Check out the daily upside here! bit.ly/3HeBdUp In keeping with the theme of this video I will be donated the fee I get from them to ‘Sean’s place’ it’s a charity local to me that does great work.
My advice - I’m a very happy 58yr old who will retire soon: 1. Build a balanced life career + friends + hobbies + sports + interests + family + children + marriage 2. Appreciate the free things nature has given us - sea, woods, trails, wildlife, air, rain, wind, body, senses, colours, 3. Save for rainy days/retirement 4. Stay fit & in shape, 5. Always leave toxic work environments/people
4 months in and having been really busy with moving house, helping my kids move houses, holiday etc am now twiddling me thumbs ! Only so much running, squash & biking I can do in a week. Ordered a couple more “retirement” books and putting feelers out for p/t work 🫨
I would say same, this is a great review on happiness! So glad i clicked and watched. I relate to this because someone wanted to borrow money from me and I worried and contemplated for few nights coz its just so dear, and today God said I should be using every bit of opportunity to do charity and love, and so I said yes even if I’m uncertain. I have saved the money and it’s just in the bank, but that moment where the receiver just felt so relieved and thankful that I could be an instrument for them to alleviate their frustration and problems made me realize that I am lucky in so many ways and that made me happy, that moment you mentioned that the act of giving (time or resource) is a key to happiness - it’s weird but it works. Gave me a sense of purpose for a moment. Sorry for this litany and I could go on and on. Lol. But Thank you for caring about happiness and creating this content! 😊
This video is so true. One thing I also recommend is learning to low-level enjoy the things you do every day like breakfast, shower, going to the loo, walking the dog, driving the car etc.
This was such a good video with real practical advice as well as the more philosophical side of things. As a Muslim, charity is a huge part of my faith. In Islam, if you can't afford to give money away you're encouraged to view looking after your family as charity e.g feeding your loved ones. Even smiling at another person is classed as an act of charity. It doesn't cost anything to be kind!
Working as a care assistant has made me value the ability to walk around without needing assistance which seems so simple but it really is something to appreciate if you have that ability.
Few years ago I had a horrible accident and spent a lot of time in the hospital. The only thing that helped me not to sink into a big black hole of misery was my loved ones and photos on my phone from all the wonderful times and experiences I had over the years. I’m glad I was always interested in this topic and really researched things like happiness, old age regrets etc very early in life. I think it really helped me not to put my attention in the wrong places. Became minimalist in my early 20, prioritized giving and making memories.
Caring for my belongings helps too. If I’m tired of my car, I do a full detail on it. It helps. I only care for things in that way because I value them.
Yes, I think money can buy happiness, because more money reduces the financial stress, improves the living standards and access to better healthcare. I remember all too well when I was a student, I had a tooth that grew sideways and started to rot, but I had no money to get it removed. For over a year I was dealing with the constant pain of that tooth slowly rotting away. I didn't sleep well and got underweight by losing over 20 pounds because eating was painful. When I finally had the money to get it out, it was such a relief; even when I think of it now, I remember how nice that was. Finally almost no pain and being able to sleep much better. However, while that was about 10 years ago, I still have pain in the jaw from time to time, because a nerve was permanently damaged as well. I definitely learned a lot of it, most importantly that money actually does buy happiness and that people don't give a crap about suffering of others.
I tend to realise in retrospect that I've been happy, but am often too wrapped up in things to notice at the time. Having a strong sense of purpose seems to be a key element.
It's worth noting, in a time when giving money may feel challenging for many, that giving time can be every bit as rewarding. I started volunteering at a repair cafe and it's been so satisfying, I've met wonderful people who have become friends and the sense of joy I feel when we fix a visitors treasured item is lasting and satisfying. Use your skills to help others and be kind, I promise you will be rewarded for it.
I really appreciate how you don't cut at the end of sentence and just monologue. The pauses instead of the cuts makes it feel more genuine and not just another produced video
In terms of consumerism though, I buy things through the lense of "is it useful, will it help me" so I might spend £500 on headphones, or £200 on hiking boots, but its not out of impulse, and they serve a person. Mindless consumerism to keep up with the Jones' is what you want to avoid. Consuming quality products that add value to your life is a useful endeavour, and also a byproducts of a consumerist society, we can't demonise everything.
I've always gotten crap for focusing so much on the past, but where I am now I feel like my tendency to think about my past every single day is a blessing to my happiness. I have PTSD, and get stuck thinking about the traumas of my past and how horrific and miserable it was. But when I come back to reality, I look at my big house and my happy relationship and my disability support and how hard I've worked and how far I've come to build this peaceful life for myself after growing up miserable, and every day my appreciation for what I have is refreshed. I grew up impoverished and am now middle class, and that increase in income drastically improved my happiness, but since I'm often comparing it to where I started it doesn't really get old.
As a Christian that doesn't come as a surprise. In our local congregation we help each other - sometimes just buying food for each other if someone is in a rough spot. Seeing the difference in that persons day makes all the difference. Giving makes happier than receiving. And if we do, it's likely going to be reciprocated when you yourself are struggling.
I recently entered the legal profession in family law, and my job has made me so thankful for my husband and little family we have made. So thankful for the peace we have, even if materially we don’t have much. I’ve already seen and heard horrific stories that leave me on the verge of tears. It baffles me how truly priceless kindness can be and yet it seems to be lacking throughout too many people.
It wasn't until I had a disk hernia that needed spinal surgery and almost cost me the ability to walk that I truly became grateful and happy just to be able to walk and move freely each day. Really interesting ideas in this video, thanks.
Most people who you hear in media are rather rich. So for them, it doesn't buy happiness, as they have too much of it. IMHO one of the reasons why extremely rich are prone to suicide is the fact they don't have to interact with other people the normal way and create social connections as they can buy almost all they want. When I need the bus driver to stop for me somewhere he doesn't have to, I have to be nice to him and so on. People are social animals.
I've been thinking about swapping a subscription like Netflix and replacing it with a monthly Direct Debit to charity. After watching this video, that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Perfect example of great writing, research and delivery. Amazing video, Damo - keep smashing it!
I did this and it’s very short term. It becomes just another line on a spreadsheet. To paraphrase, hedonic adjustment occurred and it didn’t help me. Selfish but there you go. I’ve adjusted and pick a new charity every few months, variance makes all the difference.
@@Yannerson I can't help but think that this such a sad way to view this. If you donate to charity with the sole intention of gaining something out of it, then of course it becomes just another line in a spreadsheet. You should donate to a cause you believe in and to make the world a better place, and sincerely believe that the world can become a better place if each person does something to improve it. You shouldn't donate to charity to be happy, it should be a secondary side effect. You should donate do charity because you sincerely want to do it, not to gain something out of it
@@talete7712 I agree whole heartedly. But I could choose for the transaction to mean something or potentially not do it at all. I’ve really enjoyed finding new causes to support that don’t necessarily gain main stream attention and I hope it helps them a little.
I watch this on a regular basis. It reminds me that when I make choices that I hope will make me happy and the world tells me that it won't.... Trust myself. Thank you. Truly, thank you.
When I bought my first car it was great. When I bought my 70 year old dad a car because I was doing OK in life it felt amazing, and it still does years later. Even watching this video and writing this comment reminded me of it. Thank you for paying a dividend Damien :-)
One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever been given when I was 21 was ‘You will only every be happy when you stop looking for it’. Strangely, for a 21yr old but I listened in the main and it is actually true.
Thanks very much as this is an eye opener. Lost my dad last year and he was not a rich man but enjoyed helping others and this gave him a real buzz. I do similar - I grow loads of veg and fruit and just charge my costs, this gives people value for money and I really enjoy the helping people out . Again thanks for the insight and I think you are generally right, Cheers Nick
I think I'm kinda immune to this. I only enjoy only a few things in life, but i never seem to get bored with them. For example, i bought my first car 5 years ago, an old honda, and i still love it as much as when i drove it the first time
Money can absolutely buy happiness. Skiing, the Alps, and lots of snow and snow makes me sooo happy, a special kind of happy, and I can't go without money.
When I had my first job I splashed out on new tech, new phones etc that was a total waste. I can’t go back in time but what I try and do now is think of money as not to be exchanged for things you want unless you really need a new device like a laptop for work and is absolutely needed. Instead I try and love more a frugal life style and try and use my money to make more money in higher rate interest accounts or invest in stocks like ETFs or invest the money into my own creative business pursuits like making my own films and doing marketing campaigns. I don’t have fancy clothes and new tech anymore but I do feel the mindset is helping me see what is necessary and getting more value out of what I currently have. I buy all my clothes second hand now and have so many that are practically unworn and given away. A lot of wasteful mindset
This is your best video yet. Well done mate, this was extremely good and I think it will really speak volume to a lot of your subscribers. Top notch content. Thanks for making this.
When I catch myself slipping back to that baseline happiness, I always just remind myself "remember when you wanted what you currently have?” It makes me appreciate that I got the thing I wanted, and recall how happy I was to get it.
SO much to unpack in this video - what a spectacular production! You just keep on giving Damien! Some truly important lessons here, backed by academic papers no less, presented in such an approachable and relatable way. There's no value that can be placed on content like this 🙂
You smashed it with this video Damo. I can’t imagine the hours of research and work that went it to this, but it’s worth it. I specifically loved the hedonic adaptation depiction of a couple weeks at an all inclusive in JA loool
I think the biggest problem right now, is people are either struggling to pay a mortgage and bills, or cant save enough to keep up with rising house prices, to just have a place to live. I'd love to spend my money on other things, but that option just isnt available to most anymore. I have a deposit bigger than what my parents 3 bed home cost 30 years ago, yet I cant afford a small freehold with a maxed mortgage. I have more money now than ever, and can afford to do/have less.
I'm quite happy when I give my 19 year old car a few upgrades I don't need to upgrade the entire thing, In 10 years time it could be worth more than something you buy new today . . . Some people struggle to be content.
I wonder how many peoples days you have made a little bit brighter just by them testing this out and engaging in the act of giving. Even if only a fifth of the people who watched do, that’s a good amount. Good work Damo 👍
i think another thing beyond experiences are hobbies, especially ones where you create things e.g music, woodworking, project car. a lot of jobs nowadays place you so far removed from seeing your work bring something to fruition (the most anyone sees are meaningless numbers go up), and that removes any kind of fulfilment from that. whittling down a stick into a knife is something where you see the direct result of your hard work, making the act of creating it a lot more fulfilling. you can also see yourself building on the skill; maybe a year or 2 later you can carve out a whole chest- these are things that are tangible to you, not the profits seen on a spreadsheet of a company you care little for
The ending was spot on, balance your saving, giving and spending on yourself, on a regular basis has to be good for you overall ... although achieving it isn't always easy!
This is something I need to do more of, spend too much time just putting money aside for the future, Mind im saving to move out, but i do think going away more, being able to celebrate what you've achieved and the small things in life, definitely will make things happier. Great video, great message, something i needed after the past couple weeks!
I've never really liked buying things or spending alot on big holidays alone. I've always preferred smaller more frequent events with friends which is why I make an effort to go out every week and just spend time with people
Great video! I've always chosen to invest in experiences and knowledge more than ''stuff''. Also, in the pursuit of happiness, people forget to count their blessings and appreciate what they have now.
This is a quote I heard all have all spent. All desires are lost. It means just because you see something does it mean you must have it. And if you have everything you have no desire left
Happiness is discipline, good habits that aren’t always pleasurable in the short term but make you better in the long term. Self-imposed restriction works. I just got back from working on a ship for 8 months. I used to hate driving, now I relish being able to move through the world and go anywhere I want. I used to hate cooking dinner, I just made my first meal in over half a year last night and it was insane being able to eat exactly what I want prepared exactly how I want. This satisfaction won’t last, I’ll adjust to life back on land in society and my expectations will change, but I will always remember this moment. Happiness is a perspective and a choice.
Came for the financial advice, and instead got insanely valuable life lessons. Amazing use of scienitific papers combined with memes and your signature personal energy to make this such a joy to watch!
As always a truly reflective view on life and happiness. I am on a similar journey and with a small mind shift looking at what you have and where you are is amazing. 4 years ago while happy and married with a home we didn't have a garden. Now while my grass is 90% moss it's my moss and I cut it lol. Looking at what you have changes how you look at want you want,do you really need it. We have down scaled our wants and of course this saves you money so it's a win win..... Thanks again and enjoy your journey too....
I remember when I tried to move to Vancouver from the UK, when I arrived they cancelled all the visas and I couldn’t work. So I turned it into a holiday, I was there with my brother and we went on a road trip and went to restaurants. We got drunk and I blew $200 on a steak. The money I completely don’t care about, I wouldn’t want it back because I got far more fun out of it. But it wasn’t the money that made it fun, it was being with my brother having fun and being free. Every time I look back on those memories I laugh and smile. One very funny memory was me and my brother were bickering over whether to stay at a hostel or a slightly more expensive motel. In the end, I caved in and agreed to go into a hostel. The irony was the hostel was cheaper but the car park across from it charged every 3 hours max so he had to get up every 3 hours to fill the meter. Meanwhile, I slept soundly. I just found that so funny because he was thought by going cheap he would save money but in the end staying there cost more than if we went to the motel. The next day, we stayed at a motel and for the slight extra expense it was a lot easier. I’m not saying more money means happier memories, what counts is the experience. Money is just a tool, an instrument, to get there but you don’t need much to have it. I spent more than would’ve been needed for me to have a good time. Our most joyful moments didn’t need money at all, we were just happy living in the moment
Appreciation can only bring happiness when there are things around you that you genuinely can reflect on and be appreciative for. This is just not the case when say a family member dies tragically, or a loved one leaves you or a natural disaster/war displaces you from your home. There’s no space for appreciation other than suffering, grief and depression. And these events can cause a lasting impact on your life for many, many years. It’s a privilege to be able to look back and see life progress in 12 months, and I’m saying this as someone who’s lived through bucketloads of trauma and is finally seeing improvements in my life.
I agree money doesn’t make you happy, but it certainly allows you options, which definitely lowers stress. When i was younger I didn’t have much money, i was probably as happy though as i had more friends and time. Now today I have a small business and so much more- it comes with its own stress but its not the same level of stress, its stress from good problems because i got so much more options. When i was 20 my option was spend money to eat or do anything else, and not eat. As for being happier, im not sure i am any happier but i do try to remember to count my blessings everyday.
Damn this is the second video I have watched from you now, having discovered this channel literally only 40mins ago and I am blown away by the quality of your content
Great choice content 2 things stick out / hit home for me 1. Planning travel ahead always lifts spirits 🎉 2. i'm a tight arse except travel 😂but when i do it does feel great . keep it coming Damo
@@DamienTalksMoney You are welcome. I couldn't agree more that when you get to a certain point in life, giving away your time or money is the key to happiness. By the way, how old is Cobweb?
@@DamienTalksMoney Way to go, we have a couple of rescue cats ourselves. I am in California but your points are valid no matter what part of the world you live in. I have tried to persuade friends and family that it is easier to reduce expenses rather than try and earn more money. I am semi-retired and couldn't be happier.
I'm like that rat ever since I subbed to your channel mate - I'm addicted to the anticipation of a new content made by you that I know will not disappoint
Your best video yet. Bam 100% spot on, never felt so connected than this one. I started buying some small trees each month and take them over the local nature reserve to plant with my son. I get so much pleasure out of doing this each month and watching our little patch grow. My son also looks forward to the end of each month when we get to do this that we get that hit when they turn up in the post for planting. That costs me £13 a month, far less than the £150 nice treat meal out that we might enjoy for a couple of hours!
I don't often comment on youtube but have to say this is one of the best videos I've watched on here in a very long time. I hope you're as happy as you deserve to be.
Hey Damien, love you channel. Doctor here, I remember doing some training on drugs and alcohol addiction some years back. My take home learning was that it takes 3 months for dopamine receptors in your brains to desensitise to an addiction, after that further time is required to recover and stay away. The first 3 months are therefore the hardest. Taking reels and short videos as an example on Instagram, they work by giving you 3-5 second dopamine hits, you keep scrolling and keep getting those hits. I think there's a lot of these dopamine hits that provide "fake" happiness in our daily lives. Therefore, other more important things like spending time with you family become sadly mundane and less enjoyable. This can be applied to spending , the new or better version of something you already have for example. It's a good foundation of to have, you know if you can stay away from something for 3 months (something that in the long term has negative impact) you've done incredibly well on your road to recovery - or put another way - you are buying into cheap short lived dopamine hits that take you away from what's more important in life. Keep up the good work.
You're a quality person Damien, well done. So much respect for your approach. Do whatever you feel is right with the money mate. What matters most is you feel the support the donations symbolize.
in the end your graph shows that even if you try or dont. Happiness is mostly the same level. But if you try to be happy. You will focus on unhappy times. So best way to be fulfilled is to fo hard stuff and gorw as person. Yeah it sucks to go for run every day. But it will make oyu proud and stronger.
Another absolute blinder of a video. I found myself thinking ‘I wonder if Martin Lewis started like this….?’ I hope someone with influence notices you soon and introduces you to an even wider audience. Your expertise, humour, media skills and what you have to say are all of enormous value.
at 57 I am saving, investing and working hard, this so easily becomes an obsession, I guess I am looking for some sort of security in this world and the ability to provide for children/grandchildren, but my main happiness comes through my eternal security in JESUS.
Love this ! I am training to be a counsellor and agree with everything you’ve said. I’ve always thought experiences mean far more than stuff and I have taken great joy helping others ❤ fantastic video
What an outstanding video Damien … one one the best I’ve ever seen on UA-cam … fantastic subject matter and coming from a genuine lad …. Time for me to book a £70 flight somewhere 😊
Great video Damien. I arrived here from your unfortunate video about the trauma you went through. This video is simply superb, very insightful and gives viewers so much to consider. I have now subscribed and wish I had found your channel sooner.
Wise words Damien thanks for the reminder- it’s sometimes too easy to forget that life is far more about experiences and having things to look forward to than just squirrelling money away - great job Damo!
How have I only just found this video of yours? This video is incredible and the content and way its portrayed is exceptional. A great video with a very important message and one of the best I've watched on UA-cam.
I really enjoyed this video Damien! I bought a house last year and I think for me it very much felt like the ‘what now…?’ Feeling was quite strong. This year I’ve committed do doing more but spending less, walking in the Peaks over waiting for the asos sale. Thank you for bringing to attention Hedonic adjustment, I’m really glad that my happiness is invested in experiences over stuff
Yes Harry! Love this comment mate thank you so much. Our editor on the podcast is based in devon! I do all the editing on this channel so this video is all me haha
Wow. Thanks for putting it together in the context of happiness. The things I took away were: - you adjust to things I.e. hedonic adjustment so be aware of that - add variations to existing things to keep experiencing joy - seek small experiences as well and book them with family/friends so you can enjoy time with them. Basically do things together. - good memories can also re-trigger the joy - comparing yourself or your items to others can rid you of joy so think of your experiences instead - give to charity but try to connect with people you are helping.
Excellent video, I've certainly taken some ideas away to think about. Amazing to think how much the Stoics got right two thousand years ago. Important point that you made is happiness isn't a destination, we have to work at it every day.
I think I'm the opposite of Jacko. I generally think that if my next achievement etc is half as good as my last one, I'm sorted😁 I'm a bit of a loner (wife does her stuff, kids pretty much grown up), but thanks to the fact that a couple of good Portuguese friends from my time over there are now living in the UK, I relish the occasional long weekend that they descend on my house, bearing traditional edibles and the beer and wine flows. It doesn't cost the earth, but the emotions are priceless. Giving and sharing is the route to happiness.
I'm a huge advocate for the benefits of climbing (with a friend or a partner). It can also be done very cheaply - bouldering with a £60 pair of shoes and £10 worth of chalk and a chalk bag (eBay is your friend here). It's one of the best sports/activities for improving you both physically and mentally, and when combined with a relationship, either friendship or romantic, it can make that stronger also. Money definitely can buy you happiness, but it can also buy you a pair of climbing shoes, and that's a fun and easy way to get to the same place.
Damien as a spokesmen for Big Air fryer, I have had my air fryer for just over a year and I still love it and is a genuine source of happiness with every wedge I make. All hail the drawer of wedges
Awesome video, thank you! I've always been told by people with both more and less money than me that more money won't make me happier. I always say "I'll tell you when it stops making me happier then". I think people just suck at using it to make themselves happier. Great advice on how to do so in this vid.
I think this is true. Whenever I need to feel better, I think back to my first night in my new house. I hated the wall paper, there was a lawnmower in the corner of my living room, my sofa was my parents old one that had been sat in the garage for almost 5 years because no one had bothered to take it to the tip, and my coffee table was the upturned cardboard box the steamer I had bought to take the wallpaper off the walls the next day came in. After a full day of unpacking, arranging the kitchen, back and forth to mum and dads collecting my things, I was totally exhausted and I just crashed back on the sofa with a beer. What came over me was the most unadulterated and perfect sensation of both pleasure and satisfaction I have ever felt in my entire life. Sure, this place had its faults and I was going to need to redecorate the whole thing from top to bottom, but it was mine! Whenever I think back to that moment almost 4 years ago now, the feeling comes right back.
Best video yet, and that's saying something. Full of brilliant takeaways that I and a lot of others needed to hear. It's nice to see the meme clips stitched in again. LOLed at the "satisfaction" dub.
What a tremendous and brave video. Your best. As a MH practitioner, I am looking at some of these elements in my working practice. Massive respect to you Sir.
Hi Damien, this maybe relevant or not, but there is a line from a James song from years ago that has stuck with me since then " If i Hadn't seen such riches i could live with being poor" we are all born into this, but some are able to move out of it. I was on this wheel for most of my working life, but now retired i realise that what i have is quite satisfactory and am trying to appreciate it. But is it not easy.
Check out the daily upside here!
bit.ly/3HeBdUp
In keeping with the theme of this video I will be donated the fee I get from them to ‘Sean’s place’ it’s a charity local to me that does great work.
My advice - I’m a very happy 58yr old who will retire soon: 1. Build a balanced life career + friends + hobbies + sports + interests + family + children + marriage 2. Appreciate the free things nature has given us - sea, woods, trails, wildlife, air, rain, wind, body, senses, colours, 3. Save for rainy days/retirement 4. Stay fit & in shape, 5. Always leave toxic work environments/people
I like your outlook, and hope you enjoy your retirement. Thanks for the good advice 🙏
Thanks for sharing this!
Props to you, i couldn’t retire at 58.
4 months in and having been really busy with moving house, helping my kids move houses, holiday etc am now twiddling me thumbs ! Only so much running, squash & biking I can do in a week. Ordered a couple more “retirement” books and putting feelers out for p/t work 🫨
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You should be so unbelievably proud of this video. Content, production, message. Thank you for putting this into the world.
Thank you so much Grant. Lovely comment and i am glad you enjoyed the video
Could not agree more
Absolutely. I was going to comment something similar but this says it perfectly. Bloody brilliant. 👏
I would say same, this is a great review on happiness! So glad i clicked and watched. I relate to this because someone wanted to borrow money from me and I worried and contemplated for few nights coz its just so dear, and today God said I should be using every bit of opportunity to do charity and love, and so I said yes even if I’m uncertain. I have saved the money and it’s just in the bank, but that moment where the receiver just felt so relieved and thankful that I could be an instrument for them to alleviate their frustration and problems made me realize that I am lucky in so many ways and that made me happy, that moment you mentioned that the act of giving (time or resource) is a key to happiness - it’s weird but it works. Gave me a sense of purpose for a moment. Sorry for this litany and I could go on and on. Lol. But Thank you for caring about happiness and creating this content! 😊
Absolutely!
This video is so true. One thing I also recommend is learning to low-level enjoy the things you do every day like breakfast, shower, going to the loo, walking the dog, driving the car etc.
@ Hali88
Analyse this comment Guy’s, it speaks volumes
Thank you
This was such a good video with real practical advice as well as the more philosophical side of things. As a Muslim, charity is a huge part of my faith. In Islam, if you can't afford to give money away you're encouraged to view looking after your family as charity e.g feeding your loved ones. Even smiling at another person is classed as an act of charity. It doesn't cost anything to be kind!
Smiling at someone is charity! What a lovely sentiment and way to go about the world that is
thats become a big issue. the selfishness of 'family over community'
@@PazLeBonno it isn’t.
@@PazLeBon take off your pink glasses
Working as a care assistant has made me value the ability to walk around without needing assistance which seems so simple but it really is something to appreciate if you have that ability.
Thank you for the work you do 💕
Few years ago I had a horrible accident and spent a lot of time in the hospital. The only thing that helped me not to sink into a big black hole of misery was my loved ones and photos on my phone from all the wonderful times and experiences I had over the years. I’m glad I was always interested in this topic and really researched things like happiness, old age regrets etc very early in life. I think it really helped me not to put my attention in the wrong places. Became minimalist in my early 20, prioritized giving and making memories.
Caring for my belongings helps too. If I’m tired of my car, I do a full detail on it. It helps. I only care for things in that way because I value them.
Yes, I think money can buy happiness, because more money reduces the financial stress, improves the living standards and access to better healthcare.
I remember all too well when I was a student, I had a tooth that grew sideways and started to rot, but I had no money to get it removed.
For over a year I was dealing with the constant pain of that tooth slowly rotting away.
I didn't sleep well and got underweight by losing over 20 pounds because eating was painful.
When I finally had the money to get it out, it was such a relief; even when I think of it now, I remember how nice that was.
Finally almost no pain and being able to sleep much better.
However, while that was about 10 years ago, I still have pain in the jaw from time to time, because a nerve was permanently damaged as well.
I definitely learned a lot of it, most importantly that money actually does buy happiness and that people don't give a crap about suffering of others.
My IVF daughter, the best 20k ever spent, by anyone, anywhere, ever ❤
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Love that 🩷
Why didnt you go the ‘natural way’ i.e. getting cream pie? Thanks
This video is S tier. It’s the kind of life advice people used to get in Church. You are truly doing the Lord’s work. Bless you my son.
Thank you
Still do.. that’s why I’m happy 😊
@@MrJoeSomebody which Church? I’m coming.
I tend to realise in retrospect that I've been happy, but am often too wrapped up in things to notice at the time. Having a strong sense of purpose seems to be a key element.
It's worth noting, in a time when giving money may feel challenging for many, that giving time can be every bit as rewarding. I started volunteering at a repair cafe and it's been so satisfying, I've met wonderful people who have become friends and the sense of joy I feel when we fix a visitors treasured item is lasting and satisfying. Use your skills to help others and be kind, I promise you will be rewarded for it.
This is a great point. Volunteering benefits everyone.
I really appreciate how you don't cut at the end of sentence and just monologue. The pauses instead of the cuts makes it feel more genuine and not just another produced video
In terms of consumerism though, I buy things through the lense of "is it useful, will it help me" so I might spend £500 on headphones, or £200 on hiking boots, but its not out of impulse, and they serve a person. Mindless consumerism to keep up with the Jones' is what you want to avoid. Consuming quality products that add value to your life is a useful endeavour, and also a byproducts of a consumerist society, we can't demonise everything.
I've always gotten crap for focusing so much on the past, but where I am now I feel like my tendency to think about my past every single day is a blessing to my happiness. I have PTSD, and get stuck thinking about the traumas of my past and how horrific and miserable it was. But when I come back to reality, I look at my big house and my happy relationship and my disability support and how hard I've worked and how far I've come to build this peaceful life for myself after growing up miserable, and every day my appreciation for what I have is refreshed. I grew up impoverished and am now middle class, and that increase in income drastically improved my happiness, but since I'm often comparing it to where I started it doesn't really get old.
Smart 😊
As a Christian that doesn't come as a surprise. In our local congregation we help each other - sometimes just buying food for each other if someone is in a rough spot. Seeing the difference in that persons day makes all the difference. Giving makes happier than receiving. And if we do, it's likely going to be reciprocated when you yourself are struggling.
Same
I recently entered the legal profession in family law, and my job has made me so thankful for my husband and little family we have made. So thankful for the peace we have, even if materially we don’t have much. I’ve already seen and heard horrific stories that leave me on the verge of tears. It baffles me how truly priceless kindness can be and yet it seems to be lacking throughout too many people.
It wasn't until I had a disk hernia that needed spinal surgery and almost cost me the ability to walk that I truly became grateful and happy just to be able to walk and move freely each day. Really interesting ideas in this video, thanks.
"Rich people tell you money can't buy happiness, so you remain poor in your delusion", that's what my mentor told me.
Your mentor is right.
Money can’t buy happiness but not having enough of it buys misery for sure.
Your mentor was a fool and so are you.
Oh, yet another useless quote about wealth
Most people who you hear in media are rather rich. So for them, it doesn't buy happiness, as they have too much of it. IMHO one of the reasons why extremely rich are prone to suicide is the fact they don't have to interact with other people the normal way and create social connections as they can buy almost all they want. When I need the bus driver to stop for me somewhere he doesn't have to, I have to be nice to him and so on. People are social animals.
I've been thinking about swapping a subscription like Netflix and replacing it with a monthly Direct Debit to charity. After watching this video, that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Perfect example of great writing, research and delivery. Amazing video, Damo - keep smashing it!
This sounds like an awesome idea!
I'd be careful donating to big corporate charities. I've seen first hand the sheer waste within them. Go small and local if you're going to donate.
I did this and it’s very short term. It becomes just another line on a spreadsheet. To paraphrase, hedonic adjustment occurred and it didn’t help me. Selfish but there you go. I’ve adjusted and pick a new charity every few months, variance makes all the difference.
@@Yannerson I can't help but think that this such a sad way to view this. If you donate to charity with the sole intention of gaining something out of it, then of course it becomes just another line in a spreadsheet. You should donate to a cause you believe in and to make the world a better place, and sincerely believe that the world can become a better place if each person does something to improve it. You shouldn't donate to charity to be happy, it should be a secondary side effect. You should donate do charity because you sincerely want to do it, not to gain something out of it
@@talete7712 I agree whole heartedly. But I could choose for the transaction to mean something or potentially not do it at all. I’ve really enjoyed finding new causes to support that don’t necessarily gain main stream attention and I hope it helps them a little.
I watch this on a regular basis. It reminds me that when I make choices that I hope will make me happy and the world tells me that it won't.... Trust myself. Thank you. Truly, thank you.
One of my favourite sayings is that, money can’t buy you happiness but I’d rather cry in a Ferrari. Superb video Damo
Haha great saying
When I bought my first car it was great. When I bought my 70 year old dad a car because I was doing OK in life it felt amazing, and it still does years later. Even watching this video and writing this comment reminded me of it. Thank you for paying a dividend Damien :-)
One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever been given when I was 21 was ‘You will only every be happy when you stop looking for it’.
Strangely, for a 21yr old but I listened in the main and it is actually true.
Thanks very much as this is an eye opener. Lost my dad last year and he was not a rich man but enjoyed helping others and this gave him a real buzz. I do similar - I grow loads of veg and fruit and just charge my costs, this gives people value for money and I really enjoy the helping people out . Again thanks for the insight and I think you are generally right, Cheers Nick
I think I'm kinda immune to this. I only enjoy only a few things in life, but i never seem to get bored with them. For example, i bought my first car 5 years ago, an old honda, and i still love it as much as when i drove it the first time
I work in a Foodbank and get far more from giving than receiving, one of the best videos on UA-cam,thank you .
Beautifully nuanced video here Damo, an absolute pleasure to watch. Thanks for taking the time to put this together xx
Money can absolutely buy happiness. Skiing, the Alps, and lots of snow and snow makes me sooo happy, a special kind of happy, and I can't go without money.
When I had my first job I splashed out on new tech, new phones etc that was a total waste. I can’t go back in time but what I try and do now is think of money as not to be exchanged for things you want unless you really need a new device like a laptop for work and is absolutely needed. Instead I try and love more a frugal life style and try and use my money to make more money in higher rate interest accounts or invest in stocks like ETFs or invest the money into my own creative business pursuits like making my own films and doing marketing campaigns. I don’t have fancy clothes and new tech anymore but I do feel the mindset is helping me see what is necessary and getting more value out of what I currently have. I buy all my clothes second hand now and have so many that are practically unworn and given away. A lot of wasteful mindset
This is your best video yet. Well done mate, this was extremely good and I think it will really speak volume to a lot of your subscribers. Top notch content. Thanks for making this.
When I catch myself slipping back to that baseline happiness, I always just remind myself "remember when you wanted what you currently have?” It makes me appreciate that I got the thing I wanted, and recall how happy I was to get it.
SO much to unpack in this video - what a spectacular production! You just keep on giving Damien! Some truly important lessons here, backed by academic papers no less, presented in such an approachable and relatable way. There's no value that can be placed on content like this 🙂
You smashed it with this video Damo. I can’t imagine the hours of research and work that went it to this, but it’s worth it. I specifically loved the hedonic adaptation depiction of a couple weeks at an all inclusive in JA loool
Yes! Haha I couldn’t stop laughing at that clip 🤣
I think the biggest problem right now, is people are either struggling to pay a mortgage and bills, or cant save enough to keep up with rising house prices, to just have a place to live.
I'd love to spend my money on other things, but that option just isnt available to most anymore. I have a deposit bigger than what my parents 3 bed home cost 30 years ago, yet I cant afford a small freehold with a maxed mortgage.
I have more money now than ever, and can afford to do/have less.
This comment will be probably get lost, but can I just say this sort of content is absolutely amazing? I've rewatched it more than 5 times.Thank you!
Not lost at all! Thank you so much for watching the video
I'm quite happy when I give my 19 year old car a few upgrades I don't need to upgrade the entire thing,
In 10 years time it could be worth more than something you buy new today . . .
Some people struggle to be content.
I wonder how many peoples days you have made a little bit brighter just by them testing this out and engaging in the act of giving. Even if only a fifth of the people who watched do, that’s a good amount.
Good work Damo 👍
i think another thing beyond experiences are hobbies, especially ones where you create things e.g music, woodworking, project car. a lot of jobs nowadays place you so far removed from seeing your work bring something to fruition (the most anyone sees are meaningless numbers go up), and that removes any kind of fulfilment from that. whittling down a stick into a knife is something where you see the direct result of your hard work, making the act of creating it a lot more fulfilling. you can also see yourself building on the skill; maybe a year or 2 later you can carve out a whole chest- these are things that are tangible to you, not the profits seen on a spreadsheet of a company you care little for
The ending was spot on, balance your saving, giving and spending on yourself, on a regular basis has to be good for you overall ... although achieving it isn't always easy!
This is something I need to do more of, spend too much time just putting money aside for the future, Mind im saving to move out, but i do think going away more, being able to celebrate what you've achieved and the small things in life, definitely will make things happier.
Great video, great message, something i needed after the past couple weeks!
2:29 Another thing I love about your channel are all the little musical references. It's a millennial music mystery tour.
Yes! Glad you enjoy them I had some fun with this one haha. Risked getting strikes just to get the references in
Money can't buy happines, but it does buy a facsimile which is indistinguishable from the real thing, cheers!!
I've never really liked buying things or spending alot on big holidays alone. I've always preferred smaller more frequent events with friends which is why I make an effort to go out every week and just spend time with people
Great video! I've always chosen to invest in experiences and knowledge more than ''stuff''. Also, in the pursuit of happiness, people forget to count their blessings and appreciate what they have now.
This is a quote I heard all have all spent. All desires are lost. It means just because you see something does it mean you must have it. And if you have everything you have no desire left
Happiness is discipline, good habits that aren’t always pleasurable in the short term but make you better in the long term. Self-imposed restriction works. I just got back from working on a ship for 8 months. I used to hate driving, now I relish being able to move through the world and go anywhere I want. I used to hate cooking dinner, I just made my first meal in over half a year last night and it was insane being able to eat exactly what I want prepared exactly how I want. This satisfaction won’t last, I’ll adjust to life back on land in society and my expectations will change, but I will always remember this moment. Happiness is a perspective and a choice.
Man your writing is astounding. Every video ends on such a banger.
You legend thank you! Not all of them end on bangers.. I need to make sure they do going forwards
I love how he gave up on stoping the copyright and just gave in at the end very inspiring
Came for the financial advice, and instead got insanely valuable life lessons. Amazing use of scienitific papers combined with memes and your signature personal energy to make this such a joy to watch!
As always a truly reflective view on life and happiness. I am on a similar journey and with a small mind shift looking at what you have and where you are is amazing. 4 years ago while happy and married with a home we didn't have a garden. Now while my grass is 90% moss it's my moss and I cut it lol. Looking at what you have changes how you look at want you want,do you really need it. We have down scaled our wants and of course this saves you money so it's a win win..... Thanks again and enjoy your journey too....
I remember when I tried to move to Vancouver from the UK, when I arrived they cancelled all the visas and I couldn’t work. So I turned it into a holiday, I was there with my brother and we went on a road trip and went to restaurants. We got drunk and I blew $200 on a steak.
The money I completely don’t care about, I wouldn’t want it back because I got far more fun out of it. But it wasn’t the money that made it fun, it was being with my brother having fun and being free. Every time I look back on those memories I laugh and smile.
One very funny memory was me and my brother were bickering over whether to stay at a hostel or a slightly more expensive motel.
In the end, I caved in and agreed to go into a hostel. The irony was the hostel was cheaper but the car park across from it charged every 3 hours max so he had to get up every 3 hours to fill the meter. Meanwhile, I slept soundly. I just found that so funny because he was thought by going cheap he would save money but in the end staying there cost more than if we went to the motel. The next day, we stayed at a motel and for the slight extra expense it was a lot easier.
I’m not saying more money means happier memories, what counts is the experience. Money is just a tool, an instrument, to get there but you don’t need much to have it. I spent more than would’ve been needed for me to have a good time. Our most joyful moments didn’t need money at all, we were just happy living in the moment
Appreciation can only bring happiness when there are things around you that you genuinely can reflect on and be appreciative for. This is just not the case when say a family member dies tragically, or a loved one leaves you or a natural disaster/war displaces you from your home. There’s no space for appreciation other than suffering, grief and depression. And these events can cause a lasting impact on your life for many, many years.
It’s a privilege to be able to look back and see life progress in 12 months, and I’m saying this as someone who’s lived through bucketloads of trauma and is finally seeing improvements in my life.
I agree money doesn’t make you happy, but it certainly allows you options, which definitely lowers stress. When i was younger I didn’t have much money, i was probably as happy though as i had more friends and time. Now today I have a small business and so much more- it comes with its own stress but its not the same level of stress, its stress from good problems because i got so much more options. When i was 20 my option was spend money to eat or do anything else, and not eat. As for being happier, im not sure i am any happier but i do try to remember to count my blessings everyday.
Damn this is the second video I have watched from you now, having discovered this channel literally only 40mins ago and I am blown away by the quality of your content
Great choice content 2 things stick out / hit home for me
1. Planning travel ahead always lifts spirits 🎉
2. i'm a tight arse except travel 😂but when i do it does feel great .
keep it coming Damo
This resonates with me so much. Thank you for wonderful video backed up with serious university work!
Thank you so much! I really appreciate this so much and i am glad the video helped you.
I am really enjoying your channel. This is for my next dopamine hit! Keep up the great work.
WOW! Thank you so much for the Kelly. I don't know what to say!
@@DamienTalksMoney You are welcome. I couldn't agree more that when you get to a certain point in life, giving away your time or money is the key to happiness. By the way, how old is Cobweb?
@@SocalNewsOne We think he is 6/7. But he is a rescue so we can't be really sure. He had a very rough start also so is often poorly!
@@DamienTalksMoney Way to go, we have a couple of rescue cats ourselves. I am in California but your points are valid no matter what part of the world you live in. I have tried to persuade friends and family that it is easier to reduce expenses rather than try and earn more money. I am semi-retired and couldn't be happier.
I'm like that rat ever since I subbed to your channel mate - I'm addicted to the anticipation of a new content made by you that I know will not disappoint
This is a brilliant comment!
Love the fact that you're citing papers, it increases your credibility. Thanks for the great video!
I see what you did there with the cat on screen during the ad read. Must be the only ad I haven’t skipped. 😂
🤣🤣🤣
Your best video yet. Bam 100% spot on, never felt so connected than this one. I started buying some small trees each month and take them over the local nature reserve to plant with my son. I get so much pleasure out of doing this each month and watching our little patch grow. My son also looks forward to the end of each month when we get to do this that we get that hit when they turn up in the post for planting. That costs me £13 a month, far less than the £150 nice treat meal out that we might enjoy for a couple of hours!
I don't often comment on youtube but have to say this is one of the best videos I've watched on here in a very long time. I hope you're as happy as you deserve to be.
Hey Damien, love you channel. Doctor here, I remember doing some training on drugs and alcohol addiction some years back. My take home learning was that it takes 3 months for dopamine receptors in your brains to desensitise to an addiction, after that further time is required to recover and stay away. The first 3 months are therefore the hardest.
Taking reels and short videos as an example on Instagram, they work by giving you 3-5 second dopamine hits, you keep scrolling and keep getting those hits. I think there's a lot of these dopamine hits that provide "fake" happiness in our daily lives. Therefore, other more important things like spending time with you family become sadly mundane and less enjoyable. This can be applied to spending , the new or better version of something you already have for example.
It's a good foundation of to have, you know if you can stay away from something for 3 months (something that in the long term has negative impact) you've done incredibly well on your road to recovery - or put another way - you are buying into cheap short lived dopamine hits that take you away from what's more important in life.
Keep up the good work.
You're a quality person Damien, well done. So much respect for your approach. Do whatever you feel is right with the money mate. What matters most is you feel the support the donations symbolize.
Mate I feel it in spades. I am blown away by it and so honoured
in the end your graph shows that even if you try or dont. Happiness is mostly the same level. But if you try to be happy. You will focus on unhappy times.
So best way to be fulfilled is to fo hard stuff and gorw as person. Yeah it sucks to go for run every day. But it will make oyu proud and stronger.
Another absolute blinder of a video. I found myself thinking ‘I wonder if Martin Lewis started like this….?’ I hope someone with influence notices you soon and introduces you to an even wider audience. Your expertise, humour, media skills and what you have to say are all of enormous value.
Thank you so much! Lovely comment this. I hope someone notices me to haha!
What a brilliant video. Thank you! My own experience as I’ve earned more is that sharing it or giving money to others / charities helps them and me.
Glad you enjoyed it!
at 57 I am saving, investing and working hard, this so easily becomes an obsession, I guess I am looking for some sort of security in this world and the ability to provide for children/grandchildren, but my main happiness comes through my eternal security in JESUS.
Love this ! I am training to be a counsellor and agree with everything you’ve said. I’ve always thought experiences mean far more than stuff and I have taken great joy helping others ❤ fantastic video
What an outstanding video Damien … one one the best I’ve ever seen on UA-cam … fantastic subject matter and coming from a genuine lad …. Time for me to book a £70 flight somewhere 😊
Great video Damien. I arrived here from your unfortunate video about the trauma you went through. This video is simply superb, very insightful and gives viewers so much to consider. I have now subscribed and wish I had found your channel sooner.
Wise words Damien thanks for the reminder- it’s sometimes too easy to forget that life is far more about experiences and having things to look forward to than just squirrelling money away - great job Damo!
How have I only just found this video of yours? This video is incredible and the content and way its portrayed is exceptional. A great video with a very important message and one of the best I've watched on UA-cam.
I really enjoyed this video Damien! I bought a house last year and I think for me it very much felt like the ‘what now…?’ Feeling was quite strong. This year I’ve committed do doing more but spending less, walking in the Peaks over waiting for the asos sale. Thank you for bringing to attention Hedonic adjustment, I’m really glad that my happiness is invested in experiences over stuff
I’m constantly striving for the next job, pay rise or bonus. Very enlightening.
This video hit different. 10/10 A* top of the class, sir.
I missed this one when it first came out but I am still glad I have watched it now. Your communicating skills are awesome. Thank youx
This is next level mate. Favourite UA-cam channel. Podcast listener too. Thank you from Devon
Yes Harry! Love this comment mate thank you so much. Our editor on the podcast is based in devon! I do all the editing on this channel so this video is all me haha
Wow. Thanks for putting it together in the context of happiness. The things I took away were:
- you adjust to things I.e. hedonic adjustment so be aware of that
- add variations to existing things to keep experiencing joy
- seek small experiences as well and book them with family/friends so you can enjoy time with them. Basically do things together.
- good memories can also re-trigger the joy
- comparing yourself or your items to others can rid you of joy so think of your experiences instead
- give to charity but try to connect with people you are helping.
Excellent takeaways and a lovely summary of the video for others to read thank you.
Your videos are always so well made and really thought provoking, love what you’re doing on this channel!
I watched half the Huberman Lab episodes and I never succeded in getting a clear picture of the reward prediction error idea before today. Kudos!
Excellent video, I've certainly taken some ideas away to think about.
Amazing to think how much the Stoics got right two thousand years ago. Important point that you made is happiness isn't a destination, we have to work at it every day.
Great video. Stuff doesn't make you happy. Been saying this for years. Spend your money on making memories.
I think I'm the opposite of Jacko. I generally think that if my next achievement etc is half as good as my last one, I'm sorted😁 I'm a bit of a loner (wife does her stuff, kids pretty much grown up), but thanks to the fact that a couple of good Portuguese friends from my time over there are now living in the UK, I relish the occasional long weekend that they descend on my house, bearing traditional edibles and the beer and wine flows. It doesn't cost the earth, but the emotions are priceless. Giving and sharing is the route to happiness.
HAHA! Brilliant.
has made me feel a whole lot more positive on this Monday morning, we really dont appreciate what we have!
Have a great week Simon!
I'm a huge advocate for the benefits of climbing (with a friend or a partner). It can also be done very cheaply - bouldering with a £60 pair of shoes and £10 worth of chalk and a chalk bag (eBay is your friend here).
It's one of the best sports/activities for improving you both physically and mentally, and when combined with a relationship, either friendship or romantic, it can make that stronger also.
Money definitely can buy you happiness, but it can also buy you a pair of climbing shoes, and that's a fun and easy way to get to the same place.
Damien as a spokesmen for Big Air fryer, I have had my air fryer for just over a year and I still love it and is a genuine source of happiness with every wedge I make.
All hail the drawer of wedges
New to your channel, but wanted to say this was excellent, well crafted, and authentically delivered. Kudos.
Thank you! Also welcome to the channel
Mate, why don't you have more subs! Your delivery and content is great. Good editing too!
Brilliant - give your time helping young people, it will make you happy, guaranteed 👍
Another great video. One of the things that really changed my happiness levels, was learning to stop procrastinating
TEACH ME HOW!!!! I procrastinate so much.
@@DamienTalksMoney Insight Timer App it is Free, Let Go Of Procastination by Kenneth Soares I think he is also on UA-cam so might be on here too
I get way sadder when I think back in nostalgia, just want to go back to those times. In no way do I feel better
Awesome video, thank you! I've always been told by people with both more and less money than me that more money won't make me happier. I always say "I'll tell you when it stops making me happier then".
I think people just suck at using it to make themselves happier. Great advice on how to do so in this vid.
I think this is true. Whenever I need to feel better, I think back to my first night in my new house.
I hated the wall paper, there was a lawnmower in the corner of my living room, my sofa was my parents old one that had been sat in the garage for almost 5 years because no one had bothered to take it to the tip, and my coffee table was the upturned cardboard box the steamer I had bought to take the wallpaper off the walls the next day came in.
After a full day of unpacking, arranging the kitchen, back and forth to mum and dads collecting my things, I was totally exhausted and I just crashed back on the sofa with a beer.
What came over me was the most unadulterated and perfect sensation of both pleasure and satisfaction I have ever felt in my entire life. Sure, this place had its faults and I was going to need to redecorate the whole thing from top to bottom, but it was mine!
Whenever I think back to that moment almost 4 years ago now, the feeling comes right back.
Best video yet, and that's saying something. Full of brilliant takeaways that I and a lot of others needed to hear. It's nice to see the meme clips stitched in again. LOLed at the "satisfaction" dub.
Quality! The evidence based nature of your videos is refreshing to see
Thank you Thomas! There is so much interesting research out there it surprises me lots of people don't use it
What a tremendous and brave video. Your best. As a MH practitioner, I am looking at some of these elements in my working practice. Massive respect to you Sir.
Thank you!
Hi Damien, this maybe relevant or not, but there is a line from a James song from years ago that has stuck with me since then " If i Hadn't seen such riches i could live with being poor"
we are all born into this, but some are able to move out of it. I was on this wheel for most of my working life, but now retired i realise that what i have is quite satisfactory and am trying to appreciate it. But is it not easy.