A little something for you listeners! It was the summer break, where all the girls go out to spend their summer break together with friends. Going to beaches in bikinis or going out clubbing till it’s late. Meanwhile me, an introvert who has little to no friends. It was hard to make friends anyways when no one has the same interest as I do, I don’t blame them tho. What I like isn’t really considered as “normal” or typically saying a “trend”. I’m not saying “I’m not like other girls”, like come on. I read mangas, enjoy watching movies or any dramas I can find on Netflix. I’m just as typical as any other introverts out there, just.. more dissociated with life at the moment. Why you might ask? I don’t know, maybe it’s because i just couldn’t fit in anywhere no matter how hard I tried. It’s alright tho, I’ll figure something out. I always have been, like being rebellious towards anything and anyone. FUCK LIFE I’m going yolo! Is what I would say if I was a little bit more extroverted. I mean, truth be told it might not sound half bad. Life is anything but a temporary path, we’ll all die so I might as well die without regret right? It was decided, so I packed my bags and left my room. Grabbing my skateboard as I made my way through town, I had my spray cans ready. I will go and live life with no consequences, I’m getting tired of life when all I do is be a shut in most of the time. Away from society, even my own friends sometimes. I will admit the things I do sometimes concern them, apparently attempting to burn the house down along with yourself wasn’t normal. I always thought it was.. oh well. I was only when I was 16, I’m currently 21. All of my friends who were ongoing with their studies were all enjoying the summer break, making choices I can guarantee will regret sooner or later. I know I’m an asshole for not saying anything to them, but what can I do? They won’t listen to me regardless. They’ll just think a “freak” is trying to be a party pooper, I’ve tried to warn nah people when I was younger and well.. you know how it ended up. Shunned away or ignored. I wished that things could’ve been so much more easier if I was more social. What did I do wrong to be hated this badly? Maybe I’ll never understand, maybe I will. Only time will tell, but even so I don’t want to stick around and find out. Because I don’t exactly want to live anymore, I’m just waiting till I get into an accident. But for now I’ll remain here just the way I like it. A phone in my hand, lying in bed at 3am in the morning while I do some pretty questionable things. Like arguing with a random kid online, or sobbing over a sad video and forgetting about it afterwards. Maybe that’s how I’ll spend the rest of the summer break, just wasting my life away until I die from something. (Pls don’t follow this lifestyle and get some help! If you need someone to talk too I’m always here!)
I really want you to not get into an accident, but not wanting the live in the world anymore is something valid to feel. Especially when your life isn't the brightest despite everything. Friends are such an important thing in life, or to generalize it into an understandable word of its concept, relationships. I also want to have a deep bonding relationship. I want to be the couples of my comics, where they go through such trauma and conflicts, inner or external, sad ending or happy, but to embrace each other despite of their situation. But I don't really know how to love someone, I also don't understand love. Sometimes when my parents hug me I want to feel something, it's like I'll only feel something when they are gone but they're not gone yet so what is it? I'm not the best of conversations too, I'm always awkward and judgmental, I know people go through the same feelings too, but it just feels like I'm alone, observing them. Or is it that I'm being observed? I just want to take my perspective of life, I cannot live off of hallucinations anyways, so that's why I think I'm the observer, not the observed. I make mistakes, having failed friendships, saying "EWW" when my cousin's fiance said he was four years older than my cousin, farting in class, fantasizing stuff that are pretty 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂, but it's not like I can dig up a hole and disappear. I'm too much of a pvssy to jump off a cliff anyways when life got too tough. Life isn't too tough yet for me or it is idk, and that thought scares me. Will I live someday where I'd physically and subconsciously want to die? Not even just mentally? I wonder what gets me going in life, knowing things like a gamma ray burst could wipe out all life on earth instantly with no warning (an ultra powerful supernova that sends blast of gamma ray across galaxy at light speed that if you get hit on could instantly be erased basically meaning we can all suddenly die) maybe we humans are masochist, that'd make a lot of sense. But you're still here, maybe still lying in bed at 3am in the morning right? Wash your face, drink some water, stare at the ceiling for a bit. Hello you are still alive, if you are there tomorrow or not doesn't matter, but you're here.
This playlist gave me a little burst of happiness. Like a orange flavored effervescent tablet in cold water.（๑¯◡¯๑）
I'm going on strike against this thing called life is so real
A little something for you listeners!
It was the summer break, where all the girls go out to spend their summer break together with friends. Going to beaches in bikinis or going out clubbing till it’s late. Meanwhile me, an introvert who has little to no friends. It was hard to make friends anyways when no one has the same interest as I do, I don’t blame them tho. What I like isn’t really considered as “normal” or typically saying a “trend”. I’m not saying “I’m not like other girls”, like come on. I read mangas, enjoy watching movies or any dramas I can find on Netflix. I’m just as typical as any other introverts out there, just.. more dissociated with life at the moment. Why you might ask? I don’t know, maybe it’s because i just couldn’t fit in anywhere no matter how hard I tried. It’s alright tho, I’ll figure something out. I always have been, like being rebellious towards anything and anyone. FUCK LIFE I’m going yolo! Is what I would say if I was a little bit more extroverted. I mean, truth be told it might not sound half bad. Life is anything but a temporary path, we’ll all die so I might as well die without regret right? It was decided, so I packed my bags and left my room. Grabbing my skateboard as I made my way through town, I had my spray cans ready. I will go and live life with no consequences, I’m getting tired of life when all I do is be a shut in most of the time. Away from society, even my own friends sometimes. I will admit the things I do sometimes concern them, apparently attempting to burn the house down along with yourself wasn’t normal. I always thought it was.. oh well. I was only when I was 16, I’m currently 21. All of my friends who were ongoing with their studies were all enjoying the summer break, making choices I can guarantee will regret sooner or later. I know I’m an asshole for not saying anything to them, but what can I do? They won’t listen to me regardless. They’ll just think a “freak” is trying to be a party pooper, I’ve tried to warn nah people when I was younger and well.. you know how it ended up. Shunned away or ignored. I wished that things could’ve been so much more easier if I was more social. What did I do wrong to be hated this badly? Maybe I’ll never understand, maybe I will. Only time will tell, but even so I don’t want to stick around and find out. Because I don’t exactly want to live anymore, I’m just waiting till I get into an accident. But for now I’ll remain here just the way I like it. A phone in my hand, lying in bed at 3am in the morning while I do some pretty questionable things. Like arguing with a random kid online, or sobbing over a sad video and forgetting about it afterwards. Maybe that’s how I’ll spend the rest of the summer break, just wasting my life away until I die from something.
(Pls don’t follow this lifestyle and get some help! If you need someone to talk too I’m always here!)
I really want you to not get into an accident, but not wanting the live in the world anymore is something valid to feel. Especially when your life isn't the brightest despite everything. Friends are such an important thing in life, or to generalize it into an understandable word of its concept, relationships. I also want to have a deep bonding relationship. I want to be the couples of my comics, where they go through such trauma and conflicts, inner or external, sad ending or happy, but to embrace each other despite of their situation. But I don't really know how to love someone, I also don't understand love. Sometimes when my parents hug me I want to feel something, it's like I'll only feel something when they are gone but they're not gone yet so what is it? I'm not the best of conversations too, I'm always awkward and judgmental, I know people go through the same feelings too, but it just feels like I'm alone, observing them. Or is it that I'm being observed? I just want to take my perspective of life, I cannot live off of hallucinations anyways, so that's why I think I'm the observer, not the observed. I make mistakes, having failed friendships, saying "EWW" when my cousin's fiance said he was four years older than my cousin, farting in class, fantasizing stuff that are pretty 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂, but it's not like I can dig up a hole and disappear. I'm too much of a pvssy to jump off a cliff anyways when life got too tough. Life isn't too tough yet for me or it is idk, and that thought scares me. Will I live someday where I'd physically and subconsciously want to die? Not even just mentally? I wonder what gets me going in life, knowing things like a gamma ray burst could wipe out all life on earth instantly with no warning (an ultra powerful supernova that sends blast of gamma ray across galaxy at light speed that if you get hit on could instantly be erased basically meaning we can all suddenly die) maybe we humans are masochist, that'd make a lot of sense. But you're still here, maybe still lying in bed at 3am in the morning right? Wash your face, drink some water, stare at the ceiling for a bit. Hello you are still alive, if you are there tomorrow or not doesn't matter, but you're here.
I get into arguments in comments sections too!
Blewoo back again with a good playlist 🙂↕️
This is such a good playlist!!!
i feel like this after i do smth wrong💀
Yippee!!!!❤❤
hope you doing OK!