Light within the darkness (and a book reading)

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  • Опубліковано 29 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 703

  • @RandomSagePodcast
    @RandomSagePodcast  2 дні тому +101

    Revealing Light - How Cancer Illuminated My Divine Blueprint is available online and in bookstores. www.collectiveinkbooks.com/o-books/our-books/revealing-light-cancer-illuminated-divine-blueprint
    For those not wanting to shop at Amazon: Google Play (ebook) books.google.com/books/about/Revealing_Light.html?id=oec2EQAAQBAJ
    Independent bookstores: bookshop.org/p/books/revealing-light-how-cancer-illuminated-my-divine-blueprint-maryann-weston/21532276
    Indigo Books: www.indigo.ca/en-ca/revealing-light-how-cancer-illuminated-my-divine-blueprint/9781803417301.html
    I suggest you search the title on google as there are many more outlets and purchase options which may suit.

    • @donna4475
      @donna4475 2 дні тому +10

      Your book was my last purchase on Amazon!❤

    • @ms12947
      @ms12947 2 дні тому +9

      you bring tears to my eyes. you write so beautifully. what a gift you are to us. love you dear Maryann

    • @smarties6342
      @smarties6342 2 дні тому +5

      Thank you for alternatives to Amazon. Much appreciated.❤

    • @equus3333
      @equus3333 2 дні тому +6

      Congratulations on your new book 📕 🤗🥰✨🫶🏻🕊️

    • @mmartin7224
      @mmartin7224 2 дні тому +2

      Thank you for your wisdom

  • @donaldsweeney784
    @donaldsweeney784 2 дні тому +123

    You are one remarkable woman.

    • @crazylady3829
      @crazylady3829 2 дні тому +2

      So pleased you are doing well with your cancer recovery. America won’t be pleased with Trump announcing he has stopped all cancer research in the USA.

  • @alexandrabellino4655
    @alexandrabellino4655 2 дні тому +196

    I truly have no words. I am weeping right now and my soul weeps for the beauty of your soul and I feel so blessed and grateful to have found you right here, on this channel, one product of your journey. Much love dear MaryAnn, much love 😘😇

    • @MONICARJONES-j2r
      @MONICARJONES-j2r 2 дні тому +12

      This was beautiful ❤

    • @gracevalentine1666
      @gracevalentine1666 2 дні тому +6

      Me too, real tears , how could my country go so low

    • @evysnyder
      @evysnyder 2 дні тому +4

      What she said!!

    • @moniquedemers328
      @moniquedemers328 2 дні тому +5

      I feel the same way she is one special lady,, and we are so lucky to have her

    • @BellasDogDad
      @BellasDogDad День тому +3

      Well said! I am grateful to have found her in this massive UA-cam platform. I am also glad she started a UA-cam channel.

  • @PinkLady45
    @PinkLady45 2 дні тому +158

    Love your “realness” Maryann. You are a very special person who helps everyone. Your kindness and compassion come through everything you say. Much love to you dear❤

    • @keithsparrow7717
      @keithsparrow7717 2 дні тому +3

      I think this a reason I watch this channel. Maryanne is so 'real' and sensible, and aware that what she predicts isn't necessarily true until it is confirmed by life.

  • @karentruett5444
    @karentruett5444 2 дні тому +110

    I was having a really bad day. Everything is too much and nothing is helping today- until now. I’m breathing now. Thank you.

    • @SusanWelch-ms9hg
      @SusanWelch-ms9hg 2 дні тому +7

      Yes, some days can be almost too much to bear.

    • @cdubya3071
      @cdubya3071 2 дні тому +2

      My bad day pales into comparison to hers. 😢

    • @lornamurphy7531
      @lornamurphy7531 2 дні тому +3

      Praying for you.❤

    • @vaunniethayer1484
      @vaunniethayer1484 2 дні тому +4

      Hang in there. You are not alone, this is such a tough time.

    • @bonnieprice9482
      @bonnieprice9482 2 дні тому +3

      Keep breathing and ground yourself...😂

  • @GdHr-oz5ph
    @GdHr-oz5ph 2 дні тому +62

    Wow. Maryann, I hope you know how important you are to so many of us. What a shining example of how to live.
    Sending best energy and love to you always. ❤

  • @marshahostetler
    @marshahostetler 2 дні тому +85

    I so appreciate that you put what you went through out there for us all to learn and help us cope when all seems dark. Love and Light to you, your family and fur babies!

  • @deborahwalker7406
    @deborahwalker7406 2 дні тому +41

    naming their baby after you're beloved sister is testimony to their great love for you, dearest Mary Ann. thank you.

  • @svgerard
    @svgerard 2 дні тому +67

    You are very poetic with your words, Maryann. What a beautiful reading today. Thank you for sharing your gifts with us 💕

  • @breann_
    @breann_ 2 дні тому +39

    Congrats on the grandbabies! What a beautiful way to honor your sister💕

  • @PamBigelow
    @PamBigelow 2 дні тому +44

    They not only named her Jane. They also named her Star - the ever-shining Light!

  • @Deba_ra
    @Deba_ra 2 дні тому +75

    Congratulations on so many levels. Your love and loss speak loudly. A new grandchild, how lovely.

  • @patriciaself2957
    @patriciaself2957 2 дні тому +39

    i am so sorry for your loss. 🙏❣️🥲

  • @avriljones3576
    @avriljones3576 2 дні тому +39

    So looking forward to reading your book. I nearly died 14 years ago, long story but l had 2 Angel's appear to me. I lost my son nearly 6 years ago but my belief keeps me going.
    Thank you for telling your story, l am so looking forward to reading it xxx❤

  • @bamboowomandancing
    @bamboowomandancing 2 дні тому +43

    Beautiful and profound! Bless your soul.

  • @Vandermin011
    @Vandermin011 2 дні тому +50

    Just beautiful Maryann, thank you ❤

  • @vaunniethayer1484
    @vaunniethayer1484 2 дні тому +11

    Maryann, I don’t typically get into the paranormal, but your picture came up on my UA-cam feed and I thought, I need to check this out. Call it my intuition or inner voice, I’ve learned to listen to it and it rarely steers me wrong. Happily I am so glad I did. Your strength and goodness shine through. You are on my regular go to list and with what is going on in my country, I am especially grateful.

  • @teachercjcraig60
    @teachercjcraig60 2 дні тому +31

    I had a series of NDEs while hospitalized in Colombia for 38 days ~ I too had a spiritual awakening at that time where my intuition became so much more available. It’s been very helpful and I certainly appreciate your insights

  • @letispillane
    @letispillane 2 дні тому +30

    Grand baby. Congratulations. Blessing to you.

  • @jenken8337
    @jenken8337 2 дні тому +48

    It's wonderful when you are connected to your higher self & your guides!
    I'm glad you are sharing this with the World ❤

  • @valentinaf9470
    @valentinaf9470 3 дні тому +28

    Thank you for sharing your story about your life, and the challenges you went through during cancer treatment.

  • @alesha1198
    @alesha1198 2 дні тому +43

    Love and Light 💙💪

  • @jenken8337
    @jenken8337 2 дні тому +22

    I am so glad I found you, just by accident as I was scrolling UA-cam one day.
    But then, they say there are no accidents.

  • @JanetPerini-ey9kd
    @JanetPerini-ey9kd 2 дні тому +34

    Your book will arrive in about two days. At a time when I am physically struggling with my own vulnerabilities, You remind me that there is something so
    Much larger at work that I can trust, that I can surrender to in the path towards stability. I honor you and your sister, Mary, who surely
    Must inspire you from the other side! Thank you.

  • @barbaraweiss9114
    @barbaraweiss9114 2 дні тому +24

    Sharing your courageous battle with us by peviewing your book was so touching. Thank you again for your honesty and grace.❤

  • @JoanStar38
    @JoanStar38 2 дні тому +78

    Shine on Bright Star! So grateful for You.
    💫🌟💫

  • @DrLindaFWilliams
    @DrLindaFWilliams 2 дні тому +36

    Oooohhhh, Maryann. Powerful prose. Powerful journey. Powerful transformation. "...left a gaping wound in my spirit." "Death came out of the closet. But so did life." SO many gems struck me to my core as you read this remarkable chapter. It left an indelible impression of light and hope.
    Seven years... I can relate. It took 7 years for my writing as well. Stay blessed, knowing you are Jane's legacy. As long as you breathe. As long as you walk in purpose. As long as you hold a heart of love, her legacy will ALWAYS be more than lipservice.
    -A Fellow Cancer Survivor

  • @Sherry1962
    @Sherry1962 2 дні тому +19

    Congratulations, Maryann on your new book and on Grand baby Estelle. That's my daughter's middle name. I've pre-ordered and can't wait to read your book.

  • @cindyhendrix7521
    @cindyhendrix7521 2 дні тому +21

    Thank you for your beautiful book and for your spirit

  • @knelson3484
    @knelson3484 2 дні тому +18

    Hello Maryann. Wonderful to see you. 🙂

  • @POGGIOALSERE
    @POGGIOALSERE 2 дні тому +6

    There are no adequate words to express how I felt when listening to you read this beautiful chapter of your book. This message has come at a particular time in my life ,on this particular day ,when I really needed to hear those words. Thank you,Maryann🙏

  • @Dot-Dot-Dash
    @Dot-Dot-Dash 2 дні тому +20

    Thank-you for sharing such a beautiful life story. When I worked in Hospice, I learned that when people become "terminal" they become much wiser than the rest of us. I am so grateful that you are still with us.

  • @Oceanaqua1
    @Oceanaqua1 2 дні тому +12

    Maryann I was 53 when I received my cancer diagnosis and I also experienced a loss at the time of my diagnosis ❤ I can testify to PTSD and major depressive disorder. I am in tears. So sorry you had that experience, but we are evolving. Spiritually. And intuitively.. I am sending you love light and a spiritual hug my friend❤

    • @seasheleyes
      @seasheleyes День тому +1

      Feeling a kinship with you also. Sibling loss, cancer, and PTSD. ❤️

  • @BlazinginBlazingin
    @BlazinginBlazingin 2 дні тому +14

    Beautiful. Tears in my eyes

  • @MerylMiller-u4e
    @MerylMiller-u4e 2 дні тому +17

    Looking forward to reading your words of wisdom. ❤

  • @anonymity6876
    @anonymity6876 2 дні тому +21

    "After the storm the sun rises again"🙏
    Love and light ✨️ 🫶 🌻 🦋 🧡 ⚪️

  • @anniehamlett8761
    @anniehamlett8761 2 дні тому +16

    Thank you, Maryann. ❤

  • @janegerald6380
    @janegerald6380 2 дні тому +7

    Thank you, Maryann, a deeply spiritual and authentic lady who gives so much to all of us. I'm so happy your cancer journey has shown us that, potentially, we can be transformed within our soul.

  • @prenaivezaj3227
    @prenaivezaj3227 2 дні тому +16

    You've been through a lot, stay strong 💪 Your sister is the angel watching over you 🤍 Congratulations and God bless baby, Grandma & family 🙏❤️

  • @Lindaastewart7015
    @Lindaastewart7015 2 дні тому +8

    What can I say? That was beautiful. Thank you for sharing- I could feel how private you are, yet you let us on on the journey . Thank you.

  • @lindafrazier8092
    @lindafrazier8092 2 дні тому +16

    Thank you Maryann! I have pre-ordered your book and look forward to reading it! I'm at another crossroad in life ... your story is so important and will help so many move forward... again heartfelt thanks!

  • @Jenbee1010
    @Jenbee1010 2 дні тому +11

    Hi Maryann! Here from Canada 🇨🇦

  • @mimialvarez6010
    @mimialvarez6010 2 дні тому +17

    Absolutely beautiful!!! Thank you Maryann. Book ordered, can't wait. Had a similar journey in 2013. Am grateful for the spiritual wisdom that came from the experience. Thank you for all that you are and the space you hold in the world for all of us. Much love ❤

  • @lesliefisk1269
    @lesliefisk1269 2 дні тому +20

    Sending love and light your way Maryann 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

  • @BlazinginBlazingin
    @BlazinginBlazingin 2 дні тому +11

    Always enjoy

  • @lindacooper1574
    @lindacooper1574 2 дні тому +16

    I'm very excited for you. Love and Light. Blessings to you always.❤

  • @maryhubble5801
    @maryhubble5801 2 дні тому +17

    🕯️♥️ Thank you, MaryAnn. 🙏

  • @GrammasGoneCrafty
    @GrammasGoneCrafty 2 дні тому +13

    Thank you! 🙏

  • @geraldineleegibson1187
    @geraldineleegibson1187 2 дні тому +10

    So happy to see you. Can not wait to see the book !

  • @jolys3300
    @jolys3300 2 дні тому +5

    Maryann, thank you for sharing your healing journey. After listening to you talk about the trauma that grief, loss, and illness can cause I now understand I haven't given myself enough grace through my own healing journey. Blessings to you.

  • @valerieg9494
    @valerieg9494 2 дні тому +6

    Thank you, Maryann. I'm so sorry for your loss. You are a brave and strong person. You are a beacon of hope. Congratulations on the birth of your granddaughter. Sending love and light to you.

  • @maryhiggins6783
    @maryhiggins6783 2 дні тому +8

    I can't wait to read this! I love your attitude and the fact that you are sharing this with us.

  • @bookwoman5130
    @bookwoman5130 2 дні тому +10

    I just received your book!!!!!!

    • @batk0427
      @batk0427 2 дні тому

      @@bookwoman5130 What! Did you order from Amazon? I'm still waiting on mines.

  • @debmckinsey3454
    @debmckinsey3454 2 дні тому +11

    That was beautiful! I can't wait to read it! ❤

  • @helenmarquez
    @helenmarquez 2 дні тому +10

    You are an amazing human being. I feel you have blessed us with your wisdom and guidance. Your gifts are blessings and more authentic life.
    Sending love to you. I also got your book pre-ordered.

  • @benedictmarshall7031
    @benedictmarshall7031 2 дні тому +11

    Beautifully written and read. A member of my family has been through 2 years of treatment, and looking on, I felt pretty helpless to help - leaving her medication and surgery in the good hands of doctors, nurses and surgeon. All through it, she has shown huge resilience. Thankfully, her treatment has completed, and she appears to be recovering. Thankfully, too, she has recently started a new job that she has always dreamed of. Thanks to the Universe, and thank you for your reading.

  • @deniseferguson8998
    @deniseferguson8998 2 дні тому +25

    Thank you Maryann for sharing your journey with us. You're such an inspiration and guiding Light! If you can find strength in fighting a battle with cancer I can find enough strength to fight what's currently going on here in the US now. Spirit must have saw in you a great warrior. A warrior who's time is now! God bless you dear Maryann! 💜

  • @SylviaHawley
    @SylviaHawley 2 дні тому +9

    will love reading this account, the opportunities spiritually in our setbacks materially . . . is wonderful to be able to have the awareness . . . gifts from the timeless when we are up against the wall . .

  • @KimBanman
    @KimBanman 2 дні тому +10

    Thank you for sharing your experience. It must have been so hard to go through, both physically and mentally. I'm so happy you've conquered cancer and become the person you were meant to be. God bless you and your spirit. ❤ .
    -😊

  • @arielog1941
    @arielog1941 2 дні тому +8

    and a tear to mine.
    to loses a sister is a tearful path.
    Namaste

  • @harveynorton3666
    @harveynorton3666 2 дні тому +8

    Thank you, Maryann, for sharing part of your life story and your new book. I experienced your reading of the chapter of your book in a meditative state. It was/is a profound experience. I am also a cancer survivor and I am also still becoming light. Sending you peace, love and light. You have a beautiful heart and soul. Thank you. H. N.

  • @moodyblue1953
    @moodyblue1953 2 дні тому +9

    Only one simple comment, EXCELLENT! I hope this book becomes a best seller and may it reach the right people who need its message. Bravo, Bravo,Bravo Maryann!🌹🌹🌹🌹

  • @karinbaird2499
    @karinbaird2499 2 дні тому +7

    Beautiful writing ❤️

  • @PatriciaPearl111
    @PatriciaPearl111 2 дні тому +5

    40-60 crows would show up on the front lawn most mornings when my then-spouse was in the early months of his brain cancer. Thank you for sharing your journey. ❤

  • @sati81763
    @sati81763 2 дні тому +7

    What a beautiful honor to your sister Jane. As well as an honoring of self, life and the light. Thank you for sharing your journey through darkness with us. May we all find the light within and in others too.❤
    Side comment: I woke up this morning to the cawing of a crow. Just now as I reflect, a dove coos in the trees outside my window. Peace.

  • @lorrainewilliams2264
    @lorrainewilliams2264 2 дні тому +8

    Just ordered your book. X

  • @Victoria-uh7dy
    @Victoria-uh7dy 2 дні тому +6

    God Bless you, dear Maryann. We all love, appreciate and are too always grateful for all you do for us... Keeping faith and hope for Light to Prevail for humanity.. 🙏🙏🙏❤❤❤

  • @kinda1dren
    @kinda1dren День тому +1

    That was so very special to hear you read your words, thank you so very much!!! And congratulations on your new Granddaughter, how very lucky she is to have you for her Grandma ❤❤❤🎉

  • @teresaramsey
    @teresaramsey 2 дні тому +5

    Beautiful in every way ❤

  • @jeannejj
    @jeannejj 3 дні тому +14

    I’m excited to get the book! Thank you so much for your love. ☮️🦋💕

  • @maryfbrunette5890
    @maryfbrunette5890 2 дні тому +8

    I was touched by your experience, Maryann. Thank you! Although i haven’t had breast cancer, i lost my dear sister, my sibling to whom i was closest, to breast cancer early this month after her two year struggle. The raven is my totem. A giant raven, master of the underworld, who guided me down a long dark tunnel at the end of which i could see a tiny point of light. After many trips toward this light, i saw that the light was coming around a door. When i finally reached the door and opened it, i was in a beautiful garden-paradise, the garden of Eden. What Joy! My own crisis came when i was in a head on collision and ended up immobilized in traction in the hospital. After 16 hours of surgery, i started my healing journey with an artificial shoulder, a metal rod, multiple metal plates, pins, and screws AND an immense sense of GRATITUDE for my life. I start each day greeting the rising Sun with prayers of gratitude and say Thank You throughout my day!!

    • @marianclaassen8127
      @marianclaassen8127 День тому +1

      @@maryfbrunette5890 sending you pink ribbons of light, my heart to yours

  • @geralyn-mm
    @geralyn-mm День тому +1

    I have tears in my eyes. Thank you Maryann -My very best wishes to you and yours.

  • @kathymcloughlin7730
    @kathymcloughlin7730 2 дні тому +11

    I will be ordering your book tomorrow Maryann 🌷 I have such admiration for you my friend. I do worry about you when you aren't doing well, and you are always in my prayers. My mom had cancer, and since she came to live with us after my father died, I became her full time caretaker. She unfortunately didn't survive, but I can truthfully tell you that I got to know her better than I ever had, and was grateful to be there for her until her last breathe, and even help the hospice nurse that came, to wash her body and kiss her goodbye before she was forever gone from my physical world. I see her and my father in my times of need in the cardinals that show up in our yard. You are such a special person, and you touch so many lives in such a positive way. I will always cherish your friendship and loving nature ♥️🙏

  • @nancygalusha3299
    @nancygalusha3299 2 дні тому +7

    Thank you for sharing your journey with us, Mary Ann. Much love to you. ❤️

  • @irmalee6556
    @irmalee6556 2 дні тому +8

    Thank you that was so profound. Loved it.

  • @ncholloway1
    @ncholloway1 2 дні тому +4

    So good to see you and get your message today ❤

  • @debragoodman6523
    @debragoodman6523 2 дні тому +7

    Beautiful Maryann,
    Just beautiful.
    Keep shining your light. You are much needed.
    May you find what you need within, to accomplish your goals and dreams.
    Sweet sister Jane is helping you.
    Thankful for you & your family.
    Blessings, my friend

  • @boobookitty424
    @boobookitty424 2 дні тому +5

    ❤❤❤ from Florida. I’m glad you caught your cancer early too. Thank you for giving me hope and helping to build my faith🙏.

  • @jimaustin2650
    @jimaustin2650 2 дні тому +6

    Your book will appear on my Kindle in a couple of days. I am so glad I found you. Love and blessings ❤.

  • @kevans6824
    @kevans6824 2 дні тому +9

    Congradultion on your new grandbaby. Babys always bring joy and hope.❤❤

    • @MargaretRoy-g8l
      @MargaretRoy-g8l 2 дні тому

      Thank you for sharing your reading, and part of your cancer journey. Blessings Maryanne. Xx

  • @mysticdax
    @mysticdax 2 дні тому +10

    Thank you so much, Maryann, for sharing your journey and your gifts with us during these difficult times. ♥

  • @KimberN111
    @KimberN111 2 дні тому +9

    ❤❤ Looking forward to experiencing your book Maryann! The chapter you read was inspiring, and I can hardly wait to read more. Thank you for sharing your darkest experiences, and your long path to finding yourself again. You are a bright light in these dark times and I appreciate you so much! Stay strong my friend! ❤❤

  • @terrijopeterson2277
    @terrijopeterson2277 2 дні тому +7

    Thank you for this. I just came from the doctor, now need a MRI to look for tumors on my spine. I am praying that it isn't from tumors but a car accident 2 years ago. Buying your book today for my Kindle.
    Congratulations on your granddaughter, Estelle Jane🎉❤❤❤ Granddaughters are the best.

  • @Ecksunbeam
    @Ecksunbeam 2 дні тому +3

    You brought me to tears, Grandma. CONGRATULATIONS! I'm so glad you are still here. And so are those babies.

  • @cindyloomis-torvi3396
    @cindyloomis-torvi3396 2 дні тому +2

    Hi Maryann. Thank you for this book. As you talked about your life pre cancer, I was also a working mother minus one year when we couldn’t find the right day care. I was also finishing up a university degree (9 yrs total), two more degrees (7.5 yrs total). We moved 16 times and three US states in their life time. I’m the fourth generation of working mother in my mother’s line. When my MIL asked, how did I manage it all, I replied “4-5 hours of sleep, rare social outings besides congregational life, and brought my notes and books ever where.” She shook her head. She has been a stay at home mother when it was impressed upon her that she shouldn’t work, and her personality is such that volunteering rarely occurred to her. Through most of that 23 year time period pf raising children, I sang in choir, I volunteered to be a school trip chaperone. Each of my three sons got one trip a year that I volunteered for. I wasn’t PTA mom, but I never missed a teachers conference, therapy education conference. Which was far more than my ex spouse did. He still didn’t remember the kids birthdates when I filed for divorce. I was essentially married but raising children as a single mother.
    I too had this thing about animals. We lived on acreage that had a pretty decent population of wild creatures including owls. I surreptitiously turned an old unused shed into sort of a living complex for these animals. I wanted to be a doctor,but couldn’t afford that amount of tuition to attend. I became a nurse instead, which led to my three jobs in nursing to pay my way through four years of school on a dual degree.
    It was my third pregnancy and delivery that led the hidden multiple complex auto immune disease out in the open. I was t able to take on 16-18 hr days every day any more. The only time I had medical care after 25 was when I was pregnant until I was in my late thirties living in the US. So, I soldiered on, using free health clinics when the autoimmune disease flared up or I caught severe bouts of lung related winter illness. I went 14 years without dental care. I had two broken teeth and a tooth infection that I nursed along for five years. In the words of a dear friend from my state, “It was what it was,” I wasn’t any different than most of the population of adults at the time. Auto workers and union people had very good healthcare and pensions, but we born in 1965 and later, it was a mixed bag as we went through four economic recession- depressions in our state. Then 75% of the population lost their health care.
    Typical US recession numbers.
    But the really bad, then good, then really bad things hadn’t arrived yet that exacerbated my medical condition. No books had existed, no good medical research sites, support groups. Medicines and combos hadn’t found their way into the minds and hands of physicians yet.
    My dad died. He was my primary parent. I became an orphan in my own family in the space of 24 hours. His last requests to me were: “finish your education, take care of Mother, and divorce that bastard.”
    I waited a year, taking a year to finish gathering evidence against my toxic sociopath narcissist spouse, and saved up as much money as possible for a very good female lawyer.
    A 3.5 year divorce battle, 4.5 year custody battle nearly did me in.
    Funnily enough a co worker from the online faith and arts magazine that I was the liberal Theologian, submitting articles on topics of the day, started talking to me offline. I found him quite witty, fun and he was one of the only people I could chat with about global issues, science, art, and music.
    I married him two years later.
    Out of safety for himself, my kids were scattered to the winds so we were not targeted (as much, or not at all) by my ex. The two older boys went to the southern US, the littlest who was 12-13, came with me on the 2,000 mile trip to our new home in Canada.
    I got to work in two jobs I loved, received health insurance (we spent thousands fixing my teeth), and the long process of being diagnosed started. 234 medical tests later, I was firmly diagnosed with Mixed Complex Tissue disorder, and I was considered gravely ill, needed to start a gruelling round of treatment as soon as possible. I took my first round of treatment in November and wasn’t fully cognizant until the next April. For the first two months, I couldn’t read, which was quite disturbing to me. I went from being a library branch supervisor to a home bound reader, with two additional weeks time to return my books.
    Ebook audio books had started. They became my connection to modern life. I lost weight, but was swollen as a sausage. I had to wear sunglasses 90% of the time. My body ached, migraines all the time as I got through the side effects of this treatment.
    I’m in a maintenance dose of the same drugs these days. I get flare ups of my condition. I stay home for six weeks between the end of December to February, because I am to avoid flu, Covid, etc that goes round up here where 70% of the population won’t vaccinate unless by court order. I’ve never been able to return to my professional employment again.
    Since I was 12 years old, I had worked at various jobs for money. I was now 48. I had never worked part time on my life. Women in my family live well into their 100s. I had a long life ahead of me.
    So, I slowly started the process of coming back to life. I didn’t know how to settle down. The treatment gradually eased being so gruelling. I could think again. I could process thoughts in a conversation. The simple walk from bed to bathroom was exhausting, but I managed. I relearned some house hold skills, started taking liquid vitamins which helped. I attended my son’s last musical theatre production and his graduation from high school commencement. I lived.
    I realized I had CPSTD. I had to learn to unpack it.
    I was diagnosed with autism at 51. A former high school teacher let me know that I had been diagnosed while in my last two years of highschool- apparently it was a section of testing that all advanced students under took each semester, but my test packet was a bit different. This former teacher relayed to me that my own mother, their teaching colleague refused to acknowledge what was going on,just like she had refused asthma treatment when I needed it. I didn’t have proper medication until I was 25. Apparently, my father was at another child’s teacher conference because he would’ve never let her get away with it.
    That’s when I realized my mother was just as narcissistic as my ex. No wonder they got on like a house afire.
    That moment changed my life. My childhood was not my fault. The abuse I suffered wasn’t my fault.
    Never hearing her voice again in my life was the greatest freedom for me.
    These days, I think I’m still working on the way Forward. I turned 59 this December past, and I’m eager to take on these next years.

  • @corgilove2070
    @corgilove2070 2 дні тому +2

    Thank you Maryann for such a beautiful reading from your newly published book! I look forward to reading it. 💖🎉

  • @sealfan1000
    @sealfan1000 2 дні тому +4

    Feel you in my spirit. Grateful for you being able to articulate these feelings.

  • @altheab.8907
    @altheab.8907 2 дні тому +5

    Light, Love and Blessings dear sweet, Maryann. 🙏🦋🕊💕

  • @laurafairfield7971
    @laurafairfield7971 2 дні тому +4

    Thank you for being here. I lost my mother to Cancer when she was quite young. This has been a brutal year for me. I got THE diagnosis and unexpectedly lost my sister who was my best friend. I will be buying your book as soon as I can. Thank you for sharing.

    • @terryt.1643
      @terryt.1643 2 дні тому +1

      Sending healing thoughts your way, so sorry for your losses.

  • @moodsofflorence
    @moodsofflorence 2 дні тому +4

    Aww, Maryann, thank you 🙏 so much for sharing your personal story with us. You made me cry 😭 as well.

  • @marthanunn5570
    @marthanunn5570 2 дні тому +1

    Ah, the miracle of birth. Welcome Estelle Jane. You have arrived in a world of miracles and will contribute the same. Your Grandmother will certainly be there to share hers while learning from yours. Thank you, as ever MaryAnn, for sharing your gifts. Xxx

  • @joannstellaccio5714
    @joannstellaccio5714 2 дні тому +5

    Maryann you are a very special person I never miss anything that you post I will download your book please stay strong take care of yourself their are days that you help me to get through this crazy live we are living I have had uterus cancer at 17 years old so I completely understand your heartbreak. I also have three sisters. I know your sister would have not wanted it any other way like I said you were truly a special person stay strong for you and your family, of course for all of us that look forward to watching you every day.❤ I should add I will be 73 on March 17th

  • @mandyvasseybryant4618
    @mandyvasseybryant4618 2 дні тому +5

    Your story sounds much like mine with cancer. I had lung cancer almost 20 years ago. I had all the things: surgery, radiation, and chemo. I have survived. I had to give up my job. 12 years later, my son was diagnosed with lung cancer and passed within 8 weeks. Survivor guilt is real. Mental challenges are great. Now at 70, I find myself divorced after he had his 3rd affair. I also have struggled with health problems and disability from the cancer and treatments. The worse has been the trauma of losing my son. I am glad you have found your strength. God bless you.

    • @DonnaLynnPhotog
      @DonnaLynnPhotog 2 дні тому +1

      @@mandyvasseybryant4618 Love to you … losing a child is unimaginable and heart wrenching ❤️💔

    • @vaunniethayer1484
      @vaunniethayer1484 2 дні тому +1

      So many difficult losses, especially your son, so sorry. Life asks so much of us, take care.

  • @Kathy-vy5io
    @Kathy-vy5io 2 дні тому +7

    Hi Maryann! Pre-ordered your book! So looking forward to reading it! My husband passed of cancer 2yrs ago. I also have become aware of my strong intuition prior, during and after his passing. Finding you is my process of healing and moving forward! Blessings 💖

  • @marcieotto8600
    @marcieotto8600 2 дні тому +5

    Are you going to narrate your book for audio? I want to read it but your voice and saying it out loud is almost like going to church. Simply beautiful.

  • @sharonpayne8912
    @sharonpayne8912 2 дні тому +2

    Maryann my arms wrap around you in understanding and look and light forever. You deserve more than anyone I know. ❤❤❤❤❤

  • @Jeanne1125
    @Jeanne1125 2 дні тому +4

    Omg! Same with the crows n change of body n life. 2 time breast cancer Survivor here. Watching you now on my TV. A crow, 1 crow, is the signal to go to the Dr. 2011/2012 first go around. 2014 it came back. EVERYWHERE I went, 1 crow, like waiting there for me to notice. I mean everywhere. Even on vacation, one flew up to our balcony n I knew I needed to finally heed the warning. As soon as I got home, scheduled an appt., n the cancer was back. Also had a couple earth angels give me messages. That was incredible as well. I've since started a small breast cancer non profit to pay it forward. Always changing it up, now implementing spiritual friendship. I'm here if you ever need to talk.
    Very sorry for the loss of your sister and congratulations on your granddaughter!❤

  • @hettysarjeant2548
    @hettysarjeant2548 2 дні тому +3

    Maryann, sending you much appreciation and love for the depth of your sharing of your life experiences. Both the facts you write about and the feelings you express have touched me deeply. “When the student is ready the master appears”.

  • @AnnetteDechant
    @AnnetteDechant 2 дні тому +7

    Thank you, MaryAnn for your light! From one cancer thriver to another. ❤. We've got this!

  • @gracielacobo5412
    @gracielacobo5412 2 дні тому +3

    Maryann, you are a remarkable woman! You have experienced so much pain & suffering & yet you are filled with resiliency & determination! You teach us a profound lesson: fight mind , body & soul when you are at your lowest; whether a life threatening disease or shattering psychological trauma. The human spirit is so amazing! It is filled with spiritual power to help us overcome our weaknesses & our darkest moments.
    There are no coincidences in life. Those blue crows were sent for a special reason. They truly were sending you a message about your health. Just amazing how you have faced death! You are a warrior, a fighter, & a champion! God bless you!!!!!
    What a beautiful soul you have! You have a special gift that has blessed you with the ability to relate to all of us that there are reasons why changes take place in our lives. You teach us that life is a precious gift & never should be taken for granted! Thank you Maryann for sharing a portion of your book.