WHEN THE INFJ GETS GHOSTED ONE TOO MANY TIMES (this happens)
Вставка
- Опубліковано 8 вер 2024
- Free INFJ EPIC LIFE Formula Poster: infjformula.gr...
Get the INFJ Audio GUIDE TODAY!!! wenzes.thinkif...
Join INFJ Bootcamp Waiting List bootcampwaitin...
Free 5 Pillars to an INFJ EPIC LIFE Poster: bit.ly/5pillars...
Get the INFJ Audio GUIDE TODAY!!! wenzes.thinkif...
INFJ Life Coach Lesson: Ghosting is a major game-changer for INFJs. It makes them feel vulnerable and unprotected, which can lead to feelings of worthlessness or even depression if they're not careful about bouncing back from these breakups quickly enough with help from their close friends/ romantic partners who care deeply for them as well! But the truth is, when INFJs get ghosted often enough, they become invincible.
All INFJ EPIC LIFE Programs: programs.wenze...
Free Resources: wenzes.com/INF...
Website: www.wenzes.com/
Instagram: / wenzes_
Facebook: / coachwenzes
#INFJ #INFJLIFECOACH #LIFECOACHING
Have you been ghosted more often than most?
🤔I dunno if it's 'ghosting' but what I do is use humor that stings a bit to seperate the wheat from the chaff. I simply do not have the strenght to deal with people who are so unlike me that I have to bend over backwards to just get along.
People who get me stick around and those who don't simply avoid me like the plague.
😕I guess I've never been 'ghosted,' cauz I do the 'ghosting'?
Right now I'm in ghosted period of 6 months, but slowly I'm giving up slowly I'm healing
How am I supposed to know?
Yes, and its ok. I got so run over the top of that when I finally set a truth boundary up they ghost. BUT, I think it is what we wanted anyway. We get sick of putting up with being used like a door mat. Like telling your friend , no you are not a rock star.
I feel like I have. It's hard to figure out why at times. 12:40 I often felt like I was more selfish than others because that's what others taught me I was. It was only later that I figured out that others often had selfish motives and what they call selfish is relative
I'm done with being ghosted
Ghost me and I slam the door now
You posted this right as I’m being ghosted by a friend I made a few months ago. I’m taking this as a sign I’m on the right track. It’s very painful but I know that I’m not too deep or too much. Some people are simply too shallow to handle us once they get to know us. Thank you so much for all you do Wenzes, it’s been such a help to me.
OMG same , this post came right ive been ghosted ! by my dearest friend unfortunatly , we met in 2019 , he did it the first time two years ago , disappeared for a whole year , that first time i was devastated , nothing hurted me more than this in my entire life , i felt like that person is not who i thought he was , that i was creating fantasies about that perfect friend that soulmate , that everything we ever experience or said was a LIE , eventhough it was true , our spiritual bond was intense and our mutual energies flamboyant , it was incredible , maybe thats why i overvalued that person , by the end of the day , im in doubt that this person believes the same at all , anyway that first time i felt aweful its like someone stabbing you in the back and through your heart CONSTANTLY , i felt disrespected and undervalued , i felt that all what we shared didnt count for a damn , and that i wasnt enough and wasnt a priority , or simply as you said , they couldnt handle us , they were cowards and got chickened away , what a freaking dissapointement , and after this he came back after 10 BLOODY MONTHS asking for forgiveness, as an INFJ u can already guess that i gave him second chance , nd only after we started patching up the pieces nd fixing them , gaining back some trust, nd had great projects again , only then , when i let my guard down and started feeling confident nd like its a new beginning and everything is forgotten nd we started to (re) build a stronger friendship , he blew me off , didnt show up for the plans , disappeared without explanations again ,canceled them in my back , nd i didnt hear from him for two months , again he showed up nd explained the shitty circumstances under his absence , of course , u can guess , as an understanding INFJ , i kinda see where he came from , his point of view , bein empathetic , i decided to stand beside him in that rough period , and forgive his rude behaviour ONCE AGAIN , and we had a deal , a compromise , i told him if ur ever gonna go again withut telling me for more than a month , forget about my ass ,,, it was all good , until he did it again recently , for the summer , we had plenty plenty of plans and projects , we spent the whole year dreaming about them !!!!! , u can imagine , the depth of my dissapointement and the excruciating pain i felt , when he didnt show up the whole summer , last time we talked it was in june , we agreed everything was alright , then nothing until now ,
im confused up to this point , do i have to set boundaries more properly , punish him more harshly this time ? , not treating him the same until he recognize his fault and work on them , or just drop this case , and walk away , forget about him like he never existed
Good for you, buddy. This INFJ has your back. -INFJ (gal)
Have I been ghosted more often than most? Yes. With me being the only INFJ in the family, it happens to me plenty. It also happens to me at work some as well. I just think to myself, "Oh well. I'll let 'em figure it out on their own". And then I pick up where I left off and continue on. When I was really young, it would hurt my feelings such to be ghosted and ignored. Nowadays that I'm older, it doesn't bother me like that.
Be yourself! Don’t shrink yourself!
The people that matter don’t mind!
The people that mind don’t matter!
At 53 i thank all who ghosted me! Earlier it hurt!! I realise i would have ghosted them in the long run anyways and thank them for doing me a favour. As i have myself ghosted few hanger ons and for sensitive INFJs it's not an easy thing to do as we don't want to hurt anyone on purpose or in spite..
@Logan Legend oh ok..i meant people who refuse to let go..in this case 'me' as they always find ways to get help from me knowing i would not refuse, but I would not receive the same if i asked, and as an INFJ i am usually very independent to ask for help anyways..
Still kinda hurts though. You start running out of people and wonder when the mothership will call you back home.
With every ghost Ive experienced, it only made me stronger. I did however, fall into a dark state of mind for a long time trying to figure why people can do such terrible things and if I did something wrong although I knew I did none. I was able to crawl out of the darkness after making my mind, heart, and soul stronger by letting go of those who do not reciprocate the energy I give. Being drained is a dreadful feeling. Today I look back at my old self and I knew Id be laughing at how weak I was to give myself to others and expected the same energy. Im now in a much better place mentally and emotionally after the harrowing journey through the darkness. I believe in all of my fellow INFJs, I know that you will all become whole one day if youre currently struggling. Trust me, you will become stronger one day. Never give up and believe in yourself to the fullest. I love you all
I've been ghosted constantly my whole life! Even as a child I could see why they made me disappear. I saw them, the real them! I loved the weakness in them, like heart strings love. Rarely someone likes that you see it. Most people hate the weakness in themselves and you seeing it means you are gone. They can be standing right next to you everyday for years, but you are gone. You no longer exist to them. Eventually I got so tired of it that when people would try to date me I would explain why they didn't. I would tell them that while I AM This person they see now that I also am many other things and Eventually you are going to realize that the other things that I am are not qualities you like and you will ghost me. Of course they never believed me, and probably didn't even realize I was right when they left.
so true...spot on
I've realised I can only be taken in small doses by the faint hearted 😂
Absolutely I've been ghosted my whole life (starting with family members) As an INFJ, my least developed functions are Fi and Te; when used together it's a destructive combo in my relationships. I've learned to show love though "Acts of Service" in using my Fe/Se functions☺️ Over the many years of being ghosted, my bounce back game is strong 💪
Holy crap, there are many of us out here, wow. I hear ya, bigtime. It is such a shame for all involved, in a way.
But INFJ is usually such a lonely world. Sometimes I feel like I'm head of my time or an alien. I don't look to fit in per say, but to only find my tribe, to only find I don't really know anyone else like me in my place of existence. Sometimes I feel like I'm cracking up because I'm so sensitive to the spirit & susceptible to a higher cause it's more like a curse than a blessing to feel this out of place. Sometimes I just wish I could turn it (INFJ- weirdness) off.
You are sane, and fine, I promise you. I am a woman, INFJ, in middle age, I was an art professor until recently. Here’s the deal, when you think you’ve found your tribe, you will be surprised to discover, that you don’t want to be in the tribe, after all. We are strange, in that, we think we want to fit in, somewhere, somehow, and when we do, we are immediately driven to exit the “group”. We don’t like groups, cliques, or institutions, as they breed “group think” which leads to power dynamics that are unhealthy. We don’t want to be beholden to any group, or person, a slave to no one and nothing. This surprised me, but pleasantly.
@@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied hi, I'm sorry that I'm just seeing your reply. I hope you & your family had a wonderful Thanksgiving! I do want a tribe, but truth is, I don't fit in with any category.
I have an awesome relationship with my teenagers & two are three very close friends that I speak with on a regular basis. So I'm very grateful! An Art Professor? Wow, that sounds amazing!
This is always painful when it happens. But it's been my experience that I'd later find out that the person who ghosted me actually did me a favor, even if it wasn't planned that way. In retrospect, I realized that it reduced the hassle in my life.
I had a situation something like this where later the person actually came back! But by that time I simply terminated the relationship. I was fed up, and let it be known.
I called it "Taking care of and respecting myself."
Yeah, I've helped soooooo many people in their lives, like allowing them to stay in my home when they have no income. But now I live alone and none of them will call or text me. I'm invisible!!
This happened to me so many times and always when I would Crack a joke.. I'm not gonna hollow myself out anymore for people I don't know. I don't like doubting myself
Oh I'm definitely too much 😂 Luckily we're also introverts, so we learn when it's time to end the conversation and be alone for a while.
Feel it to heal it 🥰
Was engaged to someone who would ghost me from time to time. I permanently ghosted her back.
If sombody ghosts you, it's simple, ghost back :-)
I'm always getting GHOSTED!!!! Thanks for sharing:)
After being ghosted in 2018, it became clear to me that I can always have me. That person do not and will never deserve my good heart.
Definitely a life trend. Thanks for this. It has been a painful truth for me for the past few years. This video helped to make more sense of it. I love that all of your videos reinforce the message of doing things for yourself and liking yourself. It helps to hear it from someone who understands how to present the idea, not just following some general message to tell myself nice things every day. That has not been helpful, switching my perspective is starting to be much more helpful.
We got your back, fellow INFJ. -INFJ
I've had this happen a multitude of times. You eventually come to understand you were not meant to fit in or connect with these people because there is no common ground, as you said.
It makes us feel invincible because INFJ's are resilient and good at bouncing back. This affirms how strong we are. And it is good because it empties our life of what isn't right for us frees us from other people's toxic negativity and allows us a place for something new and meaningful to enter our lives where we can be truly accepted and loved and cherished for who we are and not just where we are tolerated. Because we deserve better.
I have no problems being ghosted; it just means we're on different wavelengths, so it's probably best that they're not in my life anymore. This will sound mean, but sometimes I wish it would happen more often! If I am not sure whether someone should be in my life, I reveal more of my true self to test the other person and then sit back and watch. Sometimes they surprise me. Most often not, but things work out for the best in the end.
Thanks Wenzes!!!
I've been ghosted so much that by the time i pass on, i'm already an expert in the spirit realm and friends with most spirits there...
Enfp girl here. I think you have beautiful eyes! 😍
The third level achieved. Let's go! But it has been a painful process, which is an understatement.
While I've never been technically ghosted, I do notice that when I try to open up to people, they tend to pull away. It makes me afraid to open up around anyone or try to be friends with anyone. I specifically remember a time when I had won a gift card to a coffee shop and invited some friends to go with me some time to hang out. They kept making excuses that they were busy with work, with classes, with church, the excuses went on and on. I just gave up asking any of them to hang out from that point on. I figured, why bother?
So, you just described in detail "being ghosted'! Technically....
@@tibo5828 I still saw them when I went to church, so it wasn't like I never saw them, but I guess you could call it ghosting.
@@HaleyMary 👍
Are you sure you aren’t an INTJ? I mean this sincerely, unless you are younger, in which case, strap on that seatbelt. Hang on. It’s a bit of a roller coaster, but you will get through it. It isn’t about you, it is about them. This sounds like the worst advice for most people, with the exception of infjs. It is possible that you are mistyped, which is common. Either way, just stay humble, independent, and free thinking, and you will be fine.
Happens to me all the time. Half the people I work with won't even say hi to me unless I say hi. Some people won't even say hi back.the more this Happens to me the colder I get.
Yep. Yep yep. Ghosted? Ha! Sometimes I wonder if I made them up... I used to spend years analysing my personality, my social awareness etc. The last ghosting event was this job where I was building products for a school. we had a deal where I was bringing in business in forms of part time classes to augment what was missing in their institution. My classes grew almost instantly, with a 100% client satisfaction. I even got onto the state newspaper with one of the projects and had a plan for a full time program (Which they knew was always going to be proposed). Come the next semester, the staff and CEO sit me down and say the reason they haven't been answering my emails, or phone calls is because I was mean to each of them one time (no actual examples) and they felt they could not work with me anymore. Truly a mind bending moment for me. I had given the business a successful year and their answer was I was too much.
Now though Ghosting is part of my expectation. I make my play, focus on getting it right, do it and move on to the next. I'll keep an ear to it, if there is knowledge to be gleaned but I move on. I also realised that I need to move towards leadership and dont hide. I'm focused on those goals. I am who I am.
I had a similar situation with a company I was applying for. I made it into the top 3 but then they flaked on me giving a bullshit excuse on why they couldn't give me that apprenticeship. Apparently, there were nuances not fitting in with the company... Their words... And also their loss because after that defeat I went to university instead, got hired in public service and now we are sharing the building with that exact company from before, acquiring their employees one by one.
I couldn't see it back then, but today it's so obvious that they were afraid of not being able to contain me. They knew I would eventually outgrow them and didn't want to invest their resources into someone who one day will set them up and leave.
@@HoshPak The Youre-just-too-much effect. For a long time I thought I was coming across as arrogant. Now I know showing competence is scary for some people. I bet you are much happier being in a leaderships position?
@@mongiwekhaya1201 haven't had the opportunity to be in a real leadership position, so far but I got a taste of that in some community-related situations. While it feels good to be in charge I found others to always question me given how straightforward and abrasive I can be when leading. So now, I pretty much prefer being in 2nd place as the constant fighting has tired me out. Instead, I can push my ideas via an agreeable front man without ever appearing in front the nay-sayers. I guess I'm entering machiavellian territory here but rest assured I'm using this power responsibly and only when there's no other way. Deep down I'm loving people with passion even though they tend to give me hard time.
"I had to lose the game I was playing in order to level up." 13:10 Thank youuu, I need that. I keep trying to win their game in their world on their terms. -.-
May I just say that INFJs can also attract or entertain relationships with emotionally unavailable people, many of whom may have a Dismissive Avoidant or Fearful Avoidant attachment style. This is because of the INFJs tendency to want to empathise/rescue/mentor these individuals. Avoidant personalities are generally afraid of abandonment (childhood wounds) and therefore when intimacy grows (which it always will when an INFJ is involved), they tend to deactivate/distance. They will often ghost people who get too close, and INFJs are the types of personalities that entertain a relationship/situationship with them longer than other personality types, because of toxic empathy.
Oh yeah, getting ghosted by friends and girls is literally the story of my life... 😢
Hope you have a great day Wenzes! 😊🌹❤
The right girl, will be amazing. You get to weed out all the wrong ones. I can’t wait until she finds you…-loved from an INFJ (gal)
I used to take it personally, yet by 30 years old if someone ghosts me I'm glad because they were a flaky piece of 💩 if it ends up that way. Their loss, I'm much better off without them. My ex bestie ghosted me and a year later she died. I came across a friend who was with her on her death bed and she was sad because nobody was there for her except people who were just distant acquaintances. It showed me how karma works. People who ghost true friends are likely to end up alone. Sucks to be them.
I don't give a fuck lol if someone ghosts me, previously I used to feel bad but not anymore because people who love and accept me for who I am will stay and if someone doesn't, then it's okay.
Testify!
We moved so much when I was younger, I experienced ghosting based on just being away from people. Now I think it was a good training for me 😅
I have always gotten ghosted by family and friends. I give up talking to them. It is very painful to say the least!
Yes. Quite often but I don’t take it personally anymore. Thanks for your wonderful videos. 🙏🏼
From the first word to the last, I couldn't believe. It felt like you were talking to me. I am in the situation now at work, they won't promote me, when I am capable of doing the next job. I have worked so hard to prove myself, but they just don't think I am up to it. It's becoming very toxic for me. It has happened so many times, I am finally accepting how wonderful I am. Not weird, not good enough, but more mature and able, than the people who are making these recruitment decisions. I had to face this negative circumstance many times, and at last I realise my real strength. Thank you.
I've ghosted many ppl but also have had been ghosted .. yikes! 😬
I sat & listened to this was a face plant!! 🤭........your insight/ advice is life changing! Subscribed!.....I had narcistic parents & wife of 30 years...finally reclaiming my truth. 🙂
I get ghosted a lot when people owe me.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. This came to me in perfect timing. It’s exactly what I needed to hear word for word. I appreciate you ❤️
Hang in, Aimee, you seem like a lovely person, and I bet you sing beautifully. You got this INFJ in your corner. -INFJ
I was ghosted in elementary school! Am well used to it now. It frees up time for important things.
I like playing the puppeteer on the harder things. I expect to get ghosted 👻 😂
Your eyes are awesome
💯💯
I honestly couldn’t care less if I am rejected or ghosted. To me that just means the person wasn’t a really good fit for me and often was taking too much from me. good luck to them, but I’d rather be without them.
It all started when I was ghosted by my father at age 2. Then "mentors" at school did so as well. Then romantic prospects/potential friends. Sigh
I've become grateful for the lesson of the truth of impermanence.
whoa :) !, from "not enough" to "too much" , thats a far stretch for me , im processing it , its even relieving !
Life is a Souls game.. It kicks your ass, but the harder it swings the better you become for overcoming it!
I don't say it would be ghosted but I've had people more than one cancel or change plans or be late. It is one of my pet peeves. I give them a few chances but then I don't engage with them anymore. One reason I got used to doing things alone.
It's still sad, just trying to help and everything becomes weird.
I'm giving less and less fuck. Just hope to not become a cold dead man walking. Sometimes it seems I'm going that way.
Honestly after all the ghosting - now I'm the one who ghost because I don't need toxic ppl, like passive aggressive behavior 🙄
Wenzes you are a Godsend! 😭❤️
I'm someone who has tended to assume that there must be something about me which others don't like (mostly I think this when I'm feeling lonely and depressed). So, thanks for this video. It really helps.
Yes absolutely right. I think I'm at the point where I have realized I am tired of making myself small. Why should I dim my light for those not willing to see the real me.
100% agree with this video. I have been ghosted many times because I point out the actions of others who are fake and flaky. I am suspicious of people and don't have friends.
Also. If anyone has an answer to this, maybe I can exhale for a minute. Let’s say that we’re ghosted by a romantic interest, or someone that we’re in a relationship with. By a non toxic person who is not personality disordered (ie npd bpd). What’s there self justification for hurting someone? Even if it’s not as much from the loss but of the self doubt that will shoot through the roof after being ghosted. I’m far from perfect but if there’s something that I’m doing, even if it’s almost entirely subconscious, my morals wouldn’t allow me to knowingly hurt someone. So the question is, are these “non toxic’s” also toxic (depending on the context)? I know that many people struggle with humility, but am I being obtuse to think that one of these people could easily write an honest letter explaining their view, to at least maybe save you immense pain? They’re so scared of their ego and being seen as exactly what they are (they’re even less) that your pain is irrelevant. Seems like we’re not getting a good deal here. 😂😂😂 If I wasn’t so opposed to it, I’d become a recluse that pays for women. When I get deep into thought about the state of dating and that I don’t know I’ve ever met someone remotely close to my level. I think maybe forcing myself to pay for women may be the easier path compared to infj dating.
this post came right ive been ghosted ! by my dearest friend unfortunatly , we met in 2019 , he did it the first time two years ago , disappeared for a whole year , that first time i was devastated , nothing hurted me more than this in my entire life , i felt like that person is not who i thought he was , that i was creating fantasies about that perfect friend that soulmate , that everything we ever experience or said was a LIE , eventhough it was true , our spiritual bond was intense and our mutual energies flamboyant , it was incredible , maybe thats why i overvalued that person , by the end of the day , im in doubt that this person believes the same at all , anyway that first time i felt aweful its like someone stabbing you in the back and through your heart CONSTANTLY , i felt disrespected and undervalued , i felt that all what we shared didnt count for a damn , and that i wasnt enough and wasnt a priority , or simply as you said , they couldnt handle us , they were cowards and got chickened away , what a freaking dissapointement , and after this he came back after 10 BLOODY MONTHS asking for forgiveness, as an INFJ u can already guess that i gave him second chance , nd only after we started patching up the pieces nd fixing them , gaining back some trust, nd had great projects again , only then , when i let my guard down and started feeling confident nd like its a new beginning and everything is forgotten nd we started to (re) build a stronger friendship , he blew me off , didnt show up for the plans , disappeared without explanations again ,canceled them in my back , nd i didnt hear from him for two months , again he showed up nd explained the shitty circumstances under his absence , of course , u can guess , as an understanding INFJ , i kinda see where he came from , his point of view , bein empathetic , i decided to stand beside him in that rough period , and forgive his rude behaviour ONCE AGAIN , and we had a deal , a compromise , i told him if ur ever gonna go again withut telling me for more than a month , forget about my ass ,,, it was all good , until he did it again recently , for the summer , we had plenty plenty of plans and projects , we spent the whole year dreaming about them !!!!! , u can imagine , the depth of my dissapointement and the excruciating pain i felt , when he didnt show up the whole summer , last time we talked it was in june , we agreed everything was alright , then nothing until now ,
im confused up to this point , do i have to set boundaries more properly , punish him more harshly this time ? , not treating him the same until he recognize his fault and work on them , or just drop this case , and walk away , forget about him like he never existed
Thank you Wenzes ! It’s very heartwarming to see things from this perspective! Reject is so difficult sometimes!
This is a great video . I’m totally understanding others better. No one is as deep . I get it.
Your videos are truly helpful and motivating 😄
So true. Everything you said in this video has played out in my life many times.
Thank you, Wenzeslawa! This is very much relatable to me.
Too much Socrates and not enough Doris Day and the ghosting begins. Not enough lalalalala.
My step-sister visited me where I live for the 1st time a while back. As I am an artist, musician, and I work in the trades, she took one look around my place and said, "I can see how someone could feel intimidated by you, Sis." And her fella was like, "Would you even have time for a relationship?"
As for ghosting, I have indeed recently reached 3rd level 💯. A long distance friend blocked me after something I said meaning no harm whatsoever. I really looked at what I said, how I may have taken it had someone said it to me, the times I have taken what others have had to say to me poorly and pushed them away. I concluded I may have done the very same thing and have no hard feelings.
You ghost me I really don't care there's alot going in this life more important than me caring about ghosting...you ghost I ghost life goes on
Just waiting out the storm now 😤😮💨😁 the 1 in my head
you're so pretty to be ghosted those people who ghosted you were ghosts themselves
I want to give your inner child a hug (and I will prioritize it over hugging my own). ❤️
Not the first time you've delivered a timely reassurance! Thank you!....and I'm only half way through! 😀
You're vids are ALWAYS so on point. Thank-YOU
oh now we have an ifj life coach! i like it tho!! thanks for sharing
I love what you’ve shared with us in this video. I especially like your notes on being “too much”, and I wanted to share some thoughts that I had while listening. My feeling is that this “too much” you were talking about is not an objective “too much”, but rather a highly subjective and contextual one… and towards the end of your video, it does sound to me like this is a little more of the meaning you are leaning towards. For me, it’s not so much a question of being “too much” objectively, in principle, across the board, everywhere and for everyone - rather, it is a question of *whom* we are too much for. “Too much” has to be measured against something, and what we are measuring against is the people we currently have surrounding us. They are the context in which we are “too much”. That part isn’t subjective. I’m not arguing for subjectivity in whether or not we are too much in a given environment; rather I am trying to say that being “too much” is not an objective personality trait that defines us, but rather a subjective and contextual identification or label based in the perspective of a certain environment. We are too much for these people. We are too big for this room. But I love what you said at the end - if we are too big in this current environment, we need to find a bigger tank! That’s exactly where I think we need to focus our attention. It’s not so much about acknowledging and apologizing for our intensity, strength, eccentricities, etc, but rather about finding the right people who will recognize, value, love, and even sometimes revere these qualities in us, rather than being overwhelmed, intimidated, and scared by them.
Makes sense...🤓 Thank you for sharing dear! ❤️
Lol wow. Yes been ghosted like crazy. Got a whole graveyard of ghosts 😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣me too
yeah but sometimes some people are just narcissistic nd wanna keep u hanging , under their spell , or sometimes its just someone who is so rude and selfish and inconsidering and who doesnt give a fuck nd have you at the bottom of his priority list, its not always about us , im so fed up with bringing it back to us as if its a positive experience, theres nothing positive in it , thats the worst thing that can happen , it means that u overestimated ur importance in somebody's life , somebody who is clearly unworthy of u who couldnt handle it so he chickened away nd acted cowardly and selfishly and hurt you along the way , it means that we chose the wrong person , not that we're too much , because if someone cares enough and love you enough and have little respect for you he would never pull that cruel move , he would rather be honest and tell you you are not the one for him that ur too intense or smthn , and i understand it may occurs on the inconscious level , but still , a word of consideration never hurt anybody , so this behaviour tells you nothing about you but everything about them
Hell, I know why... contact with INFPs. 😘
In my AA groups I am being given the silent treatment by several guys and girls, and one rapist. None of them have a valid reason for doing this to me because I haven't done anything to them and keep a fairly low-key profile. I don't chase girls because I'm still trying to recover from living with a narc wife for 22 years and one day, she just walked out the door and never came back home. I'm happy she is gone but it took some brain unscrambling to get me here. I avoid most of the guys simply because I don't like their attitude towards other people. It's just me and that's the way it is.
Great video! Very insightful wenzes!
Happens to me all the time and thay is why I give myself the the ghost who walks
people are people... I don't really care.. Everyone has the right to be alone..
But I never forget them and hate them for that..
I judge people only for mean stuff (things I don't wanna do to them)...
Yes I have been been the target of ghosting before, maybe not a lot, but even infrequently doesn't feel great. It is another one of those things that it has made a difference to recognize what it is and also that I'm not the only one. I have even on rare occasion been the ghoster myself, but that is only been in extreme circumstances when I felt pushed to that measure, although it is something that will always feel like it's going against my natural self, which has in turn in some way helped me even try to make sense of being ghosted myself. In any event it is something that I view as a negative thing, but the more I've learned, it seems like one of those things that is based in emotion, and can even sometimes seen more complex then it actually is, especially the way we process it as INFJS, but the video offers great perspective of dealing with it as an INFJ, 👍😃
Here I am, listening to this right after being recently ghosted by my 3 blood sisters.
That hurts sooo bad. They’ve always done this to me but I’m slowly learning how to get over it and try to heal from it thanks to beautiful people like you.
But right now, I’m currently getting myself ready to head out in just a bit, to go have lunch with my 3 non-blood sisters!🤗
My family does not like me either. It is a bitter pill to swallow, and I can't fully accept it but must try. I have been ghosted at school and work, but family ghosting is the worst. Best wishes to you.
@@mariagordanier3404 - Thank you🌼💚
Best wishes to you, also. I’m sorry to read this about your family but I’m also not surprised.
It’s getting easier and easier with time, in my experience. It’s almost not even a big deal anymore. I have my husband and my kids and they all love me and accept me, completely. I even have a few close friends. I still have a bit of a relationship with one of my sisters but even she ghosts me whenever the three of them get together. I still have my grandmother. We visit and I clean her place because she’s verrry advanced in age, now. My mother and I still speak but not often and we’re not close. Honestly, I always say, “it’s not over till it’s over” because I’ve been pleasantly surprised before so I still believe it could happen one day. That said, if it’s meant to be it will be in a way that allows space for me and my big, intense personality. If not, I know I can accept and move on because of all the people who *do* truly love *me* and not just some small, constructed character version of me that I simply won’t play anymore. Ever.
Healing takes time and I hope you and I both make a full and glorious recovery🤗🌼💚
Blood, shmud. You can’t choose your relatives, and if they are being objectively unfair, it is completely reasonable to stay away from them. I have a similar circumstance, and while it baffles me, I don’t engage with them in ways that leave me vulnerable to their nonsense. I relate to them in the ways that aren’t, and when those run out, I don’t engage at all. It is sad, but it takes two, and when one side refuses to compromise, repeatedly, it is in our best interest to let that relationship go. People go through stages and phases, your sisters may come in and out of your life; just set your internal terms, and stick with these boundaries forever. You are right.
My friendships, with the most spectacular people I have ever been in relationships with, are all channeled. Some stay in touch daily through very specific and consistent synchronistic events .. One day I finally introduced my wife to it and said to her.. "pay attention, this may happen /expect this.." She now points out the hello's, the nuances and its possible meaning, sometimes even before I see them.. or miss them (astonished.. because she can't believe how frequent the synchro stuff happens) If I told this to anyone other than anonymously in a board like this one, I'd probably be ghosted immediately. I'm totally cool and absolutely elated by the experience. They only know one language: love. Know me thoroughly and their respect and understanding is only describable as perfect.. It's just beautiful. In fact it all coincides with going through some of the most connected, centered, focused, joyful and successful time of my life. I'm posting this only because I'm aware that it could be beneficial for some. ⚛
I Ghost a Lot too actually
Me too 🤣
Thank you so much
Thank you
This world has to get used to (Damn)me…😏
I got hurt b adly before I found out what I was and assumed my position, power and money. Now those who have hurt me now have to pay me back for thier misdeeds. This comes in the form of sueing them, untill they run out of money. Money is nothing to me, yet its sooo ez to make now that I am whole, thanks in part to Wenzes.
a lot of people have not be ghosted... until they go on dating app ^^
Does ghosting mean that friends and family don't want to have anything to do with you?
Yeah, like they go out to lunch everyday but never invite you.
So basically people, that has some fear about being negatively juged or have some self esteem issues on any complexes will fell safer not being around us :) Which is everybody.. :)
👍😊❣️
💚
Ok yeah so I've done all that. I even really like myself. But I'm still not attracting like minded or healthy people. Still kept on the torture cell to the point where I'm sorry but I don't think there is one person out there that is even worth me, my mind, my heart or my talent... Any ideas?
I always get ghosted
Me to 🤣
💯💯💯
Why we get ghosted, because of their insecurity issues