Mandy: Once she’s 18 we’re no longer parenting our daughter! Also Mandy: How DARE you interfere with our parenting our 18 year old daughter? That’s our job! What a crock!
*NTA.* This was definitely some kind of sadistic power move by Mandy. What parents like Mandy have a hard time understanding is that they cannot expect their child to act like an adult, but still expect them to fall in line and obey like a child. If Layla is going to be 18, then what she does is her own business, end of story. I guarantee this abuse from Mandy didn't come out of nowhere.
Indian parents can be like that, and I'm sure they aren't the only ones. Want their kids to have adult responsibilities, but having adult freedoms is Doubleplus Ungood. This Mandy though, she's just a straight up narcissistic abusive monster.
Mandy is a controlling, narcissistic psychopath. She wanted Layla to be on streets as punishment so she would be financially desperate and dependent on Mandy. You'd usually see this kind of abuse from homophobic parents.
Exactly 💯, she had to be abusive for a long time for her to fly off the handle like she did. For Pete's sake she tried to attack her kid when she said she was moving in with op. That says she can't handle that she's getting her control over her kid despite tossing her out of the house and saying now she's an adult. People like her are disgusting and shouldn't be parents at all.
They kicked her out because she was now an adult , yet they want to 'parent' her? They can both go jump. What Layla now does as an adult is not their business.
Guaranteed that with Layla under her roof, she can’t control her daughter and maintain the illusion in front of her husband that she is a good person who he wants to stay with. She is getting rid of the one potential thorn in her new relationship, but is also afraid of what her abused daughter will say to others (mainly Op, who daughter will now be living with,) and how it will effect how people view/think of her.
Story 1: I’m wondering if the brother only wanted OP to post because he knew comments would urge her to get to the root of the issue. He probably couldn’t post likely due to Mandy monitoring his internet usage. Glad he & Layla are free of that whack job.
Wouldn't surprise me of that. The updates prove that he realize he is in a big abusive relationship and couldn't put any help in the danger zone being his house.
My heart bleeds for Layla. Given she's 18, she'll stay with/marry a boy who's abusive, just like her birth-giver Mandy is (verbally, emotionally/mentally, and physically, to the point of landing her in the ICU), fall pregnant, when her husband traps her, then, stay at a women's shelter, for a couple of days, third, have cops and a DV (domestic violence) social worker standby pack all her belongings, sentimental items, legal documents, medical records, etc., with cops and a DV (domestic violence), escape to another state (to raise her baby in a safe environment, because she's scared that her husband and mother will not only take her baby away from her, the moment, she gives birth, but also abuse him, just like her abused her), have all her belongings shipped there, and stay at another women's shelter, fourth, find a cheaper 3-br apartment in a safe neighborhood, take online college courses, work one or two jobs to support herself and her baby, rely on neighbors as her new support system, because she won't have any friends, or relatives in her new state, to help her out; all Layla and her baby will have is each other.⚠️
@@johnbradbury8610or he knows how f**ked he would have been if he addressed it. She would have either put him in a prison cell or a body bag. I've known a mate being arrested for restraining a partner who was trying to repeatedly st@b them...and after three years still hasn't been allowed to see his kids because she got full custody.
Story 1: "Mandy is still really mad and is refusing to come to future family functions because nobody agrees with her". Excellent, she can stay as far away as possible from all the right-minded people of the family, they certainly can do without her whining.
Wow, Layla is lucky she has OP. I don’t understand parents thinking it’s okay to toss their kids to the curb the minute they turn 18. That arbitrary number doesn’t mean you’re ready to be an adult. ETA: Okay, the brother was also being abused so I do have more sympathy for him. Male spousal abuse victims is not as talked about. I’m glad they are all getting help.
Yeah I'll never understand that. I'm 21 and still living with my parents. Thanks to my parents, I've been working super hard to save up money for a down payment for a condo to share with my boyfriend. After I graduated highschool at 17 during the year 2020, my parents got me a cheap, used stick shift car, my dad taught me how to drive it and then I got a retail job and took a gap year until the Covid restrictions calmed down and schools were open again in person. I went to college for a few years, met my boyfriend there, graduated and now I'm working 2 part time jobs, have my own business and getting excited about this new year. I probably would've never done this if my parents just kicked me out at 18. I live in Texas so you basically need a car to drive anywhere and without their help getting me a car, I would've never been able to get a job because any job is too far away without any kind of transportation. I can't believe parents still kick their kids out at 18 in the times we're living in. Makes no sense.
I don't understand it either and my parents never treated me or my sisters like that. I'm not surprised that she abused her husband and kid. She's a toxic despicable person.
Layla’s mother is definitely jealous of her. Springing this on a kid right before 18 is pointless as they won’t be prepared. They weren’t expecting Layla to move out, but grovel and beg and feel like a charity case. Her actually leaving made her mother furious. Went through almost the same thing. Now that I’m fully independent, my parent won’t leave me alone. It’s a mind game. Eta: Bingo
Given she's an abuser, if I had to guess in her mind it'd go like this. Layla has nowhere to go, eventually has to beg to come back. Possibly demand rent from Layla so Mandy has income for free basically. Make the living environment bad enough Layla has difficulty in school. Basically, keep Layla dependent on her so that she maintains control over her and she has a punching bag. Add in that OP says she's always been kinda jealous of Layla, and it adds a "I get to prove I'm better than her because my life is better...nevermind that it took me actively sabotaging her life to make it that way"
She was thinking that she would get to watch her daughter fail. She didn't count on people outside of her being willing to support her daughter because she doesn't actually have love for her daughter. Her daughter is an accessory to her life and she cannot be allowed to be more successful and outshine her mother so she will and probably has always gone out of her way to kick her daughter down at points where it would be detrimental to her daughters progress.
This is crazy because I just went through something sort of like this. My daughter has a friend that just turned 18 and she was in a very desperate home life situation and I allowed her to move in and in response her stepdad live stream on Facebook and burning all of her life long childhood items we ended up having to go to court and getting a no contact order
Omg, that's a sick twisted thing to do. Not just the destroying her precious belongings, its the humiliation of it being destroyed in public, plus the humiliation of everyone knowing her stepdad is cruel. I hope your daughters friend is doing well now.
@@Tokyo_Rose.Having your personal items destroyed on social media is horrible and humiliating but the step-dad doing so isn't humiliating or embarrassing. It shows what an evil, vindictive person that girl was dealing with for years and now no one can question why she cut them off. Those that still do she knows aren't her real friends or family and can cut them out as well.
@@Tokyo_Rose. I meant it not humiliating for the stepdad. Any person who goes public to destroy a family or friends possessions won't feel humiliation doing so. I know the victim is embarrassed but the perpetrator? They don't give 2 F#$KS which is why they went to social media to do so in the 1st place.
@MrJpaynebb Ohh I see, for some reason when I read your comment it didn't register that you meant for the stepdad! LOL! (I meant humiliating for the girl) I sincerely apologize!
It's a very good thing ops brother is leaving. They should call the police and tell them that a person has threatened to hurt themselves. That should get a check in at the minimum a psychiatric hold at most.
During high school it was made clear to me that after graduation I could keep living with my parents as long as I either full-time or a part-time mix of went to higher education, got a job, did volunteer work. I eventually moved out on my own at 21. Dad kept trying to get me to move back for years and I know that the safety net of moving back is always there if I need it even nearly 20 years later.
My parents were the same. I moved back in when I was 40 originally for a year, then dad became sick and it was either stay with him as his carer or put him in a home. I stayed. We got on quite well and he wasn't a burden, he just couldn't do a lot of things for himself, like cooking and cleaning and shopping. I stayed for 14 years till he died and he was able to sit in his own garden feeding his beloved chickens and loving his cat who was old and died shortly before he did. He was there for me when I needed him and I was there when he needed me. Be good to your children when they are young, you never know if you'll need them when you are old.
Story 1 - At first I thought Eric was a simp but it turned out he was just trying to dodge Mandy's psychotic behavior being aimed at him. He should consider himself blessed he never had children with Mandy. Mandy is acting like a complete psycho to her own daughter. What kind of parent gets angry about the fact their kid is going to move in somewhere they'll be safe and won't have to struggle for money. I'm fully convinced this had nothing to do with expecting Layla to stand on her own but rather to somehow punish her for having to raise her. Mandy is jealous of her own daughter. That's sad.
This is where Laila not being interesting on finding her bio dad could be change for trying to find him? Like Mandy probably did the same stunt with her first husband. Like pulled the same crap and he tuck tail because he can't fight it.
Jealousy. Those women who become accidental parents, who've never quite grown up inside, who see another "woman" (girl child) take attention away from them with a step parent that they themselves brought into the home...They're like three year olds throwing tantrums, for their entire lives. Speaking from personal experience.
@@johnbradbury8610I'm going to sound incredibly cynical, but people keep thinking that "love will conquer all" and sometimes, it just cannot. We cannot be "redeemers" to our loved ones. Or full time therapists. The husband probably did not recognize the extent of her issues; without prior experience or professional training, few do. Then a sense of loyalty kicks in; can't abandon someone you say you love the first time things get difficult, right? and on it goes. The victims cannot and should not be blamed; society's habit of this is very sad.
@@Kayenne54 Yes. You're absolutely right. Although you can argue that those women who are jealous of their daughters don't just feel threatened by the attention they're getting whether it's from family, friends or someone else, but they also feel threatened by them because of their delusional belief that they're being replaced by a younger model.
They basically gave her a week to magically become self-sufficient, yet they still want a say in what she does. At least give her a year's notice. Six months. Give her SOMETHING! I mean, DAMN!
Because mother wasn't actually trying to kick her out, she was expecting her daughter to cry and beg to stay there which would feed her ego and give mother the chance to lay down rules to further her control over her daughter. When the daughter actually left mom threw a tantrum because the whole thing was an ego and control trip that fell apart.
Abusive mom: "You have no claim on Layla, she's my garbage to throw away!" OP is a superhero for rescuing Layla! Aww Monster-Mandy won't come to family functions? Double win! She and Eric the Simp can go to hell, if there was such a thing. Update: So Eric was also a victim of Mandy. I hope he and Layla gets help.
Well, you hit the nail on the head. That is EXACTLY what Mandy was going for. I am pretty sure Mandys parents kicked her to the curb for her behavior, and then she got pregnant. She is determined that her daughter NOT have a better shot at adult life than she did.
Agreed. My parents were always willing for me to come back temporarily after I left the military, and between jobs. Parents don't just toss their kids out on the street. Good parents help their kids. That help is reciprocated later when the parents need help. Mandy will quickly find herself cast out with no support. 😡
my parents waited until after I'd gotten my acceptance to college before springing it on me that they weren't going to pay and kicking me out the day I turned 18, while I was still attending school. I got my diploma, but FASFA assumes you're under your parents taxes until you're 24, and they make too much together for me to get anything for financial aid. guess who's still stuck trying to find a way to improve my life without fking myself over
Boomer here. My parents told me when I was 12 that at 18, I was going to be out of the house, paying 1/3 of my reasonable paycheck in room and board, or attending college. Needless to say, at 12 years old I panicked for a couple weeks until they realized how I took it. Turns I went into the Air Force, older bro broke my foot which delayed my enlistment and post basic training technical school, so I took nearly a gap year, burned through my savings, traveling and when I was home, did all the major house cleaning and a huge chunk of the cooking.
WTF?? Did they want their daughter to be homeless that badly? I'm just so alarmed and confused! Edit: so the husband and daughter were abused. No surprise there. Still side-eyeing the husband a bit though. I've seen countless tales of abused wives who don't defend their kids out of fear get dragged so I feel the same about him. If I'm a parent, I'd rather take a thousand hits than let my kid get hurt. Hope he gets away from her though and is able to recover and heal his relationship with his step-daughter.
Right. If they were in their right mind, they could have looked at it as if the daughter found a room and roommate. Of course, it sounds like the mother wouldn't have liked it even if the daughter was paying rent, so maybe she did want her daughter homeless.
Because they take it as criticism as though they have failed somehow.And in situations like this, they have failed- likely due to some sort selfish actions under the name of "character building". So when someone else steps in the cognitive dissonance is too much and all they have is anger.
I have a guess that Mandy has felt Layla "ruined her life" (wasn't planned etc) so she's going to destroy her life. And tbh all diagnosis Mandy had.. well she just thrives on abuse, control and hurting others
1st story: Holy hell thank all of the divines for brother growing a spine, and apologizing in a meaningful way. It's technically a wholesome ending. I feel so bad for the brother and Layla, because they were both beaten down by physical and mental abuse. And they were just, scared. I've literally been there, and it's a hard situation to live with.
Anyone who kicks their kid out at 18 deserves to be left alone in old age. By doing this they say 'We did the bare minimum and that is all that is required from us'.
I've been watching your videos for quite a while now but I just subscribed. I really like the way you present everything, and while I like your voice I'm sometimes watching these at work so I appreciate that they are easy to read with no background that is the same color as the letters.
Bad parenting is worse than no parenting. Mandy is a controlling AH! They abandoned their daughter, and are butthurt that she is helped by another family member. Very bad form. 😡
Story 1: I'm still trying to figure out why the brother wanted his sister to get Reddit opinions on whether or not she was the AH. *"My abusive wife, who has kicked out her daughter, is angry that my sister has offered her a place to stay. I want to know: Is she the asshole? I'll have her post it."*
I think it may have been kinda subconscious. Like his mind couldn't consciously admit that what he was going through and what his daughter were going through was as bad as it was and that he needed to leave. But by suggesting OP post this, he gets to see hundreds if not thousands of people saying how his wife sucks, how he shouldn't allow it, and thus it allows his conscious mind to realize "Oh crap, they're right, I need to leave her".
One person suggested that it's because he couldn't safely post anything asking for help himself, and he wanted OP to get to the bottom of what was going on so that help would come.
i'm curious why OP had to ask reddit AITA to allow someone she cares about to stay with her. Its like asking "AITA for stoping my neighbor from beating the shit out of his wife."
I actually laughed when they said OP was interfering with their parenting. You don't want to parent, so now you don't get to. The bed was made, you know the rest. This behaviour is likely not new, and the brother is probably now the sole focus of Mandy's narcissistic abuse if they don't (I hope) have other kids ETA: As someone with bipolar, not taking meds is EXTREMELY irresponsible. Mandy WILL absolutely destroy her life as her behaviour is very clearly manic
People with extreme BPD that refuse to take medication can be terrifying. I knew someone like that -- and she was a nurse! A friend told me she was blackmailing him. She threatened to inject me with insulin she stole from work if I didn't give her an alibi. I reminded her about laws concerning self-defense. Then she threatened to run me over with a car. I told her what she could do with her car. Then she tried breaking into my house while I was at home with my kids. I not so gently persuaded her to leave and then called the police. Lucky for me, she got in trouble at work and decided to move across the country. I have moved, so I'm not too worried about her coming back to find me. I feel for OP's family. I doubt this is the last they will hear from Mandy.
s1: NTA. those two aren't layla's parents in any sense of the word, they're her temporary landlords. parenting doesn't just suddenly do a hard stop at 18, and while it's reasonable to set expectations and give more responsibilities once the kids turn 18, purposely throwing them out on the streets and destroying their belongings the moment they do isn't. OP, you're an absolute diamond, you have nothing to apologize for. mandy can go eat a cactus raw if she's so upset her egg-donation doesn't have to live on the streets.
Story 1: If you don't care where your kid lives, I don't understand why you care where your kid lives??? Also, nobody agrees with Mandy? Gee, I wonder why? And she's threatening not to come to family functions? Don't threaten them with a good time, lady!
Story 1: NTA. That’s not how this works. You throw someone out then you don’t get a say in where they end up. Consider her not coming to future family functions a blessing.
I've never understood parents who throw their kids out at 18. They are rarely prepared to live on their own. The fact that OP's SiL is furious that her daughter is getting help certainly implies that she wants her kid to suffer.
It’s kinda sad I wasn’t sure if I heard this story before or if this another story of a kid being abandoned. One story of a parent kicking their kid out when they turn 18 is one too many
I can remember at least 2 more! One where an 18 year old was told he had to leave,, was taken in by uncle and family, then the parents went and because they'll Didn't mean it!' And the 18 year old twins whose sister took them in, she knew what their parents were going to do. The sister in that one was an angel, she'd already taken in their other sister's 3 children. That's one of my favourite stories.
People who chuck their kid out at 18 with no resources as if they're some giant demented bird, really do my head in. It's not only cruel but creates soooo many societal problems.
People, stop all apologizing to keep the peace. This has caused substantially more problems than it has ever solved. If there’s a problem work on it don’t apologize when you are not wrong.
I think Layla should consider finding her biodad at some point when she’s ready. There’s an excellent chance he wanted to be involved in Layla’s life but Mandy scared him off. They’ve already missed a lot but she might end up with someone else in her life who truly loves her (besides OP and brother). Edit to add: OP and family should familiarize themselves with Malignant Narcissism. MN’s can actually be dangerous when they are challenged/rejected. One article I read said these are the kind of people who will burn down the house rather than lose it in a divorce. We have had MN’s in leadership positions in this country and they did a lot of damage to their districts/country when they weren’t re-elected. Mandy won’t go quietly. Protective orders all around, and definitely all the security you can afford. Don’t park on the street, either.
Mandy may actually not know who the father is, even if she says she does. When a person is in the manic phase of bipolar disorder, they can be hypersexual and just f*ck anything not moving, indiscriminately. A person in full blown mania is a sight to behold, and I can only imagine what Layla endured growing up without a stabilizing influence. Shows how strong she is that she managed to get good grades. I just hope she didn't inherit the bipolar genetics.
Ah yes, because a notice period and easing someone in is for losers. Better not tell Mandy when she moves into a nursing home. She has to learn about dependency from strangers on her own with no help from family. Of course, she’ll still needs to follow orders too, so her daughter should have power of attorney. 😉
Was Mandy kicked out at 18 or what? Is she one of these parents who believe their kids cannot have better life than them and have to suffer the same or more? I'm not for babying adults, but one doesn't become indenpendent the second they turn 18. Many still learn, study, kicking someone out just after they graduated is cruel, let alone while they still didn't finish their education. And suddenly they have to find a place and afford rent, utilities, food, everything. Wanting adult, working kids to pitch in or rent their own place is reasonable, but kicking someone out, because they just became legally an adult? Nah.
My petty side says that if i were the tax person i would have waited a couple years and called the boss and said "oh hey, i forgot to call you after a week. Howre things going?"
Story 1 ….. to Mandy, my apology would sound something like this: “I am SO sorry that Layla has such a terrible mother” probably not a pacifying sentence
I hope OP and anyone else who needs this info knows that many colleges and universities offer counseling services for students. I would highly recommend Layla (and anyone else who needs it!) get some counseling from the college. She needs some counseling and therapy to help her overcome the abuse from her mother.
Good morning from Virginia. I hope you all have a great day and awesome weekend. Love these stories. I am always happy when a notification from you pops up.
Title already reminds me of my aunt. She kicked her 17 year old daughter out due to a fight over her step-dad. Our other aunt, first aunt and my dad's sister, took her in because, not safe. And aunt 1 threw a fit because aunt 2 was undermining her authority. She had also told her daughter to never come back.
She is four years older than he is, not ten. And Eric is not so mentally healthy himself, and he also saw the marriage as a chance to be a father to a child who all his family liked.
OP and her other family sound like savvy people but I hope they, especially Eric and Layla, get a quality lawyer. Aside from the divorce this whole thing has the need for iron clad restraining orders written all over it.
Story 1: I love how the abuser tries to use the threat of her not coming to family gatherings as some kind of threat😂. Oh noooo an abusive asshole nobody likes isnt going to be there, what a shame.
Some Americans have a weird idea about adulthood. Even if they are 18 if they are still in education they can't just throw a child out. As for OP, she seems a great step-aunt. I've taken in people on a short or long term basis when they needed it and it's never backfired on me. It has helped them though and that's all that matters. It's my house and they are my guests. If someone else has a problem with it they can pound sand.
1st story: Eric needs a little help, but Mandy is seriously sick. I hope the family all realize that if she's slandering them in social media, a few screenshots will help a lawyer teach her how to deal with other human beings. >:-) Story 2: Some bosses, and the companies they represent, deserve to be taken down a notch or three. I was immediately suspicious when OP was given so many responsibilities AND was the only full-time employee at the satellite site but *not* the manager.
I have a 9 month old son (first and only child for both my wife and I) and I can’t wait to tell him that we are gonna figure out living on his own together and that he will always have a home with us. It’s crazy that you can raise a child for 18 years and then kick them out with no prep or help. Unbelievable.
What's it with Americans parents that "when you're 18 you have to move out" ?? That is insane. I can never see myself doing that to none of my kids. Of course as they grow old I'm expecting them to help out more and have more responsibilities or contribute somehow but there's a limit to that too. Kicking them out isn't putting them out their feet it's just giving them hipper big trauma.
Op-you are helping your niece. You are not an AH-you are to be commended. SIL has lost control of her scapegoat, is now out of control, and your brother had enabled it because he was being treated the same way. It is not easy to disentangle onself from these situations, but it can be done.
That doesn't make any sense. "You've got to stand on your own two feet! I'm washing my hands of you. WAIT you can't interfere in my parenting! It's my responsibility to teach her!" The fucking mental gymnastics to pull of that thought jumble is next level. She's apparently on her own, but Mandy gets to have a say in it because.... she's her parent? I don't... That makes no sense at all. You can't have it both ways.
OP's brother is probably the biggest AH for letting his daughter (step daughter?) be treated like that. He lived with his parents until 27 but is allowing his daughter to be kicked out at 18, what a pathetic sad excuse for a "man". EW. if he didn't want to make waves with his terrible wife, he should be at least financially supporting his daughter. ETA I didnt realize Mandy was also abusing him, what a wild ride!!! my stance on him has softened as men can be abuse victims too
In fairness, the update kinda shows she is willing to go all out on destroying someone life. Wouldn't surprise me that she successfully destroyed her first ex husband like that and he tuck and tailed because she is that dangerous
@@pippo17173 yes she seems TERRIBLE! i think parents need to protect their children first over themselves tho. i think i just have no tolerance for the situation/ am sensitive to parents not protecting their children bc my mom was horribly abused by her dad while her mom was aware, but did nothing.
I worry for OP and Kayla. Mandy sounds as if she could be dangerous when she feels cornered as she must now. I'm glad OP has security cameras and Layla is monitoring her credit because I'm sure Mandy will try to sabotage whatever she can. (I've unfortunately seen this happen.) OP is a true big sister to Layla. I'm so glad she was there for her niece.
Mandy's mother told her to move out when she turned 18. Her mother is pissed and is refusing to attend family functions until OP apologizes. DON'T. Relatives as probably glad that Mandy's mom won't be at family functions. Got confused Layla is daughter and Mandy is mother, oops.
Story 1: Mandy: You need to find somewhere else because we'll no longer be responsible for you 💅 Layla: Okay, I'll move in with Op Mandy: 😮😠😠😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
They wanted to make it hard for her. Some people are like that, I have experience such things. They want to set them up to fail, so that they are always in the Power position. A narcissist mother often sees a daughter as an extension OR as competition.
Kicking a kid out the moment they turn 18 is horrible. Mandy has no reason to complain - her daughter complied and moved out. OP is a good person and definitely NTA.
My husband's mother wanted to boot him out when he hit eighteen but was overruled by her own mother who owned the home they all lived in. His mom had less brain power than a group of ginger cats, who we know only share two brain cells between the entire lot of them. 😂😂
My theory is that Mandy was also kicked out at 18 or so because of her undiagnosed bipolar disorder (because she had a shit family who threw her away rather than get help), got pregnant at twenty and struggled until she met and married the brother. She is extremely jealous of her daughter and also angry at her parents and is determined to make her daughter's life as difficult as possible to get revenge. In her twisted thinking she is going to show Layla that she is not so special and will not be able to make it either, to prove to herself (Mandy) that no one could have done better than she did in the same situation. She also, of course, thinks she owns her daughter. But the catch this time is that her daughter, unlike Mandy, has a sane stepfamily structure who are all ready to support her, and is, so far, not showing any signs of bipolar disorder, and that is enraging for Mandy.
Step niece story: Absolutely NTA OP. Your step niece is an adult, at 18. She can go or do what she likes, as can you. Her parents made it clear to her that they would 'kick her out', as she was no longer their responsibility. They wanted her to be devastated with nowhere to go. Their plot was foiled by your good self who gave her somewhere welcoming to go. You did her a great service and saved her from a very frightening experience. Instead of thanking you, her abusive parents are having a go at you. They have no basis at all for any action after the way they have behaved. If your SIL wants to throw a tantrum and show how entitled she is when she has no case at all, just let her. You support your step niece and her further education and she will be forever grateful for your help and support when her own parents refused.
In the 1980s, when my parents came of age, kicking the kids out at 18 was the norm in poor families. Basically, you’re supposed to “figure it out” mostly because the parents can’t afford to support you anymore. They can’t pay for college, and in the early 80s you could pay for a place to live and community college on minimum wage. (If you’re really frugal and smart of course) I’m hoping Mandy is of that mindset, because she was booted out at 18 and successfully figured it out. Now, that’s what she expects from her daughter. If someone takes her in, she can’t figure it out
Story 1: I hope Eric can divorce Mandy with minimal trouble. At first I was furious on Layla’s behalf because they didn’t give her much warning but with all of the context I see she wanted her daughter to fail. She was probably so jealous she got a full ride.
Getting physically violent with your kid because YOU kicked her out with no way of supporting herself because she's not supporting herself to your liking.. Disgusting. There's way more abuse that the poor child hasn't even recognized yet. It's like a ton of bricks every time you learn of a new abusive act that your parent committed against you that you were too young to understand. These people don't deserve children.
"You're going to be an adult & we're not going to support you anymore" Just because your child grows up doesn't mean you stop supporting them. "She sent me a text that I was out of line for getting involved in her parenting" WHAT PARENTING!? Kicking your child out does not equal parenting. Mandy sucks as a parent. "She's refusing to come to future family functions because nobody agrees with her" Thank God. This way no one will have to deal with her & her BAD PARENTING. I've never understood parents who see their LITERAL CHILD as competition. After Update: Ah so Mandy is like my own mom... an abusive bitch who hides it well in front of others & twists the narrative to fit her story.
Hmm...Eric, Mandy, Layla? Like the pop culture references, so with apologies to the real Eric (Clapton): What'll you do when you get lonely, Turn 18 and Mom throws you aside? Like a boss, you move in with your aunt, And leave you crazy mom behind. Layla!
Layla's actions are no surprise, with her being both bipolar and a narc. Wild mood swing and "I'm the center of the universe. My whim is immutable law. Obey me or else!" is a f**king dangerous combo...
Story 1: (NTA)/ Okay, so why did the niece want to move in with the OP? They told her that she had to move out the day she turned 18? I don't get this bomb drop on an 18-year-old strategy. The mum sounds unstable. What parenting? The niece is almost an adult and it sounds like the mum doesn't want to parent her daughter😮💨 Of course, the brother will side with his wife, no surprises there. I'd let the niece stay and call the police the next time SIL or Bro comes over unannounced and get the niece's stuff out of their place ASAP police escorts are recommended. Jealousy? Interesting... I'm glad that the rest of the family are seeing the s**tshow for what it is. Maybe don't load the 18-year-old up with pets to help her cope🤨 Update: So the brother is getting out of that marriage, yay🥳 What a toxic b**ch.
Mandy: Once she’s 18 we’re no longer parenting our daughter!
Also Mandy: How DARE you interfere with our parenting our 18 year old daughter? That’s our job!
What a crock!
Mandy's using Narcissist (il)logic, which is no logic at all.
*NTA.* This was definitely some kind of sadistic power move by Mandy. What parents like Mandy have a hard time understanding is that they cannot expect their child to act like an adult, but still expect them to fall in line and obey like a child. If Layla is going to be 18, then what she does is her own business, end of story. I guarantee this abuse from Mandy didn't come out of nowhere.
Indian parents can be like that, and I'm sure they aren't the only ones. Want their kids to have adult responsibilities, but having adult freedoms is Doubleplus Ungood. This Mandy though, she's just a straight up narcissistic abusive monster.
Mandy is a controlling, narcissistic psychopath. She wanted Layla to be on streets as punishment so she would be financially desperate and dependent on Mandy. You'd usually see this kind of abuse from homophobic parents.
Exactly 💯, she had to be abusive for a long time for her to fly off the handle like she did. For Pete's sake she tried to attack her kid when she said she was moving in with op. That says she can't handle that she's getting her control over her kid despite tossing her out of the house and saying now she's an adult. People like her are disgusting and shouldn't be parents at all.
These are the people who don't understand that other people around them have their own priorities, interests and their own lives.
Her brother is just enabling his wife probable keeping the peace at home
They kicked her out because she was now an adult , yet they want to 'parent' her? They can both go jump. What Layla now does as an adult is not their business.
A mother jealous of her own daughter. She probably kicked her out at 18, to protect her marriage😐
Guaranteed that with Layla under her roof, she can’t control her daughter and maintain the illusion in front of her husband that she is a good person who he wants to stay with. She is getting rid of the one potential thorn in her new relationship, but is also afraid of what her abused daughter will say to others (mainly Op, who daughter will now be living with,) and how it will effect how people view/think of her.
Story 1: I’m wondering if the brother only wanted OP to post because he knew comments would urge her to get to the root of the issue. He probably couldn’t post likely due to Mandy monitoring his internet usage. Glad he & Layla are free of that whack job.
Wouldn't surprise me of that. The updates prove that he realize he is in a big abusive relationship and couldn't put any help in the danger zone being his house.
My heart bleeds for Layla. Given she's 18, she'll stay with/marry a boy who's abusive, just like her birth-giver Mandy is (verbally, emotionally/mentally, and physically, to the point of landing her in the ICU), fall pregnant, when her husband traps her, then, stay at a women's shelter, for a couple of days, third, have cops and a DV (domestic violence) social worker standby pack all her belongings, sentimental items, legal documents, medical records, etc., with cops and a DV (domestic violence), escape to another state (to raise her baby in a safe environment, because she's scared that her husband and mother will not only take her baby away from her, the moment, she gives birth, but also abuse him, just like her abused her), have all her belongings shipped there, and stay at another women's shelter, fourth, find a cheaper 3-br apartment in a safe neighborhood, take online college courses, work one or two jobs to support herself and her baby, rely on neighbors as her new support system, because she won't have any friends, or relatives in her new state, to help her out; all Layla and her baby will have is each other.⚠️
@@pippo17173 It took him long enough. He is a grown man, he must have major self-esteem issues to stay with a woman who abuses her daughter.
@johnbradbury8610 Unhinged women are comedic jokes or fodder for male podcasters. Not many recognize it has the abuse that it is.
@@johnbradbury8610or he knows how f**ked he would have been if he addressed it. She would have either put him in a prison cell or a body bag. I've known a mate being arrested for restraining a partner who was trying to repeatedly st@b them...and after three years still hasn't been allowed to see his kids because she got full custody.
Mandy: I'm not going to family functions until OP apologizes!
Family: Don't threaten us with a good time!
Story 1: "Mandy is still really mad and is refusing to come to future family functions because nobody agrees with her". Excellent, she can stay as far away as possible from all the right-minded people of the family, they certainly can do without her whining.
Don't threaten me with a good time!
@@DrownedInExile Exactly!
All she's doing is showing how extremely toxic she is by acting like that.
Wow, Layla is lucky she has OP. I don’t understand parents thinking it’s okay to toss their kids to the curb the minute they turn 18. That arbitrary number doesn’t mean you’re ready to be an adult.
ETA: Okay, the brother was also being abused so I do have more sympathy for him. Male spousal abuse victims is not as talked about. I’m glad they are all getting help.
Yeah I'll never understand that. I'm 21 and still living with my parents. Thanks to my parents, I've been working super hard to save up money for a down payment for a condo to share with my boyfriend. After I graduated highschool at 17 during the year 2020, my parents got me a cheap, used stick shift car, my dad taught me how to drive it and then I got a retail job and took a gap year until the Covid restrictions calmed down and schools were open again in person. I went to college for a few years, met my boyfriend there, graduated and now I'm working 2 part time jobs, have my own business and getting excited about this new year. I probably would've never done this if my parents just kicked me out at 18. I live in Texas so you basically need a car to drive anywhere and without their help getting me a car, I would've never been able to get a job because any job is too far away without any kind of transportation. I can't believe parents still kick their kids out at 18 in the times we're living in. Makes no sense.
I was "releaved" to discover the brother had been facing his problems. Now OP can keep helping the niece. Parents and OP can help the brother.
I don't understand it either and my parents never treated me or my sisters like that. I'm not surprised that she abused her husband and kid. She's a toxic despicable person.
The Brother Sold his Soul to a "Demon in the Sack" and some men go almost full masochist trying to keep speaking in tongues in bed.
Layla’s mother is definitely jealous of her. Springing this on a kid right before 18 is pointless as they won’t be prepared. They weren’t expecting Layla to move out, but grovel and beg and feel like a charity case. Her actually leaving made her mother furious. Went through almost the same thing. Now that I’m fully independent, my parent won’t leave me alone. It’s a mind game.
Eta: Bingo
Poor Layla and Eric. What did Mandy expect to gain by throwing Layla out of the house without much warning?
I highly doubt she was thinking that far ahead. It was more about putting Layla in a position where she is disadvantaged, I think.
Given she's an abuser, if I had to guess in her mind it'd go like this.
Layla has nowhere to go, eventually has to beg to come back.
Possibly demand rent from Layla so Mandy has income for free basically.
Make the living environment bad enough Layla has difficulty in school.
Basically, keep Layla dependent on her so that she maintains control over her and she has a punching bag.
Add in that OP says she's always been kinda jealous of Layla, and it adds a "I get to prove I'm better than her because my life is better...nevermind that it took me actively sabotaging her life to make it that way"
She was thinking that she would get to watch her daughter fail. She didn't count on people outside of her being willing to support her daughter because she doesn't actually have love for her daughter. Her daughter is an accessory to her life and she cannot be allowed to be more successful and outshine her mother so she will and probably has always gone out of her way to kick her daughter down at points where it would be detrimental to her daughters progress.
This is crazy because I just went through something sort of like this. My daughter has a friend that just turned 18 and she was in a very desperate home life situation and I allowed her to move in and in response her stepdad live stream on Facebook and burning all of her life long childhood items we ended up having to go to court and getting a no contact order
Omg, that's a sick twisted thing to do. Not just the destroying her precious belongings, its the humiliation of it being destroyed in public, plus the humiliation of everyone knowing her stepdad is cruel.
I hope your daughters friend is doing well now.
@@Tokyo_Rose.Having your personal items destroyed on social media is horrible and humiliating but the step-dad doing so isn't humiliating or embarrassing. It shows what an evil, vindictive person that girl was dealing with for years and now no one can question why she cut them off. Those that still do she knows aren't her real friends or family and can cut them out as well.
@MrJpaynebb I disagree. I know exactly what you mean, but I felt humiliation when school friends saw me being abused.
@@Tokyo_Rose. I meant it not humiliating for the stepdad. Any person who goes public to destroy a family or friends possessions won't feel humiliation doing so. I know the victim is embarrassed but the perpetrator? They don't give 2 F#$KS which is why they went to social media to do so in the 1st place.
@MrJpaynebb Ohh I see, for some reason when I read your comment it didn't register that you meant for the stepdad! LOL! (I meant humiliating for the girl)
I sincerely apologize!
It's a very good thing ops brother is leaving. They should call the police and tell them that a person has threatened to hurt themselves. That should get a check in at the minimum a psychiatric hold at most.
During high school it was made clear to me that after graduation I could keep living with my parents as long as I either full-time or a part-time mix of went to higher education, got a job, did volunteer work. I eventually moved out on my own at 21. Dad kept trying to get me to move back for years and I know that the safety net of moving back is always there if I need it even nearly 20 years later.
My parents were the same. I moved back in when I was 40 originally for a year, then dad became sick and it was either stay with him as his carer or put him in a home. I stayed. We got on quite well and he wasn't a burden, he just couldn't do a lot of things for himself, like cooking and cleaning and shopping. I stayed for 14 years till he died and he was able to sit in his own garden feeding his beloved chickens and loving his cat who was old and died shortly before he did. He was there for me when I needed him and I was there when he needed me. Be good to your children when they are young, you never know if you'll need them when you are old.
Story 1 - At first I thought Eric was a simp but it turned out he was just trying to dodge Mandy's psychotic behavior being aimed at him. He should consider himself blessed he never had children with Mandy. Mandy is acting like a complete psycho to her own daughter. What kind of parent gets angry about the fact their kid is going to move in somewhere they'll be safe and won't have to struggle for money. I'm fully convinced this had nothing to do with expecting Layla to stand on her own but rather to somehow punish her for having to raise her. Mandy is jealous of her own daughter. That's sad.
This is where Laila not being interesting on finding her bio dad could be change for trying to find him? Like Mandy probably did the same stunt with her first husband. Like pulled the same crap and he tuck tail because he can't fight it.
Jealousy. Those women who become accidental parents, who've never quite grown up inside, who see another "woman" (girl child) take attention away from them with a step parent that they themselves brought into the home...They're like three year olds throwing tantrums, for their entire lives. Speaking from personal experience.
He should never have been with, to begin with. He stayed for years. Its good that he's in therapy because he has major self-esteem issues.
@@johnbradbury8610I'm going to sound incredibly cynical, but people keep thinking that "love will conquer all" and sometimes, it just cannot. We cannot be "redeemers" to our loved ones. Or full time therapists. The husband probably did not recognize the extent of her issues; without prior experience or professional training, few do. Then a sense of loyalty kicks in; can't abandon someone you say you love the first time things get difficult, right? and on it goes. The victims cannot and should not be blamed; society's habit of this is very sad.
@@Kayenne54 Yes. You're absolutely right. Although you can argue that those women who are jealous of their daughters don't just feel threatened by the attention they're getting whether it's from family, friends or someone else, but they also feel threatened by them because of their delusional belief that they're being replaced by a younger model.
They basically gave her a week to magically become self-sufficient, yet they still want a say in what she does. At least give her a year's notice. Six months. Give her SOMETHING! I mean, DAMN!
Can you time stamp the "1 week to move out" part? I'm having trouble finding it.
Because mother wasn't actually trying to kick her out, she was expecting her daughter to cry and beg to stay there which would feed her ego and give mother the chance to lay down rules to further her control over her daughter. When the daughter actually left mom threw a tantrum because the whole thing was an ego and control trip that fell apart.
Abusive mom: "You have no claim on Layla, she's my garbage to throw away!" OP is a superhero for rescuing Layla! Aww Monster-Mandy won't come to family functions? Double win! She and Eric the Simp can go to hell, if there was such a thing.
Update: So Eric was also a victim of Mandy. I hope he and Layla gets help.
Mood booster:
Boss put OP in their place.
OP leaves
Boss has *Surprised Pikachu Face* 🤣
☕
As I see it, before the update…
“You have to move out!”
“Ok. *moves in with OP*”
“NOOOOOO, NOO, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO SUFFER”
Well, you hit the nail on the head. That is EXACTLY what Mandy was going for. I am pretty sure Mandys parents kicked her to the curb for her behavior, and then she got pregnant. She is determined that her daughter NOT have a better shot at adult life than she did.
I HATE parents who kick thier kids out when they turn 18, especially if they're going to go to college.
Agreed. My parents were always willing for me to come back temporarily after I left the military, and between jobs. Parents don't just toss their kids out on the street. Good parents help their kids. That help is reciprocated later when the parents need help. Mandy will quickly find herself cast out with no support. 😡
It's an old tatic to teach them independence. A tatic that is old and doesn't even work.
my parents waited until after I'd gotten my acceptance to college before springing it on me that they weren't going to pay and kicking me out the day I turned 18, while I was still attending school. I got my diploma, but FASFA assumes you're under your parents taxes until you're 24, and they make too much together for me to get anything for financial aid. guess who's still stuck trying to find a way to improve my life without fking myself over
Boomer here. My parents told me when I was 12 that at 18, I was going to be out of the house, paying 1/3 of my reasonable paycheck in room and board, or attending college. Needless to say, at 12 years old I panicked for a couple weeks until they realized how I took it. Turns I went into the Air Force, older bro broke my foot which delayed my enlistment and post basic training technical school, so I took nearly a gap year, burned through my savings, traveling and when I was home, did all the major house cleaning and a huge chunk of the cooking.
WTF?? Did they want their daughter to be homeless that badly? I'm just so alarmed and confused!
Edit: so the husband and daughter were abused. No surprise there. Still side-eyeing the husband a bit though. I've seen countless tales of abused wives who don't defend their kids out of fear get dragged so I feel the same about him. If I'm a parent, I'd rather take a thousand hits than let my kid get hurt. Hope he gets away from her though and is able to recover and heal his relationship with his step-daughter.
Right. If they were in their right mind, they could have looked at it as if the daughter found a room and roommate. Of course, it sounds like the mother wouldn't have liked it even if the daughter was paying rent, so maybe she did want her daughter homeless.
Story 1: NTA. Why do parents get upset when someone helps their kid.
Because they take it as criticism as though they have failed somehow.And in situations like this, they have failed- likely due to some sort selfish actions under the name of "character building". So when someone else steps in the cognitive dissonance is too much and all they have is anger.
@@larissapqg81 you put it very well and I'll throw in loss of control
"You have no claim on Layla! She's my garbage to throw away!"
I have a guess that Mandy has felt Layla "ruined her life" (wasn't planned etc) so she's going to destroy her life. And tbh all diagnosis Mandy had.. well she just thrives on abuse, control and hurting others
That's what narcissists do
1st story:
Holy hell thank all of the divines for brother growing a spine, and apologizing in a meaningful way.
It's technically a wholesome ending.
I feel so bad for the brother and Layla, because they were both beaten down by physical and mental abuse. And they were just, scared. I've literally been there, and it's a hard situation to live with.
Wow, I didn't see that coming on 1st story. It's a nightmare for brother and niece. Glad brother finally opened up and got out of the situation.
The mom was wanting the daughter to needlessly suffer for some perverse reason
Anyone who kicks their kid out at 18 deserves to be left alone in old age. By doing this they say 'We did the bare minimum and that is all that is required from us'.
Last story.... Boss put OP on suspension? Time to immediately find a new job. 🤨
Glad OP did, and moved on to better things. 😊
For no good reason, at that. All they did was shoot themselves in the foot.
@lancerevell5979 ☕
I've been watching your videos for quite a while now but I just subscribed. I really like the way you present everything, and while I like your voice I'm sometimes watching these at work so I appreciate that they are easy to read with no background that is the same color as the letters.
Mood booster: people don’t leave jobs, they leave bosses
I’m glad she didn’t let the niece be homeless
Sounds like the mother is angry at OP for showing her up as a parent
I don't think Mandy has ever done any real parenting.
Bad parenting is worse than no parenting. Mandy is a controlling AH! They abandoned their daughter, and are butthurt that she is helped by another family member. Very bad form. 😡
Story 1: I'm still trying to figure out why the brother wanted his sister to get Reddit opinions on whether or not she was the AH.
*"My abusive wife, who has kicked out her daughter, is angry that my sister has offered her a place to stay. I want to know: Is she the asshole? I'll have her post it."*
I think it may have been kinda subconscious.
Like his mind couldn't consciously admit that what he was going through and what his daughter were going through was as bad as it was and that he needed to leave.
But by suggesting OP post this, he gets to see hundreds if not thousands of people saying how his wife sucks, how he shouldn't allow it, and thus it allows his conscious mind to realize "Oh crap, they're right, I need to leave her".
Many people still think men can't get abused by women so maybe he did it to validate that people are on his side
It's basically him wanting someone to ram that thought of being actually right.
One person suggested that it's because he couldn't safely post anything asking for help himself, and he wanted OP to get to the bottom of what was going on so that help would come.
i'm curious why OP had to ask reddit AITA to allow someone she cares about to stay with her. Its like asking "AITA for stoping my neighbor from beating the shit out of his wife."
I actually laughed when they said OP was interfering with their parenting. You don't want to parent, so now you don't get to. The bed was made, you know the rest. This behaviour is likely not new, and the brother is probably now the sole focus of Mandy's narcissistic abuse if they don't (I hope) have other kids
ETA: As someone with bipolar, not taking meds is EXTREMELY irresponsible. Mandy WILL absolutely destroy her life as her behaviour is very clearly manic
People with extreme BPD that refuse to take medication can be terrifying. I knew someone like that -- and she was a nurse! A friend told me she was blackmailing him. She threatened to inject me with insulin she stole from work if I didn't give her an alibi. I reminded her about laws concerning self-defense. Then she threatened to run me over with a car. I told her what she could do with her car. Then she tried breaking into my house while I was at home with my kids. I not so gently persuaded her to leave and then called the police. Lucky for me, she got in trouble at work and decided to move across the country. I have moved, so I'm not too worried about her coming back to find me.
I feel for OP's family. I doubt this is the last they will hear from Mandy.
s1: NTA. those two aren't layla's parents in any sense of the word, they're her temporary landlords. parenting doesn't just suddenly do a hard stop at 18, and while it's reasonable to set expectations and give more responsibilities once the kids turn 18, purposely throwing them out on the streets and destroying their belongings the moment they do isn't. OP, you're an absolute diamond, you have nothing to apologize for. mandy can go eat a cactus raw if she's so upset her egg-donation doesn't have to live on the streets.
Story 1: If you don't care where your kid lives, I don't understand why you care where your kid lives???
Also, nobody agrees with Mandy? Gee, I wonder why? And she's threatening not to come to family functions? Don't threaten them with a good time, lady!
Story 1: NTA. That’s not how this works. You throw someone out then you don’t get a say in where they end up. Consider her not coming to future family functions a blessing.
I've never understood parents who throw their kids out at 18. They are rarely prepared to live on their own. The fact that OP's SiL is furious that her daughter is getting help certainly implies that she wants her kid to suffer.
It’s kinda sad I wasn’t sure if I heard this story before or if this another story of a kid being abandoned. One story of a parent kicking their kid out when they turn 18 is one too many
I can remember at least 2 more! One where an 18 year old was told he had to leave,, was taken in by uncle and family, then the parents went and because they'll Didn't mean it!' And the 18 year old twins whose sister took them in, she knew what their parents were going to do. The sister in that one was an angel, she'd already taken in their other sister's 3 children. That's one of my favourite stories.
People who chuck their kid out at 18 with no resources as if they're some giant demented bird, really do my head in. It's not only cruel but creates soooo many societal problems.
People, stop all apologizing to keep the peace. This has caused substantially more problems than it has ever solved. If there’s a problem work on it don’t apologize when you are not wrong.
I think Layla should consider finding her biodad at some point when she’s ready. There’s an excellent chance he wanted to be involved in Layla’s life but Mandy scared him off. They’ve already missed a lot but she might end up with someone else in her life who truly loves her (besides OP and brother).
Edit to add: OP and family should familiarize themselves with Malignant Narcissism. MN’s can actually be dangerous when they are challenged/rejected. One article I read said these are the kind of people who will burn down the house rather than lose it in a divorce. We have had MN’s in leadership positions in this country and they did a lot of damage to their districts/country when they weren’t re-elected. Mandy won’t go quietly. Protective orders all around, and definitely all the security you can afford. Don’t park on the street, either.
I had a giggle at MN for malignant narcissist. I live in Minnesota aka MN.
@@lauralfreeberg2179 what can I say-lazy morning!
Mandy may actually not know who the father is, even if she says she does. When a person is in the manic phase of bipolar disorder, they can be hypersexual and just f*ck anything not moving, indiscriminately. A person in full blown mania is a sight to behold, and I can only imagine what Layla endured growing up without a stabilizing influence. Shows how strong she is that she managed to get good grades. I just hope she didn't inherit the bipolar genetics.
Ah yes, because a notice period and easing someone in is for losers. Better not tell Mandy when she moves into a nursing home. She has to learn about dependency from strangers on her own with no help from family.
Of course, she’ll still needs to follow orders too, so her daughter should have power of attorney. 😉
The mystery mousekatool a different way to say a gun
Was Mandy kicked out at 18 or what? Is she one of these parents who believe their kids cannot have better life than them and have to suffer the same or more? I'm not for babying adults, but one doesn't become indenpendent the second they turn 18. Many still learn, study, kicking someone out just after they graduated is cruel, let alone while they still didn't finish their education. And suddenly they have to find a place and afford rent, utilities, food, everything. Wanting adult, working kids to pitch in or rent their own place is reasonable, but kicking someone out, because they just became legally an adult? Nah.
People act like its perfectly ok to put other people through bad situations just because they went through it
I was waiting for that update. Thank you
My petty side says that if i were the tax person i would have waited a couple years and called the boss and said "oh hey, i forgot to call you after a week. Howre things going?"
Rent is so expensive nowadays. It is cruel to kick them out at 18 years old.
Mystery mousecatool! Hahaha ‘Merica!
Story 1 ….. to Mandy, my apology would sound something like this: “I am SO sorry that Layla has such a terrible mother” probably not a pacifying sentence
Story 1- OP Should help Layla apply for Medicaid and SNAP to help with expenses getting through college.
So since she treats her daughter poorly, everyone else should do the same? That is shameful. Mandy needs help!
Ahh yes, 1st story is a classic "poisonous mother sabotaged her daughter, out of jealousy"
I hope OP and anyone else who needs this info knows that many colleges and universities offer counseling services for students. I would highly recommend Layla (and anyone else who needs it!) get some counseling from the college. She needs some counseling and therapy to help her overcome the abuse from her mother.
Good morning from Virginia. I hope you all have a great day and awesome weekend. Love these stories. I am always happy when a notification from you pops up.
My mom did this to me when I was 17, moved the things in my room into the hallway so my mom could make my room a sewing room
Title already reminds me of my aunt. She kicked her 17 year old daughter out due to a fight over her step-dad. Our other aunt, first aunt and my dad's sister, took her in because, not safe. And aunt 1 threw a fit because aunt 2 was undermining her authority. She had also told her daughter to never come back.
She’s 18 & they kicked her out, that’s an end to parenting. That was Mandy’s choice.
How desperate is Eric to marry a mean,crazy, single mother 10 years older than he is?
She is four years older than he is, not ten. And Eric is not so mentally healthy himself, and he also saw the marriage as a chance to be a father to a child who all his family liked.
OP and her other family sound like savvy people but I hope they, especially Eric and Layla, get a quality lawyer. Aside from the divorce this whole thing has the need for iron clad restraining orders written all over it.
LOL I love the fact that LG says "douchebag" instead the written "dickbag," as if that's slightly better than the original word. HAHAHAH!!!
Story 1: I love how the abuser tries to use the threat of her not coming to family gatherings as some kind of threat😂.
Oh noooo an abusive asshole nobody likes isnt going to be there, what a shame.
I just noticed the forward and reverse buttons on the palm of his hands😂 for the 1st time😂
Some Americans have a weird idea about adulthood. Even if they are 18 if they are still in education they can't just throw a child out.
As for OP, she seems a great step-aunt. I've taken in people on a short or long term basis when they needed it and it's never backfired on me. It has helped them though and that's all that matters. It's my house and they are my guests. If someone else has a problem with it they can pound sand.
Mystery mousekatool: She’s packing at least one pew pew.
Walmart really sucks when it comes to scheduling people. It's the major reason why I quit there.
Yes! Not in relation to the stories, but Lost Genre finally showed up on my feed on its own and I didn't have to hunt for it!
1st story: Eric needs a little help, but Mandy is seriously sick. I hope the family all realize that if she's slandering them in social media, a few screenshots will help a lawyer teach her how to deal with other human beings. >:-) Story 2: Some bosses, and the companies they represent, deserve to be taken down a notch or three. I was immediately suspicious when OP was given so many responsibilities AND was the only full-time employee at the satellite site but *not* the manager.
I have a 9 month old son (first and only child for both my wife and I) and I can’t wait to tell him that we are gonna figure out living on his own together and that he will always have a home with us. It’s crazy that you can raise a child for 18 years and then kick them out with no prep or help. Unbelievable.
I remember the first job i has tried to schedule me for prom night. I was like i told you weeks ago im not working
NTA. Layla is 18. Mandy and Eric have no say at this point. Obviously Mandy and Eric were trying to hurt Layla on purpose.
Loved story 2!
What's it with Americans parents that "when you're 18 you have to move out" ?? That is insane. I can never see myself doing that to none of my kids. Of course as they grow old I'm expecting them to help out more and have more responsibilities or contribute somehow but there's a limit to that too. Kicking them out isn't putting them out their feet it's just giving them hipper big trauma.
This is not the norm, by any means.
Op-you are helping your niece. You are not an AH-you are to be commended. SIL has lost control of her scapegoat, is now out of control, and your brother had enabled it because he was being treated the same way. It is not easy to disentangle onself from these situations, but it can be done.
That doesn't make any sense. "You've got to stand on your own two feet! I'm washing my hands of you. WAIT you can't interfere in my parenting! It's my responsibility to teach her!"
The fucking mental gymnastics to pull of that thought jumble is next level. She's apparently on her own, but Mandy gets to have a say in it because.... she's her parent? I don't... That makes no sense at all. You can't have it both ways.
OP's brother is probably the biggest AH for letting his daughter (step daughter?) be treated like that. He lived with his parents until 27 but is allowing his daughter to be kicked out at 18, what a pathetic sad excuse for a "man". EW. if he didn't want to make waves with his terrible wife, he should be at least financially supporting his daughter.
ETA I didnt realize Mandy was also abusing him, what a wild ride!!! my stance on him has softened as men can be abuse victims too
In fairness, the update kinda shows she is willing to go all out on destroying someone life. Wouldn't surprise me that she successfully destroyed her first ex husband like that and he tuck and tailed because she is that dangerous
@@pippo17173 yes she seems TERRIBLE! i think parents need to protect their children first over themselves tho. i think i just have no tolerance for the situation/ am sensitive to parents not protecting their children bc my mom was horribly abused by her dad while her mom was aware, but did nothing.
@@pippo17173Who says she was married? Did I miss something?
@shells500tutubo the post said step daughter. Mandy already was married before this and probably divorced for the same reason.
3:13 don’t threaten me with a good time. If that’s how she treats her kid and acts then I’m sure the family functions will be better without her
I worry for OP and Kayla. Mandy sounds as if she could be dangerous when she feels cornered as she must now. I'm glad OP has security cameras and Layla is monitoring her credit because I'm sure Mandy will try to sabotage whatever she can. (I've unfortunately seen this happen.) OP is a true big sister to Layla. I'm so glad she was there for her niece.
Tyvm LG stay safe please, peace.
Mandy's mother told her to move out when she turned 18. Her mother is pissed and is refusing to attend family functions until OP apologizes. DON'T. Relatives as probably glad that Mandy's mom won't be at family functions. Got confused Layla is daughter and Mandy is mother, oops.
🤣 this was that bonus video that was uploaded accidentally yesterday. Not that i mind listening again 😁
Story 1:
Mandy: You need to find somewhere else because we'll no longer be responsible for you 💅
Layla: Okay, I'll move in with Op
Mandy: 😮😠😠😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Why people think when you are 18 you magically are able to accept all the adult responsibility?
They wanted to make it hard for her. Some people are like that, I have experience such things. They want to set them up to fail, so that they are always in the Power position. A narcissist mother often sees a daughter as an extension OR as competition.
Now I wonder if Eric's parents kicked him out when he turned 18. Did Mandy's parents kick her out when she turned 18??
Kicking a kid out the moment they turn 18 is horrible. Mandy has no reason to complain - her daughter complied and moved out. OP is a good person and definitely NTA.
My husband's mother wanted to boot him out when he hit eighteen but was overruled by her own mother who owned the home they all lived in. His mom had less brain power than a group of ginger cats, who we know only share two brain cells between the entire lot of them. 😂😂
My theory is that Mandy was also kicked out at 18 or so because of her undiagnosed bipolar disorder (because she had a shit family who threw her away rather than get help), got pregnant at twenty and struggled until she met and married the brother. She is extremely jealous of her daughter and also angry at her parents and is determined to make her daughter's life as difficult as possible to get revenge. In her twisted thinking she is going to show Layla that she is not so special and will not be able to make it either, to prove to herself (Mandy) that no one could have done better than she did in the same situation. She also, of course, thinks she owns her daughter.
But the catch this time is that her daughter, unlike Mandy, has a sane stepfamily structure who are all ready to support her, and is, so far, not showing any signs of bipolar disorder, and that is enraging for Mandy.
Step niece story: Absolutely NTA OP. Your step niece is an adult, at 18. She can go or do what she likes, as can you. Her parents made it clear to her that they would 'kick her out', as she was no longer their responsibility. They wanted her to be devastated with nowhere to go. Their plot was foiled by your good self who gave her somewhere welcoming to go. You did her a great service and saved her from a very frightening experience. Instead of thanking you, her abusive parents are having a go at you. They have no basis at all for any action after the way they have behaved. If your SIL wants to throw a tantrum and show how entitled she is when she has no case at all, just let her. You support your step niece and her further education and she will be forever grateful for your help and support when her own parents refused.
I bet Mandy is jealous of her daughter and thinks Kayla will end up hooking up with stepdad. Ew….
I am no. 25 happy weekend toooo
In the 1980s, when my parents came of age, kicking the kids out at 18 was the norm in poor families. Basically, you’re supposed to “figure it out” mostly because the parents can’t afford to support you anymore. They can’t pay for college, and in the early 80s you could pay for a place to live and community college on minimum wage. (If you’re really frugal and smart of course)
I’m hoping Mandy is of that mindset, because she was booted out at 18 and successfully figured it out. Now, that’s what she expects from her daughter. If someone takes her in, she can’t figure it out
Story 1: I hope Eric can divorce Mandy with minimal trouble. At first I was furious on Layla’s behalf because they didn’t give her much warning but with all of the context I see she wanted her daughter to fail. She was probably so jealous she got a full ride.
14:08 So, Canada. Because nowhere in the US would one refer to a city being "50 km" away.
Getting physically violent with your kid because YOU kicked her out with no way of supporting herself because she's not supporting herself to your liking..
Disgusting. There's way more abuse that the poor child hasn't even recognized yet. It's like a ton of bricks every time you learn of a new abusive act that your parent committed against you that you were too young to understand.
These people don't deserve children.
"You're going to be an adult & we're not going to support you anymore"
Just because your child grows up doesn't mean you stop supporting them. "She sent me a text that I was out of line for getting involved in her parenting" WHAT PARENTING!? Kicking your child out does not equal parenting. Mandy sucks as a parent. "She's refusing to come to future family functions because nobody agrees with her" Thank God. This way no one will have to deal with her & her BAD PARENTING.
I've never understood parents who see their LITERAL CHILD as competition.
After Update: Ah so Mandy is like my own mom... an abusive bitch who hides it well in front of others & twists the narrative to fit her story.
Hmm...Eric, Mandy, Layla? Like the pop culture references, so with apologies to the real Eric (Clapton):
What'll you do when you get lonely,
Turn 18 and Mom throws you aside?
Like a boss, you move in with your aunt,
And leave you crazy mom behind.
Layla!
Toss somebody out of your house and you have no say in their life
Layla's actions are no surprise, with her being both bipolar and a narc. Wild mood swing and "I'm the center of the universe. My whim is immutable law. Obey me or else!" is a f**king dangerous combo...
u mean mandy right…? cause otherwise…….
Story 1: (NTA)/ Okay, so why did the niece want to move in with the OP? They told her that she had to move out the day she turned 18? I don't get this bomb drop on an 18-year-old strategy. The mum sounds unstable. What parenting? The niece is almost an adult and it sounds like the mum doesn't want to parent her daughter😮💨 Of course, the brother will side with his wife, no surprises there. I'd let the niece stay and call the police the next time SIL or Bro comes over unannounced and get the niece's stuff out of their place ASAP police escorts are recommended. Jealousy? Interesting... I'm glad that the rest of the family are seeing the s**tshow for what it is. Maybe don't load the 18-year-old up with pets to help her cope🤨
Update: So the brother is getting out of that marriage, yay🥳 What a toxic b**ch.
A mystery Mousecatool is a meme slang for a firearm.