Deuteronomy 5:33 says, "You shall walk in all the way that the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live, and that it may go well with you, and that you may live long in the land that you shall possess". Its simple really, those with a close personal relationship and those who still have a purpose to fulfill on earth.
I understand. And yet, many people (sometimes quite unknowingly) have a picture of God as an impenetrable dome of protection from pain, harm and loss. This can cause some anger toward God, a crisis of faith, despair and so forth. People can definitely lose their way as a result. Most times when that happens, they find their way back. Sometimes that eventuality takes years and even decades. Our best options are to show non-judgment, kindness, gentleness, and self-control (over lecturing them), etc. In short, as guided by the Holy Spirit who indwells us. Thanks for your comment!!
My wife of 16 years was born with spina bifida. She was doing well until she reached the age of 50, at which time her lower spine developed a condition known as tethering, which is the vertebra closing in on the spinal cord, squeezing it. She was not a good candidate for surgery so she suffered debilitating pain from the waist down. We tried a spinal stimulator to disrupt the pain signals - it didn't work. We then tried a pain pump, which delivered a dose of painkillers directly into her spine - it didn't work. Her pain just got worse and worse. I was frantic, I wanted so badly to ease her pain, but nothing we tried had any effect. Finally, the pain got so bad, she didn't want to eat and she essentially starved herself to death. She was in Hospice for her last 10 days and thankfully, they pumped her so full of pain killers she was unconscious at the end. She was 60. For me, her death was a mixed blessing. She had finally escaped her suffering but the love of my life was just gone. That was about 5 months ago and I'm still numb. I forget and lose things constantly. My glasses, my keys, my phone, my hat, my tools, etc. I'm just not 'all there' anymore. I'm retired and receiving my allotted pittance from Social Security, so my bills are paid, but I still work part time rehabbing houses and apartments for whatever "extras" I may want to buy. I have my own house with an incredibly low house payment, so I'll probably never leave here standing up. My dad died 40 years ago, my brother just recently died from cancer, my mom is still living but our past "issues" prevent us from seeing each other, so I have no one left. I'm 100% free to do whatever I want to do, except I don't want to do ANYTHING. And that's ok. I've isolated myself, become a hermit for awhile, and I don't have any emotions to speak of. I'm flat. Deflated, like a balloon that's lost all it's air. Just limp and flaccid and flabby and wrinkled. Going through the motions but with no pleasure, no goals, nothing to look forward to, just....this great big hole where my heart used to be. I'm not dealing with my grief. I know that. I feel as though dealing with it is a final admission that she's never coming back. That sounds ridiculous, I know, but my brain refuses to let her go completely. My inner child wants to believe she's just gone away on a trip somewhere and one day she'll be back. I know cognitively that she is dead and I know she's never coming back, but some little something in my brain just won't - or can't - let her go. I'm stuck, I know I'm stuck and I know I will remain stuck until I break down and just cry my heart out for a couple of days. I can't do it. I don't know why. I keep telling myself that I will do it when I'm ready to do it, not before. Every time I think about her, which is often, I quickly find a distraction and stuff her down inside a little cubby in my head. One of these days, that little cubby will rupture and all the grief and mourning and sadness and reality will hit me hard and I will break down. But not today. Maybe tomorrow.
Hi I watched your video,on marci,I too I lost my wife through suicide,my name is Liam hoskins lreland,2022 of march the date she lost hope, I can't find peace,I am so lonely 14 months on its still the same suicide is oñ my mind all the time,only for the fact that suicide hourts so many people I know what it feels like and I don't want to go there, I would like to some won who knows what it's like,good bless
Thanks for sharing Liam. Oh how we can just feel the pain in your words. Of course you need support with this. On our website, on our Grief Resources and Organizations, you will find organizations that can help widowers and also ones that address suicide. www.mygriefcare.com/ Please check them out if you haven't found something already. Don't do this alone!
No testimony without a test, no message without a mess. Every great man of God in the Bible had great pain and tribulation that made him a great man. God allows pain in our life to change your focus, change your character, and let us know that He is all we need. Romans 5:3-5 ESV 3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
In our lives we will experience some level of suffering and loss. The Romans excerpt you cited is indeed a truth that many of us have experienced (although, probably not at the level of Paul!). And, yet, as people are seeking to grapple with the pain of loss, they are not always ready and able to embrace a scripture like that. If you have found comfort in God's promises such as this, please be aware that it may take some a significant period of time to be able to really hear and understand it. All the best to you!!
Deuteronomy 5:33 says, "You shall walk in all the way that the Lord your God has commanded you, that you may live, and that it may go well with you, and that you may live long in the land that you shall possess".
Its simple really, those with a close personal relationship and those who still have a purpose to fulfill on earth.
I understand. And yet, many people (sometimes quite unknowingly) have a picture of God as an impenetrable dome of protection from pain, harm and loss. This can cause some anger toward God, a crisis of faith, despair and so forth. People can definitely lose their way as a result. Most times when that happens, they find their way back. Sometimes that eventuality takes years and even decades. Our best options are to show non-judgment, kindness, gentleness, and self-control (over lecturing them), etc. In short, as guided by the Holy Spirit who indwells us. Thanks for your comment!!
My wife of 16 years was born with spina bifida. She was doing well until she reached the age of 50, at which time her lower spine developed a condition known as tethering, which is the vertebra closing in on the spinal cord, squeezing it. She was not a good candidate for surgery so she suffered debilitating pain from the waist down. We tried a spinal stimulator to disrupt the pain signals - it didn't work. We then tried a pain pump, which delivered a dose of painkillers directly into her spine - it didn't work. Her pain just got worse and worse. I was frantic, I wanted so badly to ease her pain, but nothing we tried had any effect. Finally, the pain got so bad, she didn't want to eat and she essentially starved herself to death. She was in Hospice for her last 10 days and thankfully, they pumped her so full of pain killers she was unconscious at the end. She was 60.
For me, her death was a mixed blessing. She had finally escaped her suffering but the love of my life was just gone. That was about 5 months ago and I'm still numb. I forget and lose things constantly. My glasses, my keys, my phone, my hat, my tools, etc. I'm just not 'all there' anymore.
I'm retired and receiving my allotted pittance from Social Security, so my bills are paid, but I still work part time rehabbing houses and apartments for whatever "extras" I may want to buy. I have my own house with an incredibly low house payment, so I'll probably never leave here standing up. My dad died 40 years ago, my brother just recently died from cancer, my mom is still living but our past "issues" prevent us from seeing each other, so I have no one left. I'm 100% free to do whatever I want to do, except I don't want to do ANYTHING. And that's ok. I've isolated myself, become a hermit for awhile, and I don't have any emotions to speak of. I'm flat. Deflated, like a balloon that's lost all it's air. Just limp and flaccid and flabby and wrinkled. Going through the motions but with no pleasure, no goals, nothing to look forward to, just....this great big hole where my heart used to be.
I'm not dealing with my grief. I know that. I feel as though dealing with it is a final admission that she's never coming back. That sounds ridiculous, I know, but my brain refuses to let her go completely. My inner child wants to believe she's just gone away on a trip somewhere and one day she'll be back. I know cognitively that she is dead and I know she's never coming back, but some little something in my brain just won't - or can't - let her go.
I'm stuck, I know I'm stuck and I know I will remain stuck until I break down and just cry my heart out for a couple of days. I can't do it. I don't know why. I keep telling myself that I will do it when I'm ready to do it, not before. Every time I think about her, which is often, I quickly find a distraction and stuff her down inside a little cubby in my head. One of these days, that little cubby will rupture and all the grief and mourning and sadness and reality will hit me hard and I will break down. But not today. Maybe tomorrow.
Hi I watched your video,on marci,I too I lost my wife through suicide,my name is Liam hoskins lreland,2022 of march the date she lost hope, I can't find peace,I am so lonely 14 months on its still the same suicide is oñ my mind all the time,only for the fact that suicide hourts so many people I know what it feels like and I don't want to go there, I would like to some won who knows what it's like,good bless
Thanks for sharing Liam. Oh how we can just feel the pain in your words. Of course you need support with this. On our website, on our Grief Resources and Organizations, you will find organizations that can help widowers and also ones that address suicide. www.mygriefcare.com/ Please check them out if you haven't found something already. Don't do this alone!
No testimony without a test, no message without a mess. Every great man of God in the Bible had great pain and tribulation that made him a great man. God allows pain in our life to change your focus, change your character, and let us know that He is all we need.
Romans 5:3-5 ESV
3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
In our lives we will experience some level of suffering and loss. The Romans excerpt you cited is indeed a truth that many of us have experienced (although, probably not at the level of Paul!). And, yet, as people are seeking to grapple with the pain of loss, they are not always ready and able to embrace a scripture like that. If you have found comfort in God's promises such as this, please be aware that it may take some a significant period of time to be able to really hear and understand it. All the best to you!!