You Bought The Lie
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- Опубліковано 26 вер 2024
- I'm always impressed by a good semantic stop sign. Thanks to BetterHelp for sponsoring this video - get 10% off your first month with my link betterhelp.com...
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My name is Jay Swanson - I'm an American writer living in Paris on an artist visa. Paris (yes the one in France) has been my home for years now and I have every intention of staying here for as long as they'll have me. I write science-fiction and fantasy, vlogged daily for 3+ years, and love pizza a little too much. Now I make videos about visiting Paris, traveling in Europe, and try to share what I've learned along the way. I hope you enjoyed what you found.
Links are affiliate links where they can be - meaning if you click through them and buy something, I'll get some pennies. Thanks! (The FTC wants me to tell you that up front)
Patron Producer: Matt Rogers
Edited by: Cognitive Dissonance
Music by: @dcuttermusic
Can you think of anymore examples of semantic stop signs? Let me know. Use my link betterhelp.com/jayswanson to get 10% off your first month of therapy through BetterHelp - and thanks to them for supporting my channel for so long 🥂
'That won't solve the problem.' This one drives me SO crazy. Especially popular in terms of shooting down sustainability in any form from social to environmental. No. . . ONE thing is never going to solve the whole problem but neither is shooting down perfectly logical steps along the way. From where I'm sitting we could use all the logical steps we can get our hands (er feet`?) on.
I think they’re very common within families - “we don’t go there” semantic stop signs, especially when kids are teenagers and starting to question whatever they’ve been raised with.
"I'd rather have questions that can't be answered, than answers that can't be questioned" ~Richard Feynman
Thanks for this video, Jay. It was very thoughtful and well thought out.
Great quote
Honestly, people who say "I'll pray for you", unsolicited, and not in good faith (pun very much intended) always comes off arrogant and smarmy.
I agree it's like that "well bless your little heart" an indictment on you and they really aren't praying for you, they are just saying that.. they most likely don't pray at all, it's just words
It can be sincere, but it’s definitely within their system of values and a bit, to a lot dismissive. I come from a rather religious extended family. My father and I are not. The 1 positive thing in my family, they focus on how people behave, and not what they say alone. So, while I got the dismissive, “I’ll pray for you”, statement through my 20’s, it became a statement of care, and not dismissive, as I became an older adult. We’re all just trying to live our best life.
It’s incredibly heartening to see therapy, especially for men, being normalized and lauded as healthy.
Hope for humanity in the healing journeys of millions of humans.
Keep on keeping on
Thanks! And yeah, if I can do my little part, then I'm happy to
You are the reason I started therapy. Thank you Jay for intimacy you share with us on your path through life.
that is awesome..
I hope it helps you find your way to where you want and need to go 🥂
There’s a fine line between healthy reflection and rumination and anyone who is seriously introspective is probably going to go on the wrong side of that line sometimes, but I greatly appreciate your honesty and your willingness to expose this side of your life.
Thanks David! Better to err to far over the line sometimes than never risk crossing it (in my ever so humble opinion)
1:42 "but while your praying". 🤣
5:33 As a francophile, it’s no wonder I came across your page. This video regarding “the lie” post, totally earned you a follow. Bravo!! 👏 I look forward to your content.
Thank you! Happy to have you along for the journey
Thanks for your video. My "enlightenment" and "being set free" came from years of therapy with a very good psychologist and not from prayer. Therapy has been one of my most rewarding and healing experiences. Thankfully, walking away from my Christian faith was remarkably easy. In any religion, the Deity is a perfect construct of a narcissist. And it is my consistent experience that most faithful followers, themselves, are toxic narcissists. Finally, never fear "over-thinking" the things that challenge us. The mere capacity to over-think demonstrates our remarkable capability to explore, debate, and understand. Cheers from Canada.
Thanks for sharing! Glad it was easier for you to make that choice
Part of this discussion brings me to Eric Rohmer’s “Ma nuit chez Maud” and the reflection on Blaise Pascal , ethics and Pascal’s Wager. It also brings me to reflect on Soren Kierkegaard , the “leap of faith”, and a review of the film “The seventh seal” by Igmar Bergman. These reflections are all part of a long line of philosophical reflections on our short time on this mortal coil. All the best to you Jay on your spiritual journey, I appreciate your candor in sharing your humanity with us all.
As a christian, it saddens me that the christian men in your life didn't listen well to your doubts, questions, and even feelings. I have had many doubts about my faith as well (it's apart of the process of actually having faith) however, I fortunately had men in my life who listened to me in the midst of my doubts, and decided to have a conversation rather than push an agenda. As an "overthinker" myself, I don't think you think too much. I think you are much more aware than most people about the questions that lie deep within everyones hearts (including most christians), and being able to realize the questions that lie deep inside is a gift that not everyone has. Keep asking questions, don't ever stop. Also, whoever in your life said that therapy is bad... may need therapy some themselves.
Most religions have an excommunication or shunning process. Most religions do not have a complaints department and sneakily do not publicize apostasy. Apostasy is the opposite of excommunication. Now THERE'S a semantic stop sign! In regular speech, excommunication is "You're Fired" while apostasy is "I quit". Apostasy is very freeing especially if done proactively.
Thank you for your vulnerability and realness 🙂
Always!
Perfect timing! My hubby and I were just discussing the "ignoring a problem" situation at his previous job. Also in recovery (and therapy!) from a childhood filled with too much whitewashing/ sticking head in the sand / "good boys just follow the rules and trust God's purpose" religiosity. Growth is good. Knowledge is good. Questioning is good. (That's why we HAVE the ability to formulate thoughts and be introspective. Congrats on your progress. You have no one to apologize to.
Keep being you, man. Whatever track you're on, it's the right one cause you're a good guy.
Thanks 🥂
Great video once again!😀😀 You're absolutely stunning in this one as well. I'm not sure what you've been up to lately, but whatever it is, it's working wonders. The subject of the video is highly relatable, touching on religious trauma and the process of shifting one's perspective on truth. I'm currently navigating my own journey of truth and religious trauma, and I can attest that seeking the help of a therapist does make a significant difference.
Hi, Jay! As a Christian it saddens me that so many people put constraints or rules or human guidelines on having faith. When men get in the way, “the church” becomes something of an unintended by product. If we all love like Jesus- the truth would be to love and help everyone. I applaud your vulnerability to look at your heart and mind in a space that therapy provides so you can clear the clutter and find your footing. I will be visiting Paris in two weeks- if I see you and Cooper out and about- I’ll give you a wave!
Jay, your on the path to self enlightenment. You have evolved because of the questions you have asked. When others feel passed by, they will lash out.
True that 🥂
1. Excellent work- asking questions and working through stuff after being brought up in the church is not easy. It's something I've struggled through as well. 2. Be cautious about Better Help- they're being investigated by the FTC here in the States for divulging private patient information for marketing purposes (HUGE YIKES!). There are other issues with the way they treat therapists, too. That's not to say there aren't good/ethical therapists working for them (and easy access to therapists is a great thing), but the parent company deserves a second look.
Thanks for the heads up! We had a discussion about this with them last year and it seemed like things had been appropriately settled. To my knowledge the complaint is over four years old and the settlement went through last year - they were held to account for something that was common practice at the time and were made to be the example. When we talked with them (because this got raised when they first sponsored my channel) they assuaged our concerns. I'll keep an eye on it for sure though - it's definitely important to me to only work with companies that stick to high standards.
Great Vlog today! I prefer less “meta” on my UA-cam viewing but today’s was informative and reflective. Also I love the length of the vlog a days reboot - perfect for me ( it’s me not you when it comes to the “meta” avoidance ).
Thanks Mike! And I feel that. I think there's a lot of value in the conversation that happens within the platform and here in the comments - I want to find a beneficial and non-cringe way of encouraging it without succumbing to "all I do is fight with the comments"
"Beware of any system which discourages questioning. Anyone who stifles questions is afraid that it could uncover the falseness of the beliefs." ~ Rabbi Noach Weinberg
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This was just extremely well done. I would think Better Help can recognize that. The whole first part was dredging up soooooo much in me. Dear gaaawd the gaslighting and the way that our childhoods were so infused with it that it became our own inner voice and THEN the facing of one's own demons and climbing hand hold by hand hold from the depths . . the finally daring to share aaaaand then a comment like that. I will tell you the truth. I could not have made this video. **takes note** (oh look, some rage to investigate.. . or perhaps simply to accept as valid and be a perent to ) At any rate, I am slow clapping here because to swivel back to the start. . . SO. WELL. DONE. (slow clap -----> standing ovation)
I'll take a solid slow clap 👏
I’m a new subscriber, but knowing you’re a PK has given me more insight into who you are. Thanks for sharing.
There's so much more insight to come, I'm afraid 😆
Thank you for another valuable Jay-share. Truly valuable throughout many levels!
Thanks for watching!
Je viens d'écouter vos commentaires sur votre parcours de foi. J'ai écouté votre message l'année dernière. J'ai également pris le temps de lire de nombreux commentaires gentils et réfléchis. Je comprends que beaucoup ne veut pas dire tout. J'ai retrouvé mon commentaire original et je le maintiens. « J'espère que mes enfants auront le courage de me parler comme vous le faites avec votre père. »
Ça reste très gentil, merci 🙏
6:36 Freeze frame to brighten your day
Wow, bravo for addressing the topic, and bravo for allowing the comments to follow. 👏 I can only imagine the Pandora’s box of comments you’ve been through. I consider myself Christian, but I left my church almost a decade ago, and I’ve been thru a ton of therapy. One “semantic stop sign” I keep getting, is that I just need to forgive and move on. I.E. - when I do, I’ll finally stop questioning, because all pastors are human and make mistakes. 🤦🏻♀️
Ah yeah, the appeal to forgive. Noble sounding, but usually dismissive of the harm done without any intent to understand or undo it. I know that one all to well. I hope you're in a better place for all the work you've done 🥂
Loved this discussion.
Thanks!
Magilla: I believe this is in reference to phrase “the whole Megillah”. Comes from Yiddish. I’m not Jewish, but I believe once a year there is a service where something called the Megillah is read during a service. It’s very long. So to say “the whole Megillah” means “the whole thing” or “completely” or “thoroughly”. It’s a common expression among American Jewish community. “I was a my cousin’s house and he was explaining the whole Megillah about the upcoming wedding details.” The cousin explain everything about the wedding.
Gotta love a good cousin who's up to date on the references
The previous 2 videos have been so relevent to what I needed to hear , but I also watcg cause I love seeing paris I miss her and will always have her in my ❤
I'm happy that they've been what you needed!
🙋🏻♀️”Exvangelical” here. I love this video a lot - love Murakami, too. Thank you for openly sharing. It helped me and I’m sure it helps others, too. With appreciation! 🙏🏼✨
My pleasure - thanks for watching and sticking with me 🥂
Very thoughtful response
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1/ Paris at night looks amazing. 2/ if you were to buy a property in Paris would that get you some kind of visa, or help you obtain citizenship. all the best
It wouldn't hurt 😆 But hopefully my application is solid as is
Your channel is not religion and politics? Then explain how Cooper is an icon who rules all our hearts 😂
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Therapy is also quite expensive in a cost of living crisis and you're struggling to pay your bills. I agree that it's needed, but it's not a priority when it costs so much
Accessibility is definitely an issue. I'm grateful it's less expensive here.
I'm a bit late to this video, but I find it so interesting that the men of faith in your life were very "reason-focused" and thought their emotions couldn't be trusted; I'm a person of faith myself (though not Christianity), and at times when I find my faith wavering I turn to my emotions and how my faith makes me feel, rather than turning to reason to keep my faith going. Because, well, isn't that what faith is? I just found that really interesting!
Definitely different worlds on that front
Great topic! I grew up not in the church, but drawn to those connected. Whether it be a boyfriend who was a PK, or a best girlfriend whose father and brother were both pastors. I have always felt on the fence but, with time, found myself grounded in being more spiritual. I explained to a boyfriend one time that we are just basically just love blobs. A part of a bigger love blob. All religions lead back to love. It’s not complicated. Wrap your head around that.
I'm so glad that, as a devoted atheist, I don't have to deal with all of this baggage. You don't have to find your place in some massive thought system; just be a good person.
5:12 To the people who say you think too much: Sir we can’t all be “No thoughts, only vibes”.
I've always been a questioner and despite just wanting answers and understanding it's often viewed as disagreement with the topic or procedure. I think some see a question and they go into defense mode instead of trying to understand where the questioner is coming from. Or they feel their beliefs or decisions are being attacked. I saw it in the corporate world all of the time. I see it when people ask if Paris is safe or if a particular area is safe to stay in. So many just say Paris is safe, no concerns, etc. But then a more thoughtful someone will give you specific tips on how to stay safe and areas that may be a little sketchy late at night or if you're alone. I live in a small town in Wisconsin, grew up in the suburbs of Chicago and rarely went into downtown Chicago and never at night by myself. I've visited big cities with friends, group or spouse but not on my own. Can count on one hand how much public transport I've used. Never been further than Canada or Mexico. Is it surprising that on my first trip alone to Paris I'd have questions or concerns? The Metro is easy? Easy if you've lived in London or New York and used it frequently. I did use it when I was in Paris and it was pretty easy but watching videos is not the same as actually doing it. I was fortunate to have a guide my first day to walk me through it. If we stop questioning are we really living?
Relatable!
🥂
Hi Jay, I had no idea this was your background. I had suggested it would be an interesting vid on other churches in Paris other then Notre Dome 😳. Thanks for being so frank. Religion is an enigma. Self preservation is self care❤
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This is helpful! I still think that jacket looks good on you.
Thanks!
You handled this topic and comment well. And I believe we SHOULD be pursuing things worth critiquing. Lastly, therapy is something that we ALL need and not a "last resort" as our current culture (especially amongst men) believes it to be. I heard it said once that therapy is like car maintenance. If you are fixing the car once it has broken down it is too late. In needs maintenance as prevention along the way.
Great analogy
Jay, you’re also a PK and a Francophile?? This is wild… been following you for a few years and we both spent time in Springfield for work and now I learn this lol Are you my spirit twin!?
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I agree wholeheartedly. Been there….conservative, Presbyterian intellectualism. No discussion of feelings. Talk decades to come to terms with leaving the church. Therapy helped, my parents’ hypocrisy put the nail in the coffin.
One of your best videos IMO. So honest. It amazes me how people who want "proof" of most things are completely willing to have "faith" in their religious belief, for which there is absolutely no proof. And yet, they will fight to the death for that faith. I'm currently reading the work of Mauro Biglino, who was a translator of original Hebrew texts for the Vatican. Those literal translations reveal an entirely different meaning to the bible. Fascinating!
We often forget how many layers there are between us and the originators of the text
being open minded or questioning stuff… being human
Curiosity keeps us fun
Hi Jay, thank you for sharing… a lot to think about…
Thanks for watching 🙏
Have you heard back on attaining your French citizenship? Just wondering because your vlog message today is so French in its searching. Keep doing what you're doing.
Long wait ahead, but I'll let you know for sure 🥂
01:38 ouff - yuck!! I second Prof. Feynman's sentiments
1 of my kids (25 yrs) went to therapy. First I was bothered as why did he not talk to dad? But then I was happy that he was man enough to work his self with others . It was a good thing. Seems it was good for you. It makes me happy to see your dad visit Paris.
Another question. I am working on a (writing) book that includes AI in the future. Do you think an Ai therapist would work 🤔. 🌴🌴Aloha
"To Err is Human - To Forgive is Divine" - keep going Jay one day you will arrive there
The title is me to myself after realising that ingesting a fruit seed doesn’t result in a plant growing in me.
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I always wondered about that as a kid too
We have been in Paris for two days. Having Breakfast in America tonight.
🍳
My personal gods are plural and omnipresent everywhere in the Universe they created. Earthlings are only beginning to understand them.
🥂
I wish I had your ability to talk to a camera in public lol. Like I saw you notice the guy coming up behind you on the street and I was thinking, “oh, he’s going to cut here.” But then you kept talking lol. It had my social anxiety peaking lol. (Not to take away from your videos message, which I appreciate as a man who came from a extremely religious family)
Two sides of the same anxiety coin. I feel you 😆
Two words:
"Faith based"
How do you film your videos? Is a smartphone with a magnetic mount or stand? Always wondering how it has not been stolen yet 😅
He does have a magnetic add on for the phone that he showed a little while back. I'm also constantly amazed that no one has taken his phone yet and I've been watching since 2017 The getting onto the metro shots legit give me low key anxiety every time. lol He does have a really cool video from some years back if you search his stuff where he shows exactly how he filmed all day long in one of his vlog a days.
@@kaleidoscopeallie oh perfect, thanks a lot!
Exactly, I'm going to do a video on how I film at some point, but in the mean time you can find my gear list at www.jayswanson.me/gear !
1:19 Lol I would never engage with this. Feels kooky to me.
Wow, what a nasty comment. I am very sorry that type of mud was thrown at you. Thank you for your honesty.
This is absolutely none of my business, but since you have mentioned it on a number of occasions, I have to tell you that I am extremely curious as to your childhood. You seem to have a nice relationship with your dad now, which is nice, but I’m guessing you have had a pretty complicated relationship with him over the years. Now, whether or not you get into it on UA-cam is entirely your choice. As I said, ain’t none of my business! But I’m happy that you’re working through this via therapy. Therapy is rad. Cheers!
how much I want to share changes on any given day, and thanks for the support =) Therapy IS rad
😘😘😘
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Not much worse in the world than organized religion… sadly. I’m also an ex- church goer.
Sad it let us down, but happy we could manage what came after
When will you ever find a new place and expand
workin' on it
With the decline in people showing religious affiliation in multiple countries, I just want to say to the "I'll pray for you" / "bless your heart" crowd:
You could have been nice at any time. You could have actually acted like Jesus at any time. You could have been decent people at any time.
But you didn't. Repeatedly. In the worst way. Not just bordering on using your worldview to justify abuse to others, but actually using your worldview to justify abuse to others.
It has been noticed. And if history, and recent events around the world, have taught us anything? It's that people that were abused can turn into abusers in their own right. A continual history of groups of people that will tell you that what they're doing aren't actions, but reactions.
Like I said: there are groups that can be nice at any time. Until time moves on, until the time runs out, and reactions counter the actions. It's up to people and groups throwing their weight around to make the inevitable reactions in the future ones they want to see in the world.
Comments like the one to Jay? Not making a good future case, it has to be said.
Therapy is doing a lot of homework. And we know how people feel about that 👀
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In a way you are doing what you are complaining about. The comment you showed, I generally agree with the commenter. Maybe not as firm on the therapy, as I can’t know what was discussed and I doubt the commenter knows either, but that was someone countering your comment by speaking up for God’s Truth. And you dismissed that with a comment along the lines of he doesn’t want to deal with his doubts on the subject. Many people witness to those who challenge God’s Truth and do it out of having doubts but out of concern for someone turning their back on the Lord.
I can’t know why you took the path you did. Was it therapy? Was it leaning more on feelings - which, yes, can easily lead one astray not just on faith matters but many things? People who watch a UA-cam video can’t know, but hearing someone express such sentiments is disappointing and they may be concerned about that person. Even though UA-cam may not be truly real life in many cases, people on screen are far more real in most cases than actors in a movie or TV show. That may lead to a comment and it doesn’t mean a commenter is struggling.
I do hope and pray that you find your way back to God’s path. If there are influences that have pulled you away- not saying there are - I hope and pray their influence over you will lessen. And if it’s just doubts and questions, I hope in someone God will speak to you and bring wisdom to you to address those.
As a very left brained person with science and engineering training I always struggled not so much with faith but more about “we just can’t prove it” which is hard for a person like me. I have started reading a lot of apologetics materials including a book now that goes into areas of philosophy and historiography that is complete foreign to me. It blows my mind simply as subject areas, but the application of these to logical reason and examination of the faith has been a great blessing to my left brain. The logical arguments based in reason have been very encouraging. Not saying that that is where you are and that it would have the same impact, just saying that I pray that God will bring the wisdom to you that is specific to whatever you need and if there influences blocking that I hope you can distance form those to receive that wisdom.
Now, here’s hoping the next video is less heavy! 😂
To be honest having a hard time and struggle are valid feelings. Because even Jesus has anger, cry, love and have friend, like a normal person I recommend to watch The Chosen and if you think because you follow Jesus everything is going to be ok, let me tell is not true. the Bible says "Everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted." Timothy 5:10 is not easy remember "But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." Matthew 7:14 Take care.
You see this tactic in several forms everytime someone goes on a political show and doesn't agree with the narratives the host is pushing, while pretending to be engaging in real analysis.
There are a lot of these tactics, and unfortunately most of us are I'll equipped to handle them
Oooh, 666 likes. I'd better make that 667.
God is or is not in the heart and/or mind's eye of the beholder...
I hate, hate, hate the "I don't have religion; I have a relationship with Jesus" line. Dude -- in that case, you have a religion! That you really, really believe your religion is correct means little -- it's still a religion!
I disagree with your definition of religion. That would be called faith. Religion and faith are not the same and you can have faith in God or Jesus and not be part of a religion.
@@DeepFrz97Imagine being the exact person this comment was directed to and still missing the point ...
Prayer is the best therapy but for those who don’t have that relationship with God yet therapy talk therapy ( someone hearing you out and you figuring it out as you rationalize ) is helpful most times . Now medication is not the same. Medication will destroy most and enslave them . Get sunshine , don’t isolate and eat fresh organic food avoid alcohol and smoking . And seek God! E happy and grateful . Remember this is not heaven and therefore will be challenging but with Gods help and your effort you will endure until the end . Little moments ❤value those bc they add up 😊
Hey man you've been copying Casey Neistat's style for like seven years, and I think you've hurt your own UA-cam performance because you have the exact same setup that is clearly copying someone else. You're not Casey Neistat in Paris. Don't try to be.
I've been copying his style for closer to 9 years if you do your research ;P
As someone who grew up in a religious household that had a lot of these semantic stops signs (a term i just learned from you) this is an eye opener to how that language shows up in my life still today without me knowing it. This was video was like holding up a mirror and so helpful in understanding how I might be getting in my own way of connecting with people at a more meaningful level because I am placing these stops signs subconsciously! Thanks for the thought provoking content Jay!
I'm happy it could be of some help!
I'm sorry to keep harping on French literature, but if you look at Voltaire's "Dialogue du chapon et de la poularde," you can find the source of the classic quote, "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities." The problem is that the translation is twisted, partially because the context doesn't jibe with our times. Some of that context is that in Voltaire's time, there were literally people who "were entitled to make you absurd" to dictate what you had to believe, despite the fact that your mind and heart were telling you something different. His definition of "absurd" resonates with the concept of cognitive dissonance as we have it today. Your description of leaving the church, brought this to mind.
Your French is much better than mine, but, adjusting for some of the differences between Voltaire's world and ours, I think "Those who are entitled to make you absurd, can also make you unjust," would be closer to what he was saying.
It's a fantastic quote and though I'm unfamiliar with the source, I like your adjusted version too
Thanks for being so nice to my boyfriend :) keep on keeping on : )
I believe everyone has to find their own path, if you are religious or not. Personally I'm an agnostic atheist that was raised in the church in the South. It can be hard to even find people to talk to in an honest way and reveal all the questions one has. Most people I know that are religious still don't feel that all their questions are answered to their satisfaction. From my world view it's impossible, and that's ok. At the end of the day we all have to come to our own conclusions. Kudos to you, Jay for having the courage to face your fears and questions with honesty and introspection. Your vlogs just keep getting better and I'm glad I found your channel (about 5 years ago) so I can in some way take the journey with you.
You would make a great father. ask Cooper ❤
I came to your channel to prep for a trip to France last year. Videos like this is why I still watch, despite my trip being over 😢. As a female living in the US I see semantic stop-signing around the biggest issue facing females in the US: abortion. “Abortion is murder” is the pithy comment that comes up over and over and the speaker/writer has no ability to engage in or try to understand the complexity of the issue at all. It’s the complete shut down of critical thinking and open mindedness. Keep up the good work!
This can also be said for those who just write "my body my choice" and dismisses or shuts down anyone who would try to say otherwise. Its a very sensitive topic, for sure, but I find it disappointing that more than not, a discussion cant be civil. Also...the comment section can be rough! Sometimes I wonder if i should bother saying anything, but here i am, lol.
Seems like you both kept the comments honest and kind, which is all we can really ask for 😆 Thanks for watching and commenting 🥂
OMG! Thank you. In so little time in this video you have articulated what I have, at times, spent hours trying to explain to other people. I am a by product of years of therapy & different forms of self reflection. I have to caution that not all therapeutic relationships are healthy. This is usually because not all therapists are healthy. That being said I cannot speak highly enough of what is possible in a really good therapeutic relationship. For the past several years I have been doing a lot of Jungian work & I find that it is very impactful in learning who I am, who I have been & who I want to be.
I'm really glad you're finding good healing in it. And you're totally right, we're all human (even therapists) and it's important to realize the real work is done by the one seeking to change