✨CLEAN WITH ME 2024 MOTIVATION✨ & New Years Intentions
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- Опубліковано 15 січ 2024
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Give the memories to your boys later on! Although y’all aren’t together, the boys will cherish to see their parents were once together and happy
Copy the photos to give each child when they're older photos of you both make a photo album or put photos on cd roms you can put up to 200 photos on a single rom they will cherish them I wish I'd had photos of my parents together as both of them are deceased
I think you should keep them for your boys, they will really appreciate it someday, if you just pack them away and give them to them someday! They will treasure them probably
I was going to comment this. My husbands parents are divorced but he loves the pics that he has of them (his mom gave them to him recently)
Agreed. My parents divorce finalized when I was just over a year old and my Mum was so hurt about it that all photos og them together were destroyed. I understand why but I grew up not even knowing what my dad looked like and that stung. Of course, I imagined that he looked and behaved like Jesus, talk about disappointment when I did meet him at age 11! 😂
Agree! My parents are divorced and I literally have one photo of them together when they were happy together. I wish I had more of them together.
As a kid of divorced parents I really treasure the pictures I do have of my parents together. Their story is technically the beginning of my story so it's nice to have those to look at. I can also say my brother really appreciates those pictures too so it's not just a female thing 😂
Keep the pictures for the boys! I wish my parents would have kept theirs pictures together so we could have images of them - together. It’s nice to see them in one image the older we all get. Maybe do a “for the boys box” and store the good ones there. It could also just be me.
I agree, a memory box for the children to check in the future is a great idea. Just putting everything away in a box and forget about until the children are older. It's obvious she's not ready to make decisions now, and that's ok.
In my opinion, I'm with the group that says keep them for your boys. At some point they'll want to see old photos and eventually show their kids.❤
I went through a divorce with my son's father, and I too had the same process as you with the deleting the memories. But short story first My son's father passed away and I wish that I kept more photos of our life together for the sake of my son. My son had a very hard time dealing with his passing and all I wanted to do is give him all that I had to comfort him. I hope this helps.
Speaking as a child of divorced parents, I was a toddler when they separated and I would be thrilled to see photos of them together. The photos no longer exist sadly 😥
Hi, Mai. It is good to have you back! I've been divorced for a while and have 2 now-grown kids. I would put the memorabilia aside for a while (like a few years if possible). Obviously, feelings are raw and will be for a while. I recently went through stuff (I have been divorced for more than 20 years (and moved 4x in that period. But I found that there was a lot I wanted to keep for my children. They had 2 parents and I want them to have the pictures of us together as a family because it was part of their lives.
As someone who's been through a separation and sharing a child with that person. I kept a few pictures so I can give them to our child when they ask about my past and how I met their father. There will be some pictures that will get you emotional so I suggest you go through them when your kids aren't home and take lots of breaks so it won't be too much.
Hurray! A real video - I really miss your full videos (not a big fan of shorts) please make more ❤
If you wanted to, you could probably get the pics digitized and saved separately (ex. in a hard drive). Yes, it could be a little pricey but it’s a one time expense and you may be comfortable getting rid of the physical pics. If down the road your boys want the pictures, they would have access but you aren’t physically saving something you don’t feel great about.
Love the long video!!! Bring em back! You’re my fav! ❤️
Mai the last time I watched a video of yours was when my daughter was pregnant n you gave me grandma tips. My grandson is now 3 n I found you again. I am so sorry about yr divorce My take on the memory box is to keep it for the kids to show them that at one time you were a happy family. I wish you best in the future n enjoy yr trip.
I have gotten rid of mostly everything in my life that had bad memories. I don’t like having that energy around me. Learned that in my mid 30s. Tossed hundreds of pictures, all my yearbooks, cards, books, “sentimental” stuff that caused bad feelings. Feel much lighter because of it. I would put it all in a box and hide it in your attic. Set an alert for 1-2 years for now on your phone to revisit it. If you still feel the same way at that point then maybe it’s time to get rid of it. But your feelings may change in that time.
I think box up the memorabilia and mark it so you don't open it accidentally. Your boys may like to visualize things from your past or see how they look like their dad. You can always get rid of it another time, but you can't get them back.
Welcome back, Mai. I hope we see more of you this year. I need to update my cleaning cart. Put the photos away for awhile. Deal with them later. Take your time. Some photos may be important to your kids when they grow up.
Girl! I LOVE your shorts but REALLY love your full length videos! Keep em coming! ❤
I separated from my ex in 1998. My kids were 2 & 3. I kept photos in a photo box in the closet. They were still accessible in case my kids wanted to look through them. Once grown, I gave my kids the photos. They are out of my house and my kids have the memories they cherish, even though they were memories I definitely did not cherish.
My mom and dad got divorced when I was a baby so I have no memories of them together but it’s still nice to have some of their wedding/first year of my life photos. I did declutter a lot of them. My mom and stepdad divorced after 26 years of marriage and that one hit me harder and I am SO glad I have the memories to look back on as he’s still part of my life and they are why I have my half brothers. I would separate the ones of you and your ex from just you. Put the ones of you and your ex in a special box for your kids later and you never have to see it again. The ones of just you keep in a different box for looking back on later.
Keep all the ones of you and your ex with the boys! And keep a few of your wedding because your sons will likely want to see a few pictures of that one day :)
Okay so my ex and I weren’t together anywhere near as long, however we did go through some pretty big life events together. My advice would be to hang onto any pictures and other items, because some day you may feel differently. Maybe you won’t be able to look at pictures and think “oh that was a beautiful day spent with him” but you might remember the small things that will always bring you joy.
Keep the pics. You will want to share with the kids. They'll have projects for school. Plus They'll ask questions about things that happened in your lives. Eventually, you will be able to look back fondly at your past.
I would definitely go through the box and separate all the things that bring that negative vibe and label it for the boys to go through when they are older and if they want to trash it at that time than they can but at least you don’t have to deal with it at that point
Something that has been therapeutic for me of pictures with my ex husband is shittly editing him our of the photos and keeping myself in them. They look terrible, but I now laugh instead of cry when I look at the memories.
My mom only kept one photo (from the wedding) of her with her first husband. She gave it to my brother (the only child they had together) when he was adult and he was happy to get that.
You always motivate me to clean with your fun attitude. With regards to pictures, someone once told me to give time time. You are going through the grieving 🔁cycle and things will feel different as time goes on. Hang in there Mai.
So glade your back
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Skiing vacation sounds fun!
Yes, I have missed your videos so much.
Enjoyed the hang out, Mai. Felt like old times. Have fun on your ski trip! 😀
YOU JUST MADE MY DAY!!!!!
Nice to see you back!
Yayyyyyyyy!!! A full video! Thank you 💗and I need to try thrive market again so I will use your code/link if I do
I would pack the memorabilia in those black heavy-duty boxes and stored them in the back of the attic - like behind the shelves; not one of the places you see every time you walk in. At some point in the future, it won't hurt that much and you'll feel strong enough to go through them.
Glad your back ❤
Happy to see a new video from you, Mai. We've missed you!
Finally!!! Yay
Could not wait until you posted again... my fav youtuber☺️☺️
Also perfect timing. I have not had the motivation to clean my room and declutter my kitchen. Definetly overdue for a cleaning. This will be perfect to get me moving.
Mai's cleaning service! ❤ love it
She’s baackkkkk 🎉
🔥🔥🔥 Burn the wedding pictures and stuff with some friends! I forgot what you did with your wedding dress.
Yesss. Please more longer videos 😊 I missed them
So good to see you back, Mai! I've missed you and hope you'll be on UA-cam more frequently this year. Your year in dating sounds like a great idea. Have fun on your ski trip! XXOO ❤️
Yay I’ve missed your longer videos! You are one of my favorite to watch because you keep mom life real!
Definitely save the memories for your boys. They need to see those pictures.
Always love how REAL your videos are!! Thank you for sharing your content!!!
For the attic question of the day, I hope that as you heal, those old pictures will be memories that you can look at and not feel triggered by! (Also been in a similar situation!) sending you lots of positive vibes!!
I’m in a similar situation and don’t want the photos but I’ve saved them for our son if he wants too see them one day.
I can’t believe you’re looking through that bin of memories! I literally just watched your video of you filling that bin. Lol
Adding avocado to the burger for more nutrients sounds like a win!
I enjoyed this video ! Very nice and generous that you hosted those 14 people!
Your home is so beautiful!
I used to buy from thrive market and it is a super cool thing to do….one day I’ll go back to them…..btw…great video❤ I was married 32 years and never regretted getting divorced….we are civil to each other….but my sons are the best thing that ever happened to me….I gave away a lot of the together pics…to my ex or sons and then I kept just the ones that gave me happy memories…the others got tossed….photo albums went through heavy organizing…most were tossed…I also took pics on my iPad and threw away the actual photo…less stuff….😊
My parents divorced and I still appreciated having family pictures and pictures of my parents before I was born. I know it's easier said than done to keep pictures around for your kids, but there will be a time when you'll feel nothing (or less anger, sadness, annoyance, etc) when you see pictures of your ex.
I already miss your long videos. Even though I watch all your short videos, I already miss the long ones, thank you 🫶🫶🫶
I would make a small album for the kids to keep in their rooms, and I would ask my mom to keep the rest of the pictures so the kids can go through them if they would like. I totally get not wanting to have bad memories in your house.
Yay! Love your cleaning videos 😊
Nice to see a longer video from you! Thanks! For the Q and A, Are you going skiing with a gentleman friend? And do you have another job? Thanks, Cindy 💗🌻
My previous life was from 16-35 with 3 kids, so almost the same as you 😊 I kept one wedding picture and some pictures from just me or me and the kids during that time, and of course the kids have their own photo albums. All the rest I shoved in a box and gave it to him. I'm 53 now and still don't regret my decision. You do whatever works for you, and that will be the best solution 😘
Mai Ziiiiiiiiimmmyyyyy!
Super motivating, great video! I would keep the box out of sight for a couple of years and then go through and declutter them. It sounds like it’s still a bit too soon, and maybe later you can detach him from vacation memories
I love the cleaning stuff in a cart
I hope you vid and post your 'zimmy' one of these days. I'll bet its adorable. I just love metaphors. This is such a good one. Its a metafive or even a metasix. Way beyond phor.
What?!?!? A VIDEO!!! Love it!!!!!❤❤
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I use this cart for kids books. Keep the pictures, show them to your kids.
I've kept the photos of myself and my ex for our son. We had a bad relationship , he wasnt a very nice person and we were both very young and immature. But after 20 years we get along fine. Seeing him or talking to him doesn't bother me at all. Took a few years but were on good terms.
Mai idk what it is but my 18 month old son loves your videos 😂❤️
You are so strong. Not married yet but I haven't handled break ups well with one particular person let alone getting a divorce. I'd probably be really down but of course it depends on the matters that led up to it. I'm glad you've made your peace with it and are happier for it.
Save the memorabilia for your boys. They will treasure them. If he’s not in your mind, you’ve blocked him out, put the lids on the totes and put them in the attic or basement and leave it.
Happy New Year to you and your little family Mai! Hope all of you receive many blessings this year and for many years to come!!❤🥰
You are so beautiful! Take care. You will find someone of your dreams ❤❤ I did when I was 44. Divorced twice, but now I'm so happy and thankful. Put God first❤❤❤
Don’t throw away the memories! Store them away for now. There will be a time when you don’t look back on those memories as negatively as you do now
Agree with the others. Save for the boys later for them to divide up the photos as they like.
Finally !!!! Yay
😁😁🙌🏻🙌🏻
As a divorced mom of 3 kids now grown, I did keep the pictures of their dad and me with them .
I wanted so badly to chuck them, but he’s still their father. The kids were very young when we got divorced, but I regress now my children are very happy that I’ve kept them. Especially my daughter, I think when my boys get married if they choose to or they are a lot older they will want to reminisce with each other.
Keep the pictures, I even had our wedding pictures, my kids got a kick out of those, how young we were. Keep them for the kids, they can decide what they want to do with them
Shoving that ish to the back of the attic for another time is a great idea 😂
So glad to see your post ! Been missing you. ❤❤ Put the photos away for now. Deal with it later. You boys will be interested in them so DON’T just throw them out. Some day you too may change your mind. Trust me I’m 62 now and now my EX and I are just grandparents to our grandkids, so that’s all good. Besides today it’s not a priority.
Yes to the dating video!
I’m late on this, but save the stuff for your kids! My parents divorced in the 90s. When my mom died a few years back, I cherished those wedding pictures. I totally understand why my parents wouldn’t want those pics, but for me, it’s my history and it’s 2 people I love very much.
I wouldn’t worry about that memory bin for now. Everything is still too fresh if it’s bringing on any stress. I would shove it in the back somewhere and see if I can better deal with it in 6 months. If not, put it back and find another time lol
I agree with the majority in the comments section. Keep the photos for the boys. Remember that they still love you and their dad even if you two aren't together anymore. Would love to see the attic re-organize if you plan on filming that!
Also, my intentions for 2024 include making myself and my health a priority. I've really fallen off the wagon when it comes to my good habits. I lost over 15 lbs and dropped two pant sizes last year, only to gain back 12 lbs over the holidays and barely squeeze into my new jeans. 🤦🏻♀
Zout is my favorite stain remover
I would say give it and yourself time. Looking at them right now today may give you bad feelings but maybe in 5 years you could look at them and go ok it’s my childhood/ high school times. I wouldn’t get rid of them as they are such a big part of your life. Or if even in how many years you still don’t like to look at them, for sure keep some memories for your kids as they will enjoy looking back on how young you both were and the different styles and times.
Can you do an update on how you liked the products you tested out
So I was married from 17-31, my high school sweetheart, 4 kids, and when we divorced as far as memorabilia you can get rid of some but when your ready for pictures which are the hardest part, keep what you think the kids will want and make a small box for them in the future. Facebook definitely make a new one and please please please do a de clutter organization video!! Lol hope it helped and love you!
Was w my ex husband since college & now divorced for over 8 yrs. I think u should wait before making any decisions on the photos. Many u can share w ur boys. I got rid of a majority of wedding pix & albums(had tons that friends made for me too). Saved one for my boys. Haven’t dealt w the albums that I have from vacays w ex before kids but I’m not worried about them nor ok not traumatized from my ex either. Good luck ur doing amazing!!❤
Not divorced, but my instinct would be to wait 3-5 years before you go through those photos. You'll have more clarity down the line about what you do and don't want to keep when the divorce doesn't feel so fresh. (Also, my parents are happily married, but have pretty much zero photos of the first 20 years of their marriage and it makes me as a kid so sad. Your kids will probably love to see those photos one day, even if they're painful for you.)
I'd make it a project. I would have 3 or 5 bins (you, ex, boys individually/ corporately) and a trash can. This way you can tackle item by item as what you want to keep, what is just of your ex for your ex, and what could be you two together for your boys as a corporate box or boy by boy individually. I'm sure you have some pictures of just you and other friends that don't include your ex that you want to keep and need to be separated from the pictures that are of or include your ex. But removing your ex's pictures from your life sounds healthy.
I clicked so fast!! 🩵
I also went through basically the same thing as you. It took me a few years to be able to not go through the memory bins without emotionally shutting down, but eventually I paired it down to one rubber maid smaller tote. I do have a daughter and maybe she would want that stuff, I’m unsure but I’ll let her decide to keep or throw it once she is older. Also I threw away anything that didn’t fit in there like giant wedding photos… no one needs those around 😜
The tub of pictures & memorabilia can easily go unseen & unnoticed for years & years in a corner of the attic 😂 just leave them til your 100% certain on what you want to do with them.
I’m so sorry to hear about that memento box thing. That is super tough. On the one hand I’m sure your boys will treasure it some days on the other the amount of stress and anxiety it brings you up would say get it completely out of your house, maybe give it to your moms for a few years. I’m sure soon you’ll be married to the guy of your dreams and then if you randomly run into that box it won’t hurt as much hopefully. I totally get what you mean about feeling like you wasted all your time but I promise that’s not what it was. It completely shaped you to ego you are today
You have a beautiful home
Loved this so much. I would say toss those old memories, that’s your past, it made you who you are today but doesn’t have to make your future. ❤❤❤❤
My parents were married 10+ years and divorced when I was a baby, and I really appreciate all of the photos and home videos I have of them together. It’s like getting to learn about my history, something that is a part of me but I wasn’t present for. That said my mom stuck them on a high shelf in my childhood closet where she wouldn’t have to see them or make a whole big deal of showing them to me, but knew I’d discover them when I was old enough to go poking around up there lol
Your boys might want it. Keep enough for them to decide in the future.
I’m kind of in your situation just still in the marriage.
Three kids, I’m 34 about to be 35. We have been married for ten years and probably shouldn’t have but we found out I was pregnant two days before nursing school graduation. We both are figuring out where to go next..
I say keep these things but keep them away from you, put up somewhere. Your kids may want them one day. I love the pictures I have of my parents who divorced when I was six and they needed to divorce. But as their only child, I like having their old random pictures. Maybe toss certain ones and keep some for them in a little box. You are awesome and so glad I found your channel again! Second video watching and I’m like dang this is all super relatable on my level. lol 😆
I wonder if it’d help to put dryer sheets in the bags with the mattresses to keep them smelling fresh and clean?
So I went through the memorabilia thing with an ex husband who was my husband during twenty years. During a long time, I couldn’t even look at the photos. But I kept them for my sons. I don’t care for these photos even now, but I wouldn’t be the person I am today if I hadn’t lived all this. My sons don’t have the same feeling as mine of course, and after all, it’s their father. So if I was in your shoes, I would put everything in a box and would keep them for when your children will be old enough to appreciate them, especially as you have boys, they will need to see how their father was before the divorce. I have two sons too and I see how they react as adults.
That’s my point of view on this matter, now you do whatever you want with it.
With my 1st husband from 20 to 35. Got rid of all pics with him including all wedding photos except one with just me and Mom. Never looked back, never missed them. (I’m 60 now). For ones that contain a child, I would put a few in their memory boxes and discard the rest.
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Ex’s toothbrush on the top shelf 🪥
I do feel like you need to keep the photos for your sons. That way they know mommy and daddy had a happy point of their life later on when they get to questioning things more. But I’d definitely put them in a fire proof box in a dark corner of your house you won’t think about them until you have to!