best advice: don't talk to your family about your arguments. I am married for 14 years and never talked to my family or friends about our issues - best choice ever
Iqra Ahmed even less likely - except if you really are getting divorced or are buying a house or are having or not having kids, any potential thoughts we kept or keep to ourselves. You need to learn to make your partner your best friend, if you want this to be about each other. plenty of other things to talk about with others than your marriage.
This was such a great video - definitely should do a part 2!! Here's a few talking points for the next one: - how to be more open - dealing with overbearing in-laws - how to overcome conflict with families - what to do when your fundamental morals conflict (and you hadn't really noticed it before marriage) - overcoming insecurities - advice on when to have children and how to be prepared - is there anything else about the first night that people don't normally bring up - living together: general tips
Agreeee, except the conflicting morals part💀💀💀 i meannn how are people gonna get married before ever bringing up their fundamental morals🤔. Of course this isnt to say that kinda thing doesnt happen, I'm merely bamboozled by the fact that it does.
I know what you mean, I'm the kind of person who wants to know everything before I make it serious. But sometimes people don't even realise their own morals until they are put into a specific situation, you know what I mean?
One last question on good communication: How to have better conversation in a relationship? Meaning: How to convince each other without forcing one's own opinion on the other, and find an agreement?
Omg same , been procrastinating the whole day and i have my mid terms next week and the first one is physics AND i am 16 i am not planning on getting married right now lol HELP ME ....
The older I've gotten, the more I've realised there is no point in having a massive wedding and spending thousands with guests I don't even want to have there.
Safiyya SC it's just spending money recklessly feeding people who are probably chatting shit about your wedding about how they don't like it whilst they're there. Shits stupid but it's the truth
This is what I'm always telling people. Why invite the whole village to your wedding when they're only there to eat all your food and probably are lowkey hating on you the entire time? :D
Marriage is a fundamental component of Islam. What do you mean by "IF" I get married? Marrying and having children and raising a strong Muslim family should be the goal for us all :)
Teeta Malangi were in the Quran does it say that marriage and having children is Fard? And who are you to judge her?...some people have personal reasons as to why they may not want to get married or they may not be able to for physical or mental health reasons. It's her choice so please don't make her feel as though it's any one elses business what she does with her life..she's not doing anything wrong by not being sure if she wants to get married. Focus on your own life
I want a part 2 Dina, tell us how you dealt with your mother in law. Sid, address how you try to find a balance between Dina and your family? Also, address money. I think it's important to talk about financial stresses that you face together when merging together in a marriage
Keys to a good marriage: - Trusting eachother. - Communicating. - Respecting eachother. - Being eachothers best friend. - Not being to jaelous. - Being humble and nice towards eachother. - Respecting eachothers decisions. - Loving and caring for your family in law as you want for your own family. - Holding on to eachtother, not giving up easily. - Supporting eachother, - Don't tell any problem you have to anyone, except when it's like a huge, big, unacceptable thing. - Giving eachtother space. - Spending time together, making time for eachother. - Understanding eachothers diffrences. - Being real with eachother. - Helping eachother. etc.
In another video, Dina said she basically educated him hahaha i believe that she stuck it out till he matured lol I'm not blaming guys but a lot of the time there's things they just don't know. Vice versa too! Find the person and you can decide if you want to better yourselves together or not
Hold up. It bothers me that you so casually mentioned that there is a small amount of people you know who lost their virginities their wedding night because the guy forced it. And it was painful. And she was crying all night. That is marital rape. Can we please talk about this?
shootstars91 thats what I was thinking. Unfortunately its a reality for so many women, especially the generation of our mothers or for women of the current generation that get married to inconsiderate men. Makes me so sad to even think about it.
It happens and guess what ? Soo many familes think this is normal and the most important thing is the result. If you watch some "arabic"old movies it shows that the parents don't leave the apartment after the groom and bride arrive and the wait in front of the door ! Then the groom HAVE to show the entire world who is waiting outside a white cloth with blood on it.. Can you imagine if the girl dosn't want to ? PS: You don't have to bleed when you have sex unless it's soo harsh
I don't think so there is a difference between forcing her or her wanting to do it too even though it's painful because then you know after the pain is gone.
I was exactly the same. It took a lot for me to get comfortable enough with my fiancé (I’d say around 5/6 months) and thankfully he was really understanding and saw things from my perspective. It does take time and being with the right person does help immensely :)
Is it anxiety to do with marriage or anxiety in general? Because the latter can be fixed easily with a GP appointment and a referral in the right direction (usually a course on causes and how to overcome anxiety). I struggled with anxiety for years and alhamdulillah I personally am glad Allah cured it via the means I mentioned before I got married. Work on yourself before a good spouse comes along iA, you will find it much easier to deal with them if you don't have your own neuroses (idk if that's the right word?) to deal with.
Omg my experience was completely different, it was heaven like. Everyday I came to find out something very positive and beautiful about my husband. He is the kindest and most funniest guy I have ever seen .
So authentic.... Not like the fairytale unrealistic things shared all over the internet. I wish I'd watched something like this before my wedding... I wouldn't have freaked out so much when it didn't happen for us in the first few weeks.
RBerserk EU your "trusted " maulana needs to be educated then. You should question your sources. Contraception is halal in general. If it was haram then all muslims would have 10000 children.
I think it’s SO important that you guys outline such taboo topics! So much goes unsaid in our cultures and it really does lead to negativity but this is so helpful for newer generations and the guidance goes a very long way
I think it needs to be clarified that Dina isn’t casually speaking of marital rape. The sex is consented by both parties. The “force” she is speaking of isn’t that which translates to rape, it is “forcing” the “brick wall” she was speaking of. “Force” in this context is synonymous with “rushing” opposed to easing into it. This may be painful and a terrible experience, but not rape. Using terms like this so liberally undermines genuine cases of marital rape. Just to add, I found this video so relatable and couldn’t agree more with each of the tips given. I would most definitely enjoy a part 2 as I’m sure others would also. How did having a baby compare to the first year? What were some difficulties in your relationship that came about as a result of having a baby? Thank you. Loved this video.
Bella Oz great point, there is some detailed nuance that is being overlooked...I think there is frustration on the part of some women because no matter how hard they try to relax, there is too much anxiety. There are ways to be gentle but in reality it can take weeks for your first time to properly take place. I think this may not have been as common in the past, thus your Distinction is good.
One of the most important thing is guys not to give up easily. Marriage is based on trying and the beginnings no matter if you were together or even lived together, it's harder because the responsibility is bigger. So survive first moments and later it should be better. I wish every couple a lot of happiness and love :)
As a muslim women, I have always been taught not to talk about periods in front of any guy and even to hide the fact that you can't pray, was it the same for you? Also, when you got married how did Sid react when you got your period for the first time with him? Did you have to explain to him how it works or did he already know? I know some guys are oblivious to it before marriage and then their wife tells them.
That way of thinking is sad tbh. Every boy above the age of like 12 should understand and know about periods. I don't think its right to hide and keep it from siblings/dad etc because its natural and nothing to be ashamed about. This idea of hiding when you are on your period is maybe cultural but not from Islam. Ofcourse be clean and discreet, no need to have it in someones face but your husband (a man you will be sleeping in the same bed with, having sex with) is going to ofcourse know when you are on your period.
I'm a Muslim women and thank God my upbringing was nothing like yours... In fact whenever I don't have pads, I will literally call my dad to buy me some.. And most times my 2 brothers know when I'm not praying...
Mia CW before we can pray we have to perform gushul to purify ourselves. So basically clean ourselves. But this purity can be broken, one way it is broken is if you bleed. So when a girl is on her period she is technically "impure", because she is bleeding daily for about a week or so.
1st: Yall mad cute 2nd: Yes to a part 2 3rd here's the question: What if you move to your husband's country or vice versa and you live far from your family?
Bts_bornToSlay_myLifeuuh - Get ready for a lot of stress. 😂 It’ll take a bunch of compromise, patience, but regardless I’m sure one of the partners would feel homesick and it adds onto the stigma of moving to a completely new country and having to adapt to that culture. It’ll take a lot of work.
Im so worried about the last bit. Genuinely dont wanna leave my family. The only city id be willing to compromise on moving to is Birmingham (I live in ldn)
It's probably a wild thought but If I get married I'd love to live in another country with my husband, away from both of our families and to build a life for ourselves on our own pace.. but like I said it's a wild thought.
Thank you for being this honest! Yes please do a part 2!!!!! My question: How did you feel after giving birth? How did you feel confident with your body and were you not scared that Sid would not find you as attractive as he just do to because your body changed?
So you know how everyone is using 'relationship goals' to describe literally all couples who aren't stabbing each other in the throat? Yes? Well listen up folks; THESE two are mudda-frikki-frikki relationship goals!
This is actually such good advice on how to make it in a committed healthy relationship. Thanks so much for doing this and for being so honest. I would love to see follow up videos on how you two balance careers, parenting, making big decisions that affect the two of you, learning to deal with each other's families (if that won't get you in trouble with them!). I've been in married for 6 years and I still learned from this video
Part 2 please!! A question I have - hearing about the wedding night has made me really relieved but did you guys talk to each about that before the wedding or were you both just on the same page?? How can you approach that topic with your fiancé so you don't 'let them down' by saying you want to wait.
Just tell them I think, if they are pressuring you on the first nights of marriage even though you said you want to wait, alarm bells should be ringing in your mind. Your partners priority should be making you feel happy and comfortable so it'll come naturally.
I'm getting married next year and I had the TALK with my fiance and he actually was really happy with me for bringing it up because he didn't want to bring it up but he later expressed he did want to cover some points. Do it, it'll make you both feel calmer and closer.
The previous answers to your question are all very good. But I would say, if you still find it hard to talk to him about it, watch this video with him if you get alone time, otherwise, send him the link and tell him to watch it so that you two can have a talk about you guys thoughts and aspirations as a couple, your wedding, and your married life. Watching this might help brake the awkwardness if either one of you are a bit shy and like Shania wrote - he might also want to talk about things but not know how to approach you about it - so this might help him too!
I have a tip for everyone on what I wish I knew before getting married when I was younger even though it might be obvious to some. Be stable in the relationship. Meaning, finish school, know how to cook, clean, have a hobby or job to prevent SOME fighting... I remember only being concerned about the first night but honestly that was nothing compared to the stress having to deal with everyday life. I was really young and didn’t know how to do anything but clean (my mom would always take care of it). . So it put stress on us bc I wasn’t contributing as much in the relationship, along with insecurity bc of it.. I’ve learned a lot through the 6yrs. But I think this has to be 1 of the most important things to know.
Aah my husband and I just finished watching it and we can so relate to this! The first few months of our marriage were HORRIBLE even though we got married after dating each other for 10 years. I found him super messy and unorganised and he found me UBER controlling. Good learning experience in terms of finding the middle ground, and compromising. We are much happier 2 years on! Oh and about the wedding, I completely agree. We had a 1000 people, 5 day wedding, our parents wanted to throw it for us so we just let them. We would have been able to buy a house if they just gave us that money instead. Probably one thing I would change if I could go back too! Thanks for posting. Loved the video!
Maays hehe it was really stressful as my husband and I wanted a small and intimate wedding ceremony. Aww that's sweet. Thank you for the nice wishes! x
Loool I would be full of stress the entire time with that many people!! I still wonder how you guys afford it too! I really hope to have a small wedding no more than 100 people Inshallah I can't be bothered to please hundreds of people I don't care about
I've noticed Dina (and thus people commenting on Dina's videos) have this definition of dating where you get to know the person but don't do anything physical like touching, kissing or being alone with each other. It may not be a sin then. Khayr, Allah knows best
UK youtube umm everyone has their own religious evolution, and we weren't particularly religious during our teenage years. 😛 And yes, the definition of dating written above was pretty accurate for us. Not that it should matter to you? 😊
Could you please talk about the issues you had based on your different backgrounds and how you actually found the middle? Thanks for being the only Muslims who are honestly speaking about stuff we could never talk with our parents 😄
I wish you had added that "forcing" in anything in intimacy is called rape, just because it's within marriage it shouldn't be overlooked or sugar-coated, its RAPE and people need to hear that. It was a great vedio over all, much love Dina.
Amina that's true. thats just what my husband is. we r married for 1 yr and when am really angry with him but I still laugh with his actions. thats just how it is with me
Part 2 please. I wear a scarf full time, and I am not comfortable when I don't have it on. Dina, how did you manage to take off your scarf for the first time in front of Sid? And what was Sid's reaction? PS love your videos 💕
Oh! Is that something people have a problem with? That's interesting! I wear a scarf full-time and I throw it off once I'm home lol. I'd be perfectly happy to have my hijab off with my mahram (I already am, I already do :) ), so if I were to get married then the guy would just join my mahram squad 😂😂
Can you please do a video on how you guys plan to raise your daughter and future kids. Homeschool? Balance between Islamic studies and secular, how to keep them from the harms in this world, how to ensure they are healthy and happy etc
Part 2 please! Also my question is as a Virgin myself, I am told not all virgins bleed the first time. My friend told me her husband called her a "Liar" because she didn't bleed when she indeed was a virgin. Which also made him question wether she was lying or not. This confuses me and I'm scared maybe I won't either which will lead my future husband to think I'm lying to, when I am not. Am I thinking way to much in to this ? Jazzkallah.
if the guy doesn't believe you he's straight up uneducated. not every woman bleeds. Some lose it in sports, some dont even have a freaking hymen. Like it's not a definite sign. You shouldnt worry about that, he's just gonna have to trust you just like you'd have to trust him (if he tells you he's a virgin too). All you have to worry about is your honesty, you cant really control what he believes. So may God grant you a good husband that isnt uneducated and trusts you
you can actually just google that. it's a fact that not everyone bleeds. also some people might get their hymen breaken/torn? before having sex, ex. in sport activities etc. so i guess the guy you marry just needs to be able to google and have some freaking trust
I didnt liked a big wedding and on these days people Gossip, wish you Bad luck!! Evil Eye!! Hell No travel First class Emirates with your Spouse and go Luxury!!. A simple Nikah is enough
This video was so interesting. I’ve currently been married for 4 months today. I totally get the weekend fighting but so far there’s never been any massive or really hurtful fights bar one. A couple of tips I would love to add is girls, get your birth control sorted well in advance e.g. 4/5 months. It will give you enough time to try different pills/methods. The first pill I went on made me depressed but because I had plenty of time to change and get used to a different pill before the wedding. I also got my Nikkah done a few month before the “wedding” which took so much of the stress off the wedding and the ‘first night’ because we were able to get used to each other in the run up before the wedding without it being haram. Good luck to everyone in their marriages!
Loved this video, thank you so much for sharing. My question for a part two is: what was the biggest sacrifice/compromise you both made towards one another that has changed you as a person but benefited the dynamics of your relationship entirely? May Allah continue to bless your marriage and that you always remain best of friends as well as husband and wife. Ameen.
Oh yes! Been waiting for this video 😇😇 but if you guys do a part 2 can you guys talk about birth control and the importance of it. Because I know soooo many women that get married and have a baby before their 1st year of anniversary and another baby before their 2nd year of anniversary because their husbands want that but they don’t look or care about what’s happening to their wives and how difficult it’s for them
If you didn't once feel like throttling your husband and simultaneously cursing yourself for marrying him during the first year of marriage ARE YOU EVEN NORMAL???!!! It gets better mates, Infact it gets great :) so all those out there who are scared, please don't be!! Just choose your spouse wisely, always consider the opinion of close ones and always always make sure you take your parents duaas and blessings.
As a Christian I thought this was so great to watch!!! although there are some aspects of your story that are not so relatable to me personally (hijab etc), most of what you said is so relatable and I agree %100 with. You both are so cute and I love your relationship dynamic. New subscriber!
Though I m a christian but enjoy watching your videos. We share common values based on religions we practise (like modesty). One comment : I will be honest I don't like you swearing but that's your choice.
Sooo cool that u finally uploaded this video! I got married very young and my husband and I had like the same experience as u guys haha The whole video I was talking to myself and saying: “ omg yesssss exactly “ lol 😂 Love from Germany
Yes definetly a PART II for sure...!!! Please talk more about how Sid is completely happy about Dina's success and how he was a backbone in your success. I would love to hear Sid talking about women empowerment (his contribution to Dina)bcz his point of view about that is always so open and modern. Financial struggles during first year of marraige. Were you guys burdened with family responsibilities(from either side) during your first year of marraige? Do you guys still have possessiveness or needy feeling in your relationship? Can't wait for pat 2.. ✌✌✌✌✌👌👌👌
Love when they talk about things like this. No one talks about it and quite honestly for me I am absolutely horrified for if I ever do get married. I mean I just feel like I would never find the right person. So it’s nice to hear how to deal with these things on a personal and realistic level
remove any trace of makeup right before you sleep, put your hair in a braid, brush teeth well, wear a good cream and lip balm. in the morning, wake up before him so you can freshen up OR just hope your nightly preparations did a good job and keep some mint pastils on your night stand to catch the first morning breath.
My questions for a part 2 would be: how do you keep the relationship upbeat & non-dull after being married for a while and how to be fair together - as in, how did you both decide who was doing what chores etc to balance it out so one person isn't doing everything by themselves? or how do you settle an disagreement when it comes to parenting making sure you're both on the same page when it comes to the way you raise Hana :)
sid and dina: don’t do a big wedding with 150 guests turkish people: L M A O HOW CUTE guys turkish people usually invite up to 600-700 people or even more lol. a small wedding is considered about 300-400 people in our culture .. oups lol my parents had around 1,300 people. half of them were family members of both my mom’s and dad‘s side adfhshsjs
Rabia - i know right! you have to invite everyone, even the old annoying aunt down the street because otherwise she’d get offended! i know for sure i won’t invite more than 300 people. wish you all the best for your wedding! ✨
I don't know if you've mentioned it before, but how did you guys meet? I feel like "Muslim culture" in general just forbids any type of interaction with the opposite gender so I kind of shut anyone out but then at the same time I want to get married some day, I'm like stuck in-between, so how do you get yourself out there? You're not supposed to date but you're supposed to marry? how does that work? And how do you know if the person is "the one" ?
On our wedding night, my husband and I counted our money and went to sleep.
Lmao
😂😭😭😭
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I literally spit out my food and released snot when I saw this comment. lmao
Best comment ever 😂😂
best advice: don't talk to your family about your arguments. I am married for 14 years and never talked to my family or friends about our issues - best choice ever
Lara A how about big things?
Touché never talk abt it!!
Yes I totally agree. It only makes it worse when you air your dirty laundry.
Lara A that is hilarious masha Allah I will do that insha Allah when I get married
Iqra Ahmed even less likely - except if you really are getting divorced or are buying a house or are having or not having kids, any potential thoughts we kept or keep to ourselves. You need to learn to make your partner your best friend, if you want this to be about each other. plenty of other things to talk about with others than your marriage.
This was such a great video - definitely should do a part 2!!
Here's a few talking points for the next one:
- how to be more open
- dealing with overbearing in-laws
- how to overcome conflict with families
- what to do when your fundamental morals conflict (and you hadn't really noticed it before marriage)
- overcoming insecurities
- advice on when to have children and how to be prepared
- is there anything else about the first night that people don't normally bring up
- living together: general tips
Agreeee, except the conflicting morals part💀💀💀 i meannn how are people gonna get married before ever bringing up their fundamental morals🤔. Of course this isnt to say that kinda thing doesnt happen, I'm merely bamboozled by the fact that it does.
I know what you mean, I'm the kind of person who wants to know everything before I make it serious. But sometimes people don't even realise their own morals until they are put into a specific situation, you know what I mean?
YES TO ALL OF THESE TOPICS! SID/DINA PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO A PART TWO!!!!!!!!! As you can see, we will definitely watch it 🙂🙏🙂
One last question on good communication: How to have better conversation in a relationship? Meaning: How to convince each other without forcing one's own opinion on the other, and find an agreement?
I have exams in 2days (collage) , what am I doing ... I'm not even married bruh....
Kainat E this is literally me
Omg same , been procrastinating the whole day and i have my mid terms next week and the first one is physics AND i am 16 i am not planning on getting married right now lol HELP ME ....
lol literally same
Kainat E same and i have 2 exams tomorrow...
MEEEE
The older I've gotten, the more I've realised there is no point in having a massive wedding and spending thousands with guests I don't even want to have there.
Safiyya SC it's just spending money recklessly feeding people who are probably chatting shit about your wedding about how they don't like it whilst they're there. Shits stupid but it's the truth
This is what I'm always telling people. Why invite the whole village to your wedding when they're only there to eat all your food and probably are lowkey hating on you the entire time? :D
Omg truuuuuuuuuuuuu
So 👏 flipping 👏 true 👏
Well said 💯💯💯
Spend it on the honeymoon and towards a house.
Praying together on the first night sounds SOOO much more romantic than anything touchy touchy.
The honesty and realness in this video is just everything😍😍😍😍 thankyou for that always, its soooo appreciated 🙌🏽
agreeed!
The moment he said 'we prayed together' i seriously got tears in my eyes #goals
I liked when sid said " if dina doesn't know something, nobody knows it " 😍 😍
This has turned out to be more helpful than I thought it’d be 😂. IF i get married, I’m gonna watch this again with my husband. Thanks guys!
naijahijabi are you somali
Marriage is a fundamental component of Islam. What do you mean by "IF" I get married? Marrying and having children and raising a strong Muslim family should be the goal for us all :)
Teeta Malangi were in the Quran does it say that marriage and having children is Fard? And who are you to judge her?...some people have personal reasons as to why they may not want to get married or they may not be able to for physical or mental health reasons. It's her choice so please don't make her feel as though it's any one elses business what she does with her life..she's not doing anything wrong by not being sure if she wants to get married. Focus on your own life
Teeta Malangi she might just mean if it’s in her fate/ if Allah (SWT) has written it for her.
But I thought getting married is completing half of your deen?
I’ll never lose my virginity cuz i never lose
Greedo i’m never losing my virginity ever again
LOOOOOOOOOOOL I CRACKED UP!
😂
s i 😂
Greedo OMGGGG 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Virgin at 27, Sid actually makes me not lose faith in muslim men.
it is more hard if you are good looking
For real muslim men are such hypocrites sometimes
:/
My father married at 38 and my Mother at 29, because of war in Irak...
Abraham Hashimi sid is, and he made it
I thought Sid was so mean at the beginning but now he’s literally been the reason I watch this channel
SBelle84 exactly my thoughts
SBelle84 why’d you think that ?
Ke'yani Chapman he was mean and a jerk. I couldn’t stand him. But he’s very different now and he is the reason I watch.
Same here. I used to think that he is an ass. Now he's different lmao
SBelle84 sammme I was like Dina was way out his league but MashaAllah they are too cute together
I want a part 2
Dina, tell us how you dealt with your mother in law. Sid, address how you try to find a balance between Dina and your family?
Also, address money. I think it's important to talk about financial stresses that you face together when merging together in a marriage
Shiza Rizvi !
yesssss I want that too
💼🔥🎉🎉
+++1
Sid: 300 people came
Dina: it was 150
Sid: it seemed like a fucking 1000 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
nau thank you! 💕💕
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂Looooool
This is legit the most I've ever learned about love and relationships in 29 years of life. Thanks for sharing.
Praying together 😭 how beautiful!
I knowww I wanna do that!!
Oh my fucking god! This video is finally made! Ive been commenting for this video for years!
Nour Mo control your hormones
Rita Akther i can cuss whenever i like so fuck you and all the people that liked your comment :) putossss
Nour Mo I thought I told you to control your hormones?
Mo show me your internet history bruh then we can talk about my hormones
Maria Hasan I can cuss whenever I like " oh my fucking God" there your world is over
Keys to a good marriage:
- Trusting eachother.
- Communicating.
- Respecting eachother.
- Being eachothers best friend.
- Not being to jaelous.
- Being humble and nice towards eachother.
- Respecting eachothers decisions.
- Loving and caring for your family in law as you want for your own family.
- Holding on to eachtother, not giving up easily.
- Supporting eachother,
- Don't tell any problem you have to anyone, except when it's like a huge, big, unacceptable thing.
- Giving eachtother space.
- Spending time together, making time for eachother.
- Understanding eachothers diffrences.
- Being real with eachother.
- Helping eachother.
etc.
AF Thank you, these are good points and hopefully I will put them to use.
So many things 😫 marriage seems so hard, but these key points are also for bf/gf relationships as well. Very hard, but very worth it! 🌟
AF ok that's a lot
Dina u got a really good husband mashAllah. And it's sad to actually say that because all guys should think how he does. X
Not all guys are bad you know
Mas A what lol I no they aren't!!!
Mas A of course but judging from past experiences it's sooo hard to find good ones
Alhamdulillah not all men think like him or we would be lost.
In another video, Dina said she basically educated him hahaha i believe that she stuck it out till he matured lol I'm not blaming guys but a lot of the time there's things they just don't know. Vice versa too! Find the person and you can decide if you want to better yourselves together or not
Hold up. It bothers me that you so casually mentioned that there is a small amount of people you know who lost their virginities their wedding night because the guy forced it. And it was painful. And she was crying all night. That is marital rape. Can we please talk about this?
shootstars91 thats what I was thinking. Unfortunately its a reality for so many women, especially the generation of our mothers or for women of the current generation that get married to inconsiderate men. Makes me so sad to even think about it.
shootstars91 that's messed up.
It happens and guess what ?
Soo many familes think this is normal and the most important thing is the result.
If you watch some "arabic"old movies it shows that the parents don't leave the apartment after the groom and bride arrive and the wait in front of the door !
Then the groom HAVE to show the entire world who is waiting outside a white cloth with blood on it..
Can you imagine if the girl dosn't want to ?
PS: You don't have to bleed when you have sex unless it's soo harsh
I don't think so there is a difference between forcing her or her wanting to do it too even though it's painful because then you know after the pain is gone.
Unfortunately, it is so common and considered normal in many cultures. The woman thinks this is how it is supposed to be.
Dina's scarf tutorial example is so right!! 😂😂😂
I’m so anxiety riddled and private as heck, I couldn’t imagine ever being this comfortable with another human being.
Ramla Mohamed same 😭
I was exactly the same. It took a lot for me to get comfortable enough with my fiancé (I’d say around 5/6 months) and thankfully he was really understanding and saw things from my perspective. It does take time and being with the right person does help immensely :)
Is it anxiety to do with marriage or anxiety in general? Because the latter can be fixed easily with a GP appointment and a referral in the right direction (usually a course on causes and how to overcome anxiety). I struggled with anxiety for years and alhamdulillah I personally am glad Allah cured it via the means I mentioned before I got married. Work on yourself before a good spouse comes along iA, you will find it much easier to deal with them if you don't have your own neuroses (idk if that's the right word?) to deal with.
Ramla Mohamed k
omg same im as socially awkward as you get
Omg my experience was completely different, it was heaven like. Everyday I came to find out something very positive and beautiful about my husband. He is the kindest and most funniest guy I have ever seen .
So authentic.... Not like the fairytale unrealistic things shared all over the internet. I wish I'd watched something like this before my wedding... I wouldn't have freaked out so much when it didn't happen for us in the first few weeks.
Who has been waiting for this video since their “Marriage story” two years ago?🙋🏻♀️ lol finally
Dina me
Dina can you please talk about birth control 💙
Manal Abukar condoms or anything preventing birth is considered haraam
I don't think its true that its haraam, where's your source?
Maays from a trusted Maulana/alim from my madressah who studied in daarul ulum in bury
RBerserk EU your "trusted " maulana needs to be educated then. You should question your sources. Contraception is halal in general. If it was haram then all muslims would have 10000 children.
Shh B that's a very bold statement to make just don't dig yourself into a hole with what you say... just saying for your benefit
This is the content I’m here for; funny, real and very honest. Not a lot of youtubers can relate
I think it’s SO important that you guys outline such taboo topics! So much goes unsaid in our cultures and it really does lead to negativity but this is so helpful for newer generations and the guidance goes a very long way
I think it needs to be clarified that Dina isn’t casually speaking of marital rape. The sex is consented by both parties. The “force” she is speaking of isn’t that which translates to rape, it is “forcing” the “brick wall” she was speaking of. “Force” in this context is synonymous with “rushing” opposed to easing into it. This may be painful and a terrible experience, but not rape. Using terms like this so liberally undermines genuine cases of marital rape. Just to add, I found this video so relatable and couldn’t agree more with each of the tips given. I would most definitely enjoy a part 2 as I’m sure others would also. How did having a baby compare to the first year? What were some difficulties in your relationship that came about as a result of having a baby? Thank you. Loved this video.
Bella Oz great point, there is some detailed nuance that is being overlooked...I think there is frustration on the part of some women because no matter how hard they try to relax, there is too much anxiety. There are ways to be gentle but in reality it can take weeks for your first time to properly take place. I think this may not have been as common in the past, thus your Distinction is good.
Hi u r absolutely right!!
I read your comment and honestly got so excited at your ease to explain such touchy feely subjects. I couldn’t have said it better
Dina, you are a very lucky lady. Sid is extremely mature and considerate.
We need a part 2!! I don't think you guys realize this but you are saving many marriages and not just in the Muslim community.We all thank you !
One of the most important thing is guys not to give up easily. Marriage is based on trying and the beginnings no matter if you were together or even lived together, it's harder because the responsibility is bigger. So survive first moments and later it should be better. I wish every couple a lot of happiness and love :)
Thank you that's really great advice!
Just imagine when Hana sees this when she’s older😂😂😭
Rabi Boo hella awkward lmao
Wish all the men out there were like sid
As a muslim women, I have always been taught not to talk about periods in front of any guy and even to hide the fact that you can't pray, was it the same for you? Also, when you got married how did Sid react when you got your period for the first time with him? Did you have to explain to him how it works or did he already know? I know some guys are oblivious to it before marriage and then their wife tells them.
Nawal Majid of course he knew how it works. every man knows how periods work.
That way of thinking is sad tbh. Every boy above the age of like 12 should understand and know about periods. I don't think its right to hide and keep it from siblings/dad etc because its natural and nothing to be ashamed about. This idea of hiding when you are on your period is maybe cultural but not from Islam. Ofcourse be clean and discreet, no need to have it in someones face but your husband (a man you will be sleeping in the same bed with, having sex with) is going to ofcourse know when you are on your period.
I'm a Muslim women and thank God my upbringing was nothing like yours... In fact whenever I don't have pads, I will literally call my dad to buy me some.. And most times my 2 brothers know when I'm not praying...
Why can you not pray?!
Mia CW before we can pray we have to perform gushul to purify ourselves. So basically clean ourselves. But this purity can be broken, one way it is broken is if you bleed. So when a girl is on her period she is technically "impure", because she is bleeding daily for about a week or so.
This is by far the best video the both of you have made together. Part 2 pls❤
1st: Yall mad cute
2nd: Yes to a part 2
3rd here's the question: What if you move to your husband's country or vice versa and you live far from your family?
Bts_bornToSlay_myLifeuuh - Get ready for a lot of stress. 😂 It’ll take a bunch of compromise, patience, but regardless I’m sure one of the partners would feel homesick and it adds onto the stigma of moving to a completely new country and having to adapt to that culture. It’ll take a lot of work.
They're both from the same country.
Im so worried about the last bit. Genuinely dont wanna leave my family. The only city id be willing to compromise on moving to is Birmingham (I live in ldn)
It's probably a wild thought but If I get married I'd love to live in another country with my husband, away from both of our families and to build a life for ourselves on our own pace.. but like I said it's a wild thought.
Hana is lucky to have you both as parents!
This video....greatness! The realness is irreplaceable and comforting. Please keep doing your thing! Much love from Philadelphia!
Thank you for being this honest! Yes please do a part 2!!!!! My question: How did you feel after giving birth? How did you feel confident with your body and were you not scared that Sid would not find you as attractive as he just do to because your body changed?
Imma just go ahead and upvote everoynes comments for Part 2 and questions
So you know how everyone is using 'relationship goals' to describe literally all couples who aren't stabbing each other in the throat? Yes? Well listen up folks; THESE two are mudda-frikki-frikki relationship goals!
Loved when they said the best part was when they prayed together , it is the thing that excites me most
This is actually such good advice on how to make it in a committed healthy relationship. Thanks so much for doing this and for being so honest. I would love to see follow up videos on how you two balance careers, parenting, making big decisions that affect the two of you, learning to deal with each other's families (if that won't get you in trouble with them!). I've been in married for 6 years and I still learned from this video
Part 2 please!! A question I have - hearing about the wedding night has made me really relieved but did you guys talk to each about that before the wedding or were you both just on the same page?? How can you approach that topic with your fiancé so you don't 'let them down' by saying you want to wait.
Just tell them I think, if they are pressuring you on the first nights of marriage even though you said you want to wait, alarm bells should be ringing in your mind. Your partners priority should be making you feel happy and comfortable so it'll come naturally.
Manta good Q
I'm getting married next year and I had the TALK with my fiance and he actually was really happy with me for bringing it up because he didn't want to bring it up but he later expressed he did want to cover some points. Do it, it'll make you both feel calmer and closer.
The previous answers to your question are all very good. But I would say, if you still find it hard to talk to him about it, watch this video with him if you get alone time, otherwise, send him the link and tell him to watch it so that you two can have a talk about you guys thoughts and aspirations as a couple, your wedding, and your married life. Watching this might help brake the awkwardness if either one of you are a bit shy and like Shania wrote - he might also want to talk about things but not know how to approach you about it - so this might help him too!
I have a tip for everyone on what I wish I knew before getting married when I was younger even though it might be obvious to some. Be stable in the relationship. Meaning, finish school, know how to cook, clean, have a hobby or job to prevent SOME fighting... I remember only being concerned about the first night but honestly that was nothing compared to the stress having to deal with everyday life. I was really young and didn’t know how to do anything but clean (my mom would always take care of it). . So it put stress on us bc I wasn’t contributing as much in the relationship, along with insecurity bc of it.. I’ve learned a lot through the 6yrs. But I think this has to be 1 of the most important things to know.
Aww thanks for sharing your advice !
Best advice ever
Aah my husband and I just finished watching it and we can so relate to this!
The first few months of our marriage were HORRIBLE even though we got married after dating each other for 10 years. I found him super messy and unorganised and he found me UBER controlling. Good learning experience in terms of finding the middle ground, and compromising. We are much happier 2 years on!
Oh and about the wedding, I completely agree. We had a 1000 people, 5 day wedding, our parents wanted to throw it for us so we just let them. We would have been able to buy a house if they just gave us that money instead. Probably one thing I would change if I could go back too!
Thanks for posting. Loved the video!
Woahhh 1000 guests and 5 days, are your parents millionaires lmao? Mashallah! Jokes aside may Allah continue to bless your marriage
Maays hehe it was really stressful as my husband and I wanted a small and intimate wedding ceremony.
Aww that's sweet. Thank you for the nice wishes! x
Loool I would be full of stress the entire time with that many people!! I still wonder how you guys afford it too! I really hope to have a small wedding no more than 100 people Inshallah I can't be bothered to please hundreds of people I don't care about
I've noticed Dina (and thus people commenting on Dina's videos) have this definition of dating where you get to know the person but don't do anything physical like touching, kissing or being alone with each other. It may not be a sin then. Khayr, Allah knows best
UK youtube umm everyone has their own religious evolution, and we weren't particularly religious during our teenage years. 😛 And yes, the definition of dating written above was pretty accurate for us. Not that it should matter to you? 😊
Aww really appreciate how honest sid&Dina always are ♥️
Could you please talk about the issues you had based on your different backgrounds and how you actually found the middle? Thanks for being the only Muslims who are honestly speaking about stuff we could never talk with our parents 😄
You guys are amazing, this video is going to help so many young people who are getting married etc 🙌🏻
Sid's rabbit impersonation .... was so unexpected. It killed me 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I wish you had added that "forcing" in anything in intimacy is called rape, just because it's within marriage it shouldn't be overlooked or sugar-coated, its RAPE and people need to hear that. It was a great vedio over all, much love Dina.
Another tip, marry someone who makes you laaaaugh! :) Your arguments will blow over faster and alot of stress will be taken off your marriage c:
Amina that's true. thats just what my husband is. we r married for 1 yr and when am really angry with him but I still laugh with his actions. thats just how it is with me
You could not have described marriage better. Perfect advices. May Allah keep your marriage and get each other in Jannah. MashaAllah. I want a part 2.
The way Sid described and acted how to not force it like a rabid dog 😂😂😂 but thank God for this video!
Part 2 please. I wear a scarf full time, and I am not comfortable when I don't have it on. Dina, how did you manage to take off your scarf for the first time in front of Sid? And what was Sid's reaction? PS love your videos 💕
Oh! Is that something people have a problem with? That's interesting! I wear a scarf full-time and I throw it off once I'm home lol. I'd be perfectly happy to have my hijab off with my mahram (I already am, I already do :) ), so if I were to get married then the guy would just join my mahram squad 😂😂
Naeema Khan just be comfortable and have self confidence
Can you please do a video on how you guys plan to raise your daughter and future kids. Homeschool? Balance between Islamic studies and secular, how to keep them from the harms in this world, how to ensure they are healthy and happy etc
I love how chatty Sid is in this video and how funny you guys were. Absolutely loved it!
It’s so totally obvious you two are best friends.❤️
Part 2 please! Also my question is as a Virgin myself, I am told not all virgins bleed the first time. My friend told me her husband called her a "Liar" because she didn't bleed when she indeed was a virgin. Which also made him question wether she was lying or not. This confuses me and I'm scared maybe I won't either which will lead my future husband to think I'm lying to, when I am not. Am I thinking way to much in to this ? Jazzkallah.
if the guy doesn't believe you he's straight up uneducated. not every woman bleeds. Some lose it in sports, some dont even have a freaking hymen. Like it's not a definite sign. You shouldnt worry about that, he's just gonna have to trust you just like you'd have to trust him (if he tells you he's a virgin too). All you have to worry about is your honesty, you cant really control what he believes. So may God grant you a good husband that isnt uneducated and trusts you
you can actually just google that. it's a fact that not everyone bleeds. also some people might get their hymen breaken/torn? before having sex, ex. in sport activities etc. so i guess the guy you marry just needs to be able to google and have some freaking trust
sarah michelle my sisters too. But they can tell because it’s super difficult for virgins and they don’t act like women with experience.
Tim Evans Thank you for the reply tim, I'm actually going to screen shot that for the future!
Silah thank you Silah! 😊
PART 2 🙏🏼
Yes for a part 2!!!
Saving money on wedding and traveling is my goal!!!
I didnt liked a big wedding and on these days people Gossip, wish you Bad luck!! Evil Eye!! Hell No travel First class Emirates with your Spouse and go Luxury!!. A simple Nikah is enough
YESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
Have a small wedding and the money you would have had on the wedding have on your travels
If he forces it its rape.
+Usama Fayyaz yeah it is u fucking pig!!
Usama Fayyaz it is
Usama Fayyaz forcing someone into having sex with you is literally the definition of rape, tf you r talking bout?!
Usama Fayyaz legally and ethically if you force anyone, married or not, it's rape. A good marriage shouldn't need to force it.
Genuinely hope your relationship is as awesome off screen as it is on screen. Mashaallah
FYI if a guy forces it. Without consent. It's rape. Married or not.
Honestly thank you for the video guys and for being so real about it. It will help a looooot of people for sure thank you so much!
This video was so interesting. I’ve currently been married for 4 months today. I totally get the weekend fighting but so far there’s never been any massive or really hurtful fights bar one. A couple of tips I would love to add is girls, get your birth control sorted well in advance e.g. 4/5 months. It will give you enough time to try different pills/methods. The first pill I went on made me depressed but because I had plenty of time to change and get used to a different pill before the wedding. I also got my Nikkah done a few month before the “wedding” which took so much of the stress off the wedding and the ‘first night’ because we were able to get used to each other in the run up before the wedding without it being haram. Good luck to everyone in their marriages!
Umarah Abid of
S K what's your problem?
S K ???
Loved this video, thank you so much for sharing. My question for a part two is: what was the biggest sacrifice/compromise you both made towards one another that has changed you as a person but benefited the dynamics of your relationship entirely? May Allah continue to bless your marriage and that you always remain best of friends as well as husband and wife. Ameen.
Now this is what I call relationship goals-- look how strong their bond is.
I just realize watching this video that marriage is not for me. #singleforlife
Ali Najma me too 😂
saaaaaaaaaaaaame lol
Ali Najma Coward 😂😂😂
Creator Over Creation sunnah* not farz
im literally so put off marriage after this lol i already was feeling weird about it now im defo remaining single
Omg a 30 min video?!? Blesssssss💙
im just coming across your channels and videos and I CANT HELP BUT COMMENT ON EVERYTHING, YOU GUYS ARE SUCH A PRECIOUS COUPLE& FAMILY
Y'all kept it real, Thanks for making this video.
Oh yes! Been waiting for this video 😇😇 but if you guys do a part 2 can you guys talk about birth control and the importance of it. Because I know soooo many women that get married and have a baby before their 1st year of anniversary and another baby before their 2nd year of anniversary because their husbands want that but they don’t look or care about what’s happening to their wives and how difficult it’s for them
It's finally here!!what we've been waiting for! jzkA x
the "not telling your families" is SO TRUE
If you didn't once feel like throttling your husband and simultaneously cursing yourself for marrying him during the first year of marriage ARE YOU EVEN NORMAL???!!! It gets better mates, Infact it gets great :) so all those out there who are scared, please don't be!! Just choose your spouse wisely, always consider the opinion of close ones and always always make sure you take your parents duaas and blessings.
What if it doesn’t?
As a Christian I thought this was so great to watch!!! although there are some aspects of your story that are not so relatable to me personally (hijab etc), most of what you said is so relatable and I agree %100 with. You both are so cute and I love your relationship dynamic. New subscriber!
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR AGES!!!! I'm so excited!!❤❤
"If Dina doesn't know it, NOBODY KNOWS IT. NOBODY." I find that so cute omg 😍
Though I m a christian but enjoy watching your videos. We share common values based on religions we practise (like modesty). One comment : I will be honest I don't like you swearing but that's your choice.
Natasha Boyer me too sister. I’m Muslim and I am surprised that no one else has commented about this. The swearing just isn’t good or cool.
They have mentioned that they try to do it less
THIS VIDEO IS EVERYTHING. LEGIT EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW. THANKS GUYS, YOU TWO ARE THE BEST!
You're absolutely right about the trust on a relationship. Thanks for you honestly!
Please please please do a part 2
Sooo cool that u finally uploaded this video! I got married very young and my husband and I had like the same experience as u guys haha
The whole video I was talking to myself and saying: “ omg yesssss exactly “ lol 😂
Love from Germany
Yes definetly a PART II for sure...!!! Please talk more about how Sid is completely happy about Dina's success and how he was a backbone in your success. I would love to hear Sid talking about women empowerment (his contribution to Dina)bcz his point of view about that is always so open and modern. Financial struggles during first year of marraige. Were you guys burdened with family responsibilities(from either side) during your first year of marraige? Do you guys still have possessiveness or needy feeling in your relationship? Can't wait for pat 2.. ✌✌✌✌✌👌👌👌
THIS WAS SO REAL AND OPEN THSNKYOU GUYS FOR MAKING THIS FOR THE SAKE OF EDUCATING ON A REAL BASIS it was real and rawe
Love when they talk about things like this. No one talks about it and quite honestly for me I am absolutely horrified for if I ever do get married. I mean I just feel like I would never find the right person. So it’s nice to hear how to deal with these things on a personal and realistic level
QUESTION: WAKING UP THE FOLLOWING MORNING LOOKING CRUSTY AND HAVING STINKING BREATH? TIPS?
Niska Mo you need no tips! Thats absolutely normal he will look as crusty if you if not even worse😂 it gets normal after the second night dont worry
remove any trace of makeup right before you sleep, put your hair in a braid, brush teeth well, wear a good cream and lip balm. in the morning, wake up before him so you can freshen up OR just hope your nightly preparations did a good job and keep some mint pastils on your night stand to catch the first morning breath.
My questions for a part 2 would be: how do you keep the relationship upbeat & non-dull after being married for a while
and how to be fair together - as in, how did you both decide who was doing what chores etc to balance it out so one person isn't doing everything by themselves? or how do you settle an disagreement when it comes to parenting making sure you're both on the same page when it comes to the way you raise Hana :)
sid and dina: don’t do a big wedding with 150 guests
turkish people: L M A O HOW CUTE
guys turkish people usually invite up to 600-700 people or even more lol. a small wedding is considered about 300-400 people in our culture .. oups lol
my parents had around 1,300 people. half of them were family members of both my mom’s and dad‘s side adfhshsjs
Rabia - i know right! you have to invite everyone, even the old annoying aunt down the street because otherwise she’d get offended! i know for sure i won’t invite more than 300 people. wish you all the best for your wedding! ✨
lool
Seulgi Kang OMMMG that's so truuue we invite so maaaany ppl
So true lmao
Seulgi Kang Saaame. Pakistani weddings are another level.
How did you both got so wiser in such a short time? I wish someone gave us these advice 23 years ago. Really enjoyed your show and wept inside
The honesty and realisticness is really very appreciated....nice one
The hijab breakfast man story is the best 😭😂😂😂
I don't know if you've mentioned it before, but how did you guys meet? I feel like "Muslim culture" in general just forbids any type of interaction with the opposite gender so I kind of shut anyone out but then at the same time I want to get married some day, I'm like stuck in-between, so how do you get yourself out there? You're not supposed to date but you're supposed to marry? how does that work? And how do you know if the person is "the one" ?
kenza b they met through uni
They have a video on it
Facebook
they did date
Supreme Videos most people would find this type of method creepy to say the least even amomg muslims these days
Bengali wedding. In Birmingham. My cousin's. Had over 1500 people smh. Look forward to part two!
TheBlooRayChannel dayum.
TheBlooRayChannel don’t even get me started with Bengali weddings bruv
TheBlooRayChannel loooòol us bengalis from Birmingham are off the scale
Omg, and I thought our 500 people weddings were extra 😂
Too many full stops ...............
You guys were so real, and you guys just gave us so much information thank you!
I salute you guys for talking about this and sharing your personal experience. Really enlightning💡