How Can You Tell A Nob from A Yob? | QI

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  • Опубліковано 26 вер 2024
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    This clip is from QI Series N, Episode 4, 'Noble Rot' with Sandi Toksvig, Alan Davies, Jeremy Clarkson, Jason Manford and Sara Pascoe.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 142

  • @ct2136
    @ct2136 3 місяці тому +42

    Once again Alan nails the human experience

  • @weatherwitchandfelinefamiliars
    @weatherwitchandfelinefamiliars 3 місяці тому +11

    I can't believe that lady went back into the stall upon seeing Sandi 😂😂😂

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke 3 місяці тому +42

    I sort of lean over to one side and then reach round back, no standing up or going down the front for me, so, there's a third option, if one were ever needed... :P

    • @titanic1800
      @titanic1800 3 місяці тому +6

      I second this!

    • @alimanski7941
      @alimanski7941 3 місяці тому +4

      Same!

    • @the_pi_th_horseman
      @the_pi_th_horseman 3 місяці тому +11

      I think that is they way nearly every sit-wiper does it. The going through the front thing, as near as I can tell, was invented by stand-wipe weirdos.

    • @andrybak
      @andrybak 3 місяці тому +2

      When Jason Manford says "reach in", he means reach round back.

    • @twocvbloke
      @twocvbloke 3 місяці тому +6

      @@andrybak Oh he definitely meant reaching in as in between the legs, risking a mudslide over one's lower parts....... :S

  • @gussnarp
    @gussnarp 3 місяці тому +60

    I found out about the other half of wipers because I married one.

    • @kurtisburtis
      @kurtisburtis 3 місяці тому

      Same

    • @michaelharrison3602
      @michaelharrison3602 3 місяці тому +1

      I think it's mostly women who wip from back to front between their legs men reach behind and wipe backwards 😅 don't know if there's a "proper"way😅

    • @kirotheavenger60
      @kirotheavenger60 3 місяці тому +5

      ​@@michaelharrison3602apparently women particularly should be wiping front to back, as it reduces infections in front

    • @20shourya
      @20shourya 3 місяці тому

      just because you married one doesn't fully explain why you found out.

    • @kurtisburtis
      @kurtisburtis 3 місяці тому

      @@20shourya
      Sometimes couples get comfortable and stop bothering to close doors.

  • @howlinhobbit
    @howlinhobbit 3 місяці тому +38

    the problem with wiping forwards (if you’re female) is you’re introducing a wonderful yeast infection medium. I learned this from childbirth classes if your baby is a girl.

    • @Tao_Tology
      @Tao_Tology 3 місяці тому +12

      So you could always stay seated and wipe backwards/away, non?

    • @OriginalPiMan
      @OriginalPiMan 3 місяці тому +18

      Whether you wipe sitting or standing, always wipe crack to back.

    • @angrytedtalks
      @angrytedtalks 3 місяці тому +1

      ​@@Tao_Tologyif you are seated, you can't possibly be cleaning your arse. Stand up and don't be gross.

    • @Tao_Tology
      @Tao_Tology 3 місяці тому +7

      @@angrytedtalks Nonsense.
      If you are standing then your bum cheeks are together (rather than apart when you are sitting).
      It is _literally_ more difficult to wipe when standing, (plus any tp you use will be being pressed/squeezed against your bum cheeks on the way out. 🤢 )

    • @smoothrocky1847
      @smoothrocky1847 3 місяці тому +2

      @@Tao_Tology- Try not to imagine the standing folk’s likely skid marks and lingering odour; they’re one wedgie away from being a bio-hazard.

  • @martingallagher1780
    @martingallagher1780 3 місяці тому +28

    I'm still waiting to find out how to tell a Nob from a Yob.

    • @EebstertheGreat
      @EebstertheGreat 3 місяці тому +11

      You can check out "U and non-U" online. It was a somewhat contentious claim that at any rate doesn't really apply anymore. But the premise was that many middle-class English people consciously adopted a purportedly "posher" style of speech, substituting words that sounded fancy or French like "serviette" for napkin or "toilet" for loo. Meanwhile, the upper-class English felt secure in their station and had no reason to put on airs and thus kept speaking the way they always had. So you could tell someone was middle-class if they sounded like they were trying to act upper-class.
      This was only relevant for a brief period when RP was still respected. Since the late 1960s, nobody has respected RP, so nobody tries to imitate it anymore.

    • @richardpj847
      @richardpj847 3 місяці тому +3

      Words from French are used by the upper class, words from Germanic are working class - for instance Rendevous (French) vs Meeting (from moot, Germanic).
      Mostly due to the large influx of French Nobs in 1066.
      Not so relevant now.

    • @angrytedtalks
      @angrytedtalks 3 місяці тому +3

      "You, Sir, are a yob."
      "Oo be a nob."
      You, non you.

    • @baerlauchstal
      @baerlauchstal 3 місяці тому +1

      @@richardpj847 Maybe so, but in modern times, it was completely the other way round, as EebstertheGreat (if indeed that is their name) points out. Frenchified words (serviette, perfume, mirror) were used, during the period of RP's ascendancy, by middle-class wannabes, while the toffs had their napkins, scents and looking-glasses. Some of those observations went out of date very quickly (mirror won over looking-glass pretty much completely); others lasted longer; some are still around to some extent.
      And I mean, nobody has ever said "rendezvous" to mean "meeting", surely. A rendezvous is a specific *kind* of meeting: one where people (usually two people) gather at a pre-arranged time and place, usually in neither party's premises. It has connotations of secrecy, or sexual dalliance, or both. No toff has ever said "Must be orff, old boy, I'm late for a rendezvous with m'steward." The posh word for "meeting" is "meeting".

    • @gyroscope915
      @gyroscope915 3 місяці тому +2

      The language you use is how you tell. They say that

  • @wordreet
    @wordreet 3 місяці тому +29

    🤦 At least she could have waited for you to emerge before the greeting!!!!!!

    • @JJONNYREPP
      @JJONNYREPP 3 місяці тому

      How Can You Tell A Nob from A Yob? | QI 1854pm 12.6.24 i am a nob verging on being a yob. a new pasture for me.... yobism. all due to lack of a decent pub, water supply or social scene.... Scandinavians have great complexions... can i seriously ask - what is this obsession with crap and toilet habits with you people? bog roll? dunno.... doesn't seem like too heavy a word to use... unless yer of the bog = god kultur...

  • @Magmafrost13
    @Magmafrost13 3 місяці тому +4

    Its kinda weird that they'd bring Clarkson back on after... everything. Not that he isnt funny but dude's a nutjob and not in a fun way.

  • @felisd
    @felisd 3 місяці тому +2

    That last story. Oh lord, if I'd burst in on someone and then cottoned on that it's Sandy Toksvig, I would have run away in mortification.

  • @Nick.Martin.
    @Nick.Martin. 3 місяці тому +4

    What do you call a posh bouncer?
    A door knob.

  • @sstills951
    @sstills951 3 місяці тому +13

    Some people really should take wiping classes.

    • @Phil_Cleaver
      @Phil_Cleaver 3 місяці тому

      Have you not done a UA-cam search for the instructive videos?

    • @sstills951
      @sstills951 3 місяці тому

      @@Phil_Cleaver not me Cleaver, come on man. I already took my classes.

  • @youremakingprogress144
    @youremakingprogress144 3 місяці тому +4

    I certainly had not known about how the other half lives.

  • @redelfshotthefood8213
    @redelfshotthefood8213 3 місяці тому +1

    It's more complicated that stand or sit. There is also wipe front to back or back to front, or ... Circular. 🇨🇦

  • @Snaakie83
    @Snaakie83 3 місяці тому +27

    Mate of mine was on a porter loo as high as a kite on XTC...he thought he heared his phone falling into the shithole and after some internal deliberation he decided to go arms deep into the shit to stir for his phone.
    Thats when someone called him and he heared his phone in his pocket.
    Sobered up quite quickly after that. 😂

    • @GneasYTC
      @GneasYTC 3 місяці тому

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @keevahusky
      @keevahusky 3 місяці тому +2

      heared ......

    • @simontay4851
      @simontay4851 3 місяці тому

      NASTY!

    • @peterclarke7006
      @peterclarke7006 3 місяці тому +5

      Please tell me he answered it with his other hand and said something along the lines of "hi, yeah, look, I can't talk. I've dropped my phone down the khazi and I need to find it... What do you mean 'how am I talking to you?'"

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому

      I was going to say that there's no 'arm in it.
      But then I realised he did have his 'arm in it.

  • @OriginalGriff
    @OriginalGriff 3 місяці тому +4

    There are also the "folders" vs the "scrunchers" ...
    I guess nobody actually teaches you what to do (or if the do I don't remember it) so you come up with a system that works for you and assume everybody else came to the same conclusions.

    • @Ewas77
      @Ewas77 3 місяці тому

      yes!

    • @krashd
      @krashd 2 місяці тому

      Surely scrunching is only effective for women wiping their weewee hole? Since scrunching would be incredibly ineffective for arse work.

    • @just-tess
      @just-tess Місяць тому

      I guess I fall somewhere in the middle on that too? and I clearly remember my mom instructing me never to wipe back to front, horrifying to think any female bodied adult would do that

  • @bigredsock1
    @bigredsock1 3 місяці тому +2

    Watched to the end to hear Sandi explain that you referred to a napkin if you were U and a serviette if you were non-U, but it instead became a discussion about wiping your bum!

  • @AdityaMehendale
    @AdityaMehendale 3 місяці тому +11

    "You're Sandi Toksvig" --> so why no full-length QI-videos anymore? :(

    • @Tenebrio_molitor1
      @Tenebrio_molitor1 3 місяці тому +2

      A lot of the older episodes are floating around but the newer series like U are locked behind BBC iPlayer unfortunately.

  • @Lance-Stroll
    @Lance-Stroll 3 місяці тому +5

    I have a bidet and a travel bidet

  • @welcome_back_to_1972
    @welcome_back_to_1972 3 місяці тому +4

    Notice how no one, even in the comments, has stated which group was the oblivious one? Or did I miss it? And how has QI brought me to ask about such a topic? 😅

    • @andrybak
      @andrybak 3 місяці тому +4

      Both are. Both groups don't know about the existence of the other.

    • @angrytedtalks
      @angrytedtalks 3 місяці тому

      You are probably still oblivious about nobs and yobs.

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому +1

      It's toilet humour in its purest form.

  • @TonyBongo869
    @TonyBongo869 3 місяці тому +1

    And that’s how the blue man group was formed

  • @darthmarticusLFC
    @darthmarticusLFC 3 місяці тому +3

    bog roll sounds vile, I've never said that. Toilet paper.

    • @stanleyt.7930
      @stanleyt.7930 3 місяці тому +2

      That's non U. Lavatory, not toilet.

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому

      What about Anal Wipes? Those damp, individual tissues you can get to wipe your bum with. They're smoother on the botty than paper and they leave it smelling sweeter, too.

  • @annalieff-saxby568
    @annalieff-saxby568 3 місяці тому

    The way to tell a nob from a yob is to ask them to recite the following sentence: "Thousands and thousands of boy scouts, routing around in their brown trousers". Results guaranteed!

  • @charleshagen1143
    @charleshagen1143 3 місяці тому +2

    Well, this devolved rather quickly...

  • @PeterGaunt
    @PeterGaunt 3 місяці тому

    Ahem, some of us do both: first sitting down then standing up.

  • @rayguns910
    @rayguns910 3 місяці тому

    What episode?

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage 3 місяці тому +17

    Wait... none of you spin?

  • @Longingtobesomeone
    @Longingtobesomeone 3 місяці тому +5

    I don't understand why people stand up? I just sit and reach back.

    • @bigredsock1
      @bigredsock1 3 місяці тому

      I find it hurts to wipe sitting down, that's why I stand up.

  • @stephenshipley1066
    @stephenshipley1066 3 місяці тому

    How To Get On In Society by John Betjeman
    Phone for the fish knives, Norman
    As cook is a little unnerved;
    You kiddies have crumpled the serviettes
    And I must have things daintily served.
    Are the requisites all in the toilet?
    The frills round the cutlets can wait
    Till the girl has replenished the cruets
    And switched on the logs in the grate.
    It's ever so close in the lounge dear,
    But the vestibule's comfy for tea
    And Howard is riding on horseback
    So do come and take some with me
    Now here is a fork for your pastries
    And do use the couch for your feet;
    I know that I wanted to ask you-
    Is trifle sufficient for sweet?
    Milk and then just as it comes dear?
    I'm afraid the preserve's full of stones;
    Beg pardon, I'm soiling the doileys
    With afternoon tea-cakes and scones.

  • @raulposse
    @raulposse 3 місяці тому +3

    Bidet all the way...

  • @JonasHamill
    @JonasHamill 3 місяці тому

    Wait so is it Loo paper or Toilet paper?

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому +1

      Bog roll.

    • @krashd
      @krashd 2 місяці тому

      Shit wipe.

  • @pacanukeha
    @pacanukeha 3 місяці тому

    toilet paper. it's called toilet paper

  • @litigioussociety4249
    @litigioussociety4249 3 місяці тому +3

    I thought it was a guy vs girl thing for a long time. I stand, but could understand why a girl would wipe after peeing before getting up; whereas, most men don't wipe after peeing, they just let their underwear turn more yellow like Patrick Star.

    • @SonnyDarvishzadeh
      @SonnyDarvishzadeh 3 місяці тому +2

      I carry a tissue with me for urinal. Can't think of getting the underwear getting wet.

    • @EebstertheGreat
      @EebstertheGreat 3 місяці тому +3

      The usual method is to shake it off. That works better for some than for others.

    • @JonasHamill
      @JonasHamill 3 місяці тому

      @@EebstertheGreat and singing taylor swift

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@EebstertheGreat Men and women are a little bit like laundry. Men shake off, but women drip dry.

    • @just-tess
      @just-tess Місяць тому

      and shake it for a while, I'm told! ua-cam.com/video/U1_bIPPPxz4/v-deo.html

  • @seedye
    @seedye 3 місяці тому +1

    Flush. Tea-bag the bowl for a bracing rinse. Repeat if the water’s tinted. Shimmy the water off while sitting. I respect trees too much to use TP.

    • @just-tess
      @just-tess Місяць тому

      there is 100% post-consumer recycled TP... and I hope you do your own laundry...!
      eta, and now at least one or two bamboo brands, technically a grass!

  • @just-tess
    @just-tess Місяць тому

    dear god tell me there aren't female bodied people wiping back to front if that's what he means...

  • @CricketEngland
    @CricketEngland 3 місяці тому +8

    I don’t wipe at all, I just wash and go

    • @Blackfyre_93
      @Blackfyre_93 3 місяці тому +1

      It's a real time saver to not wipe XD

    • @Tao_Tology
      @Tao_Tology 3 місяці тому +2

      Toilet + separate bidet = excellent
      Toilet + in-built nozzle _that squirts you with fluids from inside the toilet you've just used_ = vomit inducing 🤢🤮

    • @CricketEngland
      @CricketEngland 3 місяці тому

      @@Tao_Tologyso what do I have ?

    • @Tao_Tology
      @Tao_Tology 3 місяці тому +3

      @@CricketEngland An electronic device and an internet connection.
      'all else is surmise and heresay'

    • @DanielPorowski
      @DanielPorowski 3 місяці тому +3

      @@Tao_Tology In fairness it's not as bad as that'd be; it's a nozzle off the clean water intake/tank. (And on the good ones, it's even heated.) No real difference tbh, except you haven't got to move fixtures.

  • @k400x
    @k400x 3 місяці тому

    Did she say at 04:02 'You are all sat to talk to me. Can I have..'?

    • @pittofdoom
      @pittofdoom 3 місяці тому +14

      She said “You’re Sandi Toksvig!” The woman who burst in recognized her.

    • @Elitist20
      @Elitist20 3 місяці тому +3

      @@pittofdoom And then 'Can I have...[presumably an autograph]?'

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому

      ​@Elitist20 Well, she would have had plenty of paper for one. I'm not sure what she'd use as a writing implement, though.
      Can you use the blue water as a substitute ink?
      Answers on a postage stamp, please.

  • @davidfalconer8913
    @davidfalconer8913 3 місяці тому +3

    ALWAYS fold a sheet down the pan , first ...... this avoids a [ NEPTUNE'S KISS ] .... This is when you drop a Dreadnought 💩 and the resultant tsunami splashes your tea towel holder ( tried - n - tested ) ...... DAVE™🛑

    • @krashd
      @krashd 2 місяці тому

      Sage words.

  • @robynw6307
    @robynw6307 2 місяці тому +1

    Women should wipe from behind. It reduces the risk of UTIs and yeast infections. Men can do it however they like.

  • @johnvella
    @johnvella 3 місяці тому +1

    the wiping tidbit is from reddit.

  • @knudsandbknielsen1612
    @knudsandbknielsen1612 3 місяці тому

    If you got dog poop on your hands, would you wipe it off with toilet paper? Or would you use water?

    • @EebstertheGreat
      @EebstertheGreat 3 місяці тому

      Do you touch food, people, and objects as often with your bare ass as you do with your hands?

    • @simontay4851
      @simontay4851 3 місяці тому +5

      Both. Wipe it off then thoroughly wash your hands.

  • @Daniel-yy5tx
    @Daniel-yy5tx 3 місяці тому +1

    Psyllium husk, chia, and flax. You're welcome.

    • @Aye-McHunt
      @Aye-McHunt 2 місяці тому +1

      Just don't use a Gimpy Gimpy leaf. It may look nice, but it isn't.

    • @krashd
      @krashd 2 місяці тому +2

      What you name your children is no concern of mine.

  • @zapkvr
    @zapkvr 12 днів тому

    FIFTY FIFTY

  • @gurrrn1102
    @gurrrn1102 3 місяці тому

    U and non-U are the stupidest linguistic terms ever. I’m glad they moved on from that pretty quickly.

  • @blackbird5634
    @blackbird5634 3 місяці тому

    Language defines our world. We can only really see and accept what we can create in our minds.
    The idea that an alien spacecraft can land on center field at half time during the Super Bowl and only about 1% of the population watching would see it is not too far off.

  • @simontay4851
    @simontay4851 3 місяці тому

    h

  • @bluesque9687
    @bluesque9687 3 місяці тому

    Jason is the one with least star power ever I have seen on TV! He is most like a regular guy who was in the audience and who joined in!

  • @angrytedtalks
    @angrytedtalks 3 місяці тому

    Stand up. Don't be lazy and do a proper job of cleaning your arse.

  • @SonnyDarvishzadeh
    @SonnyDarvishzadeh 3 місяці тому +13

    Stand up and then wipe? I don't trust those people 🫣

    • @john.premose
      @john.premose 3 місяці тому +2

      I don't trust the ones who sit, that's just gross.

    • @angrytedtalks
      @angrytedtalks 3 місяці тому

      You shouldn't exist. Stand up and don't be disgusting.

  • @RossOneEyed
    @RossOneEyed 3 місяці тому +1

    Ask any service member, regardless of country or branch, how bum fodder is used. We have gotten to see LOTS of different versions of how to wipe your bum....