@@JustOutHereTrustingGod Exactly, it is totally different. I have coached many wives who wanted to grant their husbands "permission" to marry another wife. ~ Coach Fatimah 👑
Alhamdulillah! 💜السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته Nice little talk among you two.🧕👳♂️ Giving us the scoop on some things! "BE OUTSTANDING" جزاك الله خيرا
The wives relationship might be platonic but for me to even consider it id have to be platonically married to her too. Commiting, consulting, trusting supporting, planning, all things in a marriage would have to be apart of the wives relationship. Lol My platonic wife hahaha but really, without all that itd bring alot of problems. Having that kinda relationship with the other wife would help to avoid jealousy & insecurity. This other woman cares enough about me & my feelings to consult me, trust me, support me, commit to me (as a friend for life) , assuring me shes not trying to replace me...& i do the same...thats what i would need.
Permission is the wrong word, but consultation is really important. All parties need to agree in order to have a harmonious family. And we know for sure that Prophet did consult his wives on serious issues (not polygyny of course) and even listened to them and followed their advice (Umm Salama and the treaty of Hudaybiyyah) It doesn’t threaten manhood in anyway to act on advice from your wife.
I have non Muslim childhood friend who waited and froze eggs waiting for his “right time” to address his wife about her . She’s now in her 50s still waiting.
I like when she said(I’m paraphrasing) “We have a discussion about it but he doesn’t need to seek my permission”. I never understand when I hear that the man married secretly to avoid drama. Isn’t it drama to disrupt your household and not discuss the changes to come?
I like this channel, I also believe that each individuals freedom is vital, he is out of the country, and she wants to go to Chicago, even if he is in a different county he can’t help her either, no freedom no love, control. IMHO
Thank you and we're glad you like the channel. However, we disagree that he can't help her if he's out the country. A man, as a protector, and in today's time, a husband who knows where his wife(ves) are can make the necessary arrangements for protection. Example: a protector knowing hot spots in Chicago, can advise where not to go, have people on standby or as a security escort or local friends provide assistance. That's called respect and using what resources you have. 💪🏽✊🏽👑
Very good information. Although permission is not required, it is problematic to not offer the same respect that you would want if the shoe were on the other foot. The woman has a right to this discussion and to make a decision about how to proceed with her own life: whether to remain or exit. Also, although polygny may not (depending on circumstances) be physically harmful to some women, other women may find it excruciating, emotional pain and hurt can be just as devastating if not more so. It is the husband’s first responsibility to protect his wife in more ways than one.
It actually isn't problematic except in one's mind to act as though the shoe is on the other foot. When you mention that a wife has a 'right', where is this 'right' located in jurisprudence? It is what we consider a best practice for today's times, however, it's a man's right to decide how to move forward with marriage(s). Please provide the daleel for this right. Sadly, many hypothesize how excruciatingly painful polygyny can be but fail to find out why a form of marriage that has been a very common and normal part of the majority of human existence is now so challenging. Fact is, social engineering, feminism, and colonial thought has been adopted as the norm and these new beliefs have warped the thinking and mental state of many women. Naturally no one will be burdened with anything they cannot bear, now if you don't believe that, then we clearly have different beliefs more than polygyny.
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi while you speak the truth in theory, you seem to be lacking in the understanding of the nature of women. We can however agree that polygny is lawful for the greater good of society, women’s feelings and emotions seem trivialized, when in fact, it is her very essence. And yes! I do believe that no burden (except for death) is greater than anyone can bear, but why would anyone choose to suffer unnecessary burdens?
Either it's truth or it's theory, not truth in theory. I asked a legit question since you posed something as a right and many people hold a mistaken belief that somehow when a husband practices something lawful she is asserted extra rights. If it's lawful for the greater good of the society like you mentioned, then it seems as though women's emotions and feelings are trivialize in comparison, right? Question is who decided that? Surely it isn't man-made or is it? That being the case, when women start protesting about their right to now exit, as you noted, is that but a manipulation tactic to impact the man's decision? Reviewing our discussion, it seems like you think it's okay for a wife to break up a family when a man chooses to do something that is considered for the greater good of society due to her emotions and feelings? Wouldn't it be more prudent to educate both men and women about how to handle their emotions, feelings, and responsibilities when it comes to the greater good of society so that humanity can flourish morally instead of continuing on the path of degeneracy and moral bankruptcy?
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi I do agree regarding the greater good for society as a whole, however, every individual is unique and comes with their own set of unique personal qualities and even past trauma. Do we agree that everything is not for everybody? I also stand firm that it is her ultimately the first wife’s decision what is in her own best interest; she is most capable of knowing what she can bear. It is evident that the husband will choose to do whatever he wants at the end of the day. The first wife is may be foolish to believe that the husband will decide based upon what is really best for her. I am not saying that children should be implicated and used as weapons. Parents should follow what Islam dictates is correct in any dissolution of marriage. But wives are not prisoners of marriage, if they believe that they have a legitimate reason, separation is halal. That is her human right. A woman has the right to divorce if she believes she is unable keep the duties to her husband and therefore to Allah. I’m not advocating for divorce; but I see that polygny requires more compassion and sensitivity than most men can easily provide. ”Your family” appears to be the exception not the rule to how polygny plays out (I have personally witnessed verbal abuse, physically altercations and endless drama ). Although we may not see from the same perspective; I do agree that we all need more education, training Education and sensitivity training, compassion etc…. I my humble opinion, I don’t find a need to complicate my life in this way. Everyday occurrences in life provide enough complexity. I don’t think it is unreasonable for women to not want to undertake this venture or many to-be able to thrive in such a marriage. My khimaar goes off to the sisters who are willing and able to make such a sacrifice. May Allah bless all who are Islamic enough to embark on this journey and succeed . Ameen
It is not generally viewed as problematic by one who lacks the respect for the other enough to let them know that their own life is to be drastically changed , but it will be viewed as a lack of respect of withholding life changing information by one one offended. And yes! The woman ultimately will determine the success or failure of polygyny. It is ludicrous to think that a man can do this and keep his original wife without her cooperation. So yes, she has the right to seek a separation if she finds it unbearable.
English translation in quran Al'nisa 4:3 and if (you wish to marry them and) you fear that you will not to deal "justly" to the orphan girls then (marry them not, rather) marry of women (other than these) as many be agreeable to you 🗝. (YOU MAY MARRY) two or three or four (provided to be justly to them) 🗝. That whom your right hands possess ( -your female captives of war) THATS IS THE WAY TO AVOID BEING UNJUSTLY.
INOTE: If you get an arabic concordance you can inner-stand quran better from the Arabic language. But the key to that verse is the man must be able to provide, and deal with his wives justly. If a man is not competent and qualified maybe that man should deal with 1 woman. Reason why that is said cause you got alot men/ brothers trying to take on wives, and they can't do it because it's a level of realism, maturity, and truth that one must have. It's not for every one 👍
@@BlackLion76 You literally twisted my words. I said consult not ask, I said CONSULT. Do you know what that word means? It means to DISCUSS! A lot of you so called men don’t really like women, you hate them due to your own dysfunctional relationships with your own mothers. Otherwise you would have no issues sitting down with a woman you love to consult with her your next step in plans for your family. This has nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with being a true leader. Every male isn’t a leader. 🪷🙏🏾
Perhaps what is meant by permission is 'did you ask your wife if she's ok with it?'Or have you discussed it with her?
No people literally mean did the husband ask the wife for permission. Asking how she feels about it is totally different.
@@JustOutHereTrustingGod Exactly, it is totally different. I have coached many wives who wanted to grant their husbands "permission" to marry another wife. ~ Coach Fatimah 👑
Alhamdulillah! 💜السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته Nice little talk among you two.🧕👳♂️ Giving us the scoop on some things! "BE OUTSTANDING" جزاك الله خيرا
The wives relationship might be platonic but for me to even consider it id have to be platonically married to her too. Commiting, consulting, trusting supporting, planning, all things in a marriage would have to be apart of the wives relationship. Lol My platonic wife hahaha but really, without all that itd bring alot of problems. Having that kinda relationship with the other wife would help to avoid jealousy & insecurity. This other woman cares enough about me & my feelings to consult me, trust me, support me, commit to me (as a friend for life) , assuring me shes not trying to replace me...& i do the same...thats what i would need.
Permission is the wrong word, but consultation is really important. All parties need to agree in order to have a harmonious family. And we know for sure that Prophet did consult his wives on serious issues (not polygyny of course) and even listened to them and followed their advice (Umm Salama and the treaty of Hudaybiyyah) It doesn’t threaten manhood in anyway to act on advice from your wife.
All parties needing to agree is. Another way of saying permission, although the rest of what you said is correct.
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi well, what happens if they don’t?
Kindly discuss financial literacy within Polygyny
I have non Muslim childhood friend who waited and froze eggs waiting for his “right time” to address his wife about her . She’s now in her 50s still waiting.
I like when she said(I’m paraphrasing) “We have a discussion about it but he doesn’t need to seek my permission”.
I never understand when I hear that the man married secretly to avoid drama. Isn’t it drama to disrupt your household and not discuss the changes to come?
There will likely be drama either way, many choose to have it later than sooner which is the answer to your question.
Okay what does the quran says
yikes. Flat out if my husband ever wanted to marry someone else I would no longer be his wife and we would be divorced.
Are u muslim?
I like this channel, I also believe that each individuals freedom is vital, he is out of the country, and she wants to go to Chicago, even if he is in a different county he can’t help her either, no freedom no love, control. IMHO
Thank you and we're glad you like the channel. However, we disagree that he can't help her if he's out the country.
A man, as a protector, and in today's time, a husband who knows where his wife(ves) are can make the necessary arrangements for protection.
Example: a protector knowing hot spots in Chicago, can advise where not to go, have people on standby or as a security escort or local friends provide assistance.
That's called respect and using what resources you have. 💪🏽✊🏽👑
It's just a good position as a man to be in. Having your wife lord over you is detrimental to both man and woman imo.
Very good information. Although permission is not required, it is problematic to not offer the same respect that you would want if the shoe were on the other foot. The woman has a right to this discussion and to make a decision about how to proceed with her own life: whether to remain or exit.
Also, although polygny may not (depending on circumstances) be physically harmful to some women, other women may find it excruciating, emotional pain and hurt can be just as devastating if not more so. It is the husband’s first responsibility to protect his wife in more ways than one.
It actually isn't problematic except in one's mind to act as though the shoe is on the other foot.
When you mention that a wife has a 'right', where is this 'right' located in jurisprudence? It is what we consider a best practice for today's times, however, it's a man's right to decide how to move forward with marriage(s). Please provide the daleel for this right.
Sadly, many hypothesize how excruciatingly painful polygyny can be but fail to find out why a form of marriage that has been a very common and normal part of the majority of human existence is now so challenging.
Fact is, social engineering, feminism, and colonial thought has been adopted as the norm and these new beliefs have warped the thinking and mental state of many women.
Naturally no one will be burdened with anything they cannot bear, now if you don't believe that, then we clearly have different beliefs more than polygyny.
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi while you speak the truth in theory, you seem to be lacking in the understanding of the nature of women. We can however agree that polygny is lawful for the greater good of society, women’s feelings and emotions seem trivialized, when in fact, it is her very essence. And yes! I do believe that no burden (except for death) is greater than anyone can bear, but why would anyone choose to suffer unnecessary burdens?
Either it's truth or it's theory, not truth in theory. I asked a legit question since you posed something as a right and many people hold a mistaken belief that somehow when a husband practices something lawful she is asserted extra rights.
If it's lawful for the greater good of the society like you mentioned, then it seems as though women's emotions and feelings are trivialize in comparison, right? Question is who decided that? Surely it isn't man-made or is it?
That being the case, when women start protesting about their right to now exit, as you noted, is that but a manipulation tactic to impact the man's decision?
Reviewing our discussion, it seems like you think it's okay for a wife to break up a family when a man chooses to do something that is considered for the greater good of society due to her emotions and feelings?
Wouldn't it be more prudent to educate both men and women about how to handle their emotions, feelings, and responsibilities when it comes to the greater good of society so that humanity can flourish morally instead of continuing on the path of degeneracy and moral bankruptcy?
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi I do agree regarding the greater good for society as a whole, however, every individual is unique and comes with their own set of unique personal qualities and even past trauma. Do we agree that everything is not for everybody? I also stand firm that it is her ultimately the first wife’s decision what is in her own best interest; she is most capable of knowing what she can bear. It is evident that the husband will choose to do whatever he wants at the end of the day. The first wife is may be foolish to believe that the husband will decide based upon what is really best for her.
I am not saying that children should be implicated and used as weapons. Parents should follow what Islam dictates is correct in any dissolution of marriage. But wives are not prisoners of marriage, if they believe that they have a legitimate reason, separation is halal. That is her human right. A woman has the right to divorce if she believes she is unable keep the duties to her husband and therefore to Allah. I’m not advocating for divorce; but I see that polygny requires more compassion and sensitivity than most men can easily provide.
”Your family” appears to be the exception not the rule to how polygny plays out (I have personally witnessed verbal abuse, physically altercations and endless drama ). Although we may not see from the same perspective; I do agree that we all need more education, training Education and sensitivity training, compassion etc…. I my humble opinion, I don’t find a need to complicate my life in this way. Everyday occurrences in life provide enough complexity. I don’t think it is unreasonable for women to not want to undertake this venture or many to-be able to thrive in such a marriage.
My khimaar goes off to the sisters who are willing and able to make such a sacrifice. May Allah bless all who are Islamic enough to embark on this journey and succeed . Ameen
It is not generally viewed as problematic by one who lacks the respect for the other enough to let them know that their own life is to be drastically changed , but it will be viewed as a lack of respect of withholding life changing information by one one offended. And yes! The woman ultimately will determine the success or failure of polygyny. It is ludicrous to think that a man can do this and keep his original wife without her cooperation. So yes, she has the right to seek a separation if she finds it unbearable.
He’s not your child, but your partner. I think when you’re partner’s in anything in life you should at the least consult the other partner. 😁
Wrong.
He's the husband, the head of the family, and NOT a "partner," which implies a 50/50 feminist relationship model that doesn't work.
@@BlackLion76🙄
English translation in quran Al'nisa 4:3 and if (you wish to marry them and) you fear that you will not to deal "justly" to the orphan girls then (marry them not, rather) marry of women (other than these) as many be agreeable to you 🗝. (YOU MAY MARRY) two or three or four (provided to be justly to them) 🗝. That whom your right hands possess ( -your female captives of war) THATS IS THE WAY TO AVOID BEING UNJUSTLY.
INOTE: If you get an arabic concordance you can inner-stand quran better from the Arabic language. But the key to that verse is the man must be able to provide, and deal with his wives justly. If a man is not competent and qualified maybe that man should deal with 1 woman.
Reason why that is said cause you got alot men/ brothers trying to take on wives, and they can't do it because it's a level of realism, maturity, and truth that one must have. It's not for every one 👍
@@BlackLion76 You literally twisted my words. I said consult not ask, I said CONSULT. Do you know what that word means? It means to DISCUSS! A lot of you so called men don’t really like women, you hate them due to your own dysfunctional relationships with your own mothers. Otherwise you would have no issues sitting down with a woman you love to consult with her your next step in plans for your family. This has nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with being a true leader. Every male isn’t a leader. 🪷🙏🏾
The Prophet s.a.w. never asked any ov his wives permission to get married again.
Yeah what's the quran says