the demand for 3 young boys has skyrocketed in the last few years and despite what you'd think, it's expected to stay this high. once rich power brokers artificially increase the price it doesn't naturally go down, like with housing. it used to be, when my grandpa was young, you could buy 3 young boys on a single worker's salary WHILE raising three more young boys of your own ("when you want a boy for you love, you get it from your loins. When you want a boy to own, you get it from des moines." That's the song he used to sing to me every night until I left for college, because des moines iowa was the colonial capital of the three young boys trade, not latin america like I assume this partially inacurrate video implies.) now most gen z like me are lucky if we'll ever afford to buy three young boys.@@heinzguderian628
european medicine too. They thought they got it from the Arabs but had actually just falsely translated "mummia" which just meant pitch, not cannibalism@@JV-tx1xw
I find it funny how the English elites hide behind the word British which was an old Welsh word for a Welsh speaker. It was obviously the English speaking empire but we have to delude ourselves and use the word British
@@gabepaixao7249 Still fairly sure they were legitimately trying to poison him on a few occasions... I mean... wouldn't you if you were in their shoes?
Not as bad as the Italian guy who blew up the Nubian pyramids with dynamite in order to get at the treasure inside. Then when he tried to sell the treasure, people just laughed at him because they didn't believe that Africans could have made such sophisticated jewelry.
@@draconicfeline6177 It’s true but his name is forbidden has mentioning him will send every historian into a blind rage which only end when they have drank fresh blood
As a history buff, this makes me mad as angry as when I found out that a construction company in China damage to the Great Wall of China to get through it instead of going around it
"My servants keep trying to poison me! But For the life of me i can't figure out why" I will never understand how on Earth you people can mess up these quotes from videos less than a minute long... Like wtf it's just a few words that are played on a loop why can't you get it right ..
@@schnitzelberry god no, we’re far better than this, it’s what a general idea of stuff was like then, after Cultural Relativism was coined by Franz Boas, which means looking at cultures in their own context and history rather than just a western one, things expanded and have only gotten better since; this is only a very basic overview, but that’s my point, hope it helps :)
@@schnitzelberryNo back then they compared other cultures to Europe as opposed to looking at them as isolated cultures completely separate from there own but sometimes connected
No joke these ol boys were some hard barstewards, Laurence of Arabia literally crossed an desert that the locals considered impassible with his army, one of his loyal fell from his camel, on the journey he personally went back and took him to safety alone, making his impossible journey 2 days longer. There was also diary’s from other explorers wrote which went like “30 of us set off from Southampton, by the time we ended the exhibition there as only me and my new native wife remaining”
Henry Morton Stanley literally killed hundreds of people in Africa, mostly by exhausting the porters to death, shooting tribesmen defending themselves, shooting mutinous porters or engaging in straight up warfare on Congolese people on behalf of Belgium. Livingston did much of the same. And these men were treated as gallant heroes for going into "the dark unexplored land" where tens of millions of people lived.
@@jaysleezy5464You're delusional, they did none of that for them. These are the facts, already proven, what you were taught has been proven wrong. Bet you didn't even know about these individuals until seeing this video. The Europeans didn't bring technology or advancement to these countries, the people already had their established path of progression, interrupted by the Europeans intrusive presence and manipulations of these peoples.
What’s funny is that it took about 100 years between discovery and classification for a certain turtle because they kept eating then on the way back to London 😂
Ehhhhhh that's when they ended the slave trade. But as for actually freeing slaves that wasn't until about 1838. But after ending slavery Britain paid out reparations! ... To the slavers for their lost income 😬
@@zacmumblethunder7466 Yeah good on you... Just remember that slavery wasn't the only abhorrent thing the UK was doing at the time and the UK was still doing abhorrent things for over a century after so maybe don't pat yourself on the back so hard.
@@CollinMcLean I know that, like most countries, there are atrocities in the British past. But that does not detract from the fact that for a long time, Britain stood alone in fighting the slave trade. And I mean _fighting_ it, including stopping African nations solving their tribal dusputes by selling their enemies. We should acknowledge all aspects of the past, both good and bad.
A story that will never not be wild to me is how the Indians, during the industrialization and modernization of the British Raj, would attempt to use cultural relics in construction. On more than one occasion did ancient Hindu and Buddhist relics nearly become something like a makeshift railroad tie. It's kind of like how post Roman Europeans used stones from Roman works to build things with. Except the time gap is much, much bigger.
I got hit with a wave of nostalgia because I had that exact same model capgun when I was a kid... I blew it to smithereens when I figured out I could pour the contents of firecrackers down the barrel and mix crushed up match heads to make a more powerful cap. IDK how I survived childhood.
It's pretty funny to me how gems and stoned became precious to Brits simoly because they actually had no color in England beside gray, beige and, burgundy.
Pretty sure if you had money for precious stones you had money for more expensive dyes of purples reds and blues. Not sure where you've dreamt that one up
"My servants keep trying to poison me."
They're just feeding him food with spices.
One hell of a plot twist 😂. But I'm sure they were tryna poison him.
In fairness, spice is literally poison
@@lonelyteapot858in sufficient quantity, anything is poison
@@lonelyteapot858no, it’s deterrence
It is a well known fact that food with flavor can easily kill the average Englishman
They would name entire colonial possessions after these guys
BEHOLD! GORDONIA!
The English establishment was so colonial.... It even stole the word British away from Welsh speakers 😂😂😂
@@penderyn8794 I mean Britain is England and Wales so it makes sense
Scotland?? Northern Ireland??? Did you forget they exist?@@domowomo2125
Why I say, Prince Rupert, what shall we call this frozen hellscape in North America
Prince Rupert: 🧐🤔🤔🤔
Plot twist: This entire time, he's just been travelling around Ireland.
Believable.
That would explain the servants trying to poison him.
I'm more scared of the millipedes than the servants honestly
😂
The new species were probably the Irish themselves
Adjusted for inflation , 3 young boys in Kabul is now 200 pounds of butter... what has this world come to.
Solid
Yes, solid pounds of butter
Top tier shitpost
Hopefully the current crisis will lower the price by decreasing demand
the demand for 3 young boys has skyrocketed in the last few years and despite what you'd think, it's expected to stay this high. once rich power brokers artificially increase the price it doesn't naturally go down, like with housing. it used to be, when my grandpa was young, you could buy 3 young boys on a single worker's salary WHILE raising three more young boys of your own ("when you want a boy for you love, you get it from your loins. When you want a boy to own, you get it from des moines." That's the song he used to sing to me every night until I left for college, because des moines iowa was the colonial capital of the three young boys trade, not latin america like I assume this partially inacurrate video implies.) now most gen z like me are lucky if we'll ever afford to buy three young boys.@@heinzguderian628
“Quick it’s a new species! Let’s endanger it”
Cold asf lowkey
Literally me as a child
that is in fact a quote from what he said in the video
@@Tinnitusstechnically it's a misquote, "new" was never said
@@skinnybuddha8988 even worse
"This mummy has taken years to discover... i bet he goes good on toast"
He'd make the best colour for the drawing room walls!
so sad this isn't even a joke :(
It's perfect cold medicine too!
@@kmariep2425Chinese cold medicine
european medicine too. They thought they got it from the Arabs but had actually just falsely translated "mummia" which just meant pitch, not cannibalism@@JV-tx1xw
"I don't think these mushrooms are portabella..."
And that, kids, is how we discovered hallucinogenics
I find it funny how the English elites hide behind the word British which was an old Welsh word for a Welsh speaker.
It was obviously the English speaking empire but we have to delude ourselves and use the word British
Uuuuummmm nnnnnnoooooo those are the good ones 😂
Dammit bobby i knew these mushrooms weren’t portabella- hank hill
@@Jordan-ut8wx Haha you know that one too? 😂
"Well, other than the millipedes burrowed into my anus, this expedition has progressed swimmingly" killed me lol
😂😂😂 me too
@@SuthrnBlueEyes Well it sure wasn't the millipedes.
ya, but he put those there..
Fr
I cant 😂😂 bro like "burrowed" them hoes got in there lol
“who’s gonna carry me around?” 💀
thank you for adding a skull emoji to a quote
Well Uutgam of course!
@@Tinnituss"thank you for adding a skull emoji to a quote" 💀
" ' thank you for adding a skull emoji to a quote ' " ☠️@@seandoesnpcshit
It’s the Veruca salt level delivery that pretty much makes it one my favorite lines in the sketch
That poor Sherpa man 😭
😂😂
Poor Utgam
Yeah, Utgam can do better.
Utgam you will be remembered 🫡
Needs must my boy.
"Quick, it's a species! Let's endanger it" got me off guard 💀💀💀
caught me off guard*
@@Gert169my bad
"My servants keep trying to poison me..."
Translation: Seasoned food
Thank you for that explanation. I was so confused by that part until I read your comment and now it made total sense. 😂😊❤
I think it is the results of the seasoned food that makes them think this way. "My defecation is foul, slimy and my butt hurts. Must be poison"
Oh I figured that was just a joke about how living under the British Empire sucks if you aren't British...
@CollinMcLean Nope, it's about how the British discovered, and then subsequently started conquering half the earth for spices.
@@gabepaixao7249 Still fairly sure they were legitimately trying to poison him on a few occasions... I mean... wouldn't you if you were in their shoes?
The man who decided to go look for the ancient city of Troy actually blew up Troy with dynamite while trying to dig low enough to find Troy
Not as bad as the Italian guy who blew up the Nubian pyramids with dynamite in order to get at the treasure inside. Then when he tried to sell the treasure, people just laughed at him because they didn't believe that Africans could have made such sophisticated jewelry.
The man who identified Troy was British (Calvert). The man who destroyed it was German (Schliemann).
Source?
@@draconicfeline6177 It’s true but his name is forbidden has mentioning him will send every historian into a blind rage which only end when they have drank fresh blood
As a history buff, this makes me mad as angry as when I found out that a construction company in China damage to the Great Wall of China to get through it instead of going around it
“My servants keep trying to poison me! I can’t tell why?”
Aka herbs and spices
Europeans introduced chile peppers to india.
@@freneticness6927 really?
"My servants keep trying to poison me! But For the life of me i can't figure out why" I will never understand how on Earth you people can mess up these quotes from videos less than a minute long... Like wtf it's just a few words that are played on a loop why can't you get it right ..
@@nickromo8195He probably paraphrasing bro
Sir: How I love watching the native children play their primitive games🧐
Ütgâm: That’s. . . They’re playing soccer Sir🤨
“Continues to give backshots.”
God this is so painfully accurate as an anthropology major
LOL i know isnt it sad
I’m in high school planning to major in anthropology, is this what I’m signing up for?
@@schnitzelberry god no, we’re far better than this, it’s what a general idea of stuff was like then, after Cultural Relativism was coined by Franz Boas, which means looking at cultures in their own context and history rather than just a western one, things expanded and have only gotten better since; this is only a very basic overview, but that’s my point, hope it helps :)
@@schnitzelberryNo back then they compared other cultures to Europe as opposed to looking at them as isolated cultures completely separate from there own but sometimes connected
Since then we pretend that bongos and spaceships are on the same scale of human achievement
I feel the urge in my blood to endanger a species after going on an expedition…it’s calling to me.
The children yearn for the safari.
it's in the blood of white people. A biological clock to commit crimes against humanity. We can't resist.
@@breezus3928
Tis true
By Jove! We're off to safari in the Serengeti! Bring the porters and get me my ass wiping boy tut tut!
No joke these ol boys were some hard barstewards,
Laurence of Arabia literally crossed an desert that the locals considered impassible with his army, one of his loyal fell from his camel, on the journey he personally went back and took him to safety alone, making his impossible journey 2 days longer.
There was also diary’s from other explorers wrote which went like “30 of us set off from Southampton, by the time we ended the exhibition there as only me and my new native wife remaining”
The “topnum green” got me
But it's British, so it's probably spelled Toppingham or some shit
@@pickyyeeterToppingmodnchesterham
@@pickyyeeter I know but I couldn’t be bothered. But sir you’re right Aahah
It's Tottenham (pronounced totenum)
@@n00bxl71 I'm aware of Tottenham, but we're talking about the (likely) fictitious place mentioned in the video
Rather than millipedes, it should have been "Apart from 3,000 soldiers dying of dysentery..." 😂
3,000 soldiers with dysentery in your anus might be slightly more uncomfortable than a few millipedes
"BY JOVE!!!!" 😂😂😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Fucking love this guy 😂😂😂😂
Fr 😂
hes so good
Yes
british kings be like: let’s make a day celebrating this man
Too right
Nope. It's fine to have statues, street names and branches of Weatherspoons naned to celebrate him, but a day off for the peasants?
*Certainly not*
"Quick it's a species, let's endanger it."
Pretty much what they said with the dodo.
Thats the dutch
... who pretty much endangered themselves over there, at the same time 😢
That’s the 1500s
To be fair the Dodo was an evolutionary cul-de-sac
"Are you trying to poison me?"
"It's a cinnamon."
He sounds like the explorer dude from Flashgitz's "If Pocahontas was historically accurate"
POV: You’re a godless heathen who has gold
When he said “my servants keep trying to poison me but for the life of me I can’t figure out why” I just started belly laughing. That shit was great
“I purchased 3 young boys...” is CRAZY!!!
Right? That prince was a scam artist. A boy goes for a cup of cloves a pop! Butter would get you a girl at the very least
@@thomastakesatollforthedark2231What about for a woman?
@@tristanband4003 a lock of basil
cause it never happened. Slavery was outlawed by Britain in 1803
@@Trollingthemloudlytnd who says he's in Britain?
“What do you mean endangered? It’s right there.”
Nice artifacts you’ve got there. I’ll keep them safe for you in our museum back home.
"Wait, these things are artefacts? I thought they were useless tat!😮"
the only british thing in the british museum are the staff
@@goth-aroace Right, except for the Sutton Hoo find. And the ancient medieval goblets. And the Anglo saxon swords on display.
“Quick! It’s a species! Let’s endanger it”
That’s literally every oil company
Henry Morton Stanley literally killed hundreds of people in Africa, mostly by exhausting the porters to death, shooting tribesmen defending themselves, shooting mutinous porters or engaging in straight up warfare on Congolese people on behalf of Belgium.
Livingston did much of the same.
And these men were treated as gallant heroes for going into "the dark unexplored land" where tens of millions of people lived.
Ye they were infact assholes. Dude makes such a good job making fun of them lol
Idk man, sounds like a gallant explorer to me
@@jaysleezy5464 that's what the Muslims say about Europeans 😂😂
@@jaysleezy5464You're delusional, they did none of that for them. These are the facts, already proven, what you were taught has been proven wrong. Bet you didn't even know about these individuals until seeing this video. The Europeans didn't bring technology or advancement to these countries, the people already had their established path of progression, interrupted by the Europeans intrusive presence and manipulations of these peoples.
Tens of millions of people can live somewhere and it can still be uncivilized. Someone must be a slavery and female genital mutilation enjoyer
And then after he endangers several species and leaves a trail of blood we name some place after him.
to be fair it is because of his expeditions that you enjoy all the privileges you enjoy , including spewing nonsense on youtube
@@devstuff2576exactly
Colombus 🗿
@@devstuff2576 Would gladly give up youtube in a heartbeat to get endangered species back lil buddy
@@devstuff2576lmao ok delulu
Couldnt be more proud of my country. I can only wish we get the strength again to return to what we was
“It’s a species let’s endanger it” lmfao 😂
He brought the Super Adventure Club from South Park to life 😂
“Let’s endanger it” had me frickin DEAD
Do one about Jews in Africa in the 1600s
"Quick its a species!....lets endanger it.."😂
These are the men that won Canada for us thanks guys its pretty chill here.
I thought you were gonna say "quick! Its a spearchucker!" 😭
"oh how i love to watch the narive children play their primitive games"
Imperialist but also fairly wholesome.
hopefully they're clothed
It’s giving Flashgitz historically accurate Pocahontas 😂
“QUICK! ITS A SPECIES! let’s endanger it” got me dead 💀
Honestly, that first line is the winner here.
"Quick, it's a new species, *let's endanger it* " I'm wheezing
3 young boys for a lb of butter got me lmao
Yeah you know how much they cost now, it’s a lot.
“You cannot deny the local custom!”
1800s showed us how mad humanity can be
This reminds me of Key and Peele Regrettably British explorer video
true.
Founder of Nambla
No he's not. He's the founder of Super Adventure Club.
Always 100% accurate depictions
What’s funny is that it took about 100 years between discovery and classification for a certain turtle because they kept eating then on the way back to London 😂
Also british in 1807: slavery is abhorrent and must be ended
Also, British in 1807: and we don't bloody care if nobody agrees with us, _we are going to end it_ .
Ehhhhhh that's when they ended the slave trade. But as for actually freeing slaves that wasn't until about 1838.
But after ending slavery Britain paid out reparations!
...
To the slavers for their lost income 😬
@@CollinMcLean At least it was earlier than the USA freed theirs. And we didn't have a civil war over it.
@@zacmumblethunder7466 Yeah good on you... Just remember that slavery wasn't the only abhorrent thing the UK was doing at the time and the UK was still doing abhorrent things for over a century after so maybe don't pat yourself on the back so hard.
@@CollinMcLean I know that, like most countries, there are atrocities in the British past. But that does not detract from the fact that for a long time, Britain stood alone in fighting the slave trade. And I mean _fighting_ it, including stopping African nations solving their tribal dusputes by selling their enemies.
We should acknowledge all aspects of the past, both good and bad.
A story that will never not be wild to me is how the Indians, during the industrialization and modernization of the British Raj, would attempt to use cultural relics in construction. On more than one occasion did ancient Hindu and Buddhist relics nearly become something like a makeshift railroad tie. It's kind of like how post Roman Europeans used stones from Roman works to build things with. Except the time gap is much, much bigger.
They also used to burn women as late as the 19th century and only stopped by the british but I guess we must ignore this
Van Pelt form Jumanji lol
90% of the koala population were wiped out... thanks alot great contribution 👍
“Look it’s a species, LETS EndanGEr it”
I was looking for this exact comment
Truly a more civilized time
Literally all of these jokes are bangers, 10/10 delivery
I got hit with a wave of nostalgia because I had that exact same model capgun when I was a kid... I blew it to smithereens when I figured out I could pour the contents of firecrackers down the barrel and mix crushed up match heads to make a more powerful cap. IDK how I survived childhood.
Dude you have so much talent ❤
True fans know this is a re upload
You gotta keep the algorithm happy
Real Kyleheads know there are new lines in this one that he cut from the original
This reminds me of that traveller log from that radio station in GTA SA
“Look at these locals, since they’re not us we must treat them as savages, lest they get upset about us doing whatever we want in their home”
Imagine being worth a third of a pound of butter.
You forgot "Quick, its a new species, I can't wait to eat it!"
Darwin moment
That's what a chinese explorer would say
That toy gun gave me so much nostalgia
Truly the age if adventure 💖
Can you please heaps more of this character? Its too fricking funny
Like a 21st century Commander McBragg ❤
Cringe theatre kid
You know it’s gonna be good when the very first line is a zinger.
I would actually argue the millipedes were also progressing in a swimming fashion
This is still better than what Britain is now
At least they we're honest about their colonialism!
Why do you only do these videos about white people
Because only white people were like that.
@@Furry-Studio Man, youre ignorant. Look at Asia.
I believe the first sentence is not necessarily for British only
What a distinguished gentleman 🇬🇧 ☕
Kyle has the ability to accurately portray every human being to ever exist 🤣
That’s weird it kinda feels like he only ever just plays cartoon versions of the worst caricatures of white people.
@@virtueofabsolution7641my victim mentality senses are tingling
@@virtueofabsolution7641well its a short..
Is not suppose to be entertaining?
😂
"QUICK! IT'S A SPECIES! Let's endanger it" wow, starting off strong :D
I was not ready for that millipedes line.
You should do one about Jews that would be hilarious! Or is it only funny when you make fun of White European cultures??
Oh no, ave christus rex is triggered
@@Gorilla8762 oy vey! They figured us out let’s call them “triggered” fuck off dude.
…Cringe…
this dude is a satirical chameleon. how are you an angsty emo kid...a 50s greaser...a frigging moonshiner and now this guy and its all flawless
Drawing room? thats a funny way to pronounce the British Museum
God bless the Brits!!
Just like the Americans today but in another century.
Lost a great opportunity to say who's gonna carry the boats
"Some people have asked 'how we have so many foreign treasures here at the british museum?' Well the answer is quite simple really... Gun beats spear"
this a repost?
Yep
mhm
Some of his older videos are very under-appreciated and he has a much bigger audience now. I think it's smart
This one also has a few new lines in it that he cut from the original
jew
🤣"Let's endanger it" no man
“Quick! It’s a species! Let’s endanger it!”
It's pretty funny to me how gems and stoned became precious to Brits simoly because they actually had no color in England beside gray, beige and, burgundy.
Pretty sure if you had money for precious stones you had money for more expensive dyes of purples reds and blues. Not sure where you've dreamt that one up
That’s not how it works, not in the least.
this jew is so annoying
"but who's gonna carry me around?"
That whiney tone was pitch perfect 😂
As a british explore from
The 1800s i can confirm
Bro has me at “quick it’s a species lets endanger it”
As someone who grew up in colonial williamsburg.....that cap gun looks awfully familiar 😂
What a time to scroll down drinking my coffee just to almost die from the first sentence of the video!
"LET'S ENDANGER IT" that made me laugh out loud