Eddie Izzard - Machines That Lie

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  • Опубліковано 4 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 273

  • @sammiecutie1
    @sammiecutie1 13 років тому +62

    Eddie Izzard is the only person I can watch who can say the most randomest thing that anyone can say, some random person could say "Pudding" and no one would laugh, but Eddie Izzard speaks of "Jam and radiators" and makes a whole crowd laugh...I think he has powers of some sort

    • @sallykirkstephens8415
      @sallykirkstephens8415 2 роки тому +6

      He is the best medicine for our nasty selfish world out there . Bless you dear Eddie

  • @QueenToKingOfSpades
    @QueenToKingOfSpades 3 роки тому +27

    The “Wananananana..na na na no… Wananananan na nadon’t think so” bit always has me in stitches.

    • @Seej1982
      @Seej1982 Рік тому +1

      I remember she did that on her website back in 2003. You click a motorcycle and she goes "WANANANANANANANANANA HO HO HAW!!"

  • @LadyOfPurple89
    @LadyOfPurple89 13 років тому +68

    "It's got a turny-dial-knob-thing on the side... AND IT LIES TO US."
    That part had me literally rolling around laughing.

  • @ronarts2005
    @ronarts2005 12 років тому +15

    I like the way he says "One nano milimeter " :) Love eddie

  • @PeteWentzRocks96
    @PeteWentzRocks96 13 років тому +12

    I just love Eddie's use of the phrase " turn-y button". I find him just so freakin' adorable sometimes. : )

  • @cathywhite6442
    @cathywhite6442 Рік тому +3

    Absolutely brilliant. Has a way of turning the most ordinary things in life to fabulously funny

  • @myihc
    @myihc 13 років тому +7

    "All the dead people get in the bin where the grass grows"
    I love his randomness!

  • @CrosbySinatraAndDean
    @CrosbySinatraAndDean 12 років тому +15

    Crying...actually fell over laughing. Love you eddie!

  • @qrrbrbirbel2
    @qrrbrbirbel2 13 років тому +23

    I laughed when he was jamming all the cutlery into the toaster, then went into hysterical laughter at "Take it and do it the bath! in the bath!" he delivers that line so well.

  • @Nelzevir
    @Nelzevir 12 років тому +19

    As a Belgian my glove compartment does, in fact, have a map of Belgium.

  • @DanielVerberne
    @DanielVerberne Рік тому +2

    I love the peace and joy that Eddie Izzard's comedy brings me.

  • @sbreckon1050
    @sbreckon1050 2 роки тому +12

    2021 and STILL THE FREAKING FUNNIEST MAN OUT THERE!!!

    • @macman9831
      @macman9831 21 день тому

      Wikipedia says he’s a she.🤷‍♂️

  • @williesnyder2899
    @williesnyder2899 3 роки тому +3

    Exactly like the lawnmowers I used as a teenager!
    I even had a summer job cutting grass in the community; oh, the experiences!! The terrible experiences!!
    If only I’d known then that I could laugh about lawnmower, lying toasters and other assorted gadgets!! We can see ourselves in the toaster routine! Who knew that a routine could be built up on toaster practices?!
    Brilliant!! I’m so grateful!!

  • @TheBlueorigami
    @TheBlueorigami 13 років тому +17

    He's absolutely right about the shower. So true. xD

  • @MrEulerRocks
    @MrEulerRocks 13 років тому +18

    Thank you Eddie Izzard, I haven't laughed this hard in years, seriously.

  • @AsheeshAnand
    @AsheeshAnand 13 років тому +10

    "The ark's double parked in a puddle" love it.

  • @Gmoviesmoothie
    @Gmoviesmoothie 11 років тому +14

    Oh sweet jesus I think I might have woken my halls up with my laughter! Our toaster lies to us- already caused numerous false fire alarms! And everyone is like that with the showers! Ah thank you Izzard!

  • @Starrlett20
    @Starrlett20 13 років тому +5

    Utter legend.

  • @debramiller3548
    @debramiller3548 Рік тому +4

    Eddy Izzard is bloody funny on every level 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @snorlax42
    @snorlax42 13 років тому +9

    I just realized, the "map of Belgium" bit when he talks about glove compartments is either reused or a callback to his "Dressed to Kill" show when he's talking about the European Union. "There's a map of Belgium in here."

    • @ohgosh5892
      @ohgosh5892 3 роки тому +2

      Actually, before Brexit, we used to go to the EU a lot, and pre-TomTom, we used maps.

  • @Letsgoracing1
    @Letsgoracing1 2 роки тому +4

    Genius. I have the original cassette from the 90's

  • @daphnesgrowthplanet2245
    @daphnesgrowthplanet2245 11 років тому +18

    Witty, intelligent... and the Monty Python influence comes as an extra bonus! I am laughing my head off at the shower sketch :). I love his work because everyone can relate to his humour. Go, Eddie! :)

  • @Xamnada
    @Xamnada 12 років тому +9

    I think this is actually the funniest thing I've ever seen.

  • @TheJam1192
    @TheJam1192 13 років тому +4

    I glove this guy!

  • @frumpy-pumpkin
    @frumpy-pumpkin 12 років тому +8

    "Like toast, mmm..." XD
    I love how he says that!XD

  • @flamencoprof
    @flamencoprof Рік тому +2

    His talent is that he sounds like he is somehow just barely avoiding drowning in the stream of consciousness.

  • @lyamainu
    @lyamainu 13 років тому +6

    Hard to believe this is ten years old. :D

    • @il9237
      @il9237 Рік тому +4

      22 now 😵‍💫

  • @nmegz31
    @nmegz31 12 років тому +16

    4 years and 4 dislikes...does this not prove the epicness of eddie izzard?! :D

  • @HBrownHorseTraining
    @HBrownHorseTraining 14 років тому +3

    i have this like memorized :D i love eddie!

  • @angelgirl123ify
    @angelgirl123ify 14 років тому +7

    omg, hes so friggin funny, i almost fell out of my chair laughin with my friend!! XD

  • @myace1997
    @myace1997 11 років тому +4

    never forget the jam

  • @ZiggyZamfir
    @ZiggyZamfir 13 років тому +4

    "He's your grandad too? Are you my sister? and you're my fathers mother....?WHAT THE FUCK WENT ON IN THIS FAMILY?!?!?" lol XD

  • @hannessolo1
    @hannessolo1 11 років тому +5

    This man is fucking glorious

  • @Ahni17
    @Ahni17 14 років тому +5

    i just about died of laughter at the shower bit :D

  • @DaduBeaPau
    @DaduBeaPau 12 років тому +2

    GENIUS!!!!

  • @PhillipTunaLunatique
    @PhillipTunaLunatique 14 років тому +5

    "Stay down lads! Stay down~"
    XD i love Eddie...i also envy his legs O.O

  • @claudiamanta1943
    @claudiamanta1943 Рік тому +1

    He is the best 😂

  • @rockyhudson3346
    @rockyhudson3346 Рік тому +2

    Very talented funny man !!

  • @Sakkura1
    @Sakkura1 13 років тому +5

    Haha, "it's just an air raid, stay down"

  • @annehebert510
    @annehebert510 Рік тому +1

    1997...Lol!

  • @SherbetRocket22
    @SherbetRocket22 12 років тому +3

    love this!! hilarious stuff and so true!! :D

  • @wardrop48
    @wardrop48 12 років тому +1

    Things like this make me want to be able to like more than once

  • @ememoore729
    @ememoore729 11 років тому +4

    He is Hilarious!

  • @lee.lee.n
    @lee.lee.n 2 роки тому

    The maps... Lol!! My gram had maps of Florida in her car. We lived in NJ and she never went on trips!

  • @packardian
    @packardian 13 років тому

    One position is this...andtheotherpositionisTHIS!

  • @AsboJunior
    @AsboJunior 11 років тому +1

    No Pain no gain

  • @TheFantomRogue
    @TheFantomRogue 13 років тому +1

    Superb

  • @zevverlith
    @zevverlith 2 роки тому +1

    Holy shit, the shower bit is so fucking apt. I love it.

  • @predatorman2
    @predatorman2 12 років тому

    thank you

  • @KakashiRox900
    @KakashiRox900 14 років тому +2

    Lol! "Eat a jam sandwich at the same time, light some matches-burn the house down, wahhh...." I did that last time my toaster got messed up.

  • @TheClockworkQuill
    @TheClockworkQuill 14 років тому +2

    Because of this vid my friend and I cracked up laughing when my history teacher mentioned that at whatever point in history we were talking about toasters were invented. We almost got in trouble because of this.

  • @SuperBeatlesForever
    @SuperBeatlesForever 11 років тому +3

    The grass would go "Oh for God sake." XD

  • @EmiliaMclean
    @EmiliaMclean 14 років тому +1

    the toast part is the best

  • @KorukorukoruYonda
    @KorukorukoruYonda 12 років тому +2

    For someone who reads the Kuroshitsuji manga, I immediately thought of Ronald Knox...who fights with a lawnmower. (Then again, all the reapers fight with gardening tools...)

  • @minischmetterling
    @minischmetterling 11 років тому +1

    "Take and do it in the bath, in the bath!" - that's where I lost it) and that hurt you know, plus I couldn't see anything because of tears from laughing

  • @xXRussellTheRabbitXx
    @xXRussellTheRabbitXx 11 років тому +1

    As soon as he said get a lawnmower I could only think of Ronald Knox from Black butler. Which made it even funnier.

  • @circomnia9984
    @circomnia9984 Рік тому +1

    You should see my f-ing scales lying. I don't even get on it anymore. It's obvious it hates me for some reason.

  • @Shodan451
    @Shodan451 12 років тому +1

    Ronald Knox from kuroshitsuji has a lawnmower sythe. XD

  • @mj-zu5iu
    @mj-zu5iu 2 роки тому

    yeah he uses Belgium because its just funny and he makes it funny, like grandma's, jam and Sean connerys voice haha

  • @CharmedFreak1329
    @CharmedFreak1329 14 років тому

    the lawn's even bigger grandad!!

  • @SaGeOwL4891
    @SaGeOwL4891 11 років тому +2

    It reminds me of that joke when one guy went on the highway in the wrong way and suddently he thinks: "Why is everyone going in the wrong way?!"

  • @MrKeeft1
    @MrKeeft1 3 роки тому

    All so true...........

  • @BelladonnaRLGK
    @BelladonnaRLGK 13 років тому +1

    ah, no, in THE BIN. i can quote this almost totally i've watched it so many times :P

  • @MintyCanRead
    @MintyCanRead 13 років тому +4

    The lawnmower bit, the granddad bit, the toaster bit and the shower bit: all too true o.o (Have I left any bits out? ^^)

  • @Xannari
    @Xannari 11 років тому +3

    I appear to have stopped breathing to laugh

  • @mysteryshrimp
    @mysteryshrimp 11 років тому +2

    3:19
    When I was about 10 I asked my aunt to stop referring to her dad as Grandad. My grandad, your dad.

  • @dantheman931
    @dantheman931 11 років тому +1

    You jinxed it--it's up to 16 now. D:

  • @E6DeltaGirl
    @E6DeltaGirl 12 років тому

    I love him!! xD

  • @honeyLLLL
    @honeyLLLL 12 років тому +1

    lol this makes me cry of laughter xD

  • @logandibnah2281
    @logandibnah2281 11 років тому +1

    *Sticks a knife in a toaster* *instantly becomes hardcore*

  • @sammiecutie1
    @sammiecutie1 13 років тому +1

    @kalasnavic That he is, that he is, and I just ADORE his impressians and when he acts out the things he does XD

  • @weinmj
    @weinmj 13 років тому +1

    "The same people who makes toasters make showers. For they have a turny botton too that lies."

  • @SpidersAreNotScary
    @SpidersAreNotScary 12 років тому

    OF COURSE!! :D

  • @eliparker7151
    @eliparker7151 11 років тому +1

    I've given up on my shower, so I was just like "fuck it", and put it all the way on hot and built an immunity

  • @Spaceboy02111
    @Spaceboy02111 12 років тому +1

    One nano millimeter between fantastically hot and FUCKING FREEZING!

  • @SherbetRocket22
    @SherbetRocket22 12 років тому

    Lawn mower:
    onenananananana no!
    onenananananana i don't think so!
    XD

  • @FunnyJanuka
    @FunnyJanuka 11 років тому +1

    The bit about showers. ME EVERY FUCKING MORNING!!!

  • @Katw76
    @Katw76 13 років тому

    @BelladonnaRLGK I'm with you, I have Glorious, Definite Article and Unrepeatable on playback in my head!!

  • @UJSupanova
    @UJSupanova 3 роки тому

    Always fucking crease at the bit where the grass goes "Oh for fucks sake"

  • @leppeppel
    @leppeppel 11 років тому

    Toast goes in, bread comes out.

  • @midnightblackfire
    @midnightblackfire 14 років тому

    one person has never made toast.

  • @falfield
    @falfield Рік тому

    Inspired.

  • @blink1821986
    @blink1821986 14 років тому +1

    The best part is the part where he goes the only part of the shower we want is between there and there not even a micro millimeter between fantastically hot and fooking freezing I seen it about 3 years ago for the first time and I still lmao when I see it

  • @Viky.A.V.
    @Viky.A.V. 3 роки тому

    "What the f*** went on in this family?" lol =D

  • @KryptojackJr
    @KryptojackJr 11 років тому

    Stay down, lads! Stay down!

  • @JJean97
    @JJean97 13 років тому

    In the Bath! The turney button that lies! The nano-millimeter between FANTASTICALLY HOT and FUCKING FREEZING. LOL!

  • @Draggo548
    @Draggo548 14 років тому +1

    this made me lol so hard XDDD

  • @darkfairybites
    @darkfairybites 11 років тому

    Grim Reaper.. with a lawn mower.... RONALD KNOX!

  • @starrybee10
    @starrybee10 13 років тому

    Toasters! Ahh, toasters are good. Like them. Like toast. Mmm.

  • @Nopp3
    @Nopp3 11 років тому

    double prefixed were used somewhat before the SI system was adopted.
    the SI standard was adopted in 1960.
    not unusual that something sticks around that long, but learning prefixes should be grade-school level as its is a huge part of how everything is measured today.

  • @DreadParasol
    @DreadParasol 14 років тому +1

    "and the grass would go "aww for fucks sake..just lay down mates its just a air raid" and when he turned his back the grass would go FAPOM" LOL hes so fuckin smart

  • @dunespeak
    @dunespeak 13 років тому +1

    @naturluvr15 XD To be honest, when he said scythes were outdated, I was expecting him to say a chainsaw for some weird reason... then I was like "Nooo... That would be ridiculous... Death using a chainsaw?" No, no, a lawn mower works much better. XD

  • @Brandt761
    @Brandt761 12 років тому +1

    I'm pretty sure Death has an industrial harvester these days.

  • @SorakuFett
    @SorakuFett 13 років тому

    @snorlax42 No. Dress to Kill was made after Glorious...

  • @YuukiHyouketsu
    @YuukiHyouketsu 12 років тому

    @BlueThunderFlik thank you! i think Glorious is on Netflix...i can watch the whole thing! yay!

  • @rutters6834
    @rutters6834 12 років тому

    "no description available" - No description fucking needed.

  • @brigeisabella
    @brigeisabella 13 років тому

    NO GRASS NO GRASS NO GRASS

  • @SnowAnayathatweirdgirl
    @SnowAnayathatweirdgirl 11 років тому

    Ronald Knox would approve of this .
    Kuroshitsuji reference .

  • @DoesAngelsHaveWings
    @DoesAngelsHaveWings 12 років тому

    @SpidersAreNotScary Wow, i thought i was the only one to remember Knox when he said that xP
    Kuroshitsuji :D

  • @SophieandHowl4Ever
    @SophieandHowl4Ever 13 років тому

    @WhoOnEarthAreYou possibly referring to a new piece of toast and not the original 3 toast being re-toasted?