has me looking at my self! My 3rd marriage here 😂 n the Philippines, an 71yrs old now. Had a mild stroke 3yrs ago, an ok now my wife was great, but my health isn't the best now! And like you I don't want to be a involent where I can't take care of myself 😢 just hope an pray the Lord takes me! Because I don't want to be a burden on my wife😢 she's at 57 now has her own issue's 😢 well thanks an letting me unload. One of your best an true videos , speaking from the heart👊
I've seen a documentary on blue zones ( where ppeople regularly live past 100 years old ). One of the main reasons is being sociable. People who become isolated die younger. Other factors are healthy diet, lots of walking, having a purpose , a reason to get up every day, a hobby, having something to care for like a pet or a garden/house plants.
@ScoreGuru123 Isolation will send you crazy. That's why it is used ias punishment in prison. A case study of this is Port Arthur prison in Australia. Where it once had a policy that all new inmates had a 2 year Isolation period before being placed with other inmates.. Every inmate introduced to the prison this way went completely insane. it became the first nursing home in Australia, because they all ended up needing full time care.
In Manhattan there was a saying, essentially - the shortest measurable time is between when the lights turns green & the cab driver behind you honks I know a shorter - men may understand
Very Well Said. I filled my boots between marriages but its a shallow way of living for both men and women. Having your own time and interests essential for all of us. I know my French wife would look after me till the end but i certainly don't want that to happen. Really enjoy listening to your thoughts so thanks 👍
Glad your so hapoy stephen your family ate gold a nice filipina whose loyal and a great kid what else could you need god bless glad your health improves now happy new year
You are not being selfish, you are trying to find out how to live with your life without being involved or interacting others. Being married or being single, is not for everyone. And I don’t see anything wrong with that. Btw, I love the background music, birdsong naturally, and the views. Be well and take care.
I married a single very religious African 45 years old who turned out to never had sex before. It will be 8 years in September 2025. A few years back we took her 2 Niece's under our care one 8, the other 12 now, who could not read or write. But would speak their dialect, a little French, and English. I put them in a private school that teaches English, French, and German! The eldest advanced rapidly for over a year now 1st in class!!! The youngest a year now is 5th in her class, that's the whole school. It was not easy at first, a lot of tears, at age 70 I feel now, happy they are in my life. Don't get me wrong, when you take on the responsibility of 2 young girls, my retirement money is not my own anymore like I had planned. Children cost money! Plus I have 4 in America grown and on their own. One cannot be selfish to do what my wife and I are doing. It is life changing for certain! But it beats the hell out of a selfish life! Maybe God will see to give reward! I'm nit perfect 😮
I do enjoy my own company here in Cebu during the week as my wife teaches to far away to make it home. So i think I have the best of both worlds. Then at the week end we are together with our daughter, who attends school where my wife teaches, and we holiday together out of term time.
Some people are lucky enough to get a really good wife or husband that wants to make a life together. Rather than just walk away when there are problems, both people are willing to work it out, that's how you want it. . But this is very rare these days. I think Philippino woman are beautiful in their own way, but they are just not for me. I think i will just live It out here in a little country town in Australia. Once I get more settled, I will get a dog. And set myself up to be more self reliant. Its not by any means easy on your own, nor is it fun when you're unwell and no one is there to assist. But I chose this over going through more financial loss and stress. Plus I can't afford to start over again. Best wishes to you.
Hello mate, i like your videos,... talking about your experience and sharing your thoughts!! All men like that😂 including myself!! To have a family is important ❤️ as you gradually feel the time-bites!!! It's better to think of partnership/ marriage as a responsibility rather than a "burden"!! Rather! It's a choice or a retrospective decision!! That's why sometimes, it is unfair to one of the partners!!
I agree being single in the way you describe makes a person insular. It's growing in popularity, I agree it's probably not healthy for non introverts anyway. This kind of self centeredness is leading to fewer couplings and fewer births. But no risks of a relationship. Dependence is the natural state, in Asia it's taken too far in terms of obligations, especially the offspring have a burden to look after the parents who don't plan for their retirement. I also don't like that but it's the culture. Personally I like my own space too much and I don't trust anyone anymore to have a relationship with. I don't want to share anymore. Maybe in PH or Thailand I would but I don't find love in the usual places so far.
This discussion sounds like a postcard from Japan. Being on your own and shutting the world out is prevalent in Japan. Also not wanting to be a burden on others is a Confucius teaching ingrained throughout east Asia. This is why the Japanese stay healthy into advanced old age, so as not to be a burden.
Mate, sounds like you're an introvert, like me. Love my peace and spending time with myself, but life of the party when i'm out. People don't understand the word introversion. Most people think it's a quiet person who is shy, but it's wrong. It's someone who needs to charge their battery away from people. Whereas extroverts recharge their energy around people. I could have written your script. Similar story in many ways. Had a daughter at 24. The mother and I broke up a couple of years later. Over the years, women have come and gone (and i treated them like you did). Now i'm 44, and have been keeping to myself for the last few years. Will probably end up in the Philippines (went there two years ago for a boots on the ground trip), but not sure i want marriage as i want my freedom, yet i'm sure i'd get bored of chasing tail after a while. Then again, i slowly warming to the idea of growing old with a female companion. Cheers from Sydney
Yes i can see by your writing we are pretty similar in that way. I used to love locking myself away in my own world. Now i'm married again but still like my own time to myself.
Nearly everyone ends up living alone that's because if you have a partner, and children not living at home if there are children, you usually don't die/divorce/ separate at the at the exact same time of death and others are single. and for some being reclusive can exist whether on your own or with a partner
I think it's more of a guy thing, just having, or needing quiet time alone. Being married to my Filipina wife of 33 years, I still enjoy sitting alone when it isn't expected of me to be with her at whatever family function. Retired now, and back in the Philippines in a permanent situation, and my wife just turning 60. I'm looking forward to the "Golden Years" with her here.
After my divorce 20 years ago I was on my own with plenty of money and time for a few years. Got really boring after a while. Much happier as a family man going on 16 years with my Thai wife and raising our new daughter! Far more productive and meaningful retirement than sitting at some bar chatting up bargirls.
Sir its necessary to be selfish when your single ! But as soon as your married and making baby's, it's not about you anymore ! Here in America in my youth , I courted a woman for 3 years , married for 6 months ? Time waits for no one...
I married a single very religious African 45 years old who turned out to never had sex before. It will be 8 years in September 2025. A few years back we took her 2 Niece's under our care one 8, the other 12 now, who could not read or write. But would speak their dialect, a little French, and English. I put them in a private school that teaches English, French, and German! The eldest advanced rapidly for over a year now 1st in class!!! The youngest a year now is 5th in her class, that's the whole school. It was not easy at first, a lot of tears, at age 70 I feel now, happy they are in my life. Don't get me wrong, when you take on the responsibility of 2 young girls, my retirement money is not my own anymore like I had planned. Children cost money! Plus I have 4 in America grown and on their own. One cannot be selfish to do what my wife and I are doing. It is life changing for certain! But it beats the hell out of a selfish life! Maybe God will see to give reward! I'm nit perfect 😮
God instructs us to look after the Widow and the Orphan. James 1:27...“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” He does not ask you to be perfect mate, because He is and knows we are not, but you have Humility and Love and that is the true wealth in life.
I know and feel exactly like you do. I’ve spent most of my life alone, I’ve done everything on my own, I’ve strugg😢 alone , I enjoy being alone, I never get bored by myself. I have tv to watch what I want, listen to music all day long if I want to, I doodle poems , draw, crochet, cheat arts and crafts,do my housework’s, laundry, cook,I just keep myself busy, I take rests or nap when I feel like it, I don’t have to answer to anyone’s demands, I just enjoy myself, my peaceful time, I talk to GOD AND PRAY, I READ WHATEVER II FEELL LIKE READING. I CAN GO ON AND ON WITHOUT TALKING OR GETTING IN TOUCH WITH ANYONE FOR DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS…❤❤❤❤
You’ve just spoken my life, I’m 60, and totally get it, there’s lots of people who need there own company to be able to be what society calls normal,
No worries, I totally relate! And so does my boyfriend - who is right now touring Spain for four months - and so does my son, who can just disappear and reappear whenever, even to and from different countries. We love meeting up, but we all love our solitude and respect each other's solitude. I wouldn't trade our way of living for the world! Thanks again for all your insights - big plus is that they are so relatable!
I'm 68, I've been that way my whole life. Sociable enough but most people are vapid. I'd rather watch movies, exercise, work. Having one good person to share life with is sufficient.
its basically being an introvert! that's how I feel all the time to be honest.
I am the same way, I always disappear,I enjoyed staying by myself,❤️🙏🙏🙏🇺🇸🙏
Thank you for sharing this chapter of your life where you only wanted solitude cause I'm going through the same thing.
Sana hindi rin ito pagiging selfish.
I went through the
semi”hermit” phase a long time ago.
Then I met my soulmate ❤
We are together 24/7 (and have been for many years) except when she kicks me out of the kitchen or I try to clean 🧼 stuff lol 😊
We absolutely love being together constantly ❤😂😊
I can’t even remember the last time I showered alone 😜
Most mornings when I wake up she wants to “exercise” that’s what she likes to call it 😜♥️. WOOHOO!!! 🎉
I’m much happier now and my health - mental physical and emotional is far and away better than ever.
It’s amazing what happens when you are blessed with finding and having your soulmate. ❤❤
Neither of us want to go off with our own friends to do things we would rather do together.
So our friends tend to be couples, and yes we will be at a BBQ or gathering where the ladies are in the house and the gents are outside or something but that’s more than enough time apart for us.
And you know what?
Our friends are all the same way with their partners.
Cheers
Being comfortable being alone in solitude is a gift…I also very much appreciate my friends when we do connect
Great video has me looking at my self! My 3rd marriage here 😂 n the Philippines, an 71yrs old now. Had a mild stroke 3yrs ago, an ok now my wife was great, but my health isn't the best now! And like you I don't want to be a involent where I can't take care of myself 😢 just hope an pray the Lord takes me! Because I don't want to be a burden on my wife😢 she's at 57 now has her own issue's 😢 well thanks an letting me unload. One of your best an true videos , speaking from the heart👊
Thank you so much my friend
I've seen a documentary on blue zones ( where ppeople regularly live past 100 years old ). One of the main reasons is being sociable. People who become isolated die younger. Other factors are healthy diet, lots of walking, having a purpose , a reason to get up every day, a hobby, having something to care for like a pet or a garden/house plants.
@ScoreGuru123
Isolation will send you crazy. That's why it is used ias punishment in prison.
A case study of this is Port Arthur prison in Australia. Where it once had a policy that all new inmates had a 2 year Isolation period before being placed with other inmates.. Every inmate introduced to the prison this way went completely insane. it became the first nursing home in Australia, because they all ended up needing full time care.
In Manhattan there was a saying, essentially - the shortest measurable time is between when the lights turns green & the cab driver behind you honks
I know a shorter - men may understand
I enjoyed your honesty bro
Hi really appreciate your conversation 🌹❤️❤️🙏❤️🙏🙏🙏🙏
You speak my thoughts.
Very Well Said.
I filled my boots between marriages but its a shallow way of living for both men and women.
Having your own time and interests essential for all of us.
I know my French wife would look after me till the end but i certainly don't want that to happen.
Really enjoy listening to your thoughts so thanks 👍
Good talk. We all have these fears whether we live in Phil' or elsewhere. No easy solutions, for sure.
You really made me think🌺🌷🌹❤️🙏🙏🙏🙏
Glad your so hapoy stephen your family ate gold a nice filipina whose loyal and a great kid what else could you need god bless glad your health improves now happy new year
Honest Document, good on you.
Thank you, I appreciate the comment.
Enjoying your story 👌
Cheers form Perth Australia 🦘
Thanks for watching, mate
You are not being selfish, you are trying to find out how to live with your life without being involved or interacting others. Being married or being single, is not for everyone. And I don’t see anything wrong with that. Btw, I love the background music, birdsong naturally, and the views. Be well and take care.
I married a single very religious African 45 years old who turned out to never had sex before. It will be 8 years in September 2025. A few years back we took her 2 Niece's under our care one 8, the other 12 now, who could not read or write. But would speak their dialect, a little French, and English. I put them in a private school that teaches English, French, and German! The eldest advanced rapidly for over a year now 1st in class!!! The youngest a year now is 5th in her class, that's the whole school. It was not easy at first, a lot of tears, at age 70 I feel now, happy they are in my life. Don't get me wrong, when you take on the responsibility of 2 young girls, my retirement money is not my own anymore like I had planned. Children cost money! Plus I have 4 in America grown and on their own. One cannot be selfish to do what my wife and I are doing. It is life changing for certain! But it beats the hell out of a selfish life! Maybe God will see to give reward! I'm nit perfect 😮
I do enjoy my own company here in Cebu during the week as my wife teaches to far away to make it home. So i think I have the best of both worlds. Then at the week end we are together with our daughter, who attends school where my wife teaches, and we holiday together out of term time.
Been there done it all...
Hey, when are you doing a video on fishing in the Philippines? That will be good!
Some people are lucky enough to get a really good wife or husband that wants to make a life together. Rather than just walk away when there are problems, both people are willing to work it out, that's how you want it. . But this is very rare these days.
I think Philippino woman are beautiful in their own way, but they are just not for me.
I think i will just live It out here in a little country town in Australia. Once I get more settled, I will get a dog. And set myself up to be more self reliant. Its not by any means easy on your own, nor is it fun when you're unwell and no one is there to assist. But I chose this over going through more financial loss and stress. Plus I can't afford to start over again.
Best wishes to you.
Hello mate, i like your videos,... talking about your experience and sharing your thoughts!! All men like that😂 including myself!! To have a family is important ❤️ as you gradually feel the time-bites!!!
It's better to think of partnership/ marriage as a responsibility rather than a "burden"!! Rather! It's a choice or a retrospective decision!! That's why sometimes, it is unfair to one of the partners!!
Thank you my friend, Yes, family is important and partnership is a big decision.
There is nothing wrong with being selfish. Because I enjoy my alone time and my own company.
I agree being single in the way you describe makes a person insular. It's growing in popularity, I agree it's probably not healthy for non introverts anyway. This kind of self centeredness is leading to fewer couplings and fewer births. But no risks of a relationship. Dependence is the natural state, in Asia it's taken too far in terms of obligations, especially the offspring have a burden to look after the parents who don't plan for their retirement. I also don't like that but it's the culture.
Personally I like my own space too much and I don't trust anyone anymore to have a relationship with. I don't want to share anymore. Maybe in PH or Thailand I would but I don't find love in the usual places so far.
This discussion sounds like a postcard from Japan. Being on your own and shutting the world out is prevalent in Japan. Also not wanting to be a burden on others is a Confucius teaching ingrained throughout east Asia. This is why the Japanese stay healthy into advanced old age, so as not to be a burden.
A little dog and youtube I would be fine😂
Snap 😂
I am the same guys.xx🎉🎉😂😂
If i end on my own here God forbid,im gone .
I live that way in that Philippines most Expats Especially Americans are trouble.
Mate, sounds like you're an introvert, like me. Love my peace and spending time with myself, but life of the party when i'm out. People don't understand the word introversion. Most people think it's a quiet person who is shy, but it's wrong. It's someone who needs to charge their battery away from people. Whereas extroverts recharge their energy around people.
I could have written your script. Similar story in many ways. Had a daughter at 24. The mother and I broke up a couple of years later. Over the years, women have come and gone (and i treated them like you did). Now i'm 44, and have been keeping to myself for the last few years. Will probably end up in the Philippines (went there two years ago for a boots on the ground trip), but not sure i want marriage as i want my freedom, yet i'm sure i'd get bored of chasing tail after a while. Then again, i slowly warming to the idea of growing old with a female companion.
Cheers from Sydney
Yes i can see by your writing we are pretty similar in that way. I used to love locking myself away in my own world. Now i'm married again but still like my own time to myself.
The outside world can be pretty fucked up.
Nearly everyone ends up living alone that's because if you have a partner, and children not living at home if there are children, you usually don't die/divorce/ separate at the at the exact same time of death and others are single. and for some being reclusive can exist whether on your own or with a partner
Yes that is so true. I think many factors play into living alone.
I think it's more of a guy thing, just having, or needing quiet time alone. Being married to my Filipina wife of 33 years, I still enjoy sitting alone when it isn't expected of me to be with her at whatever family function. Retired now, and back in the Philippines in a permanent situation, and my wife just turning 60. I'm looking forward to the "Golden Years" with her here.
Good on you Jes
What online teaching company are you with now? If any?
Now i have gained private students from East Asia when i was there. But there is one that comes to mind called Cambly.com
You disappeared like Lord Lucan not Lord Mountbatten😊
It’s called solitude.
So what happens if you are married. The house and land are in the wifes name and she dies. What happens to the property?
If you have children it goes to them, Outside of that i believe it goes to the family
After my divorce 20 years ago I was on my own with plenty of money and time for a few years. Got really boring after a while. Much happier as a family man going on 16 years with my Thai wife and raising our new daughter! Far more productive and meaningful retirement than sitting at some bar chatting up bargirls.
selfish and irresponsible to have a child at a senior age
Why is that? Please let us know
Sir its necessary to be selfish when your single ! But as soon as your married and making baby's, it's not about you anymore ! Here in America in my youth , I courted a woman for 3 years , married for 6 months ? Time waits for no one...
Get a dog to live with you. Get a girlfriend to not live with you.
How old is your son?
How old are you
35
I wish hahaha
57
damn roosters is there not an area there not going nuts
Maybe read a book or two.
You can replace your wife? , mate you really are in love with that poor woman.
Meaning?
no why is that a horrible image when somebody is dead for few weeks without being found...I am sure he / she couldn't care less.
More of a concern is how long it took to transition to being dead.
A lot of people turn their phones off... drives me mad. Cheers from Perth, best city in Aus. 🦘🦘🇦🇺
I married a single very religious African 45 years old who turned out to never had sex before. It will be 8 years in September 2025. A few years back we took her 2 Niece's under our care one 8, the other 12 now, who could not read or write. But would speak their dialect, a little French, and English. I put them in a private school that teaches English, French, and German! The eldest advanced rapidly for over a year now 1st in class!!! The youngest a year now is 5th in her class, that's the whole school. It was not easy at first, a lot of tears, at age 70 I feel now, happy they are in my life. Don't get me wrong, when you take on the responsibility of 2 young girls, my retirement money is not my own anymore like I had planned. Children cost money! Plus I have 4 in America grown and on their own. One cannot be selfish to do what my wife and I are doing. It is life changing for certain! But it beats the hell out of a selfish life! Maybe God will see to give reward! I'm nit perfect 😮
God instructs us to look after the Widow and the Orphan. James 1:27...“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” He does not ask you to be perfect mate, because He is and knows we are not, but you have Humility and Love and that is the true wealth in life.